It’s Tuesday morning. I’m lost and stunned, I still have trouble believing what’s happening right now. Everypony is here, I don’t know how it started but I find it hard to accept reality. I always thought I was the most extreme pony of all, that I was incapable of being intimidated, that I was not afraid of anything. But today I’m more terrified than ever. I think it’s time.
It was Hearth’s Warming Eve; I remember it well. I went to her parents’ house, because she wanted to celebrate the holidays with them. Zephyr Breeze opened the door for me, and instead of flirting with me as usual, he held respect, kept quiet, and merely guided me. We went upstairs and reached the one that had been his room for fifteen years. When Zephyr opened the door, there she was: surrounded by her parents, lying on the bed and splinting her right hind leg.
“Hello Rainbow Dash. It’s good to see you, I thought you wouldn’t come considering we’ve always had a party at Twilight’s Castle.”
“No, they’ll be fine without me for a while. Besides, what kind of pony would I be if I didn’t come to visit my best friend?”
She laughed a little. I couldn’t help but notice the splint on her hoof.
“What happened?”
“It was an accident at work. While I filled the feeders for my birds, I slipped and fell from a tree. Don’t worry, the doctor said I’ll get back very soon.”
“...I’m glad.”
We stayed to chat and dine for an hour. I had to return with the others, so it was a quick stay. Zephyr walked with me to the door, and just before I left he told me a few words.
“Thanks for coming.”
“No problem.”
“No, seriously, you don’t know how much I appreciate you. After all that has happened, I’m confident that you can take your time to come here. I bet that after this you two will continue to live many adventures saving Equestria.”
He smiled, “I promise you the next meeting will be at her house.”
“I hope so.”
I arrived at the hospital, after going two floors up I finally found it. She was sitting in one of the benches near the windows. She saw me and immediately got up, ran and gave me a hug. It was surprising, but I didn’t mind and I gave it back.
“I'm glad you have come. I didn’t know who else to turn to.”
“Couldn’t the others come?”
“No, I tried to contact them but no one answered. I’m just glad you made it, I’m sure it'll be fun regardless.”
“Well, Fluttershy...”
She was disappointed and soon her gaze repressed me.
“You too?”
“I can’t stay; this was supposed to be a quick visit. I’ve been very busy lately–”
“It’s always you, it’s always about you!”
“Fluttershy, calm down. You’re going to draw attention.”
“It’s always the Wonderbolts!”
“It’s not that this time, it’s a lot more personal!”
We were silent for a few minutes and she gave me the word.
“My parents’ house was flooded and while they were draining it, my mother slipped and injured all the left part of her body.”
I rubbed my head, “Ribs, paws, hip, everything. My dad has been trying to make money so I can pay for his medications and I’ve been staying home helping them. I’ve been absent for training for the last couple of months.”
She understood, but she did not seem to accept it.
“I’m sorry I can’t stay longer,” I finally spoke. “But it’s important.”
“I understand, but... I’ve always been there for you.”
“Why did you call me for anyway?”
“...It’s Zephyr.”
“What happened? Was he cut with the role of your aesthetic?”
Now I realize that was not the right thing to say at the time.
“He’s in operation... He had a rise of sugar so strong and elevated that it has affected almost all his organs. They had to open his whole body to reduce pressure: legs, chest, back, even opened the crotch. My parents are now paying for his transfusion.”
Everything fell like a bucket of cold water.
“All because he stopped working out for a couple of days. He paid the price for believing he was invincible. I know you and I don’t want you to go through the same thing. I need someone to support me right now.”
I wondered if I had been a bad pony during all our friendship.
We were sitting on a bench in Ponyville’s central park eating ice cream, when she talked about something that was passing through my mind.
“Did you get the invitation to the Summer Festival?”
I smirked, “Yeah. Princess Celestia will come to celebrate with the whole town. She wants me to take over the music. Can you believe it?”
She looked very excited, more than usual considering how reserved she is, “I have a very important job for the Festival.”
“Yes, sooooooooooooooooooooooo exciting.”
“...You don’t sound very excited. Did you not receive an invitation?”
“Yes, but... I have to take care of the weather... as usual.”
“Maintaining the weather is important, Rainbow Dash. In fact, it’s more priority than what I have.”
“But I always do that. I want to do something different, I know they'll give tickets to see the Wonderbolts in the next gala and I really, really want to go.”
“Always with your Wonderbolts.”
“Well, if you want we can talk about the rumors we heard.”
“What rumors?”
“Someone new is moving.”
“That’s great! How do you think the new neighbor would look like?”
“I just hope it’s not a bookworm. That would be embarrassing,” I said nonchalantly.
“Come on, don’t be so hard. I hope they likes animals, we would have a new friend to see the migration of butterflies.”
“Don’t say that, Fluttershy, we don’t want to make the experience weird.”
We laughed a little.
“Can you imagine the welcome party Pinkie Pie will give them?”
“More than likely she'll fill their house with confetti, balloons and give them a spicy fruit punch.”
“Don’t make fun of them, Dash. You did the same when you moved, remember?”
“Yes. But I had to move.”
She was silent. In fact, she looked surprised. I can’t be the only one who saw this. And thanks to Celestia, I wasn’t.
"I mean, if you think about it, we really don’t have anything in common, aside that we’re pegasus and we went to the same school. I mean, you take care of animals, I’m an athlete. You’re timid and I’m 20% cooler.”
"You're right... we are so different. Sometimes... sometimes I can’t believe I’m your friend.”
It broke my heart to hear that. She stared at the floor for a few moments, slightly off. Then she lifted her head and looked at me.
"But I like the fact that we are different, because that makes all our meetings intriguing. That’s why I’m thrilled that there will be a new neighbor in this place. I want to know them, I want to know how they are... and I want you to be there with me.”
We didn’t speak, but with a smile it was enough for her to understand what she meant.
"In the library at seven o’clock?”
“This is the best party in the world!” I raised my voice because of the noise and the hilarious lights, Pinkie Pie was at my side. “Thank you Pinkie!”
“No problem! All for a friend! Especially because you paid for all this! Now, if you excuse me, I have to make sure the guests don’t break things or put sauce in the pool!”
Pinkie Pie withdrew immediately. It was ironic and fun to see how she tried to make others laugh while avoiding overdoing them. At that moment Fluttershy came, she looked a little nervous. She had never liked crowded places.
“Rainbow Dash! Can we go somewhere quieter?!”
I nodded. We retired to the rented building. Inside, the noise wasn’t so loud and the music and the screams of the other ponies weren’t heard. Calmly, she began to speak.
“I thought it would be a private party. Just the two of us, with nopony else.”
“Hey, you wanted the best of the best and I gave it to you. Besides, it seems your brother is enjoying it more than we do.” I said with a grin.
“It doesn’t matter. Who are those ponies?”
“They are your friends... our friends.”
“I don’t know anyone. You know how hard it’s for me to socialize!” She said flustered, “You can’t just have half of Ponyville at the party just so you can take me with somepony else.”
“I thought you wanted to make new friends!”
“But not like this!” Outrage, that what was in her eyes. “The only one I know is Pinkie Pie, and that’s because she keeps harassing me in front of my house ever since I got here! The story repeats itself, you get along with everypony and I barely can go to the store for a bag of seeds.”
We were silent as much as can be. I was still listening to the background music and I guess I heard Zephyr shouting.
“Seriously... you appeal to everypony and you look so great in front of others that... sometimes I can’t believe I’m your friend.”
“Fluttershy, don’t say that!” She reacted in a way she had seldom seen. “You know me well!”
“But you don’t know me!”
"What are you talking about?!” I wanted to understand what he meant. Was she nervous that she had been here alone for so long or that, now that I was here with her, we would distance ourselves? I continued.
“Fluttershy, I’ve been your best friend since I was seven. Even though you’re four years older than me, you didn’t like being with ponies of your age, you just felt comfortable next to me. The only reason I finished school was because you lent me your old notes. I know you as well as you know me.” I paused. “I thought if I was away from you there would be no problem and we would both continue our lives separately because I thought we could be on our own.”
She let out a small tear.
“But it’s not like that, I was wrong. Now I’ve realized that the only way I can continue with my life is with you at my side. We were right together and we were wrong together.”
I paused again. “I must be honest with you... the only reason I moved was to be with you.”
She ran and hugged me tightly. I continued. “As long as you are with me, nothing will happen to you.”
“I don’t know what I was thinking, Mom. It’s like I don’t know her anymore.”
“Well Rainbow, we all take separate paths, we all have to find our purpose.”
“But she can’t be alone, she doesn’t even have another friend besides me.”
“Oh, come on, sweetie, we can all have many friends. And even those we had in the past, in one way or another, will be part of us.”
“I don’t know. Now everything has a different flavor. I’m not excited about school anymore; my other friends do everything they can to make me understand but it doesn’t work. Even the Wonderbolts shows bore me. It’s as if the world had lost its color.”
“...Maybe if we asked for a meeting in her new home, would that comfort you?”
“...I guess so.”
“Great! Now, who’s the bestest friend of best friends in the world?”
“Mom!” She tickled me, I burst into laughter.
“No Fluttershy! You can’t move!”
“It's a new opportunity, Rainbow Dash!” She had her suitcases ready at the door of her old home. “There are a lot of animals out there that could help me in my studies. It’ll be a new adventure for me.”
“But what happened to ours?!” I tried to stop her. “I thought we’d be together forever!”
“Life always has other plans for each.”
“But if you’re there, maybe you’ll never come back.”
“And if I stay, who will I be?” She kept her decision. “Rainbow Dash, this is very important to me. I would appreciate your support.”
“But you don’t know how to take care of you alone!”
“Is that it?!” She paused and looked me straight in the eye. “Oh, I get it... with the great and amazing Rainbow Dash, who’s going to notice the poor, helpless, timid Fluttershy?”
“I didn’t mean that.”
“Then what? That I can’t survive without you? That I need a younger girl to take care of me all the time? Don’t treat me like a baby. My school life was a hell with you. And this time I want to get away from my past as much as possible, but keep in touch with part of it. Besides, what do you have to worry about? You were always sociable, I’m just one of your many friends and you can make more.”
“But...” It was my last chance to convince her. “I’m your best friend, I’m your only friend!”
She looked into my eyes one last time.
“Well... maybe it’s time to make new ones, right?”
I had lost everything. “Look Rainbow Dash, you’ll always be part of me, but there’s nothing for me here. I’ve to find my own way.”
She grabbed her suitcases and left.
I couldn’t go to her parents’ house for the rest of the week. I had problems with my parents to deal with. As Zephyr promised, I went to her house the following week. It was Monday morning; ten o’clock. I took many of her favorite things: Many cucumber and straw sandwiches, green tea, binoculars and a book with animal species. I planned to spend a whole day with her, a week if possible. I opened the door and there I ran into Zephyr, as well as her parents, but there were no signs of Fluttershy. Who would say that one learns so much from life, yet life still had one last lesson to give me.
“Where’s Fluttershy?”
Zephyr approached me and looked directly at me. “Rainbow Dash,” he said as he rested his hooves on my shoulders. “You have to be strong...”
It turns out that during the week I was away, they took Fluttershy to the hospital so they could donate platelets and heal her faster. It was supposed to be only a matter of hours before she was well. However, something happened that wasn’t planned. Her wound became infected and began to damage her body too soon. Because of this, Zephyr and another pony decided to donate platelets as soon as possible to avoid something more serious. Somehow, the infection reached her brain, forming a cyst and causing her a stroke. Thanks to her brother and the donor, they managed to save her. Three days later, at four in the morning, she had another stroke. She didn’t make it this time. The only good thing was that everything happened so fast that she didn’t feel anything, she didn’t suffer.
The rest of the day I couldn’t think of anything else. Around six in the afternoon I prepared to go to the building where they were making the arrangements. The truth is that I didn’t know how to react, I felt that the world stopped making sense to me.
“Rainbow Dash?”
They got me out of my thoughts. It was Zephyr. Quieter, less restless, even more arranged. He looked good for the occasion.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “It is just that–”
“It’s okay. I understand.”
He lifted me from the chair outside the building and led me inside. Turn left, upstairs, turn right and then another turn left. Door number three.
“We’ll wait for you,” he came in and dropped me off at the entrance.
I try to keep remembering. I’ve to stand firm for this moment, but... I’m really screwed. On the one hoof, I want to forget her, but for another I know that she’s the only pony in the world that can make me happy now. And when I order and rearrange and turn my head and look for the moment when those first signs of problems occurred, I want to know what happened. But the further back I go in my memories, the memories seem more diffused and confusing and I find it increasingly difficult to have all the details and to connect the points.
“Hey,” Zephyr came back, I looked at him. “Do you want to come and see her?”
I nodded. Inside the room were all: her parents, Twilight and the others, Tree Hugger, several of our former flight campmates, even the donor was there. She was at the back of the room, right in the center. Zephyr accompanied me to her. I finally saw her. My reaction was sudden.
The lid was open. Everything cooled down, she seemed asleep. But I couldn’t bear to see her like this, inside a cardboard box, having finished her course in this dimension. Not even the fact that Rarity designed her dress made me calm down. I didn’t want to see her like this, so I ran off, left the room again and went directly to the nearest balcony to start crying. I can only say that somepony was dealing with the situation worse than I was: Discord was outside destroying things and shouting ‘NO!’ as hard as he could, then to lie down as several guards took turns and tried to keep him on the ground.
Somepony had to stay and look after her the night before the big day. I offered, they thought I wasn’t the right one because I wasn’t mentally stable for that, but I didn’t care. In the end Zephyr convinced them to leave me alone with her for the rest of the night. Everything felt quiet once they left, only the cleaning crew was left with others who kept vigil the same day in other rooms. I lay down in the sofa on the opposite side where she stood. I slept with the dress I had on that occasion.
I found myself above a world of clouds, which was collapsing before my eyes. It didn’t look like Cloudsdale or any other familiar place. Everything was covered in black clouds and was falling apart. I felt small and didn’t know what to do or if I could do something. I began to cry... until a flash of light appeared and brightened everything.
“Princess Luna?” I asked stammering.
“Yes, Rainbow Dash. It's me,” the princess locked us both in a bubble, to keep the dream from interfering with our conversation.
“What is this place? I know I’m dreaming but... it doesn’t look like something I would dream about.”
“It’s because this a part of your being that you’ve wanted to keep hidden from the rest of the world, what you’ve been neglecting for a long time.”
“...This is for Fluttershy, isn’t it?”
“You tell me.”
I kept quiet as I thought I was going to say. Luna had the patience to wait for me to say something, anything. Finally, I did.
“This was not in my plans. I got used to living with her, I got used to living for her. I couldn’t say goodbye to her; I couldn’t ask for forgiveness to her. Now, what do I do? How can I unaccustomed the custom of her company?”
I couldn’t stand the pain anymore.
“Why did they take her away from me?! Why?! I don’t want to live without her! Take me with you please!”
I hugged her leg, beating the bubble furiously.
“I understand your pain. I had a friend with whom I spent a lot of time. Her name was White Eclipse. We enjoyed reading and going out to explore other extraordinary places. We saw the shooting stars when night fell. Then I was out of here.”
I got up off the ground and wanted to know more about everything. “When Celestia sent you to the Moon?”
“No. I had to leave Equestria for a long time. When I returned, my sister told me that she looked at the moon every night, hoping to see me again, at the same time that she neglected her interpersonal relationships, her family and her health.”
She kept quiet as she watched the realm of clouds fall and explode.
“I lost my friend a year and a half ago.”
“Because of the distance or the cold space between you?” I asked.
“In a similar way... it’s called cancer.”
I took that word by surprise. She took a deep breath.
“I had to give a panegyric at her funeral and that’s difficult. I won’t go into details, but a disease of this magnitude changes your personality and physiology in a matter of time. And when you lose somepony whom you loved because of an illness, like I did, it’s only until they die that you realize that the memory of the disease dominates over theirs. And it’s until after you realize that you’ve forgotten that there was a time when everything was fine before everything went wrong. That there was something before all that helped you to form who you are.”
I lowered my head as the princess put one of her hooves over my shoulder.
“I know it’s difficult to accept, and even when you’re happy with those who are by your side, you’ll cry and long for those who were with you yesterday and now they are gone, but I guarantee that once you see everything she did for you, everything will get better. Take all the time you want.”
I woke up, it was morning. And here we are.
I leave the room to go to the balcony. They’re starting to reach the place. Everyone welcomes me once they go upstairs. This time there is someone more attached to the rest: Princess Celestia. Since Fluttershy was one of the original elements, it makes sense that she’s here. What I don’t expect is what comes next. A couple of guards come in at the end. Once everypony is gathered inside the room, she talks about her future destiny.
“I need two volunteers to accompany me to the cremation room.”
“How?” I ask.
“There must be two ponies present during the cremation to receive the ashes.”
I blinked, “She can’t be cremated. We were all supposed to be buried.”
“Dash,” Twilight intervenes. She looks into my eyes. “That’s what Fluttershy left in her testimony. I know it’s what we all wanted and promised, but we must respect her desire.”
“...Then I offer myself.”
Zephyr comes out of the crowd. “Me too. She’s my family after all. And I owe her a lot.”
The guards close the lid and load the coffin. Princess Celestia is the first to leave the room, followed by the guards and finally Zephyr and myself. Downstairs and at the last door of the lobby is the cremation room. We enter. As the guards light the gigantic oven, Celestia addresses us.
“Do you have any last words to say before we proceed?”
Zephyr approaches the coffin and gives it a pat. “Good trip, sister... I miss you a lot.”
My turn is coming.
"It’s ironic. Most people think I was the cool one, but the truth is that she was more great than me. Many say I saved her, but the truth is... she saved me.”
Emotions broiled around like a rising and falling tide, “I want to believe she knew it before I did. It’s an honor for this pony to be worth knowing me. In the end I think I can say that we both provided happiness to each other. So one day, when my turn comes, I hope Fluttershy is there to answer for me, to help me and teach me to live on the other side.”
***
“Look, it’s the one who can hardly fly!”
She's crying, cheeks red from the exertion of tears. She had fallen quite a ways, just trying to get away from them. But she couldn't.
They're smiling, pointing with their hooves and egging the scene on.
“What’s wrong? Why don’t you go running with your mom?”
I descend, my landing faulty, but my voice stern.
“Hey! Leave her alone!”
They looked between one another, confusion marking their faces as they tried to recognize me.
…
I step forward in front of her, shielding her from their stares. I would protect her. She would… she will be safe.
…
I growl and kick clouds towards them, taunting them with a rapid gust of wind.
“You’d better run away!”
They cried out in shock, having never been stood up to before.
“You’ll pay for this, Rainbow Crash!”
I will take her pain.
“Are you ok?”
I will protect her sorrow.
“I guess so.”
"Don’t listen to them, they’re fools. Get up and be strong. You have to be strong.”
“O-Okay...”
She wiped the moisture clouding her eyes. I puffed out a strand of hair that had been bothering me.
“What’s your name?”
“Flu-Flu-Fluttershy.”
“Sorry, I didn't hear you. Could you repeat it, please?”
“Fluttershy.”
“Fluttershy... I’m Rainbow Dash.”
“Do you want to be my friend?”
“Of course, and don’t worry about them. No matter what, while you’re with me, you’ll have nothing to fear.”
“...Thanks for everything.”
“No… thank you...”
Author's Note
For Chavo,
Thank you for teaching me to love what I do.
Thank you for being there for me.
Thank you for dedicating your life to what you loved until the last moment.
And above all, thank you for being part of my life.
