Maybe This Wasn't Such a Good Idea

by Boltstrike58

Rating: teen
Tags: Pinkie Pie (EqG), Equestria Girls, Comedy, Horror, Random, Crossover
Length: 4399

Pennywise the dancing clown searches for food on another Earth, but gets a little bit more than he bargained for.

The Losers Club had managed to defeat It, but they failed to kill It. As It prepares to go into hibernation once again, It decides to find one last meal on a different Earth.
Unfortunately, Its chosen victim is...unique. Pennywise feeds on fear, but Pinkie Pie doesn't know the meaning of the word.
(A random one-shot I wrote to celebrate Halloween. Inspired by the movie, but also incorporates elements from the book)

Now with a reading!

Published 2017-10-25 03:20:07 UTC
Last updated 2017-10-25 03:20:07 UTC

Maybe This Wasn't Such a Good Idea

For the first time, It had been hurt.

This had not happened, could not happen, should not happen. They were just children, saplings crawling up from the depths of this chunk of stone It had so long lived on. Its influence had formed Derry over time, and It kept a tight grip on the weak-willed adults, preventing them from caring as It claimed Its food, then slept, then ate once more. From the time when humans fearfully scratched drawings of It onto cave walls with sharpened stones, to now, when ghosts were nothing more than bedtime stories, It had ate and slept, and nothing had stopped It.

Yet, they had happened.

The stutterer, so stricken by the loss of his brother, managing to drag all the others into battle against It, and they had all lost their fear of It. The sick boy, no longer afraid of the diseases that he couldn't see. The fat boy, no longer afraid of the headless body he might have become. Even the girl, no longer afraid of her father, and the ways he touched her. They had forced It to feel afraid, injured It, driven It into the darkness, where It could only nurse Its wounds. Pain was new, and fear was new, and It hated both of them.

How could this be? Surely, the children couldn't have done this. Human minds were too small, crumbling into dust at a glimpse of the deadlights. Yet, the girl's brain had healed, something humans could not cause, not on their own.

Was it the Turtle? Had he guided them against It, attempting to interrupt Its feeding cycle that he had so long detested? No, the Turtle was too lazy. He never emerged anymore, and he had not shown his face since the bout of sickness that resulted in the vomit of the universe.

Then, perhaps, were the two of them not alone in the macroverse? Was the...another? Another, who guided the children, working through them against It, suppressing their fears? Another, greater, larger, more all-encompassing than It? Had It ever truly been alone? Why had—

No, no. There was no Other. All that mattered was that It had been hurt by those little brats. All It wanted was to eat and sleep, and they had ruined that for It. At the moment, It wanted nothing more than to rend the flesh from their bones. Perhaps their parents, for those that still had them, oh yes! They would smother their children in their sleep, and teachers would forget those children ever existed! Oh, how glorious—

But no. It had been weakened by their assault. It couldn't assert Its control over Derry now, not without taking time to heal. To heal, It needed to sleep again, and by the time It awoke they would be grown up, their minds dulled, memories of It long forgotten. Their fears would be more abstract, things they could not touch, and thus could not fight their way past. If they remained in Derry, It would be able to manipulate them as easily as any adult once It awoke. Yes, that was it. And if they left Derry, It wouldn't get Its revenge, which was acceptable. But the encounter with the children had left It hungry, deprived of the morsels It had been saving. Fine. It wouldn't be greedy. It would feed one more time, then sleep.

Not in Derry, though. The children were still there, the incident still fresh in their souls. They would see It, come after It, and It couldn't fight them again. No matter. There were other towns, other Earths even, that had never seen Its presence. One feeding would be simple at any of those, and none would be aware.

It opened Its eyes in the deadlights, widening Its gaze. The Earths, spread in front of It like the children's balls that had once lined Its lair. Some It dismissed, as the humans were too aware of the supernatural, the things that stalked the night. One Earth caught Its gaze. Though similar to the Earth of Derry, this one had an aura of greater innocence in its present time, a more peaceful world. Strange energies drifted through the air on this Earth, but It ignored them. They were of no consequence. All that mattered was the food.

Pinkie Pie breathed a sigh of relief as she slapped the last piece of tape against the school wall.

"Okay, Sunset, we're good!" she called down.

"Oh, thank Celestia," Sunset Shimmer answered, relaxing her grip on the ladder as Pinkie climbed down. "I thought we'd never get this finished."

The two girls looked proudly up as the sign, finally affixed to its proper place above the Canterlot High front door, a massive "WELCOME BACK WONDERCOLTS" splayed across the paper. Summer vacation wasn't over for another week, but Pinkie, ever the punctual, had already begun planning the return to school party, and setting up for welcome week. Sunset had been the only one free to help for the day, and though most of the decorations had come up without a hassle, that stupid sign had refused to stay up on one side while they worked on the other. Sunset wished more than anything that Twilight had been around, with her telekinesis, but luckily, they hadn't been screwed without it.

"Yeah," said Pinkie. "Though, why are you thanking Principal Celestia?"

Sunset opened her mouth to explain, only to remember that Pinkie knew exactly why she was doing it. Upon seeing the impossibly wide grin on her friend's face, Sunset rolled her eyes.

"You'd think I'd have kicked those ponyisms after all these years in this universe," Sunset replied. "Seriously, it's hard to remember what it feels like to have hooves."

Pinkie snickered. "Shame Princess Twilight won't let me drop by Equestria. Something about the fabric of reality not being ready for two Pinkie Pies."

Sunset chuckled. "Doesn't surprise me. Anyway, we can just put this equipment away, and—"

"Oh, it's fine, Sunset!" Pinkie cut her off, folding up the ladder and sticking it under her arm. "I can do it. You did your part for today."

"Are you sure? It's really no trouble."

"Nah, I'll be fine. I know you wanted to get to work on that paper tonight." Pinkie grimaced slightly. "Not that I understand why, given that it's our last week of freedom..."

"Hey, you have your party planing, I have my essays," Sunset laughed. "Anyway, see you later!" She waved good-bye to Pinkie as she strolled off.

Pinkie responded in kind, then bent down to grab the rest of the decoration supplies.

At last, a target.

The girl was alone, her friend no longer in sight. She was going back into the school, where It could not sense any others. She would be alone, where It could creep up on her, snatch her, and devour her. Perfect.

It took a moment to study Its food. She was happy, rather upbeat, in fact. Perhaps she had little experience with fear, meaning It would barely have to try to induce terror. That sweet fear, oh, such salting of the flesh! It would feast on her for days.

Something was puzzling, though. It could not quite get a grip on her, or feel exactly what she was afraid of. Now, this had happened before, as some of the food had developed mental blocks against fear. Or they had not discovered what truly scared them themselves. Additionally, this girl was older than most of Its prey. Older than the boy It had eaten in the sewers, older than the weapon that had killed his father for It. She was closer to adulthood. Perhaps her fears had already advanced, no longer merely the creatures that went bump in the night? Then again, she felt young at heart, more than most adults It had come across. Most likely, fear just wasn't very prominent in her mind.

No matter. It wouldn't complain about what Its food was. She was already doomed.

Pinkie froze as she crammed the borrowed items back into the supply closet. She hadn't Ponied-Up, and didn't have the more sensitive ears at the moment, but she could clearly hear a small creaking sound. Ordinarily, she'd have dismissed it as somebody wandering through the school, but the place was empty. Sunset wouldn't be sneaking around without announcing herself. Who could it be? Making sure she had a firm grip on her geode, Pinkie turned around.

And breathed a sigh of relief. It was only a balloon.

Wait, that didn't make sense. Balloons didn't move on their own. And they sure didn't fill themselves up with helium, and float around at some arbitrary height without going up to the ceiling. Pinkie hadn't even brought her helium tank. And yet, there it was, a bright red balloon, lazily drifting through the room, as though pushed by unseen wind.

Though she couldn't explain why, Pinkie couldn't stop herself from following the rubber bag. She was certain it was harmless. It was a balloon, after all.

The balloon, trailing its white string down on the floor, meandered through the storage room, Pinkie close behind. Watching it closely, she noticed that, even more unusually than the balloon's existence was its movement. It clearly avoided all obstacles, never bumping into anything, or moving from its position in the air. As it slipped around a corner, Pinkie came around after it.

"Hiya, Pinkie!"

Pinkie's eyes widened, though more out of surprise than fear. Standing in front of her was a clown, holding the balloon she'd been tracking. He wore a baggy white costume with no other colors, except three red pom-poms affixed where buttons might've been on a normal suit. His hands were gloved, and a white frill extended out around his neck. His face was odd, certainly not as funny as a lot of other clowns Pinkie had ever seen. His face was chalk-white, with a red nose and lips, but two red lines came up from his lips, crossing over his eyes. A poof of orange hair extended from his scalp, though his hairline was clearly receding. The eyes were an odd shade of orange. He was smiling, occasionally giggling to himself, as he stared down Pinkie.

The girl raised her eyebrows at the sight, but smiled brightly at the same time.

"Hi, Mr. Clown! What are you doing in the middle of an empty high school?" she asked.

The clown's smiled faltered a bit, as though he hadn't expected this reaction from the girl. But then it returned full force, larger than before, if that was even possible.

"Oh, Pennywise was just wandering by!" he jubilantly announced, waving his hands. "And I found this place, and there were decorations being set up! It looked so cheery, and I thought 'Ya know, I bet some balloons would brighten that place up!'" He gave a brief giggle, his body quivering as he did so, and Pinkie didn't notice it, but his eyes shifted to a shade of electric blue, almost like her own. "Pennywise the Dancing Clown never passes up a celebration!"

Pinkie stared in silence, perplexed at the man standing before her. Pinkie might've been a bit of a cloud cuckoolander (and she was proud of it), but as her friends knew, she was in no way oblivious. Pennywise gave her the impression not of a fellow human being, but rather something that was trying to pass itself off as a human, with only a vague idea of exactly how humans were supposed to act. It blew Princess Twilight's initial awkwardness in Canterlot High out of the park.

"Uh, thanks, but we are kinda setting up an entire week in advance," Pinkie replied. "Won't the balloons be all out of helium by then? And why is your name Pennywise? That's not a funny clown name."

Pennywise's face dropped again. He looked almost angry at the girl, like the actor behind the character when small children won't play along. His eyes changed once again, the blue being replaced by the strange, writhing orange. He smiled again, but it didn't reach his eye muscles, revealing that his expression was being forced.

"Well, that doesn't mean I can't spice up the party!" Pennywise laughed through clenched teeth, giving Pinkie a clear view of the two buck teeth in the front. "Come on, don't ya want a balloon?" He held out the red, floating object. "Everybody loves balloons!"

"Well, yeah," Pinkie admitted with a shrug. "Thanks and all, but red doesn't work with the theme. If it were Valentine's day, or Christmas, or even early autumn, maybe, but not for the end of summer."

What was going on here? This girl wasn't reacting in a way It'd experienced before. Sure, she was older, but It could feel the youthfulness of her mind. She lived for parties, for things like Pennywise. Why wasn't It affecting her? Even if she hadn't cared for clowns, most humans would've been disturbed at least, or tried to flee at this point. What was this girl?

It groaned in frustration. It was wasting Its time. So she wouldn't taste as good. It could live with that.

"Well, then," Pennywise grunted, releasing his grip on the string and standing up to his full height. "Have you ever floated like a balloon?! Because I can make you float!"

The clown's hands began to contort and twist, tearing through his gloves. Underneath, the flesh was an ugly shade of brown, almost like burned skin, with black, dagger sharp claws on the tip of each finger. His blood-red lips peeled back, revealing rows of uneven, pointed teeth, like those of a shark. His gums actually pushed themselves out of his mouth, and his mouth stretched impossibly wide, like a snake preparing to feast. With an unearthly groan, Pennywise lunged forward, aiming his bite at Pinkie's head.

"Whoa!" exclaimed the teenager as she jumped backwards. Pennywise snapped his jaw closed, narrowly missing her. "Now that wasn't very nice! Why would you try to bite someone for talking to you? And you need to brush those teeth, my goodness! What would Rarity say?"

Pennywise snapped his jaw back into place, glaring at the girl. All pretenses of the fun-loving, joyful clown, as ineffective as they were, had faded. Now, his eyes were filled with rage, and some sort of primal hunger.

Pennywise lashed out with both arms, as they made a sudden shift. Now they were long, gnarled branches, covered with prickly thorns, just like those Gaia Everfree had created. The wooden tentacles lashed out, seeking to wrap themselves around Pinkie's throat, which the girl barely managed to duck under.

"Okay, now you're just being a big meanie!" Pinkie snapped, looking angry for the first time. "You could be using these shifting powers for party tricks, but you're a bad clown!" Pinkie reached into the back of her massive hair, pulling out a familiar bottle of sprinkles. "And you need to learn a lesson!"

Pinkie shook out a tiny pile of the sugary chunks into her palm, before grasping them. Her aura flared to life, a pink silhouette surrounding her entire body, emanating from her geode. Pulling her arm back like a baseball pitcher, Pinkie hurled the glowing pink mass directly into Pennywise's face, smacking the clown monster directly between the eyes. Pennywise actually froze for a moment, before chuckling at the ridiculous attack.

His laughter turned to screams of pain as the sprinkles exploded with a burst of pink smoke. The demonic clown stumbled back, his hands reforming and rushing back to his face, clutching at it. Between his hands, Pinkie saw that Pennywise's face had actually cracked open like a crumbling rock, and chunks of his plaster-white skin fell to the floor and shattered.

"Oh, I'm sorry!" Pinkie exclaimed. "I didn't mean to wreck your face like that! Although, you weren't really a funny-looking clown, anyway. Too scary—"

What Pinkie would've said next is anybody's guess, but the other occupant of the room would never know, nor did he care. Pennywise charged forward with an inhuman roar, his claw finding its way around her throat. The vice of skin and hair clenched around the teenager's neck, lifting her off her feet, and shoving her back into a wall. Pinkie grunted in pain, losing her grip on the sprinkles. Her aura continued to burn, and if she could've turned her head to look at Pennywise's hand, she would've see the burns and blisters that were beginning to form on it, as it stayed in contact with the pink light.

Pennywise didn't care, though.

This wasn't another new experience for It. No, It had felt rage before, most recently directed towards the children of Derry. But this rage, this depth of fury...that was new.

This girl was doing what none before her had done. She was laughing at It. It had clearly just tried to disembowel her, and yet she was laughing. It was incomprehensible. What was worse, her laughter was painful.

Yes, the combined belief of the children had enabled them to hurt It. The bolt gun, with no ammunition, had managed to wound It through the sheer power of will, but It was not surprised by that. This was different. The joy itself of this girl was poisonous, stinging Its avatar with every passing second. And the more pain It was in, the more furious it became.

For this transgression, It would make her pay. It would ensure that, before she died, she would crumble. It would cast her into the deadlights, where even her mind would shatter.

"You think this is funny?!" Pennywise snarled, staring straight into Pinkie's eyes, hate filling his orange orbs. His lips and eyelids twitched as they stared each other down, like he couldn't control his facial muscles.

Pinkie gripped the arms currently pinning her back. Even in the face of the monster clown, a smirk still found its way onto her face.

"Well, kinda," she admitted with a giggle. "You know how some scary movies aren't really good at being scary, so they just come across as kinda silly? This is kinda like that."

Pennywise ground his teeth. "Well," he spat, dotting Pinkie's face with unnaturally cold saliva, "let's fix that."

The clown began to unhinge his jaw again, his eyes rolling to the sides in their sockets. However, he made no move to bite the teenager, as his mouth widened more and more, accompanied by the sounds of bones snapping and some sort wet squelch. Pinkie actually gasped in shock as his upper lip stretched upwards, becoming level with his eyes, as she looked down into the abyssal cavity.

Pennywise's mouth was filled with even more pointed fangs, but not just on the jaws. Instead, irregular rows of teeth seemed to project from every surface of the orifice, poking out of every spare inch of gums without rhyme or reason. What caught Pinkie's eye was the very bottom of his throat, where three balls of vivid orange light danced.

Pinkie Pie blinked. And then she saw eternity.

Eternity was black, blacker than she ever would've predicted. There were no stars out here, no light, none of the things that should've existed, even out in space. And yet, despite all the darkness, she could still see her own form. Pinkie was hurled across the endless expanse, losing all sense of control. She managed to turn her head, seeing Earth as she was launched off of it. A strange, multicolored trail of light grew off of the planet, snaking its way off somewhere that she couldn't see. Pinkie guessed it probably led to Equestria.

Even Pinkie's mind struggled to comprehend exactly what was happening to her. She knew, somehow, that this wasn't a physical occurrence. It couldn't be. In reality, she was still sitting in the supply room, in Pennywise's grasp. If he (or it) had actually thrown her to the edge of the universe, her body would've disintegrated from the speed.

Her thoughts came to an abrupt halt as she slammed into something. There were no discernible objects, so she must've hit the very walls of existence. But like everything else, it was black, like a slab of black marble. Pinkie groaned, annoyed at the pain.

Ouch, this place could really use some decor. How dreary do you have to be to paint everything black?

-silence.

Pinkie couldn't see, but she could feel another, watching her in the depths. She now began to understand that she wasn't fired off of Earth, but pulled. She could feel the same invisible force dragging her further outwards, towards wherever that voice came from.

-the macroverse, My home, My world, where you will wander for eternity.

Pinkie recognized the voice now. It was Pennywise's, but without the clownish inflection that had remained even when he lost his temper. Even more bizarre, the voice was no longer that of a clearly adult man, but some sort of blend, like a male and female voice speaking in perfect sync. This was something unnatural, something that couldn't be, or perhaps shouldn't be.

Looking up, Pinkie beheld It...or at least what she thought was It. A gargantuan mass of orange light, flailing endlessly, stretching farther than she could comprehend. The deadlights had no form she could discern. Shapes flashed across It, and she recognized the form of Pennywise, glaring at her and smiling sadistically, for about one second. Other forms made appearances, including a man with a rotting face, some sort of female figure with an elongated, slender skull, a small boy in a yellow rain coat, and what appeared to be a giant, hairy spider. Pinkie's eyes hurt just from staring at the thing.

Pinkie laughed.

-you dare?! you stand before the deadlights, the eternal, and you mock Me?! mock Me as I prepare to consume you?!

Pinkie Pie kept laughing, barely able to speak though the guffaws. I'm sorry, it's just you made me think of—let me explain. You act all big and scary, but you're just a big bully! And if bullies can't scare you, they get nothing out of it! And if you think you can scare me you've got another thing coming so I'm telling you to take a hike but the thought of a giant orange kaleidoscope hiking... She fell onto her side, shaking with laughter. It makes me think of Applejack 'roughin' it' with a disco ball on her head and that's even funnier—!

It screamed again, the deadlights flaring with rage. The emotion assaulted Pinkie, forcing her to stop her laughing, pinning her to the ground that wasn't there.

-you and your kind are nothing to Me! I will feast on you, as I have feasted on all others! you will wander through the deadlights, lost, mindless, for eternity! your flesh shall sustain My avatar! I will—

This time, It was the one cut off. The interference took the form of a burst of pink light that erupted from Pinkie's body, bathing eternity in the vibrant energy of the teenager. It actually gasped in shock, realizing that the pink light not only hurt Its form on Earth, but here, too.

Getting back to her feet, Pinkie glared at the deadlights, her hands and eyes glowing pink with energy. Behind her, the image of a massive blue balloon formed in the light. Pinkie's hair grew in length, an extension like a pony's tail emerging, and her ears morphed into triangular horse ears.

Now listen here, mister! You can't go around being a big meanie-pants to everyone you meet! You give eldritch abominations a bad name! Now, say you're sorry this instant or I'll put you in time-out.

It blinked, at a loss for words. Hesitantly, It tried to pull on her once more.

Ha.

It grunted in shock as she released a single breath of laughter. Why did that still hurt It—

Ha ha ha!

-stop it.

Ha ha ha!

-I command you to stop—

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

-STOP IT! STOP LAUGHING AT ME!

If It'd had a face and arms, It would've been jamming Its fingers into Its ears, humming at full blast to try and drown out the laughing teenager. Not that it would've helped.

Pinkie released a few more chuckles, watching It writhe for a few more seconds, before she finally stopped.

Now say you're sorry!

It managed to sit up once more, looking Pinkie in the eyes.

-I...I'm sorry.

Say that you won't be mean anymore.

-I won't be mean anymore.

Good! Pinkie folded her arms. Although, it's kinda sad that laughter actually seems to hurt you. I mean, what's life without fun? I know! I could throw you one of my super Pinkie Pie parties and—

-NO! STOP! PLEASE! I'll leave I won't come back just please stop laughing!

Okay, fine, geez. If you're so against fun, maybe you should stop being a clown.

-I will I will just please leave me in peace...

Good. Now go to your room! Or...whatever your call a room!

It turned around, blocking out the light of the deadlights. Pinkie felt the invisible grip release her, and felt herself begin to fall backwards, her real body calling her back.

As she passed back into the universe, Pinkie glanced off to the side, seeing another massive shape staring at her.

Hi, giant version of Tank! Bye, giant version of Tank!

The Turtle smiled happily at the mortal form. Boy, he'd be laughing about that for eons to come.

Pinkie gasped in annoyance and pain as she slumped to the ground, back inside Canterlot High's storage room. Pennywise was no longer there to hold her up, and as she looked over at where he once stood, all that remained was a red pom-pom.

"Huh. That was odd. Oh well," Pinkie declared to nobody in particular.

She picked up the jar of sprinkles, stuffing it into her hair once again, and grabbed the pom-pom from the floor. The fuzzy object found its way straight into the trash as Pinkie walked out with a spring in her step.

Out in the macroverse, It sat quietly, staring at a blank spot. From across space, It heard the Turtle laughing.

-Look who couldn't deal with one laughing—

-shut up.