Griffons, Gamble, Garble, and Gripe

by Comrade Bagel Muffin

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Griffons, Screwball, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1018

Screwball goes to Griffonstone

Screwball has a misadventure in the Griffon lands.

Published 2021-10-03 18:30:00 UTC
Last updated 2021-10-03 18:30:00 UTC

Frenzy of Feathers and Fun

Screwball stepped off of the train onto the platform. It was the end of the line. Up above overlooking the train station and all of the other mountains in the valley stood the split mountain city of Griffonstone. She gazed up in awe at the sight. Her eyes spinning faster and faster as she took in every single detail of the city. She was particularly interested in the Abysmal Abyss it looked like it would be an awesome place to do some sky diving, and wind surfing. "This is going to be so fun." Screwball jumped off the train platform. The propeller on her hat spun at ludicrous speed kept her from touching the ground. She floated up the winding trail that led to the griffon's capital city.

"Wow, griffon cities are dumps." She looked over the shambled town. she had heard from Gabby, that Griffonstone was nothing like Ponyville, and boy was she right. "This place could really use a make over." Screwball pulled a long scroll of paper out of her hat, and unrolled it. It rolled all the way down the mountain and stopped at the train station. She rubbed her chin in thought. "I guess if I move free falling into the Abysmal Abyss to noon I could spend the rest of the morning helping clean up Griffonstone, but that means that I won't be able to get my Yak Scream Theropy done till nightfall, but wait a second, if I put it in with interpretive yodeling I can do both at once. Perfect!" She clapped her hooves together dropping the paper to the ground, and started walking off.

"Hey you! What's the big idea!" Screwball stopped and looked around. A large griffon was walking up to her. "You can't just throw litter wherever you want."

"Litter what are you talking about." Screwball asked.

"This He picked up her absurdly long list. You can't just leave your trash wherever you want." As he was still talking a griffon walked past tossing a crumbled up piece of paper into a pile of crumbled up trash next to to the side walk.

"What about that." She pointed.

"That's a designated dumping zone."

"Okay fair," she sighed. "Normally my stuff just disappears when I stop touching it." She clapped her hooves and the paper began to turn to dust.

"I'm not feeling to good Ms.Screwball." The paper whispered as the last part of it faded away into dust.

"Sorry kid but that's how the cookie crumbles, oh speaking of cookies do you have any here?" Screwball started looking around for anything else that she could have fun with.

"Violation of the conservation of matter and energy, you're being fined for flagrant disregard for Newtonian Law." He grabbed her tail. "What do you have to say for yourself."

"Fight the power!" She threw a pie in his face and by the time he wiped off the banana and whipped cream she was gone. He started running down the street looking for her. Screwball poked her head of the pile of crumbled up papers. "Gabby was right griffons really are a grumpy bunch, aren't they." A griffon tossed a crumbled up wrapper on her walking past as they ate a very tasty looking scone. "Right pony savior complex activate!" She clapped her hooves and the crumbled papers reformed themselves into a scrumped up collage of a giant hamster. "Modern art, it's perfect." She started started doing the same to the other scrumped up "dumping areas" until she found herself near a very big building with a lot or griffons in line. This catching her curiosity she slipped her way past several griffons and into the large building. It was full of tables with griffons playing an assortment of card games. "The arcade!"

"SHhhh!" Every griffon in the hall glared at her.

"Oh yeah sorry." She smiled slipping off and going to the table with the biggest toughest griffons. She sat at a chair that hadn't existed just a few moments ago. "Deal me in." Screwball said.

"We don't play for fun we play for bits, do you have what it takes to pay in." The biggest griffon leaned in and glared at her with his one good eye. She smiled.

"Did I stutter I said deal me in." She dropped a bag of bits on the table. The griffon smiled giving her five cards she looked over her hand before looking back to the griffon. "Got any threes."

"We're play poker not go-fish."

"That's cause you must be part chicken."

"Big talk for a little pony." The griffon glared at her.

"My daddy says I'm perfectly proportioned for a filly my age. Now are we going to talk or are you going to tell me if you have any threes." Screwball returned the glare he spinning eyes moving at a near glacial pace.

"Lucky guess." He gave her a three she smiled, putting three threes with his. "Lucks got nothing to do with it. Got any Queens." The griffon pulled back their feathers ruffled they passed three queens. "I think that means I win." She smiled pulling her loot toward her before the doors to the casino were kicked open.

"Listen up I'm looking for a violator of Newtonian Physics and..."He trailed off.

"Uh-oh." Screwball squeaked before she was tackled to the ground and hoofcuffed to the griffon. He started walking off pulling her fake hoof off. She quickly grabbed her winnings and painted a door on the wall slipping away.

She sat on the train heading back to Equestria writing a letter. Dearest Princess Twilight, Today I learned a very valuable lesson of friendship. You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose you have to let them be strong and pick it themselves. You most faithful Facebook stalker Screwball. P.S. I love what you did with your mane

Twilight read the note before looking up. "Spike, am I allowed to get a cease and desist on one of my godchildren?"