Discord and The Doctor

by Alondro

Rating: everyone
Tags: Discord, Crossover, Human, Doctor Whooves, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 2628

Discord is a statue again, plotting revenge. The Doctor decides that's not going to happen.

My first submission, and a warm-up tale after over a year without writing. You might call this an epilogue to a longer story I have in mind (but may never get to!).

After Discord's 3rd defeat, the evil draconequus is locked in stone once more, and lusts for revenge. However, a certain brown Earth pony stallion decided it's about time somepony put an end to that on a more permanent basis.

The Discord in my ideas tends to be more to the sadistic side when he's a total villain, more like what you'd expect from a being that enjoys the abject misery of his victims. So, yeah, he REALLY deserves this. ;3

Published 2012-07-17 21:34:03 UTC
Last updated 2012-07-17 21:34:03 UTC

Chapter 1

There had been another battle against chaos in Equestria. Marked by brutality which shocked the equine inhabitants of the peaceful land the violent confrontation with the monster Discord, a chimeric entity who claimed to be chaos embodied, claimed lives this time around. Discord’s fury at his first defeat by the Element Bearers had been on the forefront of his mind, apparently, and he’d taken great pains in an attempt to eliminate the six mares who’d stopped him previously.

He would have won if not for one stallion who felt no fear in his presence. One little pony whose eyes even the master of disharmony could not meet for long; the small brown stallion who, with a voice frigid as the void and with rage like a supernova, snarled the fateful words just before his defeat “IT IS DEFENDED!!”, had stood in his way and changed the very nature of time and space to engineer his defeat.

And now, a statue once again, Discord could do little else but reflect upon his failures, his third defeat, and the frustratingly brilliant and clever pony who’d been central to it all. Day and night he did so for years, then decades, then centuries; few ever passed by him in the lonely green labyrinth in which he stood alone, his elongated equine face curled forever in an expression of rage and disbelief, save for the Royal Sisters who’d occasionally stop by every few years for a moment or two, ensuring that the magical stone holding him was secure and un-cracked. They never spoke to him, almost never even looked in his frozen face.

Discord hated them. His hatred was all he had left. He couldn't even lose himself in the beautiful insanity of chaos. The clarity in his mind was one of the worst things about the imprisonment, in his opinion, forced by what the brown stallion had explained at some point as a 'quantum lock' to conform to a sickening semblance of order. Order, it was revolting! It made him aware of time passing, it made him 'feel' things, it allowed him to reflect upon how he'd screwed up and lost to... to a bunch of stupid, puny, garishly-colored little horses!

But the imposed order had one advantage over his native state of randomness. It allowed him to plan. And what plans he had this time! If he got free again, oh! They would pay dearly! He’d make sure to devour alive whichever ponies the Princesses loved best while they watched! He’d make it slow, tortuous, and heal them over and over just so he could rip them apart anew before finally letting them die. And as for the Princesses themselves, the evil creature had construed a thousand ideas pertaining to the eternal torments he’d subject them to, and the humiliation of forcing their former subjects to see every moment of it, whether awake or fitfully slumbering in his grand chaotic world.

But then, one brisk October day at sunrise, as the brooding statue stood facing a neatly trimmed gap in the high bushes whose leaves were just becoming tinged with fall’s colors, there appeared somepony familiar. The little brown stallion, still wearing the silly collar and ridiculous tie Discord recalled from all those years ago when last they faced each other. He wore a light, careless smile as he trotted merrily through the maze, looking this way and that until his eyes fell upon the petrified would-be god.

The pony was still alive after so long? Had he received eternal life as a reward for stopping Discord? The Princesses had never done that before. Weird, and annoying. If nothing else, this pony was always both of those things. What had the other ponies called this brown one? Dr. Hooves, was it? Stupid name, stupid ponies.

“There you are!” the unusually cheerful pony exclaimed as he turned completely toward Discord’s enclave in the royal garden’s hedge maze.

The pony strode purposefully up to the statue of Discord, pulling with his mouth from a small saddle bag at his side a singularly unusual dagger composed of a metal so perfectly formed it appeared of almost crystalline translucence with a surface so smooth it shone more brightly than a polished iridium mirror. Placing the blade on the ground for the moment, Whooves smiled cheerfully up to the statue, "Well hello there! Remember me? Oh yes, it's still me all right! You and the princesses aren't the only Ancient Ones around this little universe. I had a teensy idea in my mind about you the last time we met, something familiar in the back of my mind I just couldn't grasp. I'd seen something like you before, something that took chaos to its most evil extent and had to be ended. You call yourself the embodiment of chaos? Bah! I've seen far better! You're just a ridiculous monster."

Discord felt a disturbance in the force… no, seriously. Something was very much off about this pony. With his mind clear, he could see it now. There was more to him, an ancientness in his eyes overflowing with hidden power and wisdom. The pony possessed eyes the draconequus hadn’t seen in any other being save the Princesses’ race, of which they were the only two purebloods remaining. Even as cold as he was as a stone in the chilly autumn morn, Discord felt a greater chill pass through him as the pony’s eyes drilled through the igneous façade and into the depths of his entropic being.

The pony’s tone dropped, becoming deathly serious, a hint of menace in suddenly cold, angry eyes, "I've seen what monsters the universe can produce, Discord. I've seen the absolute ends good and evil, the light and the dark, The White and The Black. I’ve seen universes spring into being and then watched them age and die. I've seen time itself torn asunder; watched my own world, my people, fall into madness and try to eliminate the rest of the universe to elevate themselves to the status of gods. And you know what, Discord?" The simple-looking Earth Pony with the hourglass cutie mark, a pony who would typically go unnoticed by the blissfully ignorant citizenry of Equestria, leaned toward the statue and whispered his secret, "I was the one who ended them. When I finally realized how much my wanton mercy had cost, I became the stories my universe told about me. That's why I can't stop running. I have to get away from what I am, what I can do if I let myself catch up with me."

Cheerfully again, he cantered a few steps back and glanced down at the flawless blade at his hooves. "But this time, just for one little moment, I'm willing to relapse. Just for you! You should feel special! After your brief return, it finally clicked where I'd seen you before! Took a while since the place was a REAL madhouse, everything there was just WRONG! In fact, as one of the inhabitants put it, they're all mad there. And your kind live there, Discord. In that world of insanity, that little space of true chaos, that Wonderland. One of your kin was killed there, you absurd…” He paused to smirk at the statue before releasing the final word slowly, with intense meaning in his voice… “Jabberwocky."

A tremor ran through the statue, as the wicked spirit sealed within felt true terror for the first time in his indefinitely long existence. The strange knife, there was no doubt any longer as to its identity. This pony... no. He was no pony, Discord knew that much now... this creature had realized what he was, and knew how to utterly destroy him. Discord knew at last where the mysterious pony had disappeared to when he'd at last aided the Elements in re-sealing him long ago.

"Wasn't easy to get there," the pony smiled. "The TARDIS can't just up and pop on into another dimension, especially not one that barely has enough stability to maintain physical form! Seriously, that place is just ODD! Time, space, causality; nothing works in any predictable manner! Anyway, found the right rabbit hole in the looking glass and popped on in to borrow this little item, the Impossible Blade, the Vorpal Dagger. The one object of absolutely flawless order in a world composed entirely of chaos. Did you know it's the only piece of matter in which you can know the exact placement of every electron? It's true! This little old blade violates the Uncertainty Principle! It's so orderly, it actually breaks the laws of time and space itself. It's disorderly order!"

Turning his head toward Discord, his hoof raised to his ever-present bow tie. "For this deed, I really shouldn't be a Pony. They have their issues, but they're not like me, not like you. I won’t insult them by wearing their shape. For this, I need to be what I really am." His hoof pressed the center of the bow tie, and a light whirled around the little pony, concealing him for a moment. When it vanished, so had the Pony; in its place stood the imposing figure of the one called the Oncoming Storm, the Lonely God, the last Time Lord, known fondly by his friends and fearfully by his enemies as the Doctor.

His hand, possibly one of hands of Fate itself, touched the Vorpal Blade and lifted it from the dewy grass. "I usually wouldn't ever do this. Not one on one," he said softly, admiring the perfect, flawless object he turned deftly in his fingers. "But these little ponies... You know Discord, I admired a species called ‘humans’ for their tenacity and determination as a species. A funny species, humans; capable of such terrible things, and yet such wondrous things too. No matter how far they sink down, they fight and claw to raise themselves up again from the mire. I’ve defended those humans, more times that I can remember now. They’re important. They change the universe.”

The Doctor went silent for a moment, deep in the depths of his mind, reflecting, recalling, before continuing with nary an interruption from the statue, though within Discord was seething with rage and fear. “The ponies, now them I admire for something totally different. They’re SO unusual as a race. You can scarcely imagine how rare a species like them is in any universe. I admire because in their hearts, they're gentle. They're kind. I've never, ever, in all my long years seen a race that leaned so far toward goodness as a whole. It's inherent in them, and that's a rare thing. They’re a lot like the Ood, come to think of it, only the ponies keep their brains entirely inside their heads, which makes sense since they can’t exactly hold it with their hooves all the time! These ponies helped me in the same way the Ood did. They let me believe again that somewhere, there was something good, something really worth fighting for! And I wanted to stay here. Of all the places I'd been, of all the times, Equestria was so... pure, so vibrant. I felt whole for the first time in my life when I was here with that little grey mare..."

The Doctor trailed off as for a moment his angry gaze softened with an expression of lonliness and sorrow. Then his hand clenched the blade's grip tightly, "If you get out again, you'll act upon whatever wicked plans you're no doubt brooding over in there. You'll kill the Element Bearers instantly. Or maybe just one and torture the rest for years. There won't be any harmony to stop you, you'll make sure of it this time.”

Discord grudgingly had to admit, the creature really did understand his way of doing things.

“In either case,” the Doctor went on. “You won't risk being turned to stone again. You'll be like the Daleks, the Cybermen, the Sontarans, the Master, the Weeping Angels, the gods of Ragnarok, the Nightmare Child, the Could've Been King, and the Black Guardian all rolled into one big nasty ball of cruelty and anguish!" He slowly lifted the Vorpal blade until it shone before his face, a light in his eyes an observer couldn't conclusively say came from the reflection of the blade or the fires of righteous indignation from within his own ancient soul. "But that won't happen. Because I won't let it happen. Not to them. I held myself back from destroying the Daleks when they first appeared on Skaro, and I've never stopped regretting it. Because of me, countless worlds died, including my own. They came back, again and again, each time more evil, more determinted to destroy everything except for themselves! Trillions upon trillions of lives lost, because I was too afraid of myself to act! Never again, Discord. I grew from that. I learned. After so many worlds died, I finally faced the truth I’d hidden from for so long. I leaned that sometimes, there's only one way to end evil."

The statue trembled, Discord straining with every thread of his power to break free, but the bonds forged by the Elements and their Bearers was too fresh, too strong, reinforced by the power of their living Harmony to even allow a single crack in the solid stone.

The Doctor swung the Vorpal dagger, twirling it in his hand, "Been a while since I used this arm. Been a while since I had arms and hands, actually! And this arm, Discord, THIS arm?" His smile grew fierce as he swung it back, the blade seeming to light with a cold fire as if it sensed an enemy to destroy was near. "THIS is a FIGHTIN' arm!" The Oncoming Storm drove the Vorpal dagger through the stone demon's chest, the blade of impossibly perfect order cleaving both the magical prison and the evil entity's wicked immaterial heart. A silent scream of anguish and horrified disbelief flew from the statue and tore across all the lands of the Equestrian world. For a moment, the light of sun and moon dimmed, the earth quivered. And then it passed, and the light returned, brighter and more wholesome than ever before. The creatures of the world felt their breath come easier and their hearts beat lighter. Many of them found themselves inexplicably smiling and laughing, even those bitter beasts who’d never laughed before, as if a hidden terror deep inside them had suddenly vanished and they were free to live for the first time without that creeping dread in the depths of their souls.

The bright sun shone down upon the Canterlot garden, the one who ruled its movements rejoicing in her heart, bringing warmth to the cool autumn air as a distant mechanical grating faded away, taking the Doctor with it. He couldn’t stay there now, not even to enjoy the celebrations to come as his act became known and spread far and wide across the merry, magical land of Equestria. He had to keep running. He alone would pay the price for the ponies’ continued happiness.

The cheerful solar rays fell upon the statue of Discord and the blade that scored its stony chest. And though the shining Vorpal dagger gleamed brightly as ever, the statue now looked old and worn, as though it had endured ages of weathering in those few moments which passed. No longer did it hold any secret fear or power, the menace of its presence gone for eternity.

Discord was dead.

(And there was much rejoicing!) ;D

The Finishing Upness of This Story Concludes At The Period Designating the Completion of This Sentence.

PS: Now I get to be the new Lord of Chaos! Trolololo, my little ponies! Trolololo… >:}