“Beaten, tortured, killed. Here. In Manehattan. Outside her own apartment building. Almost forty neighbors heard screaming. Nopony did anything. Nopony called guards. Some of them even watched. Do you understand? Some of them even watched. I knew what ponies were, then, behind all the evasions, all the self-deception. Ashamed for harmony, I went home. I took the remains of her unwanted dress... and made a face that I could bear to look at in the mirror.”

“Are you still reading that silly little comic?”

Spike looked up from his book at the alicorn and cleared his throat.

“Graphic novel.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Okay Spike. I'll indulge you.” She glanced back at the group of mares in the next room over. “Anyway, once the other me wakes up, I’ll need my crystals for magidecon, so...”

Spike pursed his lips and slipped a bookmark in place. Twilight had set up a mare’s night out with all the girls, including Sunset and the Twilight from through the mirror. There was some worry about the evil magic that had grown on the other side of the portal but Spike never particularly cared about the nitty gritty of magic corruption. The Elements of Harmony were always able to beat it in some form or another.

And besides, the sooner he helped the sooner he could get back to his comi- to his graphic novel, so rather than protest ‘just five more pages’, he shrugged and did as he was asked the first time.

“Okay,” he said, tucking the book under his arm. “Be right back.”

Spike then padded off through the castle, claws clicking on the smooth glassy crystal. He gave a dismissive wave of his claw at her thanks before he turned the corner. Sighing, he simply glanced down at the cover, at the smiley face with the tiny splash of... raspberry jam. At least, that’s what he told Twilight it was. She’d no doubt freak out if she knew what it really was.

Twilight freaking out was something he'd rather avoid, for obvious reasons. She was definitely more palatable when she was sane and not yelling at you. Not that she wasn't usually pleasant to be around. Most of the time. The sentiment was shared among everyone who was going to be there, and though it seemed there was fun to be had, he wasn’t particularly interested in hanging out with the girls.

There wasn’t anything particularly wrong with them, or their activities. Girly as they may be, there wasn’t exactly anything *wrong* with being girly. Inkblot Shock himself had a job making dresses, a detail that reminded him of Rarity. He also kept a diary. And anyway, fillies, mares, girls of any species, whatever, they were all great. He sometimes did need some time for manly things like Ogres & Oubliettes with Big Mac and Discord, but dressmaking and cupcake baking and getting treatments at the spa were all perfectly enjoyable in their own right too.

No, the problem wasn’t the gender of the ponies hanging out in the castle. The problem was their identities. Though to be more specific, just one.

His Twilight was great once you really got to know her as more than a neurotic mess obsessed with checklists and procedure. Rainbow Dash was certainly as awesome as she constantly claimed to be, and always had your back. Applejack was dependable, an unbreaking pillar of support who tells it like it is. Pinkie Pie was fun and funny and always good to have around when times were tough. Fluttershy was a bit quiet but one of the nicest ponies in all of Equestria. Rarity was amazing and wonderful and beautiful and perfect, obviously. Starlight had made a lot of progress from being the evil world destroyer she almost was, and was now quite pleasant company. Sunset was in the same boat. Trixie and Maud were a bit difficult at first but once you cracked their exteriors they would follow you to the ends of Equestria. They were all good friends to have by your side.

The problem came with... the other Twilight.

Now, there wasn’t anything wrong with Other Twilight. But... she was a significantly more awkward version of His Twilight, reminiscent of back when they lived in Canterlot. Spike imagined that if Other Twilight was put in a room with Moon Dancer circa a few years ago they would hit it off. That wasn’t a good thing. It was almost painful to be around her the few times he and His Twilight had crossed over to hang out for whatever reason.

She was always hiding in the corner, fiddling with her cellophane or whatever it was called, muttering and correcting grammar under her breath, staring off into space at random times. Her emotions seemed nonexistent, talking the same way happy as she did when she was upset. When she spoke it was often monotone and hard to hear. When you could hear it, sometimes she changed topics in a split second. And she didn’t even look at you when she did so. She was just... weird.

Spike shook his head of the thoughts; he’d arrived at the cabinet where the magidecon crystals were stored. Magical decontamination, as it was formally known, was a bit of a complicated and smelly process that basically amounted to making sure that dark magic wasn’t present, and expelling it into a quartz block if it was. When Sombra’s horn was discovered on the outskirts of the Crystal Empire it was encased in a cage of quartz in the Canterlot Archives for these properties.

Contrary to popular belief, there wasn't much pain or danger involved in the decontamination process provided a unicorn worth their salt would channel the excess energies properly. This was referred to as a lightning rod despite the lack of any actual electricity. It would definitely freak out the human Twilight, but to be honest Spike wouldn't be at all surprised by that. She seemed as nervous and antsy about things as either of the Fluttershys.

He palmed the chunk of quartz, stuck his book under that arm, and took the black velvet box in the other claw. Much as he wondered what they would taste like, these gems had special properties and were absolutely not to be eaten under any circumstances. He didn't remember the full nerdy explanation but basically they resonated with certain things and drew magic out that way. Or something.

The dragon did take a little peek inside. There sat six little crystals. They were colorless, onyx, milky white, cobalt, yellow, and a glowing tealish green. His tongue slipped out involuntarily for a second before he slapped the box closed. The yellow one smelled especially delicious, probably brimstone, but Spike wasn't really looking forward to being murdered by Twilight as these things were really rare and expensive.

He shut the cabinet with his tail and headed out of the room, only to almost walk into a dripping wet dragon with two fluffy pink towels wrapped around her hip and on top of her head.

“Uh...”

Spike tried but miserably failed to stifle a giggle. His face turned red and he began to guffaw, unable to cover his mouth with either of his full claws.

“Yeah yeah, laugh it up Spike,” Ember grumbled, crossing her arms in front of her chest and blushing. “These were the only ones in the bathroom...”

“Oh, I am so totally using this for blackmail!” Spike joked, catching his breath. “Imagine, the mighty and fearsome Dragon Lord takes bubble baths and wears pink!”

Ember’s eye twitched. “You're lucky I know you're kidding or else I'd burn you to a crisp.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, sure, ooookay,” he continued to tease as the pair walked through the hall. “We all know you love me too much to do so.”

An awkward silence settled.

“Platonically!” Spike cried, realizing his phrasing.

“That's not it,” she replied, thoughtfully glancing at the stained glass windows looking down at them. “It's just... huh.”

They continue to walk in a slightly less awkward silence for a short while.

“I don't know,” Ember finally continued. “We don't really have love at home. Platonic or otherwise. I'd be hard pressed to even say that I ever loved my dad growing up.”

“Wait... dragons don't love their parents?”

“No no no, it's not like that. It's just different. We imprint on our parents through our egg memories, you know? Imprinting is...” she placed her fist over her mouth in thought. “It's an instinct that we have that doesn't really have a pony comparison. You know how long it took me to get used to friendship. It's just not really something I can explain easily.”

“That makes sense...” Spike rolled her words around in his head for a little bit. “What are egg memories?”

Ember side-eyed him. “It's... the memories you have from inside your egg.” She turned fully to face him. “When our eggs are laid, we’re already developed enough to be able to feel the aura of our parents, so when we hatch we’re instantly drawn to them. It's purely a survival thing, since you'll die without them and if they don't keep you alive their genetic line ends. It's not because of the whole magic of friendship thing.”

“That's... cool. But sad.”

“I guess. But I was born in the culture so it's normal for me. Not so much for you. You know... I actually don't know anything about your parents.”

Spike shrugged. “Neither do I.”

After a second or two of walking, Spike realized he was alone. He looked behind him at the shocked expression on Ember’s face.

“What?” he asked.

“You... don't know anything about your parents?”

Spike merely shrugged again. “The way I see it, Twilight’s mom is my mom. Or Celestia. Or, heh, Twilight acts like my mom sometimes. And one day I’d like to call Rarity’s mom my mom, if you know what I mean.”

“...what about your sire?”

No response came.

“Spike, I...” Sigh. “I'm sorry I brought it up.”

“It's fine, I'm not upset about knowing who my real parents are anymore.” He smiled at her. “I’m just adopted, no big deal. Happens all the time here. I just...” the smile faded slightly. “I used to be really upset about it. But that's in the past. For right now, my family is my friends. Twilight, Rarity, the rest of the girls, Thorax... you... oh yeah, and the birds.”

The somber mood evaporated. “Birds?”

Spike cocked his head. “Yeah, Owlowiscious and Peewee.”

Ember blinked. “Those names mean nothing to me.”

Spike chuckled. “Right, you probably haven't met ‘em yet. Owlowiscious is our pet owl, and Peewee is a Phoenix I raised from a hatchling.”

Ember furrowed her brows. “...you have a pet owl?”

“Yeah, he's just...” Spike unfocused and stared at the wall as he racked his brains for the last time he saw the bird. “...huh.” Try as he might, the most recent time was a couple of years ago when Ponyville had the dream fight against Princess Luna’s Tantabus.

“Spike, there you are!” Twilight yelled, flustered, before catching the other dragon out of the corner of her eye and much more successfully covering a snicker. “I thought you got lost again. Hey Ember, you find everything okay?”

“I found the towels.” She grimaced. “Unfortunately.”

“Twilight,” Spike asked. “Where's Owlowiscious?”

Twilight blinked, returned to reality. “He's in the library with Alan. Why?”

“Who the heck is Alan?”

“The raven.”

“... We have a raven?”

“Never mind Alan, Spike, did you find the crystals?”

Spike tossed the little box towards her and hefted the quartz. “Yeah, no problem, Ember and I were just chatting. Sorry we were slow.”

“It's fine, Twilight’s still passed out, but Maud and Pinkie are here and they wanted to take a look at the set. What were you guys talking about?”

“Dragon culture, our parents. Other stuff.”

“Yeah,” Ember cut in. “That reminds me, I wanna chat with you in private about something later, Princess. And uh... what do you mean Twilight’s passed out?”

“Oh! The other me from the human world.”

“...I have several questions but the most important one will be what the heck is a human?”

“Well, I hope you girls have fun,” Spike said, stretching. “But I’m gonna head to the library and read... and say hi to the raven we apparently have now. Later!”

The two girls glanced after him before returning their gazes to each other.

“There's a magic mirror that leads to a different world where ponies are turned into non-magical simian creatures called humans and dragons are turned into dogs.”

Ember merely gaped at her. “...I have several more questions.”

“Long story short, there's copies of all of us through there, myself included, and my copy is here to hang out with us tonight.”

“Okay, yeah, I figured that out when you said that, but... dogs? Seriously?”

Twilight shrugged.

“Do... do dogs turn into dragons?”

“I... don't know,” Twilight said, filing away that she would have to ask Applejack to borrow Winona for an experiment in the future. “And I have a question for you in return.”

“Shoot.”

“Why do you have a towel on your head if you don't have any hair?”

/x/x/x/

“- and then Maud said, ‘apocalypse? I thought you said a rockfish!”

A rimshot went off somewhere.

“Yes,” a flat voice intoned. “I did say that.”

Sunset Shimmer had a fake grin to match the one on Starlight’s. “That's an... interesting story, Pinkie Pie. It's almost like I was there.”

This technically wasn't a lie. When the circumstances surrounding the event that the energetic pink earth pony had just described had happened to the energetic pink human who bore the same name just a few days ago, she was definitely present. However, unless there were significantly marked differences in the things that happened in the parallel universes, the story was full of a lot of embellishment.

However, she thought it prudent not to speak on that.

“And you know, it's just as funny the third time you told that story.” Starlight said, nervously laughing. This, too, technically was not a lie.

“Well duh, it's a classic!” Pinkie boasted, lovingly wrapping her hooves around the impassive Maud. “My big sister has got to be one of the funniest mares in all of Equestria, and I'm just lucky that she lets me tell the stories of her epic hilarity!”

“You do tell stories really well,” Maud added, tone not raising or lowering whatsoever as she spoke. “You really brighten things up in a way that I never would be able to. It's one of your many talents that I envy.”

“Aww,” Pinkie said, rolling her eyes and waving her hoof dismissively. “You're just saying that...”

Sunset could see movement out the corner of her eye. She turned her head to look at the lump of lavender sitting on a bedroll in the mirror room, who was now sitting up and rubbing her eyes.

“Twilight’s awake,” she said, turning to the cutie map and snatching the pair of glasses in her magic. Despite the mirror’s properties to only transfer magical objects, she had come through with glasses almost identical to the ones she wore back at home, just shaped for a pony rather than a human.

“Twilight was taking a nap at this hour?” Pinkie asked, incredulous. “Aw man, I didn't know it was do impressions of Rainbow Dash day, I could have sworn it was next month! My party senses have failed me!”

“No,” Starlight said, touching her hoof to Pinkie’s barrel. “Other Twilight.”

“Oooooohhhh!”

Maud blinked.

“Oh yeah, you haven't really been told yet...”

Sunset pushed past the exposition dump, glasses in tow, and pursed her lips as she took a closer look at her friend. The marks on her inner forelegs were hardly visible, but they still concerned her heavily, and explained a couple of things.

Twilight was gently patting the ground around her, apparently calm, but only the exterior. Her eyes were rapidly scanning her surroundings, or what little she probably could see without the lenses, and her breathing was very shallow and rapid.

“Sunset...?” she whimpered, practically inaudible, hooves reaching the cold crystal. “... where are you?”

“Hey,” Sunset cooed, placing a hoof on the side of Twilight’s muzzle. “I'm right here.”

Twilight quickly brought her own up to touch Sunset’s, and squinted her eyes. “I can't see you.”

“Here, don't move for a sec,” she uttered, unfolding the glasses and slipping them over Twilight’s eyes. “There, is that better?”

Twilight blinked a few times before her eyes widened as she took in Sunset’s form. She... well, she was definitely a horse. But she was also most definitely Sunset. That hair, those eyes, that smile.

“Yeah,” she breathed. “A lot better.”

“Good...” Sunset glanced over her shoulder at the trio of mares peeking in. “So uh... how are you feeling?”

Twilight tried to pull herself to her legs and wobbled slightly, but managed to stay fully upright. “A little weird...” she responded. “I hate not having my hands, first off. And all of my muscles are doing different things than I want them to. But I think I'll be okay with this for the... night...”

She suddenly seemed fearful of something, and her breathing sounded shallow.

“Twi, what's...” Sunset turned and glanced at Pinkie’s waving. Starlight facehoofed as Maud just stood there. “...oh.”

Probably just the new arrivals.

“Hey, come on,” Sunset motioned with her head, wrapping a hoof over Twilight’s back. “They're not gonna bite. You've met Starlight before, and this side’s Pinkie is just as nice as our Pinkie.”

Twilight very nearly shrunk back from the contact, but kept it together. She turned her head from the figure in a dark corner of the room to the mare giving her a gentle, encouraging smile. She put together what Sunset was getting at, and merely nodded. Might as well go along with it.

She nodded and let Sunset walk her over to the doorway. Upon arrival, the three mares stepped back and fell to their haunches, expectantly.

Sunset cleared her throat. “Twilight,” she proclaimed. “Starlight, Pinkie, Maud. Starlight, Pinkie, Maud, Twilight.”

Twilight gave a light wave, and Pinkie started to blush profusely.

“Awwww...” she muttered. “She's so cute!”

Twilight returned the blush in full as she mined putting a lock of hair behind her ear, except she didn't have hands, or ears in the same place, and her hair was all up, so she ultimately ended up just conking herself in the head and knocking her glasses askew.

“Whoa there,” Sunset warned, adjusting them with her magic. “Not used to that either, are you?”

“Ugh!” Twilight cried, gently rubbing the side of her face. “How do you ponies deal with these blocks at the ends of your arms?”

The four looked at each other for a moment before all simultaneously saying “Magic.”

“Unicorns use levitation, mostly,” Starlight explained. “And earth pony magic allows them to grip things with their hooves differently. You, uh...”

“As a unicorn your hooves aren't gonna be of much use,” Sunset continued. “Technically you should be able to use magic, but since you never have you probably won't be. Actually-” she turned to her saddlebag and pulled out a necklace with a violet crystal attached, draping it over Twilight’s neck.

Maud’s eyes imperceptibly widened. “Is that the other geode you mentioned?” she asked, sounding unexcited as could be.

“Whoa there, sis, calm down there! You're gonna scare her like that!”

“I apologize, but I am incredibly curious as to see this in action. I've never seen crystals with these properties.”

“I tested out mine earlier,” Sunset said. “It at least works the same way, but I’m not sure about yours.”

Twilight raised a brow. “On whom?”

Starlight raised her hoof. “I volunteered.”

“I know how to become an effective cult leader now, so there’s that.” Sunset winked at Starlight.

“Oh come on, that was one time!”

“We’re ba~ack!” Twilight cried with Ember in tow.

The five mares turned to face the Princess and the Lord, and Twilight’s breath hitched as her gaze zeroed in on the dragon.

“Hey, Twi, it’s cool, she’s-”

“A real life actual dragon...” she breathed. “You didn’t tell me there were going to be dragons!”

“What about Spike?”

“Spike doesn’t count.”

/x/x/x/

Spike laid down in his bean bag chair reading his book when suddenly he felt a sharp, stabbing sensation emanating from somewhere in his pride.

/x/x/x/

Ember glanced between the two Twilights. “Oh,” she muttered. “I see what you mean.”

“Oh, Twilight, you’re awake!” Twilight cried. “And I see you’ve met some of the other girls. This is wonderful!”

“Yeah, I’m sorry I kinda passed out,” Twilight said with a nervous chuckle. “But yes, I just got introduced to these girls. Or, um... mares. We haven’t had much opportunity to chat yet.”

“Well, that’s what we’re all here for!” Twilight exclaimed, adjusting her wings. “To make new friends and good memories!”

Pinkie looked between the two Twilights. “This is confusing, you both sound exactly alike.”

“At least Princess Twilight has wings,” Starlight said. “When the two of us crossed over it was so much harder to keep in mind that they were different Twilights. Rainbow and Sunset here had the bright idea of making them switch outfits for the sake of pranking me.”

“Oh my gosh!” Pinkie started cackling. “Classic Dashie!”

“That was certainly fun,” Twilight said, adjusting her glasses. Gentler this time. “I like being a part of the practical joke rather than on the receiving end of one.”

“Oooh, oooh, ooh, I wanna go next time!” Pinkie shouted, waving her hoof in the air. “Please can I go, Twilight!? I won’t tell everypony about Equestria!”

Sunset pursed her lips. It was hard enough to handle one Pinkie Pie, let alone two Pinkie Pies. And when Twilight told her about the incident with forty-five (or was it forty-six) Pinkie Pies, she had shuddered so hard she very nearly slipped a disk.

“Pinkie would probably really like that” Twilight said.

“Yes, I would really really like that!”

“No, the... the other Pinkie...”

Maud gently nodded her head. “How similar is the Pinkie from your world?”

“Better question,” Pinkie interjected, “is the Maud from your world just as cool and fun and awesome!?”

Twilight glanced at Sunset, who shrugged. She looked back and affirmed, “Yes.”

“Alright, girls!” Princess Twilight authoritatively stated. “I understand you’re all excited to meet and hang out with Twilight, and with Sunset, but may I ask all of you except for, well, anypony named Twilight, to take a few steps back please?”

Starlight and Maud shared a knowing glance before joining the rest of the group in the movement, leaving the center open with the two Twilights.

“Wh- what’s happening?” Twilight asked, despite knowing the answer. The back of her neck suddenly felt very hot, and she glanced back behind Sunset at the leering Midnight Sparkle standing behind her.

“It’s okay,” Sunset cautioned. “It’s called magical decontamination. You haven’t been here before so Princess Twilight’s just gonna run a quick spell on you to make sure there isn’t any residue of dark magic on you. You know, like with Gloriosa Daisy?”

Twilight nodded before swallowing, and turned her head back to face forward. Her pulse suddenly skyrocketed, and found she wasn’t getting enough air through her nostrils alone. She watched as the other Twilight levitated a black velvet box open, and six crystals of different colors came out, arranging them on the ground around her. She could distinctly smell ozone, sulfur, and garlic. In her peripheral vision she saw Starlight’s horn begin to glow.

Twilight then clenched her eyes shut, and waited for the end.

“It really is a shame...”

Twilight shook her head to either side as she focused her mind on her friends and family. Rarity. Cadance. Rainbow Dash. Spike. Fluttershy. Her Parents. Applejack. Shining Armor. Pinkie Pie. Sunset. She cycled through all of the images of things she did with all of them, holding onto the memories as a high pitched whine rang through the air.

Suddenly she felt something touch her chest, and she cried out in shock. Her eyes snapped open and she looked down at the tube of magical energy surging through her body, coming out her side and into Starlight’s horn, and she started to hyperventilate. Everything around her was glowing neon. The blurry images of all of the ponies and dragon sitting around her blended and faded together. The odor intensified.

Words started echoing in her head, but she couldn’t make out what they were saying. Hot tears pooled and streaked down her face, and Twilight’s difficulty breathing only got worse. Every muscle in her body collapsed, but she found she didn’t hit the floor, but was in fact suspended in the air. Her ears started ringing, threatening to overwhelm all of her other senses. Her vision started to go black.

“You’re going to die.”

In an instant, all of the stimulus died, and Twilight felt her body laid gently down on the ground. She blinked several times but couldn’t see anything. Her ears continued to ring, and she still smelled the disgusting blend of rotten eggs and rancid garlic. Breathing was not happening, as she was acutely and painfully aware of all the tubes in her throat and inner ears down her chest. She tasted blood.

Through it all, the tears continued to fall.

“...ot breathing, Twili...”

“..ver happened befo...”

“...ill crying, why the fu...”

Voices continued to echo, the ringing growing in intensity. She felt something pressing in on her side. Maybe. She couldn’t tell. Her tongue shifted. Everything was still dark. She heard shouting. Still couldn’t breathe. Midnight was laughing. This was it.

“Twilight,”

She recognized that voice, it was Sunset.

“Twilight, I need you to breathe.”

As if on command, her body cooperated. She felt a fleshy mass at the back of her throat move, and she gasped for breath. Her vision started to come back, but all she could see was yellow.

“This will all be over soon, okay?”

Twilight somewhere found the strength to nod, and she continued breathing as Sunset told her to do. She trusted her. She didn’t feel dead so she must not have died. If she was dead there was no way Sunset would be there too because Sunset had nothing to do with the process.

“There’s nothing to be afraid of, you’ll be fine.”

Twilight blinked again, and she could see a fuzzy outline that looked vaguely Sunset Shimmer-ish. The ringing was gone, and all she could hear was the encouraging voice. Her breathing returned to normal. Everything felt better. Her throat was still a little bit raw, though.

“How are you feeling?”

Twilight shifted her head and looked at the space around Sunset. She could see other figures, shadows, but only the outlines. No colors. Twilight blinked again and brought her vision back to Sunset. She licked her lips and tried to speak, but no words came out.

“Do you want to move from where you are?”

Twilight shook her head no to the best of her abilities. She didn’t want to leave, she wanted to stay right here with Sunset. Sunset meant safety. Safety was good. The black was bad.

“Someone get a glass of water. She’s out of the woods but her throat probably isn’t feeling too good. Hey, Twilight, you’re going to be okay. I’m right here, all right?”

Twilight nodded, and moved her hoof to wrap around Sunset’s. She could breathe again, and she couldn’t feel her lungs anymore, so that was probably good. Her memories started to reform as well.

“Hey, can you tell me the last thing you remember?”

“Glow...” Twilight tried to roll to her hands and knees, but she stumbled as soon as she remembered that she no longer had hands and knees to roll to. Warm, comforting arms wrapped around her. “Loud. Black. Midnight. Sulfur. Pony. Sunset.”

“That’s really good,” Sunset said, voice closer now. “Can you tell me if this has ever happened before?”

“No...” Twilight nuzzled closer into the protective blanket enclosing her, too warm and fuzzy to be arms. “Never before. Frightening. Thought I was dying...”

“You’re not dying, Twilight, you’re okay. I think you just had a panic attack from the shock of seeing the magic. It’s my fault, I’m the one who wanted Princess Twilight to do the spell.” The embrace tightened. “I’m so sorry...”

“It’s fine,” Twilight assuaged, pressing her muzzle deeper into what she deduced to be Sunset’s chest. “You didn’t know what would happen. I still love you... you should be mad at me.”

Flashes of the photographs on Twilight’s computer flashed through her mind before being buried by guilt.

“I could never be mad at you, Twilight. You haven’t done anything wrong. Oh, thanks. Twilight, Starlight brought a glass of water. Are you thirsty? Can you drink?”

Twilight gently nodded and allowed herself to be moved. A glass found its way to her mouth, and she started to sip. After a moment she brought a hoof up to tap the glass, sending it away. She blinked and scrunched her eyes.

“I can’t see.”

She felt familiar glasses frames slip behind her ears, and she blinked, vision having returned. Around her she could see the other mares with looks of concern etched on their faces. Princess Twilight especially looked incredibly guilty, crying as she placed a hoof against her mouth.

“What...” She shook her head. “What happened?”

The doors slammed open as Spike came running in.

“Twilight!” He cried, rushing to Princess Twilight’s side. “Are you okay? What happened? I heard you screaming!”

“...it wasn’t me...” Princess Twilight whispered before turning and running out of the room.

“Starlight!” Sunset commanded. “Go to her, I’ve got this.”

Starlight nodded and complied, rushing out after the Princess. Spike gave a look of contempt to Twilight before turning and following.

“...I was screaming?”

Sunset sighed. “You screwed your eyes shut and started crying, then you opened them and started to scream, yes. I think seeing the magic just put you in a state of shock. You gave off all the symptoms of panic attacks, so I just did what the psych textbooks at school say to do.” She gave one brief, weak chuckle. “And you call it soft science...”

Twilight wiped at the wet streaks on her facial fur. “My opinion on the science hasn’t changed, but... I respect your interest more now. ...thank you.”

“Of course, Twilight,” Sunset said, pulling her in for a hug. “I love you too, by the way.”

‘Oh shit, I did say that... hmm... maybe now more than ever is the best time to tell her.’

“Sunset... I-”

BOOM!

“Rainbow Dash has entered the building!” Exactly two seconds passed before- “Twilight? Where are your wings?”

/x/x/x/

“Twilight?” Starlight asked, nudging open the bathroom door. Inside, the purple alicorn princess was sobbing and hiding underneath her wings.

“How could I do that to her?” She whimpered.

“You didn’t know she was gonna flip out like that,” Starlight assured, sitting behind her and rubbing a hoof on her spine. “That was one hundred percent not your fault.”

“But-”

“But nothing. Sunset’s the one who asked you to do it, so if anything it’s her fault.”

“Sunset didn’t do anything wrong!” Twilight yelled, wings aflare.

Starlight remained impassive, merely nodding. “And neither did you. See?”

Twilight breathed heavily for a moment before sitting back down, wings drooping to the ground. “...I still feel so bad... I should have told her what it would look like...”

“She’s been through a lot of magical trauma, so I doubt telling her that would have made it any easier. But hey, look on the bright side. No dark magic. She’s totally fine!”

Twilight nodded, numb. “I guess... I just...” she sighed. “I just hate feeling so helpless when the ponies around me are hurt. I just... I froze. When Tempest came, when the Princesses went down, I just stood there and watched. I didn’t know they were still alive. I thought they were dead. And I just... I just froze. She would have got me too, but I was lucky enough to be saved.”

“Yeah, I know,” Starlight said, stepping closer. “You sent her a muffin basket. What does that have to with this?”

“What kind of princess am I if I can’t even help the ponies right in front of me?” She asked. “What would happen if there was another international crisis? What would happen if the Dreadstone terrorists came to Ponyville and it was up to me to save one of my friends and I froze at the last minute, and they di... they d...” Twilight shuddered as a fresh batch of tears began to fall. “I can’t just rely on my friends to save everypony for me. I don’t deserve these wings...”

“Oh, that’s a load of shit.”

Twilight blinked, unused to her friend’s vulgar language.

“What, you think that just because you freeze when there’s danger it means anything bad on your character? That it makes you weak, or helpless? No... it means you empathize so hard with the plights of others that it literally stops you in your tracks when they could be hurt. That doesn’t make you weak, Twilight. It means you have a strong heart.”

“But... but I... what if next time somepony dies because of me?”

Starlight shrugged. “Sometimes ponies die.”

Twilight gaped.

“Let me put it this way,” Starlight continued. “Let’s say somepony attacked me. It was sudden and it came from out of nowhere. You were in the room but it happened so fast that neither of us had any time to react, and they killed me. That isn’t your fault. My hypothetical assailant would be at fault there, for choosing to attack me.”

“What about something like a panic attack!” She volleyed.

“Then the panic attack was predetermined by destiny or whatever and you wouldn’t be able to do anything anyway. But the best you could do would be to read up on what to do if something like that happens and prepare for it accordingly. If Sunset hadn’t read up on that back at high school over on the other side of the mirror, she wouldn’t have been able to do anything, and Twilight would probably be in a worse place than she is right now. Or Twilight would have found the strength to pull through. Or any number of things would have happened. And if, Creator forbid, she did die from it, it would be no more your fault than Sunset’s fault, or even my own. You seem to forget that I was the lightning rod.”

Twilight simply kicked a hoof on the ground.

“Look, Twi...” Starlight came over and bent down so she could look her teacher in the eye. “I understand that you feel responsible. It’s a very strong feature of yours that I heavily admire and covet. But responsibility can go too far. Besides that fact, think of all the ponies you did save. You alone rescued your sister in law and stopped Chrysalis. You saved Stygian. You saved the entire Crystal Empire, and took part in saving it a different time. You saved Princess Luna. You saved Sunset. And... you saved me.”

A small smile came to Twilight’s lips at that.

“As for Tempest, you eventually stopped the Storm King. Right? Doesn’t matter that you were saved. If he’d have gotten you, well... I told you about how Discord and I hid out and were just about to execute our own plan when you guys showed up in a cake. But you were saved because you do so much good for the ponies of this town, and all across Equestria. You saved everyone from that mole rat slave trader, then you saved everyone from falling out of a zeppelin, and then because of how you helped out the pirates, they saved your flanks. You don’t need to be strong, you don’t need to be powerful. You’ve showed me time and time again that sometimes, all you need to save somepony’s life is to be their friend. It’s the greatest lesson I ever learned... and I was lucky enough to learn it firsthoof”

Twilight leaned forward into Starlight’s embrace.

“Thank you...”

“Any time, Princess...” Starlight said with a smile of her own. “I owe you a lot, so I’m only happy to return the favor. But, um... maybe we should go check and make sure the other Twilight’s okay first.”

“Oh my gosh!” Twilight cried, scrambling backwards and unfurling her wings. “You’re right! I’ve been so foolish, I can help more out there than crying in the bathroom!”

Starlight stepped back and waved her forward, following past the gust of wind left behind. When she left the bathroom, she encountered a very out-of-breath dragon.

“Did... Twi... light... just... leave... for... real?”

Starlight chuckled. “Come on, get up here,” she said, grabbing him with her magic. “I’ll teleport us back.” She heard no complaints and did such.

/x/x/x/

One hour later...

/x/x/x/

Rarity stepped into the cutie map room to quite a full house. The last to arrive, as was her custom, she managed to search out the room and identity the groups, at who was talking to whom. Rainbow Dash, in the air, was the first she spotted, who was hovering next to Ember and Fluttershy. Pinkie Pie was practically riding Maud, who was speaking to Starlight and Trixie. Applejack was embroiled in a conversation with Twilight, another unicorn she couldn’t quite recognize, and Twilight.

Wait a minute.

Rarity blinked a few times and glanced harder, confirming that she did indeed see two Twilight Sparkles. One sans wings. Maybe a time travel spell gone wrong, or another excursion to the mirror pool? Nonsense, both ideas were implausible and neither explained the glasses.

“Rarity!” the winged Twilight called, waving a hoof. Both of the other unicorns looked up and smiled. Rarity returned it and cantered over, waving at Fluttershy as she passed. When she finally arrived, Twilight wrapped a foreleg around her.

“Rarity, this is Sunset Shimmer, and Twilight Sparkle.”

“A pleasure,” she said with a gracious nod. “You must be the Sunset Shimmer from behind the crystal mirror, and...”

This other Twilight nervously giggled and blushed. “I’m the Twilight Sparkle from the human world,” she explained. “I’m actually really close friends with the other you.”

“Yeah, me too,” Sunset said. “It’s nice to see that this side’s Rarity is just as beautiful as the one that I know.” She winked.

Rarity blinked. She blinked again. And then she blushed profusely.

“Well now,” she managed to eak out, ignoring Applejack’s feeble attempts to hide her laughter. “It’s nice to see that you’re well versed in flattery. That silver tongue will definitely take you places.”

Sunset gave a weird look to the bespectacled Twilight, who rolled her eyes.

“Shut up...” she whispered. “You’re worse than Rainbow Dash when it comes to mares.”

Sunset bumped rumps with her, and the two nearly fell to the ground laughing.

“Wow, uh...” Applejack scratched the back of her head. “Maybe it was a mistake to bring the hard cider.”

Princess Twilight snapped her gaze to the farmer. “Wait, those were the hard ciders?”

Applejack raised a brow. “Uh... yeah. The soft cider is only sold once a year.”

A small ‘o’ of recognition formed on the princess’s face as she reevaluated her human-world friends’ markedly more sociable and boisterous behavior in a different light. “AJ, you realize these girls haven’t really drank any actual alcohol in years, and they’re just teenagers, and that’s 60 proof, right?”

Applejack shrugged. “I’ve been drinkin’ hard cider since I was Applebloom’s age. Ain’t like it’s illegal over there.”

“It IS illegal over there!”

Applejack slowly nodded. “Oh. Uh. I messed up.”

“It tastes just as good as the other Applejack’s cider...” Twilight nuzzled Sunset. “Maybe better.”

Sunset snickered. “I’m gonna tell AJ you said that.”

“You better not!”

“Yeah...” Applejack backed away slowly. “I’m just gonna have RD take the rest somewhere else...” And with that she left the conversation, only to be replaced by Starlight.

“Few too many?” She asked. “Hi Rarity.”

“They’ve only had one each,” Princess Twilight indicated. “They’re just more used to the human world’s drinks.”

“Hey Star,” Sunset said at rather than to her. “What say you and I... discuss friendship... upstairs?”

“ALL RIGHT!” Princess Twilight cried, grabbing Sunset’s ear with her magic. “You need some coffee and you need it now!” She dragged the winking Sunset out of the room, leaving a flushed Starlight, a flushed Rarity, and a very depressed Twilight.

“Hey sugarcube,” Applejack said, pushing through the other mares. “What’s gotcha down all of a sudden?”

Twilight sighed. “Wouldn’t you be sad if you were flirting with your crush but they thought you were just being friendly and then flirted with someone else right in front of you?”

“Uh...” Applejack adjusted her hat. “I don’t really have much experience with romance.”

Starlight pursed her lips. “Hey, Twilight, you haven’t seen the skies over Equestria, have you? Princess Luna decorates the stars in the most beautiful patterns, and I heard you were into astronomy.”

Her sadness dissipated as quickly as it came, replaced by the hopeful glint of knowledge. “That sounds fun!”

Starlight beamed at her before leading her off into the next room over, leaving Applejack and Rarity alone.

“Y’all sure took your sweet time gettin’ here,” Applejack teased. “What, didja come halfway to the castle then realize yer eyeshadow was the wrong shade?”

“At least I look good in the right shade of eyeshadow,” she volleyed back with a playful nudge. “But alas, it was merely a business venture. Sassy Saddles’ grandmother passed recently and her wake and funeral are scheduled for this weekend. I was putting together final preparations on my last orders. I’ll take care of them tomorrow so the day after I have no obligations prior to my train ride.”

“Y’all are goin’ a day early?”

“Wouldn’t you want support from your friends during those circumstances?”

Applejack pursed her lips. “Right. When Granny passes, I... I know I’d want y’all to be there for me.”

“And we will.”

The two mares hugged.

/x/x/x/

In the next room over, a very inebriated Sunset was drinking coffee straight out of the carafe as Twilight’s eyes bugged out of her skull. She was in huge danger of losing the title ‘fastest coffee drinker in Equestria’ but figured that it was worth sparing Starlight some public humiliation.

“There’s a time and a place, Sunset.”

She drained the last precious drops of bean nectar before slamming it down, cracking the glass. “Another!” she cried.

Twilight lifted the glass and cast a quick repair spell before slipping it back into the machine. “In a minute. Did you hear me?”

“Mmhmm, time and... relative dimension... in space. You are so pretty.”

“Ahaha, haha... you’re absolutely not that drunk.”

Sunset snickered. “I mean it. Both of you are great. If Twilight wasn’t a human, I’d totally get with her. She really likes me, you know? But human girls are just not sexy. They’re so unfuckable.” She frowned. “At least human guys have dicks. But they’re so small. I hate it, Twilight, I hate being so...” she snickered again. “Ehehe, it’s funny because unicorns have horns.”

Twilight sighed before stepping over and wrapping a hoof around her drunk friend’s shoulders. “I can’t say empathise, but I can sympathise. And need I remind you that my offer still stands to set you up with a long distance relationship if you just say the word?”

Sunset nodded. “I know but... it would be best if I don't.” She slumped her head over the countertop and started tracing the patterns with her hoof. “It's not that I wanna be alone... but I should get a full handle on friendship before I tackle romance. You know?”

“I understand,” Twilight said, wrapping a wing around her. “So why are you flirting with Starlight?”

She shrugged. “We fucked before. I was hoping maybe we could again.”

Silence.

“Oh!” Twilight cried in surprise. “That makes sense. I was not aware of that... well... once everypony goes home and the castle’s empty, you might have a chance then...”

Sunset gave a weak chuckle. “Hopefully...”

The coffee machine buzzed, the heat-activated sonic resonance of the crystals indicating that the pot was finished brewing. Twilight turned and brought the glass case to Sunset’s hoof. She glanced at it, grabbed it with her magic, and attempted to chug, but found nothing was coming out.

“Twiiiiiliiiiight... it's broken...”

“It's too hot!”

“... you're too hot.”

“SUNSET!”

/x/x/x/

Above them in the observatory, Twilight ooh’d and aah’d at all of the astrological implements scattered about the room. It put her own telescope to absolute shame, and the had one of the highest end ones on the market for anybody who wasn't NASA.

“Eeheeheehee...” she gleefully muttered. “This is just marvelous... can I live here?”

“Well, I’m sure you could stay the night here if you want to. Living here will be complicated. Won't you miss your family?”

Twilight shrugged. “I can always visit them.”

“Your friends will miss you.”

“...will they?”

Starlight froze. Those two words were full of more pain than any she had heard in a long, long time.

“Twilight?”

“Hmm?”

The natural born unicorn stepped towards the displaced human and fell to her haunches.

“Twilight. Can you look at me for a second?”

She complied, if begrudgingly.

“If your human friends are anything like the pony friends I've made here, I know for a fact that they would miss you. And from what I've seen and heard, they're all pretty similar. Wouldn't you agree?”

Twilight shrugged.

Starlight brought her foreleg up and placed it around the sad, drunk unicorn’s shoulders. “We’ll put a pin in that, then. But I'm gonna ask you something else. When Sunset said what she said to me, it looked like she just bragged about kicking Spike. Can I make a guess as to why?”

Twilight sighed. “Because I love her and stuff but she only has eyes for mares.”

“Wow, I was... right on the money.”

“It's fine, she doesn't have to like me back... I just need to get over this stupid crush.”

“How long have you liked Sunset for?”

“Since she saved me from Midnight.”

Starlight pursed her lips at that. That was a little longer than since the other Twilight saved her. Three years plus change. Quite a long time for it to just be a little crush. Nearly Spike levels of devotion, it was.

“How long have you liked her for?” She asked, striking the pink unicorn completely by surprise.

“Uh... well...” this was awkward. “Truth is, I don't like her like her like that. I mean, she's cute and she knows her way around my- well, let's just say that she's really good and knows what she’s doing and I totally enjoy casual- alright look.” She inhaled. “What we have is purely a physical thing. We don't love each other. She just...” and sighed.

Twilight placed her head on her hooves, awkwardly putting her rear legs to either side. Clearly she would need to be put through some basic etiquette training because her- wait a minute.

“Okay, I got it!” Starlight cried. “Sunset and I have this thing going where I can affirm her as a mare. She needs that from somepony and I'm more than willing to offer it. I'm sure you know what it's like to be in the wrong body, in a couple ways. Imagine if you were in a situation where nopony saw you as, say, a girl, and Sunset wasn’t able to help you feel like one.”

Twilight grunted.

“You two have more in common than I think you realize sometimes. I get how you're feeling, kind of. My friend, Sunburst, I really wanted to rekindle our friendship after it had effectively died. But it seemed to me like he was better friends with all of my other friends.”

“You're getting way too relatable, Star...”

“That's the point. Would you think it was fair if Sunset held it against whoever you had to affirm your identity because you didn't spend that time with Sunset? Would you be upset with your other friends if they spent more time with Sunset than you did?”

Twilight sighed. “I'd be upset but not at them...”

“Okay. So... what's the problem here?”

Twilight groaned and rolled over. “I like Sunset but I also like Rainbow and Rarity and Fluttershy, and I kinda like Pinkie and Applejack too. But they all have other people. Sunset has you, Rainbow has every gay girl in the district, Rarity has boyfriends, Fluttershy has her special friend and Sunset, Pinkie has everybody, and Applejack... I don't know, we don't even get to talk much because we have nothing in common. ‘Hey, Applejack, wanna talk about quantum entanglement theory?’ ‘Well gee Twilight, I’d love to, but I don't know the first thing about quanti-watchamacallit, do you wanna talk about apples instead?’”

“Applejack has other interests.”

“I know! And I don't wanna be mean... but I just don't know how to have a normal conversation with her, or with anybody. I only know how to infodump about science and ramble on for hours about my special interests and complain about how shitty and terrible my life is and how gay I am. I never learned how to talk to people like a normal girl!”

Starlight couldn't help but let a chuckle escape. “You're preaching to the choir here, Twi. All I knew was how to enslave ponies to do my bidding and steal a time travel spell. I once brainwashed all of the girls so I could hang out with all of them at the same time more easily. I'll never forget the earful Twilight gave me for that one... but I understand what it's like to feel like an outcast. Like nopony understands you. Like the only pony who’d ever wanna hang out with you is the person obligated to reform you because it’s their duty. But you gotta believe me when I say that there’s always ponies out there who will enjoy spending time with you. You just gotta find your Trixie.”

“But I want Sunset to be my Trixie...”

The sober unicorn grimaced before glancing out the window. This clearly wasn’t working. What could she do? Twilight was clearly depressed, that much was certain. She has a whole dearth of other issues to boot, not least of which she was probably autistic too, since she had mentioned special interests in the context she did. Sunset told her an overview, so there was definitely some social isolation. There had to be something else too, some final puzzle piece that would tell her exactly what she would need to say to get Twilight out of this funk, but she just couldn’t see it.

“Look...” She said, laying down next to Twilight and facing up at the ceiling. “I wanna say what you wanna hear and make you feel happy, but I can’t. Tough love seems to be my specialty, heh. But sometimes we can’t have what we want. Sunset isn’t going to be your Trixie. Sunset is your Twilight. She’s the one who pulled you out of the pit, and it would be asking too much of her to expect her to be your shepherd too. What you have with her now, a close friendship with somepony who cares so much about you but maybe not in the way you want her to... sometimes you just gotta take the silver lining and run. She’s a good friend. That should be enough.” She turned her head to see that Twilight was crying again.

“I know...” she croaked. “I know that I should be happy for what I have. But... all these thoughts in my head tell me it’s not enough. That I’m not enough. That I don’t deserve them as friends. That they deserve better than me. I want to be happy with them. I want to be happy having them as friends. I’m just... not. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know how to fix it. I don’t know how to not hate myself because I can’t figure out something as simple as getting over a stupid crush. I’m smarter than this, I should know what to do...”

“Hey.”

Twilight turned to meet Starlight’s warm, compassionate eyes.

“You ARE enough. You’re more than enough. Fact you were born means you deserve to be happy. What’s the worst you did, got curious about magic and had it swallow you? Please. Nothing bad you ever did or could have done is nearly as bad as what I did, or even what Sunset herself did. And we deserve happiness, and we got it. Right? You’re in the same boat. You deserve it too. You do deserve to be happy, and have friends, and they deserve to have you in their lives, because I’m sure you enrich them.”

Twilight merely bit her lip. Maybe what she did to Sunset wasn’t as bad as enslaving her and turning her into a zombie, but it was still bad. Still, Starlight did have a point. Logic prevailed over emotion yet again. Her brain was merely swimming in a hormonal soup and affecting her judgment. Yes, that was clearly the problem. Teenage hormones. She vowed to go delete those pictures as soon as she got home, and move on from there.

“Thank you...”

“It’s no problem at all, Twilight. Now come on, let’s get back to everyone else. I ordered cupcakes and they should be in soon.” She rolled to her hooves and outstretched one leg. “Once you and Sunset are sober again we should be heading out. You okay to walk?”

Twilight took the outstretched leg and after a moment of flailing hit solid ground. She was feeling less tipsy by now. “Yeah... thanks for talking to me.”

“You’re a lot of fun to hang out with, Twilight.” Starlight flashed a smile. “One day, when you find your Trixie, she’s going to appreciate the heck out of you. And remember, just because Sunset and I have a physical relationship that goes beyond friendship, doesn’t mean that what you two have is any less important or valuable, okay?”

Twilight nodded. “...okay.”

“Good. And, uh, don’t worry, I’ll definitely teach you how to use this thing later tonight. I did kinda lead you here under false pretenses.”

“That’s fine, you did what you had to do to get me in better spirits. And... I appreciate that.”

“No problem. Now let’s get a cupcake before Pinkie eats them all.”

“Wow, the counterparts really are similar...”

/x/x/x/

“Okay Soarin, everything’s cool. Everything’s fine. No big deal. These things happen. He’s not gonna shoot the messenger or anything, no, he’s gonna take it pretty well. We got stuff put in place for this kinda situation. Zebranda’s still gonna be safe, it’s chill. It’s not my fault it wasn’t done right. It was totally that hippogriff’s fault, one hundred and twenty percent. Heh, listen to me, sounding like Crash. No! Focus! Get in there, let him know, get out, get back to practice, no big deal. Everything’s fine. Everything’s cool.”

“You gonna stand outside my office all day, first lieutenant?”

Soarin gulped before pushing the door open.

“Hey... boss...”

A large and imposing wooden desk sat in the center of the room. The walls were covered in boxes of medals, framed certificates, and multiple armor stands with uniforms behind walls of glass. A nameplate reading ‘Champagne Corkscrew’ sat at the front of the desk, and behind it was a mean looking pegasus with a scar under his left eye. His auburn hair buzzed military style sat perfectly even atop his pale brown coat, adorned in the standard uniform for the Equestrian Air Force. His hooves were clopped together, covering his mouth as he hunched over in his chair and glared at the wall.

“What do you have for me?”

Soarin nervously adjusted the clipboard in his wing towards his open hoof, and he slowly hovered towards the desk. He could see the blue officer’s uniform freshly pressed, pins attached freshly polished. Champagne was very particular about his physical appearance, and was absolutely obsessed with order. Soarin was suddenly made acutely aware of the fact that his collar was slightly off kilter, and sweat beaded on his forehead.

“I, uh... have the mission results from the Zambezi incident.”

He slipped the clipboard onto the desk, sliding it towards the Lieutenant Colonel, as the silver oak leaf pinned to his shoulder attested to. The solitary silver bar pinned to Soarin’s own shoulder paled in comparison to it, quivering under the higher rank. The Wonderbolt darted his eyes around the room, seeking out escape options for when the boss went nuclear. After all, the mushroom cloud cutie mark was very fitting for his temper.

It was only then that Champagne looked anywhere but the far wall, and quickly scanned the report. He was methodical and slow, and when he finally finished, he resumed the glare. He placed his hooves on the table, and pressed in, pushing his entire body back to proper posture. Soarin swallowed again as he prepared for the tongue lashing of a lifetime.

“Well, this is unfortunate. Mission failure.”

Oh hey, that was actually pretty mild-

Champagne slid everything from his desk onto the floor, wings flaring. “WHEN I GET MY HOOVES ON THAT MISERABLE FAILURE OF AN ASSASSIN I’M GONNA FIND A WAY TO TURN HIS FACE EVEN MORE BLUE!”

“Boss-”

“Put out an APB on Krill. That dumb son of a bitch will just about cost me my job, and I refuse to have my ass chewed for his fuckup. Now YOU, first lieutenant, are gonna tell your captain that you’ll be taking a break from your fancy flying tricks until this hippogriff is dead, do you hear me? D E A D dead! I want him in a body bag by tomorrow sundown, am I clear!?”

“Sir, yes sir!” Soarin chanted, snapping a salute. Well, he figured, at least Thunderlane wouldn’t be bored tomorrow. He’ll be stoked to hear that. Of course, he won’t be as stoked to hear that it’s because Soarin himself suddenly got stricken with a horrible case of the feather flu.

“Now get out of my office unless you feel like organizing my desk.”

He didn’t even need to finish his sentence before he found himself in solitude.

“Well this sucks...” Soarin muttered as he dejectedly flapped his way to the front desk. “APB on Krill,” he said to the unicorn on desk ops. “LC Cork’s orders.”

The mare sighed and flipped her long pink hair. In a heavy Prench accent, she spoke. “So ze hippogriff has failed, I take it.” She then took a bite of salad.

Soarin shrugged. “Yeah, Fleur, I guess he has. You know, can I ask you how smart it is to put out a hit on an ultranationalist hippogriff with terrorist ties and his claws on the most powerful weapon in all of Equestria?”

“You are not paid to ask questions. You are paid to keep your mouth shut.”

“Fair point... can you pen a message to Spits?”

“You are terribly sick with ze feather flu and cannot make it to ze Wonderbolts practise.”

He clopped the table twice. “You’re the mare, Fleur! I owe you. How about coffee this friday?”

“I don’t drink coffee,” she said, taking a sip of coffee.

“Worth a shot...” he said, only a small amount of dejection showing through. “Well, I’m off to do some paperwork, I’ll leave you to your work.”

“Yes. You will.” She took another bite of her salad, watching as he flew away. “...flyboy...” a small smile graced her lips.

Just another day in the Equestrian Black Ops.

/x/x/x/

Author's Note

(edit- this is not fully an official chapter of this fic: it's a chapter of another fic, The Dragonbourne Identity, that just so happens to take place at the same time with the same characters. apologies for the confusion!)

Here it is, the fateful branch chapter. Not only is this chapter the next instance in TFW, it is also the jumping off point for a separate fic, The Dragonbourne Identity. It follows the events that occur in Equestria during the rest of TFW. You'll understand why in the final chapter. You don't have to read The Dragonbourne Identity to continue to enjoy this fic. However, its eventual sequel The Dragonbourne Supremacy is a sequel to this fic as well, and this fic is suggested reading for that fic. They are an homage to the Jason Bourne films. If you are interested in the plot arcs brought up, [here] is a link to it.

Watchmen references abound. The views expressed by Spike the Dragon do not indicate the views expressed by the author. A cookie will be awarded to whoever guesses what the magidecon crystals represent. I love Ember. I love Maud. No, Twinkie shippers, Pinkie Pie is not flirting with Twilight. RIP Spike's pride. If y'all want I'll make a oneshot about when the Twilights swapped. Featuring Rainbow 'Cockblocker' Dash. Oh yes, the movie is canon, it's official, and YOU get PTSD and YOU get PTSD and YOU get PTSD! Drunk Sunset is about as much of a lesbian as sober me. Applejack's applejack is applejacked. No, Granny Smith is not going to die. Sunset is a giant nerd who watches too many human movies and shows. I love Starlight, the Twilight whisperer. FLEURIN! FLEURIN! FLEURIN!

Sorry about the delay, I hope the extra length makes up for it. I know I said in my blog that I wasn't gonna be done until Friday but here we are. I won't publish TDI now probably (plus I think it goes against moderation rules but I'll reread them) but it's a fairly good time for exposure right now. I'll make an addendum in the blog. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Don't worry, the next will detail the nights for Twilight and Sunset, Rainbow and Applejack, Pinkie and Rarity, Fluttershy and Tree Hugger, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, Shining and Cadance. No clop, jfc get y'all's minds out of the gutter :P