You've Come To The Right Neighborhood

by MrWriterWriter

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Anthro, Main 6, Romance, Spike, Comedy
Length: 26596

Spike planned to be an archaeologist, not a xenobiologist. An ancient dig changes things, and he's in for the ride of his life...in more ways than one.

(This is basically a reboot of sorts of New Neighbor.)
Ok, first off, let me give you the rundown. My name is Spike Draksen, a Nineteen year old college student. And a nerd hoping to become an archaeologist. Unfortunately, it's that aspiration that's led me to my current situation.

While on a class trip to a practice dig, I thought I had hit the jackpot finding an odd stone decoration. On touching it, I was yanked through...SOMETHING.

Now, I'm currently in a somewhat unusual little town named 'Ponyville', surrounded by small anthroporohic, technicolor...pony people, in the middle of an even more unusual country called Equestria. And I still don't know how I got here...much less how I'm gonna get back.

At least the locals are friendly, and seem keen on making me feel at home.

VERY friendly, actually...

And...I'm...I'm still trying to get accustomed to them being naked 90% the time...

Published 2018-06-05 01:40:07 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-25 03:16:35 UTC

First Contact Chronicles

Entry No.1, Day 2. Date: currently unknown.

Given my current situation, I felt it would be a good idea to keep a journal of my time in this new world, in case I do find a way home. To begin with, a few details might be in order so the reader will know how I got here in the first place.

Deciding the class could use some hands-on work, my college's Archaeology teacher got permission to look over the ruins of a farmhouse that was recently found in the woods outside town (I had been majoring in the subject with a minor in Ancient History). While none us expected to really find anything, it gave us the chance to work on our observation skills, and see how well we could identify something on the off chance we did uncover anything of interest. While most examined the outer area or the ground floor, me and a couple others volunteered to check the cellar in case the previous owners had left anything there for possible safekeeping.

While the building was estimated to be around two hundred years old, the cellar seemed to have been made well before then, carved right into the bedrock. Sadly, most of the contents were just rotting pieces of furniture; poor storage had left them covered in fungus, gnaw marks from animals that had managed to get in, and insect bore holes. What little metal there had rusted into worthlessness. However, it was also there that I found it, set into a small alcove in the corner behind the remains of what appeared to be stocks. Although at first glance, I have to admit that at first glance I thought maybe we'd stumbled into some kind of cultist's turf due to what it was.

A small, saucer-sized tablet with a bizarre entity's face engraved on it rested in the alcove in an almost perfect fit. even odder was the fact that, while it was behind who knows how many years of cobwebs and even a bit of mold, the details were still sharp, like it had been carved within the last couple of years. It had a narrow, elongated face with a gazelle/antelope horn on one side of its head, antlers on the other, a look in its eyes that seemed to be a mix of half-crazed and amused, and a single fang sticking from a grin that, for some reason, looked smug.

It was kind of comical, in a warped sort of way.

I still ask myself what possessed me to touch it, instead of calling the teacher like I should have. Maybe it was the excitement of possibly finding a genuine piece of antiquity, or shock that there was something there beside rust and rot. But, without much hesitation, I reached to see if it was removable.

And all hell broke loose, for me at least. Everything went a mix of orange and periwinkle as I felt myself suddenly yanked through...well, I'm not sure WHAT, exactly. The closest description would probably be trying to breaststroke through oobleck. I smelled orange juice and mint toothpaste, and tasted cherry caramel for I don't know how long before it all ended as abruptly as it started.

Unfortunately, the ending somehow left me in a different location than the farmhouse; FAR different.

About fifteen feet in the air above a hillside, to be exact. Needless to say, the landing wasn't fun, nor was the roll down that followed. I don't fully remember what I bounced off along the way, but I still have the bruises and scrapes. Either way, I should be grateful it wasn't any steeper than it was.

I soon came to a stop by a large bush, though I lost consciousness shortly after. However, I was fortunate that someone had either seen or heard me, because I managed to notice them running my way before blacking out.

I'm not sure exactly how long I was out, but according to the one who found me, it was several hours. This brings me to...well, whoever reads this will probably think I'm making this all up...but on waking up, I found myself in a bed that was a little smaller than I'm accustomed to, but surprisingly comfortable, and only in my boxers. Though, after feeling the stab of pain in my side and seeing the various bandages, it's understandable. That, and I wasn't exactly in much of a condition to get up anyway.

This was also when my rescuer came in, as it turned out it was her house I woke up at. Though, for that first moment I thought I was suffering a concussion-induced hallucination since I found myself looking at a yellow pony.

A small (around four and a half feet tall at best) humanoid butter-yellow pony with light pink mane and tail, to be exact; wearing a small lacy waist apron that, judging from the nuts and berries poking out, was used to help with gathering. Once she saw I was awake, she was almost instantly a mix of relief that I was awake and fretting over my injuries.

Yes, she...that was easy enough to tell...because the apron was all she had on.

In other words, she was as naked as the day she was freaking born! That, coupled with being right beside me, gave the perfect view of her breasts. Now I'll admit, they were nice; very nice (I guess low-mid DD if she was my height), nicely rounded, with nipples the same shade of pink as her hair. And the rest of her was attractive as well, I won't lie; slender waist that flared into some impressive hips, long legs fitting for a model, bright blue eyes, long lashes, and a cute soft-spoken voice. I also notice she had a pair of small, feathered wings on her back and some kind of tattoo/emblem on both her hips in the form of three butterflies (Hey, I'm a guy. I see a nice figure, I'm gonna take note.) But, again, aside from the apron, she was NAKED!

Needless to say, it was just a little awkward for me when that finally sank in. I mean, she was nude, but for some reason, she didn't seem the least bit fazed about me seeing her like that! She introduced herself as Fluttershy (Dunno why her parents named her that, but it fit in a way) and it was then that I found out my current location. According to her, she lived outside a town called 'Ponyville' in the nation of 'Equestria', and admitted to have never seen something like me before. Armed with that information, it was fairly easy and reasonable to conclude that, somehow, I wasn't on Earth now...

It was a bit of a shock. Luckily, she didn't hold my fainting against me.

Entry No.2, Day 2. Date: Still Unknown

Once I was able to regain my composure (well, that and when it fully sank in that she apparently liked being nude at home, and I was able to make myself ignore it...at least a little), I had an informative discussion with Fluttershy...at least, after learning that she'd sent my clothes-which apparently had gotten damaged in my fall-to someone named Rarity to fix them. While I'm grateful, it does make it hard to hide an erection with just boxers. (Again, she walks around her house NUDE when not using that apron!) It seems the countries of this world are more or less under a monarchy system; chieftains, emperors, queens and kings...though the two current rulers of Equestria, named Celestia and Luna, apparently prefer to be referred to by the 'Princess' title. Not sure why, but who am I to question the titles they use?

Also, this place is a fantasy buff's dream (something I'll admit that I am, as a hobby.)! Griffons, dragons, minotaurs, shapeshifting ponylike insectoids called Changelings, and all kinds of strange creatures! Also, the ponies are divided into four...I guess 'versions' would be the best way to put it:

Unicorns are the ones capable of using straightforward magic. And I mean MAGIC: levitation, teleportation, transforming things, energy blasts, the whole shabang!

Pegasuses...Pegasai...whichever they prefer, which Fluttershy is one of, can fly and are capable of manipulating weather...literally! I saw a couple through the window that were pushing clouds around, and I mean they had a hold of them and were pushing them around like bins!

Earth Ponies, which are the standard model, have a knack for growing things and are said to be the physically strongest of the lot.

And Alicorns, apparently, are a combo of the other three. They're also the current rulers; Celestia and Luna, their niece Cadance, and a friend of Fluttershy's, Twilight Sparkle, are the four princesses of Equestria; or three, to be exact. Technically, Cadance and her wife are the rulers of a neighboring region called the Crystal Empire.

Also, by luck, or whatever she used in these bandages, I'm feeling a hell of a lot better now, and can move around, though not real fast. Fluttershy's also decided that now that I'm recovering, she'd like me to meet her friends tomorrow. I was a little hesitant at first, but one hopeful look from that face of hers, and any reluctance I had crumpled.

Looks like I'm going from archaeologist to ambassador.

Spike sighed as he set the journal on the bedside table. Tomorrow was going to be quite possibly a very interesting day, and he had a feeling he was gonna to need some sleep. Hopefully, Fluttershy's friends' reactions to him would be similar to hers

He glanced at the pony girl snuggled up beside him, sound asleep. Since he could move around now, he had planned to sleep on the couch. However Fluttershy had insisted her bed was big enough for them both, not that he minded...it was kind of cute how she liked to cuddle up to him in her sleep.

But did she really have to sleep naked too!?

First Impressions

Spike bit back a wince when his side once again protested a little at his standing up, doing his best to stretch. Fluttershy had left about half an hour ago to get her friends, so he figured he'd look around a little in the meantime. As he did, he was greeted by several of the animals that made their homes in the small hutches and burrows that dotted the house and area around.

She'd mentioned during their talk that she looked after various animals, but he didn't know just how many until a group of birds, mice, squirrels, and even a couple of otters came bounding in to check out the 'new guy'. They didn't seem to mind him...well except for a rabbit with a bit of a snotty attitude named Angel, who wasted no time in letting Spike know he wanted him gone once he was awake.

After the furball tried to threaten him to get out with a rock, he decided to be get evil and simply told Angel about the rabbit and mushroom lasagna his grandma used to make on special occasions. "And I still remember the recipe; take one medium sized rabbit, properly skinned and dressed, using a sharp knife, cut the meat away from the bone..."

That was the first time he ever saw a rabbit blanch before it hightailed it out of the room.

"Too bad you guys can't give me a little more info about this place." He said to the two ferrets hanging around his feet, "Aside from what Fluttershy's told me, I have no clue what's going to happen."

They simply looked up at him and scurried over to a nearby chair.

"Heh. Yeah, maybe I should just relax. I can probably get a better idea of things once Fluttershy's friends arrive." Having them nod in response wasn't quite what he expected, "Curiouser and curiouser..." He mused, before giving himself a once-over in the mirror.

As many times as he'd asked his parents and the doctors he visited over the years, none of them could come up with a valid explanation as why to his hair and eyes shared the same jade green tone, or why he had green hair anyway, for that matter; though now, his hair had noticeable purple highlights as well. In the end, they attributed it to a recessive gene from somewhere down the line that'd decided to behave oddly. That hair now currently sat on his head as a spiky mop, somewhat framing a slightly skinny-looking face.

He ran a thumb over a two-inch scar beside his right eye; the aftermath of his aunt's overly-pampered cat deciding it needed to show him who was boss when he was twelve. He'd gotten banned from the woman's house permanently after duct taping the little bastard to the wall as payback.

Coupled with a six-foot-three, hundred-ninety pound frame-he wasn't scrawny, per se, but 'muscular' was definitely not a fitting adjective for him- that was currently still decorated with bandages and a more than a few bruises, 'a mess' was probably the only way he could describe himself at the moment.

That brought up more than a few questions as well; while Fluttershy was nice enough, how would her friends react to seeing him? Would they be as amiable as her? Or would they be freaked out? How would other ponies, or anyone else that lived in town for that matter, respond?

He stepped over to the foot of the bed where his satchel lay. Thankfully, he'd had it with him when he was yanked to this world. Fluttershy mentioned locating it not too far from where she found him, 'Need to thank her for finding this.' Opening it, he pulled out his wallet and looked at the few dollars he had...though it was probably all useless here, especially since he had no idea what their monetary system was.

Which meant, depending on how long he was here, he'd have to get a job. What kind of jobs did they have here anyway? Would he even qualify for one?

He sighed and shook his head. Worrying about all that wasn't going to help things; if things went south...well, maybe becoming a wanderer wouldn't be too bad. Quick search of his bag showed everything was still in it; compass, a small telescope, his MP3 player with a spare battery, extra notebook, sketchpad...

"Spike? Are you in here?" Fluttershy's voice called out from the front door, quickly getting his attention.

"Yeah. Just a second, Fluttershy." He replied, "Just making sure I hadn't lost anything." He went into the living room to find her carrying his clothes. However, he froze briefly at what she was wearing...or, what she wasn't. Instead of the apron, she had on slippers, along with a pair of light green stockings that went to her upper thighs, and nothing else.

Granted, she DID look nice in them, but still...why was that all she had on if she'd gone to get her friends...? He fought back the slightly confused sigh and decided he'd see if he could ask about it later. At least, once he found out how to without sounding like a prudish jerk.

And once he was able to not stare.

"Rarity was a little surprised when I brought your clothes in, mostly by the size and how much material there was." She said, handing them to him, "Um...I'm afraid she's made it her mission to put you in some, as she put it, 'higher fashion' after seeing what your shirt is made of." She looked at him, her cheeks pinking in embarrassment, "She's not a fan of canvas."

"Thanks." He looked at the long-sleeve shirt in his hand, a few barely visible stitches marked where rips had been mended. Pretty expertly, too. The shredded cuffs on his jeans had been repaired as well. He was about to tell her it wasn't necessary, but one set of clothes would only last so long, "Well, I guess a few extra won't hurt."

She headed back out to let him get dressed. It was then that he heard a few other voices outside.

"Are we sure we can trust this guy?" One spoke up. It was raspy and a little gruff, but still noticeably female, "I mean, how do we know this ain't a rogue Changeling setting up a trap or something?"

"Judging from how Fluttershy found him, it doesn't seem like something a Changeling would go through the trouble to stage, Rainbow. Especially if it leaves them unconscious and injured like that." This voice was a little harder to describe; the only way Spike could put it was having a 'girl-next-door' feel, "Besides, you saw those clothes. Not only would Changelings not bother with that, they can't imitate anything larger than their natural size. If those are any indicator, this individual is as tall as Celestia!"

"What if it's Chrysalis? Ah wouldn't put it past that double-dealin' bug to try somethin' if it got her some payback." Spike couldn't resist smiling at the southern twang in that new one. He'd always had a bit of a soft spot for a country gal voice.

"He...he's a not a changeling..." Fluttershy spoke up. He could damn near hear the blush in her voice, "Twilight, you said Changelings don't put out much body heat?"

"Pretty much, Thorax says their outer coverings provide good insulation." The 'girl-next-door' voice replied.

'Ok, so that's this Princess Twilight Sparkle. At least that's one name.' He thought, getting his shirt buttoned up.

"Well...he...he was too warm when I slept with him."

Spike felt his face heat up a bit remembering that; he'd planned to move over to the couch to sleep when he stopping hurting too much to move, but she wasn't hearing it.

"You what!?" The tomboy rasp-Rainbow, he was guessing-shouted, "Fluttershy, you just met him!"

"He was going to go sleep on the couch when he could move again...!" She retorted, though with a bit of a whimper in her voice, "I couldn't let him try that while he was still hurt, and the bed was big enough to share...and he was comfy..."

"Ah...so you just 'slept'...not..." This new voice had an air of poshness to it; Spike had a feeling this one liked to hobnob. He didn't catch what Fluttershy's response was aside from a squeak, but it seemed safe to assume she figured out what they were referring to.

Spike did the same, given how red his face was at the moment.

"Um...maybe I better go help her out." He said, now fully dressed. It took him a moment to cross the room, but that gave him time to notice the height difference before cracking his forehead on the door frame, as well as fight down the blush. The creak of it opening was enough to get the attention of the group out there.

"So..." He spoke up, wincing a little at the still lingering soreness, "I think this where I say either 'I come in peace', or 'klatuu bavarian taco'."

One of the other ponies, a bright pink one with an equally pink, and very floofy, mane promptly raised a hand, "Oh! How about 'Baa Weep Grahna Weep Ninny Bong'?"

He grinned and chuckled, "While a good one, I don't have any treats to offer." His grin widened a little when the others seemed surprised that he actually comprehended it, 'Maybe this won't be so bad...'"

An....'Introduction' Of Sorts.

'Maybe this won't be so bad'.

As soon as he finished that sentence, Spike discovered he'd just enticed Murphy.

'How', you might ask? Mostly because once he reached the 'a' in 'bad', he noticed that there were fourteen individuals standing there; a group of multicolored ponies, and one reptilian-looking individual that, given the row of spikes running down their back, he was willing to guess was a dragon.

All of them ranged in height; the tallest, a dark orchid colored pony with something on their forehead, looked to be about five even, to a light gamboge pegasus who looked to be to a couple inches below four feet. They were also giving him looks ranging from slight confusion, to a sort of calm acceptance, to a rather eager-looking smile from the floofy pink one, to incredibly curious from a lavendery-purple one with both wings and a horn. Given what Fluttershy had said about the pony types, this one had to be an Alicorn; the one named Twilight Sparkle, to be exact.

They were also all female. As for how he could tell: with the exception of footwear, and an accessory or two...every one of them was as naked as Fluttershy.

"Oh, I better introduce you." Fluttershy giggled a little. "Um, well, since I mentioned her to you, let's start with Rarity." She looked over at a light grey-colored....well, since she was a pony, mare probably seemed the better term. She was surprisingly curvy with azure eyes, a curled indigo hair and tail, wearing only a pair of high-heeled, thigh-high boots the same color as her hair. While not quite as busty as Fluttershy, maybe a low-C, tipped with off-white nipples, she more than made up for it with a pair of generous hips and thighs, tattooed as well, though her's was a trio of diamonds.

"Uh...h-hi." He said, trying not to stare at the way she almost strutted towards him. As she got closer, he noticed she was wearing a gold choker with a large heart-shaped ruby on it. 'Whoa...that seems like a hefty piece of jewelry to be just wearing out like that. What is that...a five, six ounce rock? Gotta be a few hundred Gs.' he thought, wishing he could dig up something like that. 'Must be a family heirloom or something.'

"Hello, Darling." She replied in a disarmingly cheerful manner, looking him over. "Well, I must say, designing a suitable wardrobe for you will be a welcome challenge."

"Thanks...Fluttershy mentioned that inside."

"Especially if it frees you that ghastly shirt." She looked at the garment like it'd made a rude gesture at her, "Honestly, who willingly wears canvas?"

"But I like this shirt..." He said to no one in particular.

"Give it a rest, Rares." The one with the country twang spoke up; a gamboge mare with green eyes, long blond hair and tail, both tied into loose ponytails, "It don't look all that bad to me." Wearing-appropriately-cowboy boots, a bandanna around her neck and a stetson hat, she was noticeably more muscular then the rest, but still quite curvy, with gently flared hips, a visible six-pack and mid-D bust. She smiled and tipped her hat a bit, "Howdy! Name's Applejack. Hope ya don't mind me sayin', but we ain't never seen a feller quite like you 'round here."

He chuckled weakly, "Kind of figured...not really sure how I got here to begin with..." Before he could continue, though, he found himself face-to-face with one of the smaller mares; a blue, cerise-eyed pegasus with rainbow-streaked hair and tail, wearing sneakers and knitted sleeve gloves. She eyed him somewhat suspiciously as she buzzed around him. During her 'inspection', he noted she had an obvious athletic build, though not quite as muscular as Applejack. She was also a bit more slender then the others too, but she still had curves of her own, large-b cup breasts, a modest hip flare with tattoos of a cloud and multi-colored lightening bolt, and what appeared to be a pair of Skittle Nipples, one dark blue, the other a pink similar to Fluttershy's. She wasn't unattractive by any means, but the circling was making him a little dizzy.

Thankfully, she stopped after a few more rounds and looked him in the eyes again, rubbing the fabric of his shirt collar between her fingers, "Hmmm..." Her eyes narrowed briefly, "Ok, you aren't a bug." She said nonchalantly, shrugging in satisfaction.

"Um, thanks...?" He replied, "Judging from the voice, I'm guessing you're the 'Rainbow' that thought I was one of those Changeling things. I could hear you talking about it."

"Yep, Rainbow Dash, THE fastest and most awesome pegasus in Equestria!" She smirked and did a high-speed loop-de-loop.

"Yes, yes, like we haven't heard that spiel every day." A somewhat cocky voice spoke up, followed by a bright azure unicorn with a cornflower and cerulean striped mane and dark violet eyes sauntered up, wearing high heels, a pair of elbow length gloves, pointed wizard hat and cape, all of it purple with silver star. She was also gifted with a similar figure to Fluttershy, though her hips weren't quite as wide. Tipped with a pair of navy blue nipples, the D-cup breasts she had bounced softly with almost every step as she walked around him, 'hmm'ing every so often. Her own tattoo was a stereotypical magic wand with a crescent moon behind it

As soon as she made a second walk around him, she grunted in what sounded like approval, "Well then." She looked at the others and pointed at him over-dramatically, "The Great and Powerful Trixie claims first ride on this stallion!"

"Dagnab it, Lulamoon!"

"Hey!"

"Woodoowha now??" Spike looked between the group and this 'Trixie', feeling a little lost at the situation. What the frik did she mean by that?

"Trixie Lulamoon!" Rarity snapped, glaring at her, "You know perfectly well you can't just jump a male without at getting to know him at least a little! It's rude; for all you know, he might not even be interested in you!"

"'Not interest---!?" Trixie sputtered angrily, "Look at these tits!" Spike quickly focused on a rock to the left of the orchid-colored mare, his face reddening as the cape-clad mare grabbed her breasts, giving them a shake before flipping her cape aside and slapping her rear, "Look at this ass! I DARE you to name one stallion who wouldn't want a taste of this!"

"Trixie, calm down!" He heard Twilight Sparkle speak up, "We all know males are in short supply, but you can't just pounce him!"

"WHY NOT!" Twixie snapped, "You of all ponies should know how frustrating it is when all you have is either your magic or your fingers, Sparkle! I want the real thing!"

"Nice going, Trixie!" Applejack snapped, "You scared the poor fella! Look at him, he's shakin' like a leaf now!"

True, Spike was shaking, but it was more along the line of 'Holy shit! A cute girl just fondled herself right in front of me!' rather than fear, "I...I'm good..." He tried to respond calmly, but it came out in a slightly cracked voice. It didn't help that he was trying to head off the oncoming erection and will it away before they saw.

"I am so, SO sorry!" Twilight squeaked, running up to him, causing Spike's eyes to widen some. She had a figure on par with Fluttershy, her taller height, probably around four-ten, helped accentuate the curves some; large, bouncy d-cup breasts topped with dark purple nipples. and generous belt-clad hips, decorated with tattoos of a large pink six-pointed star surrounded by smaller while ones. Combined with violet eyes and waist-length indigo hair, streaked with a line of pink and purple, it made him wonder if 'cute as hell' was the standard for this race.

"Trixie's just a little pent up!" She giggled weakly, blushing some, "Actually, we all are....kinda...but we're handling it..sort of...and like Rarity said, we just met you...!"

"I-I'm ok..." He said, forcing his voice back to normal. He was about to ask what she meant by 'males in short supply', when a loud, and extremely excited voice screamed...

"MY TURN!"

...and he found himself on his back, courtesy of the pink one, who's bright blue eyes was currently staring straight into his...as she sat on his stomach. While a tad on the plump side, she was no less curvaceous then the rest, the best way he could describe her was 'THICC'! DD-cups with dark pink nips, a pudge that was just enough to make her cuddly, wide hips, decorated with a triple balloon tattoo. Aside from footwear that seemed to be standard, she had on a blue and yellow party hat. "Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie!" She chirped, a wide, and oddly adorable, smile on her face.

"I...I see..." He wheezed, fighting back the whine of pain his side was demanding he let out.

"Welcome to Ponyville! I've never seen a whatever you are before! It must be a LOOONG way off if none of us have! Are you moving to town?"

Cultural Miscomunication

"Pinkie! Get off him!"

"Yeah, Trixie's stunt was bad enough. Now the poor fella looks plumb terrified!"

"And he's still hurt from his fall, remember/!"

While the group was having this discussion, Spike was busy wrapping his head around a few truths he was now discovering; one, this was now the second time he'd had physical contact with a naked female, even if both were a platonic setting. Two, for reasons he had yet to discern, this group seemed to have absolutely no problems with being naked in the open, much less around someone they'd just met. And third...this Pinkie hit like a baseball bat! Seriously, it almost knocked the wind out of him!

Before he could really ruminate on all that, he was brought out of his thoughts by a brief 'oop!' from the pink pony coupled with the feel of her suddenly being lifted off him, followed by the odd sensation of his own body rising into the air. "W-wha..?" Was all he could really get out; the both of them were enveloped in a bizarre purple light of some sort that slowly rotated him into a vertical position. Instead of bewilderment like he was experiencing, she just had a sheepish smile on her face.

Unfortunately - or fortunately - depending on how you see it, this rotating also had the added effect of putting his face in between Pinkie's thighs. Spike's eyes widened to near comical proportions when he realized he was just inches away from the plump lips of her center. "Whoa..."

'drip, drip'

It was also at that moment when he felt his face heat up, coupled with something warm and familiar trickling from his nose.

"He's bleeding!" Twilight's now concerned tone, along with Pinkie being abruptly moved aside, quickly roused him from his 'encounter'...only for a now worried looking alicorn's face to replace it, along with two very soft hands on either side of his face. "Oh my gosh, your nose!" She said frantically. "Oh no, you aren't coming down with something are you??" She ran her hands up and down. "You don't feel too warm, but illnesses aren't really my forte!"

Spike, meanwhile, was trying hard to keep calm after what he'd just experienced. 'There..there's a cute girl...who's also a princess...touching me...!' If this was anime, he'd swear a cloud of steam would've erupted from his mug.

"He's turning red!" Twilight yelped, looking back at the others. "Someone get Nurse Redheart!

"Twilight...I...I don't think he's sick..." The orchid-colored mare spoke up, stepping closer. Glancing her way, Spike noticed that, on closer inspection, her mane - a sort of swept back mohawk - and tail were a dark rose. He also noticed that the item on her head was the broken stump of a horn, revealing her to be a unicorn. Part of him wondered what could've done that, but felt it better not to say anything.

And for one reason or another, she was actually wearing an article of clothing, though it was just a white cotton bikini bottom. Her choice of footwear seemed to be some kind of military-style boots. While she wasn't quite as muscular as Applejack, she had visible definition on her arms and abs. But, like the others, she still had some admirable curves that went along with her mid C-cup chest, complete with pale pink nipples.

"Tempest, look at him!" Twilight protested before Tempest started whispering to her. During this, he saw she had a tattoo of what looked like a burst of fireworks.

As she whispered, Twilight's expression changed from alarmed, to confusion, to realization, then her face turned redder than his before she let out an alarmed squeak and vanished in a flash of the same purple light - causing the glow holding him and Pinkie to vanish in the process - reappearing a few yards away.

"Heh, sorry about that." The one she called Tempest spoke up, chuckling a little. "With a couple exceptions, Twilight's never really been around males, so she wasn't exactly prepared for getting that kind of reaction from one." She looked over at Fluttershy and two other mares he hadn't met yet; one a light purple-grey and the other yellowish-grey with glasses. All three apparently had made the same conclusion Twilight had since they were blushing just as brightly.

"W-w-wait...!" Spike yelped, backing up a little in panic as the pieces finally started falling in place, "I'm not a perv, I swear! This is the first time I've ever been around naked girls, much less physical contact!" With a groan, he slumped onto the ground. "Oh man..."

Tempest quickly crouched down by him. "You ok?"

"Yeah...jus-just a delayed case of culture shock." He chuckled weakly.

"Wait a moment." Rarity spoke up, her own cheeks pinking some. "What about when you were with Fluttershy..."

"I thought she just liked being naked at home!" He semi-whined. "Didn't wanna cause a scene!" He let out a long exhale to try and settle himself before looking at her. "Um...Tempest, was it?"

"Yep. Real name's Fizzlepop Berrytwist, but I thought Tempest Shadow sounded cooler when I was a filly."

'Fizzle...? First Fluttershy, then Pinkie, Twilight, and now Fizzlepop...I guess absurdly cute names are common here. Um, I can't help but notice you aren't acting the same."

"Heh, to be honest, I'm just happy you're reacting to me as a female first. I used to work for a guy who was pretty powerhungry...and most other Equestrians still kinda see that part of me first." She smirked and puffed her chest out a little, combined with a whispered - though he still heard her- "Guess I still got it."

'I'll second that.' He commented mentally, noticing her smirk widen when she caught him glancing at her breasts. "I..I see you're...um..I guess wearing a bit more than the others would be the best way to put it."

"Well, you've probably noticed by now that Equestrians don't normally wear clothes. At least, not out of formal stuff. I haven't really been back long, so I'm trying to get used to things."

"Yeah, Fizzie's still a little shy!" Pinkie spoke up, sitting not too far off. However, her legs were still spread out.

"Pinkie, could you at least cross your legs before he hurts himself!?" Tempest chided her as Spike clamped his hands over his nose to try and stem the resumed bleeding.

Royally Unexpected

"Are..you all right?" Twilight asked once Spike got his nose under control once again. "I'm really sorry! I didn't know you weren't accustomed to..."

"It's ok." he said, his voice muffled slightly due to pinching his nose. "I-it's a cultural thing. Not one I thought I've ever encounter." he chuckled weakly. "But there you go."

"Well, if you're fine with it-OH! I nearly forgot, we need to let Celestia know about you!" Twilight looked around her for a moment and huffed in frustration. "Darn it, I KNEW I should've brought my bookbag! Now I have to go back to town for something to write on."

"Um, I have a notepad and pen in my satchel if you're wanting to send a note or something." Spike wasn't too sure why she needed to write something, but he figured he'd lend a hand. "It should be near the foot of Fluttershy's bed."

"I'll get it." the pegasus in question spoke up. "You relax and focus on healing." with that, she trotted off back inside.

It took a good bit of his willpower not to stare at her backside as she did. 'Keep it together, man. This is neither the time or place to oogle. Hell, I'm still due for a freakout! I'm an alien on a planet with small, anthro pony girls! Granted, they are pretty damn cute, but still!' Fortunately for him, his attention was grabbed by the three smallest mares; the gamboge pegasus with cerise mane, a light grey unicorn with a grey rose and mulberry mane, and a light greyish olive earth pony with an amaranth mane as they almost bounded up to him.

"Hi!" They chirped in unison.

"I'm Sweetie Belle!" the unicorn squeaked, her voice cracking a little, wearing boots similar to Rarity's, but her's just reached her knees and were a pale lavender color, plus she had a noticeable charm bracelet on. The way she was bouncing on her heels made that hard to not note that she was considerably curvaceous with a nearly d-cup bust and hips that nearly screamed to be watched as she moved.

The Earth Pony was next. Like Applejack, she had on cowboy boots, but with a large red bow in her mane instead of a bandanna. It was easy to see that while Sweetie was mainly soft curves, she was more on the muscular side. That wasn't to say she didn't have a figure he could admire. She was also almost on par with Sweetie at a large C-cup and hips that flared to an impressive pair of legs. "Ah'm Apple Bloom!" she announced proudly, with the same twang as Applejack.

'Huh, they related?' he asked himself as he looked over to see the pegasus' wings buzzing excitedly. Wearing sneakers and what looked like those punk rock bracelets made from chain link. She had a more petite build than her friends though with still visible curves, and a large A-cup bust. A somewhat athletic build seemed to say she was something of a sports fan, similar to Rainbow. "And I'm Scootaloo!"

"And we're the CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS!" They yelled in unison, with enough force to make Spike stagger in an an attempt to stay on his feet.

"I-I see...!" Getting his balance back, he saw they had tattoos as well, though theirs were somewhat identical; a pink, red and purple shield with a music note in a star for Sweetie, heart in an apple for Apple Bloom, and feather in a lightening bolt for Scootaloo. 'Must be pretty close if they got matching ones.

"So where ya from? Like mah sister said, we ain't never seen a fella like you 'round Ponyville!" Apple Bloom asked, confirming Spike's musing on her and Applejack. "Appleoosa, either!"

"Ooh, are you from Minotaur country?" Sweetie asked, looking up at him.

"Minotaur??" Scootaloo gave her friend an incredulous look. "Come on, Sweetie, does he even look like one? He doesn't even have horns!"

"Well, what about you thinking he'd be a Diamond Dog!?" came the retort.

"He could've been, you never know." Scootaloo crossed her arms.

"All right, girls, calm down." Twilight spoke up. "We may not know what he is exactly, but we know what he isn't, at least" her attention shifted back to Spike. "Given what Fluttershy told us, he didn't plan to show up in Equestria, either."

"Still trying to figure that out." he replied, wincing a bit as he stretched. "All I remember is finding some old relic in a dilapidated farmhouse, then tumbling down a hill. Next thing, I'm in a bed with Fluttershy standing there."

"Hm...I wish I had some answers, but maybe it's better if you tell the whole story once we get you to Celestia and Luna."

Spike looked at her. Fluttershy had mentioned those two, how they were princesses along with Twilight. "Me...? Going to see more princesses? I'm still getting accustomed to being in front of just one...and that's a sentence I never thought I'd say."

"Don't you have princesses where you're from?" Pinkie asked, giving him a questioning look that, if he was honest with himself, was pretty damn adorable.

"Kind of." Spike shrugged. "I mean, there's a few around, but they tend to keep to themselves as far as I know. Had a classmate who thought she was supposed to be treated like one, but that's probably a different story."

"I found it!" Fluttershy called out, coming back outside with his spare notepad and a pen. "Sorry about how long it took. I caught Angel Bunny trying to throw it out and had to give him a scolding." she handed the items to Twilight, who quickly began to write out a note.

As this was going on, Spike noticed the purple and green dragoness step up. She was as naked as the ponies, except she was barefoot, and wearing a necklace similar to Rarity's, though her's was silver with a heart-shaped diamond. He had to admit she was attractive as well; a slender but still curvy build, with a large C-cup bust and hips that her tail accentuated.

"Hey." He spoke up

"Hi..." Before she could say anything else, Rarity pounced her with a mischievous look on her face.

"And this is my sexy little Barby-Warby!" The marshmallow-tinted mare stated, wrapping her arms around 'Barby-Warby' from behind and giving both her breasts a firm squeeze.

As she moaned a little, Spike couldn't help but notice her nipples, currently peeking out between Rarity's fingers, were colored a few shades darker than the green scales over her breasts.

"R-Rarity...! We just met him!"

"I don't see him objecting." Rarity purred, giving her nipple a pinch before turning her attention to him "Oh, and she's Twilight's assistant"

"R-right..." Spike managed to get out, his face heating up. 'Dontpopabonerdontpopabonerdontpopaboner!'

'Y-Yes...now if you're done, I need Barb to send this message to Celestia." A blushing twilight added, holding out a folded sheet of paper.

Barb gave the paper an apprehensive look before taking it. "Well.....here goes."

"Whoa!" Spike jumped back when she exhaled a plume of green flame that consumed the sheet. However, instead of wafting away, the smoke flew off in the direction of the big palace on the mountainside. "Th-that was fire! You can breath fire...! Why did you...??"

"Egghead and Princess Celestia like to use Barb's fire to send messages back and forth." Rainbow replied, hovering near his shoulder. "Don't ask me how; tried once and she lost me at 'to start with'"

"Ok..." He watched the smoke finally drift out of view. "That's actually gonna deliver the letter to this Princess Celestia?"

"Yep." Barb replied once Rarity stopped groping her. " It's an enchantment Celestia gave me in case Twi couldn't inform her of something in person, especially after Twi had a panic attack the last time she used a regular messenger and the message got delivered to the wrong pony."

"Barb, I did NOT have a 'panic attack'!" Twilight retorted, "I...just got a little antsy."

"Yeah, if antsy means needing a paper bag to breath into." Barb giggled at Twilight's pout.

'Heh, the princess is kinda cute when she does that.' Spike thought before something else came to mind. "So, how long does it normally take for her to respond?"

"Kinda depends on if she's in the middle of somethin'." Applejack answered him, "Might be anywhere from a few minutes to a couple hours."

Suddenly Barb coughed out a plume of flame. A plume that transformed into a rolled up scroll.

"Or about that long." Pinkie added as the others watched Twilight open it. "What'd she say?"

Dear Princess Twilight,

Given what info of you were able to relay from Fluttershy, a well as what you've personally learned about this newcomer, I have to admit that this is a most unexpected event.

Therefore, if he has recovered enough from his injuries, I suggest you bring him to Canterlont promptly. To ascertain how he came to arrive in Equestria and possibly where he is from as well.

Sincerely, Princess Celestia

Ponyville Town Semi-Tour.

"So, she actually wants to meet...me?" Spike asked with a mild bit of disbelief. Running into one princess was a one in a million occurance for a guy off the streets, like him. Meeting two...?

"Princess Luna'll probably be there as well." Twilight corrected him. "Technically you ARE a being from another world, this is kind of a big deal." She started writing off another note. "I'll let her know we'll be there as soon as possible."

While she did that, he looked over the two remaining mare. "Um, you are...?"

"Oh, ah, I'm Moondancer." The yellow-grey mare spoke up, blushing a little. She had a hairstyle similar to Twilight's, though it was red with purple streaks and a small barrette holding a lock up, along with thick black glasses with tape on the bridge. She was also rather buxom, wearing a virgin killer sweater, though it didn't really cover her DD-cup breasts very well. Her tattoo was a crescent moon with three stars.

"I'm Starlight Glimmer." The other said, wearing a purple tobbogan and belt. While not quite as full-figured as Moondancer, she was still on the curvaceous side, with tattoos of an eight pointed star with blue trails running from it.

All in all, this was a group of hotties, if he did say so himself. Hotties from another planet, but still..

The small 'fwoosh' of Barb's flame caused him to look over in time to see her fire once more engulf the message. It also brought his attention back to the main issue; he was going to be seeing other princesses...

"So, soon as you feel ready for travel, we can head up to Canterlot." Twilight smiled.

"Well, no time like the present, I guess." He said, surprising them.

"But you're still hurt!" Fluttershy protested.

"An' it's almost a full day gettin' there on the train." Applejack added. "Sure you'll be up for it?"

"Why not. To be honest, I need to walk around some, stretch my legs a bit. Besides, I can relax on the train...and, well, I've never rode on one, so this is kind of an experience for me too." At seeing the hesitant looks on most of them, he added, "I'll be ok, honest. I'm more sore than anything."

"Well..." Twilight started before gathering all fourteen all into a huddle, apparently to discuss the pros and cons. Spike had to fight the urge to drool at almost a half dozen firm backsides currently staring back at him, begging to be grabbed

'NO! Back Spike, no grabby! You just met them dammit!' He mentally scolded himself. By the time they were done, he's repeated the same line almost a dozen times.

"Ok, I guess there's no real hard in going there now." She consented along with the others. "But, we're going with you to be sure!"

Spike blinked. "A-all fourteen of you?? That seems a bit much, don't you think?"

"Since I found you, I am sort of responsible for you until you're fully healed." Fluttershy was the first to speak up.

"And as Princess of Friendship, it's my duty to come along." Twilight said.

"Princess...of friendship?" He asked, looking a bit confused when she nodded. Usually it was 'princess of whatever country they were from.' 'Well, I am in a completely different word, so it probably has a different connotation.' That also brought up something else. "So, I take it that's what your tattoos signify?"

"What tattoos?" This time it was her turn to be confused.

"The ones on your hips." He pointed. "I noticed that, except for Barb, you all have them. I just didn't wanna seem nosy in asking."

"You mean my Cutie Mark?" She asked, turn a hip to him so he could see it better. "I got mine back when I was a filly, way before I became a princess or an alicorn."

"Cutie mark...? The heck's a 'Cutie Mark'?"

"What!? How can anyone not know what a Cutie Mark is!?" Scootaloo almost looked scandalized at this.

"Yeah! It signifies what a pony's special talent is." Sweetie Belly piped up. "They appear as soon as we discover it. And it's apparent that YOU haven't gotten yours yet!"

Apple Bloom quickly followed. "Which means as the Cutie Mark Crusaders, it's our duty help you get it!"

"So we're coming too!" They finished in unison.

"But humans don't..." He tried to say. Unfortunately, they weren't really listening now.

Tempest was next. "Someone's gotta come alone to help you get used to the fact Equestrian's don't normally wear clothes. And since I'm technically the only one here who's still getting accustomed to it, well..."

"I really need to go anyway to check on my boutique's Canterlot branch." Rarity added.

"Wherever Twi and Rarity go, I go." Barb spoke up

"I live there, so...I can show you around some." Moondancer offered, still blushing.

"If you think I'm letting you out of my sight before you've had your 'Welcome to Ponyville/Equestria/First Human We've Ever Seen' party, then you're nuttier than peanut brittle!" Pinkie had her hands firmly on her hips. "Mm...peanut brittle."

"Someone's gotta make sure you eat." Applejack prodded him lightly in the stomach. "No offense, but yer looking a bit too much on the skinny side, and Ah just don't feel comfortable with it."

"This is a chance to study a race that's totally non-native to Equestria or any neighboring countries." Starlight was almost bouncing on her heels. "You bet I'm coming!"

"I want to, so there." Rainbow just hovered there, arms crossed, seemingly daring him to say otherwise.

"Trixie is not letting a specimen like you out of her sight until she's had her turn!"

"Riight..." Well, they seemed to have good reasons for wanting to come along...mostly. "So, I guess we better get going?"

"Ooh, we can show you some stuff around Ponyville on the way to the station!" Pinkie chirped, grabbing his hand and dragging him off, the others not too far behind.

"There's where Golden Oaks Library used to be before that giant bully, Tirek, blew it up." She pointed to what looked like a memorial with a small sapling growing in the middle. "Twilight and Barb used to live there, but they had to move to the crystal palace after that." The large crystalline structure towered over everything in town, from the size it was. Spike could only wonder how long it took to build it. "Starlight and Fizzie live with them there as well!"

"Fizzie?" Spike raised an eye to Tempest, who tried to hide a visible blush.

"She...likes giving friends nicknames." She replied, looking away some.

"There's Carousel Boutique, Rarity's dress shop." The energetic mare pointed to a building that resembled a large, enclosed gazebo.

"Primarily formal wear and accessories." Rarity patted her boot. "With the occasional work apron, of course."

"She and Sweetie live above it and Barb goes to help out from time to time." Pinkie continued. "Ooh, and here's where I work, Sugar Cube Corner, Ponyvilles very own bakery/restaurant!" There was a hint of pride in her voice as she pulled him past the building. "I have a room above the kitchen the Cakes let me have. They own the place"

'Why does looking at that building suddenly make me hungry??' He asked himself, shaking off the bizarre urge to gnaw on one of the windowsills.

"You already saw Fluttershy's place, and Dashie lives just outside town, too!" She pointed towards an oddly-shaped cloud, floating just a couple hundred feet up.

"She lives on a cloud?"

"Cloud mansion." Rainbow spoke up. "And why not? We pegasi can walk on them, and my hometown of Cloudsdale, where nearly every pegasus lives, is one giant cloud."

"Ah." He replied, not sure if he really wanted to try and understand the actual physics of such of a thing. Then again, he did see them moving the things around the other day.

As they passed through what was apparently the town square, Spike couldn't help but notice the trio of mares selling flowers...and looking at him with a mixture of confusion, worry, and slight panic.

"What is that?? A minotaur?"

"Don't be silly, Roseluck, it doesn't have horns!"

"What if it's a mutant minotaur, like in the movies!? That one didn't have horns, either!"

"All right, Roseluck, Lily Valley, Daisy, that's enough out of all of you." Twilight spoke up, looking like a teacher dealing with misbehaving students. "He is not an 'it'. Neither is he a minotaur; and he most certainly is NOT a so-called 'mutant minotaur'! So, I strongly suggest the three of you actually think about the situation before you start running around yet again like headless chickens; all right!?"

"Right. Heh...sorry." They said, quickly slinking back behind their stall, though they still Spike wary looks.

"Sorry about that." She said, seeing the questioning look he gave her. "Those three have an unfortunate tendency to jump into panic mode when something unexpected turns up. I learned the hard way to head them off as soon as possible when it starts up."

"And last, but not least, Sweet Apple Acres, 'cept you can't see it from here." Pinkie said, not missing a beat once Twilight was done. "It's the biggest apple farm in this part of Equestria!"

"It's the only apple farm 'round here, Pinkie." Apple Bloom said. "Me an' AJ live there with our brother, Big Macintosh an' Granny Smith."

"Oh, right. Hm...what am I missing...? Oh! There's also Zecora's place, but it's in the Everfree Forest, so you can't see it from here either. She's a zebra and always talks in rhyme, too. Never thought to ask why though. Anyway, she knows a lot about potions, and medicine, and stuff like that." Pinkie abruptly stopped and looked around. "Hey, we're here."

Sure enough, a cursory look showed Spike that they'd made it to the station. "Wow, that...that was fast."

"Dibs on a window seat!" Rainbow, Scootaloo, and Pinkie all yelled in unison.

Author's Note

I'd intended for them to already be in Canter lot in this chapter, but for some reason, the impromptu tour just flowed out

Tales of Equestria

Spike stilled his nerves as best he could. Here he was, meeting the two rulers of Equestria. Two ladies that, at the very lease seemed able to rule simply by sheer presence. Yet, they gave off an almost demure air. Quickly girding his composure, he responded as best he could. "H-hi... oh wow...uh...sh-should I bow or kneel?"

The two looked at him in silence...before the one who'd been introduced as Luna giggled. "I think we made more of an impression than we planned, 'Tia."

"Looks that way." Celestia replied, the smile she had shifting to a friendlier mode. "Sorry about that. It's just something we do to look professional when meeting other races for the first time. We didn't intimidate you too much, did we?"

"A...a little." He admitted, his legs getting a little wobbly before Tempest and Applejack moved to help steady him.

"I have to admit, given that you didn't seem to even plan on coming to this world, you're taking things surprisingly well."

"Yeah. I mean, there is a little part of me that wants to scream 'SWEET CARAMELIZED LOVE CHILD OF BUDDHA AND VISHNU WITH A SIDE ORDER OF WHAT THE ACID-TRIPPING FUCKERY!' but I don't think that's really gonna do me any good right now."

Celestia shrugged slightly. "Understandable." She said, over Luna's giggles of 'so remembering that for our next poker night'

"Only question is..." Spike looked around and flopped his arms against his sides helplessly. "What do I do now?"

"Well, first off, now that the formalities are done..." Celestia reached behind her and the sound of a zipper could be heard. Luna followed suit with pulling hers down, giving him an unashamed view of the light blue nipples she was sporting, compared to her sister's cream white ones.

Quite the erotic tune began playing in his head as he watched the two slide the garments down off their bodies, letting them pool around their feet and leaving the two as naked as the others. Spike mentally debated on just how hard he should pray that they didn't see the tent starting to appear.

"Much better!" Celestia sighed, shaking her now bare hips. "Now..." She paused and cocked an eye, smirking a bit. "Heh, nice to know a couple mares our age can still get that kind of reaction out of a stallion. Eh, Luna?"

"Hey..! How come Trixie get a response like that!?" She pointed indignantly at Spike's erection.

"Maybe 'cause you probably aren't his type." Rainbow replied, earning a glare from her.

"More like I've been fighting this bastard ever since I first saw Fluttershy in the buff." He replied, listing every insult he could think up at his hormones. "Seeing the others naked didn't help much."

"I gave a guy a woody?" Pinkie asked. "Woot!"

"You...you mean he found me...?" Fluttershy blushed heavily, hiding behind her wings with a squeak.

"Was there any doubt?" Trixie puffed her chest out.

"Wh..." Spike looked at the girls; all of them seemed to be realizing something; and responding...rather positively.

"Well...Ah..Ah gotta admit, Ah ain't never had a bloke react to me like that." Applejack added, pulling her hat down a bit, though a bit of a smile could be seen.

"Heh, me neither." Rainbow buffed her nails on her chest. "Means my body is just that awesome."

"Again, still got it." Tempest looked smug.

Twilight and Moondancer were blushing up a storm.

"So, we actually got a stallion's attention? In that way?" Sweetie Belle had a silly grin and blush of her own, along with Apple Bloom and Scootaloo.

"Well, I must admit, it is rather flattering, darling." Rarity replied.

"Heh...y-yeah." Barb added. "This is kinda new for me."

Starlight just looked at him, cheeks bright pink.

"You...none of you...you're not appalled or shocked??"

"Actually, given how scarce males are, and the competition some towns have over those that are unattached, being found sexually attractive by one is considered a compliment." Tempest said, getting a couple nods.

"Ok...y-you lost me." Spike called out, any embarrassment long gone, "What do you mean 'scarce males'?? I mean, I was wondering why there were hardly any guys around, but I was figuring they were just elsewhere." He quickly realized that his theory was very wrong when Celestia spoke up.

"Spike, for the last seven hundred years, males have been extremely rare for us and nearly all our neighboring countries. The only exception is the dragons, and their males equal about a quarter of their population."

"C-come again...? Wait...but I saw lots of ponies..." He said, gesturing to the ones currently in the room."

"Thankfully, we, as well as other races like the griffons, yak, deer, and zebras have spells that can temporarily swap genders for female couples that want a child. However, due to the difficulty and power required for that kind of transformation magic, only the country's strongest magic users have access to the specific information, and the spell doesn't guarantee conception. Even then, the child is always female. Colts require an actual male."

"Oh...well...that's actually a little depressing when you think about it." He said, finding a chipped floor tile fascinating at the moment. "Um...you said something about competition between...?"

"Yes." Luna took over from here. "Because of the spell's limitations, some towns can run a risk of losing their population if there's no more stallions. So, they tend to resort to desperate measures to keep the town going; usually by enticing or bribing stallions to stay, especially if they're unattached. However...there have been occasions where underhanded tactics have been employed; threats...spells or potions to keep them there...even a couple of abductions." She gave Spike a pointed look "Actually, this is a good forewarning for you. I'm going to guess that you were not currently dating anyone back where you're from."

He shook his head. "Not really...my classes took up a lot of my time."

"Single, and you obviously appear old enough to be familiar with sex.

"Not really...I mean I know it, but the farthest I ever got was one date a couple years ago where I accidentally grabbed her butt when I tripped...and got slapped for it." He absentmindedly rubbed the cheek in question, and missed the look of outrage that crossed the faces of a couple of the mares.

"Untouched, and to be honest..." She stepped a little closer, looking him over in a -if he was willing to imagine it - appreciative manner. "Quite exotic. By those three factors alone, I can name at least three towns that would try their hardest to get you to leave wherever you're currently staying and go live with them, and odds are they would be unwilling to take 'no' for an answer."

"OVER MY DEAD BODY/THE BUCK THEY WILL!" Spike and a couple mares jumped at the declaration. A look at them showed one had definitely been Trixie, when the other was...

"Land sakes, Fluttershy!" Applejack wiggled a finger in her ear. "A lil warnin' next time? What's got you riled up anyway?"

"If some harpy thinks they can just waltz off with Spike, they'll have to pry him from my cold dead...!" She stopped and looked around, blushing when it dawned what she was doing. "I...I mean...ehehe..."

"I think we get the idea, Fluttershy." Barb said.

'I don't...' Spike thought, but kept it to himself. Seeing Fluttershy's growing embarrassment had him deciding a change of subject was in order. "Say, those stained glass windows, they look pretty old."

"A few are." Celestia said, thankfully catching on. "More than a third of them were transported from the old palace, located in what's now the Everfree Forest. a couple are well over a thousand years old."

He whistled "They look in pretty good..." He trailed off when he looked at one of the window. "Did someone mess up that window?" He pointed to the one in question.

"Which one?" The others followed Celestia as she looked to where he was pointing; an image of a male unicorn with a long beard and stereotypical wizard clothes. He was also standing on all fours. "That's Starswirl the Bearded. What's wrong with it?"

"He has four legs in that, and you all...."

"Oh! I see what you're talking about. It's kind of funny in a way. A millennium ago, except for most dragons, we were all on four legs. Griffons, elk, buffalo...everyone. But for some reason, our bodies began to change. Each successive generation was born more and more bipedal, with gradually developing hands, feet, and bodies like you see." She performed a quick twirl on her heel. "Unfortunately, as that happened, fewer and fewer males were being born. Some suspect that whatever caused us to change, took most our male population in 'trade'. There've been attempts to try and balance the population out again, thinking it was a spell or some kind of curse. However nothing was successful."

"Oh" Spike managed to get out. That was a lot to take in; first an alien, and now possibly some kind of rare commodity if he wasn't careful."That's a hell of a transition."

"Luckily, we've gotten accustomed to it." Luna added. "So! Any thoughts on where you're going to be living while you're here?"

Intermission: Fast Food and Fillies Feeling Frisky

"You really want to live with us in Ponyville!?" Pinkie bounced, looking at Spike excitedly after he'd made his residential choice.

"Yeah. I mean, it's where I know the most people...er, ponies. And in all honesty, I was never really one for urban life." He responded, looking around the city a little. "Always feel a little cramped."

Applejack gave him a friendly thump on the back. "Ah can second that, sugarcube! Gimmie an open field--"

*RRRLLLRURRR*

"Uh...hehe" Spike looked around sheepishly as his stomach made itself known. "Guess I should've gotten something to eat before we got on the train."

"What!?" Applejack and Pinkie blurted out, glaring at him. "Yer comin' with me right now, mister!" The farmpony's tone brooked no argument as she grabbed his hand and started pulling him to the closest place to eat, with Pinkie pushing him from behind. "Ah told ya Ah intend to make sure ya eat." She showed a surprising amount of strength for her size.

"A-applejack, calm down!" He yelped, trying to keep up. 'How can these ponies be so little and this quick!?' "It's not the first time..." The look she gave him told him that probably wasn't the best thing to say.

"Oh, you are DEFINITELY living in Ponyville!" Came the response as she and Pinkie bustled him into the donut shop. Next thing he knew, he was on a stool at the counter, a plate of sandwiches and a couple bottles of what looked like sparkling cider in front of him. The rest of the group filing in shortly after.

"Going that long without even a snack isn't good for you, Spikey!" Pinkie spoke up, sitting on one side of him with Applejack on the other. "I'm no dietnation...diet tactic...diet tech..."

"Dietitian?" He offered.

"Yeah, what you said. I'm not one, but if I learned anything working at Sugar Cube Corner, it's that!"

"An' doin' it more than once is plumb crazy!" Applejack added. "Now, yer gonna finish that even if Ah gotta tie ya to that seat, got it?"

Part of him wanted to protest a little...but, they did have their hearts in the right place, though going to this extent for someone they'd just met surprised him. Granted he was hungry, and those sandwiches looked pretty good. Finally, he shunted the 'protest' bit off to do something else and took a bite. 'Huh, not bad, this a club? Tastes like there's french fried onions in it.'

While Spike ate, the girls had scooted off to the side and were having a discussion of their own.

"Ok, he's decided to live in Ponyville." Twilight said. "That leaves one question; where's he's going to stay?"

Trixie snorted. "Then it's settled. He will stay with me..."

"So you can jump him the moment you're alone?" Fluttershy retorted. "He's been perfectly safe at my house these last few days."

"That's rich, Miss 'pry him from my cold dead fingers'! I'm sure the fact you only have one bed as well doesn't enter..."

"Which means we'll be finding him a DIFFERENT place to say." Twilight spoke back up, giving the two mares a look until they relented. "There are a couple unoccupied houses in town, but he's got nothing but the clothes on his back."

"Something I intend to rectify posthaste." Rarity added. "We have a guest room at the boutique, but I've been using it more for storage recently. It would take us a couple of day to get everything out and clean it up even with magic."

"Aj, ain't we still got that makeshift room up in the attic?" Apple Bloom asked. "Just gotta let Granny know ahead of time."

"I thought Granny Smith made your attic off-limits after Sweetie's attempt at making an apple fritter ran up there." Starlight said.

"Still haven't caught that darn thing." Applejack muttered, punching her fist. "Ah still owe it fer tryin' to eat my ear."

"I'd offer, but he can't fly." Rainbow shrugged.

"Why not just let him stay at the palace." Barb said. "I mean, we have enough rooms to house more than half of the town."

"She's got a point." Tempest: added. "Besides, we all have access to the place so we can help him get used to life here, plus he's got protection from stallion poachers there."

Those two words quickly caused darkened looks to cross the face of every mare there. Poachers, considered the lowest of the low among mares. Thieves that used any means, no mater how manipulative or dishonest, to take males from a town. Ponyville was fairly protective of her boys, but still...

"Ok, we'll offer him a place at the palace once we get our stuff here done....Moondancer? You ok?" Twilight asked, seeing her friend fidgeting some.

"W-well...there's something I've wanting to ask you girls since we got here, but didn't know..." She asked, blushing furiously.

"What?"

Moondancer sighed, then clamped her hands together in a pleading gesture, "Pleasepleasepleae! Let me have the first time with him!?"

"Say what!?" The group near-yelped in unison.

"Buck that noise! Trixie's already called dibs!"

"Dammit, Trixie!" Twilight glared at the stage performer. "This is a sentient, sapient being, not a sex toy! And a virgin to boot, so how about a little self-control!? If he wants to sleep with you, fine, but let HIM make the choice!"

Trixie tried to stand defiantly, but it quickly turned into a pout. "Fine..."

Barb stepped closer. "Moondancer...we all just met him. Why...?"

"I know...! But...if he's living in Ponyville, you'll all access to him twenty-four-seven, and the best I can do is make weekly visits! Plus...I...I can't put my finger on it, but there's something about him...I feel safe...and..." She looked out the shop's front window nervously. "There...there's also a stallion here in Canterlot, named Chaser. H-he has a...a taste for virgins and sees 'no' as just a temporary answer. If..." She let out a quavering exhale. "If they don't want him right off the bat, he works on wearing them down until they finally accept." She grimaced. "I don't like him at all; he's an arrogant creep who brags about how many 'cherries he's popped'. Because there's only about seven males here, though, he gets away with it. And, I-I'm worried that he's set his sights on me."

"What a dickwad!" Rainbow and Tempest growled in unison.

"Oh, Moon..." Twilight and Barb hugged her. "Why didn't you say anything before?"

"I managed to steer clear of him normally, except lately I've seen him looking my way with this leer that makes my skin crawl. I try to ignore him, but I'm worried he'll start his tactics soon."

"Ok...I can't guarantee how things'll go, but maybe if you talk to him first." Twilight glanced back at Spike. "Just go slow until we're sure he's comfortable with this."

"I...I can work with that." Fluttershy nodded.

"Very well...I can wait, but not long." Trixie crossed her arms.

"Ah...I needed that." Spike called up, turning around to see them all looking his way. "So...what next?"

Recollection and The First.

Entry No. 3, Day 4. Date: still unknown (Note: Ask one of the girls in the morning)

Well, I've been in Equestria for the better part of a week now, and in all honesty, I probably should be surprised that I still really haven't panicked about being in a completely different word, aside from that fainting spell, at least. But, like I told the princesses, a freak out isn't going to help now.

After eating my fill, the girls decided to go and get some things done while we were still there. I have a feeling I should have expected it when Rarity pulled me to what she said was her clothing store's Canterlot branch. Looked like she was prepping this new wardrobe for me earlier than I expected...

"Isn't it a little late to make clothes?" Spike asked as they entered the shop.

"Nonsense, darling!" Rarity chirped, snatching up a tape measure."This is actually my favorite time of day to brainstorm new designs."

"At least until I have to remind her it's her turn to fix dinner." Sweetie added, getting a look from her sister.

"Well...yes... but right now we can go ahead get your new clothes started on. Sassy! Are you available?"

A slender - but surprisingly buxom - pale cerulean mare with a vermilion, amber, and orange mane trotted in from the back, wearing black and gold thigh-highs and gloves. "Rarity? oh, I didn't even hear you come i-popping pinstripes!" She yelped when her eyes landed on Spike. "What in Equestria....!?"

"Um, hi?" He said, trying not to watch her breasts bounce some as she screeched to a halt.

"Oh, this is Spike. Fluttershy found him unconscious near Everfree earlier this week." Rarity replied, giving his side a friendly pat.

"'He'..? Wait...your friend found a stallion just out there, just like that!?"

"W-well, I saw him falling down a hill." Fluttershy spoke up. "He was knocked out by the time I reached him."

"Which brings us to why we're here, aside from my wanting to see how things have been going so far."

"Um, nothing groundbreaking, but fairly well." Sassy replied, still staring at Spike. "I was thinking up some designs for new work aprons when you called."

"That's good. As for the other reason...as you can see, he's certainly not local. And given how little he knows of Equestria outside of what he's seen or been told so far, the poor thing is a long, long way from home with little more than the clothes on his back. So, I figured while we're in Canterlont, I can get a head start on getting him some new clothes."

Sassy chuckled lightly. "Well, I've had some out-of-towners buy a few things from here, but this takes the pincushion." She looked back up at him, looking a bit more relaxed now that the surprise had worn off. "Any style in particular that catches your fancy, big boy?"

"Uh...not really...mostly just wore what was comfortable." He replied, hoping the two fashion-loving mares didn't take it the wrong way. but to be honest, archaeology was a dirty job sometimes, so comfort over fashion had become a rule of thumb to him.

"Well, we can start simple for now." Rarity draped the measure around her neck. "Cotton, perhaps."

Either Rarity was one hell of a seamstress or she and Sassy worked really well together because they had a couple of items ready in less than an hour. Though, she probably multitasked with magic since she was a unicorn. Anyway, she seemed really pleased with herself when she handed me a small bundle and ushered me into one of the dressing rooms.

When I found what she'd given me, however...

Spike's face literally glowed as he stared at the 'garment' he'd been given. In his hands hung nothing more than a leather belt with two panels of cotton cloth attached to it.

A loincloth...she'd given him a loincloth! His mind raced at the implications. The logical, and slightly calmer, part of his mind reasoned that, given what he'd seen so far, this was quite possibly standard male attire in Equestria.

The...less calmer part, on the other had was freaking out. 'How the hell can this be 'standard!? We might as well be walking around naked! She can't really be expecting us to wear this, can she!?'

'Think about it. The mares wear only shoes and accessories. Tempest only wears more because she grew up outside the country, most likely in an area when clothes are more common.' The logical side responded.

'Yeah, so?'

'So, considering the male population is so astoundingly low, it's reasonable to figure that a good many mares - the ones not currently in relationships, anyway - would possibly be somewhat starved for male attention.'

'Ok, but what's that gotta do with the loincloth??'

'If that's the case, don't you think a stallion walking around in the buff would be....I don't know...distracting to them?'

'I...I guess that makes sense. So, you think she just made....that for us 'cause she's familiar with it?'

'Or from habit. Either way, she looked pretty happy when she handed it over.'

'Are...are we still gonna put it on??'

'Regardless off how fast she was, Rarity evidently put a lot of effort in making this for us. Don't you think it'd be a little rude if we didn't at least try it on?'

'Fine...but still...'

"I don't have the body for this thing...!" He whimpered, getting undressed.

A few minutes later, Rarity knocked on the door. "Spike, are you decent, darling?"

"I...I guess. This is kinda new for me." He replied, mentally thanking her for adding weights to the panels so they'd say in place.

"Oh, don't tell me you buy off the rack?" She asked, opening the door. "Granted, it's easier in the larger cities, but there's nothing like--" She stopped dead when she looked at him. "Bwaaaaahhhhhhh......."

"Something wrong?" He asked, noticing her cheeks turn bright red and her horn spark a little. 'I did put it on right, didn't I?'

"Sweet Celestia's tits..." She whispered, trailing her eyes up and down him before blinking and shaking her head violently. "NO! No, definitely not! Hehe...um...Spike, what's that you're wearing with the cloth?"

"My underwear." He replied, feeling a little funny at the way she was staring

"Under-wear...?" She asked, mulling the term over like it was a new ice cream flavor. "What an odd word...anyway, heh, that's not quite how it's worn normally. Here, let me." Her horn glowed his boxer suddenly appeared in her hand.

"EEP!" Spike squeaked, feeling the sudden draft around his privates, the piece of cloth now the only thing protecting him from exposure.

"Now..." Once again, she came to an abrupt stop. "Oh...oh my...." Her voice was barely audible as she stared at the loincloth.

"R-Rarity...?" He asked, trying his best to act calm and not cover himself up in a panic. 'When in Rome, Spike! You were training to be an archaeologist, remember? Respecting other cultures comes with the territory!'

"Oh! N-nothing, darling. Just dick-deciding on what styles to make for you."

"Rarity, has he got one of them on? We wanna see!" Tempest's voice called out from the front.

"I..I dunno.." He said, shuffling his feet uneasily.

Apparently his voice must've carried out, because this time it was Twilight. "Come on, Spike. We just want to see how it look on you. None of us will laugh, I promise."

"Though we may snicker if she gave you something pink." Rainbow added.

"I..."

"Spike. It'll be fine." Rarity said reassuringly. "I've known these girls for years, and while we all have our flaws, meanspirited isn't one of them. Besides..." She headed out of the room, so he never saw her lick her lips. "Laughing is the last thing they'll do.

"A...all right." Taking a deep breath, he steeled himself as best he could and followed her out. The front proved to be a little warmer, thankfully, though he wasn't fully prepared for the reception.

"Viola!" Rarily declared, biting her lip with a blush.

"Eep!" Fluttershy's hands shot to her mouth as her wings popped open violently, lifting her a few inches off the ground.

Applejack ran a hand over her chest, and Rainbow's wings opened almost as fast, both whistling in unison. "Buck me silly"

Tempest gave him a half-lidded look, licking her lips. "Yum.."

Trixie and Pinkie just stood there, drooling.

Moondancer stared stared at him, horn sparking and biting her lip, and glasses steaming over.

The CMC seemed to be suffering everything; all three were blushing, with Scootaloo's wings popped open, Sweetie's horn sparking, and Apple Bloom having a visible nosebleed. Twilight was having a similar issue as well

Starlight whimpered and bit her finger.

"Unf...!" Barb growled, face red and her tail standing straight up like a flagpole.

"Basting and bindings!" Sassy's jaw dropped. "Where'd you get all THAT!"

"Huh?" Spike looked at her. "Get what?"

"Ah...Ah thinks she means yer..." Apple Bloom voice caught in her throat as she pointed at his torso.

"How'd you get ripped!?" Sweetie blurted, her face almost glowing.

"Ripped...? Wha..??" Spike looked at his arm. There was a bit of definition, but nothing he'd consider major. To be honest there were a lot of guys at the college a lot bigger than him. "It's nothing major, I did a lot of odd jobs to pay for college. Besides, an archaeologist's gotta be in decent shape to deal with excavation and possible harsh conditions-"

He was cut off by a loud 'squee', courtesy of Rainbow Dash. "Did he say what I think he said!?"

"What??" He backed up a little. Was one of those words considered something vulgar by pegasus standards or something?

"Dashie's a big fan of archaeology." Pinkie wiped her face off.

"Mainly because her favorite book series, Daring Do, stars one." Trixie added, doing the same.

Before Spike could respond, Rainbow's face was pressed against his, with an excited grin to boot. "You're an archaeologist too!?"

"In training, technically." He said, trying not to blush at the abrupt closeness. "Still had another six months before I found myself here."

She 'squee'd again. "Oh, I am SO taking you to meet her; first chance I get!"

"Meet who?"

"Daring Do, duh!"

"Let's just say the two became friends under interesting circumstances." Twilight said, trying to make her wings go back down.

Now, Spike wasn't too sure why a supposedly professional archaeologist would be willing to hang out with one who hadn't even gotten his credentials yet. But, Rainbow seemed hellbent on it. "Ok."

"Believe me, you won't regret it!"

"Yes, now that that's out of the way, you can change back." Rarity said, handing him his boxers back over the chorus of 'aww's from a few of the others.

"Thanks. I mean, it's great you're willing to make me some extra clothes, but I should probably ease myself into it."

"I got something he can 'ease' himself into...rawr!" One of them mumbled. Who, he didn't know. But for now, he was just glad to wear something more familiar. As he passed Rarity, though, he heard something that send a wave of embarrassed dread through him:

"Sassy, make a note; he needs bigger panels on the others."

Took me more than a half hour before I could bring myself to come back out of the changing room...and even then it was a struggle to look any of them in the face. Still don't know if I should've been more mortified at learning a room full of girls could see my junk, or...well, kinda flattered that they seemed to like what they saw.

It was starting to get a little late by then, so I thought that was the end of the day and they were going to either head back to the train or find a place to spend the night.

I was right on them spending the night, what I didn't expect was for them to head to Twilight's parent's house. At first I wasn't sure how they were gonna fit a group that big, even though the place looked a decent size outside; much less get the ok from her parents.

Color me surprised when they let everyone in. Strangely enough, her father, who Twilight'd introduced as Night Light, took meeting me in stride, or as he put it:

"After the changeling invasion, my oldest daughter marrying Princess Cadance, my youngest becoming an alicorn and Princess of Friendship, Tirek, and becoming a grandfather...finding out she's made friends with a stallion from another world is refreshingly mild."

Of course...then I met her, Twilight Velvet...except I didn't know that at the time.

Spike looked between Twilight and the shapely mare standing in the kitchen doorway. She had a light grey coat with violet and light grey mane, wearing only a pair of striped knee-high socks. "Um, Twilight?"

"Hm?"

"I thought your sister was at that Crystal Empire place."

Twilight stood there for a moment before she and the new mare started giggling. "Gleaming Shield is, Spike. This is Twilight Velvet; my mother."

"Oh." He said, having it click a second later, his face reddening. "Ohhh. Uh...heh that explains why she's so cute."

"S-Spike!" Twilight squeaked, blushing brightly.

Velvet just grinned. "Well, your new boyfriend just earned himself a few points."

"Boyfriend...?" Spike paused, missing the grins the other girls were giving him.

"Mooom!" Twilight yelped, blushing brighter. "We're just friends!"

"Suuure, Twilight." Velvet replied, not believing it for a second as she gave Spike a knowing look.

Once Velvet stopped messing with her daughter (and I guess me, by extension?), she and Pinkie went to fix the others a bite to eat. Meanwhile, Night Light had something he wanted me to know.

"Spike, right?" He started once it was just the two of them. "Before you say anything, just hear me out, ok? Now, this isn't some cliche' 'stay away from my daughter' speech or something. She's fought a magic eating centaur, she can handle herself. Besides, I can tell from the way you reacted to Velvet that you aren't that kinda guy."

"Yeah...I mean, your wife and daughter do look very much alike..." Spike gulped. It didn't matter if Night Light was shorter, this was a father, with two daughters that he cared about deeply.

"True. I've been told Gleaming takes a little after me." Light grinned. "Anyway, I just wanna give you some advice." He set a friendly hand on Spike's shoulder. "I saw how those young mares are all looking at you, and I just have this to offer...run."

Spike: looked at him in confusion. "Run?"

"Look, you've probably already noticed that males are in very short supply. In that regard, it's common for multiple mares to hook up with one. I almost had that happen to me while I was dating Velvet. The only problem is, when that happens, that can get the attention of others if they aren't after a different stallion." He looked back at where the mares were. "And believe me when I say a mare can wear you out when she's in the mood. Hell, Velvet alone is enough to leave me exhausted, while she's ready for more. Now,I'm not saying this to scare you off or anything. But, you currently have fourteen mares that, by some twist of fate I doubt either of us can fathom, you have earned the attraction of. For the sake of your body and pelvis..."

Spike shook his head. "I can't just run...after everything they've done so far." He replied. "Admittedly, Trixie is a bit forward, but that just seems to be her. I mean, Fluttershy could've just left me laying where she found me, but she didn't, Rarity's already started working on getting me some new clothes, though..." He gestured at the loincloth Nightlight had on. "The local attire's going to take getting used to, and Applejack and Pinkie were genuinely upset when they found out I hadn't eaten all day." He let out a weak laugh. "And the look Applejack gave me when I let out that it wasn't the first time."

Night Light smirked and shook his head. "Well, in that case, I recommend you stock up on energy drinks and pain relievers."

His last bit of advice's left me a little unnerved, but he was probably kidding.

As he finished his newest entry, Spike looked around. After they'd eaten, the group separated into Twilight and her sister's old bedrooms, flipping a coin to see who went where. Like at Fluttershy's house, he was ready to sleep on the couch, but they weren't having any of it, shoving the coin in his hand and saying "Flip." The end result: he was currently relaxed in a corner of Gleaming's room, surrounded by the CMC, Moondancer, Starlight, Fluttershy and Tempest. They'd played a rock-paper-scissors to see who got the bed (Scootaloo won).

A look at the clock showed it was well past midnight. Moving a bit to get comfortable, he leaned back and was about to let sleep claim him when a soft voice spoke up. "Spike...?"

"Hm...Moondancer?" He sat up. His eyes had finally adjusted to the dim moonlight pouring in through the window, so he had little trouble spying her silhouetted in the darkness, still wearing her sweater as she fidgeted with the hem. "Something wrong?"

"No...I-I was wondering if I could ask you something." She stepped into view, the light showing she was looking at him shyly, her cheeks pinking.

'Huh, now that I'm getting a better look at her, she's really pretty.' He thought. "Sure, what's-" He paused when, in an unexpectedly bold move, she sat down in his lap, straddling his waist. "...up?"

The First Claim

Moondancer's voice was barely audible, her face bright red as she answered his question. "Will you make me your mare?"

"C-come again...?" The idea of making sure his ears were cleaned out was tempting to make sure he'd correctly heard the mare in his lap.

"I...I w-want...to be one of your mares."

WARNING!!!!

//S: Spike/Thought.exe has stopped working. Attempting to restore.
//S:....
//S:....
//S:....
//S: Unable to restore. Abort/Retry/Fail?

Rebooting...

Spike blinked and shook his head to try and reset things. "One of my mares...?"

She simply gave a brief nod. looking up at him hopefully.

'Wha...ok, Twilight's dad did say that multiple mares would normally hook up with a stallion due to the massive gender ratios...but she just met me!' "Why me?" He asked. "I mean, don't get me wrong; you're really attractive. But, you're bound to have better prospects then my skinny dome."

"Well..." She shyly ran her fingertips across his bare chest, biting her lip as she did. "It's not uncommon for a mare to find a quick attraction to a stallion, what with how few of you there are." She let out a small laugh, tracing her finger around his abs. "Plus...given how you've acted so far...I-I think I made a good choice."

Spike grinned a little. "Well, can't say I'm not flattered, but..you know I'll be living in Ponyville."

"Yeah, but I tend to come down and visit the girls on weekends. The train between there and Canterlot runs pretty frequently, and I get vacation days the bookstore I work at." It was here she paused, looking a little hesitant. "There's also another reason. One that's....kind of selfish."

She began telling him about a fellow in Canterlot with a taste for virgins. Spike frowned; it was douchy, but what got his ire was that the the guy didn't consider 'no' an answer. This 'Chaser' reminded him disturbingly of one of his relatives; one of his father's cousins...a man he hated with a passion.

The bastard had a habit of going after a gal that caught his eye until she gave in, seeing the things that would make a decent person back off; lack of interest, a significant other, a restraining order...as far as he was concerned, were just pesky rules to work around. He mentally grinned as he remembered hearing about the last girl he'd gone after...he got a little too forceful in 'putting the moves on her', in front of her girlfriend no less...he learned the hard way that both practiced Savate. Last he heard, the guy was still being treated for a shattered jaw and two ruptured testicles.

The idea that someone like that had their eyes on Moondancer did NOT set well with him. Bringing himself out of his memory, he realized he'd been recalling it a bit longer than he thought. Moondancer was looking at him with a hopeful expression, but there was a little bit of worry mixed in.

'Ahhh...' He thought, smirking a little. She was serious, and he did find her attractive. Besides, this was going to be his home for the foreseeable future. So, he threw caution to the four winds.

"How's this for an answer?" Gently cupping her chin, he pulled her in for a kiss.

She tensed up in surprise for a second before relaxing happily into it, moaning slightly as she felt him slide an arm around her waist and pull her close.

After several seconds, they finally separated. "So, you're really serious about this, huh?"

She just blushed and nodded, tugging at the bottom of her sweater, but stopped when she felt his fingers hook it.

"Then I guess this'll be a few firsts for the both of us." He grinned, lifting the bottom of her sweater slightly before stopping. "Um, you want me to, or...?"

"L-let's just leave it. It can be annoying to get off sometimes...besides..." She pushed it into her cleavage, giving him a view of her breasts, two light tan nipples topping the soft orbs.

"Wow..." Spike stared. The others were nice too, but something told him he was the first guy she'd bared them to.

"You like them...?" She asked, her blush intensifying.

"They're beautiful." He managed to get out, watching them bounce a little as she let out a cute little squeak, her horn sparking a little, but it abruptly flashed. "You ok?" He asked. "Your....horn...." It was then he noticed the draft again, and Moondancer was looking down, her face a mix of shocked surprise and awe. His face went red when he followed her gaze.

She'd teleported his boxes off like Rarity did, except now he was at full mast between her legs.

"I-I'm sorry..!" She said in a squeaky whisper. "My magic get...gets away from me sometimes when I get excited...!"

He forced a grin. "It...it's ok...it was an accident...j-just surprised me." He tried to remain calm, but now he could feel her body heat as she sat, almost naked in his now unclothed lap. The way she was staring at his erection didn't help much.

"Um...is...is this normal sized for stallions where you're from?" She asked, gently tapping the head and watching it twitch reflexively.

"W-well...the nurse said I was a little o...a little above average on my last physical." He replied, fighting a fidget as she poked his penis.

"'A little above'??" She squeaked, looking at him in disbelief. "This is nothing like what I've seen in med books..." Spike was about to protest, thinking she was about to complain, until she added in a whisper. "Oh Celestia....I'm going to be walking funny for a while from this monster....!"

Now, if this was an anime, Spike's face probably would've been like a neon light from his blush at the unexpected compliment. Instead, he just laughed weakly. "Heh....um, thanks?"

She continued staring at it, absentmindedly licking her lips a bit. " Um, can...can I try something?" She asked, lifting her gaze towards his face.

"S-sure." He watched her scoot back a little, wondering what she had in mind. He got his answer when she leaned over and gently took hold of him at the base, her touch making him let out a hiss.

"Oh! Th-that didn't hurt, did it!?" She looked up in alarm.

"I'm ok..." He breathed, giving her a reassuring smile. "Just a new experience." 'God, those hands of hers are soft! Feels like freaking silk!'

"O-ok." She leaned in a bit closer, the proximity giving her a chance to get his scent. She found herself inhaling deeply, shuddering a little in pleasure.

"Oh, sorry..." Spike grimaced a little. "Haven't really had a chance to get a shower since I arrived..."

"No...!" She blushed harder. "You smell good....really good." She fought the urge to let her hormones take over and shove her face in his groin. 'Oh Faust...are all his race like this!?' She squirmed a little, feeling her arousal grow. 'I'm already wet just from his scent...!" She quickly took a deep breath through her mouth to try and settle her nerved. "Ah...ok, I read once that fore....foreplay is essential for first times...I-I hope it feels good." She leaned down and gave the head a lick.

"Haa!" Spike gasped, thrusting slightly on reflex. "Wow...heh..."

"Hmm." Moondancer smacked her lips. "You taste like potato chips." She giggled. "A little salty, but nice."

"Thanks." He blushed, idly wondering what she might taste like. That thought, and any other for that matter, was obliterated when she wrapped her lips around the head and started lightly suckling on it.

"Sweet crispy-aahh..." He let out a low moan, his eyes rolling back slightly. Thankfully, he was against the wall so he was propped up some. He had to set his jaw to keep the next one from getting out when he remembered the others who were still asleep and quickly made a 'gotta be quiet' motion to her.

She nodded and inched down on him, squeaking happily at how he looked to be enjoying it. 'He likes it!' *squee!* 'I KNEW I could do it! Ok, Moondancer, just go slow and easy. And make sure your stupid gag reflex doesn't kick in! You've heard stories about mares accidentally biting a stallion on his penis...just...owie.' She descended to what felt like a safe amount and lathed her tongue around his shaft. 'Wonder if I should tell the others how yummy he tastes? Hm...nah, let them find out.' She let out another little happy squeak and started to bob on him like a popsicle, using her hand on what she couldn't get in her mouth.

"Oh god...that feels amazing...!" Spike moaned, running his hand through her hair, which she seemed to enjoy, since he noticed her tail wag a little. 'Damn, that's adorable...!'

Moondancer's eyes slowly closed as she continued sucking, a strangely welcome feeling of bliss at pleasuring her stallion...her stallion. "Oh!* She sat up abruptly, wiping a bit of saliva off her lips. "I almost forgot!" Her cheeks pinked in embarrassed at her goof.

"W-what?" Spike asked, still riding the high from her blowjob.

She scooted back up, a mix of anxiousness and desire crossing her face. "You...you still have to claim me as your mare."

He paused; he knew this was probably just a cultural thing, but...it still felt odd. "Claim..?"

"well, Rainbow's said it's kinkier saying 'claiming your stallion', but..." She moved closer until he could feel her nethers just touching his shaft and scrotum. "I want you to take me." She leaned in, her breasts pressing against his chest. "Please, Spike."

Maybe it was the almost pleading tone in her voice or the fact that she was plainly asking him, but something sealed his resolve. "They say the first time can hurt some for a girl. You ready?"

She nodded instantly. "I know. Thankfully, I've taken enough spills and tumbles over the years to know my hymen's not there anymore, so I'll be ok." She finished with a quick kiss on the lips. "Thank you."

Helping her lift up so she could position herself, Spike couldn't help but notice something; either he was stronger than he thought, or ponies were surprisingly light. He had no trouble picking her up.

She squatted down until he was just at her entrance, and with an exhale, started slowly lowering into him. "S-Sweet Celestia!" She bit her lip to keep from squealing as she felt her sex stretching to accommodate his size. It was a little uncomfortable, but the feel of his shaft scraping against her walls more than made up for it. She moaned in delight as she descended down his length, the increasing feeling of fullness already driving her closer to the brink. After what felt like Celestia knows when, she finally felt him hilt inside her. "Luna's quim...!" She gasped, if that was just penetration, then what was the real deal going to be like!?

Spike, on the other hand, had gone nearly cross-eyed by the time she was down, a goofy smile on his face at the feel of her tunnel clamping down on him. "I..I'll second that...! Never thought I'd say this, but...Moondancer, you are tight as hell! And I mean that in every positive way!"

"Th-thank you.." She panted. "Mmm, to quote Rainbow...that was awesome!"

"I'll second that one too." They both chuckled a little as they let themselves get accustomed to each other.

After a moment, Moondancer let out a relaxed sigh. "Ok...are you ready?" She asked, giving him a cheeky grin.

"As I'll ever be." He replied, letting her put his hands on her hips.

Taking that as her signal, Moondancer began to gently bounce on him, rather happily, if she'd ever tell anyone. He met her efforts with light thrusts, being careful not to let himself get carried away and accidentally hurt her. Soon the air was toned with moans and the soft impact of flesh as their bodies met each time on her way down. Accompanied by the various squeals and squeaks she let out, along with Spike's slight grunts and hisses.

Unfortunately, since both were virgins, neither currently had the staying power to go for very long. Both of them soon felt the growling boil of a climax in their loins. They tried to continue farther, but Moondancer was forced to bury her face in his chest to muffle the scream her orgasm brought on, and Spike fought down a growl as he gave her one final, firm thrust, feeling himself spill into her.

She quickly wrapped her legs around him, feeling a couple more spurts before it was over. "Oh....oh my Faust.." She whimpered, face still buried in his chest. "That was amazing!"

"You can say that agai-mmph!" He was cut off when she captured his lips in another kiss. This one much passionate than before.

"Mmm..." She purred as they separated. "Thank you...my stallion."

"Heh, you're welcome...my mare." 'Huh, where'd that come from?' He decided to worry about that later. "We should probably go get cleaned up."

"Can we stay like this for now, please?" She asked, wriggling affectionately in his lap, still impaled on him. "You feel really nice in me."

"I..." Spike stopped when she nuzzled against him; the look of blissful contentment, combined with the air of security thoroughly thrashed any objects he might've considered. "Ok." He responded, putting both arms around her.

With that, the pair relaxed in a sleepy afterglow.

Meanwhile, Scootaloo bit her lip to hide the whine that threatened to come out as she watched them cuddle, mentally thanking her luck for being a light sleeper. 'Holy thunderheads, that was hotter than the time me and Sweetie experimented! Faust, I hope my turn comes soon.' She thought, licking her lips as she continued to pump two fingers deep into her own slit under the covers.

A New Home.

Despite the fact that he was sure they'd been quiet, Spike couldn't help but worry that he and Moondancer had unknowingly woken up some of the others. Ever since the group had gotten up that morning, he'd been noticing that they've all been giving them both funny looks; even when Twilight's parents insisted they at least stay for breakfast, he could have sworn he saw both Velvet and Night Light grin when they looked at him and Moondancer.

They were now on the train back to Ponyville (Moondancer apparently was on vacation right now, so she was coming back with the group) and he was checking out the early morning view.

It was also then that they struck.

"So, Moondancer, have a...pleasant night?" Starlight asked, grinning.

He couldn't see her, but he heard the loud squeak the bespectacled unicorn let out.

"Yeah, I hope things weren't too 'hard' for you last night." Barb added, looking over the seat at her, wagging her brow to boot.

Spike froze. 'No way! How? They c-couldn't have heard us..could they...??'

"Hope you were comfy!" Pinkie giggle for a moment. "Wait...are we talking about her sleeping or the fact we can tell she did the naughty with Spikey?"

"And there goes the fun." Rainbow sighed, looking at Spike. "Yes, we can smell it on both of you." She poked her own nose. "Literally."

'Aw...scheisse!' He cursed mentally. 'Should've thought about that!'

She smirked a little. "Ah, don't worry about it." She waved it off, seeing the way he was turning red. "You won't believe how many times I've smelled Lyra and Bon Bon when they get frisky."

"Wha...? You...you make it sound like you'd seen them have sex outside."

"Pretty much." Applejack joined in, propping herself up on the back of his seat. "It's not really a big deal, long as you don't do it where kids can see ya."

"Wha..? S-seriously??"

He was answered with varying sounds of confirmation.

"I'm not a hundred percent sure how it came about, but since we never really developed a worry over clothing, it just sorta bled over into sex." Starlight shrugged. "But like AJ said, long as it's not in view of kids, there's no harm done."

"Oh...ok..." Spike hesitated, doing his best to let it sink in.

"You'll get used to it." Applejack patted his shoulder. "Now, spill it, filly!" She jumped over to Moondancer, along with the rest of the mares.

"Huh!?" She squeaked, her face glowing.

"How was he? You were dang near skippin' this mornin'!" Apple Bloom replied.

"Well...I..." She couldn't help smiling as she glanced over at him. "H-he was really good...!"

"C'mon, don't leave us hanging Moonie!" Pinkie nudged her.

"He was a little hesitant...then again I was nervous to. Then I finally told him both reasons why I wanted him to take me..."

Spike quickly returned his attention to the train window, doing his damndest to ignore the group as she recalled the details of their...would 'love-making' be too sappy?

"So? How big we talking?"

EITHER WAY...he did his best to ignore them as she gave a...detailed recollection, apparently.

"Y-you're kidding! Whoa!"

"Oh my! *pomf!*"

"I'll second that! Hot damn!"

Would you look at that; you can see the palace in Ponyville from here.

"How are you walkin' straight after that!?"

"Actually, I'm still kinda sore, but in a really good way."

"Mmm, yes, Trixie is definitely going to enjoy her turn!"

His face heated up. Deep down, he admitted, the fact that Moondancer sounded pretty damn proud about what she was tell them, plus that he could see a couple look his way a bit hungrily was kind of awesome...and a little bit of a confidence boost.

"It was pretty yummy as well." Moondancer giggled, making an audible 'mm' sound.

But DAMN if it wasn't embarrassing too!

By the time they got back to Ponyville, Spike's face was nearly glow-in-the-dark red from the 'talk' the girls had concerning him. What surprised him is the fact that ones like Tempest and Starlight, who hadn't even appeared interested, had bit their lips a bit with pink cheeks.

Though...now that he thought about it, maybe he was just seeing things.

"Well, that was enjoyable." Rarity grinned. "However, I'm afraid I have to get home. Still have a few items to get started on myself." She glanced at Spike as she said this.

"Yeah, I need get back to Sugar Cube Corner; the cupcakes are calling! Later Spikey!" She hopped up and kissed him on the cheek before bounding off.

One by one the girls had to head home to check up on things and get back to work (Trixie stuffed a piece of paper with her current address in his waistband before leaving). And the CMC zipped off to find something he'd be good at, determined to help him get a cutie mark...even though he tried to say humans didn't have marks.

"And we have to find you a room with a bed that'll fit you." Twilight added. "While we do that, why don't you take a look around town and get a feel for the place?"

"That sounds like an idea." He replied. "Gonna need to figure where everything is if I'm gonna be living here."

"Oh, and, um, welcome to Ponyville!" Twilight smile cutely before teleporting off with Barb, Starlight, and Tempest.

"Well, guess that gives me some alone time." Spike said to himself, now that he was by himself "Where to first...?"

After a bit of just wandering around, Spike learned a few things about his new home:

1) It was gonna be damn near impossible to get lost in that town. The whole place looked to be pattered after a wheel, with the town square and what he figured was probably the town hall, and the streets spanning out to the various houses and shops.

2) The crystal palace was visible from just about every part of the town, adding to the 'not getting lost' factor.

3) With the exception of those three mares Twilight had gotten on to yesterday, most of the locals seemed pretty friendly. Thanks to one gal who'd introduced herself as the local school teacher, Cheerilee, he found that he was now the fourth male of Ponyville, along with one of the owners of Sugar Cube, Carrot Cake, Applejack's brother, Big Macintosh (who she seemed to have an on/off relationship with), and a businessman by the name of Filthy Rich.

4) He STILL had the strangest urge to try and take a bite out of Sugar Cube Corner.

"Maybe it's just my sweet tooth acting up." He mused, spying a shop not far off, the sign saying 'Sweet Drops Candies'. "Well, that's pretty good timing." He grinned as he headed over to check the place out.

A quick peek in the window was enough to send him salivating; bowls of candied citrus peel, gum drops, taffy, platters of bonbons, nougat, and a slew of other batches of candy filled the shop inside. And the sweet smell quickly led him in.

As soon as he came in, the mare at the counter looked up when the bell sounded. "Welcome to Sweet Drops Candies, where-it's you!" She started when she saw him.

He quickly recognized her. "Say, aren't you the mare who dragged that Lyra gal off on the train? Bon Bon, right?" Now he was able to get a better look at her, he noticed She also had a light apple green coat, and was now wearing a chocolate-stained apron that hugged her lithe body, showing off a hint of cleavage.

"Y-yeah." She answered. "Um, sorry about that. Lyra's been my friend since we were fillies, and she's been convinced that humans weren't just an old fairy tale for years." She chuckled a little. "She kinda has bragging rights for a while now. So, what brings you back here?"

"I live here now." He replied, telling her about Twilight messaging the princesses and their wanting to meet the 'new guy in town'.

"Oh wow. Lyra's gonna be happy when she finds out. Fair warning, though, she's gonna have a LOT of questions ready for you."

"Shouldn't be too bad. Long as she asks me stuff I know the answer to."

"Oh, that reminds me.' Bon Bon quickly turned to the back. giving him a peek at her toned rear end. "LYRA! Get out here! You owe someone an apology!"

A few seconds later, the minty mare peeked out, her expression brightening a bit when she saw. "Hi! Um..heh...sorry about pouncing you on the train. It's just...you're living proof that I was right! When I saw you, I couldn't help myself!"

"It's ok. Just caught me by surprise. First time I ever had a cute girl hop in my lap like that." He ignored the blush she got when he said 'cute'.

"So...what'll it be?" She asked, trying to fight down the blush.

"Um..." He quickly checked his wallet to see what he could afford...and realized he'd forgotten he had money from back home, which was little more than a handful of paper and metal here. "Aw crap..."

"Hm...tell you want. On the house this time." Bon Bon said. "Something to make up for my girlfriend's antics."

"And you still love me for it." Lyra grinned.

"Really?" He found himself looking around, trying to make up his mind. It took a few minutes, but he finally settled on a block of peppermint fudge.

Bon Bon quickly wrapped it up. "Don't be a stranger." Lyra winked before getting a light swat on the butt.

"I won't." His mouth was already watering at the scent and he opened it up to take a big bite when he almost collided with someone. "Whoa!

"Yeek!"

"Yikes!"

"You ok??" All three all said in unison.

Author's Note

three guesses who he runs into.

Sugar'n'Spice

"Whoa...sorry 'bout that." Spike said once he steadied himself. "Wasn't paying attention."

"Whoa...you're big."

"And I thought Apple Bloom's brother was tall."

"You know Apple Bloom?" He looked down at the two he near bowled over, and was greeted with the sight of two young mares; Earth Ponies, considering the lack of wings and horns. Both looked to be the same age as Bloom and the others, and about as tall.

One was a pale magenta with a light violet and white streaked mane. Spike couldn't help but notice she was about midway between Scootaloo and Apple Bloom in the figure department, with apple-sized breasts, flat stomach, and a slight flair in her hips. She was wearing just a pair of light pink thigh-high stockings, and her cutie mark looked like the kind of crown a high school prom queen'd get.

The other was light grey, and with a mane that was two shades of even lighter grey. She was a little shorter, but definitely closer to Sweetie in build, especially with her larger bust. This one had Thigh-highs well, though her's were black, along with a pearl choker and horn-rim glasses. Her mark was a spoon with a heart in the handle.

"Y-yeah, she's a friend of ours." The grey one spoke up, looking at him with a bit of disbelief. "Who-who are you??"

"Oh, name's Spike." He took a bite out of his fudge. "I guess you could say Fluttershy found me."

"Found you?" The other asked, looking confused.

"More or less. It's kind of a long story. Let's just say I'm from out of town."

"I'm gonna guess that's a big understatement."

Spike just laughed. "You have no idea how right you are."

"Um..what exactly...are you?" She asked. "I mean...you look male, but Daddy's told me stories about how he's met some pretty stalliony-looking mares."

"No, I'm a guy. Human male, to be exact." As soon as he said that, Spike could swear he heard a switch being flipped somewhere. The two mares' attitudes quickly, and very visibly, shifted from a mix of surprise and curiosity to the same look that Octavia mare had given him.

"Well, perhaps we should introduce ourselves." The grey one replied, taking on a more...friendly tone. "I'm Silver Spoon. And this..." She smirked and grabbed the ass of the other girl, who squeaked. " Is my girlfriend, Diamond Tiara."

"Silver..." Diamond blushed. "You know what that does to me."

"Just making Ponyville's new stallion feel welcome, DT." Silver grinned before turning her attention back to Spike. "Since you know Bloom, I'm guessing you've met Scoot and Sweetie as well."

"Yeah, their sisters as well, and their friends."

"Well, you're certainly...mmm." Diamond moaned a little as Silver kneaded her buttock. "Certainly popular."

"K-kinda." Spike kept having to tear his eyes away from how they were acting. "It's a little different from back home."

" in that case, why don't we show you around a little? Just let me get my order real quick." There was a light but audible 'smack' as Silver gave Diamond a swat on the rear before she went into the candy store.

"Yeah, we both get the urge to...suck on something every once in a while." Diamond added, biting her lip and not even trying to look innocent about what she said.

'Wow, are all mares this up front?' Spike asked himself as Silver came back out with a bag and a lollipop already in her mouth.

A couple minutes later, and the three of them were wandering around munching on candy. "So, Diamond, what should we show him first?"

The two looked at each other for a second until they both got wide grins. "Ponyville Spa!"

"There's a spa here?" 'And how can something so small be so deceptively strong!?' He asked as they dragged him off nearly effortlessly.

True enough, there was a spa in town. As soon as they pushed him inside, they were given a rather chirpy greeting by a pair of spa apron-clad, blue and pink mares, both with a lotus cutie mark. "Welcome to our...!" Though they trailed off when they saw Spike.

"This is Lotus Blossom and her sister, Aloe." Diamond said. "They own and run the place."

"Well, the place looks nice...but, shouldn't I get a shower or something first? It's been a couple of days and I doubt they wanna smell guy funk."

"You...you're male?" Lotus asked, both her and Aloe fingering the knots on their aprons.

"Uh, yeah."

"Well, we do have showers." Aloe licked her lips slightly. "And my sister and I would be more than happy to assist you with a...thorough scrubbing."

"Indeed." Lotus purred. "We pride ourselves on ensuring we don't miss a thing."

'Don't even think about it!' Spike mentally snapped at Jr. as he felt it start to stand at attention.

"Hey! C'mon you two, you're gonna overwhelm the poor guy!" Diamond chided the pair.

Hearing that, and seeing the two spa workers look a little abashed, he started to relax.

"At least wait till we've had our turn!" Silver added.

"Uh..uh, heh" Spike gulped. "I-I appreciate the gesture, ladies...but, ah, it might be best if I shower alone." He chuckled, blushing brightly. "I tend to sing a little while I shower. And I'm REALLY tone-deaf. Trust me, your ears'll thank me!"

"Aww..." The four pouted a tad.

"Wow...the female populous here is really upfront if they're interested." Spike sighed to himself while he entered the shower room. It was a fairly modest-sized, with the shower area completely lined in tiles, and a wall-mounted temperature control. "Not too shabby." He quickly undressed and got in, fiddling with the water until he liked it.

While he started scrubbing up, though, two of the smaller tiles in the back corner slowly swung inwards, each one allowing an eye to peek in.

"Why do you two even have this!?" Silver whispered, gesturing to the little hidden room the sisters had set up behind the wall. "Not that I'm complaining personally...sweet Celestia!" She ran a hand over her breast as she watched Spike's back.

"Come on, Silver. Lemme see!" Diamond scooted up to try and look in, too

"Well, sometimes Big Macintosh gets talked into visiting when he comes back from his deliveries." Lotus replied, licking her lips. "But I think it'll be getting more use now."

"Peeking on bathing stallions? That's so naughty!" Diamond bit back a giggle and forced Silver over a bit so she could see better. "Hot damn!" She grinned. "Ooh...c'mon, cutie...turn around. Mama wants to see if the front's as tasty as the back!"

"Mmmm...I'll second that." Aloe was already starting to finger herself.

Spike had just lathered up his hair when he felt it, causing him to wheel around, glancing over his shoulders almost wildly. 'It' was the odd feeling that he was being watched. 'This spa isn't haunted, is it?" He gave the area another quick look around, the feeling fading as abruptly as it came. "Huh..." He shrugged and turned back to the shower.

Back in the room, though...

"Holy shit!" Diamond panted, her face flushed. "S-Silver...you see the monster he had down there!?"

Silver just nodded, a visible line of red running from her nose. "Silver want..."

"You and me both!"

Meanwhile, Lotus was laying beside Aloe, drooling a little. "Sister...I think I'm love!"

"Hehehehe...."

"Heh, I feel a LOT better now!" Spike said, bouncing on his heels a bit as he head back to the main room.

Luckily for all four mares, they had time to get cleaned up and try to cool off a little. "I take it you enjoyed your schlo-shower! I mean shower!" Aloe asked.

"Uh, yeah. It was pretty good. Though I'm gonna have to get me a toothbrush and some other stuff once Twilight gives me a room at that palace."

"Y-you're getting a room at the Palace of Friendship??" Silver squeaked.

"Surprised me too." He replied. "But, I'm gonna be a resident here for the forseeable future, so she offered to put me up in one of the unused rooms."

"That means you're going to be living in Ponyville!?" Lotus squeaked, looking way more excited than he thought necessary.

"Yep. I guess that means we're neighbors now, more or less."

"Hehehe." She quickly cleared her throat. "Ah, yes. Um, if you'll excuse me, I....ah, I need to go take care of something real quick." The smile never left her face as she scurried off to down the hall.

"Right...anyway, we better get back to showing him around town." Diamond replied, helping Silver pull him to the door. "We'll see you later.'

"Ok, titan cock- I mean t-take care!" Aloe waved, while what sounded like a loud squee ripped through the building right as it closed.

"Wait, did she say...?" Spike started to ask...

Before Silver cut him off. "Hey! Check it out! If we hurry, we can get to the arcade in time for a couple games before it closes!"

"You guys have arcades?" That bit of info was enough to distract him. He hadn't been in an actual video game arcade since he was little!

"Yep, Joystick Alley!" Diamond grinned. "They tend to change out the games every couple of months, but there's always a few good ones."

Silver was quick to list off a few. "Like Saddle Thunder, Fury Hooves, Dungeon of the Dread Mare - a personal favorite. And a couple good prize games. They mostly give you vouchers for free soda and snacks, but it's something."

Unfortunately, the good mood was rent asunder as a loud, and unpleasantly demand-laced voice yelled out. "Diamond Tiara! Where have you been, young lady!?"

Spike cringed a little, the voice was enough to make him feel like he downed a shot of vinegar. "Who's THAT, and why do I suddenly feel like I should have a torch and pitchfork on hand?"

Diamond didn't look much better as she turned around. "That's 'cause you just heard the oh-so dulcet tones of my 'dear' mother...Spoiled Rich..."

Sour, Then Sweet.

"Your...mother?" Spike cringed a little when he saw what/who came storming up. Now, he was no medical technician, but he'd seen enough pictures to tell when features had been altered. And...hoo-boy, she looked more liposuction than lady! The way she was actually trying to look down her replacement nose at every pony within thirty feet even managed to win her a few bitch points in his book.

"Yes..." Diamond sighed. "You have no idea how many times I've been tempted to ask Twilight Sparkle for something to send me back in time so I could slap some sense into my younger self for acting like her."

"Diamond Tiara!" The older mare screeched, her tone reminding Spike of a bull moose having a hemorrhoid flareup. "Young lady, you better have a good reason for associating with the riff-raff in this town..." It was then that she saw Spike. "And what the hell is THIS!?"

"Funny, I could ask you the same thing." He replied, getting an unpleasant flashback to his own mother after he told her his chosen profession.

"Excuse me...?" She hissed, before Diamond spoke up.

"Lay off him, Mom!" She demanded, glaring at her. "He's new in town."

"'He'?" Spoiled looked at him, her expression suddenly shifting from contempt to something akin to someone looking at a cut of meat.

He suddenly felt the urge to scream 'begone, satan!'

"And need I remind you, Mother, that you're already married? To one of Ponyville's only three - now four - stallions?"

"Yeah, I'm sure you don't want ponies thinking you're some kind of 'POACHER', now, would you?" Silver said loudly, causing every mare in earshot to turn their way, and none of them with a happy look on their face.

He wasn't sure what she meant exactly, but it must not have been a pleasant thing, because Spoiled paled big time at that. She quickly schooled her looks into something more haughty and grabbed Diamond's arm. "Let's go, now!" She ordered, pulling her daughter along.

"Um, bye." Silver said, before hurrying off after them.

"Well, that was new...and a tad creepy." Spike muttered to himself, before resuming his tour of his new town. Of course, due to Silver's rather loud declaration, he now found himself overhearing a few comments from the local mares.

"There's a new stallion in town!? Why the hell didn't anypony say something!?"

"Wow, he's BIG!"

"Think he'll let us see if his height's the only big thing about him?"

"Wait, did that filly call Spoiled Rich a...a poacher?"

"You think she might be?"

"Wouldn't put it past a nag like her."

"What if she's got her eyes on him? You don't think...?"

"Riight...moving on." Spike picked up the pace a little, doing his best to ignore the newest remarks.

"Ok...being a dude in this world is a little bit more potentially hazardous than I expected." Spike sighed once he'd managed to get out of the middle of town and found the park. Luckily, there weren't that many ponies around...though 'luckily' wasn't quite a definite term, since he was being treated to the sight of a couple amorous mares liplocked and two fingers deep in each other. "Huh, they...they weren't kidding when they said taboos about sex and nudity weren't heard of here..." It took him a minute to pull his eyes away from it.

"Um, you can....you can masturbate to them if you want." Spike turned when he heard Fluttershy's voice. The demure pegasus walked over, glancing at the couple and blushing brightly.

"Do-do wha?"

"Most mares see it as a compliment when a stallion gets turned on watching them." She hid behind her hair some, looking at the growing tent in his pants. "I...uhm..." She bit her lip slightly. "....I can help if you'd like..."

"Do wha??" His face quickly rivaled hers in crimson. "That...that's ok, Fluttershy...I...uh...I'm just trying to calm down right now...had a run-in with a rather unpleasant lady her daughter said was named Spoiled Rich."

"Her!?" Fluttershy's yelp nearly made him fall off the bench. Next thing he knew she was on top of him, checking for injuries or marks. "That...that selfish excuse for a mare is one of the worst ponies you could've met!" She moved his collar and waistband to look for marks. "She didn't try anything with you, did she??"

"Wha?? N-no! Her daughter's friend, Silver spoon implied she'd be called a 'poacher' if she tried something." He was putting everything he could into willing his erection away before she saw or felt it.

"Oh, that's a relief." She calmed back down, leaning on him a bit. "Since her husband, Filthy Rich, is out often on business, Spoiled tends to act like she's entitled to a 'replacement' at times."

"A...replacement?" The word made Spike feel like he'd downed another vinegar shot for some reason.

"Since there are so few males, only a really selfish mare would try to take a second, especially since she refuses to divorce him and lose his part of the money they have." She scowled. "She's already made a pass at Mr. Cake and Big Macintosh a couple of times. Mrs. Cake and Granny Smith both kicked her flanks for it."

He snorted. "Bet that was fun to watch."

"Well, I didn't see it, but they...told us..." Her cheeks went pink again when she saw the posistion she was in; straddling Spike's waist and almost laying on him, her breasts pressing against his chest some. "Oh, um...I..." She squeaked when she felt something against her rear. "S-Spike...is that your...?"

'Oh...oh schisser...' He gulped slightly, realizing the situation now. "S-sorry, Fluttershy. Uh, I didn't really..." He blinked when, instead of jumping away like she seemed ready to, she slowly moved in closer. "Uh, I didn't really expect to have that happen. Was trying to...hmm!?" Whatever he meant to say afterwards was lost as her lips found his, hungrily at that. Any attempt to get his thoughts back on that failed when she squished her breasts against him.

"Feffa...suba...Shuffertly...?" He babbled incoherently once the kiss ended, a still slightly coherent part of his mind wondering why she tasted like banana-flavored candy.

"I...I'm sorry, Spike..." She said softly, "...but I couldn't help myself. I have a confession to make." She leaned in and nuzzled him a little. "I...I want to be one of your mares."

"Y-you do?" He asked, understandably surprised. Night Light had told him they'd probably be interested, but he figured it'd be a while, and they'd probably ask for a date or similar. Apparently Moondancer wasn't the exception.

She nodded. "It...it kind of started when I carried you back home from your fall." She giggled a little. "You're a lot heavier than you look. That, and, um...I had a really hard time resisting the urge to feel up those muscles you have." Her hand gently ran over his chest and abs through his shirt. "Especially while I was bandaging you." The blush she had grew.

Spike had to suppress a shiver when one of her fingers found its way between the buttons of his shirt.

"That and, well, it's not common, but I've heard of a few times where stallions would try to pressure a mare into sleeping with them, like the one Moondancer told us about. But, you never did when you woke up. You even tried to keep from looking past my neck; wasn't hard to see where your eyes were focused."

"W-why would I?" He asked. "Back home, that's a pretty asshole thing to do." He reminded himself that this 'Chaser' prick still needed a good fist in the face.

"And...to be honest, I feel safe around you." She tucked her head up under his chin.

"Safe?"

"Like when I was cuddled up with you in bed." Another giggle. "It was kind funny when you kept trying to keep your hand off my butt. Tickled too. That, and Moondancer told us how you reacted when she told you about that stallion in Canterlot. Like Rainbow would probably say, that sealed the deal for me." She took a deep breath.

"Man...this is a lot to take in, honestly." He replied. "I mean, I barely know anything about this place, much less the customs."

"Oh, in that case, me and the others can teach you. Lesson one: when a mare finds a stallion she's interested in, it's considered a courtesy to offer herself." She slid down his body until she was sitting right on top of his bulge. "C-Celestia! She wasn't kidding about the size of this thing!" She squeaked.

Spike's face went redder when he felt her already wet mound pressing against him. "Flutter..."

"Ooh! I KNEW I felt something!" A gleeful voice squealed, less than three feet from them. Both Spike and Fluttershy nearly cricked their necks facing a pink alicorn, wearing nothing but white lace thigh-highs, bridal gauntlets, and a grey wool scarf. She was also looking at them both with a wide grin.

"Dafuq!?" Spike yelped.

Fluttershy was a bit more composed. "Princess Cadance!? W-what are you doing here?"

Princess Perv...er,Lovebutt.

"'Princess' Cadance?" Spike blinked. "You guys have four?"

"Yep! Mi Amore Cadenza, but everypony calls me Cadance." The pink mare smirked as she crouched down by them, giving them both a view of her sex.

Spike stared. "Is...is that a piercing...??" He asked, his eyes focused on the ring of blue and green gems around her clit.

"Clip-on actually." Cadance replied, running a finger over the ring. "I'm scared to death of getting anything pointy near my lil kitty. Besides, clips are easier to swap out." She eyed Spike intently. "So, you're the reason for all the lust and desire I've been feeling since I got here." Spike turned a little red when she licked her lips. "Hm, you're definitely not a pony, but...Dancy liiike. Flutters, think I could have a taste when your done? I'll invite Gleamy if it helps."

"Wait...lust...what are you talking about?"

"Oh, heh sorry. I get kinda forward when I'm like this. My full title is 'Princess of Love, Lust, and Desire'. You've probably already met my aunt, Princess Celestia."

"Yeah, her and Luna." He frowned in contemplation. "Um, that brings up something I've been wondering since we left Canterlot. They've been rulers for a thousand years, right?"

"Basically." She replied. "Though they had a bit of falling out over something, and Luna was banished for a while. But they finally buried the hatchet a few years back."

"Right...um, if that's the case, then why aren't they still quadruped?"

"Oh, due to the circumstances of how they became Alicorns, they undergo a state of regeneration every decade or so. When that happened, whatever started causing other ponies to change affected them too."

"Ok...I guess that makes sense. Now, back to what you were saying, about lust?"

"Well, like I said in my full title; my forte is love, be it simple affection, erotic desire, primal lust, or passionate arousal. Kinda like how Aunt Celestia handles Light, The Day and The Sun. And Aunt Luna takes care of The Night, The Moon, and Dreams. Anyway, thanks to that, I can sense all that in a certain distance. When me and Gleaming dropped in this morning to spend the day with Twilight and the others, that put me close enough to sense the combined lust and desire from nearly fourteen mares."

"Oh, heh..." Fluttershy blushed.

"That much actually kinda tingles. I like it!" Cadance purred. "Also, if its strong enough, I can get a feel for just who its all directed to as well. And let me tell you; you, Mister...." She lightly tapped him on the nose. "Lit up like a store sign."

"Is...is that...good?"

"Believe me when I say if that many mares want you, the odds of you getting poached are very unlikely. So, where's a stallion like you from, anyway?"

Cadance whistled after he and Fluttershy explained things. "Wow, that's a first for me. So, you aren't sure how you got here or how to get back?"

"Nope." Spike replied, gently rubbing Fluttershy's backside once she'd finally gotten him to touch her. "I'll be an occupant of Equestria for the forseeable future."

"Twilight's letting him have one of the rooms at the palace." Fluttershy joined in, cooing softly at his touch.

"Ah, well, I'm sure you're love it here. And Ponyville finally gets a new stallion." She inhaled deeply. "Especially one that smells this nice."

"Smell...but I had a shower just a little while ago."

Cadance chuckled. "Actually, I'm talking about the ones that linger even after a bath, though washing does let your natural small come out big time. Granted some mares don't really care either way, but personally, Gleaming and I love the smell of a stallion who's gotten some recently." She took another whiff and shivered. "That one can last for days even with a bath."

"I like your scent too, Spike." Fluttershy nuzzled him, grinding against his crotch a little in the process.

"So, you planning to get big-boy here to claim you as one of his mare, Flutters?"

"I...I hope he will..."

"Can I watch?"

Spike instantly turned beet red. "W-watch??"

"Why not?"

"Uh, Fluttershy, Is...is that really common??"

"Oh yes." Fluttershy replied. "Some mares take it as not being considered attractive if you don't."

"Oh...uh, but what about you? Would you be ok...? Given that you seem, well, like the shy one of the group."

"I'm fine with it if you are." She blushed brightly, and he could feel her arousal soaking into his pants

"Let me guess, your home has rules on nudity and such, right? So it's still the adjustment stage." Cadance asked, getting a nod in return. "Well, you were digging those two mares going at it, weren't you?" She grinned when his redness deepened. "It's pretty much the same, just you're the watch-ee."

Spike gulped. They'd picked apart nearly all the doubts he could think of. "But...but what about performance anxiety? I have no idea how well I could act while being watched. That could turn me into a ball of nerves."

"Oh that's easy!" Cadence smiled. "I can get Gleaming and we'd be happy to put on a show for you to help rev things back up if you start having trouble."

This made a part of his brain shut down. If this Gleaming was anything like her...

It was then that he blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "Well, I-i wouldn't wanna intrude..."

'Ah, it's no biggie!" Cadance chirped. "Gleaming loves to have an audience too." She winked before teleporting away.

As he stared at the spot she'd been, Spike mentally asked himself, 'What have you gotten yourself into?'

"Oh my...! It's bigger than I thought!"

However, when he felt the sudden draft downstairs, along with Fluttershy squeaking in delight, his attention was shifted to the now flushed pegasus mare, looking happily at his now unzipped pants, and exposed erection.

"F-Fluttershy...?" 'How the hell did she do that without me noticcc-' His mind snagged on itself when she started to lightly stroke his shaft.

"So this is what a stallion penis feels like?" She asked, looking at him intently. "It's really stiff...and veiny." She giggled. "It's kinda cute in a way." He tensed up a little when she gave it an experimental sniff. "Smells nice too."

"Um...th-thaaaanks" He groaned when she gave the tip an experimental lick.

"Oh, Moondancer was right!" She giggled, giving his shaft a longer lick. "*lick* You are *lick* yummy!*lick*"

"Sweet beer-battered Buddha!" He moaned, his eyes rolling back a little as her licking slowly turned to sucking as she wrapped her lips around the head.

"Oh, you...you can lick me, too, if you want." She pulled up for a moment. Spike could only watch as she repositioned herself, laying down on him to give a view of her sex, inches from his face.

Spike had seen pictures of cunnilingus, but he'd always heard from people like his father, and a couple of cousins, that doing it once was enough for them. Then again, they'd told stories about meeting up with hookers, so he doubted the validity. Besides, the mound being offered to him was, in all honesty, pretty damn cute. The line of soft pink flesh in the middle of her lips glistened with her honey and looked inviting.

"If it..if it helps, Barb says I taste like banana breaah!" She cried out when she felt his tongue slide along her pussy. "Ohh...sweet C-Celestia! Spike, your tongooohhh...!"

"Hm...I'd say more like a banana split." She squealed when his tongue probed her entrance. "And I happen to enjoy banana splits." He wasn't sure how or why, but the noises she let out as he continued his attention made him feel a little bolder. With that, he did something that even surprised him.

Sitting up, which brought her lower body with him, he wrapped one arm around her waist, taking a firm hold on her rear while gently grabbing one of her breasts with the other. Taking her moans to mean he had a good hold on her, he wrapped his mouth around her mound, firmly plunging his tongue into her.

"Oh yeah...take your little mare!" She squealed, returning to her own sucking with a relish.

'Yeah, my dad and the others were full of it.' He thought, lapping away at her inner walls as she descended on him. 'She's delicious!'

Meanwhile, Fluttershy was thinking the same thing while her head bobbed up and down on her new stallion's cock, her purrs mixed with squeals and muffled moans. 'Oh Celestia...I can't believe it, I have a stallion! And his tongue is...'

"Wow! How much did we miss?" Cadance's voice returned, causing them to stop and glance her way. However, it was who she was with that had their attention. Beside her was a voluptuous, light grey unicorn mare with a light, mid, and dark blue streaked mane, wearing thigh-highs and bridal gauntlets like Cadance. Hers were black, though, and she had on a garterbelt instead of a scarf. She also had on a pair of nipple clip-ons with dangling rubies.

"Damn, babe. You weren't kidding when you said he looked tasty!" She licked her lips at the shaft halfway in Fluttershy's mouth. "Looks like Fluttershy can confirm it."

"Spike, say hello to my wife; Twilight's older sister, Gleaming Shield, Princess-Consort, former Captain of the Canterlot guard, and all-around magnificent piece of ass!"

Author's Note

So, who you wanna see go after Spike when he and Fluttershy are done?

1) Cadance
2) Gleaming Shield
3) They double-team him.

Park Playtime

"Um, hi?" Spike managed to get out, after watching Cadance shamelessly grope the new mare, after a few squeezes and squeals, he recalled being told about Twilight's sister marrying. "Oh yeah, Twilight mentioned her sister marrying a Cadance."

"That's me!" Gleaming winked. "And you're the hot lil stud that's got Twily and her pals worked up."

"Heh, um, I probably wouldn't go that-hff!" He eeped when Fluttershy tried to deepthroat him.

Gleaming smirked. "She seems to disagree. Trust me, when Cadance here gets that shiver, someone's got some attention." She chuckled a little. "And judging from the scent, she's not the first."

"Moondanshah." Fluttershy said around him.

"F-Fluttershy.." Spike shivered, "Please don't talk with your mouth full."

"Ooh, good on her. Now..." Gleaming's smile turned a bit more lascivious, "I believe you two were, heh...busy with something?"

"Oh, uh...y-yeah." He swallowed the lump in his throat and turned back to the yellow mare's mound in front of him. A small whine from Fluttershy told him she was waiting. He wanted to get back to eating her out, he really did. But...

"Wow, you really aren't used to an audience, are you?" Cadance asked, seeing his hesitation.

"Well, Moondancer was the first girl I've ever been with, and everyone else in the room was asleep."

"Interesting." Gleaming leaned in. "I take it they were heavy sleepers."

"I...I dunno, we did our best to be quiet about eeeet!" He yelped when Fluttershy started nibbling on his shaft, wiggling her rear at him as she did so.

"Methinks someone's getting impatient." Cadance giggled. "Babe, what do you think about helping Ponyville's new stallion with his..." She slipped a hand between Gleaming's thighs and started fingering her, "...performance anxiety?"

Gleaming moaned softly, spreading her legs apart, which gave Spike the perfect view of Cadence's fingers plunging slowly into her wife's pussy. "Mm, by ahhll means...oh yeah, show mama what those fingers can dooo!" Gleaming arched her back as Cadance sped up, giving him a wink as she did so.

Spike's gaze slowly drifted down to the fingers, with Gleaming lifting her hips slightly for better access, to the two mares nearby, one of whom was eating the other out. Eagerly, if the moans were any indicator. Then he turned back to Fluttershy, who was looking back at him anxiously...

"Fuck it!" He said. "When in Rome!" With that, he clamped his mouth over the mare's crotch and plunged his tongue into her folds with a vengeance.

"Wow...didn't know she could scream that loud." Cadance said when Fluttershy let rip with a scream of delight that had every mare in earshot look their way. "I'm impressed!" She let a chuckle out when it faded to shrieks and moans as she could just make out Spike's hungry licks and slurps while he devoured the little pegasus.

"Oh, Celestia!" Fluttershy cried out, having forgotten somewhat about sucking him off. "Your tongue...I-" She cut herself with another scream when he found a sensitive spot, and his lip rubbed over her clit.

Fluttershy, while she'd had her share of somewhat intimate moments with her friends, like Rainbow Dash and Pinkie, had never been with a male before. So the new sensations were getting the best of her in was she'd only dreamed of. When she felt his canines lightly scrape over her flesh, she realized she was in the clutches of a predator, and she was loving every moment of it! And she wanted more...no, him, her stallion.

Spike wasn't too sure exactly what happened, one second he was eating Fluttershy out, the next, she'd somehow slipped out of his grip and was face-to-face with him...with a look that could only be described 'horny as all hell' Another second found him on his back, Fluttershy on top of him, and his clothes tossed aside.

"You are going to claim me!" She growled, panting hard.

'Again, how do they manage to be this strong!?' He thought, though what came out was "P-pardon?"

"You're making me your second mare!" She growled, gripping him as she positioned herself. "I want you to SKEWER me with this glorious cock and stake your claim!"

"They weren't kidding when they say it's the quiet ones...!" He responded over her squeal as she impaled herself on him. "But I'm not complaining!"

Gleaming gave him a thumbs up. "My words exact-SWEET BUTTERY FAUST!" She shrieked when Cadance swapped out fingers for her tongue. "Damn, you got her on a roll now!"

He wasn't sure what that meant, exactly, but that thought was temporarily tossed out the window when Fluttershy, once she'd gotten over the surge of being stretched out, started eagerly bouncing on him. "Oh, sweet...now I-haa! Now I know what had Moondancer smiling all morning!" She moaned, leaning back slightly.

'And now I know why Kirk was such a manho!' Spike thought, gripping her hips. ''Go where no man has gone before' indeed!'

"Ahh...oh yes..." Fluttershy purred, grinding on him with each bounce, her moans mixing in with Gleaming's squeals and Cadance's audible slurping. Along with the cacophany of pleasured mares, Spike could pick up bits from the others in earshot.

"Hey, Tavi, check it! Your hunk's here...damn..."

"He is not, Vinyl! ...and quit drooling!"

"When the hell did we get a new stallion?? And how the HELL did Fluttershy get him first!?"

"Who cares? Think she'll share?"

"Fluttershy??" A mare with a really light blue-green coat, and wearing just a gauzy skirt, stared at them, blushing brightly. "I...I..." She squeaked and clamped her thighs together.

"Huh didn't know Coloratura was hereeeahh!" Gleaming let out a shuddering squeal and grabbed a handful of Cadance's mane as her climax hit.

"Hello, Fluttershy." Another voice spike up, this one a little of the monotone side. And belonging to a grey, and VERY well built mare with a blue-grey mane, wearing just boots and a belt.

"H-Hi, Maud. S-Spike this is...h-harder! Maud, P-Pinkies older sister...Maud...this is Spike... Yesss!, rut your new mare silly!"

"I wondered what the screams were about." Despite the mildly disinterested look she had, what she said was a different matter. "He must have a very large penis to make you scream that loudly."

"He does! Oh, Faust, does he!" Fluttershy whined happily.

Spike turned red. "Heh, well..." He paused when Maud ran her fingers over his chest.

"Is there a chance you and his other mare would be willing to share? I've been quite horny lately, and my fingers are insufficient."

"Hey, wait your turn!" Cadance responded, licking her wife's juices off her lips.

'Spike, you have done something either very right or very, VERY wrong in a previous life.' He thought.

Princesses, I Presume?

It took a few minutes for the group to get on board, mostly due to more than a few other ponies staring at Spike in surprise and holding up the ticket line. A couple were pretty quick to ask the others what he was.

And judging from the slightly exasperated look on Twilight's face, she'd experienced moments like this more then she really wanted to. "He is a human. No, we don't know how he got here, and neither does he. We're simply escorting to Canterlot because I informed Princess Celestia and Luna about him and they are curious as well."

Thankfully, that was the worst they dealt with, and soon they were all seated and the conductor gave the all clear.

"So, anything about Canterlot I should know?" Spike as asked they left Ponyville behind.

"Well, Moondancer already told you that's where she lives." Startlight answered. "And Twilight and Barb are from there too."

"Donut Joe's is there too. I used to go there a lot when me and Twilight were little." Barb added.

"Unfortunately, it's also got a lot of snooty, high-falootin', so-called 'nobles' that live there too." Applejack muttered.

Rarity sighed. "Come now, AJ. I will admit certain ones like Jet Set and Upper Crust..." She ignored the derisive snorts from Applejack, Rainbow, and even Twilight. "But there are a few good ones. Remember how Fancy Pants literally begged for the recipe for your cider?"

"Ok, Ah'll gave you that one, Rares." The farmgirl admitted. "But there's still a lot of polecats there. Princess Bluebelle ring a bell?"

"Oh..." Rarity grimaced.

"Do...do I wanna know?"

"Princess Bluebelle is Celestia and Luna's niece." Twilight said. "She's also one of the most spoiled ponies around. Rarity learned the hard way when she tried making friends at the Grand Galloping Gala. It's an annual royal ball to celebrate Canterlot's completion."

"Ah." He started to wonder just what he was getting into.

"YOU'RE REAL!"

Unfortunately...or luckily, depending on who was asked, he was quickly broken from his thoughts by an excited squeal, followed by a mint green unicorn mare jumping into his lap.

"You're real! You're really real!" She cried out, bouncing in his lap, much to his embarrassment, and the girls' annoyance.

"Um...Hi?" He said, trying not to react to just what her bare backside was bouncing on.

"Hi, I'm Lyra Heartstrings! You're a human, right!?" She chirped. "I KNEW you guys existed! I told you, Bon Bon, ha!"

Spike, later on, would ask himself more than once why he did it. But, for some inexplicable reason, he couldn't stop himself; "So, do you taste as minty as you look?"

Lyra looked at him in surprise for a second before giving a coy look. "Why not have a taste and find OW!" She yelped when another mare got hold of her ear, pulling her off him. Spike noted this one was beige with a cobalt blue, pink streaked mane a tat-cutie marks that looked like candy.

"Uh...Bon Bon, I presume?"

"Sorry about that." She blushed, pulling on Lyra's ear. "She's always been hoping your kind were real. And when she saw you..." The blush brightened and she dragged the unicorn off. "I can't believe you!" He heard her chastise Lyra a little ways off. "We agreed to share....!"

"Heh, sorry about that." He said, looking back at the others. "Not real sure what possessed me to say...that..." Instead of the somewhat offended/shocked looks he though he was going to see, instead nearly all of them were blushing. Ones like Scootaloo and Moondancer were biting their lips.

"Ooh, wanna see if I taste like cotton candy?" Pinkie spoke up, shaking her breasts before Applejack shoved her into the seat.

"Um..." Spike remained silent, not real sure how to react to Pinkie aside from the growing blush.

The next half hour was more or less in silence on his part, half-listening to the brief pieces of conversation he managed to catch from the girls. Mentally, though, he was wondering how the other two princesses would react when they saw him; given how the letter was worded, she seemed genuinely curious, but when he got there could be a whole other story.

"Talk to him, Tavi. That is a 'he', right?" A voice from the opposite seat roused him from his mental rambling. He looked over to see two new mares setting there, one was a lithe-looking while unicorn with a shaggy blue mane and dark sunglasses, wearing sneakers, fishnet leggings, gloves, and a studded collar with a reversed eighth note cutie mark.

Beside her was a more buxom, light grey earth pony with black hair down to her waist, wearing heels, thigh-high stockings that showed off her violet treble clef cutie mark, and a bow tie.

He couldn't help but grin a little; she really was rather pretty. Apparently she might've been thinking similar, because she was glancing his way with a smile and blush of her own. Every so often, her friend seemed to nudge her and gesture towards him.

Another glance his way caused her blush deeper and look away. The unicorn snorted, and from the angle he was at, seemed to roll her eyes behind her glasses before getting up...

And heading straight towards him, ignoring the other's protesting motions. "Hey there, big guy." She said, lifting her shades to look at him, a pair of cerise eyes glittered in amusement when he tried not to glance past her neck. "I'm just gonna pull a captain obvious and say you definitely aren't a local boy."

"That's putting it really mildly." He replied. "One minute I'm at a practice dig for my archaeology class, the next I'm bouncing down a hillside." He open his shirt to show the bandages. "Think I smacked most of the rocks on the way down."

"Ouch." She winced. "Um, anyway, name's Vinyl Scratch, AKA DJ Pone3, Ponyville's premiere DJ." She motioned to the other. "And is my bud, Octavia Melody."

"H-hello." She said softly, a noticeable British accent in her voice.

"Spike. Spike Draksen, I guess the only thing I am at the moment is the extraterrestrial."

"An alien? That's...actually kinda cool. Hey, listen, let us know next time you're in Ponyvill and the two of us'll look you up...and down." She winked before heading back to her seat, where the two engaged in a quiet, but frantic, conversation.

"Uh, s-sure." He mumbled. 'Did...did she just come on to me?'.

"You guys weren't kidding when you said it was a trip!" Spike looked out from the Canterlot train station. The sun was already starting to set by the time they arrive. "Hey, I can see your town from here!" He though he could almost see the little dot that was Fluttershy's place, and what they called the Everfree just past it.

"Yeah, it's a heck of a view." Barb said, looking out with him. "If you squint right in the morning you can spot Appleloosa."

"Come on Barb, we can all show him around after we introduce him to the princesses." Twilight called out.

As they made their way through town, he noticed the ponies here dressed almost the same as in Ponyville; naked excepr for an accessory like scarves, shawls, belts, ect..though a few went a bit more daring with garter belts or body harnesses made of gold chain. However, he noticed something odd.

Out of all the ponies there, he'd seen only one male; the stallion they'd introduced as Donut Joe. And for some reason, he seemed intent on wearing something akin to a kilt. Given that no one commented, he took it as normal. Though, he did find the look of sympathetic pity Joe gave him as they left a little disconcerting. 'Now that I think about it, I didn't see any guys while pinkie was dragging me to the station...' He quietly made a point to ask the Princesses about this.

A few minutes later they were entering the front gate on the palace. Impressive gardens flanked either side of them with a large set of steps leading to the entranced. If he was honest with himself, Spike felt a little intimidated.

"Something wrong, Stud?" Trixie asked, sidling up beside him and setting a hand on his thigh.

"Never been this close to an actual palace before...especially one with a country's rulers living in it. I'm feeling just a little bit nervous.

"Ah, nothing to worry about, Stretch!" Rainbow hovered up in front of him, swatting Trixie's hand off him with her tail. "Celestia and Luna are fine. As long as you don't attack him or other ponies...or try and steal their favorite desserts, they're harmless."

"Their desserts?" He couldn't help but laugh a little at how random that sounded.

"Trust me, you're safer not knowing." She shivered. "It's not pretty...that poor griffon."

Spike started to say something, stopped, tried again, faltered, tried one more time, then gave up, realizing nothing he could say would make any more sense out of it. "Okay...I...I guess we better go in." He followed them inside.

Oddly enough, the interior felt...well, welcoming. It was bright, airy, and decorated with a sense of comfort in mind. It was also where he made another discovery: as they passed guards - who either saluted the girls and/or gave him oddly appraising looks (he could've sworn a couple licked their lips) - they were all female again. Unicorns, pegasi, earth ponies, but every one of them, save for a stallion stationed in a guard alcove, it was a completely female regiment.

And to add another odd aspect, their uniforms. Granted it had the standard; sabatons, greaves, gauntlets, pauldrons, helms...the rest was little more than a metal bikini...or speedo in the stallion's case. He really, reeeealy wanted to just ask 'why'. but decided against it. It was probably another cultural aspect, and not really his place to critique, especially since he wasn't an armorer.

"We're here." Twilight said, as the group entered a large chamber. Elaborate stained glass windows and banners decorated the walls and the two large pillars supporting the ceiling. "The throne room and audience chamber."

He let out a low whistle at the sight. "Well, I'm impressed."

"I believe we can take that as a compliment, huh, Sister?" A melodic voice from nearby caused him to whirl around for the source. His jaw dropped when he saw them. Two more alicorns, the other navy blue. The white one stood as tall as him, her horn adding an extra foot of height. Her mane was almost a cloak of pink, blight blue and green that nearly touched the floor and seemed to constantly be moving.

"I 'm a little surprised all of you came along, to be honest." She was wearing a gold crown and shimmering full-length silver-colored dress that hugged her hourglass figure with two holes in the sides to let her cutie marks, a golden sun, be visible. The plunging neckline offering a substantial peek at her E-cup breasts.

"Indeed." The navy blue one took over. While she was noticeably shorter, possibly only reaching his shoulder, she was no less jaw-dropping. Her mane was floor-length and always moving as well, but her's was dark blue, and decorated with countless glittering dots that made it almost twinkle. She wore a crown that looked like it was made of onyx, and a dark blue, almost black, strapless and backless dress, descending down to almost the curve of her pert-looking backside. The front, while not as deep as the taller alicorn, had no less an easy task showing off her own DD-cup chest. Her's also had holes to show off her cutie mark: a crescent moon on a black background. "We had expected just Twilight and Barb to volunteer to escort our new visitor here. It's not unwelcome, just unexpected."

Spike gulped, praying he wasn't about to pop a boner in the presence of these two as they both focused their gaze on him.

"So, you're our new guest." The white alicorn nodded slightly. "I'm Princess Celestia."

"I am Princess Luna." The blue one added, offering a small smile.

"Welcome to Equestria." They said in unison.