It had been a month since the Friendship Festival...and since the plethora of unfortunate and upsetting events that had taken place to interrupt what should have been a very happy day. Everypony had been, in some way, affected by what took place. The ponies that got the blunt of the impact, of course, were Twilight and all of her friends. Trust issues ran among the friends like they never had before, and though never aimed at each other, tended to be borderline paranoia after nearly being sold by someone they helped. The very strangest of cases, however, lied solely within Pinkie Pie. The pink pony had acted happy and cheerful and as peppy as ever when everything was said and done, but as time passed her odd behavior only continued to get odder, starting to become quite worrisome.
She'd been spending a lot of time inside lately, and even when she set hoof outside she seemed to avoid eye contact. No party seemed to be in planning, as well, which wouldn't seem like much if it weren't for the fact Pinkie was always planning some future party! Head down and tail wrapped around her body to cover her left cutie mark, the mare was currently strolling through ponyville. Strolling...and not bouncing. Yet another tradition of Pinkie's, suddenly broken for a seemingly unknown reason. Things were tense when she was around, and it made the ponies who knew her swell with their endless worry. She moved forward to a small stand where vegetables were being sold, and in a quiet, almost unrecognizable voice, she spoke;
"Could I have a bag of celery, please?" Pinkie asked, sliding a couple bits across to the salespony. The colt, having known Pinkie since he moved here to ponyville, offered a concerned glance before he gave her the bag she requested and watched her as she nodded her head in thanks and turned around to walk away.
Hooves thumping dully on the ground, Pinkie approached her friends, who were all waiting for her after inviting her along for a nice picnic. Usually, she'd have been ecstatic, and so when she approached with her entire demeanor resembling a deflated balloon, the other ponies raised confused expressions at each other. They'd noticed the strangeness this month, of course, being the closest to Pinkie Pie herself. They'd even talked with each other a couple times to share their mutual concern for a loved friend. And now, here she was, carrying a bag of celery and quietly kicking her hoof against the ground.
"Hey, Pinkie Pie-..." Rainbow started, flying up into the air and gliding closer to her friend with a small, forced grin on her face. She put a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder. "You ready for the picnic? I was worried this thing would be lame, so I prepared some air moves to show ya while you eat!" As she offered the idea with a chuckle, Pinkie Pie glanced at her with dull blue eyes and blinked. Her lips upturned only slightly in the softest smile, though luckily it was certainly genuine.
"That sounds nice, Dash!" Pinkie replied, peppiness sneaking back into her voice just a touch. Fluttershy smiled, nudging Rarity and muttering something in the unicorn's ear about how Pinkie's tone was promising.
"I know y'all have been waitin' to get together for another picnic for a long time, Pinkie Pie." Applejack chimed in, tilting her hat upwards only a bit. "I brought a tiny bit'a cider to sample!"
"Oh, yummy!" Pinkie's ears perked upwards. "I brought some sweets, and some celery for Fluttershy." She gestured with her muzzle to her bag of celery, turning to Fluttershy and finding herself contented when the pegasus seemed to glow happily at the prospect of being gifted the vegetable. "I really need this right now, you know...I really appreciate it!" Pinkie noted about the picnic, letting her posture fix from the slouched position it was in. "...Oh, uh, where's Twilight?"
"I'm right here." Twilight spoke from a small distance away, having just arrived. She stepped forward in between Rarity and Fluttershy with a smile and a basket. Pinkie took a small step back, but she smiled at her friend. Something was...different about it, though. It was more forced...almost porcelain in comparison to the smile she had when speaking to Applejack and Rainbow Dash earlier. Twilight noticed it in an instant. It was a little funny to her sometimes, how social cues were so much easier than they had been once upon a time when Twi barely had any friends and never went outside. Now she was the Princess of Friendship, quite literally trained in the art of social interaction and relationships with others. Her ears briefly fell back against her head, a certain kind of sadness befalling her before she shook it off for the time being and let her ears perk once more. "Er... I found the perfect place for us to have our picnic, girls!" Twilight said, turning around to start leading the group to a small field. It was rather nice...big and open, with lots of birds and butterflies, much to Fluttershy's silent delight.
"This place is beautiful, Twilight." Fluttershy whispered, sweetly putting her wing on Twilight's back. Twilight turned to give Fluttershy a small, affectionate nuzzle.
Twilight set her basket down with her teeth, before she levitated the picnic blanket within it. At the sight of the magic, Pinkie Pie's outward front instantly changed. She went back to her small, slouched state and her ears flattened. Eyes set on her horn, Pinkie didn't move until the blanket was completely set out on the grass. It remained that way off and on as Twilight took the items she had out of the basket onto the blanket. It was only when she sat down that Pinkie let out the breath she was holding. The pink pony walked over, sitting directly across from Twilight on the blanket, next to Fluttershy.
"Pinkie...are you feeling alright, darling?" Rarity asked as she sat next to Applejack and tilted her head a bit to the side. "I certainly don't mean to pry, but you've been awfully quiet lately."
"...Oh, uh..." Pinkie mused, having not expected to be questioned. She looked at Twilight, making eye contact with the alicorn before instantly darting her eyes away and to the ground. "I'm okay!"
"Uh, no offense, Pinkie, but you don't look fine." Spike pointed out, having witnessed the rather tense interaction between Twilight and Pinkie.
"I'm just a little tired, lately! All that festival stuff kept me really busy, you know!"
All of the others shared a look, every one of them looking to confirm with the others that Pinkie was being different.
"Pinkie," It was Twilight's turn to speak, now. "Something's wrong, and we all can tell. You've been locking yourself up and not talking to anypony. That just isn't like you!"
"Well, maybe it just is now...I don't know. I'm okay, though, Twilight, you don't have to worry about me." Pinkie's tone bordered on spiteful as she spoke. "Things got really kooky-crazy, is all! I've been thinking about it."
"Why do you keep-" Twilight cut herself off. She didn't know that it was a good idea to be specific about this, but it was driving her up the wall. Seeing Pinkie was so rare now, especially for her. Every time she came around the group, Pinkie would suddenly have something to do. It was infuriating, especially considering she loved her. Twilight huffed out a small breath of air, and stood up, wings fanning out slightly with her emotions swelling. "Why do you keep avoiding me??"
"Please don't stand over me like that!" Pinkie's words were instant, and instinctive. She wasn't looking at Twilight, and her pupils had gotten smaller than usual. She was staring at the ground, hooves trembling and tail puffed up even more than usual. Twilight took a step back, folding her wings against her back.
"...Pinkie..." She quietly muttered, the name tumbling from her mouth as she glanced at Spike. Spike shrugged, watching as the ponies all appeared to be trying to process what was happening. "Is this about Tempest Shadow? She's better now...you don't have to worry. And The Storm King is gone...there's nothing to be afraid of. Nopony is around that can hurt you-"
"Well what about YOU?!" Pinkie's words shot out like an arrow and pierced into Twilight, sending chills throughout her body. The words hurt, and dazed her as the pink pony stood up and let a look of utter despair wash over her eyes. "You just don't get it!! I...I have to go!!" And with that, she had turned around and begun running as fast as she could to escape the situation.
"Pinkie, wait...!" Dash called out, instantly hovering into the air, and going to rush forward after her. Twilight put a hoof on her back, getting her to stop and glance at Twilight.
"Let me, Dash. I have to figure this out...and make this right." The purple princess told them decidedly.
"...Weelll...okay, Twilight. But tell us if it gets really bad, okay? I don't like not knowing what the hay is going on!!" Rainbow exclaimed, not looking too pleased at the idea itself already. Twilight nodded in response, understanding her pegasus friend's displeasure but knowing that she had to be the one to fix this. The purple unicorn flew up into the air and flew as fast as she could to follow Pinkie from the air.
Pinkie had run into another area of the the field, her mane a bit flatter than usual and her eyes shimmering with a particular type of sadness that was impossible to truly place. She sat down, breathing heavily and finding herself becoming rather short of breath just by sitting there and existing. It was too much...existing, it seemed, was too much. Her heart raced, and her ears were completely lied down against the top of her head, and her hoof reached up to press against her chest. She tried to apply pressure, hoping that it would help her aching body somewhat, but it didn't. Pinkie's tail wrapped around her left cutie mark once more, and she hunched over as she sat, hanging her head and trying to stop the oncoming panic. Why had she said that? The pink pony felt her eyes welling up with tears, and she did nothing to stop them. Before she knew it, all that strange sickness inside of her had swelled again and her cheeks were wet with the falling droplets flowing from her eyes.
Twilight could hear Pinkie's crying from afar. The hics and sobs and deep gasps for air were unmistakable, and it broke Twilight's spirit even more than the other mare's outcry from earlier. The Princess glided down a good distance from Pinkie, understanding well enough that if she had fallen right next to her it'd just make things worse. "Pinkie Pie..."
"I'm sorry, Twilight!!" Pinkie exclaimed, falling into a lying down position with her head buried in her hooves. "I've been a no-good, un-fun, horrible friend!!" Twilight was taken aback by such a claim. She took a few hoofsteps forward, reaching out to her but putting it down. Pinkie didn't seem to be in a good place to be touched at all.
"Pinkie...you haven't been a bad friend. Something's clearly bothering you after everything that happened. You lashed out, sure...but I know there's a good reason behind it." Twilight mused quietly, hoping to comfort her. "You've been really worrying us. Please, tell me what's wrong and maybe I can-"
"Were you bluffing?" Pinkie said suddenly, looking up from her hooves and giving Twilight a look that could only be described as a sore misery. Like a sorrow that had been festering inside of her for a long time. Twilight tilted her head, one ear dropping to the side in bewilderment. "On the beach, Twilight. Were you bluffing?"
Twilight's heart dropped into her stomach. Of course Pinkie would be upset about that. She had said she didn't need friends like Pinkie...how could she have said that? "No...Celestia, no, Pinkie Pie! I never meant what I said!" She assured her, sitting down in front of her. "You're one of my favorite ponies in all of Equestria...and a truly good friend. I was speaking out of what I thought at the time was unjust accusation towards me, but I know better now." Twilight felt her cheeks heat up as she spoke. "You're so vibrant and bubbly and fun...and I love that about you. You're always smiling, even when it feels like you shouldn't be able to. Even when we're all hopeless. You smile and you make things better...and I just adore that, Pinkie."
The earth pony pushed herself up with her front hooves until she, too, was sitting up in front of Twilight. "Twi..." Her own cheeks burned hot with the onslaught of compliments. "...Thank you, very much...but that isn't what I mean." She admitted, rubbing her right foreleg.
"...Well...then..." Twilight muttered, puzzled. "...What is it, Pinkie?"
"When you yelled at me..." Pinkie started, heart pounding harder then before. Tears welled up in her eyes again. "You flared your horn at me. Why'd you do that? If I'd argued with you again, or...or if you didn't stop yourself..." Her eyes drifted to the ground. "...Would you have hit me with your magic? Would you have?"
Twilight's eyes went wide, and she fanned her wings out slightly in her surprise. Pinkie thought that she would have hurt her? Had she really flared her horn at her? Now that she searched her memory for the specific instance, she found that it was true. Sickened with herself to the point of feeling legitimately ill, Twilight stood up and took a step forward once more. "I'm...I'm so sorry, Pinkie, I didn't realize..." She uttered, moving so that she was sitting beside Pinkie instead of in front of her. Her wing reached out, gently touching Pinkie's back with her feathers. "I would never have fired at you, Pinkie. Not in a thousand moons. I was feeling cornered, and it was sort of primal, but I have more control over myself than that."
"It really scared me, Twilight." Pinkie cried softly, hiccuping and leaning lightly against the mare. "I just...when...when you're like me, and you...are impulsive and you say silly things sometimes...other ponies get the urge to flare their horns or reel their hooves back or raise their wings at you a lot. And not everypony..." She paused, closing her eyes tight. "...Not everypony has the self control that you do."
"Pinkie Pie." Twilight suddenly said, rather bluntly. Her eyes locked onto Pinkie and she leaned down to be closer to her face. "...Has anypony ever...hit you before?"
"...I..." Her words got caught in her throat, and she opened her eyes. With a whimper, she nodded, much to Twilight's dismay. The alicorn held her close with her wing, offering her nothing but gentle, affectionate contact. It took Pinkie a bit before she could find herself able to speak again; "It was a long time ago, but...I had this, um...marefriend, that got really annoyed with me sometimes. It was such a small thing and I can't believe I still think about it."
"It's okay to be upset by it, Pinkie. And it's okay to be angry about it. You deserve that right, at the very least." Twilight replied, disgusted that anyone could have ever brought themselves to hit Pinkie Pie.
"It especially hurt because..." Pinkie hesitated, unsure of whether or not she should say this. "...because I really like you, Twilight. I love you." Twilight's head perked up, and her feathers fluffed a tiny bit. She glanced at Pinkie, her eyes scanning for sincerity and could find only that.
"...I love you too, Pinkie Pie." Twilight responded in a hushed voice. "And I would never hurt you. I'm so sorry that I even gave you that thought at all. It was so, so wrong of me...and it will never happen again. You're so important to me."
"...Can we go back to the picnic?" Pinkie asked, and for the first time in a while, she gave Twilight a genuine smile. It was so Pinkie Pie, even if it wasn't exaggerated like it usually was. It was real joy, real emotion, and Twilight valued it like a secret treasure trove that she'd been searching for for eons.
"Of course we can, Pinkie."
