The Noble Writers (Kiraman Katibin)
Author's Note
Pinkie Pie borrowed Rariangel and Raridevil in “Saddle Row & Rec”. The concept must therefore work the other way around.
The Noble Writers (Kiraman Katibin)
Settling the finished gown back onto its dress model, Rarity paused to admire her own artistry. Sassy Saddles would be pleased, as would the client who had commissioned the piece. She pulled the drapery shut to hide it and turned to the results of her final burst of creativity.
Hmm. Perhaps 'burst' was inaccurate. 'Whirlwind' seemed much more apt.
Sequins lay scattered over the countertop. A roll of lace trim cascaded over several half-open drawers. Ribbons draped several other ponyquins. Several overstuffed pincushions sat atop piles of fabric, with more pins and needles strewn across the floor.
Rarity's ears drooped. She was far too tired to tidy this mess tonight. Oh, couldn't she leave it all until tomorrow? She could do that, yes?
*POOF*
A tiny version of herself, canary yellow in shade, popped into existence at her right shoulder. A pair of wings flapped from a blue belt cinched around its barrel, and a gleaming halo poked up on a wire from the back of its royal purple mane. “Don't leave it until morning!” The little voice so like hers echoed with celestial bells. “Put forth the effort and clear it all away before supper!”
Oh, absolutely! Why waste any more time? She was a dedicated professional, after all! Work was not finished until things were tidy.
*POMF*
Over on her left shoulder, another miniature Rarity appeared with a puff of dark ash. This one was a gorgeous crimson, with a horned headband perched on her mane and a gold-tipped pitchfork stuck to a forehoof. The tip of its purple squiggle-tail sported a red point. “Nonsense!” it declared in the tiny tones of a Rarity who feasted on the richest chocolate. “You've worked so hard, Rarity. Tomorrow's the time to clean up, so take tonight to relax!”
On the other hoof, a true professional stopped to rest when necessary.
Rarity tilted her head affectionately towards the angelic version of herself. “Gifty, you're quite right and I approve of your encouragement, but I am leaning towards Mine's idea tonight. Tomorrow's better for this, because I'm simply bushed.” She held up her left foreleg.
The tiny angel crossed her hooves over her chest, pouting as her devilish counterpart squeaked and dove down to prance atop Rarity's hoof in victory. “Oh, very well.”
Mine pirouetted, sticking both a tongue and a hind leg out at the same time. “pbbbt!”
“Manners, darling,” Rarity chided her devil, leaning closer to Gifty to nuzzle her. “Be gracious in victory.”
Not every pony treated their Conscience and Temptation in the same way. Some would ignore their appearances, fewer still unaware they even existed. Most, though, accepted the offered advice and chose either path offered, be it righteous or selfish.
She adored her own shoulder-critters. They were part of her, after all, and she would give the metaphysical representatives of her psyche the same care she gave herself.
Distracted while she consoled her angel, Rarity never quite saw what happened. It was a mere instant of inattention, a flash of red in the corner of her vision. A tiny anguished yelp, followed by a much louder shriek as Mine lost her balance and plummeted towards a forest of needles in an exposed pincushion.
Rarity's own shriek rattled the windows of the Boutique.
-~-~-~-~-~
“She's going to be okay,” Nurse Sweetheart said, sliding into the waiting room chair next to Rarity. Her own shoulder critters hovered nearby with Gifty between them. “Most of the pins missed her, and the worst she'll have is a sore foreleg for a little while.” Her gaze flicked towards the three tiny ponies huddled together, and she folded her ears back while lowering her voice. “I know this hurts, but I have to make sure. They weren't fighting, were they?”
Rarity almost recoiled, but pressed her hoof to her chest to keep herself calm. “I . . . no! What on earth—”
“It happens,” Sweetheart allowed, her ears coming back up. “Sometimes Rainbow Dash's Conscience and Temptation get into it and they scuffle. It's never anything serious, but there have been other cases when they're pushed too far.” She made some vague gestures with her hooves. “If Gifty did something, she could face consequences from her own kind.”
“No, no, no.” If she could keep repeating that word for hours, she would, if only to make it absolutely clear. “I was holding her, and Gifty was on my other shoulder . . .” Rarity's lip wibbled and she repressed the surge of tears. Her worry faded, relief taking over, but guilt still loomed as an ache inside her.
Nurse Sweetheart glanced up as another pony stopped in front of them, then she hopped to her hooves. “Princess Twilight. I appreciate the quick transportation you offered for Rarity's Temptation, even if you did startle half the ponies in Emergency.” She clicked her tongue, and her critters let Gifty go so she could flitter down and curl against Rarity's shoulder. “We're going to keep her for a few days to make sure, but she could come home by the end of the week. Now, please excuse me.”
Twilight Sparkle nodded as Sweetheart trotted away, then shuffled her hooves. She seemed reluctant to sit down. “Are you okay? You scared us earlier.”
Well, yes, she supposed she had. Bursting into the Map Room while cradling an injured, tiny coloured version of herself was no doubt startling, but the Boutique was at the opposite end of town from the hospital. Much faster to bolt for the castle and beg for a teleportation spell from either Twilight or Starlight Glimmer. “I'm sorry, Twilight, but thank you ever so much.” She lifted a trembling hoof to show her distress. “It was such a shock. Mine will be okay, but I don't know how I'll ever forgive myself.”
“You have to,” she said. “You can't let an accident like that change things. Controlling where or when your Temptation and Conscience appear is very difficult.” She put a foreleg and wing around Rarity's shoulders. “Trust me. Mine showed up often when I had all the alicorn magic of Equestria inside of me. Neither of them thought I should hide it away, either. One wanted me to tell you all and let you help, the other—” Scrunching her muzzle, Twilight looked down at herself. “—preferred that I rule everypony with my new powers.”
Before she could say more, two miniature Twilights poofed into being. One was a pale shade of mauve and sporting the same shining halo as Gifty. The other appeared as a mulberry alicorn with a pitchfork slung between her wings.
“Well, forgive me for hoping you'd finally take advantage of your position!” Mulberry Twilight scoffed from the left. “Was it too much to ask for some ruling from a princess?”
“All that power and Tirek matched it.” The mauve Twilight prodded her full-sized self in the right shoulder. “You needed your friends. You did the right thing.”
Princess Twilight smiled and flicked her ears. “Can you see them? They're here now.”
Rarity nodded, wide-eyed. Often critters wouldn't be visible to others. Once in a while, though, an arrowhead-tipped tail would flick or a halo would sparkle around a pony's head: signs a conversation was happening.
Holding a hoof out, Twilight coaxed her Temptation closer. “I know how scary it is when things go wrong, because she's my second Temptation. I lost my first back when I lived in Canterlot.”
For a pony to actually lose a shoulder critter! Rarity blinked, sudden sympathy overwhelming her own concerns. “Twilight, how awful!” She reached out and slipped a fetlock around her friend's. “I am so sorry, dear. I had no idea.”
“Go on, tell her.” Mauve Angel Twilight crossed her forelegs. “Tell your friend what happens when you disregard proper lab procedures.” She snorted at her counterpart.
“Oh sure, it was so easy for me stepping into her horns,” Mulberry Devil Twilight snapped. “I get to tell Miss Princess of Friendship to think of herself on occasion, not skip safety steps like she did!” She turned around and finally noticed Gifty clinging to Rarity's mane. “Hold on. Is that what we have here? Another Temptation's in trouble?”
Twilight's little angel gasped and swooped over, wrapping Gifty up in a hug. “Oh, you poor thing!”
“It's okay,” Twilight soothed her critters. “Her Temptation just lost her balance and a needle stuck her leg, that's all.” She snagged her own Temptation before she could pull her pitchfork and dive at Rarity. “No, no! Don't you dare. She feels bad enough as it is. Go on, both of you. There's no dilemma here you need to solve. We've got this.”
Two tiny scowls and two puffs of white and black smoke ensued.
Gifty chittered softly and stroked Rarity's mane, then she also vanished in a white puff of cloud.
“Sorry." Twilight folded her ears, her cheeks flushed. “They're touchy about how shoulder critters get treated.”
Rarity sighed. “Yes, so I see.” She waved a hoof through the spot where Gifty had been. Would her Conscience have anyone to tell about this? Was there anyone else out there who cared about Mine? “You never named yours?”
Twilight shrugged. “I suppose we don't have the same relationship you do. There aren't a lot of books on the subject, and the few volumes that exist tend to be scientific in nature. I knew they were projections of my mind early on, so that was how I treated them.” She put a wing over Rarity's back. “My first Temptation made a mistake and it cost us her life. My Conscience went into a shell and I couldn't help her, not until another Temptation came along.”
Rarity leaned against her. “We do treat them differently, darling. When two small versions of me appeared, telling me 'Mine!' or 'Gifty!', it was how I grew to know them.” She nuzzled her friend, then grunted as she uncurled herself. “Now, I want to see Mine for myself to make sure she's comfortable, then I must go home and soak in a lovely bath. My nerves are simply frazzled.”
Refolding her wing, Twilight nodded. “I'm glad she's going to be okay. If you need anything, we're all here.”
Later, she'd find a suitable gift for her friend. Something best able to express the words still caught in her throat. For now, all she could do was smile and nod, batting her lashes to whisk away the tears.
-~-~-~-~-~
When the dress design in front of her acquired a slim, arrow-pointed tail for the third time, Rarity set down her sketching materials and resisted crumpling up the paper. Was she upset? Yes, but that was no reason to ruin perfectly good art. Mine was on her mind and she had to acknowledge that if she meant to continue creating.
Her guilt at the situation had eased somewhat, but the bigger problem was having only her Conscience to aid her. Like the Sun and Moon in Equestria, a pony needed balance. Too much selfishness could lead to trouble , while too much goodwill . . .
Rarity shook her head and nickered at the absurdity that she could be too generous a pony. Then again, unrestrained generosity was dangerous. Giving Suri Polomare enough fabric to steal the fashion show, for example, or letting Sassy Saddles run roughshod over Canterlot Boutique. Too weak a will could ruin a businessmare like herself. Her Temptation was there to remind her she should look out for herself.
Well, not at that moment. The poor little thing was lying in a small recovery wing of Ponyville Hospital, bandaged and feeling sorry for herself. Rarity had checked in on her after breakfast and promised to be back before visiting hours ended.
Sighing, she narrowed her gaze at her sketch. Could it use a flair for the devilish, after all? Picking up the graphite stick in her magic, she began experimenting. A curving horn added here, the swirl of sheer fabric there. Soon a daring new gown pattern emerged.
There. Something to indulge the hurt still simmering beneath her breast. It wasn't her fault, true, but she was responsible and this was how she would forgive herself.
*POMF*
She yelped and skittered sideways, spooked, as something pricked her left shoulder.
“Oh, I'm so sorry! Did that hurt? I didn't mean to poke that hard.”
She swivelled her ears around, the tone and lilt of the voice familiar, if higher-pitched. “Fluttershy?” A glance confirmed, yes, a devilish version of her friend was currently examining her pitchfork.
“I don't think I sharpened the tines that much last night,” the tiny Pegasus commented. She stuck her tongue out as she tapped the points with an amber hoof. “Ow! Mmmf!” Blowing on the sole, she shook her foreleg and grimaced. “Oh, perhaps I did.”
*POOF*
Gifty popped into being. “Hmmph! Next time, wait for me!” she chittered, swooping beneath Rarity's mane to confront Devilshy. “She didn't know you were coming!”
“Sorry,” Fluttershy's Temptation apologized again. She looked forlorn as she flitted down to perch on top of the lectern. “I hope I haven't made things worse?”
Had her friends had arranged this, or was there a loan program for ponies without a critter? She reached out, offering the little pony a hoof. “You haven't, darling. It was nice of Fluttershy to send you.”
“Oh, she doesn't know I'm here.” Devilshy's ears drooped beneath her headband, sad expression still in place as she ignored the extended hoof. “She won't notice I'm missing for a while, and I couldn't stay while you're here without your Temptation.” She leaned over to study the sketch. “Oh, are you hoping a gown will make things all better?”
Rarity blinked. “The gown is immaterial; no matter the colour, it simply wouldn't suit Mine. I can't begin to make up for her accident with a mere dress. This is me dealing with my troubles in my own way.”
Devilshy set her pitchfork down on the podium. “Well then, good. I'm very pleased to hear that.” A miniature scroll popped into existence in front of her and unfurled itself. “So, knowing that, I hope you'll allow me to be formal?”
She cleared her throat, her voice much stronger. “'From the Ponyville chapter of the Association of Honorable Recorders: Since you, Rarity, are a Pony of Great Interest in this branch, we will not leave you without a Temptation for the the period in which yours is indisposed. Therefore, the Executive Board of Recorders will take on her duties until such time as she is able to reassume them. You will be under our scrutiny, and if our findings warrant further action, it will be acknowledged on the date of her return.'”
Folding her hooves together, Devilshy bowed her head. “This isn't a formal inquiry, as we know you didn't mean for anything to happen to your Temptation. We're here to help both your Conscience and you, but also ensure your Recorders are in a good, safe environment. Any questions?”
Rarity blinked. She glanced over at Gifty.
Her little Conscience nodded. “Fluttershy's Temptation is a Board member for the Ponyville Recorders. You can trust her.” Her eyes narrowed. “As much as one trusts a Temptation.”
The miniature horned Pegasus swooped to her spot near Rarity's left shoulder. “Our ponies depend on us to provide them options in life. Temptations have only your best interests at heart, not those of any other pony.” She snorted. “Mine's learning that lesson slowly, but she's getting better. Did you see her dealing with those Journal ponies? ASSERTIVE!” She pumped a tiny hoof.
“Question, dear?” Rarity gestured, and Devilshy quickly scooped up her pitchfork. “Does Mine need anything looked after, ah, wherever you come from? Is somepony taking care of that?”
She nodded. “Oh, yes. While Twilight Sparkle's Temptation brought this to the board's attention, your Conscience made sure your own Temptation's affairs were looked after. You don't need to worry about that.”
“Good.” Pleased, Rarity attempted to pat her. All that earned was a puff of dark cloud as Devilshy vanished before the hoof could land. “Hmmf. Touchy little things.”
Gifty shrugged, darted down for a quick nuzzle, then poofed away again.
-~-~-~-~-~
Kicking the door shut behind her, Rarity unwound her scarf and floated it over to a hook. Halfway to the kitchen, she glanced over her shoulder and scowled at its lopsided state. Magic flared, but the tug on one end nearly yanked it off the hook instead. Her frustration kicked up another notch. “Rrrrrr!”
Deciding to leave it before her mood caused the yarn to snag and ruin the scarf, Rarity turned her magical focus onto the freezer door and popped it open. Ha! She knew she still had some Trottingham Triple Chocolate ice cream!
She whisked a spoon from the drawer and flopped herself down at the table. The ice cream carton's top shot into the air as she pushed her irritation into power. Its clatter coincided with the *POOF* at her right shoulder.
Before Gifty could say anything, Rarity shook her head. “Please, dear, nothing about how this will go straight to my flanks, or keep me awake. This is the only good thing that's happened today, and I am going to indulge in it!” A tiny noise interrupted her, and she glanced down to see a wide-eyed angel pony with her own little bowl and spoon, eyes big and shimmering as she held it up in her hooves. “Oh, Gifty, dear, I'm so sorry. Of course you can join me.”
She nudged the carton over to her Conscience and allowed her to have the first scoop. Her gaze turned towards the spot where whichever Temptation was helping today would make their appearance.
*POMF*
“Don't think she was going to bother you too much about the indulgin',” a blood-orange Applejack commented, setting her hay fork aside and producing a spoon of her own. “An' for the record, I'm encouraging this consumption of chocolate.” She hovered on the other side of the carton, eyeing the ice cream.
“Dig in, darling,” Rarity allowed, filling her own bowl and murmuring in appreciation at the first mouthful. She knew she shouldn't do this too often, but this was her refuge when everything else was falling to pieces.
Several Temptations had popped in and out of her life this week, all members of the Executive for Honorable Recorders. Some had taken up Mine's role in guiding her, while others were 'just observing'. It had been fine so far, but oh, how she missed her own little Temptation.
At least there had been no Friendship missions or monster attacks, but she had to tempt fate by visiting her parents earlier tonight, hadn't she?
Gifty sat on the lip of the carton, swishing her tail as she ate. “Your mother loves you,” she finally said, shrugging as her spoon clinked against the bowl, “she's proud of you, and you know that.”
“Sure she does, but she's bein' selfish about wantin' grandfoals.” Applejack's Temptation offered her side of things. “It don't mean Rarity needs to drop all her business and settle down right here and now.”
Of course, Cookie Crumbles hadn't made any such suggestion, but honestly, every time Rarity went over, it was “Your career is lovely, dear, but aren't you tired of being alone in that boutique?”. At least neither of her parents objected to her saving Equestria several times over.
Her mother's comments didn't usually bother her, but tonight's cheerful, oblivious requests for a wedding or a baby had struck a bit deeper than usual. One voice too many in her ear, she supposed. Or perhaps her mother's ears. Temptations were everywhere.
“Look, I'm just sayin', you think I don't hear about family from my pony? It's kind of a theme in her life, when she ain't thinking about apples or chores.” Deviljack's voice was muffled, since her upper body had disappeared into the depths of the ice cream carton, her hind legs hooked onto the rim and her blonde, red arrow-tipped tail lashing about. Scraping sounds indicated she was excavating a rich brownie chunk. “She's always wonderin' if she should find herself somepony for the farm, or needin' to get away from her siblings while wantin' to be closer with 'em.”
Rarity hovered her spoon closer, in case the tiny devil pony needed help escaping from ice cream spelunking. Gifty peered over the lip, watching from her end. “And, what do you keep telling her?”
Deviljack rose back into view and hopped down from her perch, her bowl filled. “Well, I once told her she should go to Manehattan and get some independence. Y'all heard how well that went for her.”
“That was when she was still young,” Rarity observed as Deviljack munched on brownie bits. “What do you tell her now?”
“Other than 'ignore that crash from your sister's clubhouse'?” She shrugged. “I tempt her with life outside the farm, away from work, and try to get her to loosen up. She's so dedicated.” Deviljack pointed at Rarity with her spoon. “You, on the other horn, have potential. I could do great things with you. Gimme your card and we'll talk.”
Gifty snorted. “My pony's still under contract, thank you very much. No freelancing!”
Deviljack grinned. “For now. Could be changes next bargaining session, sugarcube.”
“Hmmph!” Gifty puffed out, taking her ice cream with her.
Shrugging, Deviljack tipped her horned hat to Rarity. “Jes' kidding, actually. Your Temptation'd have my flank in short order if I tried to poach you.” She looked around, ears pricked, then leaned closer. “So, word back home is that your gal'll be out of the hospital in a couple more days. Things are lookin' good and there shouldn't be any fuss gettin' her reinstated. Maybe she can even keep that fancy little bed you ordered.”
The worried knot in Rarity's chest loosened, and she sighed. “Oh, dear, that's marvellous news. I hope it hasn't been too much trouble for all of you.”
“Mmf.” Applejack's Temptation tucked a bit more brownie into her cheek. “Nah, this ain't nothing. Recording's pretty standard. It's only when halos hit the fan that it gets interestin', like that whole Discord thing five years ago. Y'all started listening to us Temptations then, didn't ya? Whoo, what a ride.” She picked up her hay fork from where it leaned against the carton. “Kinda miss that. Shame he's on track for reformin' and all.”
She popped out in a little black cloud, leaving Rarity staring at the spot where she'd been.
-~-~-~-~-~
"Bet you're glad to have your own little critter back.” The full-sized Applejack watched the swirl of activity around the small table set up on one of Rarity's display stands. “You've had a lot of them poppin' in and out on you all week.”
Yes, and during that week, she'd been granted a rare peek behind the curtain of her friend's lives. Temptations were chatty creatures by nature. It was their job to push for their pony's best interests, after all, and the notions of friendship and harmony could rub those tiny ponies the wrong way.
Fluttershy's devil was the most annoyed at her perceived failure to urge her pony to higher ambitions. Still, even she had a soft spot for animals and hated seeing them suffer. Rainbow's, on the other hoof, was every bit a speed demon as her angel and the two of them were competitive and reckless together. She still longed, somewhat contradictorily, for lazy days and more adventures rather than the rules and disciplined training of the Wonderbolts.
Applejack's Temptation was one who'd tempered her enthusiasm for a Rich and Powerful Apple Heiress. Instead, she'd settled for a pony who didn't mind seeing the world as long as the chores were through. Twilight's was yet another who had chosen good behaviour over infinite alicorn power. Now her biggest ambitions amounted to academic approval and publishing.
And the less said about Miss Temptation Pie, the better. Gifty would have fretted over Rarity's extra pounds if Pinkie's critter had kept supplying those devilish treats.
“Hope my li'l horned pest didn't give you too much trouble,” Applejack continued. “She and Angie were squabblin' something fierce the other day.”
“No, no, she was a little delight.” Rarity favoured her friend with a smile. “She just needs some attention once in a while. She adores you very much. They all do.”
Rainbow Dash and Twilight joined them. Three of their four Recorders were up at the table, along with Fluttershy's devil, a Small McIntosh Temptation, and Applejack's angel. A Lyra angel and Bon-Bon devil rounded out eight of the assumed nine board members for Ponyville. Gifty, as Rarity's Conscience, was abstaining.
“Not something you see every day,” Rainbow Dash noted, “even for us.” She looked at each blank shoulder. “Kinda weird.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Careful. If you think about it too hard, you might cause a moral quandary that makes them lose quorum.” She scribbled some notes on a hovering piece of parchment. “Rarity, this is fascinating. If I get a dedicated research project out of what we're witnessing, it could have a drastic effect on our knowledge of metaphysical psychic projections!”
“That would make your Temptation very happy,” Rarity said, glancing over her shoulder to see if Nurse Snowheart had arrived. “She did say if you listened to her more, you would be Doctor Princess Twilight Sparkle by now.”
Twilight's Temptation popped into being between them. “Seriously! I'd take a rigorously vetted academic paper right now! A turn on the lecture circuit, even.” She threw her little hooves up into the air. “Another slide presentation to the finest minds in Canterlot. Something!” She bent down in midair to narrow her eyes at Twilight's writing. “Oooh, I can work with this.”
Devilshy tapped the base of her pitchfork on the table. “No side deals allowed while the Executive is meeting, Zealous Sparkle. Save it for later.” As the mulberry alicorn grunted and swooped off, Fluttershy's Temptation set her tool back on the rack of pitchforks behind her. “Before we begin, I want to thank Miss Rarity for her generous gift of this space for our brief meeting.”
Acknowledgement rose from the various critters, then tapered off as Devilshy stood up on her hind hooves. “To the one order of business. Are our Most Honorable Recorders for Miss Rarity present?”
Gifty raised a hoof. “Conscience, present.”
“Temptation,” came a thin voice from the doorway. Heads turned from all over to see Nurse Snowheart standing there with a box in one hoof. From inside, Mine poked her head up, her violet curls smoothed down and her headband askew. She raised her bandaged foreleg. “Present.”
“Oh, hello, dear,” Rarity crooned. She refrained from scooping her Temptation from her box and cuddling her right away. Devil critters often didn't appreciate affection, which could be why they came with pointy implements. “Feeling better, my sweet?”
She nodded contritely. “Sorry for scaring you.” Noticing all the other ponies looking at her, she ducked back down with a rustle of bedding. She resurfaced with her own pitchfork clutched to her chest. “I'm fit to answer to the Board.”
Rarity gathered the box up in the blue glow of her magic. “Thank you, Miss Snowheart. Please stop by the next time there's a reception for the hospital. We can discuss an appropriate donation for your wing.” She turned towards the head table, hovering her Temptation to a landing in front of them. “Here she is.”
Devilshy nodded. “The Association welcomes you back, Honorable Temptation. Please know we fulfilled your duties in your absence. Miss Rarity accepted our scrutiny and passed with our approval. There is just one formality for us to ask. Will you continue representing the desires of her heart, until it no longer beats?”
Mine smiled, straightening her headband. “Of course I will. She's my pony, and I'm her Recorder.”
“Very well.” Devilshy looked to either side. “Do any of you wish to add anything?”
Headshakes ensued all around, followed by more straightening of headbands or halos.
“Seeing no objections, I recommend we adjourn and allow our ponies the benefit of our guidance once again. Agreed?” The other seven murmured their assent, and Fluttershy's Temptation nodded. “Adjourned then. Resume your Honorable Duties.”
Several puffs of cloud enveloped the head table. When it all cleared, only Gifty and Mine remained, the two tiny ponies embracing over the rim of the box.
Rarity released a breath she wasn't aware she was holding. She darted forward, unable to help herself. Two little shrieks echoed as she forgot her restraint and gathered up her two critters for desperately happy nuzzles, still careful of her Temptation's tender state.
“Rarityyyyy!” the two chorused.
“Hush.” She giggled, even as Mine tried to tap her on the muzzle with her pitchfork. “Let me adore you two properly, just this once.”
Yes, just this once.
-~-~-~-~-~
END
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