No-Clop November 2017

Far away from mainland Equestria, on an island that was more volcano than island, Ember, the unquestioned lord of all dragons, watched with hopeful excitement as a thick cord of emerald green flames traced its way through the sky above the vast ocean around her mountaintop throne. The fiery rope swerved and swayed, almost like it was intentionally teasing her, but eventually it made its way to her window like she somehow knew it would, and curled itself into a tight spiral in front of her face.

Ember held out her hands expectantly, and the fire poofed out of existence, replaced by a small scroll bearing the seal of the Equestrian Ambassador to the Dragon Lands. Or just Spike, as she refused to call him that long-winded nonsense, no matter how much it made him do that cocky, sexy little strut of his. She popped the seal impatiently and almost ripped the scroll open, greedily drinking in the words she hoped would be found within:

Ember.
Equestria. Now.
Bring that sexy body.
Where doing it girl
Where MAKING THIS HAPEN

Spike

Okay, that was decidedly not quite the words she’d been hoping to find. Either Spike was making some kind of obscure reference to something, or he’d been concussed while writing to her. But she didn’t really care which. The message was clear.

The time had come again. Ember was invited. And she couldn’t wait to get another taste of that sweet, sweet dragon dick.

“Yes. Hell yes. Hell fucking yes,” she chanted to herself, and launched herself out the window on a beeline for Equestria.

“Luna.”

“Mmrrrhh.” The princess of the night stirred, reluctantly, squinting her eyes shut against the sunlight as her sister’s softly scolding voice dragged her from her pleasant dreams, and immediately she struggled to return to them. There were numerous cute ponies there, stallion and mare alike, and they were all very eager to add to the satisfying tickle of pleasure between her hind legs…

Unfortunately Princess Celestia was not content to let her return to the dreamscape. “Luna, wake up,” she said, a bit louder this time, and the pleasant tickle in Luna’s loins suddenly became a rather uncomfortable prodding.

Luna let out an annoyed grunt and refused to open her eyes. “Mmmff, five more minutes, Tia…”

“We don’t have five more minutes, Luna. We are expected in Ponyville within the hour, and you are not ready.”

Luna waved a hoof dismissively in the general direction of her sister’s voice. “We are the leaders of Equestria, sister, we have five more minutes if we say we do.”

“Luna.”

“We have until midnight, Tia. Five more minutes will not cause us to miss the cutoff. I will rise shortly, you need not prod my nethers about it.”

“Luna, I’m not the one doing that.”

Luna frowned at that, and with a sigh that melted into a hum of curiosity she opened her eyes and lifted her head at last.

There was a pony passed out on top of her crotch.

Well, that explained a few things.

He was a stallion, slim and toned, and he was softly snoring as he slept, his slow, deep breaths fluttering gingerly over her nethers, which she didn’t particularly mind. But he also happened to be a thestral, one of her elite night guards, and so whenever he shifted in his sleep his fanged jaws had a tendency to poke her in some sensitive places.

Huh. Now why in Equestria was one of her personal guards asleep face down between her legs?

Luna glanced around her bedroom, fully awake now, and saw no less than four more ponies, all from the night guard, passed out in the bed with her. Most of them were stallions as well, though she recognized at least one mare, and all of them were smeared with some rather pungent-smelling fluids. Herself especially, she realized after a moment, though the one mare she could see was also similarly well-coated in the stuff, and as she spied the stallions’ mostly flaccid but still unsheathed cocks laying limp and dripping on her bedspread, she thought she had a decent idea what said fluid was.

What had she been doing all day--?

Oh.

Oh, right.

Yeah, now it was all coming back to her. A night full of anxious nerves about the month ahead. One bold guard with an off-hoof suggestion. A quick and delightfully successful poll for volunteers. A few drinks to lubricate things - along with some actual lube - and then the rest of the day was something of a blur, but she was waking up in bed with around a half dozen other ponies, there was a great swell of contentment and satisfaction in her core, and everything between her teats and her back thighs was thoroughly covered in stallion jizz, so she must have been having a very fun morning.

“Get it all out of your system?”

Luna looked over at her sister, blushing for the briefest of moments, and smiled in return. “Yes, I believe I have. My ponies have performed admirably, and I believe I am prepared to endure the next month.”

“I should hope so. After our success last year, I will expect nothing less from the both of us this year as well.”

“I will be fine, I’m sure. What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Are you not going to relieve yourself before we go?”

For the first time in the conversation Celestia cracked a smile. “Who says I did not?”

“Oh-ho? Do tell.”

“I may have observed your example and… refined it, for my own purposes.”

“Ha! I doubt that. You do not look the part at all.”

“Perhaps I simply had the sense of mind to finish my business and clean myself up for the journey at a reasonable hour instead of falling asleep in a pile of my own filth.”

Luna scoffed at her. “Beware your tongue, sister! Those are fighting words!”

Celestia simply smirked and turned to leave her sister’s bedchamber, stopping at the door. “Well, if you don’t believe me, you could always help me do something about it on the carriage ride to Ponyville…”

Luna’s mock-anger vanished as quickly as it came. “…Oh?”

Celestia looked back, wiggling her eyebrows and flicking her tail just so, giving her sister a perfect but far too brief glance at the pink folds beneath it. “If you manage to make yourself presentable before we are scheduled to depart. My escorts will not wait.”

Luna’s eye twitched, drawing in a deep breath, and though Celestia closed the door on her way out, she could still hear Luna’s bellowing.

“NIGHT GUARD! RISE AND SHINE AND ON YOUR HOOVES! YOUR PRINCESS REQUIRES BATHING, POST HASTE!”

Celestia paused to laugh at the immediate bangs and crashes of toppling ponies and rattling armor before carrying on toward the courtyard to await her carriage. Perhaps if Luna took long enough, she’d have time for a quickie with the drivers, too…

Later, at the Castle of Friendship…

“Hey Twi?”

“Yes, Spike?”

“Luna and Celestia’s carriage is here.”

“Oh, good, we should go out and meet them, then.”

“Actually, it’s been here. For like ten minutes.”

“What? And you’re just now telling me?!”

“I was waiting for them to come out.”

“Well, go greet them already!”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?!”

“They still haven’t come out.”

“…They’re still in the carriage?”

“Yeah.”

“…Uh…”

“And now it’s rocking.”

“…Rocking.”

“Like, shaking back and forth.”

“Yes Spike I know what rocking means.”

“Now their escorts are giving it weird looks.”

“Well I should hope so, it’s their job to investigate--”

“Aaaand now they’re getting in the carriage too.”

“…Oh for the love of--”

“It just started rocking a lot harder.”

“Okay thank you Spike I get it.”

“…Wanna go down and join ‘em?”

“…Mmmhh. Fine. I suppose we can be a bit late for the Nightmare Night party…”

“Sweet. Dibs on Celestia.”

“Oh, hay no you don’t…!”