Author's Note

Officers Mess, you are putting me in Spain. But the S is silent. I think. Maybe. Did I expect this? No, I did not.

wait, what's this? The Spanish Inquisition with a steel chair to finish the job!?

"That the last one?" Twilight winced as Spike drew another blade from her body.

He tossed it aside, reaching for the next one. "Nope. Thanks for dealing with that medieval knight for me by the way."

The puppeteered knight whose arms Twilight was currently lounging across gave a thumbs-up.

"Ow--no problem," Twilight echoed the knight's gesture. "How many more knives are there?"

"Five, maybe six if there's another stuck in your tail that I couldn't find."

"Oh."

...

...

AND THEN HERE COMES THE SPANISH INQUISITION WITH THE STEEL CHAIR--

Twilight screeched as the ceiling tore open to reveal a trio of humans in red with a steel chair. Because gravity is a thing that exists and must be followed (to our understanding at least), they naturally fell downward. Onto Twilight. With the steel chair.

"Ow," was all Twilight said. Again. Because alicorns are, say it with me now, surprisingly indestructable.

As for Spike, he now resides in a new dragon-shaped hole in the floor.