The Story Of The Landlady
There was a fuschia alicorn sitting in a cozy chair, staring into the fireplace, then the audience
“Oh, didn´t see you there“ she sighed “It´s SO close to nightmare night, so I´d thought I´d do something special, so I´ll tell you what“
she repositioned the hoof chair and faced the audience
“I´ll tell you an old story, one that is very old, and it´s a scary and creepy one, so be ready“
Twilight Sparkle had traveled down from Canterlot on the slow afternoon train, with a change at Ponyville on the way, and by the time she got to Manehatton it was about nine o’clock in the evening and the moon was coming up out of a clear starry sky over the houses opposite the station entrance. But the air was deadly cold and the wind was like a flat blade of ice on her cheeks.
“Excuse me,” she said, “but is there a fairly cheap hotel not too far away from here?”
“Try The Manehattan Motel,” the porter answered, pointing down the road. “They might take you in. It’s about a quarter of a mile along on the other side.”
Twilight thanked him and picked up her suitcase and set out to walk the quarter-mile to The Manehattan Motel. She had never been to Manehattan before. She didn’t know anyone who lived there. But Mr.Fancy Pants at the Head Office in Canterlot had told her it was a splendid city. “Find your own lodgings,” he had said, “and then go along and report to the Branch Manager as soon as you’ve got yourself settled.” Twilight was eighteen years old. She was wearing a new navy-blue overcoat, and she was feeling fine. She walked briskly down the street.She was trying to do everything briskly these days. Briskness, she had decided, was the one common characteristic of all successful business ponies. The big shots up at Head Office were absolutely fantastically brisk all the time. They were amazing. There were no shops on this wide street that she was walking along, only a line of tall houses on each side, all them identical. They had porches and pillars and four or five steps going up to their front doors, and it was obvious that once upon a time they had been very swanky residences. But now, even in the darkness, she could see that the paint was peeling from the woodwork on their doors and windows, and that the handsome white façades were cracked and blotchy from neglect. Suddenly, in a downstairs window that was brilliantly illuminated by a street-lamp not six yards away, Twilight caught sight of a printed notice propped up against the glass in one of the upper panes. It said ” BED AND BREAKFAST”.There was a vase of yellow chrysanthemums, tall and beautiful, standing just underneath the notice. She stopped walking. She moved a bit closer. Green curtains (some sort of velvety material) were hanging down on either side of the window. The chrysanthemums looked wonderful beside them. She went right up and peered through the glass into the room, and the first thing she saw was a bright fire burning in the hearth. The room itself, so far as she could see in the half-darkness, was filled with pleasant furniture. There was a baby-grand piano and a big sofa and several plump armchairs, and in one corner she spotted a small alligator in a cage. Animals were usually a good sign in a place like this, Twilight told herself; and all in all, it looked to her as though it would be a pretty decent house to stay in. Certainly it would be more comfortable than The Manehattan Motel. On the other hoof, a pub would be more congenial than a boarding-house. There would be cidar and books to read in the evenings, and lots of people to talk to, and it would probably be a good bit cheaper, too. She had stayed a couple of nights in a Motel once before and she had liked it. She had never stayed in any boarding-houses, and, to be perfectly honest, she was a tiny bit frightened of them. The name itself conjured up images of watery cabbage, rapacious landladies, and a powerful smell of quesadillas in the living-room. After dithering about like this in the cold for two or three minutes, Twilight decided that she would walk on and take a look at The Manehattan Motel before making up her mind. She turned to go. And now a queer thing happened to her. She was in the act of stepping back and turning away from the window when all at once her eye was caught and held in the most peculiar manner by the small notice that was there. ”BED AND BREAKFAST”, it said.BED AND BREAKFAST, BED AND BREAKFAST, BED AND BREAKFAST. Each word was like a large black eye staring at her through the glass, holding her, compelling her, forcing her to stay where she was and not to walk away from that house, and the next thing she knew, she was actually moving across from the window to the front door of the house, climbing the steps that led up to it, and reaching for the bell.She pressed the bell. Far away in a back room she heard it ringing, and then at once – it must have been at once because she hadn’t even had time to take her hoof from the bell-button – the door swung open and a mare was standing there. Normally you ring the bell and you have at least a half-minute’s wait before the door opens. But this girl was a like a jack-in-the-box. She pressed the bell – and out she popped! It made her jump. She was about twenty or eighteen years old, and the moment she saw her, she gave her a warm and happy smile.
“Please come in,” she said cheerfully.
She stepped aside, holding the door wide open, and Twilight found herself automatically starting forward into the house. The compulsion or, more accurately, the desire to follow after her into that house was extraordinarily strong.
“I saw the notice in the window,” she said, holding herself back.
“Yeah, I know.”
“I was wondering about a room.”
“It's all ready for you,” she said. She had a young pink coat and very bouncy blue eyes.
“I was on my way to The Manehattan Motel,” Twilight told her. “But the notice in your window just happened to catch my eye.”
the pink pony said, “why don't you come in out of the cold?”
“How much do you charge?”
“Five or six bits a night, including breakfast.”
It was fantastically cheap. It was less than half of what she had been willing to pay.
“If it´s too much,” she added, “Then maybe I can reduce it just a tiny bit. Do you want waffles for breakfast? waffles are kinda expensive at the moment. It´d be one bit less if you don´t want the the waffles.”
“Five or six bits is fine,” she answered. “I should like very much to stay here.”
The pony smiled “I KNEW you would. Please come in.”
She seemed terribly nice. She looked exactly like one’s best schoolfriend welcoming one into the house to stay for the hearth´s warming holidays. Twilight took off her coat, and stepped over the threshold.
“Just hang it there,” Pinkie said.
There were no other hats or coats in the hall. There were no umbrellas, no walkingsticks – nothing.
“We have it all to ourselves,” she said, smiling at her over her shoulder as she led the way upstairs.
”Ya see, it isn´t very often I to take a visitor into my little shack.” The mare is slightly dotty, Twilight told herself. But at five or six bits a night, who gives a care about that?
“I should've thought you’d be simply swamped with applicants,” she said politely.
“Oh, of COURSE. But the problem is that I don´t let just ANYPONY into my house – if you see what I mean.”
“Ah, yes.”
“But I’m always ready. Everything is ready in this house all the time just in case that an acceptable young pony will come along. And it´s fun, my friend, a lot of fun when now and again I open the door and I see somepony standing there who´s exactly right.”
She was half-way up the stairs, and she paused with one hoof on the stair, turning her head and smiling down at her.
“Like you,” she added.
And her blue eyes traveled slowly all the way down the length of Twilights' body, to her feet, and then up again. On the first-floor landing she said to her:
“This floor is mine.” They climbed up a second flight.
“And this one is all yours,” she said. “Here’s your room, I hope you’ll like it.”
She took her into a small but charming front bedroom, switching on the light as they went in.
“The sun comes right in the window, Miss Twinkle. It´s Miss Twinkle, isn’t it?”
“No,” she said. “It’s Sparkle.”
“Miss Sparkle. How fun.Speaking of which, I´m Pinkie.I’ve put a waterbottle between the sheets to air them out, Miss Sparkle. It’s really comfy to have a hot water-bottle in a weird bed with clean sheets, don’t you think? And you can light the gas fire at any time if you feel a teensy bit chilly.”
“Thank you,” Twilight said. “Thank you ever so much.” She noticed that the bedspread had been taken off the bed, and that the bedclothes had been neatly turned back on one side, all ready for someone to get in.
“I’m so glad you came,” she said, looking earnestly into her face. “I was beginning to get worried.”
“That’s all right,” Twilight answered brightly. “You mustn’t worry about me.”
She put her suitcase on the chair and started to open it.
“And what about dinner? asked Pinkie ”Did ya manage to get anything to eat before you came here?”
“I’m not a bit hungry, thank you,” she said. “I think I’ll just go to bed as soon as possible because tomorrow I’ve got to get up rather early and report to the office.”
“Okie Dokie Lokie, then. I’ll leave you now so that you can unpack. But before you go to bed, would ya please pop into the sitting-room on the ground floor and sign the book? Everypony has to do that because it’s the law of the land, and we don’t want to go breaking any laws, do we?” She gave her a little wave of the hoof and went quickly out of the room and closed the door. Now, the fact that his landlady appeared to be slightly off her rocker didn’t worry Twilight in the least. After all, she was not only harmless – there was no question about that – but she was also quite obviously a kind and generous soul. She guessed that she had probably lost a friend in the war, or something like that, and had never got over it. So a few minutes later, after unpacking her suitcase and washing her hoofs, she trotted downstairs to the ground floor and entered the living-room. Her landlady wasn’t there, but the fire was glowing in the hearth. The room was wonderfully warm and cozy. I’m a lucky pony she thought, rubbing her hoofs. This is a bit of all right. She found the guest-book lying open on the piano, so she took out her pen and wrote down her name and address. There were six other entries above hers on the page, and, as one always does with guest-books, she started to read them. One was a Rarity from Ponyville.Another was a Rainbow Dash from Ponyville, the third was an Applejack from Ponyville as well, the fourth was someone named Spike, again was from Ponyville, and so were the next ones, the fifth and sixth were two ponies named Fluttershy and Discord, but their names were circled together, and so were Applejack and Spike, the two pairs must have come as couples.
”That’s funny,” she thought suddenly.
Rarity Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Spike, Fluttershy. and Discord.It rings a bell. Now, where on earth had she heard those names before? Were they famous? No. Was it one of her old teacher; Princess Celestia´s associates perhaps? or friends of her father’s? No, no, it wasn’t any of those. “Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Spike, Fluttershy, and Discord?” she said aloud, searching her memory.
“Really fun Ponies” a voice behind her answered, and she turned and saw Pinkie sailing into the room with a large silver tea-tray balancing on her back, for some strange reason, her mane was wasn´t poofy like before, but Twilight didn´t mind.
“They sound somehow familiar,” she said.
“Really? How interesting.”
“I’m almost positive I’ve heard those names before somewhere. Isn’t that queer? Maybe it was in the newspapers. They weren’t famous in any way, were they? I mean famous for royalty or movie stars or something like that?”
“Famous,” she said, setting the tea-tray down on the low table in front of the sofa. “Oh no, I don’t think they were famous. But they were pretty special all of them, I can promise you that. They were kind, generous, honest, and loyal, just exactly like you.”
Once more, Twilight glanced down at the book. “Look here,” she said, noticing the dates. “This last entry is over two years old.”
“It is?” asked Pinkie “Yes, indeed Pinkie-”
”Actually, sometimes I prefer Pinkimena, it´s my FULL first name.
”Right...and the others are nearly a year before that – more than three years year apart,...thirty-six YEARS ago”
“Wowie,” she said, shaking her head and heaving a dainty little sigh. “I never thought this day would come, I´ll have to throw a party later. How time does fly away from us all, doesn’t it, Miss Farkle?”
“It’s SPARKLE,” Twilight said. “S-p-a-r-k-l-e.”
“Oh, THAT´S right!” Pinkimena cried, sitting down on the sofa. “How silly of me. I´m REALLY sorry. In one ear and out the other, that’s me, Miss Sparkle.”
The purple unicorn threw her hooves up in the air exasperatedly “You know something?” Twilight said. ”Something that’s really quite extraordinary about all this?”
“No, I don’t,” Pinkiemena said shrugging
“Well, you see – all of these names, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Spike, Fluttershy, Discord I not only seem to remember each one of them separately, so to speak, but somehow or other, in some peculiar way, they all appear to be sort of connected together as well. As though they were both famous for the same sort of thing, if you see what I mean – like … like Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, for example, or Cadence and my brother Shinning armor.”
“How funny,” Pinkamena said. “But come over here now and sit down beside me on the sofa, and I’ll give you a nice cup of tea and a ginger biscuit before ya go to bed.” the pink pony said with a smile
“You really shouldn’t bother,” Twilight said. “I didn’t mean you to do anything like that.” She stood by the piano, watching her as she fussed about with the cups and saucers. “I’m almost positive it was in the newspapers I saw them,” Twilight said. “I’ll think of it in a second. I’m sure I will.”
There is nothing more tantalizing than a thing like this which lingers just outside the borders of one’s memory.She hated to give up. “Now wait a minute,” she said. “Wait just a minute. Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Spike, Fluttershy, and Discord ...weren't those the names of a group of friends that live in Ponyville? and then all of a sudden ...”
“Milk?” Pinkie said. “And sugar?”
“Yes, please. ”
“All of them from Ponyville?” said Pinkie. “Oh no, that can’t be right because my Dashie was from Cloudsdale. Come on over and sit next to the warm fire. Come on. Your tea’s all ready for you.” She patted the empty place beside her on the sofa, and she sat there smiling at Twilight and waiting for her to come over. She crossed the room slowly and sat down on the edge of the sofa. She placed her teacup on the table in front of her. “There we go,” she said. “How nice and cozy this is, isn’t it?” Twilight started sipping her tea. She did the same. For half a minute or so, neither of them spoke. But Twilight knew that she was looking at her. Her body was half-turned towards her, and she could feel her eyes resting on her, watching her over the rim of her teacup. Now and again, she caught a whiff of a peculiar smell that seemed to emanate directly from her person. It was not in the least unpleasant, and it reminded her of – well, she wasn’t quite sure what it reminded her of. Frosting? cake? Or was it rubber of a balloon? “Rarity was a great one for her tea,” she said at length. “Never in my life have I seen anypony drink as much tea as dear, sweet Rarity.” “I guess she left fairly recently,” Twilight said. She was still puzzling her head about the eight names. She was positive now that she had seen them in the newspapers, in the headlines.
“Left?” Pinkamena said, arching her eyes. “But she never left. She’s still here. The others are also here. They’re on the third floor, all of them together.” Twilight set down her cup slowly on the table and stared at her landlady. She smiled back at her, and then she put out one of her pink hooves and patted her comfortingly on the arm. “How old are you ?” she asked. “Eighteen.” “Eighteen!” the pink pony cried. “Oh, it’s the perfect age! Applejack was also eighteen. and her teeth were NOT as white as yours. You have GREAT teeth, Miss Sparkle, did you know that?” “They’re not as good as they look,” Twilight said. “They’ve got simply masses of fillings in them at the back.”
“Rarity, of course, was a little older,” she said, ignoring the unicorn´s remark. “she was actually twenty. And yet I never would have guessed it if she hadn’t told me, never in my whole life. There wasn’t a blemish on her body.”
“A what?” Twilight asked.
“her coat was just like a baby’s.” There was a pause. Twilight picked up her teacup and took another sip of her tea, then she set it down again gently in its saucer.She waited for her to say something else, but she seemed to have lapsed into another of her silences. She sat there staring straight ahead of her into the far corner of the room, biting her lower lip. “That alligator,” she said at last. “You know something? It had me completely fooled when I first saw it through the window from the street. I could have sworn it was alive.”
“Not anymore.” sighed Pinkamena
“It’s really clever the way it’s been done,” he said. “It doesn’t look in the least bit dead. Who did it?”
“I did.”
“You did?”
“Of course,” she said. Twilight put out a hoof and touched it gently on the top of its back. This green alligator was perfectly preserved.
“Gosh,” Twilight said. “How absolutely fascinating.” she turned away from the alligator and stared with deep admiration at the pony beside her on the sofa. “It must be most awfully difficult to do a thing like that.”
“Not really,” she said. “I stuffed my little Gummy myself when he passed away because I´d miss him too much. Want another cup of tea?”
“No, thank you,” Twilight said. The tea tasted faintly of bitter almonds, and she didn’t much care for it.
“You did sign the book, right?” asked Pinkamena “Oh, yes.”
“GREAT. Because later on, if I forget what you´re name is, then I can always come down here and look it up. I still do that almost every day with the others”
Twilight then interrupted ”Excuse my asking, but haven’t there been any other guests here except them in the last two or three years?” Holding her teacup high in one hoof, inclining her head slightly to the left, she looked at her out of the corners of her eyes and gave her another smile. “No,” she said. ‘Only you”
Suddenly, Twilight felt very dizzy, and then that´s when it hit her
”The eight of them-I remember”
Twilight stood for a while, then she couldn´t, Pinkie held her and smiled
“Off to bed Twiliy “
Pinkie brought her upstairs and helped her lie on the bed, but Twilight didn´t stay down for long, she went to the window and opened
“AIR “ she gasped, a few seconds later, she collapsed, Pinkimena held up her body, and lied her on the bed, she then went to the room next to Twilights, it was filled with six figures,
“Hi guys “ she said, nopony moved
“Hi Dash, still reading daring doo? That´s SO you, but maybe you should take a break“ Pinkie removed the book from her hooves, the cyan pegasus didn´t move, none of them did
“Fluttershy, you´re too quiet, Discord, talk some sense into her “
Nothing
“You´re right, She can do WHATEVER she wants “
The pink pony grabbed a silver cart “Welp, I´ll tell you all a bedtime story later, but tonight you have a new FRIEND, be right back “ Pinkimena turned off the lights and closed the door, she went to Twilight´s room and checked her pulse
“Perfect “ she thought, she took a tray off the cart, it had several long, sharp, and piercing tools, Pinkimena put on some gloves and grabbed a scalpel.
“And so, Twilight never left the house that night, she was smart but her thoughts of pinkie being harmless were incorrect, who knew that cyanide tasted like bitters almonds? and that ends our story for tonight, what is the moral of the story you may ask?, easy, don´t take tea from ponies who are slightly off their rockets, and who knows?Maybe YOU´LL come visit me next“ the fuschia pony took off a mask, show a pink face with a flat mane and bouncy blue eyes, she chuckled
“I´m just kidding “
the pony used her magic to reveal a dark red demon with black hair, orange eyes, and bat wings, she flashed her fangs with a menacing smile at the audience,
“Happy Nightmare Night “
