Convalescence

Magic is about as common as any other basic law of physics in our daily lives. Just as there is gravity at work, so too are the arcane forces flowing all around us, manipulating and being manipulated in turn.

It would be easy to make the mistake of thinking that only a third of the pony population has reign over magic. In reality, everyone has a capacity for it in their own right. Unicorns might have their spells down a somewhat-tangible science, but magic has proven time and time again to be far more than mere spells. Pegasi have their weather and flight magics, and earth ponies have their peculiar earthiness.

It's more than mere science. It's certainly more than friendship.

Magic is anything and everything.

Included within anything and everything: confusing, annoying, and dangerous.

When I finally got back to Grape Vine's jungle-abode that night, my knees were trembling as much as my teeth. A dis-band would be welcomed in open forelegs. Though it would be an egregious improper use of punitive arcano-technology, running that much is not something my body was ready for. Not now, not ever. Canterlot is a big city, alright? Great, big, alicorn, princess-sized.

Maneuvering the spare key with a wing, I entered, quiet as a ghost, powered by the hope that my host had gone to bed. Out of courtesy, I tried to move as gingerly as possible, but the sound of music echoing from somewhere made me slip and fall against the wall with a thud. Part of me wanted to sneak to my room and ignore the situation, but after that debacle earlier, it wasn't hard to imagine that my curious friend would make the small effort to physically drag me out of bed to get an explanation. Might as well play into her "I know something's up and we're going to talk about it" scenario.

Following the source of the music, I went upstairs to the top floor and arrived at the sunroom, custom designed by the owner herself. The lights were out, leaving the room dimly lit by the crackling glow of the fireplace. Tall windows, inky with night, loomed from on high. The silhouettes of vines snaked around their edges, making me feel surprisingly uncomfortable.

Grape Vine herself was on the far side of the room, reclining in a velvet-lined armchair, reading a book by firelight. Here, closer up, I could clearly identify the crazy noise spouting from the antique phonograph beside her. She obviously had to have seen me, but chose not to speak first. A classic power-play. I could respect that.

"Brubuck, huh? Didn't know you were into this sort of stuff," I said. The casual atmosphere I tried to craft was immediately shattered by me wincing at a sudden outburst of fiery trumpets.

She didn't seem to stop reading as she responded. "I've been told that the best jazz is most enjoyable for the performers, not the audience. Especially for a piece as avant-garde as this."

I kept my mouth shut as the song transformed into a boisterous drum solo that must have involved about thirty separate things getting whacked and clattered at the same time. Avant-garde indeed. Too much cowbell for my liking.

"That being said, I do still find this piece entertaining. It's good to just experience, you know? Experience without understanding. There's something to that, I think." Grape Vine said. She turned another page, her focus uninterrupted by our conversation.

I bit back the rising temptation to ask what in the hay she was talking about that for, and what she was reading so late at night, but I fancy myself a good sport. Some ponies like to live their lives dramatically, and I'm not one to judge. Life is chock-full of comedy and tragedy as is.

"Yeah," I said, "there's plenty of things I don't understand that I still enjoy. Most things are like that, really." The music quieted down, and as it reached the end of the record, I thought I recognized the book, but the angle of flickering light was making it impossible to see the front cover with any clarity.

"Don't give me those empty words." The book slammed shut. "Please. Can you be sincere with me, Lily?" She asked.

"Huh?" I said, followed by a mild coughing fit. Her words slid like a block of ice down the back of my neck. I took a few steps until I was closer to the center of the room. "If this is about earlier I was going to explain-"

"It is about earlier. But I don't want you to explain anything to me. I just want to understand something." The book floated over to me, far quicker than necessary.

I glanced at the cover. Steps to Forgiveness. The last place I left it was under my pillow.

"Step one: determine the cause of distress." Grape Vine recited. "Do you still remember walking through those 'steps' with me?"

"Of course I do. Along with every last detail of every client I've rehabilitated." I said, swelling with pride.

"I hate that word you use," Grape Vine scowled, tossing another log into the fire, releasing an angry spray of sparks. "Rehabilitate." The word dripped with acid as she spoke. "As if there's something wrong with us. Like we're sick. Addicts."

Deflating, I stepped over to her side. She shrank at my approach, but let me put a comforting wing over her shoulder anyway.

"I'm sick and tired of being treated like this for wanting to do the right thing," she spat. She was angry, but there was also a great deal of pain behind those words. Her hooves pushed deep indents into the cushions, and her teeth were grit together. I hadn't noticed her agitation earlier, but remembering what Sun Downer and Pumpkin said before came rushing back. Felon.

"I can't go a day without looking in the mirror and being reminded of this... shackle they locked me up in." She pointed to the restrictor ring encircled around the base of her horn. The normally silver-colored ring glowed a burning orange in the reflected firelight. The heat even crept into the center of her eyes, as she sat up. "Me, of all ponies! A star detective, for crying out loud! It's like they only care about what I did, without a thought about why I would."

She looked away. "And I didn't even get a chance to use it." That last part had a hint of disappointment in it, but I let that slide.

"Look, Vinny, I understand where you're coming from. So much of my own job is trying to get the truth out of ponies, and Celestia knows it would be that much easier if everypony would just be honest about themselves. But it wouldn't be fair."

"Fair to who?"

"Fair to them. The truth of the matter is, the truth can be frightening. Reality can be imperfect, unpleasant, and shameful. So it goes that ponies would be afraid of you." I took my wing off of her, opting to lay down next to the comforting fire. "Ponies can do awful, ridiculous things when they're scared. It's not uncommon to see them try to run from their fears. But if you try to run from yourself, you'll run yourself into the ground," I said with a sigh. The fire was pretty calming. Mesmerizing, even.

"Well, it's certainly unfair to me," she said, in a mock-offended tone.

"Your spell certainly did break a couple laws of equinity," I shot back. "A lot of ponies find torture distasteful."

"Do you?" She asked.

"I... think there are better ways."

"That's not a 'no,' but whatever. I remember you saying something like all this a while ago. It's about as comforting as it was before." Sarcasm.

"That's how you know it's real."

"So what's the moral here? Life sucks? Don't step up and do anything about it, and fall in line with the way everyone else does things?"

"Uh, not exactly? There's no moral or anything like that. It's not my place to try and teach you anything. I just try to help you find your place if it seems like you're losing your way." I said.

"That's just it though! What if I'm not the one who is the problem, but society?" Grape Vine pointed up through the window, right at the pale crescent moon above. "Over a thousand years ago, Princess Luna was angry that ponies were ignoring her beautiful moonlit wonderland, so she lashed out in anger. Yeah, I get it, that was totally not okay on her part, but do you really blame her for feeling dejected? For wanting to make a change when nopony else would?"

"It's a little grand to compare yourself to the princesses, but sure, I'm listening."

"Just imagine! 'Oh, dear sister, why won't you keep doing your thankless job? What, you want to stop? How about I banish you to the moon for a thousand years?'" Grape Vine said. I must admit, her impression of Celestia was comically accurate. Voice-wise, at least. She did leave out some details, like the magical corruption and possible mind-state alterations, but her point was clear enough.

"Point is, maybe some ponies should have- I don't know- stayed up later? Would that really be so hard? I pulled tons of all-nighters when I was still employable." She let out a choked laugh. "Even Luna, bent on dominating the entire world, gets off easier than little me. Equestria loves her, because she's special and important and beautiful. Because she's powerful." At first she seemed resentful, but by the end of it, the tone of Grape Vine's rant was starting to sound like she was just rattling off facts.

"So what are you getting at with this?" I asked, though I already had an answer in mind.

"It's not society that needs to forgive me. It's not you that needs to forgive me," she said, "it's me that needs to forgive society. And I'm having a hard time being the bigger pony, because I'm not. I'm just me. A cruel and reckless fool who can't stand to have things not go her way." She sank into her chair, and for the first time in a while, I saw the weight that dragged at her features. It was a look I'd seen many times in the mirror. A face worn out from false smiles.

"I'm sorry. That sounds like... a really big, identity-crisis-level issue. It might take me a few days to help you get through it." I said, one of those false smiles creeping up on me. Old habit.

"Are you making fun of me? Just a few days?"

"No, to the 'making fun of.' Yes, to the 'few days.' I'm dreadfully busy this week, but in the meantime, you should get back to reading this." I tossed her the Steps, which she deftly caught in her magic.

"It should keep you right in that place between hope and skepticism. You know, uh, uncertainty. Now, if you don't mind, I have to be awake in... three hours. I'm not even going to ask why you went through my belongings to find that journal, because it doesn't matter. Unless you say it does." I said.

"Oh. Okay. Good night, then." She said, though she still seemed down. Good.

"Vinny. One more thing," I said. "Don't ask how, but I'll have that restrictor ring off your horn before the weekend, so don't feel too down."

Cloudy mornings are normally enjoyable. Just not when you expect to be running around outside during the cold seasons.

Gray, fat clouds bulged in a solid layer stretching across the sky, heavy with rain and sleet and ugh. Thankfully, there was a wealth of complimentary umbrellas at HQ that I was happy to take advantage of once the long day was over. I'd mention what happened in the classes, but I can't say I paid any attention to anything. It was remarkable how many ponies were in training to be rehabilitators, though. Attendance was through the roof- literally! Temporary cloud classrooms on top of the complex had to be constructed just to accommodate the influx of new recruits. And let's just say that cloud desks make for good sleeping surfaces.

It was also the day I was supposed to be meeting Rafflesia again. I would have to sprint to our rendezvous point if I wanted to be on time before the sun set. I could only hope Rafflesia would be as prompt. Knowing Sun Downer's schedule, even a single minute in the wrong place would incur an unpleasant amount of wrath and paperwork. I also wouldn't want Dean Glimmer to get involved.

As the day's final classes let out, I dared to sneak a peek at the sky through a window. It didn't take long to lock onto my target, what with pegasus eyesight and all. Sure enough, Sun Downer was up there, her carmine mane vivid against the grayscale backdrop. She seemed to be scanning the crowd of ponies leaving the building intently, from behind her own safety cloud. The sun hadn't yet set over the horizon, but evening was starting to show in the tint of the skies. It would only be a matter of time before she would shift personalities into a much more hooves-on approach. Then there would be no escape.

I dashed into the hallway, right into somepony going the opposite direction, knocking us both over and the umbrella out of my grip.

"Gosh, I'm sorry, miss," the moss-green earth pony said. From his accent, it sounded like he came all the way from Whinnyapolis.

"No, I'm sorry." I said.

"No, no, I'm sorry." He said.

"No, no, no, I'm-" I took a deep breath. "Let's get on with it." My eyes fell upon the umbrellas we dropped. Identical copies. "Which is which?"

"Oh yah, they're all the same cheap kind the company mass orders, don't ya know? Plain black with the logo on it." He said dismissively, taking one and giving me the other.

"Hey, wait one whinny-ing second!" He exclaimed, not budging an inch from his incredibly cheery and friendly demeanor. "I was looking for you! You're that Spa-fee-tha-ly pony, yah? Sorry, but how'd you say that name of yours again?"

"Just call me Lily, it's fine."

"Lily." He smiled. "I'm in administration, don't ya know? And we got some reports from your minder that you're up to no good. No good at all."

"Oh yeah?"

"Oh yah, you betcha. She's been saying terrible things like 'this pony is spending time with her friends' and 'staying out with them late at night.' Are these crimes true?" He seemed on the verge on laughter.

"Guilty as charged, sir." I frowned. "Sorry, but I don't actually recognize you."

"Oh, that's right. You've never seen me because I'm the newest member of the surveillance board. Just got started a couple days ago, and I gotta say, this place sure is different from Whinnyapolis. Much warmer weather, much colder ponies!" He extended his hoof. "Call me Safe Keeper, and don't worry one bit. You won't have any minders breathing up and down your neck all the time. I've reduced the jurisdiction that Sun Downer has over your personal activities." That came as a surprise. Security measures being lightened? He really was new.

"Well, Mr. Keeper, it was nice meeting you, but I've got one of those 'friends' of mine to spend time with. Maybe even late into the night."

"Yah, you have yourself a good evening, then. And don't have too much fun. Sorry!" He said, joining the rest of the crowd to leave. Looking around, it seemed everyone had the same idea of leaving as fast as possible.

And they all had the same black umbrella.

I scouted the hallways for the biggest crowd possible. Thankfully, psychology one-oh-one just let out, unleashing about a hundred and fifty eager recruits into the city. I dove in, mixing in with the masses. It's easy when you belong to a herd species. The moment we reached the front exit, a phalanx-formation of umbrellas opened up, with me doing my part in the center. There was no chance Sun Downer could pick me out, not until the crowd thinned out at least. Still, I didn't dare to chance a peek. Even if she was told to back off, something tells me she would be able to make a case for herself if she saw me with a runaway prison escapee.

By the time I reached the street with the address of the rendezvous point, I was still in a group of about a dozen. Better yet, Sun Downer was nowhere to be seen, above or on the ground. In a fluid motion, I peeled off into a shaded alley. Yeah, not exactly inconspicuous, but still, I wanted something private. Maybe I've seen too many movies. Whatever.

I just hoped the place I had in mind was still in business.

"Looks like the fortune-telling economy is still going strong," I said to myself, parting the stringed beads that served as a door. Right away, an animatronic stallion wearing a turban perked up and stared at me from its glass casing. Its eyes were enchanted gems, made to resemble the real thing. But this model was showing its age, as made evident by the crackling voice box and stiff movements. The rust was just icing on the metal cake.

"Welcome, traveller. You have come a long way to reach the realm of Mystic Seance, greatest and most powerful oracle! What is it that you seek? Knowledge? Fame? Power?" It said, in a saddle-arabian accent. The thing even had a well-groomed imitation mustache. A small red light blinked on at the corner of the booth's pedestal as a bored, feminine voice spoke.

"Low power detected. Recharge required soon."

"I'm just seeking for a friend. You see her? About a head taller than me, colored like a ripe peach." I said.

"Processing." The machine blinked its milky eyes while I took the time to take in the surroundings. Wallpaper resembling the constellations in the night sky lined the walls, which themselves supported numerous peeling posters about various psuedo-magical techniques that pseudo-guaranteed results that no other magic could provide.

The fortune teller whirred to life again. "Ah yes, it is relationship advice you seek! Yes, very good, take a seat and stare into the crystal ball."

"No thanks, I'm good."

"Come, come, I insist! First fortune is free of cost. Price of not knowing what comes next, now that may cost a fortune!" Its servos whirred and shrieked as the robot shrugged.

"I am a few minutes early, I suppose." What can I say? The machine was pretty convincing. Plus there wasn't anything else to do while waiting. "Fine, you got me."

"Yes, good! I knew you had some sense in you. Now come, focus your gaze. What do you see within the crystal?" A violet light grew from within it.

"Actually, that looks more like treated glass than crystal," I said, in a purposefully mocking tone. Despite my doubt, I leaned in. Perhaps to get a better look at the lightbulb inside, or the other workings of the machinery. As goofy as it might be, mechanical things are still pretty fantastic to me whenever I see them. That sort of stuff just didn't exist when I was... younger.

"Yes, closer, closer. Peer deeply into it. Let the divination reveal to you, the truth." It said.

Sure enough, I saw it. A little circuit board with some colorful wires at the base. I made a note to learn how to build these sorts of contraptions.

"Wow. It's fake." I deadpanned.

"Kind of like you?"

Yeah, like me. What? That was not the machine talking. That was...

"Oh hey, Lily! Like my new look? Ghost in the shell! Deus ex machina! I just wanna be a real pony!"

I gaped at the animatronic. It didn't look any different, but that voice was unmistakable. Pompous, confident, annoyingly charming. It wasn't even coming from the voice box.

Leap Year. Again. My hooves flew to my face.

"Okay, I may have only gotten two hours of sleep last night, but I caught up on rest during the 'advanced apology analysis' seminar today. The past few nights have been free of you, so what in the hay is going on?" I said, wiping spit from my lip. This was so not the time for this.

"You were just getting your fortune told, duh. I think this nasty hunk-o-junk was about to feed you a line about a promising future with a handsome prince, but allow me- a real magician- to show you the real deal." The place where her horn would be shone with cerulean energy, firing off a beam into the glass orb, which gleamed like a star. Its corona shined around the room, shooting thin lines of light into the wallpaper, and bouncing between the points of the constellations.

"Quite a light show, for a hallucination." I muttered.

"It seems the stars have something divine to show you, Lily. Besides my presence, of course."

"What is it? Be quick about it, I have an important meeting soon."

"That you do."

One by one, every star in the sky winked out. The orb, once blindingly bright, was now only faintly pulsating with energy.

"This is what you have to look forward to if you keep messing up things up like you always do," said Leap Year. "I'll snatch you up, and take you to the end of time itself, where even the dust has ceased to exist. We'll sit and watch the very last star crush itself into nothing, until it's just you. And. Me."

The last light went out, and everything was black. Again.

I stood there for who knows how long, waiting in the dark to wake up. Vivid and terrifying waking dreams have a lot less impact when you're on the edge of making a move. Part of me wished that Leap Year really was there, so I could get my hooves on her and-

"Hello? Is anyone in here?"

Rafflesia. She made it. And I was awake, standing in the darkness.

The ambient noise of rainfall slowly returned to my perception, but the lights were still out. A tall figure stood in the doorway, framed by the moonlight.

"Rafflesia, I'm here. We're alone."

"Oh, Lily!" She took one step in and the animatronic burst to life, along with half the lights overhead.

"Welcome, traveller. You have come a long way to reach reach reach reach-" The machine buzzed and froze in place.

"What in the hay is this place, Lily? It's creepy." Rafflesia's eyes went wide as she surveyed the place.

"It's-"

"-the realm of Mystic Seance, greatest and most powerful oracle! What is it that you seeeee-" The last word glitched and warped into a high-pitched squeal, ending in a dry pop.

"Um, what he said." I gave the machine a dirty look, as if to dare it to speak up again. " The actual owner of this place only stops in once per day, in the morning. Nopony else ought to come in here, and if they do, this guy here will let us know right away."

"Knowledge it is, then. Come, peer into my crystal ball and you shall see all the knowledge that you-"

"Why don't we move to the back where it's quieter?" I suggested.

Rafflesia nodded and followed my lead. Her mane and coat were thoroughly soaked with rain, despite her "nonchalant disguise." Guess the disguise didn't include an umbrella.

We found a nice table normally used to read fortunes in tea leaves and tarot cards, as made evident by the tea set and tarot deck. There was no way to check if the cups were clean, so we settled for a tea-free chat. Sitting across from her, I noticed that the chair she sat on groaned under her weight. Good reminder not to make the earth pony angry.

"So. How's your week been?" I asked.

"Small talk? You serious? Can we just skip ahead? I've haven't slept this little in my life. The bits you gave me for a place to stay didn't last very long. Do you know how hard it is to be homeless in a city as posh as Canterlot? Laying low is impossible! Royal guards patrol the streets all the time, so I have to stay in alleys with all the dumpsters and rats and ugh. I just thank Celestia that this one boutique left a box of old clothes out one day or I would have frozen my tail off without something to sleep in. Not to mention having to walk past the rows and rows of three-hoof restaurants with the best cuisine in all of Equestria! Today I had to eat a pizza crust out of the trash. The trash! It was really good, but still." She scrunched up her face, winded from the rant.

"Wow, that's crazy." I said. "You were probably better off eating the pizza crust than the weird stuff they serve at those restaurants though. Except for The Tasty Treat. That place has a phenomenal curry vegetable stew with rich chunks of potato and-" I stopped when Rafflesia's stomach let out an earth-shaking grumble.

She actually blushed. How bashful. Even in times of immense, life-threatening distress, ponies will still ascribe to a sense of social mores. You never stop being vulnerable to embarrassment.

"In any case, let's get down to business." I said.