OH BOY

by Super Trampoline

Rating: everyone
Tags: Rainbow Dash, Random, Anthology, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1177

Rainbow Dash loves pancakes. What other things does she like? Read on to find out! Story 2 of Doubleshotober

Rainbow Dash loves pancakes. What other things does she like? Read on to find out!

Kind of a reverse of Things Rainbow Dash Doesn't Like, except nowhere near as funny or well written.

Story 2 of Doubleshotober

Published 2017-10-05 03:10:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-10-05 03:10:06 UTC

Pancakes

Every so often, Twilight Sparkle hosted brunch at her castle for her friends to enjoy. Originally it was just the other element bearers and Spike, but now Starlight Glimmer and even Discord frequently joined her.

Today, Fluttershy hummed a happy tune, and Rarity was happily chatting with Applejack about the latest in stetson styles. Pinkie Pie and Discord were planning their latest prank, and Starlight eavesdropped. Rainbow Dash though was simply fidgeting, hungrily waiting for food. After what seemed like eternity, Twilight and Spike brought out today's offering, unloading thick stacks of pancakes onto everypony's plate.

"OH BOY!" Rainbow shouted.

Author's Note

This picture was exactly what I needed.

Musical Episodes

The girls were again gathered in Twilight's castle, but this time not for brunch.

''Okay, here's the deal,'' Twilight began, ''Flim and Flam are out hawking their latest scam. I'd rather nip this in the bud before it spills into somepony almost dying like last time, so we're going to subvert their expectations. They know every versebreaker who lives within a hundred miles, but won't expect it if we ourselves gunk up their rhymes. So, whatever they're selling, at some point, one of us has to ask 'does it come in purple?"

Rainbow Dash loved versebreaking.

"OH BOY!'' she yelled.

Author's Note

Seriously go check out the versebreakers anthology; it's really creative.

Coupons

Rainbow Dash took her big sister duties seriously. Which meant sometimes doing things that bored her. Like helping Scootaloo shop for halloween decorations. And uh, hoofing the bill. It wasn't that she didn't like halloween; it's just that she was much more interested in costumes and candies and the sick rager Soarin threw every year, and less interested in helping Scootaloo shop for decorations. Especially expensive ones. "Look, at this cool mechanical spider!" Scootaloo chirped.

Dash glanced at the price tag. "No way, dudette, this thing's 65 bits!"

"But Dash, I brought a 30% off coupon!"

"OH BOY!" Rainbow exclaimed.

Author's Note

I don't care what anyone says; I loved Wild Wild West.

Semicolons

Rainbow enjoyed writing My Tiny Gecko fanfiction; the surprising part is that she actually was half-decent at it. She didn't usually use an editor; to tell the truth she barely even proofread her stories. However, due to a recent turn of events, Super Trampoline was currently editing for her; he was surprised how few corrections he was suggesting.

"I must confess, I expected these to be trash and drank a lot before coming here; I'm shocked that they aren't, and I'm especially impressed with your deft semicolons usage; I'd say this batch is ready for publishing."

"OH BOY!" Rainbow declared.

Author's Note

Yes, I know this is flagrant semicolon abuse; I'm very sorry.

Show and Tell

A young Rainbow Dash was fidgeting in her seat, eagerly awaiting her turn to present. It was show and tell day, and most the other foals were showing off lame things, like pet clouds and trophies and goldfish. She on the other hoof, had something AWESOME! A feather belonging to Speed Shredder, the coolest Wonderbolt there was! Don't ask her how she had obtained it; there was much bribery, hacking, kidnapping, thievery, police shoot outs, arson, foreign government toppling, and jaywalking involved. She couldn't wait to show it off!

"Alright class, next up is Rainbow Dash."

"OH BOY!" she squeed.

Author's Note

And also this sketchy shop called the Silk Road.

The Father of Modern Linguistics

As Rainbow matured as a writer, her interests in the craft broadened and spread into the field of linguistics. Her eyes were opened to the evolution and construction of language itself. So when the Wonderbolts visited Earth for a goodwill tour, she knew a pitstop she had to make.

On Earth, she did some research (using a crazy machine called a computer), and quickly sent a letter through the US postal system. She was thrilled to get a response giving his address and a suggested meeting time.

Noam Chomsky opened the door. "Rainbow Dash, I presume?"

"OH BOY!" Rainbow screamed.

Author's Note

Not to be confused with Slavoj Zizek, who may or may not have used to write My Little Pony Fanfiction.

DashCon

"Hey Twilight, did you hear the news, they're going to hold a convention dedicated to me!"

Twilight looked up from her book. "You mean DashCon? Sorry to burst your bubble, but the dash refers to a tumblr dashboard, not you."

Rainbow shrank. "Ahhh, shoot, I already bought my ticket."

Twilight raised her eyebrows. "It would have taken two minutes of research to find that out. Can you get a refund?"

Rainbow shook her head. "Nonrefundable."

"Huh. That's suspicious. Well, try to have fun anyway."

Rainbow jumped into the ballpit. Soon her haunches were wet and smelled.

"OH BOY!" she sighed.

Author's Note

Oops

Pregnancy

Rainbow Dash and Time Turner might have seemed like an odd combination, but nopony could deny they were deeply in love. He loved her high flying acrobatics and fierce loyalty, and she loved his devotion to his craft and to her, and his fascination with life. Plus she had gotten him into Daring Do.

After eighteen months of dating he had modified the town clock tower to propose to her, and six months later they got married in the town hall. Soon, Rainbow was pregnant.

"So are you having a filly or a colt," Pinkie asked.

"OH BOY!" Rainbow announced.

Author's Note

For better Rainbow/Turner shipping, read One of Dramatic Spoon's stories

The End of This Story

Rainbow sighed. Sure, Twilight might end up the butt of Super Trampoline's stories the most, but Rainbow seemed to be the second most frequent victim. It was time to put an end to this nonsense. She leaped off her balcony and glided across Ponyville toward Super Trampoline's house.

*Ding Dong!*

Super Trampoline opened the door. "Hiya Rainbow Dash. What brings you here?"

"Please," Rainbow pleaded, "Stop writing horrible stories about me. It's creepy and it makes me look bad."

"I'm sorry you feel that way, Rainbow, but I have good news: this is the last chapter.

"OH BOY!" Rainbow said.

Author's Note

I'm so sorry.

Sturke

Author's Note

Text spoilered for those who haven't read Austraeoh. You should read Austraeoh.

Sturke

Rainbow had done it. She had actually done it. She had penetrated the Midnight Armory and reignited the Elements of Harmony using the Harmonic Prism. Sure, the rest of the Herald was dead, along with millions of darkside inhabitants, but she had done it. She was an alicorn, her friends were corporeal again, and she had literally saved the world. Now she just needed to get back to the light side.

She heard a rumble: a massive dragon appeared on the horizon. "Yo, I'm Sturke. Cadance told me I might find you here. Need a ride?"

"OH BOY!" Rainbow interjected.