Chapters That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
It was good to relax. It was good to take the night off, get together with friends and have a slumber party. Applejack’s barn was commandeered for this event, and a throne of hay was erected to exalt their host at Pinkie’s insistence. From there, Applejack presided over her court of six. To her left, Rarity came complete with a lacy, see-through nightie that would give Spike a stroke in both of his little hearts. She also brought her fainting couch because of course she did .
Further around the clock, past a sizeable gap around 4:30, Pinkie moved to sit opposite of Applejack in Gummi-themed footie pajamas. Twilight had neither special clothes or seat, feeling slightly underdressed. 10:30, Rainbow lounged on a cloud in her robes and Tank slippers.
“So, Twi’, where’s Starlight?” Rainbow asked.
Twilight tilted her head. “Well, Sunburst came down from the Crystal Empire, so she and Trixie are with him in the castle studying.”
Rainbow mulled that one for all of a split second before leering. “Oh, I bet they’re just studying .”
They were, actually, although Trixie’s thoughts had been along the same lines as Rainbow, she hadn’t counted on being with two big nerds.
Twilight was about to ask what that meant when Pinkie spoke up, “Guys, guys! We still got a few moments before Fluttershy gets back.”
Rarity looked at her, her eyes narrowing. “The outfit I made for her isn’t much more complex than the one I made for you, Pinkie Pie. What could be taking her so long?”
“Oh, she put on the wrong bunny outfit.”
“The wrong bun- oh no.”
“Oh yeah! So I got to see Fluttershy strut around in a bunny suit for a few moments.” Pinkie pulled her hair straight, covering one eye and pitching her voice to a stutter. “Um, are you sure these are the pajamas Rarity made for me? It’s awfully tight-” Pinkieshy turned around and shook her flank. “-especially here in the back.”
Rarity was mortified. Applejack was dumbfounded. Twilight desperately pushed her wings down. Rainbow Dash convulsed. “Ohmygosh ohmygosh aaaaa-” She raised her head up from the laughter, tears in her eyes. “And you got to see all that, Pinkie?”
“Yep! Especially the way it rode right up her behind,” Pinkie said.
“Nnnnnnice .”
“Alrighty, so, before she gets back, let’s have a lewd conversation about Fluttershy! C’mon, conversation prompts!”
Rarity pressed her hooves into her face. “Yes, exactly, this is precisely the conversation we need to have right now.”
“Ah, don’t be a prude, Rarity!” Pinkie chided. “We all wanna talk about Fluttershy’s patootie except we don’t wanna embarrass her, so right now is the perfect time! Rainbow, you in?”
Rainbow took a look at the strong shade of red Applejack was and grinned at Pinkie. “Heck yeah, I am!”
Applejack’s hooves slammed down on her throne’s forerests. Being made of hay, this wasn’t very dramatic. “Nope! I’m callin’ a moratorium on this topic right now!”
“Ah, c’mon, ‘Jack, don’t be a prude!”
Applejack jabbed a hoof her way. “Nope! My barn, my rules! There’s be no ‘patootie’ talk in this here barn. Right, Pinkie?”
Pinkie shrugged. “Yeah alright.”
“Dang it, Pi-” Applejack paused, stared ahead for a moment, closed her eyes for another and then sighed. “Really?”
“Yep! Your barn, your rules!”
Applejack lowered her head. “Oh.”
Pinkie stared with coy, half-lidded eyes. “Did you wanna keep talking about Fluttershy’s heiny?”
“I just thought you’d keep carrying on like nothin’.”
Rainbow Dash shrugged with a grin. “Alright, if we’re feeding Applejack’s secret Flutterlust-”
“Rainbow, I will bury you in the west orchard, with the rest of the bodies .”
“-then lemme talk about my fantasy plan of bringing Fluttershy to a Wonderbolt show and- pause for effect -putting her in a cheerleader outfit.”
“Are we absolutely sure you tellin’ us you only like the colts is to cover up yer secret Flutterlust?”
“There is nothing secret about my Flutterlust, everypony has a Flutterlust. Have you seen Fluttershy? I mean, dang, her and Braeburn are like that, ya know?”
“As a matter of fact, I don’t know that about my cousin .”
“Yeah, I guess you’re not supposed to stick your quill in the family ink pot.”
“Oh my gosh what .”
Rarity looked bashfully towards Rainbow Dash. “Champ , that’s not exactly how that phrase works.”
“West orchard, Rainbow Dash, I swear to destiny, I will,” Applejack said with narrowed eyes.
“Whatever.” Rainbow waved them both off. “Okay, so, I get Fluttershy up in the air at halftime and- and give Braeburn some wings, Twilight could do that. And so they’re up there in cheerleader outfits then Spectacle comes on, like the remix, yeah, and then booty shaking .”
Pinkie snorted, looking between Rainbow Dash and Twilight’s blank mortified blushing. Rarity shook her head with bemusement. “Really, it pains me I’m not shocked by this anymore.” And Applejack was shaking and growling, forelegs posed such if she had hands they’d be clawed.
“Booty booty booty .”
“What booty?” Fluttershy asked.
Heads spun around towards the barn door as a pretty pony pegasus in a white bunny onesie stepped on in. All of her friends stared directly at her and she sighed as exasperation and realization struck her. “Girls , are you talking about my butt again?”
“Wha!? Nah, ‘Shy, nah!” “Of course not!” “No , darling, dearest!” “Eeyup.” “Noper- oh, okay, Applejack. Then yep yep yep!”
“Dangit, Applejack!” Rainbow Dash yelped.
“What? She ain’t stupid, Rainbow.”
Pinkie jabbed a hoof to her left. “Twilight did it!” She snorted, covering her mouth as Twilight glared at her. “Sorry, no, yeah, it was me, I started the tushy talk. But what a tushy too.”
Fluttershy took her seat in the empty spot. Sitting that talked about tush on the ground, she kicked her front legs some, resigned in defeat. “It’s okay if you talk about my butt.”
Twilight put her hoof down. “No-”
“If you really want to.”
“No. We can literally talk about anything else.”
Rarity huffed on top her couch, flipping her mane. “If we must talk about something embarrassing, I volunteer myself.” She made a dramatic gesture of it, offering herself as tribute.
Rainbow Dash snorted, giving Rarity a dubious look. “Wha? You just want us to talk about your tush now, huh?” She jabbed her hoof accusingly. “That won’t embarrass you, you’ll love it!”
Rarity harrumphed, a step above mere huffing, turning her nose up at such a base accusation. She most certainly was not fishing for compliments.
“Although, it’s a nice tush.” Pinkie leaned to one side to try to get a better look.
Applejack nodded sagely. “Eeyup.”
Twilight raised a hoof. “Very well maintained.”
“She puts a lot of work into it,” Fluttershy told her.
Rainbow Dash pressed her forehead, closing her eyes. “Ya know what? No . Let’s talk about the weird nicknames you gave us all.”
“I don’t know, champ, it seems everypony but you is interested in my figure.”
Pinkie leered with an exaggerated lecherous grin. “Mostly just that marshmallow tush.”
Rarity seemed to take for the compliment it was, preening and giving her back end a little wiggle. “Indeed.” She deflates a little out of respect. “But, if you’d rather not, champ.” She smacks her lips as if tasting the word. “I don’t think ‘champ’ is quite working for casual use. Pinkie, honeybuns, would you mind if I borrow ‘Dashie’ from you?”
Pinkie curled and giggled into her hooves. “Go for it, marshmallow!” She waved a dismissive hood. “I mean, it’s not really my pet name for her anyway.”
“But I like champ,” Rainbow Dash said, frowning.
“Aw, dat’s adorable!” Applejack gives Rainbow a half-lidded look of mockery.
Rarity smirks at her. “Why, yes it is, sugarcube ,” She says, fluttering her eyelashes. In response, the farm pony cringes and blushes. She chuckled and Rarity giggles in satisfaction before turning to Rainbow again. “Then champ it is, Dashie-champ.”
Rainbow Dash snorted at Applejack’s come-uppance before pressing the question. “So, what’s up with the cutesy nicknames anyway?”
Rarity reclines on her back, spread out and drawing a whole lot of red-faced attention from most every other pony down her form. Only Rainbow Dash looked determinedly bored at her face as she waves her hoof. “There’s not much to say. I’m rather fond of you all and invented, as you say, cutesy nicknames for you all. A little bit more than dear or darling . What else is there to say?”
“I dunno. It’s not like the- hold on.” Something actually occurred to Rainbow and she peers across the circle the other way. “Pinkie, what do you mean your pet name for me?”
Everypony else was trying to paint Rarity like a Prench filly with their eyes but Pinkie was quite willing to let whimsy draw her away. She looked to Rainbow and happily explained. “For me, you’re ‘cupcake’.
That sounded extremely wrong, though Dash couldn’t quite put her hoof on- “Why? ”
“Well, ever since that Nightmare Night where I nearly got lynched, I just kept calling you cupcake in my head.”
Applejack jerked out strange fantasies involving steam carriages on a boat to actually remember that one and had a chuckle.
“And A.J. is apple pie.”
And then Applejack chokes.
It’s Rainbow Dash’s turn to laugh at Applejack’s expense. “What, like you’re married or something?”
“Like we’re family!” Applejack quickly puts a moratorium on even that sort of pseudo-incest.
“And maybe a little bit married.” Pinkie is quick to raise it back up.
Rarity rolls back onto her stomach, letting Twilight and Fluttershy actually flash back to reality. Rarity gives Pinkie a playful pout. “I take that mine is ‘marshmallow’?”
“Yepyep!”
“I can live with that.”
“And Twilight is twiggle-wiggle.”
“Really? ” Twilight grimaced as somepony else just twisted her name so.
As if a reminder, Rarity put it. “Don’t you like it, my adorable twinkle sprinkle?”
“More like ‘adorkable’!” Pinkie said.
“Pinkie, that’s mean!” Rarity covered her hoof as she giggled. “Even if it’s true!”
Pinkie then reminded the last pony she hadn’t forgotten about her. “And Fluttershy is just ‘beautiful’!”
Fluttershy flinched, more like a subdue jump and squeaked.
“And sometimes ‘buttershy’. Or ‘flutterbutt’. Or ‘butterbutt’!”
Fluttershy opened her mouth to scream but had no voice. Applejack took notice and decided a fresh moratorium was needed.
“Pinkie .”
Pinkie was done then, with Fluttershy specifically, but she kept nattering on as she rolled on her back. “So, not all the time though. Only when I, like, like -like you guys.”
That brought a fresh round of contemplating silence until Twilight spoke up, hoof on her chin. “Oh yeah, that’s is a thing, isn’t it?” She said, remembering the bar discussion a time ago.
Applejack tilted her head. “I don’t think I ever hear ya call us that.”
“Well, of course, I have restraint .” Pinkie rolled her eyes, though it looked weird from her upside down position.
Dash scrunched up her nose. “Well, that just sounds wrong.”
Rarity sat up. “That’s right, honeybun, that doesn't sound like you!”
“Though we appreciate the thought, right girls?” Fluttershy smiled, appreciating anything with ‘restraint’ in regard to her.
“That’s sure as the seasons-” Whatever that means. “-but I don’t think any of us would really mind,” Applejack said.
“I agree.” Twilight nodded sagely. “We're all very close already, and I think most of us should be okay with displays of affection. “
Dash grimaced with wide eyes. “I’m not!”
Rarity motioned as if to pat Dash’s shoulder from across the circle. “And that’s quite alright, champ, you don’t have to be.”
Pinkie rolled onto her stomach with eyes twinkling with far more energy than good sense. “You mean I can call you cute pet names whenever I want?”
“Shuck, suga’.” Applejack pumped a hoof. “You can be as open with your crushin’ on me whenever it’s got you.”
“Indeed!” Rarity made an even more dramatic motion, waving a hoof. “Feel free to lavish me with your feelings, honeybun darling!”
Twilight sedately offered her own hoof. “Just as long as you don’t do anything we wouldn’t like of course.”
Applejack nodded. “Yeah, just leave the pegasi alone, I guess.”
“N-no!” Fluttershy shook her head, trying her best to uncurl from herself while tensing all the more. “I want to join in too. Pinkie Pie can show me her affection too!”
“Aww, you guys!” Pinkie Pie put her hooves over her heart. “You’re the best friends a filly could have!”
“Ah, what?” Dash looked at all the lubby-dubby happening around her. “Even Fluttershy? Well, no, I’m still stayin’ out of this mushy stuff.”
Pinkie leaned across Twilight. “Don’t worry, Rainbow Dash, I know you don’t like this kind of stuff. That’s why I never told you I sometimes pretend our prank play dates are just regular dates!”
“Wait, what ?”
Pinkie snapped back to her position. “Eeehee! This is going to be so much fun, guys!” She clapped her hooves, eyes alight with ideas .
Author's Note
This chapter also refers to ~~Chapter 2 of Afternoon At The Summit,~~ ~~Train Of Thought~~ ~~and~~* the standalone story The Morning After Last Nightmare Night
(*That story was discontinued so as to facilitate rewriting)
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
Well, today had been a tiring day, but a productively tiring day. At least, that’s what Rarity thought. Plenty of commissions significantly progressed upon, a couple finished and a couple more even made. Today had been a dizzying rush! Why, she could’ve given Pinkie Pie a run for her money, she dare thought. All in all, there had just been one hiccup.
One particular customer, almost lost over a misunderstanding and Rarity’s own woeful ignorance. The memory of it made Rarity stumble on her way up the stairs, mumbling an apology to no pony. A look outside reminded her how long ago that incident was.
He wanted a dress based on a sea slug. At first, Rarity was reticent; slugs were not very fabulous creatures at all. And, at first , the customer was quite put out with her opinion, one she really should have learned to keep to herself, honestly. It was like she was channeling Applejack on a bad day.
Worst was when she found out how very wrong she was, so proven when the huffy client dragged her to the library. Also, better, because sea slugs, far beyond their terrestrial cousins, were indeed fabulous, absolutely fabulous, as Spike so enthusiastically showed her. Now, Rarity didn’t just want to make this stallion a dress, she wanted to create an entire line-up! The client must have seen how sincere she was, because he accepted her apology and pre-ordered a few more of her upcoming line-up as well.
All in all, it turned out so well, it set the tone for the rest of her day. So invigorated then by this, she got a lot more work done besides. By the end of the day, the crash of her high finally came but it was a very satisfied weariness that hit her. She was ready to go to bed now, so she thought as she entered her room, with a satisfied smile on her-
Violins began to play.
“Ooooh, when starlight hits your blue sapphires~!”
Then the trumpets sounded.
“Ooooh, it lights in me so many fires~!”
Rarity dashed for her window and threw it open, looking on outside.
“Let me tell you where this heat stems~”
“Becuase the cascade of your tail~
“It would never, ever fail~”
Rarity gawked, her eyes darting across the scene on her front lawn. There was an entire burro mariachi band, with a trumpet player, two different guitars- bass? Was that a bass? -a harp even and there was Pinkie Pie, all dressed to match her frie- was that Cranky ? -Pinkie hopping about with a violin.
“To bring my eyes to your azure gems~”
Hold on, was that about her butt? Rarity was getting awfully suspicious this was about her butt. She’d listen to a few more lyrics though, before she jumped to any conclusions.
“Between the tail of your dock~
“And the leg of your hock~
“I just cannot look awaaay~ ”
Nope, okay, yep, nope, this was a song about looking at her butt. Admittedly, a nice looking butt, if Rarity did say so herself. She worked hard for this butt. Not exactly a Fluttershy butt, but who is really?
“But if I may be frank~
“It’s not just your flank~
“That gets me going everydaaay~ ”
Oh, we’re getting past the butt part? That’s nice. Admittedly, a lot of classical love songs were extended metaphors for coitus, so she couldn’t fault Pinkie for cutting a little closer to the chase. Besides, it made her feel sexy.
“Your eyes, your face, the dip of your waist~
“You’re a vision of modern beauty~”
Rarity settled her face on her hoof, smiling half-lidded as she settled in for a very pleasant ride. This was turning out to be a surprisingly good evening, all things considered.
“Your guise, your grace, the height of your taste~
“Sure, you’re a little bit snooty~
“But that’s why I love you~
“You’re incredibly vain~
“About that beautiful mane~
“But you’d take any jane~” Pinkie pulled in Matilda. From where, no pony or donkey kno- oh, no, wait, she was waiting over to the side for her cue. This wasn’t it, though, and Matilda was spun away with shriek, in part delighted, just a split second later.
“And make her not plain~
“Not matter the strain~
“You’d give anything to make anypony just as pretty as you~
“You’d give it all to make the world a sparklier place~
“You’re digging for gems, getting dirty and gritty, it’s true~
“Whatever it takes to keep your boutique in the race~
“You’ve got a mighty greed~
“A really terrible need~
“But that’s just the seed~
“We all must concede~
“That your wants will recede~
“When you hear any plead~”
On the one hoof, being reminded of some of her less desirable aspects made the faintest grimace briefly on Rarity’s face, but she understood the sentiment. Her flaws were reputed and in some turned around into her greatest strengths. She sighed, shivering in delight, knowing she was loved, warts and all.
Oh, she certainly didn’t want any actual warts though! Ghastly!
“Generous and greedy~”
“Giving and needy~”
“You’re a high class mare~”
“From the middle of nowhere~”
“It almost sounds like fiction~”
“That kind of contradiction~”
“But you make it work and that’s why I love yoouu!! ”
The music ended with a flourish, the kind of musical flourish that seemed like it was going to be a twirl but did a one-eighty at the last moment and became a whirl . Rarity broke into applause, clapping her hooves together more daintily rather than stomping her feet.
“Bravo! Bravo!” Rarity stuck her head further out the window. Out the corner of her eye, she saw neighbors sticking also watching this nighttime show, some rather blearily and even a few annoyed. She didn’t mind, this was her moment. And Pinkie’s. Which she was giving to Rarity. “That was wonderful, honeybun!”
Pinkie Pie took a bipedal step front from her band, sweeping her sombrero off her head to bow. “Why thank you, Lady Rarity.” Seemed like she should have been saying it in borrico but ah well . Rarity squealed at ‘Lady Rarity’ anyway. Pinkie continued, “Would you do me the honors, Lady Rarity, of joining me for a candlelit dinner?”
Lady Rarity covered her mouth to hide the wide grin on her face. “Oh ho my! Oh, of course, Pinkie my honeybun darling. I’d love too!”
“Great!” Pinkie through her sombrero back and dashed for the Boutique’s front door. “See you inside!”
“... what?”
Rarity found herself turning around to go right back down her stairs she had just been going up a moment ago. It was dark downstairs, yes, she remembered turning off the lights. She didn’t remember lighting all these candles though. She stopped short just two-thirds of the way there when her, er, date showed up. Wow .
Pinkie… Pinkie looked rather dashing in a tux. With her hair pulled back so it was flat around her head with a massive, fluffy ponytail. It looked rather butch . Rarity felt an electric tingle travelling up her spine which she tried to bite off at her lower lip.
Pinkie took off her hat- she was wearing a fedora. An actual fedora, not a silly trilby . “M’lady.” Well, okay, still Pinkie Pie, she couldn’t resist herself.
“Pinkie-” Rarity stopped, taking in some of her surroundings, her home by the way. “Pinkie. Why is my work area curtained off?” She looked at the normally open archway towards her shop and then- “And all my clothes in the kitchen? ” The little back kitchen was stuffed full of racks and- not any of her ponnequins, thank heavens.
“Eeeh-” Pinkie put her hat back on. “Eheheh. Well, ya see Rarity, I kinda needed your runway for something but I didn’t want to spoil the surprise but I also wanted to give you a chance to, ya know, dress-up?”
“With my merchandise ?” Rarity gave her a half-lidded frown. “Honeybun, I have my own private selection for every occasion.” She smiled then, making Pinkie relax. “Wait one moment.”
Rarity didn’t open her antique vicoltian armoire, a unit far more curvy and top-heavy than it needed to be, so much as unfurled it. Each opening door and compartment revealed another and one could almost hear the sound of robots transforming out of their disguises.
Rarity eyed the rows of dress, hats, saddles and then some with a critical eye. All the while, her mind whirled.
So, am I really going along with this?
Black is always a safe color.
Well, why not? Pinkie is a good friend.
Red also has a certain universal appeal.
This is all so sudden, though!
But are either really my color?
Not for her, she clearly put a lot of thought into this.
I am clearly a blue mare.
What would this mean for us?
What shade of blue though?
It doesn’t have to mean anything.
Something a bit on the purplish side, I think.
We all gave her permission to show her affection.
Green is not my color.
I knew, or I should have known, exactly what I weas getting into with that.
Straps? No straps?
And she’ll be over it in a little while.
Sparkles? Definitely sparkles.
In the meantime, I get everything I ever could have wanted.
Wait, this looks like Maud’s dress.
…
Pick something else.
Do I really want that to end?
Perfect!
Did you know Matilda can sing in ancient asinine? Rarity didn’t. At least she now knew what Pinkie needed her runway for, that was for the show. The burros had switched out their mariachi outfits for fancy tuxes of their own and proved to be quite talented by switching to similar instruments for a more classical genre. Cranky was still on the harp and Matilda belted out tunes in a dead language Rarity had no hope of understanding.
Rather convenient for me, really, so I don’t have to transcribe them. If it helps, imagine the sort of song conceived for a long lost lover, promising that your heart will go on . Maybe throw in a sinking boat in there somewhere. A lot of ponies died but who cares? Only half the happy couple survived, that’s the real tragedy!
The surrounding decor and entertainment was amazing, but then there was the spread. It seemed like Pinkie had stripped the donkeys of their burro music and transferred it over to the food. Lots of beans, cheese, olives and chopped up greens and veggies, and thin flatbread meant for folding and wrapping around these ingredients.
Rarity didn’t know if this was appropriate for a candlelit dinner, or what the band might think of the cultural appropriation, but Pinkie was certainly trying her best. Everything else about this was simply magical, the countless little flames, and the spotlight down on Matilda, were the only lights around them. Besides, the food smelled good .
“You look really pretty, Rarity.”
Rarity looked up at Pinkie and breathed deeply. Pinkie looked even better now, thanks in no small part to Rarity’s efforts. The fashionista, she comes down in her resplendent gown, the one without a back, thank you, her hair and makeup done up too, with Pinkie waiting patiently down stairs, smiling, of course . She says much the same as she did just then but added something wonderful. “Could you help me dress-up too?”
Rarity was of the opinion that Pinkie’s hair, what she did with it that evening, was already great. Not only did she leave it alone, she used it as the basis for the rest. The tuxedo was merely okay, and used improvement. Seeing where Pinkie was going with this, and loving it , she cut everything to emphasize a masculine figure overlayed over Pinkie feminine form.
Pinkie’s suggestions of flannel were thoroughly rejected.
“Rarity? Marshmallow ?”
Rarity snapped out of her reverie. That was just a few moments ago and she was still reeling in fantasyland about it. Heart beating, face flushed, she had to shake her head to shake it off and get her head back to reality.
Rarity leaned back, trying to play it cool but her poker face was slipping. “Mmm, yes, honeybun?”
“Are you okay?” Pinkie asked, pressing her front hooves together. “Do you need to, um, freshen up ?” She asked with hoof quotes around the words.
What I need to do is resist throwing you over this table right now , Rarity thought.
She sniffed and her mouth watered some more. This was some good food here, maybe she’d ravish Pinkie when the food was cleared. Oh yeah, that was totally a normal thought to have.
“Not at all, honeybun.” Rarity gestured to the food. “I’m just wondering where to start. I’m afraid I don’t have that much experience with burro food. Could you show me how to eat this?”
Rarity gave a satisfied groan, feeling so very full. Maybe if Pinkie had some rather different set of equipment, this might suggest something completely different. With some finagling and imagination, it might still but, as is the case, it’s just Rarity in a food coma.
There had been pastries for dessert because of course there were . They were oh so good and Rarity couldn’t just stop at just one or just one more , no matter how many times she said that. The band also took a break to gorge themselves on sweets, and Rarity wondered if that was what constituted as their payment. She knew, in that moment, it would be well-worth it.
Rarity was in absolutely no condition to ravage anypony, but she wouldn’t mind having her bodices ripped of, goodness knows it was already pretty strained at this point, and letting Pinkie Pie- what would be an appropriate innuendo? Something to do with parties and maybe pants she didn’t wear.
This was just the first date, but surely Pinkie wouldn’t mind. There were quite a few signal she had been sending, things that made Rarity quiver in delight. The little moment with Pinkie, her tongue, some sour cream and a taco came delightfully to mind. That couldn’t have been an accident. Rarity sure hoped it wasn’t and couldn’t imagine it being anything else in her sugar-addled near-food coma-state delirious mind.
Pinkie carried the rather heavier mare up the stairs as she hummed in delighted imagination. Not that Rarity was heavier than Pinkie, just no , but Rarity after dinner was rather heavier than Rarity before. It wasn’t any problem for Pinkie, for as nontraditional as she was was still an earth pony. She even pronked up the stairs for goodness sake, an act which made Rarity burb. In her state, she couldn’t be mortified at her crude behavior but only enjoyed the sense of relief.
Rarity really wanted Pinkie to ‘pronk’ her, hoof quotes and all, for some real relief. They were already going to her bedroom, there is absolutely no other way this could go. Rarity tried to welcome Pinkie inside her abode, but had a small problem of being half-conscious on Pinkie’s back. Not that, it seemed, Pinkie was going to need much input from Rarity.
Like a gentlemare, Pinkie laid her out so softly on her bed. Rarity would just giggle demurely, sprawling herself out, waiting for more . With her teeth , Pinkie grabbed the laces of Rarity’s dress and slid the fabric of her body. Rarity closed her eye then, laying her naked self out. She felt a fuzzy warmth crawl up her body, and a loving kiss planted on her cheek.
Yes! Yes! Take me now!
“Good night, Rarity!”
Pardon?
Rarity struggled to get her eyes open, but managed to see the blurry pink form bouncing out of her room. She wanted to reach up and tell her to come back, but her body felt so heavy. Pinkie closed the door, leaving her alone and oddly cold under the warm blanket. She could only whimper a little bit, blinking blearily. It got a lot fuzzier and then black.
What a gentlemare , was the last thing Rarity thought with a smile.
Author's Note
Is this raunchier? Tell me if this is raunchier.
Edit: Found a picture that gets what I meant with Pinkie's hairstyle the closest, but it's pretty questionable. If you want, look up image #1310684 on Derpibooru. It's a humanized Pinkie Pie by Captain Pudge Muffin with the tags "alternate hairstyle" and "pony tail" being prominent for this.
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
When Rarity met-up with Applejack at Barnyard Bargains, it was clear she had something to say but Applejack had something to do . She’d be able to talk to her friend in just a little bit, and maybe hear an explanation for the mariachi band heard even faintly as far as the farm. First, though, she had something to take care of.
“Hold that thought, Rares. I gotta take care of something.”
“Of course , sugarcube.”
Applejack turned away and gave her head a little shake. She didn’t quite know if it was just having her own diminutive turned on her like that, or just hearing it said with a faux-Canterlot accent that seemed to bother her a little.
She didn’t have time to worry about it though, because she had things to do, places to be, ponies to see. Yes, was Applejack just an important highfalutin pony? She didn’t spot her target immediately, but somepony was there who might be able to help.
“Well, hey there, Plastic!” She called to one of the bagcolts waiting patiently at the end of a checkout. It seemed there was a small hold up as Hugh Jelly brought out jars upon jars of copper bits from his saddle. All around the stallion, eyes filled with something that Twilight definitely would not approve of.
Plastic did a take between the would-be customer and Applejack. This was a young stallion that took the awkwardness of puberty and threatened to reach a state of apotheosis with it. Pimples, upper-lip fuzz that wasn’t even the little mustache that could, not that many stallions ever progressed much further and therefore didn’t bother. “Uh, huh, h-hey, Applejack.” And a voice that cracked at least a dozen times over six syllables, including stuttering.
Applejack approached with Rarity close on her heel. “Plastic, where’s yer boss?”
“Mmm-m-mr. Rich is out this moment, Applejack.” He looked briefly thoughtful. “M-m-my uncle i-is still here though.”
“His uncle is Filthy’s right hoof mare,” Applejack told Rarity. She corrected herself, “Stallion.” She seemed to know exactly where to find this stallion, giving a nod to Plastic as she trotted off. “Thank ya, Plastic!”
“A-a-a-a-a-” I’m sure this’ll end at some point. “-a-a-” Any second now. “-anytime, A-” Oh for goodness sake. “-applejack!”
“Real stud farm around here, actually,” Applejack commented to Rarity, as soon as the two were sufficient steps away.
Rarity chided her, “Why, Applejack, you’re not the type of mare that thinks that anypony that isn’t a Guard needs a princess in charge, do you?”
Applejack did a real quick backtrack. “F’course not! It’s real nice to see actually. Everypony thinks you couldn’t get a buncha colts in a room to work together unless they already had ranks to tell ‘em who’s boss.” She shook her head. “No, nah, I ain’t one of those kinda gals.”
“How very cosmopolitan of you, sugarcube.”
“I think it’s really impressive what Filthy has done with all this colt power. Buncha honest, nice and likeable co- oh! Hey there, Sleaze Bag!”
Rarity was not ready for this one-eighty turn.
“Aaaah, yes, Apple jack.”
Here was a stallion, if she were to be honest, that really looked like a sleaze. She remembered the Manehatten grifter during her little outing with Pinkie and Maud, but this stallion blew him out of the water. Everything that cannon-stealing snot had, thin mustache, greased back hair, weaselly face and thin body, but ''more''. Even his voice positively dripped with oil.
"Rarity, this here is Sleaze Bag, Dirt Bag's son. His pops and my pops did business back in the day, bringing the best kind of soil to the farm that made Sweet Apple Acres what it is today."
"Ah, yes. But now my father is retired and my older brother runs the business. Expanded it to more, eh, potent fertilizer."
"He's talkin' 'bout manure."
Rarity cringed. "Right. Wait- what's your older brother's name?"
Applejack coughed. "Well, Rarity, we just call him Mister Bag."
"Right. "
"So, hey, Sleaze, how's the rest of your family? How's your little brother doin'?"
"Well, yes , ah, Scum Bag might just be the second doctor in the family. Not a real medical doctor like my sister, but he's studying swamp biology."
"Hold on." Rarity raised her hoof a bit. "Your sister, is she the gynecologists at Ponyville General?"
"Ah, yes. I guess it makes sense that you would know her."
"Quite . And now I think I'm starting to figure out what the first initial of her name stands for."
Sleaze Bag shook his head. "She likes to pretend it means 'Doctor', yes ."
The heavy cart pulled against her as she walked, much to Applejack's satisfaction. The part she had been waiting for, a great big engine block, was there even without Filthy and Sleaze had been fair in his dealings selling it to her. He had to be, because a stallion that looked, sounded and was named like him had only his reputation. Right now, though, she wasn't thinking about slimy colts. She was doing her best imitation of her brother, chewing slowly on the wheat grass.
"You and Pinkie. Seriously?"
"Quite. Well, I am. Serious, that it. It's difficult to tell with her."
"Candlelit dinner and all that?"
"Indeed . All that."
"And you really like all that? Even with the singin' about your flank?"
"Applejack, how often do you think I get serenaded by moonlight beneath my bedroom window?"
"Er-"
"Not very much at all, let me tell you."
"Point taken. So you expect you and her are gonna go on a second date?"
In a startling show of grace, Rarity crossed her front legs in a pensive gesture, looking to the side, while still keeping pace with Applejack. "I don't know. Pinkie Pie has made it quite clear how variable her feelings are. However-" She turned forwards, smirking then. "-I wouldn't say no."
Applejack clucked her tongue as she pushed her hat up. "And here I am just realizing we gave her permission to do that sorta thing to all of us."
"Hoping for a country music love ballad, sugarcube? Cranky's band is quite adaptable, you know."
"I'm-a hafta start callin' you 'darlin''."
"And I'm going to have to start loving that ."
"Ri- oh, hey, speak o' the draconequus and he will come, there's our little cotton candy Casahoova now."
"Blast , that's what I should've made her pet- oh, hello there, honeybun dear!"
Pinkie Pie stopped short as she stepped out the door, her head spinning fast enough to crack her voluminous hair. One poor pony coming behind her squawked as it smacked him in the face and he had to stumble back with a mouth full of pink fluff.
"Not like this!" Pokey cried as he stumbled away. This gave the mares brief pause but he seemed to be alright, muttering though he was of drowning in fuchsia fuzz. Awfully poetic, that Pokey.
"Hey girls!" Pinkie responded, though her voice was a bit muffled by the bag strap in her mouth.
"Hey there, Pinkie." Applejack nodded in general greeting and then to the bag. "Watchu got there?"
"What I got where?"
"In your mouth, honeybun." Rarity pointed at said bag before looking up. "Going to spice up our next get together?" She asked while reading the sign up behind Pinkie. "This is Berry's place of business."
"Oh, this. It's a gift."
"Oh?" Rarity cooed with curiosity, leaning forward. "Ooooh? " Well, more like draping herself over Pinkie.
"Anypony in particular, sugar?" Applejack asked while eyeballing Rarity's lurid display. She was pulling Pinkie's mane back into a ponytail, trying in vain to get the hair directly on top of her head to flatten. Pinkie Pie carried on like it were nothing.
She shook her head, making Rarity grunt in frustration. "I can't say." She looked more directly at Applejack. "It's a secret, sshhh- " She put the edge of her hooves to her lips. "I'll see you girls later!"
She slipped on past Applejack, half bouncing in her trot with a bag in her mouth. Both her friends watched her go with their own expressions. Applejack watched her with a quirked brow.
"Now, what in the world do you suppose that was about?"
Rarity, for her part, reached out with desperate futility. "No-oh-ho! Come back, my burning hunk of pink butch!"
Applejack cringed. "Gosh darnit, Rarity, have some of that class of yers."
Rarity shot a pointed look at Applejack, opening her mouth to retort before stopping. Her look turned appraising, her frown a thoughtful sort. "Why, you're quite the mans' mare yourself, Applejack. Have you ever considered flannel ?"
Applejack whickered. "I think I liked it better when you had us all on in the friendzone. What ever happened to that?"
It was without Rarity that Applejack made her way back home. The other mare was being a right pain in the hoof at the moment. She needed to find some pants and stuff it, whatever it was, in there and keep it there! It was getting close to evening and Applejack was looking forward to putting whatever this craziness with Pinkie Pie behind her until tomorrow.
"Oh fer land's sake."
Speak of the draconequus and he will come, or already be there when you arrive in this case. Applejack shook her head at what she saw through the front window. There was nothing to do but face the music-
Ah, gee, ah hope not. I don't really like burro music, nothin' 'gainst 'em.
"Howdy, everypony, I'm back." Applejack huffed and frowned as she came in through the front door, eyes flickering over her family all crowded here in the front room. "And a howdy to you too, Pinkie. What're you up to?"
Granny hefted a bottle- wazzat triple sec? Eeyup. Not the bottle Applejack got for her, this was fresh. "Pinkie here is bein' a right proper gentlemare and askin' me permission to be askin' you out, Applejack."
Applejack looked between Granny and the grinning pink mare. Then the other two, also standing bemusedly to the side, giggling. Well, Apple Bloom giggled, Big Mac giggled on the inside. Smart flanked pair of punks, the both of them.
Back to Granny and Pinkie. "Do I get a say in this?"
Pinkie ducked out of sight and Applejack felt her close the short distance between them via a path somehow shorter than a straight one.
Pinkie popped right back in front of Applejack, a small smile on her face that counted as restrained on her. "Of course, you silly pony! So, you wanna go for a walk?"
Applejack popped a brow up like only she could. "Just a walk?" And hopefully one on relatively real paths and not whatever Pinkie trotted on.
"Just a walk to see the sunset, maybe a chat."
"No mariachi band?"
Pinkie's restraint broke and her grin widened. "Do you want there to be a mariachi band?"
"Eenope."
"Then noperoni!"
Applejack huffed, tilting her hat and smiling softly herself. "Then that sounds darn tootin' lovely."
As the two trotted off, her family watched her go, grinning with barely contained catcalls of sorts. In fact, Big Mac couldn't hold himself back any longer and opened his mouth.
"Have 'er home by dinner!" Granny Smith crowed. Then, after a moment's thought, more seriously said, "And then stay for dinner!"
Big Mac shuffled on his hooves, trying to think of a new line. Something did come to him then, and he moved for another go.
"Now don't get too fresh with mah sister, ya hear!?" Apple Bloom called. "Or we's gonna hafta have ourselves a pitchfork weddin'!"
Bic Mac swayed side to side. Then he finally nodded and said, "Eeyup!"
"Really, that's all you can think of?"
"C'mon, Big Mac, ya can do better than that!"
Applejack walked shoulder to shoulder with Pinkie Pie. The two of them said nothing, just quietly trotting through the apple orchard, looking around the cultivated trees. It was a calm and placid path they took through the farmland, not saying a word to each other and just enjoying another pony's presence without any greater activity than walking.
And it was absolutely freaking Applejack out.
"Say, Pinkie , you got anything planned?"
"Yep yep yep!"
"Huh, well, I was expectin' ya to be coy about it. What is it ya got planned, sugarcube?"
"Hold on a second, Applepie."
Applejack flinched in surprise at the pet name, remembering it bringing a blush to her face. She watched as Pinkie Pie hopped and skipped off the trail and behind a tree too thin to hide her front half. Applejack felt it in her hooves and her second heart as Pinkie Pie's body stretched across unseen paths.
Earth pony magic, this was the kinda thing Twilight didn't understand, though she might begin to all things considered. Not that Applejack understood Pinkie's particular mastery anymore than Rarity could Twilight's. Or maybe it was more like Fluttershy watching Rainbow Dash fly.
Or was it like Rainbow Dash watching Fluttershy talk to animals and wondering how a pegasus's magic came to this?
Pinkie rustled behind the tree and off who knows where else, until she finally pulled back out with a picnic basket in her teeth. She pronked on back to the path, stopping with a split grin on her face as she held the handle.
"Watchu t'inkin' ab'ut?"
"Uh." Applejack thought about it. "Magic, I guess."
Pinkie dropped the basket into her hoof and arched a brow. "Am I on a walk with Twilight Jackle now?"
Twilight Jackle snorted. "Har har, Pinkie. Ya know, one of these days, one of us is gonna hafta to teach her how to use her second heart and I dunno which of us is more qualified."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I know a few tricks, like my buckin' and knowin' where to put the apple trees so they grow just right, but yer on a whole 'nother level."
Pinkie flipped a bit of her mane. "I am awesome, aren't I?"
"Hey now, reign it in, er, Rainbow Pie ."
Rainbow Pie giggled, covering her mouth. Then she sighed, looking at the ground. "You're right though. You know all the normal earth pony magic. I'd almost think I was some kinda super powered mutant if it weren't for Maud."
"Maud is not exactly a disqualifying factor for that."
"She has all my magic and normal earth pony magic too."
"Well, hey now, Pinkie. I can still feel what yer doin', even if I don't really right know how ."
Pinkie looked up and smiled, and Applejack felt relief. "You're right, my magic is just different . But hey, maybe we should have Maud teach Twilight since she knows all the magic."
Applejack followed Pinkie along as she started walking again. "You know what, I think I feel pretty comfortable passin' the buck along this time around."
"Ah, but she's still out getting her rocktorate."
"Huh."
"Hey, how come we never told Twilight about earth pony magic?"
"Uh, well, huh . Well, I guess weren't ever relevant. 'Cept maybe that time she was tryin' to study your Pinkie Sense."
Pinkie sighed wistfully "Yeah, that was a fun day."
Applejack cocked a brow. "You ever think that weren't a bit mean?"
"Well, she sorta strapped me to one of her kooky machines in her lab and started treating me like a experiment, so I thought I'd mess with her a little. Didn't really see that hydra coming though. Why didn't she teleport? "
"You ever think we mess with each other too often?"
Pinkie raised a hoof in a shrug.
Applejack grunted. "Well, anyway- I guess after she got them wings, it didn't really occur to me right away that she had a second heart too. I guess now it's plenty relevant now, ain't it?"
"Guess so, huh."
"So, anywho, Pinkie, where're we going?"
Pinkie looked back at her basket. "Oh! I was hoping you could show me where to go!"
"Huh?"
"Well, I talked to Granny Smith, and she agreed to postpone dinner till an hour and a half after dark."
"It'll be dark pretty soon."
"Yeah, so, I got this basket fulla appetizers to snack on and make us more hungry."
"You make those yourself?"
Then Pinkie's tone just dropped . Something of a pensive if playful murmur. "I made them just for you, Applejack."
"Thankya ki- wha?" Applejack did a double take at the shift in Pinkie's demeanor. Then her body went as rigid as it could while still walking when Pinkie drew herself even closer to Applejack. Her head went under Applejack's chin and rubbed against the bottom. Her hair-
-just like ma's!
Pinkie spoke in a soft, low murmur. "And then you can take me your favorite hilltop and we can watch the stars."
As Applejack's regular heart hammered in her chest and she looked down at Pinkie, thinking about what'd be like to make an honest mare out of her, one other thought floated to the top.
Oh boy, it's gonna be a looong evenin'.
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
"Well, it sounds like you had a lovely evening, sugarcube."
Applejack stared off somewhere past Rarity's head to the right and into space.
"Oh gosh, why the hay did I come have lunch with you guys?"
"Yeah, Dash, it is a lovely lunch, idn't it?"
Rainbow and Rarity looked at Applejack, whom, in turn, looked off past the pale edges of eternity.
"I was gonna make an honest mare out of her right then and there."
Rainbow cocked a brow and looked sidelong at Rarity. "What's that a euphemism for?"
"Mm, good question, I can't quite remember," Rarity said, staring at Applejack as she rubbed her chin. "She either was planning on marrying her or skipping right to the honeymoon."
Rainbow's eyes darted about. "And what's that a-"
"She was going to lay her down and plow her like a farm field, champ."
"Oooo kay then!"
"I'm happy I was able to illuminate you further."
Rainbow took another look at Applejack, still looking dead eyed off into some great unknown.
"I'd say she's got it bad, but she looks less googly-eyed and more like she walked in on her parents making Applebloom."
"Crude ," Rarity chided, then admitted, "But true. She seems far more traumatized than infatuated."
"What in the hay did Pinkie Pie do to her?"
"She seduced me, that hot pink succubus!"
The other two hopped as Applejack seemed to crash down to reality. Her descent back to this world had some bounce to it though, as she stared off for a moment again before flickering between her friends.
"She knew," She said, and again. "She knew . Everythin' there was that- that- that got under my coat? Nah! Everything that got under my tail!"
"Tsk, goodness . That corroborates-"
"Hey, I know that word!"
"Very good, champ. -with my own experience. I just didn't seem to react quite as-" Rarity covered her mouth. "-negatively ."
"Well, of course , you like getting the tail seduced off of ya!" Applejack snapped. She shrunk back at the look Rarity gave her. "Sorry, sorry. I- I know you and me got different tastes and there ain't nothin' wrong with that. But the game Pinkie's playin' ain't for everypony."
Rarity huffed, turning into a subdued knicker. "Yes, I suppose that's true. Mayhaps we should have a talk with our cotton candy Casahoova before she happens to break too many hearts."
"We should have it with her right quick, I think."
"Why's that, sugarcube?" Rarity asked.
"'Cause how do ya think Fluttershy's gonna react to her?"
Rarity froze stiff then and even Rainbow choked on her drink.
"Oh, so you're going to see Fluttershy too?"
"Yep yep! I gotta crush on her today, so I get to tell her about how I feel!"
Spike looked at Pinkie, frowning as kept walking with her up the winding dirt trail. "Oh yeah, that's a thing you're doing lately, isn't it?"
"Uhhuh! So, what're you up to then?"
"Oh, I just heard Fluttershy was having some animals troubles and I thought I'd help."
"Hey, that's nice of you."
"Just doin' my part to uphold my dragon- is that Starlight?"
"Yep, that sure is Starlight. Hi Starlight!"
As the would-be warlock came closer, it occured to Spike the direction was coming from, quite specifically the direction the two of them were headed.
"Oh no. "
"Hey there, Pinkie," she said as she got closer. "Hey there, Spike. Were you going to help Fluttershy too?"
"Oh no, no no no . Starlight, what did you do?"
Starlight looked at him with a frown. "Well, I heard Fluttershy needed help with her animal friends-"
"Did you use magic?"
"Well, yeah ."
"Oh my gosh. "
"Maybe you didn't notice, Spike," Starlight said, swishing her hair and grinning. "But I'm pretty good with- where're you going?"
"To make sure Fluttershy's cottage is still standing!"
"Oh, okay then." A pause and then, "Hey!" He wasn't listening, just dashing off, leaving her miffed and embarrassed. Starlight rubbed her leg as she watched him go before turning towards the only other pony. "So , hi Pinkie."
"Hiya there, Starlight."
"I, uh-" Starlight crossed her legs. "I heard you were, mmm, seducing everyone?"
"Oh, I guess. Mostly, I've been trying to make everypony I love happy."
"That sounds like you alright!" Starlight glanced askance then. "Albeit, with more ponies hollering about a pink temptress."
"Ha! Sounds like I've been doing a hay of a job."
"So, you have crushes on other ponies?"
Pinkie turned from down the lane towards Fluttershy's college to stare more intently at Starlight. Grinning. "Are you trying to get me to seduce you, Ms. Glimmer?"
"Wha- psh- no, Pinkie! Pinkie Pie? Pinkie, where are you going?"
Pinkie kept prancing down the path towards Fluttershy's. She raised on hoof in salutation. "I'm gonna go see how red I can make Fluttershy turn. Seduce ya later, Starlight!"
"Spike, everything is alright. Starlight was a- enthusiastic helper."
"Fluttershy, the geese are goose stepping, Harry is being overbearing, Angel Bunny is acting like an angel and the wolves are acting like they weren't raised by wolves!" Spike listed, tapping each of his claws in turn. "The reason I know this already is because your mice formed a secret police and are ratting out all the other animals. This is less of an animal farm and more of a social commentary on tyrannical dictatorships via woodland critters."
"I never liked that book," Fluttershy said with a sigh. "Those poor doggies."
"Are you sure you're alright?"
"Well, the animals are a lot less rowdy after Starlight's help," Fluttershy said.
"Yeah, I bet after the Starlight Glimmer patented brainwashing," Spike said, hands on his hips. "Isn't this the same thing she did to you guys?"
"Huh? Um, no. She stuck us in a room and played propaganda over and over over the speaker."
Spike blinked. "Oh. That sounds... mundane."
"This isn't going to be too much trouble either. I just have to look them straight in the eye, put my hoof down and tell them to cut it out."
Spike put his hands on his hips, looking back and forth. "Well, I guess if you're sure." He huffed, crossing his arms. "You've grown a lot, Fluttershy. Your confidence is amazing!"
"Thank you, Spike! I feel like I can handle anything."
Spike heads to the door then, satisfied. "I bet! You can even handle Pinkie Pie coming over to get lubby-dubby with you."
"Of course!"
Spike shut the door after him and Fluttershy blinked.
"Hold on, what?" She took a breath. She meant for it to be a deep breath, but she also wanted to another one right after, so it came out rather shallow. So it did its next rapidly cycled successors.
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. Pinkie's coming! And she's gonna get-
"Lubby-dubby! "
Her heart rapidly beat in her chest, she felt cold and hot and clammy all over, her fur was standing on end. Hearing was getting faint, vision was getting white and Holy Father Sun she's having a full blown panic attack. This is- this is really happening.
Her window clicked open and that pink monstrosity of affection clambered through. Fluttershy froze, she stopped moving, she stopped breathing, she was sure she felt her heart stop. She was frozen on the precipice between this waking world and darkness.
"Hey there, Fluttershy!" Pinkie said, hanging halfway through the window. "I just wanted to tell you, I think you're really cute and I like you a lot!" She kissed her own hoof and blew it towards Fluttershy. "Okay, I love you, bye bye!"
The beast of pink and love, the shadow archetype to the angelic Cadance, no doubt, slipped away from the window and back to the sugary Hellscape from whence she came. Fluttershy, for her part, not breathing, slipped away herself, finally falling away to a black and dreamless world.
"oh hello ... my old friend..."
"Oh no, that pink colored floozy got to Fluttershy too! Wake up, Fluttershy! Speak to me!
"Fluttershy, no!"
"Ya know, Rares, I wasn't there, but I bet this was what you sounded like when you were trying to bang Trender-"
Rarity growled. "Rainbow Dash."
"Get it? Cause you were acting like Applejack and now she's acting like you ?"
Rarity sniffed primly. "Applejack, is Fluttershy quite alright?"
"Yeah, no hurtin' here. Looks like all she did was get the case of the vapors."
"We must have just missed Pinkie then."
Rainbow snorted. "Or literally anypony else could have come by. It's Fluttershy ."
Rarity grimaced. She didn't like it, but Rainbow was right on that account.
Fluttershy's eyes fluttered open and above her a worried orange wearing a bunch of bananas frowned down at her. Really, this fruit salad could use some apples but it was a lot healthier than cotton candy.
"Hnngh, pink, lubby dubby."
"Well, nevermind, that about settles it," Rainbow admitted.
"C'mon, girls. We gots ourselves a pink menace to stop."
"It's just you who's saying that, Applejack."
"Wha- no! Rares agrees with me."
"Actually, I think I quite enjoy Pinkie's romantic streak."
"B-but- Fluttershy!"
"And Fluttershy could use a little shaking out her comfort zone every now and then. I think this was rather tame and gentle."
"Hmph, fine! Don't blame me for whoever she goes after next then!"
Author's Note
Hey there! Did you like any concepts presented in here? Think you write something interesting with it yourself? Go for it, braheim.
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
"Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Because you are Cu-Te!"
Twilight snorted.
"How about 11 protons? Cause you're Sodium fine!"
Twilight made that little pre-laugh scream, "Ah!"
She tried to cover her mouth politely but Pinkie grabbed her by the hoof and pulled her in close.
"Wanna dance?" Pinkie asked. "I can really put your inertia in motion ."
Twilight couldn't say yes, because she was so busy laughing. She didn't mind at all when Pinkie set her into a little spin.
Interior shot, Carousel Boutique. The header would read 'Meanwhile...', ellipsis and all. Four mares gathered around a table, two of them drinking tea. The other two technically had tea in front of them but the cups were untouched and the tea had grown cold, even as the conversation grew heated.
"Okay, this here is first meeting for the Preservation of Our Dignity 'Gainst That There Pink Menace Society."
Two of them, that would be the tea drinkers, gave her concerned looks at her uncharacteristic speech, and more so when she knocked back a small but strong-smelling jug. The other one just gave her an exasperated look as she nursed a steaming hot cup of black nectar.
"Now, there be only two of us left who haven't been seduced by that fluffy, curvy pink succubus," said Applejack, before knocking back another swig. "And one of them is here with us."
"I mean, it's pretty obvious she's gonna go for Twilight next and then me," Rainbow-Dash said.
Rarity looked up, "You seem awfully sure of that, champ. Some special insight into Pinkie's mind?"
"Nah, it's just common sense to save the best for last."
"Ah, of course."
"As completely useless as that is-" Applejack said with a tight grimace. "It is true that Rainbow is here with us and Twi is not . Twi is out there, alone , with that pink succubus. Innocent lil' librarian princess Twilight. Pinkie’s probably twistin' her into knots as we speak!"
"So you can see here, Pinkie, the strawberry thaumaton will be attracted to the blueberry thaumaton in a triangular fashion and repelled in a circular fashion."
"Ooh! That makes sense."
"And that's why your last pick up line simply didn't work."
"No, I understand. But hey, Twilight?"
"Yeah?"
"Why are thaumatons named after berries?"
"Oh, well-" Twilight put a hoof to her mouth thoughtfully. "That's a good question, Pinkie. I have a book here somewhere regarding the history of micro wizardry."
"I'd love to hear all about it!"
"Sure!"
Exterior shot, we've moved forward. Three mares run down Ponyville Main at a breakneck speed, another flying above them. Applejack here is taking the lead but certainly not by dint of being the fastest. She leads by dint of having a purpose, and by dint of her friends wanting to be right behind her as she sways dangerously about.
"C'mon, gurls, we's gotta save Twilight!"
"Applejack, wait!"
"I ain't stoppin' fer nothin', Ranbow! Twi's in- inno- incense is at stake 'ere!"
"Okay, ya, whatever, but the giant gleaming crystal tree castle, that takes up the whole horizon , is the other way!"
Applejack slowed, began to turn her head as she took in what Rainbow said,and came to a dead stop as she ran the side of her face into a wall.
"Uh, hey girls, what's going on?" Starlight asked.
Hesitantly, Fluttershy slowed to a halt and faced the other two mares. She nervously looked at her receding friends, and than back to the former bad mares.
"Well, I suppose were going to Twilight's to stop Pinkie, um..."
Starlight cocked a brow. "Is this about the whole thing with Pinkie seducing all of you?"
Meekly, Fluttershy nodded.
Trixie grimaced. "Oh my gosh, you were telling the truth about that."
Starlight nodded. "Yeah, I told you, it's a whole thing now."
"It almost sounds like one of those awful Neighponese comics."
"Not all manga is like that," Fluttershy said softly, but nopony heard her. "And some of those can be really good."
"I think it's kinda sweet," Starlight said.
Trixie grunted. "It sounds like a poorly written romantic comedy. All it needs is for the writer or the director to pick one of the mares to be best pony and that's the one the lead will get in the end."
Noticing neither of the two were paying attention to her, Fluttershy started backing up and then turned to catch up with her friends.
"And who's that?"
"Depends on what the writer likes." Trixie looked off to the receding forms of Fluttershy. "Any one of them would do. Look at them, prime specimens, all of them. It isn't fair for average mares like us."
"Wouldn't they go for the Mare-Next-Door?"
"That's already what Twilight is, just close enough to average while still being prettier than the rest of us." Some amount of venom actually crawled out of Trixie's voice.
"She's a princess, ya know."
"She ain't exactly no Cadence!"
Starlight snorted. "Would you like me to put in a word with Pinkie?"
"No." Trixie kept looking off towards the tree, even though she couldn’t see any of the four anymore. "I mean, it would be nice to find somepony who likes me. Who loves me."
Starlight smiled at her friend's back, raising up her front legs to give Trixie a big hug and to remind her she was loved.
"Who thinks I'm sexy."
And down those legs went. No way was she risking that can of worms.
The pair- the pink party planner pony and purple princess- padded playfully pending the proceeding portal of the pellucid palace. They trotted flank to flank, intimately close and smiling. Pinkie looked on with half-lidded eyes towards her companion while Twilight stuffed her face in a book. I mean, of course she did.
"Okay, despite acceptable unorthodoxies, this date has come along splendidly ."
"To be honest with you, Twiggles, I didn't really have a date planned when I came over. I just thought I'd flirt 'till you turned magenta."
"Well, we had a candlelit dinner-"
"It was four o'clock in the afternoon," Pinkie reminded her. "And how am I being the voice of reason here?"
"-made by a master chef."
"Spike made pasta."
"It was good pasta."
"Al dente!"
"And now, at the end of the date, I'm escorting you to the door. I mean, it says here I should escort you into your door, not out mine, but I did say acceptable unorthodoxies."
"I'm all about unorthodoxies, Twiggles," Pinkie said as they both walked on through the door. As they were right outside the castle and in public, plenty of ponies could see them just fine.
"Alrighty, now I lead you to outside the front door and then one of us gives the other a kiss goodnight," Twilight kept reading.
Pinkie smiled and looked up at the sky. "It looks like it's five-thirty, but we could pretend-"
Pinkie suddenly went very quiet when Twilight popped a peck on her cheek.
"Yes, let's pretend," Twilight said. She looked back down at her book and nodded. "Alright, successful date, complete! "
Pinkie covered her mouth to giggle, a laughing spell that quickly spread to her companion, both of them laughing at this nice, peaceful little mome-
"GET YER HOOVES OFF HER, YA DARN, DIRTY SUCCUBUS!"
Author's Note
Huh, this came out short.
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
Rarity's eyes narrowed. While it would have normally been difficult for her dainty frame to have kept up with the athletic farmer, her drunken stumbling made it possible. And so she was only a few paces behind Applejack, and Rarity’s discerning eyes could clearly see the couple across the wide, open space in front of the castle. She didn't see the image of emotional predation Applejack had woven, though.
Rarity saw two consenting adults enjoying one another's intimate company. Perhaps she felt a stab of jealousy, stemming from an admittedly growing, non-platonic fondness for her cotton candy Casahoova. Perhaps it was that feeling that encouraged her to go along with Applejack's erratic behavior. Perhaps self-reflection and recrimination would have to wait for later.
Now was a time for action.
"Rainbow Dash, champ, fetch an apple, tell whichever Apple is there that it's for family," Rarity said definitively, and she was pleased when her champion gave the only briefest frown of hesitation before darting away. "Dearest, you're with me."
Fluttershy nodded. "O-okay."
Rarity's horn lit up as they chased after Applejack, the mare reaching into her saddlebag and pulling out a length of ribbon. She sent the thing flitting through the air like a snake in between Applejack's legs.
"GET YER HOOVES OFF HER, YA DARN, DIRTY SUCCUBUS!"
Maybe in a better state, Applejack would have slipped out of it easy. In the state she was currently in, the ribbon tied around her legs and sent her sprawling face first into the dirt. Her own momentum was used to flip the farm pony on her back and Applejack's four legs were tied together by a beautiful bow, because that's how Rarity do.
"R-rarity!" Applejack stuttered from the sudden betrayal. "What in tarn- mhph!"
Rarity stuffed an apple in Applejack's mouth as a blue blur zipped away from her, circling back around. "Fluttershy, do the thing!"
"Mmph!" Applejack squawked through her fruity gag as Fluttershy grabbed her and pressed the farmer's face against her fluffy chest. Applejack struggled for a moment but Fluttershy rocked her, shushing her sweetly.
"Shhhhh- ch-ch-ch-shhhhhh..."
Tears welled up in Applejack's eyes as something told her spirit that mother was here. Mommy was here and it was gonna be alright. You just let it all out, little filly, it's gonna be alright . Applejack didn't even have the luxury either Twilight or Rainbow Dash might to appreciate the precise mechanics of this power, as pegasus and arion magic operated on such differing principles.
Twilight and Pinkie Pie cantered up to this scene, at last, what with it happening right in front of them. Well, it happened in front of Sun and sky and everypony, but those two were perhaps the most invested out of all the bystanders. "Rarity, girls!" Twilight looked about. Her gaze shifted between the hugging duo on the ground, to Rarity and then maybe Rainbow Dash. "What's going on?"
Rarity looked between her and her date, then back down to the farmer sniffling against her caretaker's chest. "Perhaps it'd be best we go inside and explain."
"Here, drink this."
Applejack tilted her head back as purple magic tilted the cup forward. Just below room temperature water, spiked with herbs, was poured down her throat. The thrones room had been rejected on the basis of comfort, and Twilight’s own library- which had her reading couches- was being occupied instead.
After she finished, Twilight pulled the cup away and set it down, looking over the coffee table, to the other couches and her friends. "Now, anyone wanna tell me what's going on? Pinkie, put your hoof down, you're just as confused as I am."
Rarity spoke, "To be honest, Twilight, I don't know where to begin. I feel rather ashamed being a part of this whole endeavor."
"And that endeavor was?"
Rarity bit her lip for a moment, looking askance to the side. Then she swooned, sweeping her hoof under her horn. "A most vile conspiracy, Twilight!"
"Uh-huh."
"A plan to- a plan to- um... blast, what was it? Applejack, I'm sorry, dear, what were we planning?"
Applejack groaned, leaning her head back and her hat forward. "I dunno... I was just feelin' . Ya know, emotions ."
"Okay!" Twilight clapped her forehooves. "How about we concentrate on that? What kind of emotions?"
"JEALOUSY , darling!" Who do you think?
"N-no." Twilight didn't have time for this. "No, Rarity, no ."
"I wanted my sweet, sugary pink cupcake all to myself!"
Rainbow Dash looked sidelong at Pinkie. "Oh wow, you're a real lady killer, Pinkie."
Pinkie, however, didn't have anything clever to add to that, and Rainbow Dash followed her gaze across the table. Applejack was leaning back against her seat, frowning at the ceiling with empty eyes. She turned obliquely down and to the side, avoiding Pinkie. She looked towards Twilight and motioned with her hoof.
"Gimme some more of that there leaf water, would ya?" She took it in her own hooves, and tilted it back with loud slurp. Applejack hummed as she let it soothe her tight throat. She sighed in not-quite-contentment. She had everypony's attention now as whatever in the Tartarean Depths Rarity was doing, rolling on her back, sprawled across Twilight's lap like an overdramatic cat.
Pinkie spoke, pleadingly, "Applejack."
"Ya know, you wear your hair just right, and you is a shoo in for my ma," Applejack drawled. "Ya know, 'cept more pink." Applejack tilted the cup back again, taking a drag of her drink. "And I'm mighty confused by how that turned me right the Hell on."
Rainbow peeled back with that one. So did, Rarity, mind, but it was Dash who commented, "Oh, wow , there is a lot to unpack there."
Twilight breathe through her teeth. "Applejack, I can't say for sure but- well, some faint Oedipon Complexes-" So named for the infamous lover colt who sought entrance into one of the noble houses by sleeping his way up to the top. Despite a shallow incline in that regard, he made indecent haste, clambering over nearly every single branch of that tree. All that only to find out in the end he was the long lost prince-heir of that already pretty closely related family. All things considered, he’d taken it rather well. "-are supposed to be rather common to a degree. It's said that plenty of ponies pursue partners that remind them of one or more of their parents or parental figures. But I also suspects that you're trying to put this in the worst possible light out of some misplaced guilt or anxiety."
“Mmhm,” Applejack grunted. "So, you may imagine mah- mah- I'mma use a fancy word- mah trepidation- trepidation?"
"Trepidation," Twilight confirmed.
"Not 'drepidation'? Wit' a 'd'?"
Twilight shook her head patiently, like she heard that one a lot. "No, it's with a 't'."
"Aight. -mah trepidation at thinkin' these thoughts. Ah'm feelin' all confused and- and- confused. And angry. And confused. And real lonely. And I'm thinkin' yeah, I'm thinkin', Ah'm gonna grab summa mah name sake, I am, and maybe it'll grease the wheels in mah noggin and Ah'd be able ta think straight, ya hear? Not that that there be how it worked out, ya ken?"
"Your accent is all over the place," Rainbow Dash said. "And also, weren't you mad about Pinkie making Fluttershy pass out?"
"That may have also been a factor in mah behavior, eeyup."
Pinkie blinked. "Hold on, I did what?"
"Uh, yeah, Pinks," Rainbow said, giving her a dubious look. "You seduced Fluttershy into a coma. Don't you remember doing that?"
Fluttershy coughed. "N-not really." For how softly she spoke, she still had everypony's attention, a fact she tried very hard not to acknowledge by staring pointedly at the coffee table. She spoke her next words in a rush, "Pinkie Pie came by and said I was cute and then she left and then I fainted."
"Seriously, Shy, just from that?"
"Yes, Fluttershy, dearest," Rarity said, rising from her lounged position across Twilight and Applejack's laps. "Sometimes, you can be rather brittle in your disposition."
Yes, she either crumbled or, on some occasions, snapped. Fluttershy nodded, humming a little as her hair fell around her face.
Applejack scowled. "Now- hey now, Fluttershy has made plenty o' progress in that regard."
"And I backslide a lot too."
Rainbow Dash frowned unhappily, not least because she may have just started the Fluttershy bashing train that now even Fluttershy was getting involved in. "Don't talk like that, Fluttershy. You're perfect."
Twilight raised a hoof, a distinct lack of assuredness and trepidation in her tone. "I think that-"
"Shut up, Twilight! She's perfect!"
Silence and Twilight slowly levelled against Rainbow Dash a look that was a pale imitation of her teacher's, but by gum- what a thing to imitate, even if it was just a fraction of it.
"I think that we all have flaws we could stand to work on, perhaps with the help of a professional. I know a good one, actually, I sent Starlight to a therapist as part of her parole. She still goes there sometimes."
Applejack tilted her head. "Starlight sees a shrink? Wha's next, she also had to take 'er medicine?"
Twilight didn't answer.
"Oh mah stars ."
"Don't talk to her about it, okay?"
"Was she off 'er meds when she brainwashed the rest' us while you was gone?"
"-and as he sank into the molten earth, he thrust one defiant hoof up and said, 'I'll be back, ya hear?' And whadya know-"
"Uh-huh." Starlight nodded with a half-lidded look that made it clear she wasn't there at all.
"-then Hokuto onii-san," 'onii' pronounced with one i, "-he says to me, he says, 'You all a unicone, Apperjack', which was a hallucination he was having on account of his out-of-control gigantism, see? Poor fella had a lot of problems but sweet as all get out."
"Yep." If Starlight had wanted to feel this monotonous and dead, she would have taken her pills that morning!
"-and then that little punk said to me, 'Yer princess is in another castle' and I said to him 'This here's Canterlot! What other castle is there!?' And he said-"
"Mmm ."
"I dunno, maybe? She feels a lot better about her current medications, and is a lot better at keeping up with it now."
Applejack, nor anypony else for that matter, said anything for a bit until, "So wus the name of her shrink?"
That One Time Pinkie Pie Romanced Her Friends
Disappear
Rainbow Dash smacked the cloud and it popped like a balloon without much of the noise. The various mists that made up the cloud scattered and fled in every direction, sighing humidly. They dispersed at her command, and she sent them off by the strength of her conviction. It wasn't just her smacking against it, although that certainly helped.
Vanish
Go away
Perhaps not in so many words, except the last ones, but the sentiment was the same. She ordered the clouds to disperse, and she did so with barely any effort. Most pegasi would coil up, gathering up strength of spirit as much as in their back legs, or banged at it rapidly a few times, tearing the cumulation apart with invictions of will. Fluttershy would have tried to slowly peel the mists apart, kindly pleading that they come apart but oh the poor dears look so comfortable I couldn't possibly- The point was, Rainbow used nearly much, if not more, force of personality as she did force of hooves to clear the skies, or anything else with weather for that matter.
Breaking the sound barrier was as much a matter of speed as her deciding she could not be stopped and convincing the air to agree .
It took hardly any time at all to do a quick favor for her old coworkers on the weather team. She just wished it hadn't involved the conversation that it had. Asking a certain pony in particular a certain particular question had probably been the biggest mistake. Certainly not Rainbow Dash's mistake, no. She was Dash's former second and now captain of the weather team. It had been her mistake for being there and her mistake for being so gosh darned weird.
It had been a get-together of old friends. Co-workers, more like, but they had been friendly then and they could featherin' be friendly now. It wasn't like Rainbow Dash had moved away, she had simply moved on , which might be arguably worst. Certainly, it was a pall that hung over the flock like a fogbank, at least for anypony with the emotional sensitivity of at least a teenager.
And then there was Rainbow Dash.
"So do you guys think I'm hot?"
Poor Thunderlane, he was about as prepared for this as Rarity was, oh so long ago at a Manehatten bar. Thankfully, it wasn't good Grapevine '95 wine, but just some cheap Studweiser Light that somepony brought. While he caught his breath, the others processed.
"Er..."
"Well-"
"What brought this on?"
Because, seriously, how do you respond to that? And it wasn’t that she was unattractive to the lot of them, it’s just a very loaded question.
Well, if one had been a certain pegasus who had been waiting for this moment her entire life, she’d have quite a response prepared for this. And there just so happen to be such a pony. She’d flit down from her perch cloud and sidle over onto Rainbow’s.
Rainbow scooched away from the intrusion, until the offender grabbed her by the cheeks. “Uh...”
“Rainbow, hon, ya know how I say I ‘bang’ ponies? Like, a lot?”
“Yeah?”
“Well, I wouldn’t just bang you!”
“Wha- hey!”
“I would smash you.”
“Huh.”
“I would smash you in half.”
Silence.
“Right down the middle.”
“Gosh darn it, Cloud Kicker.”
Evanesce , Rainbow Dash definitely didn't think because who even knows that's actually a word? The effect was still the same, and the second to last cloud evanished without a trace. Just one more-
Oh, horse apples!
She didn't want to see her friends right now, okay? After the whole debacle the other day with Applejack and Pinkie, all her friends seemed to get it in their heads it'd be cool to go visit some random stranger in a stuffy old office and talk about their, ugh , feelings . Thanks to Twilight's recommendations, and whatever the Tart' was going on in Applejack's head, everypony was being super lame.
Speaking of whom, that was exactly why Rainbow Dash fled up onto the last little cloud, as those two walked below her. It didn't look like they spotted her, which was good, because otherwise they might call her down and ask her how she felt. They'd give her these sad, worried looks- no, Twilight would give her this sad, worried look, asking her if she really felt fine. Applejack had even-odds for just giving her this smug look like she really knew how Dash felt. Buck you, Applejack-50%-Of-The-Time! You don't know me!
"How are you feeling?" Twilight said.
"Mighty drained, I tell you what, but it's starting to feel like a good kind of drained, ya know? Like after a hard day's work."
"It sounds like you're starting to feel better, Applejack," Twilight said with a happy sigh. "I'm glad."
"Thanks, Twi'."
"No problem. Ya know, you really are the emotional center of this group. You're so stable . Not only is it surprising to see you off-kilter, it's actually kind of distressing." A pause. "N-not that that's the only reason I want you to get better!"
"Nah, nah, Twi'. I getcha. By the by, you can see Rainbow's up there too, amirite?"
"Oh yeah. I'm hoping hearing us be centered and content will convince you to go to the therapist as well."
"UGH, YOU GUYS ARE SAPS!" Rainbow yelled down below. "What the featherin' clouds do you talk about with this guy, anyway!?"
"Ya know, I didn't mean to end the world. It's just, I thought, if those six didn't become friends, then some six other ponies would save the world. Maybe Trixie would be the Element Of Magic and, well I dunno, what's the mail mare's name? Derpy! Aaaand- Maud? Maud, 100% Maud.
"Whatever, okay? I thought anypony could have stepped up and done their job. And maybe, I dunno, been more amenable to my vision of an equalized, talentless utopia. Or maybe not, it was a dumb idea, I know that now . I might have gotten just as mad at 'Princess Trixie' and tried to timewarp her friendship and then have it rubbed in my face that all my ambitions and beliefs will end the world. Or just the reckless use of time travel, I dunno. Spike made me read all his 'Trot To The Future' to teach me how fickle time travel is.
"Ugh, it's just- I've come to really love those girls, okay? They're all really great in their own way. But apparently they're the chosen ones, and them alone. If you stop them from becoming friends, the world ends . Nothing but a barren wasteland. Or it gets conquered by Tirek or Chrysalis or the Flimflam brothers, whoever they are , or something. Whatever, I only saw the Maregnarok timeline so...
"Doesn't that bother you? That our entire world is a house of cards where the stupid interpersonal relationships of six lovely mares is the only thing hold it up? It ticks me off... ticked me off. Nopony was supposed to be that special."
"I worry that I'm not pulling my weight sometimes. As a heroine of Equestria, I mean. Such a silly thing to worry about, am I right? I'm a successful businessmare, I'm frankly beautiful and, oh yes, I'm a heroine of Equestria . I think asking to be one of the stars players of that last part is perhaps asking a bit too much. Could you imagine? I'd almost be one of those starlettes in some trashy young pony novel!
"Mmm. I worry about it though. I worry about Applejack, I feel like she in the same position as me. Not quite the same though- she's a rock and just about a second Twilight in an emergency. But she and I? We're not the fastest pegasus in Equestria, we're not the mightiest sorceress since Starswirl the Ugly Bell Hat, we're not a beautiful , beast mastering forest princess straight out of a fairy tale and we're definitely not Pinkie Pie.
"We hold our own, and that should be enough, don't you think? I think so. Did Applejack ever bring this up? Right, confidentiality, hush-hush, I understand. I'll just ask her myself. Actually, I should just ask her, we can talk about it. Isn't that what you're supposed to do?"
It took her awhile to even speak, let alone open up. It helped that the good doctor wasn't even a pony, and he was willing to crawl in her lap to let her pretend he was just a dog. Sure, as one of his breed, he actually out massed her by a factor, but that certainly never stopped that pony.
"I'm not kind, I'm very mean. I just never say anything, but I think it. I'm just awful . I think so many mean things about my friends. I always keep it to myself, and I don't say mean things and ponies think I'm nice. They think I'm kind, and I'm just quiet . I think bad things about a lot of ponies, my friends more than others. Like...
"Rainbow has been my best friend since I was a filly and a constant bane of my peace of mind. Pinkie is annoying , but when anypony else says that I get mad because they don't know how hard she works to make everypony happy. Twilight is such a know-it-all and self-righteous and such a suck-up . Sometimes I'm uncomfortable when Applejack is near me because I think she still likes me and looks at me creepy and I'm scared I look at Rarity that way and I'm so mad that she doesn't like me the same way I like her because I'm weak and not strong like Applejack and Rainbow Dash and it makes me even angrier. And then- then-
"I hate Starlight. I hate what she did to me, I hate when I had to pretend to believe her awful lies, I hate what she did to everypony, especially when I heard what she did to Equestria with her time spell. It's wonderful what Twilight did with her, it's wonderful that she turned her around, it's oh so wonderful that she's a better pony now, and I hate it. I want her to hurt and to suffer and to be punished and I know it won't help anypony, it certainly won't help her but it will make me feel better. I'm just...
"Awful ."
He whined. "After everything that happened to you, these feelings are completely understandable. Feelings of anger and resentment are to be expected after the trauma you went through. You're not a bad pony for feeling this way."
"I- I really wish I could believe that, doctor."
"Ya know, stuff ."
"Uh-huh."
Twilight prodded Applejack, tilting her to the side to draw the farmer's attention. Applejack looked, her eyes widening for a moment before smirking. "Woah nelly. Welp, we best get goin', Rainbow Dash, don't wanna take up more of your time. Come on, Twi'!"
Rainbow's eyes narrowed as she watched the two go, the pair of them looking so smug and knowing. "What in the world are you two-"
"Hey, Dashie!"
Rainbow did a double take here, between her escaping quarry and this new factor. Growing suspicion and resentment warred with a desire to give this her attention.
"Um, hey, Pinkie."
Another look confirmed that those two , probably laughing at her behind her back now, had already turned a corner and disappear. She could track them down, but then she did have to ditch-
"Wanna hang out?"
Rainbow looked back down at Pinkie. "Uh, sure." She kicked off her cloud and kicked again, evaporating it while barely thinking. She landed softly on the ground next to the jittering, excited pony.
Rainbow shifted her eyes about. "So, uh, what do you wanna do?"
"Dunno!" Pinkie seemed so excited by that. "We could just go for a walk, and see where it takes us."
Rainbow rolled her shoulders. "Sure thing." She looked, glancing where those two went and then in the other direction, quite deliberately so. "C'mon."
"Coming oning!"
Rainbow snorted.
And they walked.
Like, actually walked, the both of them. Rainbow didn't get tired of the ground and Pinkie didn't hop, but rather kept at least two hooves on the ground at all times as they made their progression. This uncharacteristic behavior on the former's part was brought in part by the latter. Something about Pinkie's relative stillness compelled her to go along with it. There was also her relative closeness to take into account, as Pinkie kept brushing up against her.
Suggestions on where they might spend their time kept being met with, "Whatever you want, Dashie!" Or some eager agreement thereof. This was not exactly unusual for Pinkie; definitely not as passive as Fluttershy, but Pinkie was down for anything as long as her friends were having fun. In fact, Pinkie could be easier to drag to things, because Fluttershy could be quite actively passive.
Nor was was this normally disagreeable to Dash, who quite liked it when ponies got with the program. The program being her program, of course, the best darn program there ever was. However, something about this situation seemed to be rubbing her the wrong way, much in the same Pinkie kept rubbing up against her.
"So, uh, hey, how about we swing by your place?"
"Ooo, a cupcake for my Cupcake!"
Okay.
"Pinkie, is this a date?"
Rainbow felt her stumble more than she saw it, because Pinkie was practically glued to her side at this point. The party pony recovered quickly and gave the athlete a big and somewhat nervous looking grin.
"It's a little bit of a date," She admitted. "Is that okay?"
Rainbow stopped, giving an askance look toward her companion. Pinkie stopped with her, still smiling, waiting and nervously jittering. After a moment of that, Rainbow sighed and rolled her eyes. She lifted up one of her wings and wrapped it around Pinkie's barrel. Pinkie gasped and squealed and did a little dance on her hooves.
Then she decided to be a little bit more bold and leaned in to give Rainbow Dash's cheeks a big ol' smoocheroni! What she got instead was a mouthful of feathers as Rainbow's other wings came and blocked her dive.
"Nope, none of that ."
"Awww."
Author's Note
Do you like my ideas but think you could write them better? Or just more to your liking? Or just want to use them? Yes, yes, yes, go for it, do it.
