Fertility Contest
Admiral Biscuit
Night Flower and Toffer sat in a corner booth at the Canterlot Hay Burger, where they often met for lunch.
Usually, they'd gossip about their clients and their friends and the happenings around town, but this time Night Flower had a different topic in mind.
“You ever think of doing something new and different?”
“Eh, not really.” Toffer shrugged. “Why, are you?”
“Yesterday when I was reading the newspaper, there was a little article about odd Equestrian laws, and one of them was that you could challenge the mayor in an earth pony town to a fertility contest.”
“So?”
“So? Don't you think I'd be a good mayor?”
“I guess, maybe? I dunno, have you ever tried being a mayor before?”
“So yesterday, I went to the library and looked up some of the lawbooks and it was true, you could do it. And I got to thinking, 'cause you remember how a coupla moons ago there were a bunch of small-town mayors who all met Princess Celestia?”
Toffer shook her head.
“Well, I happened to see some of them and I remember that Mayor Mare looks like she's getting old. I bet I could challenge her and become the mayor of Ponyville.”
“Why would you want to? I’ve heard it gets attacked by monsters out of the Everfree all the time.”
“See—she's not a good mayor. I'd be better, I know it.”
Her companion shook her head. “Don't be silly.”
♥ ♥ ♥
The idea just wouldn't go out of Night Flower's head, so a week later she boarded the train for Ponyville. When she got there, she walked around a little bit, getting herself used to the town. She liked it—it was small and quaint and despite what Toffer had said, there wasn't a monster in sight.
It didn't take her very long to find the mayor's office, and like everything else in town, it was open and inviting, and despite her not being a resident—and the particular nature of her business—she still got an audience.
Night Flower got right to the point. “I challenge you to a fertility contest for the right of mayor of Ponyville.”
Mayor Mare's face tightened. “Very well. Challenge accepted. State your terms.”
“We don't need witnesses or anything like that?” The lawbook had been somewhat vague on that point.
“I trust you not to cheat. Do you trust me?”
Night Flower shrugged. “I guess.”
The mayor nodded. “There’s an election next fall. A moon before the election, we’ll have some impartial judges decide. If you win, I'll forfeit my candidacy.”
That sounded fair, so they shook hooves, and Night Flower took the evening train back to Canterlot.
♥ ♥ ♥
Finding a suitable stallion wasn't a challenge at all; her regular clientele provided her with plenty. And there were a few that she particularly enjoyed.
She dragged her hooves at first, because getting pregnant was going to mean that she couldn't work until after she’d had her foal, and because she wanted to eye her clients with a more critical eye than she normally did.
But she couldn't wait forever, and the second week after her return, she finally began dropping her contraceptive spell when the right stallions requested her services.
Somehow, the sex felt different now—more passionate, more real, and they noticed, too. It was her most meaningful week at work, and a fitting swan song.
Early that Saturday morning, she went to the doctor and her hopes were confirmed: she had conceived. It was far too early to know the sex of the foal, but that was okay.
♥ ♥ ♥
Night Flower had always been frugal with her bits, and so she had plenty to live on.
She stayed in Canterlot throughout the summer—she loved the nightlife too much to leave the city. But as the leaves began to turn, she decided it was time to move, and settle into her new life in Ponyville.
She rented a charming cottage near the edge of town, and her neighbors were all kind and friendly. They brought her casseroles and planted autumn flowers outside her house, along with rows of bulbs that would bloom in the spring.
It wasn't too long before she was a regular at Sugarcube Corner, starting her day off with pastries that were far better than any she'd ever had in Canterlot. They were bigger as well, which was good. She had more appetite now.
She occasionally saw the mayor around town, and studied her belly with a critical eye. Was she getting bigger? Showing sign of a foal? She barely was, yet—she could tell the difference, although anypony who didn't know her probably wouldn't see it.
Autumn in Ponyville was full of festivals and apple cider and the Running of the Leaves in Whitetail Woods, and then when the days had become chilly and short the whole town transformed for Nightmare Night.
Much to her surprise, Princess Luna visited Ponyville and celebrated Nightmare Night with them. Despite a lifetime of living in Canterlot, this was the closest she had ever seen the nocturnal Diarch.
Autumn turned to winter, and there was another town celebration when the weatherponies brought the first snowclouds. Hot chocolate replaced apple cider as the drink of choice, and the short days bustled with activities. Night Flower bought a beautiful scarf and hat from Rarity, and followed that with a quartet of snowboots. Rarity even fixed the princess dress she'd bought from Sassy Saddles when the Canterlot Carousel Boutique opened.
Everypony in town helped decorate for Hearth's Warming Eve, and Spike the Dragon introduced the pageant. While to her eye the stage wasn't as well-dressed as the one in Canterlot, she had to admit that the costumes were better, and everypony really got into their roles.
At the very end, Sweetie Belle and the Ponytones led the entire audience in Hearth's Warming carols, and then there was a cake and cookie buffet.
She waddled home—she’d eaten far more than she should have.
Foal Moon came, and at the end of the month she delivered a beautiful filly, which she named Jessamine. The mayor produced nothing, and in her heart she knew that she'd already won the contest.
She helped out a little bit during Winter Wrap Up. It was disappointing to not be allowed to use magic to help change the season, but if that was how the town did things, she would.
Just the same, when spring was in the air she sent several telegrams to Canterlot. A few of her favorite clients were willing to come to Ponyville for old time's sake.
Two weeks later, she was pregnant again, and her victory was assured.
♥ ♥ ♥
The summer brought campaign fliers. There were no serious candidates for mayor besides herself, Mayor Mare, and Tinsel Hat whose campaign was mostly a joke: she ran on a platform of dental hygiene and helper monkeys for every citizen of Ponyville.
Of course, Mayor Mare was far ahead in the polling, but Night Flower didn't care. She was going to win on a technicality.
Her few campaign speeches were not terribly well attended, but there were a few ponies who were interested enough in her to promise to vote for her, and as she refined her message and got comfortable at the podium, her audiences got a little bit bigger, eventually growing to several dozen ponies.
One week before her meeting with the mayor, she went to the hospital and got a thorough checkout for herself, Jessamine, and her unborn foal. It probably wasn't necessary, but she wanted to make sure that she covered all her bases.
They had agreed that Applejack, Golden Harvest, and Roma would judge, and that in the event that they couldn't reach a firm conclusion, Princess Twilight Sparkle would settle the debate. It was as fair a judging panel as Night Flower could have hoped for.
She brought all the paperwork in her saddlebags. She'd thought about bringing Jessamine, too, but there was really no need. Everypony in town had seen her, and gushed over her when Night Flower first brought her home.
Her ears flattened in confusion when she stepped into the mayor’s office. Instead of paperwork, Mayor Mare's desk was covered with fruits and vegetables. It looked like a market stall where the proprietrix couldn't decide what to sell and went with everything.
A second table had been set up, as well. She assumed that that was for her, although a bassinet would have been more appropriate. What game is she playing?
♥ ♥ ♥
It only took seconds for the judges to make their unanimous pronouncement. They studied the paperwork she'd provided, and then examined all the produce that the mayor had brought.
“Sorry, Sugarcube, but just havin' a foal don't cut it.”
“What do you mean? Why not? I'm plenty fertile! It didn’t even take a week!”
Roma shook her head. “It's not about having foals. Any mare can do that.”
“She couldn't.” Night Flower pointed an accusing hoof at the mayor. “Not even one. I bet she's not pregnant right now.”
“I'm not.” Mayor Mare shook her head. “I wondered . . . I never saw you out in a garden. I thought that you'd want to practice, or maybe spy on mine and see what I was growing. And then I thought that you could be growing indoor herbs or mushrooms or who knows what. I didn't think you'd misinterpret the law that badly.”
“You've got to be kidding me.”
“I guess when you're a whore, you think like a whore,” Golden Harvest muttered.
Night Flower stomped her hoof. “You take that back!”
Applejack shook her head. “Come on, Goldie, that was uncalled for. She had an honest misunderstanding, that's all. I seem to remember when you were a filly, you reburied your cornstalks 'cause you thought that all plants were supposed to be root vegetables.”
“Fine.” Golden Harvest flicked her tail. “I'm sorry I called you a whore. Even though you are.”
“There's no need to be cruel.” Mayor Mare said. “Night Flower is a very nice unicorn, and Jessamine is a beautiful filly. I’m sure her next foal will be just as beautiful. She's an asset to our community, and I'm proud to have her here. And if she chooses to plant herself a garden and challenge me in the next election, I would welcome it.”
Author's Note
For story notes, simply click here.
