I Am About To Drink With...
Another day, another bit. Or so the saying goes in your residence in Equestria.
Working at the job that you so happen to be in was always tedious, meticulous and stressing enough for you to have a drink in your favorite watering hole. After opening the door to your bar, you place your jacket on the hook near the door with a relieved sigh. Within a moment, the patrons, who so happen to be anthro ponies, all take a moment to look at you.
Naturally, your response is to say, "Hey, everypony."
All of the patrons say your name as loudly as possible without shaking the place too much.
"So what's going on, eh?" the bartender asks you while cleaning a rocks glass as they wait for you to take your stool.
"If it's a dog eat dog world out there, then I'm wearing both a Milk-Bone thong and a Purina bra," you reply to the bartender, earning a big laugh from your fellow patrons. The last reply that you said to your favorite pony was something about something or other. Oh, wait! Now you remembered! You walk in to a bar to get a drink.... the bartender finishes it.
"So what's bothering you, huh?" your favorite pony asks after serving you a big pint.
Upon looking at it, you remembered that the 32 fl. oz. pint is exactly what you requested if you said something that made the ponies laugh, including your server. And it so happens to have the color and alcohol content that you so desired.
Before you even allowed yourself to reply to your favorite pony, you take a hard swig at your beer and gulp it down, satisfied with the soothing effect that it had on your entire person. After a year of being with your significant pony, while also establishing your citizenship in this really amazing country, you remember why it was that no other pony (other than the server in front of you) could ever figure you out until you were comfortable enough to say your piece. And after a few gulps of your beer, you look up to your (somewhat) favorite pony and look him in the eye.
"My significant, or uh..." you trail off to find the better words to say, "special somepony is coming in, so I want to give them a really great time in this place. Plus, if I can get them to promote this place for all of Equestria, with myself and everypony here, then we will all be golden," you finish.
"Sorry, what?" the bartending pony raises their brow at your comment.
"What I am saying is that some kind of promotion here will get you more customers," you begin to say. "And with you and my special somepony here, this place will have a great standing.... and maybe if we get some awesome reviews in the papers, we just might be able to make this a place where...."
You stop yourself to take a moment to take a breath in and out of your mouth before...
"Makin' your way in the world today takes everything you got," you begin to sing, seeing the other ponies going along with what you were serenading your bar with.
"Takin' a break from all your worries sure would help a lot," a random stallion sings with you in perfect harmony, despite his somewhat slurred timing.
"Wouldn't you like to get away?" a mare jumps in.
As soon as you all hear a cymbal snare, you all start to sing....
"Sometimes you wanna go, where everypony knows your name.
And they're always glad you came! You wanna be where you can see, Our troubles are all the same! You wanna be where everypony knows your name!
You wanna go where ponies know, our troubles are all the same! You wanna be where everybody knows your name!"
Somepony was already playing the piano while you sang that tune for everypony. And everypony was cheering after that song was sung.
"Hey! Now I remember! How about another drink?" the bartender, named Bronze Tap, said to you.
"Not until I can-" you stop yourself, seeing only a few fluid ounces drunk from your glass before you say, "- I can see my date in this bar. I specifically requested my special somepony to be here. I can't remember what for or why, but-" you trail off again, given that you so happen to only get this drunk when your special somepony either gets here or if it was your birthday. "I'm hoping that I can be a lot better than I was with my drinking here, both with you and with my love," you say while looking at your fellow bar patrons and the pony named Bronze.
"Say, I gotta tell you, I am really happy that you got together with your special somepony," Bronze says, obviously happywith the situation. "When you first came here, all of us were quite afraid of you." When that was said, you turn your head to your fellow patrons to see if you had any shared disagreements. They were nodding their heads to the bartender pony, annoying you a bit.
"Well thank you for that vote of confidence, everypony," you dryly chuckle. "See if I spend one hundred bits on you."
After everypony in your bar hears you say 'bits', they all go up to the bar from their tables, way too oblivious to what you were actually saying. They were way too drunk to even say to their meme makers that they would drunk to swear that they are not Celestia. Somepony said 'Or Luna!' adding on to the comedic effect. And that earned a lot of laughs.
"Moving on!" you shout as you look at your glass. After a moment needed for hesitation, you chug your glass until you see yourself at just a guly.
"Hello there, my love!" a voice speaks to you. "Let's take our order."
From there, the whole date starts up.
Author's Note
Hello to you, my fellow bronies and pegasisters! This is a self-insert story where you, my writing friends, write a chapter with yourselves, the tagged characters... and more. Please PM me if you happen to have a hilarious chapter to write with the main characters so that I can publish it into a new chapter. This intro was made by myself, but the chapters are to be made by you and you alone for this collection.
Love y'all!! 
