Rarity Identifies As A Wagon

by Evictus

Rating: teen
Tags: Rarity, Random, Sweetie Belle, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1621

Rarity feels like a wagon

One day Rarity feels like she doesnt want to be a mare anymore so she changes her gender to the utter confusion of the townsponies and her friends

Published 2017-11-03 22:50:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-11-03 22:50:06 UTC

Did You Just Assume My Gender!? (TRIGGERED)

Author's Note

Attention! This is a satire trollfic about different gendered people and it's not to be taken seriously, it's making fun of the I identify as a helicopter meme, I am in no way making fun of different gendered people I just wanted to write about the meme. Thank you lol - Evictus

Did You Just Assume My Gender!? (TRIGGERED)

Sweetie Belle was in her bed during the night as she was getting ready to sleep she heard Rarity talking to someone outside, she wondered who it was as Rarity's friends never come over at night unless it's a sleepover, she wanted to ask Rarity who it was but she knew that Rarity might not tell her.

Hours later, Sweetie Belle was waking up, she could feel that she was awake but she had her eyes closed so she opened them and saw that it was sunny, it looked like it was a beautiful day, she got out of bed and went downstairs for breakfast. When she got their Rarity already had made her breakfast so she dug in.

Rarity waited for her sister to finish eating as she didn't want to distract Sweetie Belle from having breakfast by telling her what she wanted to tell her, after Sweetie Belle finished breakfast she cleaned up for herself and Rarity spoke.

"I have something to tell you and it's very important...you might not see me during the weekend anymore if I win this...I've been thinking about doing this for a few years now...Sweetie Belle I was thinking about well I'm thinking about it a lot actually..." Rarity started to go on but Sweetie Belle just want to hear it.

"Just spit it out Rarity, you don't have to stutter about this just come out and say it, I'm not going to judge you or anything so just tell me what you want to say." Sweetie Belle said, Rarity sighed as she got to the point.

"Sweetie Belle, I have felt this way for a very long time but I was to afraid to say it, I see these other ponies having gender identities so I want to come out and say it, I identify as wagon, all my life I've always wanted roll around and deliver stuff to people, you must use my correct pronoun which is it." Rarity ranted.

Sweetie Belle stared at her like she was crazy, she was trying to figure out why she was acting like this and she realized that she might be making fun of LGBT community.

"Are you mocking ponies with real gender issues or are you actually being serious right now? Because it seems your using satire to mock ponies with real issues." Sweetie Belle said while she was utterly confused.

"How dare you think I'm mocking ponies! That offends me! I know in my heart I am a wagon and you will never take that away from me!" Rarity declared.

Sweetie Belle had no idea what was going on, she wondered if Rarity had completely lost her mind or if she was really being serious. Sweetie Belle wanted to point out that a wagon wasn't a legal gender.

"Rarity you can't identify as a wagon because that's not a real gender, transgenders are real though and I think that your mocking ponies with real issues. You are a mare!" Sweetie Belle said with a confused expression, unknown to her she had just triggered Rarity.

"Did you just assume my gender!? Your just a bigot like the rest of the townsponies if you can't accept my sexuality then you are a bigot!" Rarity ranted, Rarity knew that she was on a mission, she was going to get recognition whether ponies liked it or not, far and wide she protested Equestria's gender stereotypes until Twilight confronted her on it.

"Rarity why are you going around saying this nonsense, first of all your mocking the LGBT community which I find it awful that your doing that and second even if you honestly felt this way about yourself, you are a pony, you were born a pony and you lived as a pony but now you say that you want to be a wagon even if you aren't a wagon, ponies can't be wagons as it's scientifically impossible to be an inanimate object!" Twilight ranted.

"Twilight you just don't understand! I have felt like this all my life! You are all just uneducated! I demand my rights as a wagon and I believe that the discrimination against wagon identifying ponies must end! I will get equal rights!" Rarity declared.

"Rarity what your saying is nonsense, a wagon isn't a real gender! You can't be a wagon! You are a pony and ponies can't become inanimate objects or identify as inanimate objects you just making fun of transgenders!" Twilight ranted as she couldn't believe Rarity could be this dumb she wondered if Rarity was being dumb or was just trolling every pony.

"No I will not back down from my beliefs! I will gain my right as a wagon! I'll show you and I'll prove everypony wrong! Because we deserve equal rights!" Rarity declared she ran off to do what must be done while Twilight wondered what in Tarturus just happened.

Rarity could not believe the disrespect from one of her best friends in all of Equestria, she was going to spread her message far and wide so that non gender and non binary ponies can rally up and be inspired by her message.

Rarity spread her important message of ponies that identify as wagons all around Ponyville to the dismay of every citizen there, Celestia and her friends had no idea why she was going on about a made up gender but Rarity didn't care, she was going to persist until she got the recognition that she deserved.

Rarity never rallied anypony to her side though as most ponies thought that she was making fun of ponies who didn't identify as colt or mare and she said that was the point she was getting at all her life she always felt she wanted to a be a wagon, she knew that it was true as she could feel it in her heart.

Rarity persisted days on end and it was driving Ponyville mad, everyday she would get up and persist the mayor to let her change her legal gender on her birth certificate until finally Twilight went up to her and brought her over to a mirror.

"Rarity what do you see in the mirror? Tell me." Twilight said, Rarity knew what she was getting at but she just didn't understand why she couldn't identify as a wagon.

"I'm a pony I know that but why can't I identify as a wagon?" Rarity asked, Twilight sighed as she was sick of this.

"Because ponies can't identify as wagons as they are inanimate objects, if you figured out you were transgender or gay then fine that would be realistic and you would be treated equally like a straight pony and me and your friends would accept you for being gay or transgender but you are going around and saying your a wagon and you can't be a wagon Rarity you are a pony! And doctors can't change your gender to wagon and they can't change you into a wagon as its not a living being! Even if you dressed up as one you still would be a mare." Twilight exclaimed.

Rarity looked at her and tried to argue with Twilight but as she looked at herself she realized that Twilight was right, she tried to come up with some argument but Twilight's common sense was winning. She finally gave up as Twilight was telling the truth.

"I'm sorry Twilight, I shouldn't have gone around and proclaimed that I was wagon, I just don't understand why it's a silly thing to identify as one. I just see all of these other ponies having different sexual orientations and genders that I just thought that I could be a wagon" Rarity said.

"That's okay Rarity, Listen if somepony identifies as LGBT then that's great, even if they identify as pansexuals or asexuals as well then that's fine because they are also real sexual orientations so don't mock any of those ponies as it's hurtful. Do you understand?" Twilight asked, Rarity nodded as she understood what Twilight was saying.

"Yes I do Twilight. Thanks for making me realize that." Rarity said, Rarity went around and apologized to everypony that had to see her act silly like that, after a while Rarity and Twilight hung out for a bit and while they were hanging out Twilight started to wonder about something.

"By the way Rarity what do you identify as?" Twilight asked, Rarity thought about Twilight's question for a few moments as she tried to feel how she felt.

"Well, bisexual really, I've known a lot of mares and stallions and I've had crushes on some of them, do you think I'll ever find somepony to love?" Rarity asked, Twilight nodded.

"You will Rarity, you just have to meet some mares and stallions before you decide." Soon they went into town and Rarity apologized for her antics and told everypony what she really identified as and they all accepted her, soon after Rarity met a mare and started going out with her and she was happy that she finally got somepony who will love her equally. All of her friends were happy that Rarity realized who she was and they were happy that Rarity had finally met somepony to have a relationship with. They congratulated her and she thanked them as she lived happily with her newfound sexual orientation.