Pain was all I felt. The mental agony was strong, too strong for me to combat and get rid of. The scars I gave myself eased my pain, but it didn't ease all of my pain. I was angry at myself for failing at friendship. I knew that Twilight would have hated me if she knew.
You're a failure, Starlight. My thoughts ate up at me and I cried myself to sleep for the 30th time. I was hurt mentally and physically. My scars ached as I poorly stitched them. I refused to see a doctor. I didn't want anyone knowing about this. But, the pain only increased as I whimpered and cried. I wanted my pain to end, but I knew that I would have to see Twilight soon. She probably thinks that I'm worthless. I fell asleep, ready to face Twilight and the others the next day. The day was hopefully happy.
The next day was surprising. Twilight was worried about me. "I haven't heard from you in ages. I thought something was wrong. I'm so glad you're alright!" Twilight tearfully cried, hugging me tightly. My scars cried out from the pain, but I didn't care about them. I felt blood trickling down and I reacted in a calm way.
"I'm sorry, but you're hugging me too tight." I replied calmly. Twilight released me immediately. I knew she wouldn't see through my eyes. My soul was damaged. Princess Luna probably knew about my recurring nightmares, but I drug myself to sleep nicely at night. It was only twice however, so she probably thinks that they are over. I didn't care about me anymore, I cared about my scars and how it was great to ease my pain. Tonight will be the night. I thought with nothing running through my body. Twilight and the others talked about their days and I talked about mine with lies with between them. I was Trixie and I immediately felt something. It was regret. I didn't want to leave my friends alone, but it was better if I was gone. I decided to spend the day with Trixie to help ease my guilt. But, spending the day with her still didn't ease my guilt as I thought it would. Trixie didn't speak much, which was very surprising. I guess she knew that I needed the peace and quiet.
Trixie broke the silence soon, however. "I'm sorry about everything." Trixie tells me. At first, I didn't understand, but then I did. She was apologizing about making me very angry to leak magic out of my horn, making me cry, just everything that went wrong in our friendship. However, I was the one who was supposed to be apologizing to her. I thought she was mocking me, but then, I realized that Trixie would never do that to me. Sure, she'll do that to other ponies, but not once had she ever done it to me.
"You don't need to apologize. I need to apologize to you, Trixie. You were the greatest best friend a mare like me could ever ask for. You don't deserve me as your best friend, Trixie." After that, everything went silent. Hell, I couldn't even hear my own thoughts at the moment.
After we separated, my thoughts came back to abuse me. Wow, she probably hates you. Yeah, she should have just spit in your face and call it a day. No one cares about you, Starlight. You were never a good pony. Maybe you go back to ruling your village or maybe let them kill you. My thoughts were on a rampage and I didn't bother stopping them. I just let them come.
I dragged myself home. Home was where no one could bother me. Home was where my thoughts were free to roam. Home was the Everfree Forest. I used the last of my strength to curl up to sleep. When I regain my strength, death will come happily. I had thought. Your death would be forgettable. Princess Twilight probably already forgot about you, regardless of you wanting death or not. Her being worried was fake and you fell for the trap. My thoughts went in another direction again. I sighed and I closed my eyes, waiting to fall into a nightmare and fall into a nightmare I did.
Nightmare
I was running away from the ponies that called themselves my friends. Twilight had caught me first and she bared her fangs to bite me in my neck. I screamed as the pain started to increase. Fluttershy bit into the other side of my neck. The pain kept on increasing. Applejack stabbed me in a thigh with a shovel. Pinkie Pie just watched giggling madly.
All of this pain did nothing but ease my. My friends were my enemies and I liked it that way. I laughed along with Pinkie Pie and my "tormentors" just looked at me like I was crazy. "Do more to me!" I had shouted at them. They simply just shrugged as Rarity came by to painfully rip off my Cutie Mark. I was now a blank flank. Pinkie Pie held a knife and I continued my insane laughter. Pinkie Pie was still laughing as well. Everypony started laughing along with me and Pinkie Pie.
"Happy Death to you, Starlight." Pinkie Pie says, cutting my head off, executing me.
Nightmare Ends
I woke up screaming. With my strength returned, I had leaped on my hooves to avoid anypony and any animal from attacking me. I sighed and I took out of a very sharp knife that looks like the one that Nightmare Pinkie Pie used. I didn't dwell on the nightmare, I just started what I wanted to do in the first place. My knife went into my flank and I cut into my Cutie Mark and the pain made me happy. I started cut it off and when I did, a lot of flesh came out along with my Cutie Mark. I grinned. I was now a blank flank. But another emotion had crept up in my being. I didn't know it was, though so I ignored it. I stabbed myself over and over again, causing blood to splash out on the ground. I hope Zecora doesn't find me doing this. She will panic. I thought as I realized this, but it was too late for me to move, so I just continued doing what I was doing. When I was done, I set the knife to my throat.
"Goodbye, everyone." These were my final words before everything went black.
Author's Note
This is the end of The Death of Starlight! This was going to be a two chapter story anyway, but it will have a sequel about the reactions of Twilight and the others. I hope you all have enjoyed the story.
