Party of three

by Autin Brony

Rating: teen
Tags: Romance, Original Character, Mystery, Octavia, Bon-Bon, DJ P0N-3, Lyra, Drama, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 8468

Vinyl and Octavia go on a date with a police officer.

It's been a few months sense the wedding of Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia Melody. And things have been going great. That is, until things take a turn for the awkward when an acquaintance of Vinyl's pulls a few strings to score a date with the lovely couple.
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Well i finally did it. In honor, of the soon to be, season eight. As well as me having some serous dental work done tomorrow, I finally felt brave enough to release this project that Ive been working on for months. That being said I'm more than aware it has some serous grammar problems. the reason being, that around a year ago i was almost illiterate. However Ive been improving myself and i feel this is the most grammatically correct, story Ive ever made.
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also i would like to credit Awkward Marina, for creating the song lyra anthropology which i use as a minor plot element. additionally i would like to thank Dlazerous for. And Tootsie Flute Makes Three. Which i reference and am partly inspired by.

Published 2017-12-17 23:50:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-12-17 23:50:06 UTC

Chapter one, the home

Author's Note

Thank you for reading my story. I certainly hope its worth your time. also please know, I'm aware the grammars awful. I'm working on that. if you do have criticism let it be for the story, I would be happy to hear input for the sequel.

Chapter one, the home

Clack clack clack went the hoof of Vinyl as she stood at the door watching the clock. "Tavy, come on Where is he? I wanna get this over with."

Across the room on the couch, Octavia was lying down flipping through a special edition of musicians weekly. The cover of which featured a rather nice photo of the two in a loving embrace.

"Vinyl dear," Octavia called out. "I haven't the foggiest why you're going along with this. Or, Why you insist to drag me into it for that matter. But I swear. If this is another one of your, 'Bedroom Experiments.' The bedroom is the last place you're seeing for a month."

"Tavvvy, come on. You know it isn't like that."

I certainly hope not." Octavia said flipping to another page of the magazine. "Whatever the case, don't you feel you could be using this proverbial calm before the storm productively, rather than simply waiting at the door."

Vinyl facehoofed. "Darn it your right. I still need to fix my mane and get my dress on." She then gallops over to the hall closet. "So which do you think looks better. This frilly blue one, Or that sparkly silver one I wear to raves?"

Coincidentally, Octavia had just flipped to a page featuring a large photo of the DJ wearing the aforementioned visually hazardous rave wear. the sight of which made her cringe. Casually clearing her throat she responds. "Well, given the nature of this engagement. I do believe the blue one might be more suitable."

"Yeah, I guess your right. besides, if I wore the silver id be too busy knocking Ponys away to hold up any decent dinner conversation." Vinyl says flashing a puckish smile.

Octavia rolls her eyes unamusedly and returns her attention to her magazine. "Whatever you say love. Now could you please explain why I have to go with you. Don't you feel my presence might make the situation a tad awkward?"

The DJ cringes then turns back around. "You got it all backwards Tavy. I need you to go so it's less awkward."

"And how do you figure that?" She asks without looking up.

"B...e..c.ause,..... if you weren't there, I would spend the whole afternoon thinking I was cheating on you." Vinyl's head Suddenly twitches as she gives a facade smile.

Octavia glances back at vinyl raising her skeptic's eyebrow.

"Fine... Its because he wanted you to tag along too."

"Uh, huh."

"Trust me Tavy, I hate this just as much as you. But I owe this guy big time, so please just go with it."

Octavia continues glancing skeptically.

"I promise things won't get weird."

Not noticing her spouse's obvious discomfort Octavia stands up and places the magazine on a shelf. "I doubt that." She states with annoyance." But very well. If it's for the sake of your honor, I shall comply. However, Love, Before you do something like this again. Please ask my opinion first...... In any case, I suppose it's time for me to get dressed as well."

Without another word, Octavia trots out.

Vinyl's head twitches again and she sighs. "If only it was that easy Tavy."

A few moments later there was a knock on the front door. "Open Up, This Is The Police." A voice from behind the door the yells with unusual zeal.

The Dj rolls her eyes and yells, "HOLD ON A MINUTE WILL YA." She then proceeds throws on the rest of her dress. Once that was out of the way, she magicked open the door as she headed for the couch.

Immediately, a short fat stallion with a creamy brown coat and silver mane walks in. "Hey hey hey, theirs my favorite troublemaker. haven't seen you In a while filly how have you been?"

"Oh, hello officer, YO NUTS!" Her head twitches again. "Thanks for asking. I was doing great. That is till I got your call last week!"

The cop rubbed his head in confusion, "What did you,..... Oh, um, I mean, Vinyl I told you never to call me that,”

"And I told you to stop flirting with me." She cracks. "Now look where we are. You're practically forcing me and my wife out on a date with you. So Exxccuuuuse me, if I think you've earned a few jabs."

"More than a few if you ask me," Octavia added as she trotted into the room wearing a beautiful silken black dress with pink accents. "But where are my manners, my name is Octavia Melody. I presume you to be our gentlecolt caller for the evening."

"Why yes, my name is Donut, But everypony calls me Officer Donut. wow, I have to say, you are gorgeous. I always thought Vinyl would have good taste in mares.

Octavia blinked. "Thank you... I suppose.. now may I." Suddenly a loud whistling rang out from the kitchen, "Oh my, sounds like the Earl grey is done. Either of you care for a spot before we head out?"

Donut reply's with a hearty, "None for me thanks. No sense in filling up on free stuff when you're about to drop a whole bag on a date."

"I'll take some if we still have that cherry vodka to mix in.

Octavia sighs, "I'll go see what we have. In the meantime, you two can catch up."

After a few seconds had passed. Vinyl quickly but quietly galloped over to the edge of the hallway. making certain Octavia was out of earshot. Once she was gone Vinyl announced in her angriest whisper. As her head twitched again. “Listen Yo Nuts!!! It's bad enough that I have to put up with you flirting with me each and every time I get locked up. But now you pull this shit.”

In a miserably failed attempt at sounding suave. the overweight unicorn says. “Vinyl babe, you know you don't mean that, besides."

"Just so you know," Vinyl interrupts harshly. "I'm playing it cool around Tavy, but after tonight you better lose my number or else."

"Just remember filly. We, ALL, have a good time tonight or I spill the beans on your wife's little secret. Got me?

In a flash, the whisper breaks, "WHATEVER! You, just remember the, ONLY, reason I'm doing this is to keep Octavia safe. And if you don't hold up your end of the bargain. Trust me, a sentence to Tartarus will sound better then what I'll do to you."

"What was that about Tartarus?" Asked Octavia as she walked into the living room carrying a tray with two teacups on her back. "Oh, Vinyl dear. could you please help me with this. I don't wish to get my dress dirty.

"Sure thing Tavy." Said Vinyl with yet another facade smile as she telekinetically lifted the tray over to the table. “Oh, and Tartarus right... um.........why, were we talking about Tartarus?”

"Um,........ Oh yeah, I was telling her about this one time I transferred a prisoner there. It's a pretty scary place. I can't believe Celestia keeps it running like that."

Octavia sits down next to Vinyl and grabs a cup. ”Oh yes. It is nasty business what they do there. But on the other hoof, all those S Class baddies have to go somewhere." She shrugged. "However, I find that's hardly a proper subject for polite conversation." Sip, "So, Mr. Donut, may I ask how you actually know my darling Vinyl. I get the impression you two have a history.”

He gives an uneasy smile and scratches his mane. "Well, let's just say I used to bounce at a club she worked at during college. Back then She hadn't really come out of the closet yet. so I actually thought I had a chance. Not that I'm bitter about it or anything. I mean, we never did anything, Obviously. But I do like to think we were at least friends back then."

Vinyl rolls her eyes, and crosses her forelegs with a Hmph.

"With that said. After I joined the force, I guess I just kept looking out for her. In fact, I'm actually the one who keeps her arrest and drunk tank visits off the public record. I've even paid her bail a few times.”

“It's not like I ask you to do that!!!” Vinyl snapped, as her head twitches once again.

Octavia takes another sip. "Vinyl that's Rude. But anyway, I suppose that does answer a few questions I had. However, now I think would be a good time To tell me what your true intentions for the evening might be?"

At the question Donut's eyes dart back and forth."What do you mean?" He asks with more than a little dread.

Octavia Takes an extra long sip and continues. "One does not simply, Call up, a college friend. Then proposition them and their spouse on a potentially romantic excursion out of the blue."

"Hey, listen Mrs. Melody. You don't have to worry about that. we ain't gonna be doing nothing if you don't want to. let me just make that clear. all I want is to spend some time with you and Vinyl that's all, so I figured id cash in all those favors she owed me for a big one."

Vinyl Harrumphs in frustration.

Octavia takes one last sip of her tea finishing the cup, "Well, that's all fine and good. I suppose,........ maybe, so long as it doesn't go too far. However, that doesn't really explain why you want me to come. I don't even know you."

Donut winced and began rubbing his hoof nervously, "well, um. it's, you see."

Vinyl yells, "Spit it out already Yo Nuts, "Then proceeds to drink her whole cup like a shot. "We don't have all night."

"Well yeah. This is a little embarrassing. You see I was talking to my friends the other day. And... I may have been bragging that I could have any mare I wanted. Then one thing led to another. One of them showed me a copy of musicians weekly with your wedding photo on it. And well Now we're here."

Vinyl places her cup on the tray aggressively and snarls, "So you're telling me.!! The reason for all of this!! Everything!! Is because your friends are jackasses. And you still got it in your head that you're the cock of the walk."

"Hey, I wouldn't go that far." He joked. "All I need is to be seen going out with two of the biggest names in music, That's all. Besides, I haven't seen you since before you were married. And I guess I missed seeing that pretty face of yours whenever I looked over to your cell."

Octavia chimes in with an annoyed tone, "Sorry to interrupt you giving my wife, The Look, But could you be so kind as to tell me when we will be leaving, I need to know if I should put another pot on."

Donut stammers a little, "Oh, um, sorry about that, um, Yeah, we can leave whenever."

"Very well, nows as good a time as any." She says collecting the cups and tray. "May I ask where we will be heading tonight?"

"Oh, don't worry babe, I know a great place. Ever been to Cheval Sur L'eau? I'm an elite member, so I get food half price and I even get to set up special reservations."

Octavia squints her eyes as she almost drops her tray. "Excuse me, Mr. Donut. But when you say, Cheval Sur L'eau, Do you by chance mean that really expensive place with all the marble pillars, and a floor that is essentially a giant hot tub."

"Yeah, that's the place. You go there often? Now that I think about it. I think I may have seen you there before.............. Um, are you ok? You look kinda pissed."

Summoning up all her years of etiquette training as to refrain from beating him over the head with a teacup, Octavia Politely growls. "Well, Mr. Donut. If you must Know. I did in fact used to work there as part of their in-house band. But, if you think for even a Second, I'm going to let you drag us off to that den of debauchery. You got another thing coming."

"Here tavy, let me help you with that," Vinyl says levitating the dishes away from Octavia to keep her from breaking them. "You're really pushing your luck here, Yo Nuts. Did you really think we would let you take us to that gilded whore house?"

In a jokey manner Donut replies. "Listen fillies. Its like I said. You don't have to do nothing like that if you don't want to. The Sur l'eau ain't your kinda place, No problem. I only wanted to go for the food anyway. Feel free to pick anywhere you want. I'm fine with anything,...........ex.cept maybe... Tierra de burro that place sucks."

"What, cant handle a burrito?" vinyl joked.

He sighs, "It just doesn't agree with me okay. please pick somewhere else."

"Fine... but fair warning, I'm feeling a little trashy tonight," She' says with an evil grin." Hmm, Hey Tavy. You remember that dive Berry Punch owns?"

"Do you mean that dreadful place that constantly looks like it's about to fall apart? What was it called? Spiked."

"Yeah, that's the place. I think it'll do nicely."

With a look of confusion, Donut interrupts. "Hey filly. Just so you know. I Am, treating you tonight. and I'm not exactly stingy with my bits. So feel free to pick somewhere........ Good."

Octavia looks to the DJ in a similar manner as Donut, "Love, I protest to the fact we're even doing this. But even I think we can do better than that."

Vinyl quickly leans into Octavia and whispers, "Don't worry Tavy I got it figured. If we go to a place that crap, there won't be any paparazzi waiting in the woodwork. The last thing I want is to be seen with this creep. Besides, It's the least romantic place I can imagine, Don't want him getting any ideas."

Octavia pulls away, not even bothering to whisper. "Yeah, I suppose that makes sense, Sorry Mr. Donut. But I'm afraid I have to side with Vinyl on this."

He rubs his temple and sighs. "Fine..... you want to go to a dive, So we will. Do they at least serve good drinks there?"

Chapter two, The bar

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter three, Bonbon and Lyra

Minutes later the couple found themselves frightfully bored as they sat there waiting to leave. In this time Vinyl had retrieved her drink and was now looking in Octavia's mirror.

"Hmm, I don't know Tavy," Vinyl said as she slides her hoof through her spiky mane. "I'm not sure I can pull off yellow highlights."

"Well, it couldn't hurt," Octavia said optimistically. "I just think adding yellow to your regimen of blue would give you a spectacular stage presence."

"Oh My Gosh, its Vinyl and Octavia.?!!!" a voice called bearing an unrealistically thick Manehatten accent.

"Vinyl tips her shades and leans back trying to pull off the coolest pose she could manage. "Yo Bonny, been a while. How's it going?"

"I'm fine, thanks for asking. Hey, I'm sorry I couldn't make it to you two's wedding. It's just, while I was in the hospital."

Octavia interrupts, "There's no need to apologize. Derpy told us everything. Speaking of which, how is your foal? I trust It's doing well."

"Why yes, Tootsie is doing great. Doctors were a little worried, because magical pregnancies are still pretty new and all. But everything turned out fine." She then sits down in Donuts abandoned chair and cracks a wry smile.

Vinyl flips up her shades and asks, "Hey Bonny why you smiling like that. It's kinda creeping me out."

In a mischievous manner only a seasoned gossip with her accent could pull off Bonbon replied, "Oh nothing...... I was just wondering since we're on the subject. When are you two planning on having foals of your own?"

Somehow, despite not drinking anything. Vinyl manages a rather impressive spit-take as she sat up in shock. "What the hay Bonny. You been hitting that weird booze again?"

Bonbon waves her hoof nonchalantly, "Vinyl, please. I don't do that...... What The!" All of a sudden, a pair of green hooves began tickling her sides savagely.

"HEE HEE, Come on Bonbon. Don't pretend I haven't caught you sneaking shots of the Cooking Absinthe."

Bonbon blushes and gently knocks the offending hooves away, "I told you Lyra. I was tasting it to make sure it was still good for the chocolate Pinky needed for that bachelorette party."

Lyra then kisses bonbon on the forehead, then turns to face her friends, "Riiiigghtt............Anyway. Arrrre, either of you planning on getting knocked up? It would be awesome if Tootsie could have a little friend to play with."

Almost instinctively, Vinyl steals away Octavia's giant beer mug and tries gulping down as much of its dark gold contents as possible.

Octavia pulls the mug away from her and puts it out of hoofs reach, "If you must know. We have been discussing it, unfortunately, Vinyl always gets like this at the mere mention of pregnancy."

Bonbon laughs, "it's not as bad as you think. One night of freaky fun, Then eleven months later you got a little bundle of joy to take care of. It's as Simple as that. I liked it so much I might even do it again someday."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves dear," Lyra protested."

"Ohhh, all right." The cream mare groaned.

"That's all fine for you Bonny," Vinyl says in a panic. "you stand behind a counter half the day. And the other half you're in the kitchen. Besides that, you're already kinda round. nopony even noticed when you got preggers!"

"Hmph, I'm not that big Vinyl!" Bonbon grumps crossing her forehooves angrily.

"Sorry, It's...... Just, I can't right now!" She panics further. "I mean there's the no drinking, And..... Don't you get like really sick all the time, or something? Besides!!!! What will the fans say if I walk up to my mixing table and I can't reach the records because my belly's too big?!!!!!!!" Starts hyperventilating.!!

Octavia pulls her wife in for a hug, "There, there. I told you before love. When it comes time for that, I will be more than happy to carry for us. In fact, I insist upon it."

Vinyl submits to the hug, "Really, you would do that?"

"Course love. Think I would be pretty good at it personally........ However, perhaps we should discuss this later," She says, glaring at the onlookers annoyedly.

Eventually, Lyra takes the hint and ask, "So what are you doing here anyway Vinyl. I thought Berry banned you after you made it big."

Vinyl reluctantly breaks from the hug and responds, "Oh, she did. But I think she's hitting the bottle extra hard tonight. I went up there earlier and she couldn't even tell it was me with clothes on. Too bad that didn't stop her from raving the whole time about how I look like me."

"Yikes... It's that bad," Lyra exclaimed. "I guess she did seem more off than usual, when she booked me earlier."

Octavia gasps, "my goodness. She hired you to play, HERE. And you excepted it."

"Hate to break it to ya Lyra, "Vinyl says concernedly. "Your music's nice and all. But I can just about guarantee, you set one hoof on stage with that harp of yours, and your gonna be knocked out before you can even reach the third bar."

"Yeah, I know," she groaned. "But what can I do? The candy store is gonna be in dry season until October. And I burned a lot of bridges so I could stay home and take care of Bonbon."

Taking the last swig of her beer Octavia places the mug in her purse. "If you're tight on bits, I know a prench place downtown that hires a lot of instrumentalists. It is a tad unsavory, Unfortunately. But I'm certain with my recommendation they would hire you in a second."

"Wait, do You mean the Sur l'eau? Because I actually already work there part-time."

"Oh, you do. Sorry then."

"Wait a minute," Vinyl says raising her hoof. "If you work in that fancy flank place. what the hay are you doing in this sty."

"Like I said its only part-time. Besides, I actually was supposed to play a concert there tonight. Unfortunately, my client had to cancel. Which sucks, because he was offering triple normal price."

Suddenly, a voice came from a point lower than the table. "Hey fillies, Sorry it took so long. The stallions room had this crazy line. Oh hello! Looks like we got some company."

Lyra quickly turns around and responds, "Wow, speaking of Tirek. Hey, what's up Big D. How come you're slumming it in this rat nest? Do you know how long it takes setting up those fancy candles you like."

He then walks up to Lyra and pats her on the shoulder. "Yeah, I know, Sorry about canceling the concert tonight." He then hoofs a bag over to her," here you go no hard feelings. That should cover what I owe ya."

Lyra stood jaw dropped, as she stared at the bit bag. "Well, thank you. This is going to help a lot. But I have to ask. Why are you here? This ain't your scene."

"Well, let's just say, my lovely dates thought that the venue was a little too sleazy."

"Pfftttt What, Wait A minute Wait a minute, hold on. So you are telling me. That you, are on a date with, these two." Bonbon says, pointing an accusing hoof at the adjacent couple, Who didn't look too pleased with the comment, "This is great."

Looking irritated, and Sensing the distress of Vinyl and Octavia, Donut walked up to Bonbon and looked her in the eye. Which
Somehow, despite his short stature, had a strange force about it, that gave Bonbon an uneasy sense of guilt as he approached.

"Miss, I know what your thinking. But let me assure you. Nothing like that has or will happen. I am simply a friend of Vinyl's, and all we're doing is having a friendly night out. That is all."

"I'm....... Sorry, I didn't mean anything by it"

Now talking a lot more sympathetically he says, "You don't need to apologize filly. Just Don't do it again okay? Running the rumor mill is never a good way to keep friends."

Vinyl laughs, "What... Are you Princess Sparkle now?"

"Nah, I just record a lot of PSA'S."

The whole group burst into laughter, but is quickly interrupted by the screech of a sound system blaring to life. Moments later, the drunken Berry punch stumbles onto the stage and taps the mic with her hoof.

"TESTING, TESTING," SCREECH," ONE-TWO-THREE TESTING, CAN ANYPONY HEAR ME?"

A random pony from the audience shouts, "Yes for the love of Celestia. Turn the volume down!"

The mare puts down the mic and yells, "Hey, Don't You Mention That bitch Here. This is Luna country."

When no response came, she picked the mic back up. "HMMMHF, RIGHT. ATTENTION EVERYPONY, JUST A REMINDER. TONIGHTS ENTERTAINMENT. 'LYRA MASTER OF THE TINY GOLDEN HARP,' WILL BE ON IN TEN MINUTES." A distinctive booing roared from the crowd, but was totally ignored by the inebriated mare. "DURING THAT TIME, ALL DRINKS ARE HALF OFF. BUT WILL BE LIMITED TO ONE DRINK PER PONY,"

She begins to walk off stage. But turns around and continues. "OH YEAH, TO THE OWNER OF THE RED AND BLUE BRAMBLY PARKED OUTSIDE. IT'S CURRENTLY BEING STRIPED FOR PARTS, THAT IS ALL."

Donuts eyes widen and he pulls an extendable baton from his pocket. "Oh No, Not Again," He yells as he gallops for the door.

Bonbon puts on a pair of brass hoofplates from her bag and follows him. "Wait up for me. I wanna to show those cart jackers just how we deal with their like in Bronkos."

Lyra sighs, then yell's, "Hey Bonbon, While you're out there, could you grab my lyre please?"

"Wait, she's Still, doing that vigilante thing?" Vinyl asked with more than a little concern."

Yeah, I know," Lyra facehoofed. "I was kinda hopeing, having Tootsie would have settled her down a little. But no such luck. Anyway, I guess I'll see you later. Based on that booing, I'm guessing It'll probably be in the hospital. You girls are right. This crowds going to eat me alive."

Vinyl pulls Lyra in close and nuggies her mane, "Filly, please. Do you really think we're going to leave you hanging?"

"Really, you want to help me?"

Octavia pats Lyra on the back, "Course mate.We would never leave ya in the creek without a paddle."

"Thanks girls. Tell you what, i'll meet you backstage. I just need to grab some liquid courage. You know, just in case."

As they walked away Octavia leans her head close to Vinyl, "Hey, do you know what that was back there. I mean, you know when Donut covered for us. He seemed much more assertive than I pegged him for."

Vinyl magics her glasses up and grimaced, "That's a little hard to explain Tavy. He's not the kind of pony you can just.... Mess with. I know he may not look like much. But trust me. I know first hoof how fucking scary he is if you get on his bad side. That's why I agreed to this."

"My goodness. He didn't threaten you did he?"

Vinyl's head twitches, "Sigh, No, nothing like that, I doubt He would ever hurt us. But, let's just say, he's always planning something. And he has a bad habit of going too far."

Octavia shrugs, "He seems like an alright sort to me, But I suppose I'll note that. However, I am still curious as to what he really wanted out of the night."

"What do you mean?" Vinyl asks with concern.

"It's as you said. He's always planning something, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, when we were at the house earlier, He made it sound like he was doing this to impress his friends. But he just went out of his way to make sure Bonbon didn't gossip about us. Surely that's something he would want if he was trying to get street cred."

Vinyl's head twitches again and a look of uneasy realization spread across the DJ's paler than normal face. "Hey, Tavy. Earlier you said that while I was gone, He taught you some bar games, right?"

"Yes?"

"Do you know what they were?"

Octavia was about to answer but stopped. She briefly looked at the floor as if struggling really hard. Suddenly her head begins twitching violently, "Weird,..... I know I had fun. But for some reason, I can't seem to recall any of it. Perhaps the sauce is finally taking its toll."

Without warning. Vinyl grabs Octavia and pulls her in for a big passionate hug.

"Oh, my. Normally I would say save it for home love, but............. Wait a minute. Is something wrong? Why are you crying?

The misty-eyed unicorn rests her head on Octavia's shoulder and repeated I'm sorry over and over again.

"Vinyl, what's wrong. You're scaring me."

"It's Nothing. Let's just leave, I'm so sorry I brought you here."

"Go now, but we promised we would help Lyra."

"But,........ But."

"A promise is a promise Vinyl," Octavia states authoritatively." I don't know what's come over you, but we gave our word we would help Lyra. Besides that we can't very well leave without Mr. Donut can we?"

****************************************************************
Some more crying, a cooldown session, and several minutes of looking around a dusty stage later.

"Love, are you sure there isn't a cello back here?" Asked Octavia pulling a dented xylophone out of a flyders nest.

"I doubt it," The DJ shrugged. "This place mostly does rock and rap. I don't think Berry would keep something like that around on standby."

"Bugger all, this simply won't do."

"Hey now Tavy, Don't worry about it. We'll think of something. Oh, I know, what about that?" She says pointing to a massive electric guitar strapped to the wall."

"That!!!, I thought that was a prop. It's far too big for anypony."

"No, it's real, I checked. I think it belonged to a dragon that performed here once. Just get yourself a bow and boom, instant cello."

"Alright, if you say so, love. But what about you? I don't see a turntable around,"

"Not a problem. Their's one set up under the stage. I just need to find the lever to raise it"

"Hey fillies, You see a clip mic for my lyre anywhere?" Asked Lyra as she trotted in levitating a cup of coffee.

Octavia replies, "Oh, there you are. Sorry mate, we can't find nothing in this dump."

Suddenly Bonbon gallops in panting.

"Back so soon dear, Not like you to let thieves off easy," Lyra said taking a sip of her coffee.

Panting, "Lyra I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I tried stopping them. But after Donut and me laid the smack down on a few. The rest just hopped in our cart and ran off."

"WHAT, YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME!!!!!," Lyra Exclaimed. "Oh No, my lyre was in there. What am I gonna do now?"

"Here we go, I found this normal mic," Octavia announced, holding up the item in question.

"What goods that gonna do me now?"

"You can sing right?"

"Well, yeah. But I mostly do ambiance. All the songs I know with lyrics are for foals."

Octavia lifts open the corner of the curtain and looked to the crowd. Every single pony in the front row alone, was wearing a spiky leather jacket, and had no less than two scars on their face.

"Yikes,!!" The cellist said with a look of mild fear. "We must think of something. I certainly don't want to make those ponies angry."

"Yeah its a pretty tough crowd out there," Vinyl says magically spinning a record on the tip of her hoof. "Wubs can only do so much, we need some lyrics."

"Oh, I know!" Bonbon says raising her hoof. "Lyra you can sing that fan song you were writing for that TV show you like."

"I guess that one would work," Lyra shrugged. "Can you two do jazz?"
****************************************************************

Minutes later the lights of the room dim as the ones on the stage illuminate. The curtains roll back and Lyra begins walking down the stage with her eyes closed. Following behind her was Octavia carrying her makeshift cello. She stops halfway down the stage and plants her instrument down in preparation. Vinyl trots out next and slams her hoof into the ground. Immediately a small elevator pushed a turntable up from under the stage. In the front, Lyra had just made it to the end and grabbed the mic.

♫Human beings fascinate me being just the way they are, Tell me little pony, why you pull a cart not drive a car? Lyre is my instrument but humans strum their sweet guitars,♫

♫It's a mystery, ANTHROPOLOGY,♫

♫Fingers, toes, and tiny noses brownish hair and tannish skin.
Would it be too much to ask to see the world they're living in?♫

♫Every'-Body tells me that its old and fake mythology
It's a mystery, ANTHROPOLOGY!♫

♫Aren't you bored of brushing your coat? Styling your mane with your hooves.♫

♫I don't mean to butt in or gloat But ancient history proves.♫

Mic static,"Everypony stop. There's an emergency!!!"

♫Humans don't have wings or magic they don't need it, they don't care.♫

♫All they've got's imagination New inventions everywhere!♫

♫Babies, children, teens, and elders all alike have clothes to wear.♫

"Mic static, "You on stage, shut up!!!"

♫It's so real to me, ANTHROPOLOGY!♫

♫germans.♫

♫irish.♫

♫french and polish.♫

♫Who's to say, that they're all gone?♫

Mic static, "Last warning!"

♫Maybe humans like us too and dress like us at Comic-Con!♫

♫It's so real to me, Anthropology!

♫Yeah, they've had a couple of fights.♫

♫Nobody's perfect, you seeeee!♫

♫Still, I say I'm born with the rights to study whatever I pleeeaaase!♫

♫Anthropology! ♫

Suddenly the music cut out as a loud bang was heard. All attention soon went to a giant earthpony standing over by the bar with a smoking shotgun. "EVERYPONY SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!! THIS IS NOT, A ROBBERY. MY BOSS IS HURT OUTSIDE SO ANYPONY WHO KNOWS MEDICINE NEEDS TO GET THE FUCK OUT THER!!!"

Random noises from the crowd.

He fires again, "DID I STUTTER?! SOMEPONY GET OUT THER AND HELP MY BOSS, NOW!!!!

Chapter four, a long talk

The creak of wagon wheels was heard as the DJ stared at her semi-conscious wife, gently stroking her long black mane. She barely even noticed when a tiny unmarked bottle rolled off the seat onto the floor.

Suddenly an inappropriately calm voice calls out from the front of the carriage breaking Vinyl's concentration."So, pretty crazy what happened back there?"

Her response was swift and cruel, "SHUT UP!"

"I talked to some of the officers on the scene, and apparently a Griffen girl got roasted right outside the bar."

"SHUT UP."

"She's lucky to be alive, Unfortunately, according to the witness, she's the daughter of some Canterlot Bigshot. So odds are the whole police force is gonna be run ragged looking for the culprit."

"I SAID SHUT UP JACKASS!!!!!"

"Hey now, no need to be snappy. I was just trying to start a conversation."

Vinyl growls then looks to Octavia's face and saw that she was now fully unconscious, "Okay she's out, pull over."

Finally, she must be one tough filly to last that long."

Vinyl rolls her eyes as she carefully wedges Octavia onto the seat so she won't fall, "She is, Now are you sure that crap you slipped her only last twenty minutes?"

"Relax, it's only a mild sedative. We use it on perps all the time."

"I, asked, does it only last twenty minutes?" Vinyl growls.

"Well, that's the average at least. for somepony like her, it might not last as long."

"Then I guess we should hurry this up."

With that, the two head towards a nearby alley.

Upon entering the shadows, Donut is immediately sprawled out on the ground courtesy of a swift kick to the face

"OUCH!! What the hay filly. I thought we were getting along."

OH, we were. That is until you decided to brain rape my wife!!!" Vinyl then draws a sharpened butter knife out of her mane and brandishes it aggressively.

Donut raises his hoof as if he were about to ask a question, "Two things filly."

"DONT CALL ME THAT," Screamed the DJ.

"One, I have always been better at magic then you," His horn sparks and a second later the blade of Vinyl's knife was so flush with the handle it was unusable. "And two. What, The Hay, are you talking about? I would never do something like that."

Vinyl tosses away her useless knife and gets in Donuts face, "Don't pull that crap. I saw the look in her eyes. ponies only look like that after you get done with them."

"Ummm, what,...............Oh No, er, I mean, Don’t worry she's fine."

"Fine, you think she's fine!!," Her head begins to twitch, "yeah, I'm sure she's fine!! Just like all the other ponies you've done this too!! Do you even remember Mrs. Loose?! Cuz they've been calling her Barking Mad, ever since you got done with her."

Donut blinks, "Wait, hold on. you remember that too?"

"OF COURSE I DO," She yelled. "She was my neighbor, How could I forget? How the hay did you even know her anyway?"

"I assume, We've been over this," He announces annoyedly. "How was I supposed to know the dog personality was the dominant one? I was trying to help her okay."

"THERE IS NOTHING OKAY ABOUT THIS YO NUTS!!!" She yelled. "Now because of you, and your stupid crush. I'm gonna wake up every morning terrified my wife suddenly thinks she's a farm animal."

"That's not how it works Vinyl. She's gonna be fine."

The Dj's head shook harder and harder as she somehow closed the gap between them even tighter, "Why can't you get it through your thick Skull, I, DONT, LIKE, YOU?"

"I."

"We have nothing in common," She interrupts. We barely Even Know Each Other, "she hollers. So why, The Fuck, do you keep obsessing over me like this??"

"Well."

"Why do you even care if my wife isn't a pony? I don't, why should you?"

With an angry look in his eyes, Donut stands up and pushes Vinyl away. "Because I wasn't about to let my little sister get used and abused by some monster that's why!"

Vinyl takes a step back, "Wait, what now?"

"Enough of this," He yells taking a step forward, "I should have done this a while ago,"

Vinyl takes another step back and trips on a discarded bottle,
"Hey, stay back, I'm warning you."

The stallion sarcastically rolls his eyes then takes another step forward. suddenly his horn flashes and he yells, "Verum Recordabor!"

A semblance of daylight filled the alley as the arcane words reverberated in the DJ's mind.

Vinyl blinks, Then she blinks again, She then gets up from the ground and a scowl crosses her albino face, "What, The Fuck. you actually made me forget you were my brother, Not cool dude."

"Hey, this wasn't fun for me either," He defended. " do you have any idea how disgusting it felt hitting on you like that. I had to retake my undercover training course twice just so I wouldn't vomit."

Vinyl glares, "Why the hay are you here Donut? You better not tell me the folks put you up to this."

Donut winced, "Well i."

"They did, didn't they? Come on Bro, I thought you were cool with me being gay."

Hey now, it's not like that at all. I think its great you like mares. I do too, it gives us something to talk about."

"Then why did you agree to this?"

"Because I missed you Vi," He said bluntly. "I haven't seen you at all since you ran away from home. You didn't even invite me to your wedding, whats up with that?"

Vinyl rubs her hoof, "It's complicated."

"Whats complicated? I punched dad square in the face when he told me to use my powers to, 'Fix You.' As he put it, Doesn't that count for anything?"

"It does, I swear it does. but well...... I didn't invite you because, I figured mom and dad would think that extended to them too.
Speaking of which, what the hay was this about anyway? I thought they realized I was done with them after they told me to stop seeing Tavy. Why do they even care anymore? I'm apparently against everything they believe in."

"They care because your still their little filly Vi. You have to understand it's not entirely their fault."

"How do you figure that?" she snarled.

"Because the roots of the old country are still dug into them. Listen Vi. The night you left they, Said things, That they quickly regretted."

"They better regret that," She interrupts. "How dare they say that about grandma she loved me."

"Yes, that was a big one," Donut interrupts back. "But I've been working with them. And I think they're finally ready to accept you for who you are."

"About time," Vinyl snipped. But you still haven't told me why you did this."

Fine, I'll tell you," He sighed. "Hmmm, how do I put this? You see, I got mom and dad to at least, Accept, that you like mares. But they were still suspicious of Octavia."

"Suspicious of what? They never even met her."

"That's the thing. They learned about her from that copy of Musicians weekly."

"Oh really," Vinyl quipped.

"Yeah, I know. But trust me they looked through it. They didn't just look at the cover and decide, they didn't like what they saw."

"Realy."

"Yeah, Honestly I think you would be impressed how much they've improved. Mom was a little upset that you weren't the one in the dress. But that wasn't the problem."

"So why don't they like Tavy then?"

"Well they looked through the magazine and they got to see all her achievements, You know, Like that orchestra she ran, The awards she won, Oh, And all those celebrities she met."

"And whats wrong with that?"

"How do I put this gently?" He squirmed. "They think she's some kind of elitist snob."

Wha-ha-hat, "Tavy an elitist snob. HA Ha Ha, You got to be kidding. Yea shes a bit of a neat freak, But a snob, Really. Half the time shes more unwound then I am."

"Snobs kinda putting it mildly, to be honest," He says with a grimace. "I mean it was getting damn straight xenophobic in there. I genuinely never knew dad hated Trottingham so much."

"I thought you said they were getting better."

"They are, About the gay thing. But..... when they found out she was from Trottingham. That just opened a whole new can of worms. Dad actually said, and I quote." Donut clears his throat, "She's using her, I just know it. Those damn traitors are always planning something."

Vinyl blinks, "Wait, Traitors?"

Yeah, something about the war with Labarinthia," He shrugged," Don't know what that's about. But anyway, That is where I come in. surprisingly after all that they still want to give Octavia a chance. So they asked me to do a little background check. I didn't want too, but i thought it would set their minds at ease."

"But it didn't end there."

"No, Unfortunately. You see, At first, I was just going to give her record a quick look through and give her a pass. But at the last minute, I found some info that didn't make sense. I'll be honest, I wanted to ignore it so badly. But my detective instincts kicked in, and well, I had to know more."

"What happened then?"

"Gotta tell ya Vi. It was a lot to take in. every new thing I found lead me further and further down a rabbit hole. It was insanity, Days without sleep, Weeks stuck in the library. I almost lost my job cuz of this. There was just something wrong about Octavia, and when I finally found out what."

"That's when you called me last week," Vinyl interrupts.

"Yes," he said bluntly. "But you told me to stay out of it, and hung up."

"Can you blame me?"

"listen Vi, I'm not proud of what I did but...... I just needed to know you were safe. so I planted that message in your mind just so I could get close to Octavia. To make it worse I messed up the spell pretty badly, I can't believe you actually drew a knife on me."

"yeah, what was that anyway? I was totally convinced you were some kind of monster."

Suppressing an entire childhood of memories is pretty hard. I guess I missed some things. probably should have expected it. I mean, My decision to brainwash you Was pretty hasty," He shrugged." Originally, I was actually just going to meet you in the market and Talk to you about meeting Octavia myself. But I got nervous and went with this dumb idea instead.

"I still don't get what your plan even was."

"It was for a test I was conducting on Octavia. You see, there's no real way of being subtle about this..... I found evidence that suggests she may have killed a previous spouse out of jealousy. And I was curious about what her reaction to bringing that up would be... As well as a few other things. Not sure if you care or, not. But she did pass my test with flying colors, for what its worth."

"Tavy was there the day you did this to me. Why didn't you interview her there and get it over with?"

"Two reasons, I needed to know how she acted before and after her secret was found out, And I wanted her to think I could be fun to hang out with before I went psycho on her. I admit, This wasn't my best plan," He shrugged.

"No kidding," Vinyl interrupts grumpily

"Hey give me some credit, When I came up with this I hadn't slept in like two days."

"Listen Bro, since you meant well. I guessss, I can forgive you for all this crap. Maybe, But I gotta ask, was it even worth it?"

"Oh yes definitely," He gleamed. "It certainly made me feel better, And now I don't think I need to worry if you decide to confront her yourself."

"And, Why do I need to confront her?"

"Because you love her sis, That's why. Don't you wanna know who the pony you love really is."

"What if its none of my business? She didn't tell me why should I ask?"

"You shouldn't have to ask she should have told you the truth herself, you married her. You two were planning on having foals together. Don't you think it's your right to know the truth?"

Vinyl stomps down angrily, "Damn it why. why did you have to tell me? I could have gone my whole life without knowing about this."

"Listen Vi, I'm not going to tell you what to do. But you gotta trust me on this one. I know from personal experience, that no healthy relationship, anywhere has a secret this big."

Suddenly The stallions watch starts beeping,"WOOPS, Speaking of which. Sorry Vi I gotta bail, Foal sitter refuses to stay after eight."

"But wait," Vinyl pleaded, "What about."

"You'll get them tomorrow," He interrupts."Once you have them you can do whatever you want."

"But,"

"By the way," He interrupts again."Mom and dad wanted me to tell you, you're still invited to Hearths Warming if you want to come. If you do, make sure you bring Octavia. there very interested in meeting her."

Without another word, Donut leaves the alley and Vinyl behind.

More than a little confused the Dj walks out as well.

Upon returning to the cart she was met by Octavia who had just finished stumbling out and looked like she was about to fall over, "Oh there you are Love. Do you know were that Donut fellow went?"

Vinyl paused then looked to the side. "Oh,..........um,.......Oh yeah, he got a call from the bar. Turns out they did need him."

"Bloody hay," Octavia Moaned. "How are we supposed to get home now?"

Vinyl shrugged, "We could always walk."

"Walk, are you mad? were two drunk mares miles from our home in the dead of the night."

Vinyl put a hoof to her chin, "hmm,........ You got a point there.......... Oh, I know, we can take the cart. I'm sure Bro, Err, I mean Donut won't mind."

"How are we supposed to take the cart Vinyl?" Octavia said concernedly. "I'm too tipsy, and you don't even have a pulling license."

"Oh please," the DJ waved confidently, "I can drive the Wub-mobile how hard can pulling a cart be?"

Chapter five, Party's End

The next morning.

All was quiet within the walls of Vinyl and Octavia's comfortable home, as the rays from Celestia's sun warmed the couple lying down in their bed.

Suddenly, The tranquility was broken as a manic incomprehensible noise tore through the Dj's mind. Without a second thought, she removes her headphones and turns off the alarm on her phone.

She then looks to the side and sees Octavia laying there flat on her back with an odd but pleasant grin.

Feeling somewhat afraid, Vinyl couldn't help but lean over and plant a kiss on the sleeping earthpony, in hopes it would bring herself luck.

Not wanting to delay the inevitable further she climbed out of bed and made certain the bedside clock was unplugged. After that, she proceeded down the stairs.

As she went she noticed the various photos that adorned the wall, each one held some kind of precious memory.

In passing, Vinyl saw what she believed to be her very favorite photo. It was one she had taken with Octavia on the night of their first date.

viewing this snapshot of her life gave her a Warm feeling so she grabbed it and continued to the front door.

leaving the house she was met with an image she was until now unsure if she should expect. Wrapped around their busted mailbox was a pile of still-smoldering wreckage. One that probably could have been called a cart at some point.

Vinyl briefly smacks the night old alcohol from her lips before mumbling something about insurance and proceeding to check the mail.

On the ground amongst the letters that had fallen from the dented mailbox was. a large box wrapped in tape marked only with a note saying never again featuring crude drawings of a cart and Donuts golden ring cutiemark.

With a sigh, Vinyl gathered all the items and levitated them into the house an onto the kitchen table, With that out of the way Vinyl turns on the coffee maker and sits down to begin looking through the box.

Vinyl had always been impressed by Donuts skill, but this seemed overboard even for him. In the box were aged photos and pictures old paintings all of which featuring ponies who bear an uncanny resemblance to the mare Vinyl had awoken next to. stuffed into the side was an envelope containing birth certificates arrest records and newspaper clippings. However, the largest item in the box was an absurdly old looking book.

"The Spirit Renascitur." Vinyl said to herself reading the cover of the ancient tome. And no sooner had she spoken the words Octavia trotted in holding her head to the side.

"Good morning dear, yawwwwn."

"Morning Tavy."

"Do you know where the tablets are? got a real head splitter this morning."

"Oh, yeah there on the counter by the sugar."

"Thanks love."

"Hey, Tavy. when you're done with that could you grab us some coffee and sit down...there's.............. something we need to talk about."

the end.

Author's Note

If you made it this far i want to thank you again for reading this. Feel free to tell me what you think.