Song of the Cebu

by Matthew Penn

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 1197

How can Pinkie Pie tell the story of the little girl and the three cebu if she doesn't know what a cebu is?

How can Pinkie Pie tell the story of the little girl and the three cebu if she doesn't know what a cebu is? It doesn't matter, this story is filler anyway.

Published 2017-10-03 04:40:15 UTC
Last updated 2017-10-03 04:40:15 UTC

Song of the Cebu

The Castle of Friendship held their annual Children's Day on the first weekend of May. An idea of Princess Twilight, local ponies and those outside Ponyville would come together to entertain the little ones through storytelling, music, arts and crafts, and dance. One of these ponies was none other than Pinkie Pie. She was next after a stallion presented his marionette adaptation of Hidalgo and the Magic Lamp, a popular Saddle Arabian fairy tale.

A projector stood in the middle of the room, a white screen in front, and everything was dark. Pinkie switched the projector on auto mode, then she plucked the strings on her ukulele. Princess Twilight looked on confusedly from a corner, wondering what on was she up to. The screen displayed a crude drawing of three, weird-looking bovine animals, each with distinct features.

“This is a story about a girl. A story about a little girl and her cebus. A story about a little girl and her three cebus. The little girl who had a sick cebu, a sad cebu, and a mute cebu… and also a hippo.” There was a drawing of a hippo eating bamboo.

The screen was white, it seemed several pictures were missing. The children were confused. Pinkie continued to play her ukulele, but hoped for something to happen. Finally there were pictures on the screen, but not the ones she hoped for. They were photographs of her vacation in Toropueblo. She awkwardly explained photos of her at the train station with her sister, strolling on the streets of Toro City, accidentally getting into a fight with a bull and somehow befriending the bull, along with his cousin. Or who she thought was his cousin. She didn’t know, he just sort of appeared as they took the photo.

The screen turned blank again. Pinkie played her instrument as the projector remained on auto mode. Twilight walked in front of the screen delivering an impatient look.

“What in the wide world of Equestria are you doing?”

“Telling the story of the little girl and the cebu,” answered Pinkie.

“What are cebu?”

“They’re kind of like cows… bulls… bullcows. I think Maud met one a long time ago. I kind of based the story on her.”

“Maybe you should step aside until you’re organized,” said Twilight. She tried to be as polite as possible.

The projector finally displayed one of Pinkie’s drawings of the cebus, and the show resumed. Twilight walked away, but watched from the distance, ready to stop the show if anything went wrong.

Pinkie’s hooves moved through the strings of the ukulele. An upbeat tempo filled the room, and she playfully (though awkwardly) ordered the children to sing along. And they did.

Through the song Pinkie told the story of the young girl and her cebu friends. Here was how the story went: A young girl walked through the forest and reached the river. She had no way of crossing to the other side until a trio of cebu crossed her way by boat. The little girl asked to them to help her cross, and they agreed. She got to know the three cebus a little more. The first cebu was sickly and sneezed so much, which made the little girl sit not very close to him in fear of getting sick herself. The second one had a dark cloud of melancholy hovering over him, and was prone to sobbing at any moment. The little girl asked him what was the matter, and he began to cry, not giving her an answer. The third cebu was a mute who only communicated by sign language and semaphore. The problem was that no one understood what he was trying to say, which made him frustrated. Along the way they come across a hippo eating bamboo.

The screen abruptly became blank. Pinkie kept playing music for cover, hoping the projector will show some pictures again. The music stopped and Pinkie searched the machine herself for the missing drawings.

Pinkie’s story was over flooded with questions from the children.

“What happens next?”

“Did the hippo see them?”

“Did the girl get hurt?”

“Why is the sad cebu sad?”

“Why is the sick cebu sick?”

“What is the other one trying to say?”

“Is the canoe wooden or aluminum?”

“Um… yes,” was all Pinkie could say.

Unfortunately she couldn’t find anymore of her drawings. Pinkie was sure she placed them in order in the projector. However, there were more photographs of the fun times she had with her friends and sister. A photo of her and Fluttershy with a beluga whale was shown on the screen. The next photo was of her, Maud and Rainbow Dash in Applewood, and they took a picture together with a pony dressed as a superhero. Another photo with Pinkie wearing her burlesque costume where she singlehandedly brought peace to the native buffalo and the Appleloosa settlers through her song about sharing and caring. That was when Twilight had to step in.

“Pinkie, I think it’s time for you to end this.”

“Not yet! I can finish this! I know I have the drawings in here somewhere!”

“But this whole thing makes absolutely no sense. We still have no clue what a cebu is, we don’t know if the little girl made it safely to the other side, we don’t know if the hippo is a threat or not, and you haven’t explained if the mute cebu is trying to communicate the imminent danger to the other passengers.”

“I was getting to that part!” said Pinkie. “If I can just find the drawings!”

A filly raised her hoof.

“Can’t you just sing the rest of it?”

“But the pictures is what makes the story fun,” explained Pinkie.

Twilight was getting agitated until the projector stopped and the screen was blank. The dark room was silent. Twilight was relieved when her friend decided to finally end it, but one look from Pinkie told her this was not her doing. A mysterious photograph of a family appeared. Everyone looked ahead. There was a husband, two children and their mother, but the mother’s golden hair was caught in the wind and it covered her face. The slides projected the same image, but nothing moved but the hair. The children whimpered and backed away. Twilight unplugged the projector from the wall, but it kept going. The yellow hair of the pony slowly dissolved away, little voices shrieked of what they’ve just witnessed.

Discord in clown makeup.

He climbed out of the projector screen.

“Happy Children’s Day!” he exclaimed.

Streamers and confetti rained from the ceiling and circus music. A record player materialized and played circus music. Discord performed magic tricks, illusions, rode around the room in a unicycle, and made animals out of balloons. Twilight consulted her checklist. Discord was not present as a Children’s Day performer. It didn’t matter. The children slowly grew to like him as he pretended to be a clumsy oaf. Discord’s silly performance ended with cheers from the children. Nopony ever found out what happened to the girl and the three cebus. The end of the story remains lost to this day.