The Pillars' Guides

by Masterweaver

Rating: everyone
Tags: Lyra, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, The Pillars, Slice of Life
Length: 2141

A lot can change in a thousand years. Luckily, this time Luna is prepared.

Seven ponies have been transported from ancient times to the modern era. In their own time, they were heroes, and to this day they are (mostly) remembered fondly. However, the time between their departure and return has left society completely different.

Princess Luna, remembering her own period of adjustment, wisely decides that the Pillars of Equestria need personal guides to this new era.

She, not so wisely, selects them herself without consulting anyone and assigns them to their select heroes.

This... may not end well.

Cover image composed with vectors by thebosscamacho, Hendro107, davidsfire, SketchMCreations, SLB94, FloppyChiptunes, and of course the MLP staff.

Published 2017-11-08 21:50:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-11-08 21:50:06 UTC

In Which The Guides Are Assigned

"I simply cannot believe how tall you've gotten!" Star Swirl said, amused.

Celestia smirked. "Well, it has been over a thousand years." She let her face soften. "Will you stay here and teach magic once again? My sister and I have such fond memories of your lessons."

"As long as you don't ask for those essays we owed you before you disappeared," Luna added.

Celestia and Star Swirl shared a small laugh. The bearded unicorn shook his head, glancing around the throne room. "I'm not certain Canterlot is where I belong. The realm has grown, and I believe I'll have a look around before I settle in any one place."

"And I long to see what has become of my home," Meadowbrook added.

Mistmane smiled faintly. "I believe we all do."

Celestia nodded in acceptance. "Then I hope you will return to Canterlot on occasion and share the wisdom of your great experience with the next generation of ponies."

"We would be honored. But if it is wisdom you seek, look no further than your own pupil." Star Swirl nodded to the lavender alicorn. "She showed me that the power of friendship is a magical force indeed. And that in turning away from others..."

He held out a hoof to the gray unicorn next to him. "...you hurt yourself as well."

Stygian accepted the hoof, and then drew closer. Friends again, the two shared an embrace--an embrace joined by their erstwhile companions, and then by most of the new heroes of the realm.

Twilight Sparkle looked on, faintly smiling. "It's funny. I thought meeting my idol would give me all the answers I ever wanted. But instead, I forgot what I already knew." She turned to the unicorn next to her, wrapping her in a hug. "Good thing I had a student of my own to remind me."

Starlight Glimmer returned the hug warmly. "You pulled me out of my own delusions, Twilight. I'll always be ready to help pull you out of yours."

Sunburst, standing off to one side, cleared his throat. "So. Um. This hugging thing. This is what we're doing. Do I... do I just hug somebody? I'm not very well versed in hugging protocol."

"Yes, well." Star Swirl cleared his throat, pulling his hoof back. "I'm not either, and as heartwarming as this is we have a realm to rediscover, I believe!"

Celestia chuckled as the group broke apart. "That is true. Well, then, I wish you the best of--"

"About that."

The elder princess blinked as her sister stepped forward. "Luna?"

"I apologize for not bringing this up sooner, sister. I had not known if my gift would be ready upon their return, and..." Luna glanced at Stygian. "There were some unforeseen factors that forced me to adjust my plans."

"Plans?" Starlight tilted her head. "What plans?"

"I myself had a period of significant absence from Equestria," Luna explained. "Only slightly less significant than that of the Pillar's own, I believe. It is not... something that I am proud of, but I have learned from it." She gestured around. "One of the things that I learned was how much can change in a thousand years--how little I was prepared for the modern realm. My sister helped, of course, and I am grateful she did so much to speed my reintegration, yet it still took me quite some time to adjust to this world I had returned to. Even the fundamentals of language and etiquette had shifted."

"I remember that," Twilight mused. "You were still using the royal We when you came to Ponyville for nightmare night, and you were operating under... um..."

"I was using a warlord's honor in a time of peace," Luna deadpanned.

"...that's probably one way to put it," Twilight agreed.

"The point I am making is that your explorations of the realm should not be done alone." Luna turned back to the pillars. "Even common turns of phrase might leave you befuddled. Frankly, I'm amazed you've mastered modern speech so well and so quickly."

She paused.

"No, seriously, how did you do that? As I recall, old ponish was the lingua franca at the time, and you all used it as your native tongues were all completely different!"

Star Swirl held up a hoof, paused, and stroked his beard. "That... is actually a very good question. Perhaps our time in Limbo affected us more than we know."

"A stroke of good fortune, then." Luna cleared her throat. "Nevertheless, I felt it behooved me to set about assuring that each of you would receive a guide as you adjusted to this new world. I therefore took it upon myself to select ponies both able and willing to serve as such."

Celestia blinked. "Ah... Luna, that's a good idea, but I had assumed we would simply allow them to keep in contact with Twilight and her friends."

"Twilight and her friends have lives," Luna pointed out. "Aside from being guardians of the world, Twilight is a princess, Rarity runs a fashion empire, Rainbow is a Wonderbolt, Applejack is a farmer--no, while they certainly have the capability for this task, it would be cruel of us to uproot them all from Ponyville beyond necessity. The ponies I have chosen, however, are ready for a broad-traveling adventure, one that might span many moons, and I have done my utmost to prepare them for each of their assigned companions."

"That was very thoughtful of you, Luna." Star Swirl bowed his head. "We are indebted to you for this gift."

Luna chuckled wryly. "Do not thank me yet, old friend. These ponies were ready to be uprooted, and that means they each have their own... quirks, shall we say." Her horn lit up, opening a side door. "We are ready for you now. Please, enter."

At her words, seven mares filed into the room, earning varying degrees of recognition from the Element Bearers.

"Daring Do?!" Rainbow Dash shot up into the air. "Ohmygosh it is so good to see you again!"

"Hey Dash." Daring looked over the ponies. "Wow. Luna wasn't kidding. I mean obviously I know she wasn't but... the pillars, here? Just... wow." She shook her head. "I've seen some impossible things in my day, but this takes the cake."

"Said the heroine of a presumed fictional series," quipped one of the unicorns, adjusting her glasses.

"Moondancer!" Twilight trotted over. "It's so good to see you again. How are you holding up?"

"...Better," Moondancer admitted. "So, I know who those six are, and I know who those five are, but, um..." She gestured vaguely.

"Oh! Right. This is Stygian, he came back with the pillars, and these are Starlight Glimmer and Sunburst, co-magical researchers on the Pillar project." Twilight paused. "I mean, I would have brought you in, but--"

"No, I get it. Fate of the world." Moondancer glanced at the ground. "And I'm just a scholar, not a hero or anything."

"Hey, you're not just a scholar," Twilight assured her. "You're my friend. And Luna wouldn't have chosen you to guide Star Swirl if you weren't something really special."

"Thanks, Twilight. But um... I've been assigned to Somnambula, actually."

Twilight blinked. "Oh. Well that's great too! She's one of the most important heroines of Ankhk'et--I'm pronouncing that right, aren't I?" she added, turning to the pegasus.

"As correctly as your accent allows," Sonnambula replied, amused.

Moondancer cleared her throat. "Wamal fi tahqiq altafahum baynana."

Somnambula blinked. "Lughat aleuraba? Waqad khatabi shaebih waqad nasi dhilk?"

Moondancer winced. "Lisu' alhuz, fa'iinah tuufiy biha qabl thlatht qurun. Kl ma tabaqaa hi shazayana maktubatun."1

"...Then I suppose I shall have to adjust to this new speech," Somnambula decided. "Let that which is dead rest."

"You are quite the educated young mare," Star Swirl noted. "I'm rather surprised Luna did not see fit to assign you to me."

Luna's smile was most definitely not a smirk. "I felt Miss Heartstrings here would serve you better."

The indicated green unicorn waved. "Sup."

Star Swirl looked her over for a moment. He glanced to Twilight and Moondancer, both of whom had suddenly gone stonefaced. He turned back to Luna.

"She's like Clover, isn't she."

"Not entirely," Luna replied. "She has a sense of decorum and comes complete with a respectable companion to restrain her more unusual urges--one whom I've assigned to Stygian. But, yes, she does tend to view everybody equally."

Star Swirl sighed wearily. "What is it about genius that makes ponies so... odd?"

"Said the stallion with bells on his head," the unicorn replied.

The cream-colored mare next to her brought her hoof to her face. "Lyra, please don't antagonize the ancient important wizard, okay?"

"Nah, don't worry Bonbon, he can take it." Lyra nodded at the stoic face of Star Swirl. "See? Underneath that mop of his he's grinning like a loon."

"I am not."

"You totally are."

Star Swirl sighed. "Just like Clover..."

"So hey, Daring." Rainbow hovered over to the adventurer. "If Moondancer's got Somnambula, I guess you were assigned to Flash Magnus, right?"

"Actually I'm supposed to be Rockhoof's guide." Daring shrugged. "I mean, I'd have liked Somnambula, sure, but... I guess Luna has her reasons."

"I guess that... makes sense. Rockhoof's a pretty stoic guy--he doesn't get moving easy, but when he moves he MOVES. If you two are partners, I think it could work out."

Flash Magnus nodded. "Man of action and few words, our Rocky. So, which of you lovely ladies did the night princess grant me for escort?"

A pale pegasus saluted. "V-Vapor Trail, sir! Wonderbolts Cadet, sir! It is an honor to meet you, sir!"

Flash chuckled. "Honor is earned through deeds, cadet Vapor. I'm sure you'll find enough of it guiding me through this modern Equestria."

"Y-Yes sir! I shall try, sir!"

"Whoa-ho-ho there, honeybiscuits." A flashily dressed earth pony put her hoof on the trembling pegasus's shoulder. "No need to be so formal, we're all friends here, right?"

"That's Flash Magnus!" Vapor Trail whispered. "He's, like, the prototype Wonderbolt!"

"Be that as it may, he's got a thousand years worth o' catchin' up to do, and he's not going to be havin' an easy time if you're too in awe to talk to him. Just relax, kaykay?"

"Yes. Right." Vapor Trail took a breath. "Thank you, miss Shores."

"Not a prob, hon. I've seen starstruck enough for me to know how to handle it." The earth pony turned to the others. "Now which one of you is Meadowbrook?"

Mage Meadowbrook smiled. "That'd be me. I must say you look like quite the character--a performer, am I right?"

"Yep! Leading edge of all things pop--I write the songs, sing 'em to crowds, and put on the best shows."

"Really?" Applejack smirked. "What about Countess Coloratura?"

The mare chuckled. "She's got skill, I'll grant you, and she may be higher on the charts now, but just you wait--Sapphire Shores is goin' to go down in history as the Pony of Pop, no question!"

Meadowbrook blinked. "Pony of...?"

"Pop. Short for popular music. Basically I'm defining the genre."

"Ah. Ambitious."

Mistmane gave a small chuckle. "Ambition is alright, so long as it's tempered by compassion." She turned to the final mare. "So then, I suppose that leaves you with me, young lady."

"Yep. Can I say... like... you've got a real amazing aura girl."

"Oh? You're an aura seer?"

The green mare nodded. "The flow of the universe is open to me."

"Aheh." Rarity cleared her throat. "Princess Luna, not to question your judgement, but from my conversations with Tree Hugger she's a little... shall we say... easily distracted?"

"I have little doubt that Treehugger's unique perspective on the universe will help in Mistmane's exploration of this new realm," Luna replied with utmost confidence.

Celestia looked over the gathered ponies and, after a moment, cleared her throat. "Well. Luna. This is certainly a... surprise. And one I quite approve of, don't get me wrong, I just... would have liked to have been kept in the loop."

"As I said, sister, I was not assured that my selected would be ready--but by good happenstance, they are."

"It's not that," Celestia whispered. "It's more... why these ponies, Luna? There are so many other options--I hate to sound dismissive, but there are so many better options!"

Luna gave her a flat look. "Better by some standards, perhaps. Rest assured, though, this is not merely a matching of ability, but personality."

She looked at the crowd. "With the effort I put into this, I do not think anything could go too badly."

Author's Note

1"I hope to bring understanding between us."

"The language of the Arabians? Has my own people's speech been so forgotten?"

"Unfortunately, it died out three centuries ago. All that remains are written fragments."