Heart
The Only Chapter
Load Full StoryAuthor's Note
EDIT: <JUNE 2018
So, uh, I'm putting this back up. I know it's pretty bad, but I'd rather not delete my bad stuff. It shows growth, and I hate it when other people do it. Soooo
OLD:
Heya y'all, I finally decided to write another fic.
TBH, I really didn't like "When We Change", and I doubt I'll finish it. For now, I'm keeping it on hiatus until I've made a final decision, but I think it's derailed to all hell now.
Yeah, so this Fic was originally going to be called "Tulip" and each of the little stories were going to revolve around tulips, then in the end there's this whole meme with Rarity and tulips (because Tulips mean everlasting love according to Google [that and they are my favorite flower]).
Yeah, but I hope you enjoyed my stupid fanfic.
PS. Yes, the Rainbow Dash part was supposed to be after the Twilight part.
PPS. The day I posted this (it feels weird writing that because I'm posting it now, but whatever) Shortmane commented on one of my stories. So that's cool. I'm guessing they did it because they saw me follow them, and wanted to see who I was and whatever. But it's still cool. Hey, if you're reading this, I think you're a cool dude, and I like your fics. Especially the Rarijack one.
PPPS. ![]()
The Only Chapter
Applejack hastily galloped down the autumn leaves of Sweet Apple Acres, the last cart of the season attached via yolk at her waist. Darn, darn, darn! Late again! Applejack looked up at the setting sun, as she hurried even faster. Late, always late! The barn grew close and closer to the earth pony. She skidded to a halt as her hooves dug into the dirt. She haphazardly threw the yolk on the ground, letting it plop into a puddle of mud. Gotta go, gotta go! She rushed over to a table where she had set down a bag of bits in preparation, and the them under her hat. She turned, yelled a goodbye to Big Mac (who had been trying to fix the barn door all afternoon) and galloped into town.
While she sprinted, desperately attempting to be on time, she could feel a burning start in her chest. A… a cramp? It certainly took her by surprise. How could such an athletic, strong pony as herself get a cramp from running down the streets? She never got cramps working the farm! Heck, she never got cramps during The Running of the Leaves. She assumed it was due to a lack of hydration that day, as she slightly slowed her pace. What was it that Twilight said? You get more dehydrated during the Winter than in the Summer? And Winter-Wrap up day was only in a month or so anyway.
As she briskly trotted to her destination, the noticed the Ponyville Flower shop building up a greenhouse. Clever, she thought to herself. Now they can grow an’ sell flowers in the winter too. Double the profit almost, she thought. The builder’s instinct inside her urged the earth pony to assist, but she shook it off, knowing that she'd better not be any later than she already was.
She ended up quickly finding the restaurant (The Trottingham Tavern, a newly founded chain that had finally managed to reach Ponyville) and felt a pang of embarrassment realizing that every pony else was there waiting for her. She waved a hoof, then tilted her hat in salutations. Before even reaching the huddle of ponies outside, Applejack called out, “Sorry ah’m late, y’all. Ah lost track of time, and ah wanted to do all of tomorrow's chores too.”
Applejack looked to the ground in shame. “Applejack, you're only five minutes late. Really, it's no worry,” Rarity chimed.
“Ah know. But ah can't stand to make y'all wait like that.”
A waiter came over to the group. “Table for six?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at Twilight.
“That's us!” she replied cheerfully back. “‘Guess you came just in time, Applejack.”
The six trotted behind the waiter to a table at the back of the room, beside a window and a large mural of a the silhouetted island country which Trottingham called home.
The waiter handed out six menus to the ponies, ordered drinks, and left to get them. Applejack looked over to Rainbow Dash, who sat to her left. She soon noticed Applejack was staring at her, then gave a forced smile. Applejack looked away and frowned. Rainbow Dash leaned over to Applejack, and plastered on a forced smile. “I’d bet they put us in the back ‘cuz of Pinkie Pie.”
Applejack looked across the table to see Pinkie Pie gawking at every little detail in the restaurant. Quite loudly. Despite thinking the joke was funny, Applejack didn't respond, and stuck her nose in the menu.
Rainbow leaned away from Applejack, dropping her very fake smile immediately. “Come on AJ,” she said through clenched teeth. “You can't stay mad at me forever!”
Applejack continued to ignore for a moment longer. “Fine. I forgive you, or whatever” she said, without even a miniscule segment of forgiveness in her voice.
“Ugh… look, I’m sorry, okay! Truly! I feel awful!” By this time, her voice had raised, and the other girls had paused their conversation to eavesdrop. “Listen,” Rainbow Dash’s voice softened slightly, apparently realizing how loud she was being. “I am really, really, really, sorry, okay? I just feel terrible for doing what I did, but I've been apologizing for weeks now, okay? What else do you want me to do?”
After a brief and awkward silence, conversation between the mares slowly picked up once again. “Sorry, Dash. Ah Don't know, ah…” Applejack said, as kindly as she could. “Ah just feel betrayed. Ah trusted you and you really let me down.” Rainbow Dash did feel awful, Applejack knew that, but her heart forced her to feel anger, and she soon convinced herself that Rainbow Dash had ruined her night.
There it was again. The cramp. It came back, a blazing fire in the pony’s chest. Darn it, Applejack thought. It's gotta be dehydration. As if on queue, the waiter came to their table with the drinks they ordered. She stared down the mug of cider the waiter had put in front of her. She sent her memory to earlier that morning, trying to remember if she had drank at all that day. She thought back to waking up and quickly heading outside, eager to finish her chores to free-up the weekend.
Her face went pale as she realized something. Her vision went hazed, and red as she stood. “Applejack, darling, is everything alright?”
Applejack’s ears rang in terror. “Ah…” She did her best to calm herself and sat back down. “Yeah. Just remembered ah forgot to do a chore is all.”
If there was one thing Applejack was, she was not a good liar. But, having just had one quarrel about personal issues, none of the other girls decided to question Applejack further. Rarity still looked skeptically at her friend. Those weren't cramps, were they? she asked herself. That's okay, just calm down. Everythin’s okay. Everythin’s fine. She looked out the window to see the cloudy night sky begin to produce the first drizzles of a rainstorm. The “cramp” came back. Slow deep breaths Applejack. It's okay. Everythin–”
“Shoot! I forgot there was going to be a thunderstorm today! Sorry, girls. Hopefully it'll be done by the time we've finished eating.”
Applejack’s then fast paced heartbeat merged into a heavy throb. Applejack. Stay calm. You've only missed one. Only one, your entire life. Thunder struck outside. Applejack jumped, as a bead of sweat began to form on her brow. I need to go. I can't stay here. What if.… Memories began to fill into Applejack’s head. The room started spinning. Applejack stood up fast, not sure what to do, but sure about what was about to happen.
“Applejack‽” Everyone at the table looked with a terrified stare. Applejack’s jaw hung low as she began gasping for air. She fell to the ground, and began grasping for the table. The other patrons were quick to turn themselves into bystanders, circling around the table. The window by the table shattered, and a rainbow trail shined in the storm. A boom could be headed in the distance. One that was substantially louder than the rest of the storm’s thunder.
“Twilight, what's going on‽” Rarity screamed as she helplessly.
Rarity’s shouting seemed to snap Twilight out of her shocked trance. “I–I don't know. I–I….” Twilight stammered.
Applejack’s eyes withheld an essence of an emotion that far surpasses that of unrelenting terror, and one that can only truly be understood if you've seen such expression firsthand. Her mouth seemed to lazily hang open. The only thing proving that it was forced where the gasps for air that would come into her mouth, with a raspy wheeze. Applejack's right hoof pounded at her bosom, like she was desperately trying to break her own rib; or, perhaps more accurate, as if the pony was a bloodthirsty cannibal trying to dig through flesh.
As Rarity pleaded for Twilight to think of something to do (the hysterics of the moment catching up relatively early) Rainbow Dash flew through the door of the restaurant, surrounded by doctors. She swooped Applejack’s shaking body, and threw it into the back of an ambulance carriage. She was quick to strap herself in before letting the pegasus stallion, and took off with an uncanny speed, one that couldn't be matched by any pony other than Rainbow Dash. The girls sprinted after the rainbow wake, desperation taking a choking grasp around the throat, as it tends to do in times of peril. As they ran, their minds were all empty. Their brains simply refused to think, and transferred all the unused energy to their galloping legs. Another boom of thunder rang through the night sky as they all prayed for the safety of their friend.
***
-Heart attack?
-Yeah… no doubt about it… the only question is how?
-Family history, I think… major predisposer. I think one of her parents went that way.
-Hey, how about we save the questions for later, and worry about saving this mare’s life!
-Right, right….
-Alright, got the IVs in, vitals should be on… now. Wait, hang on…. Okay. We're good.
-Did she have any medical ID on her?
-I mean, we can check the records once we get there, but we didn't find anything on her when we arrived.
-The vitals are starting to slow down… I think she's about to go dark.
-It means we have to hurry.
***
A tulip fell down from Fluttershy’s mouth. It fell quickly to its spot under the shade of a tombstone. She walked over to another grave, only a few paces from the last, and dropped another another one. And another. And another. Until….
Fluttershy let out a surprised yelp as she bumped into a mourner. The tulip fell to the ground. “Oh, Applejack, I didn't see you there, I'm so sorry!”
Applejack reset herself and sighed a deep, elongated sigh. “ It's alright Fluttershy.” Applejack closed her eyes and went back to bowing her head. Fluttershy, at first, just awkwardly stood a few feet behind the orange pony, and stared at the tombstone. She contemplated whether or not to initiate conversation, not knowing how her friend would react to such a personal subject as her own parent's death. Lucky for her, Applejack spoke first. “What's with the flowers?” She didn't open her eyes.
“Oh,” Fluttershy said, in her typical always-startled fashion. “Some days, I like to bring flowers from my garden over and place them on—” she seemingly choked on the word “—the graves…. Just an act that I think will lighten the hearts of their families.”
Fluttershy smiled. Applejack did not. Rather, she said, “Funny, ah don't remember seein’ any flowers on mah parents’ grave other than mine.”
Fluttershy blushed. “Oh, well, I just do it randomly, I don't really, um, look at the names.” She was lying. She knew exactly where the Apples’ tomb was, (two rows back, third one from the right) and she always chose to avoid it. Perhaps it was the weird feeling of giving your friend's deceased parents flowers, or maybe it wasn't the fear of being caught by an Apple, but Fluttershy never chose to flower that spot.
It was growing evident that Applejack had believed Fluttershy's little white lie, as she gave no further comments and continued to pray in silence. Fluttershy turned to the gate, prepared to leave, but before she trotted out to carry on her errands, she knelt down silently beside Applejack and placed a tulip next to a bouquet of buttercups that Applejack had brought.”I appreciate that,” Applejack said, hardly breaking a whisper. “Ah’m the only one in mah family who mourns ‘em.” Seeing this as an opportunity to make amends for her (albeit unknown to Applejack) lie, Fluttershy sat down beside her friend. “The day they…” the following silence was long enough to fill in the blank, “Granny got so angry and so sad, she tore everything resemblin’ them out of the house.” Fluttershy uncomfortably shifted her weight, not knowing the correct way to respond. Applejack continued, “And so, after the first few months, she'd made it like they never existed. She'd not even let us go it the cemetery.” Applejack sniffed, pulling Fluttershy's attention away from the Tombstone and onto Applejack. She was shaking, but it seemed to be out of anger more than sadness. “And just like that, Granny managed to kill them again.”
Fluttershy leaned in and hugged Applejack, squeezing her in embrace until the shaking stopped. “I'm sorry.” The contagiousness of tears was evident as Fluttershy began to cry for her friend.
Applejack gave a chuckle (although, it was hard to call it that, ingenuine as it was) “Aw, ‘s alright, Fluttershy. It's better now. We've got pictures up in the house now, we talk about ‘em…. It's honestly a breath of fresh air, ya’ know? It's like they're back again, kinda.”
***
-We're losing her, can't she fly any faster?
-Are you joking? There's a Wonderbolt out there! We're going as fast as we can!
-Damnit! Savior, get the De-Fib ready, just in case.
-Yes Mam.
-Is she awake?
-I think she's out cold right now…. How are those vitals looking?
-Umm, fine. Their speeding up a bit, actually. I think she's waking… oh, they're going back down now.
-Keep an eye on that, will you? If it changes at all, tell me.
***
“Oh, Applejack! Perfect!” Twilight Sparkle leaped like a schoolfilly over to the farm pony, who, at the time, was carrying a rather large wagon of apples from the market back to the farm.
“Oh, hey Twi. You look… excited”
“I'm doing just fine, Applejack, how was your day?” Twilight sounded almost robotic.
“It was… well, I didn't sell too many apples today, so I guess it wasn't all that good…. Could ‘ave been, um, worse though.”
“Do youuuuuuu, wanna talk about it?” Twilight levitated a clipboard and a quill, almost presenting them to the farmer.
“Um… not really?”
“Please? I've been reading a lot about psychology lately (mostly because I've read everything else) and I really want to apply it to real life!”
Always being eager to please, Applejack gave in. “Heh, heh, alright then, sugarcube.”
The two walked (after Applejack had dropped off her unsold apples, of course) side-by-side to Twilight's castle.
As Applejack trailed Twilight inside, she noticed that the Castle’s living room was set up in the most clishé phycologist’s room trope ever. Straight out of the movies. Applejack sighed and lied down on Twlight’s couch. “Okay, Applejack,” Twilight began, taking out her clipboard. “So tell me, what has been bothering you?”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “Nothin’ much. Ah’ve been just fine.”
“Hmmm…” Twilight wrote something down, Applejack was sure it was something trivial. “Didn't you say that you had a bad day today though?” Twilight had the face of an attorney who just provided the court with undeniable evidence.
“Ah mean, sure, my day was bad, but that's small potatoes. My life’s good!”
Twilight wrote something down again. “Nothing? Nothing is bothering you at all?” She raised an eyebrow inquiringly.
Applejack raised her’s back suspiciously in reply. What had she heard? “No Twi, nothing….” She perplexed herself trying to figure out why Twilight was being so… pushy. There's no way she could read her thoughts, right? “Ah mean, come on Twi, there ain't nopony more honest than me!”
Twilight shrugged, sighed, then put the clipboard down. “You win Applejack; I guess I'll just find somepony else to help me.”
Applejack bit her lip occultly as she stood. “Sorry I couldn't help.”
As are began her trot to the door, Twilight called out hesitantly, “I worry about you Applejack.”
This caught Applejack by surprise. “S-sorry?”
“I said I worry about you. You seem all fine and happy, and you aren't afraid to let others know how you feel, but….” Twilight looked down, a mix of caution and embarrassment on her face. Applejack unpatiently awaited the ending of Twilight's sentence. “But I talked to… the other girls….” Twilight glanced up quickly to see the already arising anger in Applejack’s face. “And they all think you're—”
“What?” Applejack asked starkly. “Depressed?”
“No, no” Twilight waved her hoof. “Not depressed… just… hurting.” Applejack winced at the word choice. “I talked to Fluttershy, and she said she saw you at the graveyard two weeks ago, acting sad.”
Applejack’s temper skyrocketed at the absurdity of Twilight's claim. “Of course ah was actin’ sad. I was mournin’! Gosh! You're just as as as Dash!”
“But…” Twilight continued, aware now of her poor choice in accusations. “She also said you went the next three days as well!” Twilight stuck out her right hoof in a point, like an overenthusiastic attorney would.
Applejack scoffed and began to leave the room. “Oh, so if ah want to say hi to my parents, it means ah’m depressed. Wow. Real friendly of y'all.”
“Wait, Applejack,” Twilight pleaded. “Rainbow Dash told me not to tell you….”
Applejack stopped in her tracks as her heart lept. “Tell me what?”
Twilight nervously looked around the room, clearly regretting what she had said. “Well, first, I'm sorry I tricked you into—”
“No, no, no,” Applejack began to step closer. “What did Dash tell you?”
“Look, AJ, she was worried about you, we all were, and she felt really bad about telling it….” Twilight’s words were in vain, as Applejack huffed and turned. She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it. She shook her head. In a flash of magic, Twilight teleported in the doorframe, blocking her friend from exiting. “Hey, how about we all go out to dinner next Friday?”
“Are ya’ serious? You can't just insult me, change the subject, then invite me to dinner!”
Twilight put a hoof on Applejack’s shoulder. “Come on, please?”
“No, Twi, you're insane if you think that ah'll accept such an offer right outta’ nowhere!” Applejack stomped a hoof. “And especially if Dash will be there! Ah can't believe she just betrayed me like that!”
“Hey, it'll give us a chance to talk this all over, and you can tell the girls how you've been feeling… plus, you know,” Twilight ruffled her wings. “It's been a long time since we've all hung out… and life's been going really fast lately….”
Applejack rolled her eyes. “Fine.”
***
-Yeah? And why not? I'm the one who carried the—
-Listen, mam, you can't go in there until we are sure she's perfectly okay….
-I couldn't care LESS about your DAMN rules! She's my friend and I DEMAND you let me in!
-Mam, mam, calm down, calm down! Security!
-It’s fine, savior. Mam, we can't let you in just right now, but know that we are doing everything we can to make sure you can see her ASAP.
-Yeah? Then why is it TAKING SO DAMN LONG‽
-Shh! Please miss! Sigh… look, we had to perform a defibrillator resurrection, okay?
-W-what does that mean?
-It means we restarted her heart.
-It means she died five minutes ago.
***
Alone.
The sun set, a lonely star crawling down behind a lonely hilltop, in a lone sky. All while a lonely watched from atop another hill. She sat, and watched the sun set slowly as her heart ached. Tears formed on her eyes as she quietly sang to herself in a whisper.
The sun finally finished setting, and by then, the floodgates had fully opened. Applejack fought back for a moment, but ultimately gave in, and let the tears flow. It felt… relieving.
“A-Applejack?” A familiar raspy voice came from behind her. Without even being able to comprehend who said the voice, in a swoop, she felt a comforting embrace wrap around her. The thought of attempting to hold back her tears lingered once more, but Applejack pushed it back and returned the hug. She let her tears dampen Rainbow Dash’s shoulder, not caring how childish or weak she looked. They stayed in the embrace for what seemed like hours, until Applejack's tears finally subsided, and even a little while after that. “Look, AJ, I'm…. I'm not good at the whole wishy-washy stuff, but, um….” Rainbow spoke in a low voice, ever so slightly loosing her hug. “Do you want to, like, talk about it?” Applejack vigorously shook her head. “You sure?” Vigorous nodding. “I mean, you were kinda just crying… looking off into the sunset… on a cliff….”
“Ah know, but…” Applejack’s voice was broken, and didn't raises I've a whisper. Rainbow Dash struggled to make out what she was saying. “Ah really don't want to. Just…” she broke the embrace fully. “Thank you. Ah guess I needed that.”
Rainbow Dash refused. “Applejack, tell me, please. You're scaring me.”
“Ah just…. Ah just had a rough day, is all.”
Silence.
“Applejack,” Rainbow Dash hesitated. “You weren't up here to…” she choked on her own words. “To… jump, were you?”
Applejack recoiled. “No! Of course not! I can't believe you'd think that!”
“Sorry, sorry, I just… I worry, alright?”
Applejack looked up to see the tears forming in Dash’s eyes. “Right, right,” she tried to hold back her anger. “Look, ah appreciate the comfort and the concern. But please don't tell the other girls about this? Will ya’?”
Rainbow Dash hesitated. “AJ, I'm all about keeping secrets and stuff but this is different.”
Applejack stood up quickly. “Rainbow, please,” she begged. “Ah don't want any of the girls thinkin’ that there's somethin’ wrong with me, and you know they will!”
Rainbow Dash looked on the ground and frowned. “Fine, I guess. Just promise me you're telling the truth,” she took a step closer. “Just a rotten day, right?”
Applejack swallowed. “‘Course.”
***
-Alright, you can come in now.
-Does her family know?
-Yeah, we sent someone over a few minutes ago. I suspect we'll have the whole Apple family here in minutes.
-Good. And did you see the rest of my friends come in?
-I think they'll be here… ah, there they are now.
-Hey.
-Hi.
-Are we allowed to go in yet?
-Yeah, I'm just… a little afraid. We weren't exactly on the right hoof when she…. Yeah…
-I'm sure she'll understand, darling.
-Girls, she's starting to wake up, so be ready. She might be confused, so let me talk first.
-Okay. Come on AJ, time to wake up.
***
“Ugh… my… everythin’ hurts.”
“Applejack!” all the girls yelled, completely ignoring the doctor’s requests. They all dived onto the hospital bed in a large group hug.
The doctor sighed. “Fine, fine, I'll let you speak with your friends, but after visiting hours are up, I'm going to talk with you about what could have caused the arrest, okay?”
Applejack agreed with a weary smile. “Welp, sorry about that girls. Ah guess the fates really don't want me to have a day off, now do they?” she chuckled. The smiles and silence that followed expressed more joy as relief than any words could. “Oh, Rainbow,” Applejack turned her head to face her pegasus friend. “Ah’m sorry ah held such a grudge, ah guess ah was actin’ more than just ‘sad’ and all.”
Rainbow Dash hit Applejack’s shoulder playfully. “Hey, I'm sorry I told everypony. It was a crappy thing to do,” she extended a hoof. “Friends?”
“Forever!” Applejack untangled her hoof from an IV, and shook. “But that being said, ah think y'all should know what's goin’ on and all… although it'll kill me to say it.” A few of the girls cringed at the word “kill”. Applejack opened we mouth to speak, but then narrowed her eyes. “Hey,” she asked. “Where's Pinkie?”
“Oh yeah, funny story,” Rarity spoke up. “When she saw… ahem, when it happened, she immediately became sick. She was throwing up buckets by the time we arrived.” Rarity’s muzzle scrunched in the memory. She turned to Applejack walked right up next to the bed, stared into her eyes, and took her hoof. Seconds passed, as they shared a moment alone in the crowded room. The moment broke when all the emotions caught up with Rarity, and she began to bawl. “Applejack,” she said through the tears. She fell over, and rested her head on Applejack’s bosom, letting her tears soak the farmer’s orange coat.
“Rare, ah need to tell ya’ somethin’, and ah need to tell you it right now. And ah Don't care if everypony in all of Equestria hears it, because ah need to tell ya'. I need to tell ya' in case somethin’ like this happens again, and ah… and ah ain't so lucky the second time.”
“APPLRJACK!” Rarity yelled, lifting her head up rapidly, and making the other girls jump. “DON'T SAY THAT!”
“Ah have to say that, because it's possible! Ah have to say that because if ah don't, ah’ll convince myself that ah don't need to tell you!” Applejack swallowed hard and gazed into Rarity’s stern eyes. Applejack sighed, and gave a quick glance to all her surrounding friends; who, while unknown to Applejack, definitely cared about what was making her act so melancholy the past month, were happier to see her alive.
“Okay… but after, I want to tell you something too, not because I'm afraid you'll…. But because I think you need to know.”
Applejack’s broken heart fluttered, hoping deep, deep down that they were going to admit the same thing. “When ah had the attack, ah did a lot of thinkin’ about what ah've been actin’ like this last month. And… there's there's a reason ah've been that way. And ah’ve been,” she struggled to get the words out, emotions clogging her throat like a cork on a bottle. “Ah’ve been lieing to y'all, but I think y'all already know that. Ah went to the graveyard because ah was feelin’ sad, ah was cryin’ on the hill because of somethin' more than just a bad day. And ah was feelin' hurt, Twi. Ah was. Ah was because ah fell in love with ya’, Rarity. Ah fell in love with ya’ a year ago, and ah’d lost all hope. Ah'd always hoped that maybe, just maybe you'd felt the same way ah did, but… but then reality caught up to me. Ah saw the truth, and the truth hurt. And ah thought that in order for me to be honest with myself, ah had to lie to y'all. Ah see ah was wrong now, ah think.” Applejack finally gave herself the gut to look Rarity in the eye. “So, um, that's what ah have to say about that. Just don't, uh, think too lowly of me now, will ya’? Ah’ve come to terms with the facts, and ah've moved on, it just took some tears is all.”
Beep.
Beep.
Beep.
Applejack's heart sank as the silence destroyed her. She felt the heat from the eyes of her friends burn her face. They were judging her, and she knew that. “Ahem,” Rarity cleared her throat, announcing that she had finished pondering Applejack’s speech. “Would you girls mind if we could talk… alone? For a bit?”
“I guess we should tell Pinkie you're okay, anyway,” Fluttershy mumbled as they left the room, and closed the door behind them.
“Scootch over,” Rarity commanded, motioning towards the bed. Applejack obliged, making as much room as she could available on the small hospital bed, making sure to keep all and any IVs and wires from being laid upon, admittedly, the nerves of the entire situation left her trembling, and slowed the process down. Rarity took her place next to Applejack, and after another long beat said, “So, only a year, hm?”
Applejack blushed, . “Ah, um, well,” she stuttered.
Rarity shushed, “It's okay, take your time, don't get worked up.”
Applejack slowly inhaled, exhaled, then spoke. “Kinda. Ah-ah had a crush in school when we were fillies, and ah think you knew that, but it went away after… after the whole school dance thing.”
“Applejack,” Rarity stared deeply into Applejack's emerald eyes. “There's not a day in my life that goes by that I don't feel awful for what I did, you know that, don't you?”
A lump formed in Applejack’s throat. “Yeah, ah know. Even though you didn't do nothin’. Your bully friends did.”
Rarity turned her head to stare at the bright hospital light that burnt above their heads. “That's not true. I could have told them to stop, I could have helped you up, I could have wiped your tears; but I didn't. I was a terrible pony, and I hate myself for it! I let my ‘friends’ just push and bully you, let them tear you apart just because you weren't afraid to be who you were! You weren't afraid to be honest! But I was. I was afraid to tell them to stop, that I hated to see you hurt, and I hated the way they bullied you. And… and I am afraid to be honest now.” Rarity returned her gaze back to Applejack. “Applejack, I-I think I’m in love with you too.”
For a brief moment, Applejack’s heart stopped burning.
“Rarity, don’t pity me just ‘cuz ah almost died,” Applejack was nudged in the ribs for saying the ‘d-word’.
“I, am not pitying you. It’s just that we’ve been spending a lot of time together recently, and I couldn’t help but feel like I wanted more than just us going to the spa, or you helping judge a fashion show. At first I thought it was just me telling myself that I wanted to be a better friend, and make up for what I did, but after we went to Manehattan to help Coco, something just clicked. The night we spent there I couldn’t sleep. This… feeling that came over me just refused to let me have my (well deserved and well needed) beauty sleep. Deep down, I knew what it was, but I refused to think it was anything other than a phase, or a heat. I’d only been attracted to stalions my entire life, so why now?” Rarity paused, trying to read Applejack’s face. When she couldn’t, she continued, “But it stayed. The next day, then the next, then the next. And out of nowhere, I’d fallen in love. After it had been officially one week, I looked myself in the mirror, and owned up to it. Ever since then, and until today, I’ve kept it secret.”
Applejack was still unsure. It all seemed too perfect. “Why? Why after you knew ah was into mares?”
Rarity bit her lip. “I was afraid the bullies from way back when had forced it out of you. That, and I was nervous I’d ruin the perfect little friendship we’ve kindred over the many years.” Rarity snuggled her entire body up next to Applejack’s, causing a blush to form on the earth pony’s cheeks. “But, even if it did, I should have told you. If I had lost you today, I-I wouldn’t know what I’d do with myself.”
“Hey now, Rare,” Applejack let herself get more comfortable (as comfortable as the IVs allowed her to) position, letting her entire right side gently touch Rarity’s coat. “Don't go sayin’ stuff that.” She winked, but wasn't sure Rarity got the joke. “So, um, in that case… will you, uh, be my,” despite being confident of the answer, she still had to force the words out. “Will you be my Very Special Somepony?”
Rarity giggled. “Yes, yes I think I will my darling.”
Applejack smiled in response. “My darling, eh? Now ain’t that a promotion?” With another giggle, Rarity planted a kiss on Applejack’s forehead. “Hey now, kissin’ in bed? At least take me to dinner first.”
“Are you kidding me? After seeing how the last time we ate out went, I think you’ll just come over to the boutique, thank you very much!”
Applejack smiled, a smile of true, pure joy. “Ah love ya’ Rarity.
“I love you too,” the unicorn replied. “But alas, I think the visiting hours are ending soon, and I’m sure the other girls would like to say goodnight. Not to mention, your family will probably be here soon.” She stood, and Applejack longed for the ability to call Rarity back and continue their conversation; talk about what their future could hold! “I assume you’d rather wait until we tell the news to the other girls?”
“If ya’ don’t mind. At least not yet, that is.”
Rarity opened the hospital room door, gave one last glance to her lover, blew a kiss, then disappeared from Applejack’s view behind a corner. And that night, after visiting hours were over and the lights were turned off for the night, that cold, solitary, somber bed, felt just a little bit warmer; and thus ended the tears of Applejack, for a long, long time.
