CHAPTER 1
It had been an eventful morning for Twilight Sparkle. Her new potion 'Zeromac', had cost her to lose Discord - her test subject - to realms unknown, and it had endangered the lives of her friends! Spike had got caught up in the melee, ending up a miniscule specimen himself, and requiring the use of Twilight's magic to get extracted from death by stomach acid! She knew she had to present her findings to the Princesses, but was feeling extremely apprehensive. Nonetheless, the Mane Six headed swiftly into Canterlot as the train steamed in. They hurriedly disembarked and ran through the city to the castle gates, where the two stationed Royal Guards opened the gates upon seeing the Princess of Friendship running towards them with her friends behind. Soon enough, the six ponies and Spike found themselves being ushered into the Throne Room where a waiting Celestia and Luna were sat in their splendid and ornate princesses' thrones. "Princess Celestia, Princess Luna! I came because I had to hand something over to you!"
"Calm down, Twilight" Celestia said assuringly. "We have plenty of time to discuss things so don't feel you need to rush!" It's not like we ever see you doing anything remotely political or assuming roles of authoritative responsibility , Rainbow thought to herself.
Once Twilight had caught her breath, the ponies sat and Twilight opened her side-satchel holding up two potions with her magic. The two sisters looked confusingly at them, whilst Twilight began: "These two potions have the uncanny and proven ability to alter the size of any object. This slimey one on the left, Zeromac, can reduce anything to a smaller size, down to about the size of a poppy seed. And this one does the opposite - almost a remedy, if you like - by increasing anything in size, limits to which are as yet unknown. I've spent months trying to perfect these potions, and it took me until only this morning that I tried them. The reason I'm showing you them now is not to brag, but rather for you to do me a favour, if you would. You see - these potions are extremely dangerous. In one day alone, we've had several ponies almost killed, crushed on, digested - the lot! This was -"
"I was practically digested!" Spike interrupted.
Twilight threw him a harsh stare and continued, "This was because I wasn't able to successfully control the potion dosage being applied, and then lost track of the experimental subjects...on top of that, Discord has made things harder by messing around as usual! I can't possibly continue to develop my research on these potions with all this having happened, and in jeopardy of happening again. Thus, I ask you to take them, lock them away, dispose of them or something, because I've proved to my friends and myself that I'm not ready to use these potions."
After this expositional spiel, the sisters looked at each other before asking if they could take a closer look at them. Promptly, their own magic took over Twilight's as they examined the curious liquids carefully. "Don't touch the liquid itself" Twilight added urgently.
"Okay Twilight Sparkle: here's our thinking" Luna began.
"We will not dispose of the work of my most faithful student, no." Celestia added.
Luna continued, "I will take these to the Royal Labs downstairs and do my best to study methods of their containment under the strictest security. Are there any substances upon which these potions are ineffective, so that they may be touched safely?"
"Not to my knowledge; I used my magic" Twilight admitted.
"Not to worry, Princess Twilight. We'll have this dealt with effectively and academically" said Celestia smoothly, before nodding to Luna who began to head off with the potions. As she did, an evil chuckle was heard from the stain-glass window of Discord, whose depiction came to life once again, pulling himself out to reveal himself in the room centre. He hadn't been seen since Twilight had tested the Zeromac on him that morning, and, after creating mischief at a visible but still small size, he had eventually disappeared beyond the eye could see, leaving the others panicked.
"Ahaha, come now Twilight Sparkle, we've had an absolutely whimsical day of fun, I'd say!" he laughed to himself, as the Mane Six frowned at him angrily.
"I would've thought you'd have had enough of tiny escapades" Rarity said sarcastically.
"Well you know what Rarity?- I had. I had but then I thought to myself how much more fun I can make for myself with these potions!" Discord reached for the potions but Luna protectively turned away.
"Discord!" Celestia called. "This matter is of no interest to you, you will leave now or suffer consequences" Rainbow Dash and Applejack looked ready to pounce on the master of mischief as he looked visibly hurt.
"Oh well fine then, apparently some people can't appreciate someone's efforts to lighten the mood" he began, appearing to turn away, before he quickly spun and snatched the potions from Luna.
"Hey!" Twilight ran towards the struggle as Applejack and Rainbow Dash launched themselves onto Discord. Twilight tried using her magic to force the potions, but in vain: the potions flew up into the air. Discord managed to shove Applejack and Dash off him as they were sent flying; the potions seemed to take forever to come back down. In these fatal seconds, Discord snapped his fingers and vanished, whilst the potions' test tubes were caught just in time by Luna. However, the Zeromac spilled out and drops of it splashed onto her, as well as Twilight and poor Rarity who stood alongside her. Within seconds the three of them had disappeared and the others all groaned as they knew all too well what had happened.
Celestia panicked however, having not seen this before. She got up and frantically walked around asking repeatedly where they had gone. "Princess Celestia, don't move; you'll crush them!" Pinkie Pie yelled. Celestia presently flapped her wings and floated up, looking innocent.
The tiny trio of ponies shook their heads as they looked at their new environment. Twilight sighed with annoyance whilst Rarity cried her eyes out. Luna, meanwhile, was impressed. "Fascinating. Twilight Sparkle, you've really outdone yourse-"
"Look out!" Twilight screamed, moving Luna out the way as a huge gold & white column came soring from above and crashed down onto the tiled floor before them. "Princess Celestia..." Twilight recognised the elaborate golden hooves of the princess as they came smashing down on the ground in a frenzy until the three were eventually caught underneath Celestia's front left hoof. The trio thought they were dead, but they had been caught in the groove of the princess' hoof. Soon enough, they found themselves hovering above the ground. "She's flying! Thank Starswirl we're safe for now until she steps down again..." Twilight said.
Luna was in a state of shock as her voice came out muffled from her sister's underhoof.: "We...mst...alert...thmm". To her horror, her magic was redundant, as Twilight apologetically explained the Zermoac appeared to affect magic, just as Discord had discovered much earlier.
Celestia, meanwhile, offered the remaining guests to afternoon tea in the next room, and using her magic she carried all five of them with her. As she sat carefully on the chair, manoeuvring her legs awkwardly under the table, she watched the ground around her chair but never thought to examine her hooves; her wings flapped back inwards, catching the trio from under her hoof. The tiny trio screamed as they were sent flying in the air and tried flapping their wings frantically, but since Rarity had no hope in hell, the two alicorns had no option but to try and hold her up as well. They looked down and watched as they fell helplessly towards a tea cart being brought in by a maid. They landed with a thunk in the open jar of sugar laid out.
"No, no, no, please no!" Rarity cried out, as the sugar granules - which were only slightly smaller than them - poured around them like sand.
"Well my sister doesn't take sugar, that eliminates one outcome..." Luna chirped hopefully, but their faces turned into frowns when they watched as the jar was slowly tilted down, and they began to slide out with a heap of sugar. They splashed into a cup of freshly-brewed tea, which wasn't exactly pleasant.
"Ugh, Canterlot Chai tea, really?" Rarity voiced her displeasure.
"We've got bigger problems, literally" Twilight replied, as she gestured up towards the holder of the tea cup: Fluttershy. The sweet and innocent animal-lover tilted the tea cup towards her mouth completely unaware, and opened wide. "Quick, grab the rim of the cup!" Twilight bellowed, as the trio did so. Rarity looked down into Fluttershy's gaping mouth, the cavernous black hole behind her uvula symbolising certain doom.
"So this is how poor Avery Ant must've felt" Rarity sadly recalled a story Fluttershy once told her of an ant she'd accidentally eaten, as the trio fought for their lives against the current.
"STOP!" Spike yelled, as all the ponies put their cups down. He climbed onto the table and began searching in each cup in turn, eagle-eyed and calling out his friends' names. "Twiiiiliiight!" Eventually he reached Fluttershy's cup, and gasped. "Twilight! Princess Luna, Rarity!" A tiny cheer came from the cup as Spike extracted them from the hot liquid. Whilst Spike and the others went to tend to the poor trio cradled in the dragon's hand, Fluttershy cried in the corner as Applejack consoled her. "I'm gonna get you guys taken care of" Spike said, "so direct me to the labs, Princess Luna". Celestia cast the same hearing-enhancement spell Twilight had used earlier that morning to allow Discord to initially communicate as he shrunk. Thus, Luna told Twilight and she relayed the path to Spike. As Spike made his way twisting and turning through the castle corridors, he kept the trio cupped in his hand and reached the labs' doors when, all of a sudden, the pathway was blocked as Discord magically appeared.
"I think you know all too well what I want, Spike" he spat menacingly.
"Enough, Discord. This isn't a game anymore" the feisty little dragon replied, attempting to swerve his way past. But Discord was not to be beaten, and he forced Spike's hands open as the three little ponies were exposed. Discord plucked one from Spike's palm and produced a novelty-sized magnifying glass to observe his catch.
"Ah Luna, so good of you to offer to assist me in my 'little' experiment" he laughed, skedaddling into the door and slamming it shut behind him, but not before sticking a sign outside saying 'Genius at work'. The sound of bolts and chains on the door followed. Spike sighed and bowed his head, but Twilight assured him.
"Don't worry, Spike, you were so brave. Let's go back to the others and get ourselves sorted out." Spike smiled meekly, and rushed back into the dining hall to join the others.
CHAPTER 2
"You're toying with things you can't possibly comprehend, Discord."
"Oh, try and establish within yourself some sort of rational adventurous streak, Princess Luna" the master of mischief retorted, as he examined the minute princess on the lab table before him. "As soon as you co-operate, you are free to leave, my little pony there" he added, summoning a vision of a pair of handcuffs evaporating in front of Luna.
Luna spoke into a loudspeaker that Discord had magically produced and placed in her vicinity. "And just what exactly is it you want?"
"Simple - all I need from you has already been concocted for me. My good friend Twilight Sparkle has seen to that. All I'm asking for is any trace or drop of the Za-Ze-Zeromac is it?- upon your person and I'm out of your way."
Luna frowned. "Why might you want that, Discord?"
"All in good time, your majesty" he replied snidely.
Luna reluctantly gestured towards a small drip of the potion oozing its way down her tail. With a magnifying glass Discord gleefully extracted it with a small pipette - which seemed like a 10-story building to the poor princess of the night - and began to analyse it excitedly, while Luna huffed as she sat helpless. "You have what you asked for, release me" the princess ordered. But Discord would not be dissuaded. He sealed the princess in a cage the size of a Smint, and began stirring a cauldron of potion of his own, having squirted most of the drop of Zeromac into it. Soon enough he picked up the pipette once more, and placing himself on the table, he injected himself with the traces of what was left of the Zeromac in it. Eventually he was stood right by the bars of Luna's cage, no bigger than her now. Luna was extremely confused. Sensing this, Discord produced two potions: one red, one purple.
"You see, Luna, as luck would have it I've been spending the past months trying to perfect my own such potions with similar effects, but it seems Twilight Sparkle has beaten me to it. She even used me as her test subject! As a result I've spent one of the most interesting days of my life - and that's saying something - looking at the world through tiny eyes from somepony else's magic! Nevertheless, I have triumphed as ever! I've even managed to allow my magic to still function through it! It was merely a case of finding that final necessary ingredient, which the princess has provided now."
"Thief" Luna called, but Discord held up a hand.
"The world of scientific research is constantly full of deceit and competition" He responded. Is it? Luna mused. Discord continued, "anyway, this red potion here will shrink us down to a size which Twilight Sparkle couldn't reach; a size which truly goes beyond what the eye can see: the size of the microscopic universe!" Luna didn't offer the applause clearly expected by Discord at this point. He huffed, "Well like it or not, you and I are going to be the first to explore this world! Now this purple potion is an improvement on Twilight Sparkle's growth potion; this potion simply returns the subject to its standard size." And without a moment's hesitation he joined Luna in the cage, held her tight and dropped the red ooze over their heads.
"Unbelievable. It's truly an outstanding spectacle" Discord and Luna observed the microscopic world now around them. Dust cells on the table surface circled them, whilst molecules in the air floated around and the cage now towered over them. Every slight breeze felt like a tornado to them. They must've been the size of half a grain of sand - absolutely miniscule.
"Discord, I have to say, this is breathtaking, this...innerspace" Luna admitted, unable to tear her eyes away. Suddenly, following a tingling sensation, Luna felt the microbes around her disappear and the cage decrease in size, until she was standing on the table. Discord was there, too, waving around the purple potion teasingly in front of her.
"Our little field trip is over, sorry!" he said patronisingly. "You and Celestia were right. This potion needs to be studied more deeply. I can only imagine the ways this power can be abused..." he chuckled to himself, clearly hiding a sinister plan.
Spike was still on his way back to the hall when he and Twilight decided to stop. "We have to help Luna, it's not right to just walk away from that" Twilight urged. He sighed as they turned back towards the lab.
Spike swung open the door and began, "Discord, we're - " But as he spoke, Discord, almost as if expecting their arrival, slammed the door shut in his face. Spike had to be careful as the tiny Twilight and Rarity still sat in his palm. "Hey! Careful!" He yelled, before barging the door down this time, and, finding a strange and tiny cage on the table, he placed the duo next to it. Luna called out to Twilight and they were happily reunited, as Luna began to reveal Discord's scheming. Discord saw this and instinctively grabbed Spike, taking the tiny trio in his other claw, and cursing Celestia, he poured the red potion dramatically over Spike, him and his claw.
"What the hell?! Why did you do that, you imbocile?!" Luna shouted, whilst the others looked around in bewilderment at this new world around them.
"I had to stop you squealing to Twilight, princess. You see, if you tell anyone of my doings, I shall throw this purple potion away once I apply it to myself and leave you in this miniature universe all to yourself. You'll accompany me if you know what's good for you"
"Your 'doings' are a little bit out-in-the-open now, wouldn't you say?" Luna scoffed, unfazed by his blackmail.
"Ahem!" Discord chuckled, "you know not, dear Luna, of my real intentions hmhmhm...." He snapped his fingers and Twilight's satchel containing her own potions floated over to him, which he was quick to strap to himself. With a smirk he headed for the doorway, leaving the others no choice but to follow him. They climbed over mountainous lumps of dirt and canyon-sized cracks in the floor for what felt like hours, until they eventually reached the doorway and out into the corridor.
Meanwhile, the gang were getting nervous where the others had got to. They had since even eaten dinner, which Celestia's staff had brought to them - a hearty vegetable casserole and sweetcorn soup with bread rolls. "I hope they come back the right size" Fluttershy chirped, only just getting over her earlier near-trauma with the tea.
"How can they not?! Twilight has the Growth Potion with her, it's just a case of them applying it and comin' back" Applejack said, although a slight quake in her voice implied she was trying to reassure herself just as much as she was the others.
"We can't afford to take any risks, it has been well over two hours they've been gone" Celestia thought aloud, "perhaps someone ought to go check"
"I'll go, princess! I can be there and back in a flash" Rainbow Dash piped, readying her wings.
"Ooooh, I love exploring creepy castle labs!" Pinkie added, and with a sigh Rainbow turned and waited for Pinkie before the two of them set off. They reached the labs and stood in the corridor outside. "That's super weird," Pinkie said, "seeing as all they had to do was apply Twilight's potion thingy just like they did when had to get Spike out of you!" she pointed at Rainbow, who did not look amused to say the least, given she had accidentally inhaled a shrunken Spike during the morning frenzy.
"Don't even remind me; I've had enough for a lifetime" the Pegasus said irritated, but Pinkie was excited, jumping around the corridor, bouncing off the walls.
"Yay! Detective Pinkie called up! This has been the most exciting day EVER!" As Pinkie spoke, she released party poppers that cracked and broke a stain-glass window pane very close to Rainbow.
"Watch it, Pinkie!"
"Look out!" Luna screamed, as giant shards of glass came smashing down towards the microscopic quintet, shards the size of mountains. "What are these?!"
"It looks like the sky above just decided to rain glass!" Spike said worryingly, as Twilight cuddled him for comfort.
"Perhaps if we climb to the top of this glassy mountain here we'll have a better view and can see where we are, and what this giant blue column is" Twilight looked up at Rainbow's immense leg that towered over them into the heavens.
"Time for a hike!" Discord said happily, magically producing mountain-climbing gear for the gang. A few minutes later, they reached the peak, with Discord planting a flag with his face on it and taking a selfie with the unamused gang. Sadly, their view was not improved by much.
Meanwhile, Rainbow and Pinkie were arguing about what could possibly have happened to the others. When Pinkie suggested they go back to have an open discussion with Celestia, Rainbow agreed and turned on her hooves to walk. "Ow!" Rainbow cried, as she lifted up her hoof slightly to reveal that she had stepped on a piece of broken glass. "Nice going 'detective Pinkie', there's one extra casualty" she remarked, displaying her cut hoof and a tiny trickle of blood.
The gang screamed as the blue-cyan column descended upon them, but instead of crushing under the pressure, the shard which they stood on simply pierced through the strange surface of the column's base. The world around them became an array of reds, and with an almighty hurl they suddenly found themselves travelling at fast speed down a large tunnel, with strange scarlet discs gushing around them. "What's happening?!" Spike screamed to the others, who were just as clueless. Their curiosity only increased when the discs around them - as well as themselves - came to an abrupt stop as what appeared to be a tiny policepony ushered another set of discs from a different tunnel. Was this some sort of motorway junction?! And surely that couldn't be another pony at this size?. As they resumed their journey, Discord appeared to be smirking to himself as he made notes on a sheet of paper.
"Discord, what have you got us into?!" Twilight belted at him, but he simply shrugged, thinking 'or who' to himself. That was when thing began to get really bizarre. The tunnel began to fill up with tiny cars and ponies, all forming a traffic queue! What WAS this place?! On closer inspection, these ponies had a surreal look to them; they were transparent and assumed the appearance of being almost gelatinous in texture. They were talking and shouting as normal, but how could they have found a way to shrink this much as well? As they listened closer, they overheard some of the conversation:
"Come on, what's the freaking hold up?"
"Typical, I got a meeting in the left kidney in 20 minutes..."
"I heard there's congestion in the aorta again"
"No, apparently there's just been an accident in the neighborhoof"
"That's the fifth time today! Put the traffic news on"
The gang were beginning to piece together a most unlikely of realities. Discord simply rubbed his hands together as they moved slowly through the traffic. Eventually Discord piped up, "Enough time-wasting, let's take a detour!" and, pulling into a side slip-road, they disappeared down another tunnel at an extraordinary pace.
"Okay Discord, enough games. What is this place?" Luna demanded.
"I know no more than you, princess. But if you use that royal little brain of yours, you might deduce that we are in somepony's BLOODSTREAM!" A gasp of final realisation struck the gang, as they passed under a sign titled 'Circulatory Line - Junction 17: Spleen & Pancreas, exit left'. The effects of gravity appeared to be non-existent everywhere the fivesome looked; road surfaces - and their users - ran all the way along the sides of each cylindrical tunnel they saw, in a kind of roller-coaster mesh of veins.
"It's not possible..." Rarity buried her head in her hooves. The tunnel continued for what felt like ages until eventually they came into an immense opening that had them looking up in awe. An enormous brain dominated the sky, as nerves and neurons came in and out of it which gave the illusion of a lightning storm overhead. Below this, an entrance to the brain resembling a building was entitled 'City Hall'. Twilight assumed charge, determined to find out what was going on. They walked towards the doors, as all around them these strange cellular ponies went about their lives. "LOOK!" Rarity gasped in horror as she pointed to a statue in the square in-front of the building: it was a statue of Rainbow Dash. Beyond puzzlement, the curious gang went up to it and saw its plaque that simply said 'Rainbow Dash: our city, the perfect specimen'. At this point Spike stopped one of the passers-by and held him tight.
"What is this place?!"
"Why, this is City Hall - everything happens here, kid!"
"What city?!"
"The glorious City of Rainbow Dash of course son, what's your problem?" And he hurried away.
Spike turned and related what he'd established to Twilight. In disbelief, the gang meandered into the building and presently demanded to see the mayor. Upon their entrance, they were surprised to see all the cellular ponies bow in respect. "It's her, the Princess of Friendship..." one of them whispered, as their request to see the mayor was immediately granted and they were escorted up into the brain in an elevator. The mayor welcomed them to his office, which was round and offered impeccable views over the area. All around were complex screens depicting various anatomical parts of the pony body, such as stomach, eyes, hoof, wings, etc.
"Princess, this is an unexpected surprise. Welcome to the City of Rainbow Dash! I'd imagine the Princess of Friendship would be eager to understand her friends better, but I never would've thought you'd go this far!"
"Mr. Mayor, we have no idea where we are and a bit of context would do us a great deal of help" Twilight replied.
"Oh, oh I see - well, hmm...put simply, you are currently inside your friend Rainbow Dash, where since her birth we the citizens have maintained the upkeep of her body from deep within! You see, we are a fully-functioning city which serves to help Rainbow in everything she does. We've stuck with her through everything, which is how we all know who you are." A long silence followed as the gang absorbed this enlightening news.
It was Spike who realised something. "Well hang on a minute - if Rainbow's 'controlled' by you all, then you'd know that I've already been inside this Pegasus today, albeit at a larger size" he pointed out, to which Rarity nodded in agreement.
The mayor frowned. "Oh that was you, was it? We had some monstrous intruders this morning and it's cost us a lot of damage and repair maintenance crews' time."
"Well I - wait, did you say 'intruders'?" The confused dragon turned to Twilight, who in turn faced a smirking Discord.
"It was you, wasn't it? What in Equestria were you doing in my friend's body?!" Twilight snarled at him, but he merely shrugged innocently. She huffed and turned back to the Mayor. "I must apologise; it was my blasted concoctions which enabled such destruction. We really didn't mean any harm - we had no idea of your city's existence and will help with anything that was done to upset the flow here" Twilight said hopefully.
The mayor smiled reassuringly, "That won't be necessary, Princess; you've done so much good for Rainbow Dash already. Things will be under control. Please feel free to explore our glorious city; you have my blessing for freedom of access."
The gang expressed their gratitude and left the office.
The first sight the quintet saw was a map showing Rainbow Dash's brain split into various official departments as if it were a mall: the large 'fears' section featured Spitfire and her parents; it seemed to be a restricted area for authorised personnel. Also on the map were a section manifesting Rainbow's subconscious desire not to disappoint her friends, a large section simply labelled 'awesomeness', a section which appeared to feature Tank and pet-care, and a significantly big section devoted to 'loyalty' - Twilight found this reassuring and nostalgic since Rainbow had displayed this virtue ever since they first met. There was also a cinema showcasing 'memories'; they sat and watched as the screen depicted the camping trip where Rainbow had comforted Scootaloo about a ghost story that frightened the young filly. When Rainbow and Scootaloo embraced in a hug, the whole cinema cheered and cried out "Rain-bow! Rain-bow!" It seemed everything Rainbow had accomplished was partly due to these citizens! It was only when they were finding their way out that a cellular filly pointed at Discord and said, "Look mummy, he looks like that great picture on the west wall!" Twilight looked at Discord with a frown, awaiting an explanation. Following signs to the brain's west wall, they found an enormous mural of Discord alright, a crude sketch but untouched by the citizens.
"I couldn't resist drawing a picture, I thought it'd be hilarious" he said for himself, almost regretful once he saw the cellular ponies walking past it with the mix of disgust and appreciation that often comes with looking at graffiti.
"I bet Rainbow would be pretty upset if she found out some of us were in here again..." Rarity thought aloud.
Spike snapped, "How do you think she'd feel knowing all of these guys are in here, never mind us?!" Twilight chuckled as the gang sat on a bench with their backs up against the squishy brain wall as they took it all in.
Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were back in the dining hall, having told the rest of the ponies the situation. "I'm so worried about them, I just can't get them off my brain" Rainbow said, rubbing her head, whilst Pinkie looked dejected at their failed mission. Celestia smiled at this and initiated a strategy discussion which quickly descended into an argument as ponies shouted at each other. Rainbow looked around nervously as shouts and insults were hurled across the table as Celestia tried to maintain order. Rainbow Dash knew the value of loyalty to her friends and was determined to help find them, but her attempts to steady the argument had proved in vain as even Celestia was growing impatient. Rainbow was herself nervous but was also fighting against showing it, so as not to appear weak; instead she found a chocolate biscuit left on the table from tea next to the central flower decoration and felt her tummy rumble.
Inside Rainbow's brain, flashing lights and klaxons warned the townsfolk that all was not right, and soon screens set up around the town square flashed the words 'Nervous attack: citizens brace for action'. Whilst the gang tried to work out what that meant, citizens began rushing around in various places, and the gang overheard one particularly puzzling conversation:
"Hey, are you gonna go to the stomach to watch the show, Cerebella?"
"Yeah of course, the last one was entertaining enough!" Cerebella replied happily.
"A few times today, not surprised."
"That's true, hopefully everything's alright..."
Rarity looked at her friends bemusedly and stopped Cerebella, who was a crisp white mare with a curly purple mane. "And just what exactly happens in the stomach at this point in time?"
"Don't you remember? Rainbow gets hungry when she's nervous"
Rarity harrumphed as she recalled all-too-well when Rainbow had been munching on popcorn when Spike had first fallen victim to the shrinking potions, as if it were a show. How ironic, she thought, that in reality her stomach really is hosting a show. Spike had then ended up inside the pegasus laughing at his misfortune. Poor Spikey. She explained her conversation to the others and they decided to follow the crowd.
CHAPTER 3
The gang had reached Rainbow's stomach. It was an extraordinary scene; her stomach, to these cellular inhabitants, was a beachside resort and harbour, with the stomach acid playing the role of the lake / sea, and a coastline formed by built-up undigested and chewed food, above which lay a boardwalk and pleasure beach. The city skyline continued beyond the boardwalk, an entire district seemingly located in this place. There was a massive shaft above - that was presumably the throat - which lay ominously quiet. The acid nearer the shore had been nullified by a large machine nearby which appeared to be draining the corrosive elements from this cordoned-off stretch of water; the remainder of the stomach was a vast lake upon which boats and yachts sat in the distance. The gang joined the crowd on the boardwalk as Rainbow's stomach walls tightened and the lake churned up slightly; promptly a siren started sounding a warning to stand back from the shoreline and leave the beach immediately.
"So, you guys can swim in the lake?" Spike asked a cellular pony nearby.
"Only in this bit nearer the shore that they clean. Otherwise we'd get broken down just like the food!" the pony replied. His cutie mark was simply an eye, and he also wore a pair of glasses. Spike could only guess where this one worked.
"What about the food? Isn't it so big that it causes tsunamis?"
"No, the stomach lifeguards are experts at wave control."
"There's a lot of food in here at the moment."
"Yeah, she's been chowing down today! Haha. I just watched the dinner show, casserole looked delicious"
"Was there this much sweetcorn in that....?"
"Shoot, no; one of Rainbow's favourite foods! Always in here, those damn kernels. Takes the Breakdown team ages on those"
At this point the sound of chewing could be heard from above and the citizens hushed with excitement. Presently a massive brown lump came flying down and splashed into the acid, causing a wave that luckily died down by the time it reached the beach. A few boats in the distance set off a few fireworks in celebration as it rose almost triumphantly to the surface. The Breakdown team instantly launched off in boats with all kinds of gear for breaking it apart. Discord turned his head and saw a large information board on the stomach wall which he told the others to look at. It seemed that the stomach was like an internal travel hub: the board displayed 'Arrivals' - under which 'biscuit' and 'pollen' were written - and 'Departures' - which showed 'casserole', 'sugar: connecting journeys to insulin central and Circulatory Line', 'popcorn' - and more interestingly - 'unidentified objects: disclaimer'. Discord deduced these 'objects' must've been him and Spike earlier that morning. "Fascinating..." he exclaimed, again making notes. As the crowd began to filter away after the board announced 'Attack averted: stay cool, citizens', it was then that he noticed a rather unpleasant-looking mark on the far-side stomach wall near a large gate labelled 'Small Intestine Toll, Route 101'. He stopped a passing policepony whose badge bore the initials RDPD and inquired, "Pardon me officer, but what exactly is that delightfully nasty-looking thing on the wall over there?"
The officer shrugged. "Oh, we've had a lotta trouble with that recently. Damn cider, it's so acidic that it corrodes even our city's stomach walls! Ours! Rainbow Dash certainly has more guts than anypony, but we make sure they're the best too - but she can't get enough of that cider!" Even as he spoke, Discord squinted and saw a construction team with scaffolding set up along the wall where they were applying various substances to the staining.
Twilight was confused and asked the policepony her own question now. "Don't you recognise these guys?! They were in this place earlier today!"
The officer frowned, "We had some abnormally large visitors come in and cause a horrible storm in here earlier; Rainbow Dash got a stomach ache because of it! That was you?!" He looked disappointed as Spike bowed his head and Discord avoided eye contact. "Oh well. Strange times indeed this morning. I just wonder how you did it at this size," and he walked off.
Discord walked up to Spike ominously. "You haven't told, anypony have you?"
Spike sighed, "no Discord. Nopony ever has to know, honestly."
"Good!" the draconequus exclaimed. He then turned very serious. "We had a deal, remember. Don't you dare break it."
The gang looked around at what was happening around them. A massive group of tourist cells was being ushered down a tunnel from a building labelled 'Liver Tours'. A large screen on the side of a boardwalk building - which proudly displayed a neon sign 'The Churner Hotel' - seemed to be depicting Rainbow Dash's own eyes and hence what she saw, and the screen was labelled 'RainbowVision'. Incidentally a small park was filled with spectators watching the screen like an outdoor cinema. A group of workers suddenly ran past the gang, wearing uniforms branded 'Mouth Sanitation Department' - they appeared in an urgent hurry as they boarded a helicopter that presently set off up the throat. "Hmmm, that could be interesting" Twilight suggested, as she spoke to the helicopter groundcrew about the Mayor's blessing and the pilot presently spoke into his radio:
"Get me a chopper to the mouth, beachside in 5 minutes" The gang waited until the helicopter came, which bore the striped livery of Rainbow Dash's mane running along its side and a logo of an open mouth with 'RD-MSD' inside. As they all sat in uncomfortable silence, they watched as the beach below became smaller as they eventually rose up Rainbow's throat. They passed by a turning-off that Spike had spotted earlier that morning when Rainbow had unintentionally swallowed him, a turning to the lungs labelled 'Route 1: Exit 2 Lungs via Windpipe'. He had found it out-of-place then, a tiny little sign which he thought his mind was playing a trick on him with; it now seemed so insignificant among all else that went on in this most unusual habitat. At this point the pilot spoke up.
"Any of you folks been up to mouth county before?" They all shook their heads but Spike and Discord exchanged glances. They didn't want to incur the wrath of any more workers, so remained quiet. "Basically it's a dangerous environment; we only send experienced cells here and it's generally off-limits to the public. It's our strictest border; not much gets through unnoticed. All entering organisms have to report to border control in here, but luckily for you we have a report of inactivity for the next 15 minutes. We have one public observation platform, on the base of the uvula, which is where I'll drop you off with a colleague of mine, but first I'll show you around." He then pointed out Rainbow's vocal chords as they soared over them; the gang looked out the windows curiously, thinking of all the pegasus' great quotes that had come from these mighty sound generators. Eventually the helicopter rose to the back of Rainbow Dash's throat: it was a sight Spike didn't think he'd see again, but it nevertheless remained a cool concept to him to be inside his sporty friend. The chopper flew past the tonsils as the pilot continued, "the DAA - that's the Dashies Antibodies Army - recently won a battle against the pyogenes bacteria that had tried to cause tonsillitis here, but we got 'em good!" He laughed to himself and headed towards the teeth at the front of the mouth. Here Spike and Discord recognised what they had both seen before - the various cracks and general uncleanliness of Rainbow's teeth, and, sensing this, the pilot explained how the Dental Hygiene Unit (DHU) had been depleted following a strike due to City Hall's neglect to have her brush her teeth before bedtime. "City Hall say dental hygiene is 'so not cool', hence the evident underfunding." As he spoke, the chopper flew close to a molar which had a cave in its gumline, marked outside 'Danger: open cavity'. It was being guarded by two policeponies in conversation with a member of the DHU. As they flew close to the competitive pegasus' neatly-aligned but slightly unkempt teeth, they noticed crumbs and popcorn shavings wedged between them; DHU workers were trying to pry them out with massive sticks and various tools. The pilot flew low over the tongue with its mountainous taste-buds and flew back towards the tonsils, passing the immense water reservoirs a.k.a. salivary glands, then rising to the uvula from behind. There was a small walkway to the uvula's interior which the gang crossed after thanking the pilot, but being exposed to the mouth's interior at microscopic size meant they picked up on every scent molecule in there, to which Rarity almost gagged at once the smell of apples mixed with casserole wafted up. Once inside the uvula, they were greeted by an MSD officer who escorted them into an elevator. They descended to the bottom level and the door opened to reveal a round observation platform, literally forming the base of Rainbow Dash's uvula. There was even a see-through floor in one place where they saw evidence of adaptation for the dark environment: a flashing red beacon light at the base of the uvula warned incoming traffic, and also the vast hole of the throat below had 'streetlights' along the sides in places. Twilight wondered if the red light was ever visible from the outside world. A weary-eyed cellular pony came and introduced herself as the Head of Department, and invited them to look around. All of a sudden, construction crew on scaffolding outside made themselves heard when they cursed loudly and shouted at each other; Luna went to the floor-to-ceiling glass window and asked them what the problem was.
"It's this damn graffiti - some schmuck thought it'd be funny to spray this stuff at an unbearably large size."
"What does it say?" Luna asked.
"We had to look from a distance to read it fully. 'Discord was here'. Frankly, 'Dis-cord' can get bent. This ink just won't come off! The Pegasus herself even noticed it..."
Luna turned to Discord with a furious stare. "You go out and you help those poor cells, Discord. Now." The workers couldn't hear the conversation inside, but they watched as a strange draconequus creature appeared to be being equipped to join them outside. Eventually that's exactly what happened. In his helmet and cleaning uniform Discord didn't say a word in response to the MSD workers' many questions that followed, but simply scrubbed in silence with an annoyed face behind his visor. Rarity couldn't help but chuckle. The ponies and Spike decided to leave Discord to his punishment whilst they went off to explore further. From the uvula they boarded the Nervous Line transit system and headed to the wings, changing onto the Muscular Line.
As they disembarked in a plaza there was a station map of Rainbow Dash's entire body outline showing the various transit systems and a 'You are here' indicated at the wingbase. The plaza before them was like some kind of downtown hub, but its sky was dominated by the massive muscles and wing bones. The supracoracoideus muscle swept over their heads and towards the lightweight bones upon which the feathered wings depended. Twilight and Luna were in awe as they looked at their own wings, marvelling at how they anatomically worked first-hoof. I wonder if Rainbow knows the exact biology of these things that have made her such a successful flyer... and, ultimately, Wonderbolt? Twilight thought of her friend. There was a museum to one side, the 'Daring Do Adventurers' Exhibition' attracting a large queue of cellular ponies, and opposite was an attraction called 'Rainbow Dash: Wonderbolt Legend's Walk of Fame'. This appeared to be a walk-through showcasing various accomplishments of Rainbow Dash's illustrious flying career. Funnily enough, there were even signs to a flying squadron barracks in here. Naturally there were tons of citizens and visitors around the plaza, taking pictures and queuing up. There were numerous gyms and fitness centres and a statue at its centre, this one showing a pair of wings with Rainbow's cutie mark imprinted on them. Its plaque said: "City of Rainbow Dash: Proud Creators of the Sonic Rainboom'. The gang opted for a behind-the-scenes wings tour exclusively given to them at the Mayor's request - they were, after all, this city's crowning achievement - offered by specialist muscle-expert cells: these guys were hench themselves. "Our beauties", one began, kissing Rainbow's immense muscle beside him. "We've worked extra hard on operating these babies; ever since her birth we've had an academy for fitness cells like us to ensure these things exceed expectations." They walked past a framed picture hung up on the side showing these fitness cells with many others like them, all sharing drinks at a party where a banner above them showed that it was commemorating 'RD First Sonic Rainboom' followed by the year it happened. The cells became teary-eyed with pride and joy as the gang stopped to look at it. "Moving on", they said, continuing the tour and shaking their emotional moment away.
Meanwhile, back in the mouth, Discord had managed to shake off the two MSD workers during a scuffle, and laughed to himself as he simply re-wrote his graffiti onto unsuspecting Rainbow's uvula. They'll get what they deserve for abandoning me. He chuckled as he firstly chucked his graffiti cans down the gaping throat aggressively, and then pulled out his notes and planned his next move.
Rainbow Dash sat at the table and spluttered as she felt a strange taste of ink in her mouth, whilst she conversed with the group at the table, completely unaware.
Author's Note
There was significant influence from the numerous 'Fantastic Voyage'-style films that exist out there, but this one hopefully keeps a distinctly-MLP feel to it! Lot of fun to write and a personal favourite story arc of mine. Please leave a thumbs-up or comment!
CHAPTER 4
Discord's trip up to the front of Rainbow Dash's mouth was a long and dangerous trek as he made his way through the taste bud forest that resided on her tongue. The journey wasn't as easy as he thought; coughs occasionally erupted from Rainbow's throat caused by the spray paint cans he threw down there earlier. Miraculously, he reached the edge of the taste bud forest and gazed up at the wall of huge teeth which blocked his way outside. To the left of him was what appeared to be an abandoned toll booth with a sign which read 'Currently on Tongue Forest patrol/picnic. Return time 6:00'. "Perfect," Discord said in a snide way, "This will be my chance to escape."
Outside, the ponies were discussing the state of affairs. It had been a while since Spike went to go find the other ponies. The castle is huge after all, maybe Spike had got lost? This long wait was starting to get on everypony's nerves, and Rainbow's continuous coughing wasn't helping the mood. "You okay, Dashie?" Pinkie asked as Rainbow wiped a tear from her eye. "You've been coughing for a reeeaaaally long time now."
Rainbow cleared her throat, "Oh it's nothing Pinks - bit of biscuit might have gone down the wrong pipe." She massaged her neck with her hoof.
Celestia kept checking the clock on the wall behind her. "This is taking an incredibly long time. Surely Spike wouldn't have spent this much time trying to find the lab? There are royal guards all over the place to point out where to go." This seemed to have put stress on the poor little ponies, especially Fluttershy.
"W-what if something dangerous has happened to him? Discord is still somewhere out there, and after what happened earlier he could still be causing mischief" she said apprehensively.
Rainbow placed a hoof to her temple. "I knew we should've turned him back to stone when we totally had the chance! He's caused nothing but trouble since he got 'reformed'", she remarked sarcastically.
Fluttershy shot a glance over to Rainbow. "I know Discord might be a pain sometimes, Rainbow Dash, but he's still learning. He just doesn't know when to stop when he gets going like this. If I had spoken up to him when I had the chance, I -" stopping, she planted her face in her hooves and sighed. "....why am I such a coward under pressure?" She muffled out as Applejack went to support her.
Celestia began to look impatient. "We should dispatch a search party to find them."
Pinkie perked her head up at these words. "OHOHOH! Me and Fluttershy can go look!" She reached over and pulled Fluttershy's head out of her hooves and shook it in a "yes" formation.
"Very well," Celestia chimed, "but if we don't hear back from you two in an hour, I will send an expert search team."
"Okie dokey!" Pinkie took Fluttershy's hoof and headed toward the door, before stopping suddenly. "Waaaait a minute. What do you mean you'll send an 'expert' search team? Are you trying to say we aren't experts?"
Celestia sighed and said with a soothing smile, "If you come back here in time, we'll throw you a party tonight in the Gala hall." Pinkie's eyes lightened up and she zipped out of the door with Fluttershy without another word. A giggle escaped from Celestia's lips, "That friend of yours will accomplish anything if parties are involved."
Discord tried to ignore Rainbow's comments on turning him back to stone that were emanating from the recesses of her throat, as he was finishing his escapade up her mountainous side tooth. Once he made it to the top, he looked through Rainbow's open-hanging mouth and took in the huge landscape of the tea table where she was situated. His sights set on the monumentally-sized Celestia that resided across the table. "I must move quickly, before Rainbow decides to slam down her chompers." Discord peered up as he gazed at Rainbow's upper teeth which took up his entire sky. Another cough erupted from the flyer's throat and continuously echoed throughout her mouth. Discord observed the huge landscape of Rainbow's maw, which to him covered hundreds of miles. Gigantic globs of saliva dripped down from the roof of Rainbow's mouth and splashed down onto the tongue, spreading the drool all along the sides of her molars. As her massive tongue rose with each breath, Discord turned his eyes upon the uvula, which swayed back and forth with every cough and breath that Rainbow took. This gave him an idea. He took his claw, rearranged his thumb and forefinger into the shape of a weapon, and aimed straight at the throat. "Might as well exit in style!" Discord proclaimed as a huge beam of energy shot out from the tip of his finger and blasted its way towards the throat.
The MSD in the uvula observation centre were focusing hard on their work keeping the mouth clean: sending out workers to clear out the throat of any harmful intruders that might be causing the coughs, producing saliva in the salivary glands and most importantly, clearing that graffiti off from the observation window. Oovla, the tired Head of the MSD, stood by a window looking out over all that her team were responsible for. She'd been in this role for what felt like decades now, and the team she now had assembled at her disposal were none the wiser to the immense devotion and dedication she'd given to rebuilding the MSD's tarnished reputation. She headed to her chair and sat down wearily. "Any word on when the clean-up team will be done cleaning that infernal window?" She spoke down to her chancellors in her boardroom on one of the upper floors within the uvula. "It's currently blocking the view down to the back left molar, and I swear I saw some cracks and dents in it the other day. And where is that 'Desk Ward' fellow who was supposed to be helping with the clean-up?"
Chancellor Danid spoke up , "Ma'am, we have more pressing matters to attend to than maintaining mouth upkeep. The clean-up team from outside reported that they have lost Dis-cord."
"What!?" Oovla kicked back from her chair and strode briskly towards the window. "How could you just 'lose' him? What do I even pay you all for!?"
A worker drone turned his head up towards Oovla, "Actually ma'am, you don't pay us at all. We don't even have a stable economy."
Oovla stared him down and resumed her gaze out the window. "Send out a search party. He couldn't have gone far." She squinted out towards the entrance of the mouth, as her eyes focused on a particularly bright light in the centre of her view. "Ugh, how many times have I asked you all to stop playing with those laser pointers?"
Danid replied, "Ma'am, we have had all laser pointers confiscated after what happened to Jerry a few weeks ago." He removed his hat and placed it towards his chest, "Poor guy, he was a few days from retirement."
Oovla turned her head, "Really? Then what on earth -" She cut herself off, as the bright light she was focusing on seemed to have grown more in size. The light was growing as much as Oovla's eyes were widening. "EVERYPONY GET DOWN!" She made for a duck-and-cover as the entirety of the MSD followed suit. All Oovla could see was her view of the bright light approaching the window with an incredible speed, before it hit.
A coughing fit erupted out of Rainbow as she slammed her hooves down on the table. She coughed as hard as ever, right in front of a disgruntled Celestia no less. Applejack patted her hoof on Rainbow's back but exclaimed, "For Heaven's sake girl, cover your mouth! Y'all might not be sick, but don't be spreading your darn germs everywhere!"
Celestia looked across from the table towards Rainbow, "Rainbow Dash, do you need any medical assistance? Sounds like you have a pretty nasty cough."
Rainbow took a swig of the tea next to her and finished with a sigh, "I told you, something totally just went down wrong! Geez, felt like something scratched up my throat."
"That don't sound like a typical case of the sassafrasin' coughs!" Applejack approached her, feeling suspicious, "Mind if I have a look?"
"No, I'm fine!" Rainbow injected, "Let's just keep waiting. Besides, my throat feels tons better. Whatever was down there, I must've just hacked it out."
And boy was it hacked out, alright. Hacked out at approximately 300 MPH. Discord flew through the air with a gleeful smile as his trajectory sent him crashing back down onto the table. He shook his body back up and dusted himself off, admiring his surroundings. Nearby was a giant saucer, the huge rim of it like a planet's rings above his tiny head. A cup sat upon this saucer, and it stretched up beyond his eyes could see. A large blue hoof was resting on the table nearby, and Discord could smell the fragrant apples of Applejack too. He began to manoeuvre himself towards Celestia, as he produced from Twilight's satchel his notes as well as a map of Celestia's outline.
CHAPTER 5
Smoke and ash filled the observation deck. The MSD had felt a jolt that they'd never experienced before in their lives. Every cell lay on the ground, some motionless; some were in a state on the floor after the huge burst of energy that had just hit Rainbow's uvula. Out of a pile of rubble that had been sensor panels, the gelatinous hoof of Oovla burst out as she pulled herself from the wreckage, spluttering. "Danid!" she called out, "Status report - immediately!" A smaller hoof popped out from the other side of the room as Chancellor Danid pulled himself out of the rubble and surveyed the damage.
"We seem to have suffered multiple casualties due to the blast. Thankfully, no pony seems to have suffered from Death's hand.” Danid focused on the ground near him and picked up his glasses. “Do you suppose that Discord may have been behind this?”
Oovla let out a noise of concern. “He does seem like the kind of ruffian who would cause such a thing. Send all the wounded to sick bay in the Nervous System Medical Centre. I certainly don’t want any more injuries on my watch.”
"Ma'am!" Two globponies, one injured, raced up to Oovla. "We have news to report!"
Oovla rubbed her temple, "Yes, we know...we've been attacked. Just look around you! Send your comrade up to the Nervous System; he'll be taken care of there." She walked over to her toppled wingback chair - stylised as Rainbow Dash's wings, of course - and set it upright.
"N-No ma'am...we were with the re-con team that was put in charge of supervising Discord's clean-up duty to prevent his escape. However, a Ger-globin attacked us and forced us into the taste buds forest, where we split up. The Gerglobin was terminated, but once I found Johnson here - with this deep gash in his foreleg - we raced straight up here." Johnson let out a gasp of pain in addition.
Oovla sat down, "Well...mind telling me where this Discord is now?" her eye twitched, "I expect that my finest men here managed to keep an eye on him despite this setback."
"Tha- that's just what we came up here to tell you ma'am. We actually lost sight of him during the attack." This was quickly met by a slap from Oovla.
"IDIOTS! I specifically put you two in charge as the highest ranks in my re-con team. How could you two fail me like this?!"
Johnson let out another grunt of pain, "M-Ma'am, the Gerglobin was too fierce. We couldn't keep watch of Discord after we were already split up in the forest. He could be anywhere..."
Oovla sighed. "Danid, send Johnson up to the medical bay, and take Tracy here down to Respiratory for questioning." Danid followed suit and placed both his hooves on the glob ponies shoulders, calling for a helicopter into his phone.
"M-Ma'am I told you all there is to know!" Tracy's protests were drowned out as he and Johnson were led out of the main observation room.
"Drat, he's right. Discord could literally be anywhere. TOBY!" Oovla yelled out to the command centre, "Is the relay screen still functional?"
"Yes it is," Toby replied, "we should have full view of the mouth in a few seconds." After a series of beeps and boops, the relay screen turned back on. But instead of it supplying an overlooking view of the mouth, everyone in the room was met with a familiar face laughing mockingly.
"Well..." Oovla's eye twitched again, "at least that confirms our suspicions of who caused this attack." She groaned as technicians got to work hurriedly rewiring the malfunctioning screen system.
Princess Celestia towered over the microscopic master of mischief.
Discord had been taking notes all day during his explorations inside Rainbow Dash, and he intended to use his recordings to help him in his goal: conquering of Celestia. His mischievous side had won out again, and he was determined to see if he could conquer whatever lay inside the unsuspecting princess' innards. Nopony will find me, even though they'll suspect it's all my doings! This is GENious! Spike had better keep quiet.... Unfurling his notes, he proceeded to flap his mismatched wings and took off from the table surface. It was at this moment that he heard his favourite voice besides his own.
"He would never do something like that, Rainbow Dash! Princess Celestia, you mustn't condone his behaviour!" Fluttershy spoke adamantly to the table, having returned unsuccessfully with Pinkie. Unbeknownst to her, her defendant was witnessing it all from right under her nose. "Discord is my friend, and if you give him a chance, he'll be yours too!" Celestia smiled warmly at this, but Rainbow stuck her tongue out in disgust.
Tears welled up in Discord's eyes, in spite of himself, and he flew softly back down onto a flower petal on the tabletop. I can't possibly advocate the plans I have in mind when there's somepony on this planet whose view of me is such as that. What am I to do? He was torn, furious at himself for letting even the slightest portion of considerate essence establish a conscience in his mind, but after thinking to himself how he could right his wrongs, it suddenly came to him. Firstly, though, I've got to cooperate.
Princess Cadence had joined the group sat in the Canterlot dining hall, explaining that her search parties were on standby. What with Spike's prolonged absence and Rainbow's persistent cough, it was no wonder that the blame was aimed at the truant Discord. "I'm almost certain Discord's responsible for your cough, Dash, as well as everything else" Applejack said, turning her attention to unsuspecting Rainbow Dash. She then laughed, "y'all are more outta control than Buckaroo on a mechanical bull."
Rainbow groaned. "Ugh, this totally seems like his kind of idea for a joke"
As if on cue, Discord appeared in the room. "Ahoho" he laughed, "who isn't ever in the mood for a joke, Rainbow Dash?"
"Discord! Where have you been?" Celestia demanded, as the other ponies frowned at him.
"My dear Celestia, I've been closer than you can possibly imagine. I could never wander too far from my bestest pony friend in Equestria." He shot a smile at Fluttershy, who returned one. "Ahem. I have, however, formulated a solution to our small issue - if you'll pardon the pun".
Pinkie Pie jumped excitedly: "Ooooh tell us, tell us!" The two princesses nodded in agreement.
"Okay, it's very simple" Discord began, "for you see, I know exactly where our pony friends have gone. To get them back, all I have to do is - " Before he'd even finished his sentence, he clicked his fingers and no sooner had he done so than he had vanished right before the eyes of all the disgruntled ponies there.
"What a creep! He totally ditches again when we're counting on him!" Rainbow screamed, as Fluttershy simply shook her head.
Discord was back down to microscopic size having teleported back to the lab and picked up samples of his potions which he slipped into Twilight's satchel. He had left so abruptly because he knew what he had to do; he'd thought over it long enough after abandoning his Celestial takover. I need to re-enter Rainbow Dash's body and convene with the others; I must show them how sorry I am...I'll clean up after the mess I've left, and I'll show them how good a friend I can be - like Fluttershy believes - by helping to improve Rainbow! Who knows, maybe I could become a real hero in that city... He couldn't have told this plan to the ponies in the hall; it could've compromised the entire mission, especially given Rainbow's apprehension to the whole notion that Twilight's potions had put forward. To aid his quest, and in the event that his magic should fail him, he'd protected his wings from the potion by encasing them in an anti-Zeromac substance he'd tested for his own potion. Thus, he was able to fly back up towards Rainbow at a much faster pace.
CHAPTER 6
Twilight, Spike, Rarity and Luna were enjoying their generous tour of the city. After their exclusive trip to the wings, they were shown a Dashies Antibody Army barracks stationed in one of her wing muscles, where many training exercises and drills were taking place. Then they had visited the upmarket district of the city: Neck Hill. This swanky neighbourhood was essentially constructed all along the inside of the back of Rainbow's neck and spine, and many famous cells from the city lived there: it was like Applewood Hills in Las Pegasus! The zero-gravity was still bewildering to them, as buildings stretched high up the sides of every wall, and in some larger veins and spaces, skyscrapers dangled like stalactites way above their heads. They had also gone back to Southside to see the area which they had first entered when the shard of ice pierced Rainbow's hoof; construction teams, policeponies and DAA troops had all been dispatched to oversee an efficient clean-up as blood had poured out and various illegal germigrants had attempted to come in - It was all like a border control, the gang thought. Rainbow had apparently put a bandage on her hoof, after a message from City Hall had told the muscle department of this leg to avoiding walking on it (this seemed unnecessary since Rainbow Dash always flaps her wings instead anyway). In this incredible microcity, the cellular ponies travelled around best by the Nervous, Muscular and Circulatory transit systems. The gang had now travelled on each line, but the Circulatory was by far the most busy of the heavily-advertised Rainbow Dash Transit Authority ("no better way to travel"). Ponies were rushing around the red-and-blue stations and cars beeped as if it were Grand Central Station in Manehattan! This route actually served both cars and subway trains, meaning there was double the congestion! Each line always went up to the brain though, and eventually the gang returned there. First they sat in the cinema to watch another daydream, this time showing Rainbow coming second in a flying race, with her parents cheering overly-enthusiastically. It was strange to see that all the audience of ponies reacted just as Rainbow had: they all groaned and muttered how embarrassing it was! Interesting, they really do all have a say in how she behaves, Twilight thought. Eventually the gang strolled through the hallways of City Hall to the Mayor's office. It was a swooping room which overlooked this hub of activity in the city, Brain Central.
"Mr. Mayor, it's truly inspired. We're so grateful for you letting us roam around freely!"
"But of course! You, all of you, have helped Rainbow transform into the heroic and awesome pony she is today" he replied. Just as he offered to shake hoof, his phone rang and one of the over-hanging monitors outlining Rainbow's head side-on flashed a red light on her nose area. "What is it, Marjorie?"
"Sir, there's a build-up in Nasal Route 2, and news reports are that it seems to be due to that creature from earlier"
"So send some RDPD there to clear it up"
"They're already there, Sir. He was caught sticking up posters of himself, and 'Lost' posters asking for the very guests I believe you've just greeted"
"Fine, fine - send a car for him, Marjorie, and- "
"That won't be necessary, Mr Mayor" Twilight interjected, "he'll just cause even more trouble in here. We'll go to him."
The Mayor nodded and arranged the car to take the gang to the nose. They sat as they made their way through twists and turns, traffic-filled tunnels and overpasses through Rainbow's internal maze of veins and nerves. "Oh, good - I didn't get enough of Rainbow Dash's snot all over me earlier" Spike said sarcastically, remembering his morning's unpleasant venture whilst the car radio churned out traffic updates. Once again they passed a RainbowVision screen, although Luna pointed out that they must be near Rainbow's eyes based on their journey's route. Indeed, their driver confirmed that they were in 'Optical Borough', and sure enough they all briefly glimpsed a sight of one of the giantess' eyes at the far end of the major thoroughfare which was the Optic Nerve. Through this eye - besides the RainowVision - they could make out what was going on outside. Rainbow Dash was sitting at the dining table still it would seem, with Celestia sat opposite, looking distressed. Speakers dotted across the Optic Nerve Boulevard blared out the conversation the ponies were having, with Celestia and Fluttershy's panicked comments; whenever Rainbow said anything the spectators would cheer. It was all just so incredible, the gang thought. Besides this tourist attraction of the eyes - with its governmental operating factories and buildings, the borough seemed to serve as the city's financial district. The carload observed a blink in awe: the whole area was plunged into momentary darkness and not one citizen reacted to such a phenomenon. This gave Twilight an idea.
"We should try and contact them out there; they're all getting so worried about us."
"How do you propose we communicate with them from in here?" Luna asked.
"I'll need to ask the Mayor for permission, but perhaps we could force Rainbow to blink in Morse code...Princess Celestia would certainly decipher it." Twilight replied, to which Luna nodded. Through the traffic they passed the borough's Central Library, much to their surprise.
"Rainbow Dash says books are for eggheads" Rarity complained, but Twilight smiled broadly.
"Not every book" she replied, remembering how she had introduced Rainbow to the Daring Do series. She ordered the car to pull over - met by a groan from the guys - and ran in; sure enough, the vast majority of books available were Daring Do issues. Citizens were queuing and discussing excitedly about various stories - just as Rainbow would - and some younger cellular ponies even wore costumes or props of their hero. Hmm, Twilight thought. What I really need is a magic section. She spotted a horned librarian and asked her how she worked her magic from it.
"Oh we have a very special form of magic here, Princess. I believe you have to be a citizen to possess it" the librarian explained, as Twilight groaned. The librarian opened her computer's database. "There's a book on it, which may be of help to you. Lt me see...Aisle L, R17.34w." Twilight thanked her and presently checked out the book, 'Rainbow Dash: A Magical History' . Racing back into the car of impatient friends, she preoccupied herself with a quick read.
Eventually they reached the Nasal District, and proceeded to enter Passage 2, which was definitely the more congested. A sign warned "Danger: Booger Dam construction work scheduled - expect delays". Dominating the view was the dam itself: a leviathan of pioneering achievement, tall and proud, sealing off the upper nostril's passage as it headed inwards to its grim storage reservoirs. The driver pulled up and the foursome got out to find a scene of chaos, policeponies blowing whistles, drivers shouting at each other, and there in the middle...was Discord. On the one hand, they were happy to see him after a while, but on the other they were irritated further. "Discord! Can you venture anywhere without causing chaos like this?!" Luna barked.
"Oooh, goodie" Discord exclaimed as he ran to hug his companions. Marjorie had been right; scattered around there lay posters of them with 'Lost' above their faces, captioned 'please contact Discord if found'. More bizzare were the posters of himself, political Obama-style posters saying things like 'Hope' and 'Time for change'.
"What is the meaning of all this?!" Twilight asked, "You better have finished cleaning up the uvula."
"I haven't finished there yet, no. But I have made an important discovery I wish to discuss with you, Princess. First let us get away from this madness." And he presented his protected wings as he flew them up to the top of the Booger Dam one by one. The gang admired the view of the traffic, but Discord pressed on: "the cellular ponies here have a strange method of income which depends on their host's reputation. Whatever good deeds Rainbow Dash does, whatever heroic things, the cellular ponies involved get paid." He couldn't risk slipping out his attempted take-over of Luna's sister, so he kept his lips tight at this point. He went on, "I've made observations all this time to help my campaign because I believe I can make some real changes in this city, as Mayor I'll clean up this one-horse town - heehee - to make Rainbow Dash a better pony as well!" and he triumphantly threw his arms up.
After a brief pause Rarity snapped: "That's ridiculous! The Mayor is doing a perfect job and Rainbow Dash is a nicer and better pony than you'll ever know!" Spike nodded in agreement.
"You head right on down to her mouth and finish what you started in there! I'll hear no more of this madness" Luna ordered.
"Very well" Discord murmured, but looked visibly hurt. I'll finish what I started, alright. You'll get your comeuppance for leaving me, princess. I may not have brought myself to explore Celestia, but I'll be damned if I don't allow myself a little chaos.... He had gone from sweet-natured and well-meaning to mischievous and deceitful in a matter of seconds, the positive impact of Fluttershy's words made redundant by the cold directness of Luna's orders. As he flew off towards a toll-gated passageway signposted 'To Mouth & Throat District: restricted access' , he planted a small detonator in Rainbow's sinuses - it blew off sending fragments into the nasal hairs and leaving a large crack in the Booger Dam, and sure enough - to the policepony unit's despair - a wave of snot began to slowly sweep through.
Princess Cadence was talking Celestia through a complex briefing about the full-scale search party mission her guards were about to conduct, but she was not a good orator: Applejack and Pinkie Pie sat half-asleep, Rainbow Dash yawned noisily, and Fluttershy seemed distant. "...So in short, we must tend to this search immediately" she concluded.
"Good. Oversee preparations" Celestia decreed calmly, as Cadence ordered her top guards in.
Suddenly, Rainbow jumped up from her slump and giggled - waking not just herself up, but also a startled Pinkie and Applejack. "What in the wide world of sports are y'all playin' at, Rainbow Dash?!" Applejack demanded.
"Haha I have no idea, but my nose totally tickles right now - aaa...aaCHOOO!" She sneezed loudly and even Celestia appeared surprised. "Excuse me, Princess" Rainbow said sheepishly, brushing her nose slightly with her hoof.
Inside her nose, the Booger Dam Operations chief, Cyrus Sinusfeather, sighed as a crisis was averted. He had had no option but to give the order for an emergency sneeze to remove the snot which had just threatened the traffic. The cellular ponies and their cars were safe: they simply buckled up and their cars would stick to the surfaces; it was standard practice but Sinusfeather didn't like to do it because of the inconveniencing delays it sometimes caused. Maintenance teams were now cleaning the shards wedged in and around the nasal hairs, whilst others were welding the dam's crack. The policeponies were trying to bring order to the traffic, but with Nasal Passage 1 closed due to a blockage, it was still congested here. The gang were busy helping clear away Discord's ridiculous posters, and even found themselves signing autographs and posing for pictures with eager fans as they travelled by.
What they didn't know was that Discord had not gone back to Rainbow's mouth. He had instead travelled to Chesterton, the district surrounding the heart and lungs. This was a popular area that had loads of nightclubs, bars and restaurants and young ponies out and about. Discord was fascinated to see that central to Rainbow Dash's heart was the Element of Loyalty, which was a physical essence in the shape of the red lightning-bolt her necklace bore, which angered his mind - She literally holds this element close to her heart, just like the rest of them. Ugh. He stood himself on a small stage assembled in front of The Aorta Apollo theatre, and began shouting his promises to change the city for the 'better', blurting out economical benefits he had constructed halfheartedly. Within minutes he found his audience had doubled however, as ponies walking about stopped to listen, and curious commuters were even slowing down on the roads above to listen. Eventually he had convinced a vast crowd to cheer him on, and he explained that he would go and propose his policies to the Mayor (he secretly planned to kick him out) to a series of cheers. The citizens were naturally delighted to see someone passionately express concern for the well-being of not only their host, but their lives too; they cheered him on as he made his way up to the brain.
Entering the Mayor's office unannounced, Discord leaned in menacingly and let out a sinister laugh. After Discord had lied to him that the citizens wanted himself as new mayor, the Mayor turned to look out a window and saw a crowd of ponies singing Discord's name, holding up his 'face' posters and pictures of Rainbow Dash saying "let's make Dashie even greater". The Mayor sighed for he was old but before he could even respond, Discord simply tied him up and locked him in his own office cupboard! He then went out onto a balcony and waved at the ponies as his face appeared on monitors and screens all across the body: workers looked up from their stomach wall repairs, whilst beachgoers on the other side of the stomach saw too; residents of Neck Hill saw it on their sets; Oovla and her department looked on in horror from their offices in the uvula; even adventurous walkers in Tail County picked up the news on their radios.
Not before long, Discord saw through RainbowVision that Celestia had sent Rainbow, Applejack, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie back to Ponyville, claiming the matter to be too sophisticated and specialist, much to their chagrin. Discord decided to make a first move that would win over more of these citizens.
"As if Celestia kicked us out! This is totally our business!" Rainbow moaned as they sat on the train.
"Our friends are lost" Applejack agreed.
"There's nothing we can do anymore" Fluttershy muttered.
"Well, I don't think so!" Rainbow stressed. "You forget, I'm the loyal one" she smirked. Fluttershy didn't look impressed as the foursome debated what to do.
"Maybe if we sent out a Friendship distress signal from her castle, Twilight would come back" Rainbow suggested.
"You know what, y'all? I think we should just leave it to the Princesses, if I'm honest" Twilight knows what she's doin" Applejack sighed eventually. The ponies nodded as they set off to their respective homes for the night; it was now quite late.
With the dispersing crowds pleased to have seen their host display her loyal virtue, Discord laughed slyly as he watched the Celestial sun set through Rainbow's eyes. Nighttime would be the perfect time to cause mischief around this City! Before this could happen, Rainbow Dash bumped into Scootaloo.
"Oh, hey Scootaloo." Rainbow said, almost uninterested.
"Rainbow Dash! I'm so glad I ran into you, I need your help for something" the young filly said.
"Shouldn't you be in bed already? It's late for you now Scootaloo"
"Well, yeah but...there's this 'big sibling' treasure hunt tomorrow, and I thought since you're like my big sis..."
Rainbow smiled with smug pride, but then shook her tired head. "Scootaloo look, I've had a really long day and I need to get some rest. This is too late. I'm totally about to fall asleep any min- " Rainbow began snoring deliberately loudly as she snoozed then and there.
Scootaloo nudged her awake and pressed further, "Come on, it won't take long - I just need you to sign - "
"NO! Scootaloo, I'm super tired and I've already said no!" Rainbow finally snapped.
Scootaloo began to shed a tear. "Okay...I guess having a big sister figure like this won't be worth having tomorrow" she cried, before running away with tears in her eyes, and leaving Rainbow Dash behind wearing a sad expression, upset to have let down her biggest fan.
Of course, Discord had activated the exclusive voicebox over-ride from the Mayor's office, and had basically made Rainbow tell Scootaloo to get lost. Poor Rainbow was left upset with herself, but within her head Discord began to oversee the night-time arrangements as she, suspecting nothing, made her way to bed up in the Cloudominium. Curiously, as the pegasus curled up for the night, all the lights in the microcity were dimmed as soon as Discord activated 'sleep mode'. Going for a stroll downtown, he noticed that not only was the whole city pretty much asleep, it was also in near-darkness as only the unfortunate night-shift cellular ponies oversaw basic functions in the Respiratory department and Circulatory Line transit system. You should never really go to bed in a bad mood, the chaotic troublemaker thought. "Ooh, what a wonderful idea!" Discord chirped aloud, as he headed back to Brain Central's cinema to watch Rainbow's dream live. A few citizens were up late watching it as well, as Rainbow dreamt about the time she had been irritated by Pinkie Pie's sister Maud and her rock obsession. Having been angered before bed, the dream being generated was reflective of her emotion, presumably automated. Rainbow even grunted in her sleep, but then proceeded to snore loudly.
Oovla and Toby were the only ponies still awake in the MSD's uvula HQ. They stood on the lower deck and watched the front of the mouth as it opened and closed slowly with every snore. Air came rushing in and out, gushes howling around the cavernous oral cavity before it went down below the observing workers and into the Respiratory department. "Not the easiest day at the office, if I'm honest" Toby said. He was still fairly new to this job, having started work as an intern in the spleen. His attention to detail and organisation had caught the attention of the MSD and Oovla had recruited him just over six months ago, in her mission to make the mouth a safe place for the public once again.
"You can say that again" Oovla agreed, sighing. They had both been startled to see Discord assuming office in the city they worked so hard to protect, and felt cheated by the system; like many others they had missed all of the campaigning down in Chesterton. Unfortunately, the Element of Loyalty reverberated in this city, and allegiance to the Mayor remained an integral part of citizens' lives here. The two of them jumped suddenly as the elevator doors 'pinged' open behind them, and Twilight Sparkle appeared with her friends. They all exchanged greetings, but then Twilight looked concerned.
"Has Discord finished cleaning his graffiti yet?" she asked.
"Erm, no he hasn't...I assume the Mayor thought it unnecessary" Oovla replied awkwardly. Citizens are expected to remain fully subservient and loyal to their Mayor and so neither Oovla nor Toby could say a word against him now.
"What does the Mayor have to do with it...?" Rarity asked puzzled.
"We're going to go and see the Mayor right now, then" Luna decided, as they headed back into the lift and caught an empty Nervous Line train back to the brain. The MSD officials didn't even try to deter them, but said nothing in weary silence, quietly hoping their visitors' enterprise would prove successful.
Discord was sitting in the mayoral office, sporting a fine suit and tie, sorting out his papers in an attempt to decide which policy would keep the citizens happiest for now, allowing him to get on with his own mischief. Should I increase tourism by making Rainbow invent a new flight pattern for the Wonderbolts? Should I raise taxes in Neck Hill in an effort to improve living conditions for those in the lower South side? The former Mayor had also mentioned their continuing struggles with Rainbow's narcolepsy to him...Or maybe he could approve planning for a new night club scheduled to open in the stomach... His mind was just turning towards the under-funded MSD and their dire situation when the doors slammed open and Twilight's gang burst in. "Discord, what are you doing?!" Twilight demanded. "You've NO right to be here."
"You simply can't just waltz on into a city and overthrow their Mayor" Rarity protested.
"Oh, dear Rarity, apparently I can" he retorted with a chuckle. "Look at what I'm doing for this city already" he said, gesturing to the plaza outside. As the ponies turned to the window distracted, Discord pressed some buttons and flicked a switch, having decided what his first mayoral act was to be: wake up Rainbow and get her to brush her teeth. By improving the conditions of this silly pegasus' mouth, it would no longer have to remain off-limits to the public, but instead we could actually offer tours in there and I'll generate profits! He dialled the Dental Hygiene Unit and demanded a team to come to his office; just as he did this, Spike turned around.
"Yeah, there's noting different out there...other than your stupid face all over the place" the dragon said bitterly, looking out at the ridiculous posters of Discord everywhere; Luna simply shook her head. The DHU team came in all of a sudden, four of them, looking grumpy at this time of night.
"What the hell is this about now?!" Twilight asked, coincidentally in unison with the team's leader.
"Well, I've been feeling awful for how I behaved earlier. I figured the best way to go about apologising would be to polish up this town, as I said I would." Discord exclaimed proudly.
Just as Discord spoke, the News TV on the desk emitted its headline update: "A very good evening to you all, Rainbow Dash citizens, I'm Sally Gland. Our top story tonight: the vandalism problem - an MSD patrol unit reports the discovery of abnormally-large spray cans found lodged in the throat. RDPD officials have confirmed that the spray cans were responsible for this afternoon's cough attack, and were tested for prints. The results matched none other than Spike the dragon, acquaintance of Rainbow Dash and currently vacationing in the city. Anypony knowing the dragon's whereabouts should contact the police immediately..." Twilight and Luna turned to Spike with furious stares.
"Spike, what in Equestria is this?!" they demanded, as the DHU members growled at him menacingly.
Spike shook with fear, casting his eyes to Discord, who made a throat-slice gesture back at him. Drips of sweat glided down his scales until he could contain it no more. "IT WASN'T ME, IT WAS DISCORD!" He yelled, as the princesses simply scoffed.
"Don't try shove the blame on him. He's in enough trouble already. That reporter just said your fingerprints were found all over graffiti cans!"
"No, seriously - he did it and tried to bribe me to take the blame!"
Luna tilted her head at him, confused. "Explain yourself."
Spike sighed. Discord tried to intervene but Rarity and Twilight held him down. The young dragon began: "you see, Discord and I actually met already, when we originally entered Rainbow's body separately this morning." The girls gasped. "Discord told me that he had seen potential to start something 'special', but swore me to secrecy whilst you were all wondering where he'd gone in the meantime. I went along with it, but then I saw that all he was doing was vandalising and I tried to stop him. To reason with me, he promised me this super-cool new Ogres and Oubliettes game board that only came out yesterday! I agreed to take the blame should it be investigated, to say I only wrote 'Discord was here' to look like it was me framing him - but that was before he or I knew about this city; don't forget, we weren't this microscopic before...I didn't think it would matter so much then, but now I see the problems it caused; I should've stopped him!" He broke down and apologised, but Twilight offered her lifelong friend a hoof on his shoulder.
"Don't worry Spike, you didn't do anything wrong. But YOU!" Twilight snapped at Discord.
Luna stroked her chin. "Wait...then how do you explain the prints?"
Discord looked proudly triumphant, knowing full-well he had cast a very basic spell to switch prints with Spike's on the cans before he'd even used them the second time. Spike had no idea, and so simply looked distraught whilst Twilight pondered over it. She said softly to him, "It's okay, Spike. Even if you did do it, Discord will still pay the punishment because of everything else he's done today."
One of the DHU coughed intrusively, and Discord turned to them: "Now in a minute we're going to wake the host, and I want you at your stations because it's action time!"
"We're on strike" one of the team said sulkily. They knew that sucking sugary mints wasn't enough for Rainbow to keep her mouth fresh.
"Ah yes but for the very reason which I am now to rectify" he said, gesturing towards his control panel. The DHU team appeared to get the hint and looked pleased as they hurried off down the hall.
"I recognised their jackets; we saw them in the mouth earlier...what are you doing to poor Rainbow Dash?" Luna asked.
"Oh you'll see. Come with me" Discord ushered them out, whilst the Mayor - still tied up in the broom closet - muffled for help in vain.
CHAPTER 7
Discord led the gang out to the cinema through the darkened plaza. They even spotted a couple of dodgy street criminals making transactions, presumably small-time germs and bacteria like flu or stomach ache symptoms. They reached the cinema, but this time Discord led them backstage. This was a breath-taking sight: an immense room of screens and file-cabinets, all displaying events of Rainbow Dash's life - good and bad times. The left side was distinctly nightmare-fuel events for the pegasus - even amusingly featuring the Tantabus' singing flute-playing sunflowers; the right was filled with pleasant memories. In fact, one monitor was lit up and linked to the projector; it was currently showing the time when the Mane 6 had overcome Lord Tirek after he had converted Discord and then betrayed him. "Now be very careful" Discord urged, "because if you touch anything you could severely alter her dream." The gang trod carefully before Twilight eventually asked why he had brought them here. He replied gleefully, "Well you see, I'm planning to wake Rainbow Dash up, so that she can bru - "
"No! You leave her alone!" Rarity interrupted, charging at him with a fierce look on her face as she sought to defend her friend.
"But don't you see, I'm trying to - "
"Not a word, Discord! That's enough from you" Twilight said, and using what she'd read from the citizens' Magic book's chapter on tourism, she briefly managed to summon magic from her horn in an effort to freeze Discord. He dodged the shot but it ricocheted off a screen. The screen, which displayed the time Rainbow had yelled at her parents for cheering 'every little ridiculous, insignificant thing' that she would do, briefly lit up and suffered interference. The irony of that quote Spike thought upon seeing this, thinking of the citizens' day-to-day efforts within her, no matter how insignificant...
---Rainbow frowned in her sleep, looking pained. ---
"Careful!" Discord said, but the Princess had heard enough and continued to aim at him in their anger, this time pushing him onto the screen currently projecting. It tilted the projector onto the five of them as a struggle ensued between them, oblivious to the projector shining on them.
---With a vision of her friends and Discord seemingly in a fight, Rainbow moaned and sprang up awake. "Huh?!" she looked around startled, and wiped warm drool from her mouth.----
The fivesome froze wide-eyed in horror as they realised what had happened. Even the cellular ponies in the cinema began to complain where the intended movie had gone. "Wh-what happens now?" Spike asked nervously.
"We better hope my team are on the case, that's what happens" Discord muttered.
---An idea came to Rainbow, as she sleepily walked over to her sink and picked up her old toothbrush.---
Discord's walkie-talkie buzzed in his pocket. Relieved that his plan had gone relatively successfully, he dusted his hands of the matter and then flew out the room before the gang could stop him. "Dammit! We have to catch him!" Twilight urged, as they gave chase.
It was morning by the time the gang woke up. They had fallen asleep on a bench in a park within the Ears Valley district, shattered after the eventful day they'd had. Chasing Discord all over Brain Central had been too much for them, and so they all stretched having had a pleasant sleep. All around, this bustling city was active and busy - they realised this meant Rainbow was also awake. Luna led them to the brain, but they were stopped by some cellular ponies. "Have you heard the news?!"
"No, what news?"
"Rainbow brushed her teeth last night! First night-brush in weeks!"
"What's it to you?" Spike asked.
"Well, my husband Danid works for the MSD - apparently, the way they're heading, mouth county will soon be presentable enough for me to visit him and his section, and so will everypony else!" the two microponies squeed with joy. "This is all thanks to the Mayor; he promised us he'd help the city!" The two of them hurried off happily, and the gang observed various other groups of ponies talking about it excitedly. Even the newspapers in the nearby kiosk had it as front-page news.
"So that's what he was up to" Spike said.
"He was trying to do something good" Twilight bowed her head, feeling bad. "But, let's not forget Oovla's been trying that for months too..."
"Heavens darling, thank goodness Rainbow Dash brushed her teeth - absolutely dreeaadful for her not to do so!" Rarity exclaimed with a shudder.
"Maybe he really could be good for this city..."
"Be that as it may, we still have to get out of here - with Discord. It's not right. Think how worried all your friends must be, including Rainbow Dash" Luna pointed out, and nodding in agreement they headed up the elevator once more.
After a difficult apology to Scootaloo this morning, Rainbow Dash had gone to Sugarcube Corner to meet Pinkie Pie for brunch, and Applejack was quick to join them as she walked past. "I seeeriously hope Princess Celestia's made some discovery or something" Rainbow said as she slouched in her chair.
"If she has, we'll be first to hear about it I'm sure" said Applejack.
"I just hope they're safe...it's probably terrifying being so small like that" Rainbow thought sadly. "And it didn't help that I practically swallowed Spike earlier..."
"Ah well. We did whatever we could, at least. Now who's ready for some super-duper scrumptious fooood?" Pinkie said, practically bouncing off the walls carefree.
"I sure am, y'all!" Applejack said cheerily.
"Oh maaan, I'm soooo ready for my sandwich" Rainbow rubbed her tummy.
"Oh, sandwich..." Pinkie muttered, discreetly throwing the sweetcorn fritters she'd prepared for Rainbow to one side. "One sec."
Back in Rainbow's brain, the gang had burst into the Mayor's office, ignoring Marjorie's protests that 'he's in a meeting'. They confronted Discord and demanded to know where the real Mayor was: it was then that they heard a muffled bang. Spike located it and opened the closet door, gasping. Picking up the broom that had fallen over, he removed the tape over the Mayor's face.
"Thank Celestia! This draconequus is a lunatic, he must be expelled immediately! This is the thanks I get for such courtesy and hospitality to you?! You...set this MONster on me so that you can take over your friend's body!?" the Mayor rasped furiously.
"No, no, Mr. Mayor please, we had nothing to do with this. We separated from Discord briefly whilst we were on our tour, and he ventured elsewhere...here apparently" Twilight assured him.
The Mayor needed to calm down for a few minutes after being imprisoned, and then he nodded his head. "I can't imagine you would do such a thing, Princess. You must forgive me; I'm just not used to being thrown out of office so quickly!"
Marjorie then called through the open door: "I have to say Sir, city council could use a political advisor like Discord"
Discord looked excitedly at the Princesses, but Luna spoke up: "I'm afraid that would never be possible. None of us may remain here; we must return to our society and our friends." The Mayor understood, and escorted them through the hall, past a cute statue of the Mane Six labelled "Loyalty pays off". At this point Twilight handed her check-out book to Marjorie, who begrudgingly accepted it to take back to the library. They carried on upstairs into a secured room, walled by squishy matter of the brain, which simply had an elevator at the end of it. Boarding it, they travelled straight to the roof of City Hall - the very top of Rainbow's brain - where he had a private helicopter waiting.
"You're most welcome to return any time! We're happy to have had such esteemed guests here in the City of Rainbow Dash," the Mayor said cheerfully.
"You've been incredibly kind and forgiving, Mr. Mayor. We hope we haven't caused too much inconvenience" Twilight said.
The Mayor chuckled, "Nonsense, we can handle a little inconvenience now and then, haha - we are inside the most awesome Pegasus in Equestria, remember! Anyway, I must get back to work; the stomach coastguards have just informed me we've got a childhood favourite snack coming in any minute now!"
They said their goodbyes and then they were off. Twilight looked out as they headed towards a narrow passage. Rainbow's pasta-potato sandwich on sourdough, I bet those muscle experts will enjoy using all those carbs... The gang discussed all the fun they'd had; Discord even admitted to leaving behind some 'tips' for the Mayor on his desk - but then Luna spoke seriously.
"Neither Rainbow Dash nor anypony else can ever know about this incredible discovery we've made over the past day or so. It would not only compromise the economy and very function of the cities which presumably exist in other bodies, but also psychologically damage ponies like Rainbow. Understood?" The gang nodded, but Luna wasn't convinced by a distracted Discord. "As for you..." she began, before summoning a magic spell from her horn and blasting Discord with it. With him apparently frozen in a blue bubble, she explained: "That is just a simple static-stasis spell I read from that book Twilight checked-out. However, we'll apply a memory-erasing spell later when our alicorn magic resumes; it should make him forget most of yesterday. I'll wake him when we're out and normal-sized again."
The helicopter carried them up to the Ears Valley at fantastic speed, right up to the outer perimeter of the inner ear canal, where daring hikers waved them by. "I'll drop you all off in your castle, Princess" the pilot offered, but Twilight shook her head.
"That won't be necessary; you can drop us off as soon as we're out of Rainbow's sight" she said. Whilst the others looked at her in surprise, she explained. "Look: we have what we need" and she presently removed her satchel from around Discord's neck while he sat motionless. Out of the satchel came the two potions; Luna cheered gleefully as she pointed at the purple one longingly. The helicopter had now reached the outer ear, and they passed a friendly billboard stating: Thank you for visiting the City of Rainbow Dash, stay cool!
The helicopter flew out into the room, and the gang turned to look back at their gigantic friend in the flesh: Rainbow Dash - effectively their 'home' for the past 24 hours - was indeed munching on her sandwich, and Pinkie Pie and Applejack were enjoying brunch with her! It was great to see them again. As soon as they were out of sight down an alleyway nearby, they thanked the pilot - who took off once more in his city-seal clad chopper, soaring beyond the eye could see, back to the life he and millions of others lived completely oblivious to normal ponies. Without further hesitation they applied the potion to themselves. Spike was so happy he even kissed the ground he stood on, as Rarity and Twilight exchanged a brohoof whilst Luna completed her penal spell on Discord. Twilight ordered Spike to send a letter to Canterlot, to let Celestia know they were safe. They knew they had just experienced something they'd never be able to share with any other pony besides themselves, ever. Still, the look on their friends' faces when they walked into the room was enough to melt their hearts. Pinkie ran to hug them all, whilst Applejack and Rainbow Dash cheered them in.
"Y'all made it! What in Equestria happened?" Applejack asked.
"It's a long story. Cut short, we had a mix-up in the Canterlot lab and all had an argument trying to decide a strategy...eventually we travelled by feather onto a table where we were able to apply our potions and get back to normal!" Twilight explained in a fumbling fib.
"Yawn, boring - I totally expected you to come back with some awesome adventure story" Rainbow moaned; Spike and Rarity exchanged an amused glance as Rainbow took a large bite out of her sandwich.
Twilight sent Spike to go and fetch Fluttershy, and handed her potions over to Luna quietly; Luna presently said goodbye and headed off back to Canterlot with a still-dazed Discord. As Spike returned with Fluttershy, they all sat together and shared fun stories of misadventures of the Mane 6.
"I never want to see those potions again!" Spike whispered to Twilight.
Twilight laughed, "Don't worry, Spike, hopefully we won't. Next time I want to make a potion, remind me to make it a household appliance" The two laughed as the gang sat and chatted happily.
Author's Note
There was significant influence from the numerous 'Fantastic Voyage'-style films that exist out there, but this one hopefully keeps a distinctly-MLP feel to it! Lot of fun to write and a personal favourite story arc of mine. Please leave a thumbs-up or comment!
There is a sequel to this story, "An Internal Conflict", available here.
