Your Human and You: Serpent's Redemption

by TheThirdBomb

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Other, Adventure, Crossover, Sex, Profanity, Gore, Violence, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6
Length: 60703

Casting himself into the Boundary as a last insult to Ragna the Bloodedge, Hazama finds himself in a strange land, unable to talk and free from the mental 'guidance' of Terumi.

Jumping into the Boundary was meant to be an end to him. A way out. Away from the machinations of Amaterasu, of Terumi, and of Relius Clover. Unfortunately for Hazama, life wasn't quite done punishing him for his deeds just yet.

Stranded in a world where Humans are equivalent to beasts of burden and are owned by other beasts of burden, the Serpent's Fang finds himself swiftly reaching an impasse.

Perhaps dealing with a pissed off Ragna was the better option after all...

Crossover with the BlazBlue series of fighting games.
The Original Story: Your Human and You

Published 2017-11-12 22:40:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-01-16 15:29:27 UTC

The Pony and the Snake

It took longer than he would care to admit to come down from his high. Living was a hell of a drug after what felt like a solid week of not experiencing it.

Hazama took the time to examine his surroundings. He appeared to be positioned at the edge of a forest. A forest. How strange. There were indeed always trees grown in Kagutsuchi and Ikaruga, but never more than a few. Never a full, sprawling complex of green and brown like the one in front of him now. He placed the tips of his fingers on the bark of the tree closest to him and trailed them up and down slowly, roving over every indent, every bump and ridge until he was satisfied.

A chuckle passed his lips as he brushed his hand free of the few brown shavings it had accumulated and placed it back atop his hat. The things that could thrive without the presence of seithr to poison and cull them were truly impressive.

A light breeze slid past him, lifting his coattails on its way past. His nose twitched. He could smell something in the air. He could hear something in the wind. Flowing water. Birdsong. Squeaking of some kind. Life.

Hazama turned around to face the direction the wind come from. There, in the distance, what appeared to be a village of some description jutted out of the light morning haze. He could vaguely make out rooves of houses, triangular and… made of some unidentified material. It wasn’t metal, or brick, and he couldn’t perceive the colour through the mist.

Something was coming. He’d heard it in the treeline a moment ago. He could only assume that ‘it’ was a person, as an animal designed to hunt would not be nearly so easily detected. He made no move to make this knowledge evident on his face, but his free hand strayed beneath the lapel of his suit, index finger twitching on the handle of one of his knives. Waiting for the person tracking him to make a move.

It did so. Picking up on an increase in the rustling, Hazama turned on his heel, and made to unsheathe his blade before stopping short, bewildered. It was…A person. A Human being, as he expected, but he could never have prepared to face a fully nude woman with her head cocked to one side as she stared inquisitively at him while he dug for a knife in his pocket.

'The hell?' Is what he wanted to say, but the words didn’t come out. A low, choking noise was what escaped his throat in place of his sentence, his throat itching painfully as he tried again to speak. Nothing.

The woman risked another step closer, a strange humming coming from deep in her throat as she parted her lips, making a similar noise to Hazama’s failed attempt at speech. If meaning was supposed to be derived from this, the man couldn’t find it. Not to mention that he was uncharacteristically flustered at the current moment in time. He’d seen ridiculously well-proportioned women before, most of them trying to kill him incidentally, but none of them had ever decided to go fully naked.

He held out a hand, palm facing outward flatly in the universal gesture for ‘stop’. She didn’t. He took a step back. She took one forward.

Hazama felt like shouting, not that he didn’t also attempt to do so, to the same effect as before. This time, he could feel a twinge of some faint kind of magic flaring up in response. A sealing magic? It wasn’t overly strong, but as most Humans lacked magic of any kind, it would be effective regardless.

He considered briefly, continuing to back away from the approaching woman. Surely activating his Azure Grimoire would be much more than enough to dispel the magic affecting him? The seal was not even remotely close to the level of shit he’d seen Nine pull while under Izanami’s control. The BlazBlue would be overkill in dealing with this mess, but it was the only solution currently available. He made to release the 666th restriction, and immediately realised the one tiny issue with his plan. The key to activating the Grimoire was a verbal incantation.

Stupid! Stupid stupid stupid! Supposedly the most powerful force in existence ready for him to tap into, and it was about as worthless as the sun above clouds!

His lips curled into a frown as he focused back on the matter at hand, the woman now uncomfortably close to him. His legs still worked on moving backwards, but every step took him further away from the hamlet he’d spotted earlier, and he’d much rather not slog through the early morning dew and ruin his slacks if he could help it.

He took a moment to wonder why he felt the need to back away in the first place. The naked lady seemed to ignore every obvious protest in the book, including straight-up backing away, apparently! It was only when she came close enough for Hazama to feel her breath on his face that he truly looked at her eyes. At first glance they appeared normal, but if one looked closer (an art that Hazama had cultivated for years under the NOL’s Intelligence Division) then one could see something interesting. Or the lack thereof.

Nothing. That was it. Her expression was blank, utterly devoid of emotion. Her eyes were missing that spark of something that made Humans Human. Mindless, almost, by the looks of things. And potentially dangerous. Not overly so, as he was absolutely certain he could kill her before she blinked, but looks had deceived him before.

Hazama pulled out the blade he’d been fingering and jutted it towards the woman. A mildly sadistic glint sparkled in his eye as the girl stopped short, a confused and somewhat afraid whimper sounding from her lips as she took a single step back. So she recognised danger, but not unless there was something overt to cause it. Survival instincts? How curious.

Before he could spend more time ‘experimenting’ with the woman, a voice sounded out from behind him. “Polly! I was worried sick about you! You know you shouldn’t run off like that, missy!”

The slightly hoarse-sounding tone was scolding, but had undertones of fear that everyone experienced when they lost track of something close to them.

He breathed a sigh of relief. So it was fine after all. This was just some person with a mental handicap that made her act feral, and her caretaker had lost track of her briefly. With a practiced motion, he folded the knife in on itself and slipped it into his inner pocket, making to turn around before a yellow and pink blur shot past him. He blinked owlishly, head turning sideways in stunned silence.

“Ohhh…Silly girl, you’ve got dirt all over you. You’re not supposed to play over here, no you’re not. Hard Sell wouldn’t be at all happy if something from the Everfree tried to get you…” The small…thing fawned over the woman, looking up at her with what Hazama could only assume was a similar look to a mother talking down to a son who’d returned home filthy.

The creature doing the talking was decidedly small. Its head only managed to come up to his thighs by Hazama’s best estimate. It looked rather pathetic, actually. Butter-yellow fur and a bright, almost faded pink head of hair. Mane? He’d refer to it as a mane, for lack of a better word choice.

It continued to drone on and on at the woman he now knew as Polly, talking about how all the other animals at the house had seen her leave. Something in that sentence gave Hazama pause. ‘Other’ animals. As if the girl was included in that measure. Could that just be a race thing against Humans? Weirdly, the small horse thing didn’t strike him as a racist type (and isn’t that a sentence he never expected to think).

His mind raced with the implications. New world, new rules. Magic blocking his voice. No seithr, so less intelligent animals could have survived and evolved alongside humans. Humans didn’t need to think to survive and so never developed intelligence. Weird horses take over. Tapping his leg. What?

He broke from his reverie and angled his head down, blinking at the curious face of the yellow-and-pink horse. “U-Uhm. Is y-your owner nearby? I don’t think he’d like you being out in fancy clothes like that near the Everfree Forest…” she spoke in the same kind of tone that one would use when asking their pet who the good boy was.

That sealed it. Humans here were not considered intelligent. Or, at the very least, were thought of as inferior. Slaves, perhaps? Why else would it have talked about him having an owner? He continued staring at the horse, mouth slightly agape, too focused on the possibilities to realise he was being more than a little disconcerting to the small creature.

Fluttershy writhed uncomfortably, continuing to gaze up at the mysterious Human. She’d never seen anything quite like it before in her life. Ponies from Canterlot often liked to accessorise their Humans, but to the extent of getting this one a suit, waistcoat, tie, and trousers? Near the most dangerous forest in Equestria, no less! Not to mention the pricey looking hat upon his head of green hair. A completely unnatural colour.

Nothing about his appearance made sense to her. Most Humans couldn’t stand hats, and would all but rip them off of their heads. And they found any clothing more restrictive than a scarf to be infuriating, in her experience at least.

And that look in his eyes. He stared down at her, making her starkly aware of just how small she was compared to the Human. He didn’t seem all that physically powerful, though. Quite lanky and thin, though she supposed that was because Humans owned by the rich didn’t get as much exercise as they truthfully needed. At least they tended to be cleaner than most Humans, as the one in front of her proved with his shaven face. Fluttershy had to smile at that. At least he was well taken care of. His owner must have really liked him.

But that just begged the question that she’d already asked the Human himself. Where was his owner? Leaving a Human alone to wander could already be problematic, but near a place like the Everfree Forest? It didn’t make sense. She turned her head left and right, but couldn’t see or hear any sign of somepony looking for him.

And he was still staring. With yellow, almost amber eyes, blinking down at her as though utterly baffled.

Without any warning, his lips closed into a straight line, and she could see his head tilt marginally to one side. His hands moved to his waist, slipping into his trouser pockets in a manner she’d never seen before. Did he have something in there? A message? Sticks or stones that caught his fancy?

Behind her, Polly started to form a rumble in her throat, growling softly at the fancy-looking Human. Fluttershy patted her side comfortingly, wondering what was getting her so worked up. When she’d found the two, Polly had been showing signs of definite interest. Had the male turned her advances down? Probably a good thing. Hard Sell would have been very annoyed if her meticulously cultivated figure got ruined by bearing a child. But now Polly would be less than happy to be near the other Human.

Fluttershy bit her lip, looking back and forth between the two, and then off in the direction of her house. There was only one thing for it, really. If his owner had truly lost him, she’d have to take him into town later and go looking for somepony reporting a lost Human. But for now, the sun was only just starting to take its place in the sky, and she hadn’t yet fed Polly yet, as she’d had to search for her most of the morning. Perhaps this new Human would also be hungry?

“Um. Would…Would you like to come with me until your owner finds you? Are you hungry?”

The Human looked down at his stomach, as if having to physically decide whether he was hungry or not. He was just so strange. Clothes aside, his actions seemed too…Stiff. Calculated. Intelligent? No. Not quite. Obviously he was simply mimicking the way his owner acted when asked questions. Yes, that made sense.

She shook her head free of the deliberations just as the green-haired human let out a small hum and 0nodded0, stepping forward once. Fluttershy grew more confident in her theory. Obviously his estranged owner had taught him to nod when Ponies asked him things, and follow them if alone. What a smart boy he was!

Hazama, for his part, felt his masculinity committing honourable suicide.

From helping a God of Death bring about Doomsday, to following a small yellow horse with promises of food and a place to stay. In any future retelling of the tale, however, he would have it be said that he was using this as an opportunity for information gathering.

And was in no way affected by the need for food for the first time in weeks.

Author's Note

It should be a good thing that in one chapter this story has recieved almost the same amount of attention as the entire run of my other story, but somehow i'm just baffled. I guess video game crossovers are more popular, or something about this appealed just a bit more.

Though that has bought the usual unexplained dislikes, which i'm not at all upset about. I know my prose style is a bit off, I can tell that it is but i'm not entirely sure how to remedy it.

But yes, a small explanation for a given dislike would be appreciated.

But other than all that, i'm pleased that it's been received (relatively) well! More will definitely be coming.

I had the thought that to someone without much knowledge of BlazBlue, some of the terms used might fly over people's heads. So here's a small glossary of keywords. Some will probably be explained in-story later, but i've tried to exempt the ones that won't matter at all.

NOL: The NOL, or the Novus Orbis Librarium, is the military organisation that essentially rules the BlazBlue world. It regulates the usage of the main weapon-type in BlazBlue, the Ars Armagus. The organisation itself is benevolent, but a few of the higher ups, as with any fictional group, have some darker intentions.

Sheol Gate: Also referred to as a 'Cauldron', or 'Kiln'. Used to access the Boundary, allowing for time travel and travel between different 'possibilities', which are essentially alternate realities in which almost anything can occur. There are potentially an infinite number of these.

The Boundary: Is complicated. It is essentially a space of infinite information dating back to the very conception of reality, connecting every dimension. Every timeline. Normal people entering the Boundary has once been described as a fate worse than death, as one loses everything one ever was, and everything one could ever be. Only exceptional people can enter and survive.

Azure Grimoire, or BlazBlue: The titular MacGuffin of the franchise. Despite its name, it is not an actual book, but is in fact a high-density mass of concentrated 'magic element', which is not quite the same as magic in the MLP sense. It taps into the power of the boundary similar to a Sheol Gate.

When activated by its wielder, the Grimoire grants the user increased abilities in essentially all regards. Speed, power, durability, and often has another effect depending on wielder. Ragna the Bloodedge gets a massive boost to his Soul Eater attacks, and Hazama gains a ring of floating green runes surrounding his form which constantly drain the life from any nearby opponent and grant it to him, as well as making his techniques generally more powerful.

Introducing your Snake to its new home.

The way he walked made Fluttershy nervous. As one who personally disliked noise, even she had to admit that the Human beside her was too quiet. He never strayed, never lost focus and went to go inspect a flower, nothing. He was so unlike any Human she'd ever seen before. Even Polly, as well trained as she was supposed to be, had to be reminded to keep walking every few metres or so. That is, when she wasn't spending time trying to court the male Human in a manner so overt that Fluttershy was starting to flush.

He, apparently, wasn't having any of it. The first time she tried rubbing up against him, he had simply moved to the other side of Fluttershy. The second time had been a more forceful attempt, and the man had resorted to pushing her away from him.

The Pony didn't understand it. From what she could see, Polly was a perfectly healthy girl with a good pedigree and even better body for bearing young. Wide hips, but not fat. Clean skin; silky black hair, a large chest...And the man was adamantly refusing to give her even a second glance. In Fluttershy's highly embarassing experience, Humans weren't overly picky about who they laid with. And when. Or where.

That was just one of many mysteries surrounding Humans. Unlike essentially every other animal on the planet, they didn't have heat cycles. Breeding could and did happen at any time of the year, although Human women did carry their offspring for quite a while, disabling them for several months near the end of their term most of the time.

The yellow mare intently focused on the journey back to her house to prevent unbidden thoughts of the times she'd visited Applejack's farm and seen...So many things that would have reduced her to a puddle of blushing fur if she hadn't been too busy running away from the barns in question to have such an event occur.

Not that she could fault Applejack for it. A farm needed strong workers for manual labour, and Humans were perfect for the job. And even though the farm mare would ever admit it, the strongest of her Humans could probably beat out Big Mac in terms of physical strength. The embodiment of Honesty had gotten very good at breeding Humans, it turned out.

Fluttershy had her own suspicions about why she liked getting the biggest and strongest males considering that only half of them were on the field at any given time, but that sort of thinking was for thoughts only.

The walk to the house he could see just on the egde of the mist would have been a pleasant, refreshing little jaunt if not for the persistence of the feral woman he'd curbed the advances of several times over. Just when he felt he could start to relax and simply enjoy the act of walking, she'd try to draw close and wrap her arms around him. Not that she got very far. Hazama didn't get as far as he did in life by being slow, after all.

But it was enough to spoil his mood. Unable to fully enjoy the trek, he turned his attention to the horse at his side when he thought she wasn't looking, still trying to comprehend the fact that Humans were essentially dogs on this planet.

The mare, for he'd decided that she was female based on her voice and...In all honesty, she had perhaps the girliest appearance he could have possibly imagined. And he'd thought that Celica Mercury had that field covered!

His lip quirked downwards, but he recovered before his travelling companion noticed. That was one massive incident he'd rather not care to remember. The Chronophantasma was just. So. Damn. Happy. He doubted that any being alive could rival her kindness.

Fluttershy felt like somepony had just been talking about her, but dismissed the thought just in time to see Polly go for her most daring attempt yet.

Hazama sucked air through his teeth in a quiet hiss as the naked woman circled ahead, standing directly in his path and sticking her chest out as though it was meant to be impressive. In fairness, it would have definitely been somewhat so if he hadn't spent a good portion of time working with/brain controlling one Litchi Faye Ling. 'Seriously', he thought, 'How the bitch never had spine problems even after gettin' stomped into the ground...'

Fluttershy had to stare in open-mouthed awe as the green-haired male paused in his tracks, stared directly into the eyes of the woman, and casually sidestepped the obstruction, continuing on the path that Fluttershy had set.

Something was definitely up with this Human! Even the most well trained of Humans that she'd seen wouldn't have been able to shrug off an offer like that so easily, if at all! It just didn't happen!

Even Polly appeared to be utterly bewildered by his actions. It was almost sad, the manner in which she remained in her pose for several seconds before realising that she'd been absolutely denied. With an extraordinarily downcast look for a Human not normally capable of showing much emotion, she rejoined the group, trailing several paces behind at all times.

The rest of the trek to the house was done in mostly silence, pierced only by Polly's confused whines at regular intervals.

Standing in front of the house, Hazama was... Bemused, but not entirely surprised.

It was, on the one hand, one of the smallest houses he had ever seen. It seemed to be more plant than building given the giant mass of leaves and grass that made up the roof. Even with the home's diminuitive stature, there were windows at every single possible angle. He was surprised to find there wasn't a giant skylight, to be honest.

And the animals. Oh dear lord the animals. He was stunned. His world being as toxic to life as it was, he'd never seen more than a few domesticated dogs and cats as far as creatures went. But now there were rabbits, birds, squirrels, mice, and even chickens all running around outside. He only recognised some of them from picture books! There were homes for all of the animals scattered around. Holes in the ground for the rodents, burrows for the multitude of rabbits, and not to mention the birdhouses that burst from every possibly branch, twig, and bush, all filled with chirping birds of all different colours.

He paused for a moment to step forward and sideways, unblocking the bridge and letting the horse and the other Human through.

In truth, Hazama did not quite know how to react. He would be the first to admit that he wasn't a good person, which was probably the understatement of the century, but he would also claim that he wasn't quite as bad as Terumi. Now that was a hard act to beat. However, this did leave him with great indecision.

Did he try and prove to this horse that he was intelligent? Should he try threatening her for information? The latter was potentially a bad idea for several reasons. One, he had no idea what abilities this race held, and he wouldn't allow appearances to deceive him. For all he knew, the animals here were all experiments, and would leap to defend their mistress by sprouting machine guns or some such nonsense. Two, the horse might not even know anything worthwhile, making his reveal worthless and painting him as a threat.

If he proved his intelligence, what then? He had no reason to trust this horse any more than he already did, and there'd be no telling what she would do if she knew about his secret. Run away screaming about a monster Human? Sic a horde of scientists on him to try and 'figure him out'? Actually, that might not happen at all. If her house was anything to go by, the technology levels on this planet weren't all that high. Maybe she was the exception, not the rule, though. So again, it wasn't worth the risk.

No, better to keep up the act for as long as needed in order to get information from the background. It wasn't so bad: he'd had much more demeaning work to do in his time as Captain of the NOL's Intelligence Division. He still had the occasional shudder whenever the memories of his time spent scouting a nightclub for a potential rebel group resurfaced. Several weeks of getting hit on could wear down anybody's patience, and it wasn't as though he was overflowing with the stuff to begin with.

He looked again at the house, and saw the door ajar, the horse's head sticking out from the entrance and gazing somewhat nervously in his direction. She stuck a hoof out of the door, and beckoned towards her. "Y-You should come inside. The animals won't hurt you..." she mumbled, unaware that the animal's potential to hurt him was actually a somewhat legitimate if utterly ridiculous consideration he'd had to make.

Hazama spent a few seconds longer than usual to react as part of his promise to keep up the facade of being less intelligent. Groaning somewhat as he adjusted his belt, he made his way up the path until he was face to...muzzle with the horse.

The awkward silence stretched into a solid half minute. Figuring he should do something 'animal-like', he tilted his head to one side and made what he thought to be an inquisitive hum as the horse stared seemingly at his chest. His eyes trailed down. Did he have dirt on his suit? Did she want to wipe it off or something?

"I don't think you should be wearing those right now, they could get dirty and your owner wouldn't like that, would he? I should probably take them off of you..."

His eye twitched. Shit, it was the club mission all over again.

Author's Note

Shorter chapter this time, but it felt like a decent place to end it off.

Updated Keyword Glossary:

Chronophantasma: The name given to a character displaced in time. Celica Mercury is one of these, having been rescued from her death in the past in order to help in the present day.

Nox Nyctores: The most powerful sect of weapons in BlazBlue. They are, as stated, very powerful and stronger than any Ars Armagus on their own. However, most of them have negative impacts on the user's mental state. There are nine in total:

1|Yukianesa, a katana that can manipulate ice. Its blade is also formed of never-melting ice, stronger than metal.

2|Bolverk, a pair of shapeshifting guns that create instant explosions at the target location rather than firing bullets, alongside transforming into a Gatling gun, a rocket launcher, and a rail-gun.

3|Muochorin: A wand that appears to fit the size of the wielder. Its power is the creation of matter, used by its juvenile current owner Platinum to make magical weapons such as giant hammers, jack-in-the-boxes, fans, baseball bats, and missiles, among other things.

4|Ookami: A nodachi sword with the power to disrupt magical element in its target. Including magic-based regeneration and barriers.

5|Musashi: A shorter blade with the ability to cut through 'things which can't ordinarily be cut'. But in essence, it can cut through almost anything.

6|Murakumo: Has the form of a massive floating sword, but when activated it splits into eight smaller floating swords which can be mentally controlled by the user.

7|Ouroboros: Owned by Hazama, it is a chain of theoretically infinite length, tipped by a metallic serpent head. When fired off, it can drag opponents to him, be used to throw things, to bind opponents, and as a grappling hook. It can pause at any point in the air, regardless of if it has hit anything or not, allowing Hazama a massive amount of omnidirectional mobility. On top of this, it has the power to cause direct damage to the victim's mind.

8|Nirvana: A machine shaped vaguely like a woman, taller than most people even while hunched over. Mentally controlled by its user, it can extend the nails made of a very powerful material on its fingers for many different attacks.

9|Rettenjo: An anti-Nox Nyctores weapon taking the shape of a 55-inch nail. It also has the power to disrupt magic element and connections to the Boundary, making it incredibly dangerous to many of the higher-tier fighters in BlazBlue.

Dealing with your temperamental Serpent

"Please? It's for your own good, I promise..."

Fluttershy begged the Human yet again. If she didn't know any better, she'd claim that he was feeling indignated.

Ever since she started talking to animals, Humans were the ones that evaded her understanding the most. Other creatures could share pleasant conversations with her at any time, but the most she could get out of a Human was a general sense of their emotions. Even so, this one felt quieter than usual. Like a scolded foal stewing in displeasure.

That was a startlingly accurate description of what he looked like, actually. He had taken residence on the beanbag usually reserved for Harry the Bear, and had possibly the most unimpressed look that Fluttershy had ever seen, trumping even that of Twilight's reaction whenever Rainbow Dash used to break the library windows.

She just didn't understand what to do with him. He seemed to be able to follow basic commands, but anything regarding his clothes was a no-go, even though she could see patches of dampness around the ankles of...Oh, what did Rarity call that type of clothing? Slacks, perhaps.

Her eyes widened. Rarity! She was meant to be coming over for brunch at eleven! And it was currently...

Oh dear.

Hazama quirked an eyebrow as the horse performed one of the largest intakes of oxygen he'd ever seen. Her eyes had started flitting wildly around the room, and the wings on her back which he'd failed to notice before started to flutter, carrying her around the room.

"Dusty... Dirty...Oh no, no no no and I have a Human here! Two! No no no...!" Her gaze slid towards him, still seated on the beanbag like the good unintelligent creature he was.

Truth be told, he was highly paranoid of his chosen seat. The amount of animals that the horse kept, how many of them had shed fur all over it? He hadn't found anything upon initial inspection, but he hadn't been overly thorough, else he'd have drawn suspicion from the surprisingly gullible horse.

He just had to be glad that the woman had been corralled upstairs without hesitation. He had far too much to deal with without the attempted seduction, thank you very much.

Though now that he thought about it, circumstances in mind... It wasn't like he had any plans for the foreseeable future, and succumbing would help with his act...

...Hazama couldn't quite believe that he'd just considered that. Nor was he entirely comfortable with how close the horse had flown to him, hovering about a meter from his face. A hoof was placed under her chin, obviously considering something.

"Maybe...Maybe it's not so bad... I don't think you'd listen to me if I told you to go anywhere, not after I promised food..."

He resisted the urge to smirk. She was right, he wouldn't move. For several very good reasons, in fact! Firstly, 'failing' to understand some commands would help his disguise. Secondly, from the way she was speaking, she was expecting a visitor and it presented a good opportunity to observe and gather information. Third, he was kind of an asshole even at the best of times.

Now at that, he did have to smile just a bit. It wasn't every day that someone could annoy Yuuki Terumi enough for him to call someone else a prick, after all.

Of the many memories of world-threatening events that had transpired in his wake, the thought of pissing off Terumi would stay with him forever, Phenomenon Intervention be damned. The bastard deserved it.

Ragna thought he'd had it bad. And to be fair to him, which Hazama usually wasn't, the Reaper had been put through some serious shit. But Hazama couldn't bring himself to be particularly sorry for the guy after getting run through a couple of times with that stupidly sized sword of his. That, and at the very least Ragna had been under the impression he was free for most of his life, striving towards his own goals.

Hazama never had that luxury. Even if he found some of Terumi's schemes utterly hilarious and admittedly interesting, there were other things he'd wanted to do with his life. Like, for instance, using Terumi has a vessel and seeing how he liked it.

But that would never happen now, and Hazama would hopefully never have to deal with the man ever again. Even if he dived after the Boundary after him, which he doubted Terumi cared enough to do, there was a quintillion to one chance that they'd end up in even remotely the same place.

A light tapping at the door, which in some reality could be considered a knock.

The horse yelped, freezing in place even as her wings kept gently flapping.

"Fluttershyyyy? Are you in, darling?"

The yellow mare spared a glance at the Hazama, who'd taken to idly twirling his hat around on his index finger as he lost himself in thought concerning the things he'd never done back home. Fluttershy, for her part, thought that it was just his interest in the clothing that had been placed on him shining through. Shaking her head, she lowered to the ground and headed for the door.

Hazama had heard one sentence from the newcomer and already he thought he might have made a mistake in wanting to listen in to the conversation. She sounded like she spoke in the same manner as that creepy dancer guy Amane.

"I'm here...But, uhm, I think you should know before you come in that I-" Fluttershy spoke up, only to be cut off by her friend.

"Nonsense, darling! I'm not going to be upset that you haven't had time to clean up!"

The door handle started to turn down. Fluttershy meeped in apprehension, her nature not allowing her to speak up and prevent her friend from walking inside.

From around the door, a pale white face peered through, one side of her face concealed by a swathe of purple hair. To Hazama's interest, she appeared to lack the wings that the yellow one had. Instead, a horn jutted from the center of her head, twirling ridges forming a pattern in the bone.

She also had her eyes closed, a hoof outstretched as she gestured around the room. "See Fluttershy, your house is absolutely fi...ne..." the new mare spoke, her grandiose voice trailing off and getting stuck on the 'n' sound as her now open eyes met the Human in the room. Her hoof lowered to the ground.

Silence reigned for a solid minute. In between the two, Fluttershy's eyes few from Rarity to the Human at a speed that made it seem as though they were bouncing. Exaggerated beads of sweat seemed to shoot from her face, teeth grit as she gauged her friend's reaction.

The white mare, for her part, stood and stared, blinking owlishly. A Human. She knew that Fluttershy took care of Humans, sometimes, but not often. She'd also known that Fluttershy had recently taken in a female Human for Hard Sell while he went on vacation to Manehatten, but she had heard no tell of any males. But that was ignoring the biggest issue.

Her head turned so slowly one could almost hear it creaking.

"Fluttershy, dear..."

"Ohmygosh i'm so so sorry Rarity I'd forgotten all about today i'll just get him upstairs and-"

The white horse put her hoof to her rambling friend's mouth, shaking her head, the stunned expression still on her face.

Hazama shifted uncomfortably as the new arrival's gaze slid back over to him. He'd been watched. He'd been examined before. He'd been scanned before. But nothing, nothing compared to the intensity with which this horse stared at him.

"Fluttershy, dear... Breathe." The winged one did so. "Ok. Good. Now... Explain. Please."

'So. That one's name is Fluttershy. Aaand the white one is Rarity.' Hazama thought. It took every single ounce of willpower in his body to not burst into hysterical laughter. He already thought they looked girlier than physically possible, but with names like THAT?! He would never be able to take them even remotely seriously.

Rarity had to raise an eyebrow as something strange flickered across the Human's face. A twitch so small that an untrained eye would have completely missed it, but it was definitely there. It was the face of someone who'd just been told a horrible joke but was having trouble holding in laughter anyway.

She would never admit it, but she'd tuned out Fluttershy fairly quickly after her fifth apology in a minute, and had instead resorted to examining the Human currently lounging on the beanbag in the corner.

The first thing she noticed were, of course, the clothes. Were they attached to any Pony, and she'd have been all over them, gushing about every stitch. The suit was a perfect shade of black, and alongside every other article of clothing appeared to be specifically tailored with high skill to meet the client's needs. She disagreed with the long coat-tails, however, especially as they were draped over the back of the makeshift seat.

The shirt and trousers were nothing overly special, but still earned major points for working around a Human's form, which very few tailors were able to pull off. She herself might have been able to do so, if not for her disdain for the species in general.

What did catch her attention, however, was the fedora resting on a finger. It, too, looked specially made for him. The material was the same colour as the suit, but had a strip of darker black wrapped around the base.

Even stranger were the shoes. Shoes! Those were definitely impressive to see. Shoes for Ponies were much easier to design given the shape of their hooves, but Humans were much harder to work with. Even then, whichever Pony had fashioned them had done an extraordinary job.

Back to his face, however, Rarity immediately picked up on the hair colour, and tutted under her breath. Green was...Not her favourite colour to work with. Especially not a green as bright as that. His owner had been doing so well on his fashion choices up until then, too...

Fluttershy had stopped rambling soon after it became evident that Rarity was engrossed in the Human's outfit. The Pegasus let out a sigh of relief. It could have been much worse. Lucky that the Human's owner had such expensive tastes, else her friend wouldn't have had something to distract her from the fact that she had to share space with a Human.

It was no secret to their friend group that the fashionista couldn't stand to be around them. Not after what one of them had done to Sweetie Belle, definitely, but even beforehand the mare had found them dull, garish, and rather annoying. They weren't cute like dogs, and they weren't anywhere near as elegant as a cat. In short, there was really no reason to have one other than status. Even that only really applied to Canterlot.

Which is why it was odd that this Human had clothes more expensive than what most Canterlot residents gave their Humans combined. You saw one with the odd shirt or, in a female's case, a tiara, but a full getup like the one before her?

Well, if not for the fact that it was worn by a Human, she'd be a lot happier.

She glanced to the right and saw Fluttershy biting her lower lip, probably waiting for her to get angry at the lack of forewarning. To her surprise, it was the yellow mare that spoke up first.

"Are...Are you ok with it? I don't want to push him out into the cold..."

Hazama smirked internally, imagining that the white mare couldn't possibly get annoyed at a friend as downtrodden as the winged horse currently was.

"That's...That's fine, dear. I'd like to get a better look at that hat at some point today, however. I could quite easily make a line of them to fit Ponies. Imagine the possibilities!"

Hazama stopped smiling. Losing his look to horses as girly as this? Not a snowball's chance in hell.

...

Wait, did she just call her species 'Ponies'?!

If this kept up, he didn't think he'd be able to stop himself from curling up on the ground in gut-busting laughter. He got the impression that miiiiight possibly freak them the fuck out.

Which meant he was seriously considering it.

How not to care for your Snake.

"Apologise! Right now, mister!"

Hazama didn't think that...Fluttershy had it in her to raise her voice even a single octave higher, but life just kept throwing curveballs at him. Albeit, this particular one was self inflicted, although how was he supposed to know how violent the white Pony's reaction would be to him batting her hoof away when she tried to take his hat?

The yellow one had, in a hushed voice, warned the unicorn away from any future attempts, but apparently the one known as Rarity really wanted it, and so did something equal parts surprising and stupid.

A turquoise shimmer manifested around her horn, and a similar glow made itself known around his hat as well. Without further warning, his hat lifted away from his grasp as though it had gained a mind of its own, but Hazama knew better. It wasn't quite the same as what he was used to, but the presence of magic element was unmistakable.

He would have been more impressed at the telekinetic ability if he hadn't spent that particular moment springing up and grabbing the brim of his hat, dragging it back to himself quite forcefully.

What he hadn't anticipated, however, was that the unicorn would also lurch forward with his sharp tug, obviously not prepared for the strength behind his arms. She'd been sent sprawling, the wind knocked out of her stomach with an 'oomph'.

Fluttershy had done three things. First, Rarity was helped back to her feet and was checked for injuries. Secondly, Rarity recieved a scolding for trying to take a Human's possession by force. Not because it was wrong, but because Hazama apparently could have hurt her over it. The white mare had apologised, visibly miffed at having to extend that courtesy to a Human, even one with decent fashion sense. Thirdly, the pegasus had turned on Hazama, asking politely that he apologise.

How she expected a creature that was (in her mind) about as smart as a dog to apologise, he didn't quite know. But apparently she could detect that he wasn't sorry at all through some means, and had gotten slowly more irate when it became evident that he held not the slightest shred of sympathy for the unicorn.

Hazama, for his part, was utterly bemused that he was expected to apologise at all for defending his shit from a magical thief. The sad part is that he was fairly sure Fluttershy realised this, and wasn't all that sorry either, but she had to ask it of him to make the unicorn feel better.

So now the three were in an awkward triangular stalemate. Hazama wasn't sorry at all, Rarity wanted him to be sorry (somehow), and Fluttershy sided with him but still wanted him to apologise in order to not hurt Rarity's feelings (again, somehow).

Rarity was the first to break the standoff. Using a hoof and tossing her hair to one side in a well rehearsed motion, she turned her head away from Hazama and back to Fluttershy.

"Oh, don't worry about it, dear. I don't know why you're expecting an apology from a Human given that even you can't communicate with them. It was my fault, regardless."

Even though he'd taken no actual part in the brief argument other than being one half of the cause, Hazama still decided to claim that as a victory.

So, with his presence in the 'conversation' no longer required, he stopped to think about the implications of the use of something similar to magic element.

It was worrying. If every reality connected to the Boundary had magic element, then there could also be much, much stronger users of it around. Even though he definitely considered himself without hubris to be in the top 10 strongest living beings back home, slightly below Terumi and (to his chagrin) Ragna, definitely below Izanami, but above most others, that didn't count for shit if he suddenly found himself up to his neck in magic users as skilled as Nine, if not worse.

This theory was only supported by the strength and ease of the unicorn's telekinesis. Most magic users had to train for a hell of a long time to achieve that sort of level with a given spell, and the fact that this mare had used one without so much as blinking with the exertion was somewhat ominous.

Still lost in thought, he took his place back on the beanbag, taking the time to angle his hat better on his head so as to not crush it.

The two Ponies had moved to the kitchen area for the moment, a kettle having been brought out and mugs placed on saucers atop of the table, steam gently puffing upwards.

Their attention was not particularly focused on the tea, but rather they spend several minutes stealing glances (aka staring) at the Human lounging on the Bear's seat.

"So you don't know who or where his owner is?" Rarity asked, deciding that the time had come to actually take a sip of her tea, which had gone colder than she would have liked.

"N-not really. I woke up to feed the chickens and Polly, the other Human, had gone wandering off near the Everfree Forest. When I found her, she was trying to get close to...Him." Fluttershy said, gesturing again at the Human, who had now taken to spinning his hat around a finger yet again. It relaxed her, somewhat, to know that he was curious enough about clothing to start playing with it. She'd started to get worried about how stiff and dare-she-say formal he was.

Rarity tutted, smacking her lips and placing the cup back on the saucer. "My, how very irresponsible. Leaving a Human out like that, and in such fine clothing, too!"

"I-I know. That's what's weird. H-has there been anypony in Ponyville looking for a missing Human?"

The unicorn shook her head. "I don't believe so, dear. But then I don't admit to paying much attention to news about Humans."

Fluttershy sighed, keeping a watchful eye on him to make sure that he didn't decide to go walking off like Polly had. She'd made a decision about today, and wasn't sure Rarity would be overjoyed to hear it.

"I...I'm sorry Rarity, but I don't think I can go to the spa today. Not with a new Human I know nothing about. I don't know how nicely he'll play with the animals..."

Rarity took it with grace, bowing her head slightly in acceptance.

"I understand, dear, I understand. But perhaps I can still accompany you to Ponyville proper so that you can find his owner, hm?"

The animal caretaker blinked slowly. A flush appeared on her cheeks as she ducked her head down and refused to meet her friend's eyes.

Rarity quirked an eyebrow, leaning in slightly. "Fluttershy... You can't."

"I know... It's just he's so well behaved! He wouldn't be a problem at all to keep around. I...I mean, whoever owns him will come looking, right...?" Fluttershy muttered hopefully.

As much as Rarity didn't like the Human, she had to admit he seemed relatively docile. She didn't know what she was thinking trying to take something from a Human, but any other member of the species would have growled and started getting aggressive. All that this one did was take it back. Forcefully, yes, and Rarity still had no idea how he'd packed that much force into one tug, but other than that it was a perfectly reasonable reaction to have. Still, though...

The fashionista put a hoof atop Fluttershy's, smiling softly. "He does seem...Reasonably decent, darling, but he has an owner. If he's intended to be somewhere with a deadline, he needs to be found as soon as possible. In fact, he might already be late for a Human pageant, with those clothes..."

Fluttershy bit her lower lip. Everything about what Rarity said made too much sense to ignore. As much as he seemed well trained, that was just another sign that his owner had spent a lot of time getting him into shape and ready for presentation.

"You're...You're right." She conceded, crestfallen. It was a shame, really. A lot of Humans made Fluttershy nervous, but aside from being a little strange at times, this one had been pleasantly easy to deal with.

Rarity continued to look at her friend for a few moments, measuring something. Without a word, she stood up from the table and shook Fluttershy's side.

"H-Huh?" Mumbled the confused Pegasus, unsure of what her friend was planning.

"Come now, Fluttershy darling. Before you get too attached to let go!" Rarity said, the teasing grin on her face doing nothing to soften the truth of the words. She really did need to find his owner quickly, or else she might not be so willing to part ways.

Hazama was only mildly irritated to be broken from his thoughts, but he was glad to be outside again. It was still a trippy experience, getting used to life again, and he was constantly reminded with each breeze that he actually had the opportunity to forge his own path now.

It was a prettier day than he'd ever seen before. Blades of grass swayed in the wind, as if waving hello to the three travellers in the middle of the path. Some very large birds careened high in the sky, tiny dots of colour disappearing and weaving amongst clouds. The sun was unobstructed by clouds, and the earlier morning mist had been dispersed, alongside the damp dew it had sprinkled over the plants. It was a shame that Hazama didn't hold that much appreciation for pretty things, then.

Something was bothering him, and he couldn't place a finger on it. Years of experience going undercover had taught him to trust his instincts when he thought was being watched. All that meant is that his brain was picking up signs unconsciously, and he had yet to realise it himself.

The two Ponies were animatedly discussing something in front of him, and he didn't care enough to listen in to their words after he'd heard them start on the subject of spa visits. It can't have been them that were examining him, then, so who was?

He was starting to get...Not nervous. That was the wrong word. Edgy? Apart from being a general descriptor he'd heard used in reference to him before, it was surprisingly fitting now. He wasn't a fan of unknown variables; especially as the latter end of his previous life had been spent trying to crush someone who fit that description perfectly.

Hazama squinted, the sun bearing down heavily upon his body. The clothing he wore was more suited to city life, where direct sunlight was a rarity, not open treks in broad daylight. Grunting quietly, he tilted the brim of his hat downward to shield his eyes.

That was when he saw it. A shadow on the dirt in front of him. Small, circular, but growing in size. Something was approaching him. Quickly, if the shadow's growth was any indication.

'Come to think of it, those birds up there are pretty quie...Oh dear.' He thought, as his eyes caught sight of the yellow mare in front of him, specifically the wings on her back.

He could hear it now. The whistling of wind. Whatever the approaching pegasus was doing, she was doing it very, very quickly. By their standards, at any rate.

Hazama knew he couldn't dodge out of the way. Well, he definitely could, but making a purposeful dodge would require speed and attention to detail that no animal would be able have. But he doubted that something approaching as quickly as whatever this new Pony was had pleasant intentions in mind for him. And he definitely knew that he was the target, as the shadow had slid down to surround him from a top-down perspective.

From the corner of his eye, he spotted a butterfly in the field. An idea.

'I can't believe this is what i'm resorting to.' He groaned internally, making to chase after the insect.

Fluttershy jumped at least five feet into the air, yelping in surprise as something crashed into the ground behind them, making the earth rumble in every direction with the force of the impact.

The two mares turned quickly, shouting for and panicking over the fact that the Human had just been back there.

They stopped, mouths agape as their cries of fear halted in their throats.

The bottom half of Rainbow Dash was sticking out of a crater in the ground, while the Human they'd been so worried about was about two meters to the left, apparently having been running after a Butterfly he'd been distracted by. His head had turned back to the group, blinking innocently.

Author's Note

Because crossover characters getting tackled by Rainbow Dash is a cliche and a half.

So I haven't got too much to say as things are progressing smoothly, but I have decided that in the AN of every chapter (for as long as I can do so) I intend on posting a track of BlazBlue music. I'm starting with Hazama's various themes and the characters closely linked to him, but i'll branch out from there.

For now, have Hazama's character theme: Gluttony Fang (It should be mentioned that when I say 'character theme', I mean the theme that a character has when you fight them.)

That Snake is a Spy!

Rainbow Dash was having a pretty good day.

Her work for the day was done, the skies were clear, the sun was out with a pleasant warmth, and the other Weatherponies had decided to setup a game of Hoofball.

Screw napping on a cloud, wrecking her co-workers at Hoofball was way more interesting! It was, like, the best game in the world! She still held the record for keeping a ball in the air to prove her dedication to the art.

The Ponies that invite Rainbow Dash to play Hoofball do so knowing that they'll lose. It's just a matter of how much they can stand up to her

Several shots into the game, and the theme ran true.

She had possession of the ball from the moment the referee began the game, ducking and weaving under and over each attempt to remove it from her grasp. The other players in her team had, to the unyielding rage of the opposing side, decided to start lounging around on the surrounding clouds.

The game had gone 6-0 in favour of her team, and there was only a minute left on the timer. Thunderlane, by means of a goal resetting the field, had the ball, although he appeared intensely nervous of the hungry gaze that Rainbow was directing at the ball. At least he hoped it was towards the ball. If she wanted to gun for him specifically, then there wasn't much he could do to stop her.

Strangely, though, her gaze dropped from him. The whistle blew, the game began, and he took off immediately in a blind panic, desperate to lose hold of the ball before getting slammed into. When no such event occurred, he naturally found it strange, but didn't think anything of it. He even scored! 6-1, with ten seconds left! The team must have been so proud of him. If they'd been looking.

Rainbow Dash herself had looked down, intending on giving her friends down below the briefest of glances just to check what they were doing, but upon seeing the black figure trailing behind them, sneaking about, she froze. Rarity would never let a Human walk near her, not even one controlled by Fluttershy, who didn't seem to have noticed the creature at all.

Without a word to anyone, she'd taken off, barreling towards the ground at an ever increasing speed. Not quite enough to perform her legendary sonic rainboom, but definitely approaching that level.

The ground grew closer, and the Pegasus would have smiled if the g-force allowed it. The dastardly Human had no idea what was about to hit him...

Hazama watched in bemusement as his attempted attacker struggled to remove their front half from the ground.

The fact that they had been able to survive a face-first impact at that speed told him quite a bit about the durability of these creatures. Every bit of information counted, especially if he found himself needing to fight off any Ponies in the near future.

The two mares behind him surged forward after a moment of shocked silence with a cry of 'Rainbow Dash!'

Rainbow Dash? Seriously?

He was glad he'd already laughed himself silly on the names of the other two, because if he hadn't been prepared for a name like that, then he'd have collapsed in fit of laughter comparable to a seizure. Rainbow Dash. Good lord.

Hazama stayed where he was as the two Ponies dug out the Pegasus they apparently knew. If she attacked him once, then she would likely do so again, and it paid to have as much distance as possible between him and her. Of course, he assumed it was a 'her' purely because if a male of any species had that name, then they'd have legally changed it out of disgust.

They'd succeeded in freeing the newcomer at this point, the mare in question shaking her entire body like a wet dog to get rid of the clumps of dirt that clung to...Her rainbow coloured hair.

He could see where her parents got the idea for that fucking name, then.

When she was apparently satisfied that she'd done all she could to dislodge the earth from her fur, she looked around at her surroundings, potentially still dizzy from the impact as her eyes seemed to dilate rapidly, as if focusing was a chore.

"What in Equestria were you trying to do, Rainbow Dash? Look at all the dirt in your mane..." Rarity scolded, horn lighting up blue as flakes of crusty earth detached themselves from her body.

The Pegasus had the grace to wince for a moment before pointing angrily at the Human, still standing a fair distance away with his suspicious hat and suit, like some cosplayer had gotten their human involved in some secret agent convention.

"That Human was about to attack you guys! L-let me at him, I got this...!"

It was evident to even a child that the mare did not, in fact, have this. She stumbled to her feet...hooves? She stumbled to her hooves and sort of fell towards him, chin meeting the dirt for the second time in half a minute. Her friends jumped forward again to pull her up.

Fluttershy was the one to speak up, shaking her head in disappointment. "We were taking him to town, Rainbow Dash. He wasn't going to hurt us! He's very docile," she turned to face him smiling gently, "Yes you are. You're a good Human, aren't you?"

Hazama winced. He was fairly certain that a large portion of his pride had just offed itself out of shame. Getting treated like a child was not high on his list of things that he wanted his new life to include. He endured it, however, and stared blankly at the yellow horse. Taking a moment to consider what a 'normal' Human would do, he stepped 'nervously' towards the Pony cooing at him.

The last of his self-esteem fled his body when Fluttershy patted his leg.

Rainbow Dash, still held back by Rarity, stared open-mouthed, eyes flicking between the fashionista and the Human. "But...But Rarity, you hate Humans..."

The white mare tutted towards the Pegasus, shaking her head. "I don't hate every Human, Rainbow. Only the vicious ones."

"But Sweetie Belle-"

"Is not here right now, and will never have to cross paths with him." Rarity's eyes hardened, more than enough to tell Rainbow dash to drop the subject immediately, or she'd meet with much harsher words.

Hazama mulled that exchange over in his mind, analysing it every which way. He'd noticed previously that Fluttershy seemed to panic when Rarity noticed him, and the words spoken by his assaulter confirmed that the white Pony had something against Humans in general. He had no idea who this 'Sweetie Belle' was (and spared a moment to gag internally at the name) but it seemed as though she had a much larger hatred for his kind. Rarity's words implied that whoever she was, they were close to one another. A sister, perhaps?

It didn't matter overly much, but focusing on the information he was getting turned out to be a good way of distracting himself from the fact that he was playing dumb to a bunch of multicoloured horses.

God, he was itching to find somewhere isolated again. He had more things he needed to check, but absolutely couldn't do them while being watched. For example, if he still had the ability to use Ouroboros. Would the Nox Nyctores even function on this planet? He certainly hoped so, because while he was still more than capable of fighting without it, the chain was an essential part of his style.

He could vaguely hear the Ponies talking about something, so he brought himself out of his thoughts for the moment.

"-and i'm gonna be watchin' you the whole time, you got that?" the rainbow horse finished threatening, scowling in his direction.

He really needed to start paying more attention to these things.

Drawing closer to the town, Hazama felt highly reassured about his chances of survival in this world.

Primarily, the technology level was obviously far, far beneath even the most backwater areas in Kagutsuchi, including the unspoken Kaka Clan. The thatch roofs were enough of a sign, but the scattered wagons on the outskirts didn't hurt.

And if the species wasn't technologically advanced, then he had very little to fear from any scientists in this world, if there even were any.

Unless they were all just gathered in one place like Sector Seven, hidden away with a basement full of nuclear fucking missiles poised to destroy the world if necessary. And boy, wasn't that a fun piece of information. Really gave some of their boldness some context.

The Ponies in front (and behind, in Rainbow's case) seemed on edge as the motley group came closer, though he didn't see why.

"Where...Where is everypony?" spoke up Fluttershy from his left, just as they emerged into a circular clearing in the buildings, lined by abandoned stalls and marketplaces not dissimilar to those found in Orient Town, Kagutsuchi.

Hazama shouldn't have thought about that place. Now he was somehow even hungrier than before, which was a damned impressive achievement considering he hadn't eaten in what felt like weeks. What he wouldn't give for a bowl of rice from one of the vendors there.

His mind on food now, his eyes teased him by seeming to highlight the vacated baskets of fruit and other fresh produce. He impressively managed to withhold his urges, keeping his hands to himself. Except for the one apple he swiped the moment he noticed that even the suspicious Pegasus behind him had become distracted with the lack of activity.

"I don't know, darling. It's practically noon, and even Applejack's stall is empty!"

'Isn't that an alcoholic drink?' Hazama wondered idly, tossing the now-demolished apple core into a nearby bush. What could he say? He was hungry, and very quick. 'Unfortunate name conventions aside, I might have to swipe more of those apples if they're all as good as that. Oh, shit, I can blame it on my Human curiosity, too!'

Caught up in his various musings, he didn't notice that the three Ponies had stopped moving until his leg bumped into Rarity's side, who proceeded to jump backwards slightly and glance up at him with a light gasp, although she calmed down quickly.

The rainbow one was immediately beside her, glaring up at him as she threw a hoof over her friend's side.

"What'd he do? Try to grab you or somethin'?"

Rarity shrugged off Rainbow's grasp, laughing somewhat shakily.

"No, no, dear, it was just a mistake. I don't see why you're so on edge about him, when there are bigger concerns to worry about. For example, why everypony appears to have vanished!"

Hazama heard footsteps. And they were definitely footsteps, as he'd grown accustomed to hearing hooves after walking to town surrounded by the Ponies. Which meant that there were other Humans nearby. The noise seemed to be coming from behind a corner, tucked in an alleyway. Another noise, shuffling and rustling, like rifling through papers.

The others had heard it too, heading to where the alley opened into the marketplace, Hazama following behind at a reasonable distance.

The shuffling ceased as they got closer, all four of them staring into the shadowed alley.

Two Human figures were hunched over, groaning as if in pain and sifting through rubbish. One of them stopped their actions, and growled a noise to the other one. It sounded odd, especially to Hazama, who had intricate knowledge on the noises that a Human voice box should and should not be able to make.

They both clutched the wall as they stood, turning to face the group with a growl.

The three Ponies went pale as sheets, and Hazama had to quirk both eyebrows, hand trailing up to his hat in curiosity.

If these things used to be Human, it wasn't a very good resemblance. Like making a sandcastle out of coarse sand, there were bumps and boils covering their mottled green and black skin as they made that same inhuman groaning noise.

"I-I-Infected Humans!" came the cry from all three Ponies simultaneously, so loud that it almost hurt Hazama's ears.

Rarity froze in place, images flashing through her mind. Sweetie Belle...

Rainbow Dash took to the skies immediately, holding tightly onto Rarity to help her retreat, knowing that she wasn't the fastest runner even at the best of times, and this was the opposite of a good moment for her. Fluttershy was slower on hoof, yes, but she could just as easily fly upwards and out of reach, which she did almost immediately, joining her friends as they flew away as far as they possibly could.

That was the closest that either Rainbow Dash or Fluttershy had ever come to an Infected Human, but Rarity was in a much worse state. She was still frozen as they retreated, and only started to breathe normally again once the market was no longer in eyesight.

Just as they were reaching a safe distance, Fluttershy cried out in fear, holding her hooves to her mouth, eyes wide in terror.

Rarity and Rainbow Dash both asked what was wrong, the latter turning both of them around in the air to face their scared friend.

Fluttershy looked to them with tears starting to sparkle in the corners of her eyes.

"H...He's not here! I left him there!"

Author's Note

This time around for the music segment, we'll have the theme that played in the second game of the series if you reached the end of your arcade run with any character. Your opponent would be Hazama in a much more powerful form, with bullshit hidden moves and a permanant life-draining ring around himself. Fun times. Hence why the track is called Endless Despair, AKA What Fluttershy is going to feel if Hazama ends up hurt!

Making your Snake comfortable around Ponies

“It’s still awake!”

“Oh Celestia it stole somepony’s clothes!”

“It’s not knocked out!”

“Help uuuus!”

“What ‘n tarnation…”

‘This isn’t quite what I expected when I jumped into the Boundary’ Hazama frowned, still standing in place where the ropes had fallen on him. The mare holding them had not made any move to tighten them, so either she was very bad at her job as door guard, or she realised that he wasn’t dangerous. It would be a false realisation, but he’d really like her to make it regardless.

And why did a horse need ropes so heavy? If he wasn’t as strong as he was, he’d have been immediately been bowled over by the weight behind them. In fact, he should probably have done so anyway, because now it seemed to everyone watching that he was very strong.

Time would tell if that was a good thing or not.

But for now, he had to deal with the fact that at least eighty percent of the crowd was panicking over the sight of him, even though he was clearly not moving and he very much hoped that he didn’t look to be afflicted with whatever those other Humans had.

He saw one of the horses at the front of the crowd turn to the one with the end of the rope in her…Hooves?! How? There was no possible way that it could be holding anything. And yet the evidence was right in front of him.

“A-Applejack…?” the purple one asked, a barely noticeable quiver in her tone.

The one with the hat grunted in response, giving the rope another fruitless tug.

Hazama had a choice to make. Keep up appearances by falling over with the pull, or continue to stand and make everyone watching even more nervous.

What was the benefit of making them nervous? Almost nothing. It would make him more likely to get discovered, more likely to get lynched in public, and if not that then at least more likely to be restrained in a dungeon. Not that it would keep him held for very long, but it was the sentiment that counted.

In contrast, it made perfect sense that he should do as expected and fall down.

But he wouldn’t allow it. Even if nobody from his old world found out about what he did, the thought would stick with him forever that he submitted and bowed low to a bunch of scared horses with girly names.

That last part was extremely vital to his decision making.

So the horse tugged, but Hazama didn’t budge even a little bit. It made louder grunts, pulled harder than before, but still nothing.

When it got to the point that the horse took the rope into her mouth, the purple one from before stepped in, taking it from her friend with her telekinesis. Hazama was quick to note that her magic was a different colour to the horse from before.

“It’s alright, Applejack, I don’t think he needs to be tied up anyway. If he was infected, he’d have already tried to break free and attack us.”

The orange horse’s body seemed to sag as she panted for air, shooting the Human a suspicious glare from the side. Clearly she didn’t quite believe the idea that he was harmless. Smart horse.

Hazama had been studying how the purple one acted just as she turned to face him, a hoof under her chin as she drew closer, one eye wider than the other.

“But how did he bypass the lightning wards I placed…?”

Hazama winced internally. He should have guessed that would be hard to explain, and he didn’t see a way that he could assuage that particular suspicion.

The lightning bolt hadn’t even hurt, and he didn’t feel like faking it either. One tended to gain a large tolerance for lightning bolts after being opposed to Rachel Alucard for such a long time, and those were much, much stronger than the paltry trap that had been set at the door.

That by no means prevented the effects of being hit by lightning, however, and he got the distinct impression that taking off his hat would reveal a mass of now statically spiked hair, and he didn’t particularly want to see that. Not with how similar it would make him look to Terumi.

Seriously, though, he had no idea what he was going to do. If he was outed as a freak of nature in front of the entire town, then it would be trouble. Not dangerous trouble, not to him at least, but still highly irritating.

If only those other Ponies hadn’t gone and flew away at the first sign of danger, then he’d have some kind of alibi. He had liked their absence at the time, but now their swift escape served to put them somewhere down the line on Hazama’s shit list.

“Twilight, dear, no! You musn’t hurt him!”

“P-Please don’t!”

Shit list? What shit list? These Ponies were his best friends! They were the best of chums, and he was actually grateful to see somebody for once in his life.

The crowd, including the two Ponies at the front, turned their eyes away from him (thankfully) to the two Pegasi and the Unicorn that they were holding, who they quickly set on the ground.

“Rarity?” The purple one asked. The fact that her mouth hung open after saying the word was a good indicator that she didn’t expect this at all. “You’re…Defending a Human? But I thought you couldn’t stand them!”

The fashionista sighed somewhat guiltily as a large portion of the crowd mumbled similar opinions. She paused for a moment, brushing some stray strands of purple hair out of her eyes. The fast trip through the air had obviously not done wonders for her nerves. Or mane.

“I’m aware of my disdain for Humans, darling, but this one is different. He’s incredibly well behaved, and listens to commands extraordinarily well!”

“And you like him ‘cause of the clothes, right?”

“Not to mention his clo-“ Rarity trailed off, arching an eyebrow towards Rainbow Dash, who was currently reclining in mid-air, laying on nothing.

“Yes, actually,” she resumed, “the clothes are important to note. It means that somepony trusted this Human enough to wear all those expensive clothes without damaging them. Nopony spends that many bits on their Human without extreme amounts of training, Twilight.”

The purple horse seemed to consider this for a moment, glancing between Rarity, the Human, and the length of rope she was holding with her magic. She didn’t seem sure just yet.

Fluttershy stepped forward, placing a hoof on the Human’s side, prompting him to look down at her with a blank expression. The crowd seemed to suck in air all at once, waiting for something to happen. When she wasn’t brutally attacked after ten seconds, everypony exhaled at once.

“S-see? He’s a good boy, T-Twilight…” she smiled lightly towards her friend, continuing to pat the Human’s waist.

‘Urgh. Even this is getting too demeaning, but it’s far better than the alternative’ Hazama thought ruefully to himself, getting tired of having his arms ‘restrained’ but not making any move to struggle.

The purple mare thought for a few moments longer, before bowing her head with a sigh and dropping her magical control. The rope unravelled around the Human, allowing him to stretch his arms out until they clicked. The horde once again looked ready to spring forward (or backward) if he swung at anypony, but he simply grunted and put his arms back to his side once he was satisfied.

The purple one regarded him for a second, humming in confirmation of something and then turning around to check how the crowd was doing.

Hazama’s eyebrow quirked upwards, but he fixed it before any of the Ponies could notice. The purple horse had wings. But she already had a horn. From what he could see of the other townsfolk, none of them had both features. Was this one special in some way? She did seem to be a ringleader of some description. Was the leader of a village or tribe or whatever born with wings and a horn?

He was too caught up in his musings to hear exactly what the Pegasus-Unicorn was saying, but he got the general gist of the speech as the crowd seemed to relax massively, starting to chatter among themselves. Clearly whatever had been said helped to calm them down.

The purple one turned back to the trio of her friends and trotted closer, the one with the hat following not too far behind. She leaned in to the unintentionally formed circle with a hiss, holding a hood to the side in a childish attempt to prevent lipreading.

“There are still infected Humans out there! Did you see them on your way here?!” She whispered loud enough to be considered a normal talking voice. Luckily, the other town residents were busy calming down their foals or pets after the brief drama from earlier.

Twilight hadn’t been expecting her friends to glance at each other grimly. Only Rainbow Dash wasn’t frowning, but her lips were set in a straight line. A nervous chuckle escaped the Pegasus’ mouth.

“That’s…Not gonna be a problem, Twi. The Royal Guard were in the market, and the Humans were, uh, ‘dealt with’.”

The Unicorn-Pegasus sighed a breath of relief and perked up, rubbing her now-tired-looking eyes with the back of one hoof.

“Thanks Celestia… Did they have any problems with it?”

Another meaningful look between the three, and this time it was Rarity that spoke up.

“No, darling. There weren’t any issues whatsoever, because… Because the Humans were k-killed before the Guard arrived.”

The group of five Ponies stood quietly as they processed that information. Killed? Without the Guard? But who? What could have killed two infected Humans? The only one outside at the time would… have… been…

Hazama did his best to look as gormless as possible as the five horses turned to him. They had no way of pinning it on him doing it on purpose. It was the stall. Just an accident. He had been running away from the scary Humans, and they’d barrelled over the apple stand by complete chance, crushing them both. He had absolutely no reason to worry.

“H-How? How the hay did this fella…?”

Oh dear, they already suspected him.

“I-I-It wasn’t him! W-we left him all alone and scared, and h-he ran away… The I-Infected Humans got k…ki…ki… hurt by Applejack’s apple stall when they knocked it over chasing after him. That’s…What we heard the G-Guard saying, anyway…”

To everypony’s surprise, it was Fluttershy that leapt to the Human’s defence, though she struggled to get the ‘k’ word out, to nopony’s surprise. Everyone had a different reaction.

Applejack wasn’t happy to hear that her stall had to be toppled over to take out the Humans, but it was far better than anypony getting hurt, especially this new Human that Fluttershy looked quite attached to. She was, however, morbidly pleased that Big Macintosh had built the stand to be heavy enough to deal with not one but two infected Humans.

Rainbow Dash was more wary of the Human than before, staring at the side of his stupid green hair as he overlooked the crowd in the throne room. It was too convenient that both of the Humans had been killed by one falling market stand. She knew the Human was fast enough to get far enough away from the infected, because he’d managed to get away from her dive-tackle from earlier. Something was definitely up with this new Human, but she wouldn’t push her friends too hard on it. Yet.

Twilight considered this a lot of information to take in. In one day, there’d been a potential mass outbreak of infected Humans, she’d unwittingly assaulted a new Human dressed in clothes almost as formal as a Canterlot dinner party, and it turned out that the diseased ones had been defeated by an apple stand, of all things. And it wasn’t even past one o’clock yet!

Rarity was mostly distracted. She needed to find her sister. The news of the attack would mean she was probably hidden away somewhere, surrounded by the other Crusaders for comfort. The fashionista nudged Applejack’s side.

“Where might I find Sweetie Belle?” She mumbled, only loud enough for the farm mare to hear. The farmer looked to her friend with a grim frown on her lips, and mouthed ‘th’ corner at th’ back-left’. Rarity nodded, and made her departure.

Fluttershy was relieved. When she saw Twilight and Applejack holding the Human captive with rope, she panicked a bit. Ok, more than a bit. It’s what allowed her to shout out in his defence after all. It must have been the first time that most of the Ponyville folk had ever heard her speak louder than a whisper.

She wished she could call him something other than ‘The Human’ in her head, though. It seemed a little unfair. Glancing over him, a list of names ran through her mind. Billy, perhaps? That sounded like a sweet little name. But he was so formal looking, and well behaved, and…Old.

Fluttershy stopped short. How old was he? He seemed to be fully mature, and even getting on in years a little bit. But he seemed really healthy, at the same time. He had white teeth, and that alone was a massive indicator of health. Most Humans had very yellow or nearly brown shades of teeth. He also didn’t seem to have trouble moving, so no arthritis. His skin seemed clean, from what she could see that wasn’t covered by clothes, at least.

The amount of care that had been put into the Human was already a big part of convincing the crowd of Ponies that he was completely safe, but Fluttershy was just now realising how far it went.

Wait. Shouldn’t his owner have been in this very room? Wouldn’t they have come out in his defence? It wasn’t as though they wanted to get rid of their Human, not after putting this much obvious work and care into him.

Something strange happened on his face that made Fluttershy pause. She could only see him from the side, but as he’d turned to look up at the ceiling while holding his hat on his head with one hand (something that seemed to be a habit of his) something odd caught her eye.

He was smiling.

Author's Note

Not a particularly eventful chapter, but it needed to be out of the way. Some suspicions raised, some quelled, but Fluttershy's definitely peaked.

We're back with the music segment, and i've run out of themes involving Hazama specifically. While I could then do characters specifically tied to him, i'm just going to start posting tracks that I like regardless.

So here's the theme of Kokonoe Mercury, that one character from chapter one that was there for like half a chapter? Yeah.

Covering for your Snake.

After everypony had settled down and started to file out of the palace once the news had broken that the problem had been dealt with, Fluttershy had spent a while looking for the Human’s owner.

Well, to say that she’d ‘gone looking’ was misleading. What she had done was wait by the door with the suited-up Human standing awkwardly to her side. Her reasoning was that if the owner was to walk past, he’d clearly notice his precious Human, thank the mare for looking after him, and then take him home.

It didn’t happen. She stood until the palace was completely empty aside from her friends, but nopony had shown even the slightest sign of recognition towards him. Not that most of them were paying much attention: it was a much more appealing prospect to hurry home or generally continue with one’s day after the brief crisis, why would they spare any thoughts to a lost Human?

Hazama himself found the whole exercise to be frightfully boring. Of course nobody was going to come out and claim ownership over him. That was just common sense! And while he knew that the horse next to him had no way of knowing this, he still thought that anyone else would have given up within minutes.

Should he be thankful that the horse cared so much about some random Human she just met enough to wait around this long? Or, for that matter, fly back into an area with dangerous feral Humans lurking about?

He considered that for a moment. Why had they come back? Did they really give enough of a damn about him to come back to a place where they could get seriously hurt? They’d known him for, what, all of about an hour? Even less in the case of the rainbow-haired one.

Either way, he was mildly thankful that they came back for him. If they hadn’t, the whole ‘getting tied up and questioned in front of a town’s worth of horses’ thing might have gone a whole lot worse.

Except now the mare at his side was acting weirdly antsy towards him, a strange contrast to her earlier fawning over him. Not that he overly minded the lack of cutesy animal-talk. She kept sneaking glances his way when she thought nobody was looking, but upon seeing his eyes turn to meet hers, she would look away just as quickly.

So they continued to wait in silence until Applejack cleared her throat, drawing everyone’s attention. She waved a hoof towards the Human.

“So, Fluttershy. Where’d ya find him? He’s a mighty fine lookin’ breed of Human!”

The mare in question flushed lightly, partially hiding herself behind her mane. She looked again at the Human she’d been examining, who was still wearing that blank expression that all Humans shared. But that smile she’d seen for the single second it was on his face. It… Fluttershy wasn’t sure if she’d imagined it or not.

She proceeded to retell the story she’d told Rarity about how she’d found Polly missing in the morning, and had eventually discovered her approaching this Human near the Everfree Forest. From there, she mentioned Rarity reacting surprisingly well to his presence when she came to visit and her plan to take him to Ponyville to find his owner.

Then, to her shame, she had to speak about completely abandoning him when they found the infected Humans in the alley. Her friends didn’t make her talk more on that matter.

Finally, she expressed her concern that his owner hadn’t been in the palace, where every pony currently in Ponyville had ended up during the crisis.

Various hums of acknowledgement passed around the circle.

Just then, a knocking could be heard at the open castle doors, causing everyone present to look over.

Standing in the doorway was a slightly more muscled horse than Hazama had ever seen before. His fur was a stark white, just as much if not more-so than the one called Rarity, and his hair was fairly long, but unstyled, making it lay flat against his neck. It was a navy blue colour, with a lighter cyan streak along both sides, including his tail. Strangely, though, his jaw seemed a lot blockier in nature than the other horses he’d seen. That, combined with the other small details… Was this an example of a stallion?

Of course, his unspoken query was immediately answered by the Unicorn-Pegasus springing forward with a shout of ‘Shining Armour! It’s been soo long since I’ve seen you!’ as she latched around his neck.

To his credit, he took the tackle-hug with the best possible grace; chuckling at her enthusiasm and not moving an inch with the force of the affection.

“Sure has been a while, huh Twily?” He said, casually wrapping one of his own hooves around her neck in a way that suggested this was not a unique occasion to him.

When the mare tightened her grip, however, the stallion started to wince, unwilling to be the one to say that she was starting to hurt him.

Hazama would have offered his moral support, but his morals tended to be questionable at best.

“Sugarcube, I think ya may wanna loosen up, there…” Applejack as politely as possible informed Twilight that she was essentially choking the stallion.

Twilight glanced down at her hooves around his neck, and detached herself with a nervous chuckle, rubbing the back of her head as a sheepish grin formed on her lips.

“S-Sorry, BBBFF…”

“Not a problem, Twily. I’ve been away for quite a bit, so this is just making up for lost time!” He chuckled weakly, raising a forehoof to massage his throat.

Hazama didn’t know what a ‘BBBFF’ was, but he had the feeling it would disgust him if he ever found out.

Regardless, the new arrival intrigued him, and not just because he was the first male horse he’d come across yet.

No, it was the mark on his rear that caught Hazama’s eye. When he first spotted them, he thought it was just a trend shared between friends like some ‘pact of friendship’ or whatever. But this newcomer also had one, and a lot of the townsfolk that he’d seen gathered in the palace earlier had them too.

Did everyone here just get tattoos on their asses here when they came of age or what?

He had to spare an internal chuckle as he realised that the same sort of thing applied to the Murakumo units and their insignia. Maybe these were along a similar vein, and they denoted purpose or some such?

That seemed a bit far-fetched, given that the yellow horse had three butterflies as her tattoo, and the Pegasus-Unicorn had a purple star. Try as he might, he couldn’t find possible meanings behind the mark. But then, no outsider could have figured out the Murakumo units’ symbols either.

“So why’re you here, Shiny?” The purple one grinned again, standing side-to-side with the stallion.

‘They’ve got to be doing it or something. I mean she’s almost as clingy as that shitty Murakumo doll.’ Hazama thought, feeling much more out of place than usual as he leaned against a wall outside of the circle that had formed around the newcomer

“Uh, officially? To respond to a potential outbreak of infected Humans and to deal with the threat as the crown has deemed necessary.” He spoke, puffing out his chest in a grandiose manner. But afterwards, he dropped the act, smirking again. “But off the record, I’m here to keep my little sister and her friends safe.” The stallion wrapped a hoof around the Unicorn-Pegasus’ side as he mentioned the ‘little sister’ bit.

Hazama almost choked. ‘Siblings?! Christ, looks like she’s trying to get him into bed or something, the way she’s acting. Or murder him, one or the other.’

Maybe she was more like the thirteenth Prime Field Device than he had initially thought…

“Well that’s mighty kind of th’ Princesses to send someone like you to help, but aint there more of ya?” Applejack uttered appreciatively regardless, tipping her hat towards the stallion.

Shining Armour waved a hoof dismissively. “It’s not just me! The other members of the Royal Guard platoon are securing the two escaped Humans and investigating the cause of death.”

Twilight turned her head towards her brother in a confused manner. “I thought that Applejack’s stall, uh, ‘dealt’ with them.” She mumbled, still finding it a little freaky whenever Shining Armour spoke about death in such a professional tone.

The stallion tutted, glancing out the open door in the direction of the market.

“That’s what finished them off, yeah. But… This stays between you five and me, right? I’m not technically supposed to share this detail until we know what’s going on properly.”

The mares all made various noises of acceptance.

Shining Armour nodded, and continued.

“It turns out that, apart from the fractures and injuries dealt by the stand falling on them, great construction work on that thing by the way Applejack, it turns out that they were already pretty severely injured.”

A collective gasp came up from the circle as Hazama tried to sink more into the wall, suddenly not quite as confident in his work.

‘Shit! I didn’t know they’d be getting a goddamn Royal Guard squad out here. Hell, I didn’t even know they had a Royal Guard!’ Hazama groaned internally, realising that he’d been too careless.

A flicker of movement caught his eye, and he looked to the left a little bit.

He was discomforted to find that Fluttershy was staring right at him, a frown on the edges of her lips.

She knew something. She definitely fucking knew something! It made the shiftiness towards him earlier make so much sense! But why wasn’t she saying anything about it to the rest of her friends?

Was she…Protecting him?

“Injured? How d’ya mean? I sure as hay hope you ain’t implyin’ that mah farm is mistreatin’ our Humans” Applejack glared, hoof steadying her Stetson.

“No no no, nothing like that!” Shining Armour was quick to respond, waving a hoof in a placating manner, “I mean to say that they’d already had a tussle with something or somepony before they died. One of them had severe bruising on his neck, and some bones were broken as well. The other one’s head was barely…Uh…” He trailed off, noting how green Fluttershy and Twilight were looking. They got the point.

Applejack nodded, satisfied that he wasn’t trying to belittle her farm, and Rainbow Dash turned her glare to the room’s other occupant.

Oh great, now the rainbow-haired one was giving him the evil eye as well. Hazama didn’t get the impression that she knew precisely what the yellow one suspected, but the experience of him ‘conveniently’ managing to avoid her dive-tackle earlier had obviously made her less-than-accepting of him.

It was Fluttershy that spoke up next. “W-What…What do you think did it, Mr Armour?” she whispered.

“We don’t quite know yet, as I said. It’s why I shouldn’t really be sharing details with you.” Shining Armour shrugged, wishing that he himself knew the answer to their questions. As if he hadn’t been stressed enough with Cadance being summoned to Canterlot to deal with some emergency or another, now he had a mystery of his own to solve.

Fluttershy spared a strangely sympathetic glance towards Hazama, flinching as the Human visibly tensed up at her stare, before making her voice heard again.

“I-Isn’t it a good thing that something was attacked and got away?”

She shrunk back as Shining Armour fixed a curious look in her direction, alongside her friends. She calmed down, however, when he fixed her a calming smile.

“It’s not that we’re saying this is a bad thing in and of itself, but the fact that something not known to the Guard was able to fight off two very well built infected Humans seemingly without injury is…Disturbing. We just want to know who or what did this, and gauge whether or not they’re a threat.”

The explanation seemed to quell Fluttershy’s fear. The question hanging in everypony’s mind, however, was ‘why was she nervous to begin with’?

Hazama understood what she was doing, and appreciated it greatly, though he’d never say it to her face even if he was capable. She’d gotten the information he needed straight from the source.

He couldn’t trust it outright though. This stallion was part of the Royal Guard, which sounded distinctly like it was overseen by the rulers of the land, which he assumed to be a Monarchy of some description given that the cowboy stereotype horse had spoken about Princesses.

He was keenly aware that ruling organisations were not to be trusted in any regard. He would know; he’d been part of a tyrannical order’s plot to destroy the world before. For all he knew, these Princesses were planning to do the same, though he doubted that they would go about it in quite the same way.

“W-Well, if it’s alright with everypony, I want to go home now, and… And welcome this one into his new home.” Fluttershy piped up after a few moments of silence. Upon seeing everypony’s shocked and questioning expressions, she elaborated. “I mean… If his owner wasn’t here, and I found him hanging around the Everfree Forest, then maybe… Maybe h-his owner is… Is… Isn’t coming back.”

‘Everypony? Really? Isn’t that somewhat non-inclusive?’ Hazama wondered to himself as a distraction from the obvious problem at hand.

The yellow one knew much more than he’d like her to, and from the look she sent his way as she beckoned him forward to follow her home, he was going to have a lot of acting to do if he was to convince her of his dumb, animalistic nature.

Resisting the urge to hold his hand on his hat and sigh deeply, he trudged forward, taking immediate note of the stallion's curious expression that flickered out of existence within an instant of him noticing it, and the rainbow-haired one's clearly disdainful glare.

This could be trouble.

Author's Note

This chapter took a while to come out, and I think that's going to be a precedent for sundays, as I have quite a bit to do during them.

I don't have much to say about the character this theme belongs to, other than the fact that he's drunk a lot of the time and has a habit of being a womaniser, as well as also being one of the strongest players on the protagonist's side.

No, he is not a ripoff of Qrow from RWBY, believe it or not.

Incorrectly identifying your Snake's breed.

The walk had not been a comfortable one thus far.

Both parties knew what subject needed to be broached, but neither was willing to be the one to say it, the Pegasus due to nerves and the Human because if she didn’t actually know what Hazama thought she knew, then him revealing himself as intelligent would only confirm her fears.

And hell, he didn’t even know if she knew what he thought she did. Her suspicious glances could have been for an entirely different reason as far as he was concerned.

Out of habit, he closed his eyes and rested a hand upon his hat, slipping the other one into a trouser pocket as he walked by her side. The horse glanced at him again, unsure whether or not he could actually travel with his eyes shut like that. When he didn’t bump into anything within a few minutes, she uneasily left him to it.

They’d made their way past the market, the horse having lead him skirting around the edges to make sure they didn’t come across the scene of the attack, though she did stop briefly to pick up an apple from the basket Hazama had placed on the floor earlier. He didn’t know whether the avoidance of the market was because of her squeamishness, or the questions they might get asked by the Guard.

He had thought he’d covered his actions so well, too, but he hadn’t at all considered the fact that a whole squad of armed horses would show up. In retrospect, it shouldn’t have been surprising, but Hazama had thought the technology level of the world too low to get a message out in times of duress.

Should have known those winged horses would have had their uses, as well as the magic that thirty-three percent of the population seemed to have. It was a tad jarring to have so many regular citizens be adepts in certain types of magic, whereas people in his world considered it fairly exclusive to have enough aptitude to wield an Ars Armagus.

That was another thing. Outside of the massive crystal-whatever-it-was, the town looked like a generic small hamlet. If the residents here had magic that was decently strong, he imagined the people powerful enough to live in the city up on that cliff in the distance would be a larger concern.

And it also reminded him vaguely of the Hierarchical Cities of his home-world, so going up there would have to be written down in the calendar in order to check for other similarities.

He noticed that the yellow horse he’d been following had stopped in the middle of the road, squinting up into the sky. Following her example, he glanced up, and saw nothing but sky. The clouds were a bit close to the ground, but nothing out of the ordinary. Yet the Pegasus seemed to hum and frown as she examined whatever she’d seen more closely.

She eventually decided that whatever it was didn’t concern her, and shook her head, continuing on her path but only after sending another look back in his direction.

He wished she’d stop doing that and actually get to the point of what she wanted to know. That way he could decide if she needed to be silenced or not, or if an escape needed to be made.

Silently, Hazama hoped that it wouldn’t come to murder on his first day in a new world. The whole point was to start anew, damn it!

But if the horse showed any signs of trying to purge him from the world as a freak of nature, he’d gladly show her why she had every right to be afraid of an intelligent Human.

She’d stopped again, annoyingly. Right in his way, causing him to bump into her side. She froze up when he did so, turning her head slowly to look up at his bemused expression.

Right after he took a step back to break her free of whatever spell she’d just come under, she gawped in his direction, swiftly correcting herself when she caught him staring.

Hazama grew somewhat concerned when she turned around fully to face him.

They were in the middle of the road between the house the horse lived in, and the town they’d just left. Nobody was around as far as he could tell, and he could tell quite a lot. So no ambush… It was just them, the sky, and the ground beneath their feet. The wind caused the coat-tails on his suit to flap aimlessly as silence pervaded the space around them.

Without a word, the horse drew the apple she’d taken earlier out of her bag and, retaining purposeful eye contact with him, grasped a nearby leaf and placed the fruit on top of it. She put the makeshift plate onto the floor between them, backing away once the work was done.

Hazama cocked his head to the side, eyes opening properly as he wondered what exactly her game was. This could be a trick of some sort, but what? Obviously she expected him to take the apple, but why the leaf? An animal wouldn’t have cared if the fruit was slightly dusty or not.

He took a step closer, carefully watching the horse’s expression as he bent lower to the ground, hand hovering above the apple. Not wanting to look too cautious, he quickly swiped the apple, holding it up in front of his face.

The Pegasus seemed to be holding her breath, waiting for him to do something, so he took a bite out of the side, humming slightly when he confirmed that it was as juicy as the last two he’d eaten. Still no change in her demeanour, so he took another bite. Then another.

And he kept going until the apple was just a core, but the horse still seemed expectant of something. Clearly expecting him to do something that implied intelligence or a civilised nature.

So instead what he did was absently drop the core to the ground, letting the slightly browning fruit land on the dirt. The horse exhaled, and looked down at the apple core. Then back up at him, taking shuddering breaths.

“Y-You… You d-didn’t eat the core.”

‘Oh shit.’

“You seem to understand everything that’s going on…”

‘Fuck.’

“Y-You’re comfortable with clothes....”

‘Fuckfuckfuck’ Hazama hissed internally, legs tensing as he prepared to make a break for it, into the treeline that wasn’t too much of a distance away. He had no doubt that he was faster and stronger than this horse, or any other horse for that matter.

The horse sucked in oxygen again, and pointed a shaky forehoof in his direction, taking a step back, and then another.

“You’re a Changeling!” She cried out, looking as though she was about to bolt in that very instant.

‘Time to get the hell out of- wait, what?’ Hazama paused, processing just what had been said.

What the fuck was a Changeling? Judging from the name it was… Something that changed. And was also a ling. Hell if he knew. It was obvious that whatever a Changeling was, it scared the living daylights out of the horse, given how she was shuddering so hard that it looked like she was vibrating.

He assumed a Changeling would shapeshift in some way, so apparently she thought he was disguised as a Human to murder them in their sleep or something. He could do both of these things quite easily if need be, so she was half right, at least.

“T-That’s it! You’re here to e-eat our love!”

…

‘Excuse me, I must have misheard that. Thing with my ear, been with me all my life. It has the tendency to flare up whenever something retarded happens. What manner of bullshit did you just say to me?’ Hazama groaned audibly, rubbing his left temple with two fingers.

‘Eat our love’. That was just… So unimaginably fitting with his perception of these fucking horses.

Of course, something that can disguise itself and slip around unnoticed does not kill in this world. Nope, they ‘eat love’ and that’s what they’re scared of.

He just… Needed a minute.

He got to five seconds.

Then his head tipped backwards, causing him to have to hold his hat atop his head. He took a deep breath. And then he started laughing his ass off.

It took a lot of Fluttershy’s willpower to not scream in fear when the disguised Changeling started guffawing.

The sight was terrifying. Humans should never be able to laugh, and this confirmed her Changeling theory.

Rows of teeth, unlike any set she’d ever seen on a Human. As white as she’d previously seen, but now she could make out different shapes, much different than that of a normal Human. The middle group of shapes and the teeth next to them were serrated and pointed, respectively, designed for biting and tearing away at meat rather than plants.

They were wide open with the force of the creature’s laughter, and it frightened her to death.

That sound just didn’t fit with anything she’d ever heard before. It sounded… Manic. Like someone had just heard the biggest and greatest joke in the world. It was high pitched and very loud, making Fluttershy wince whenever its voice peaked.

There were tears leaking out from the sides of his eyes, and while she took it as the thing disguised as a Human expressing even more joy, Hazama was in fact crying while laughing, lamenting the fact that this was the type of world he was stuck in for his new life.

Where pastel coloured horses were scared of the love-eating boogeymen.

She didn’t know why she hadn’t run, yet. If she was still around when it stopped screeching in laughter, it would surely attack her, hypnotise her, and take her away to its hive where she’d never escape and be trapped forever and she wouldn’t know because she’d be slowly getting all the feelings drained from her body and oh Celestia why did this happen why did she not tell the others what she suspected she was going to die.

The laughter had stopped during her panic attack, and she noticed that the thing was looking at her with an odd expression, like a teacher looking with false interest at an awful drawing that a child had made.

Another last bout of chuckling escaped its lips, which was far more manageable than the uproar from earlier.

It seemed to be looking around for something, patting the pockets on its suit until its expression finally brightened, dipping into the pocket on its torso and pulling out a notepad and pencil.

What was it doing? Was it scribbling a crude diagram of what it was about to do to her? Oh Celestia, that was it, wasn’t it!? It was going to taunt her with pictures of her crying friends never being able to see her again, the fiend!

With one last private giggle, it tore the small sheet of paper from the spine of the bad with a ripping sound that made Fluttershy flinch again.

When it handed it to her, she read words that she absolutely wasn’t expecting.

‘My name is Hazama, thank you very much, and I assure you I’m definitely a Human. Also Changelings sound… really stupid, just thought I’d throw that out there.’ It read.

She looked up at the Human, who had an utterly bemused expression on his face, the ghost of a frenzied grin quirking the left side of his lip.

Just as she made to comment on the absurdity of a Human that could write, she spotted a blur approaching from above and behind him, out of his line of sight.

It was Rainbow Dash. So she had been hiding on the cloud she’d spotted earlier! She didn’t trust her to make it home safely? That was a little presumptuous of her.

And then she realised that she’d shouted her suspicions to the sky earlier, believing the two of them to be outside of the earshot of any listeners. Her jaw dropped open.

The Human’s expression quirked awkwardly as she stared in horror, until he focused more on where her eyes were facing. He let out a loud groan, rolling his amber eyes.

And then he promptly jumped to the left, just as Rainbow Dash came shooting past him with a cry of ‘Gotcha now, dirty Changeling!’ and then promptly impaled herself into the ground like a javelin.

Fluttershy shouted her friend’s name, and held a hoof out in surprise, unable to do much more thanks to the combined shock of the past three minutes, when a slip of paper was again pushed into her view.

‘If she asks, there was another butterfly.’

Now it was Fluttershy’s turn to giggle.

Author's Note

50 likes, good lord. This got way more attention than I could have hoped for, and i'm glad people are enjoying it!

Today's music segment comes from yet another character who appeared in the first half of chapter one! This time featuring Rachel Alucard, the Vampire who is also a little girl who is also a magician that keeps reality running smoothly.

BlazBlue is weird.

Snakes are not Insects!

It confused him somewhat that he was glad to see the horse laughing softly at his ‘words’. Being ‘glad’ or ‘happy’ wasn’t something he could often attribute to himself. ‘Content’, perhaps occasionally, but even then only very briefly.

He supposed that it was more relief than anything. Having at least one person/horse on his side would likely be a boon. His disguise wasn’t overly helpful anymore regardless, given how quickly the suspicions would have mounted if he’d continued to fail at acting dumb. Having her less paranoid was likely more beneficial in the long run.

Nevertheless, he left her with the piece of paper and turned to focus on the Pegasus that had yet again ended up in the floor. Though muffled, he could plainly make out the fact that she seemed to be cursing loudly over what he’d done.

Her head popped out of the ground after one solid pull, leaving her purple eyes rolling in their sockets. She shook her head, clearing the dizziness from her vision, and glared at the suited Human angrily. One forehoof scuffed at the dirt like a bull preparing to charge.

“You get away from my friend right now, buster! And no playin’ innocent, I heard what she said!”

Hazama stared, frowning in some form of disgust. It was his first day on this new world, and it felt like more than a week with the shit that he’d been put through. None of it particularly dangerous thus far, but very, very annoying.

With a groan and an imperceptible rolling of his eyes, he stepped back into the middle of the path, realigning himself with the horse after his leap.

Did she really think this was going to work for her? After the last two times he’d blatantly avoided her attacks without so much as caring? She must have known how fruitless this was, especially since, if he was an evil love-eating monster or whatever, he’d have already taken the yellow one out before she had time to scream?

Then again, logic didn’t seem to be a strong aspect of these creatures, so what did he know?

“U-Uhm, R-Rainbow Dash, he’s not actually a C-Changeling…” Fluttershy murmured.

She didn’t expect her friend’s expression to morph into one of horror, her eyes going wide and pupils shrinking with fear at the seemingly comforting phrase. The yellow Pegasus cocked her head to one side, confused.

“O-Oh no! It’s got you under his spell already! Don’t worry, Fluttershy, I’ll getcha free!”

Both Hazama and the yellow horse facepalmed at the same time, though luckily for the former Rainbow Dash was too busy staring at her ‘possessed’ friend to notice his action.

This was going to be one of those times where every possible explanation would be discarded in favour of attempted assault, wasn’t it?

‘Well, at the very least it’ll be fun to have someone as dumb and angry as Rags to fuck around with.’ Hazama thought, smirking internally as he thought of how easy it was to rile the self-proclaimed ‘Grim Reaper’ up. Turns out trying to kill him and all his friends and family would do the trick. Who knew?

“N-No, it’s really not like that, Rainbow Dash! I-“

“Nah, I ain’t listening to the lies he’s making you say! Just hang tight, Fluttershy!” The blue Pegasus snorted, waving her hoof in the air dramatically as she cut off her far more reasonable friend.

Fluttershy huffed in rare irritation, wishing not for the first time that her best friend would spend more time listening and less time acting. But in any event, there wasn’t much hope in convincing her friend with words anymore, not when she got in the ‘heroic’ mood.

Biting her lower lip in apprehension as an idea came to her, she turned to the Human that had called himself Hazama. Hazama. What a strange name, not like anything she’d heard an owner call their Human before.

But then a few things slotted into place for her. Things that she hadn’t had the time to run over in her head because of how fast Rainbow had swooped in to save the day.

She’d found him alone at the edge of the Everfree Forest. He had a full set of expensive clothes on, and seemed fully comfortable in them, navigating pockets and even writing things on a notepad. The writing thing could be passed off as something taught to him as a way of introducing himself to strangers, but that didn’t explain the way he acted. Calm, without needing any collar or guidance. This Human was intelligent. Not like a pet taught to do fifty different tricks, but like a Pony. The laughter and smiling was just the nail in the apple stall.

Which is why what she was about to ask might very well be considered rude.

After the events at Princess Cadance’s wedding, she had spent time researching Changeling physiology wherever she could for both defensive purposes and in case one ever ended up in her care. That last part was never mentioned to her friends, but she had learned over time that the Changelings had been dying out for the past century, and only a few scattered hives remained. As a result, they’d been much more desperate this past decade, fighting and conquering when before they’d not dared risk it.

So she’d garnered some knowledge and a lot of pity concerning the Changeling race, which was the reason she’d thought Hazama was a confirmed changeling before.

One such piece of information that she’d learned was something concerning their disguise function, which she’d also noticed when her friends had to fend off a wave of Drones at the wedding.

“Haz…Hazam… Uhh, excuse me?” she whispered, feeling a barely noticeable shudder run up her spine as the Human turned to gaze at her.

Hazama himself was curious. She’d tried and failed to pronounce his name, which he didn’t overly blame her for. His name was outside their understanding of names, so it was understandable. It sounded like she had a question to ask, though, and she didn’t seem too confident about it.

Taking a moment to lean sideways and avoid another speedy-but-reckless charge by the rainbow-maned horse, he pivoted on his heels to properly face the yellow Pegasus, shooting her a questioning look as he didn’t feel like wasting more paper or spending time writing things.

“Oh dear this is going to sound bad, but um, I think you need to, err… Let her hit you…” She said, trailing off with a flush on her face near the end of her sentence, refusing to meet his eyes. For good reason, too, as he fixed the top of her head with a highly disbelieving stare.

Hazama took a deep breath, and counted down from five, exhaling at ‘zero’. If any of the other horses he’d met so far in this world said that to him, he’d have had some kicking to do for even suggesting such a thing. But so far this one had appeared to be the most reasonable, outside of maybe the white Unicorn. He was willing to give her the benefit of the doubt and let her explain herself.

Fluttershy waited until she heard Rainbow Dash make another easily avoided charge, cursing as she went, before daring to look up and continue.

“It’s just that… Changelings lose their disguises if they get hurt...”

Now he understood. The rainbow bitch seemed to be too dumb to be convinced verbally, and he’d much rather someone like her didn’t figure out what he really was. Taking ‘damage’ seemed to be the only opportunity to solve this problem.

The yellow horse had cringed back, expecting him to get offended by the suggestion. Now, he was, but he’d dealt with much worse blows to his self-esteem than suffering a ‘loss’ to the bull-headed Pegasus.

It’s not like he would actually get hurt regardless. He had taken hits from Sector Seven’s Mad Dog and got up afterwards, and could go toe-to-toe with Terumi, weakened at the time though he was due to his lack of a vessel. Any damage this technicolour horse could dish out was minimal in comparison to those two, especially the former.

Seriously, he didn’t know how Azrael was that freakishly strong, but that was one scary son of a bitch. And he had been holding back at the time. Substantially. Hazama had to hand it to Kokonoe; managing to contain him must have been one of the biggest undertakings ever. Second only to maybe the things that Izanami and Terumi were plotting.

So yes, he’d have to swallow his pride and not dodge the next pass. While it wouldn’t hurt him at all, there was always the risk of getting his suit dirty, or losing his hat. Neither of these things were ideal, but one of them was at least avoidable. With a sigh, he plucked his trusty hat from his head, leaving his mop of green hair open to the world, having recovered from the earlier electric shock.

Fluttershy opened her eyes when something pressed itself on top of her head, squashing her ears quite uncomfortably. The Human (Hazama, she had to remind herself) had removed his trilby and placed it between her ears, the brim pressing them downwards.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Rainbow coming back around for another pass and, judging by Hazama’s grimace, so could he.

With a weary-sounding sigh, the Human turned and stood back in the centre of the road, making sure to look in her direction constantly for some reason. Making sure she didn’t run off with his hat, perhaps? He did seem rather attached to it…

“Now I gotcha!” the cry was heard, the figure of Rainbow Dash swiftly approaching the Human from behind.

He had just enough time to widely roll his eyes before he got crashed into, sending both parties flying through the air until they landed on the dirt many metres away, an action that made Fluttershy wince as she started to gallop up the path to their landing site.

Rainbow was laying on her back atop the Human, who had somehow spiralled around in the air to be facing backwards towards the direction of Fluttershy as he lay belly-down on the ground, lips in a hard, straight line. She’d find out later that it was the dirt now clinging to his white shirt that was making him more upset than the impact itself.

The main difference between the two, however, is that only Hazama appeared to be fully conscious. Rainbow Dash herself kept struggling to roll off of him and stand up, but kept flopping onto his back, groaning all the while.

“I…Did it…I got the Changeling…!” She huffed, finally managing to swing her body up onto all fours, her knees bending and wobbling continuously, but she was stable for now.

“Oh my, Rainbow Dash, I think his Butterfly flew away before you hit him…” Fluttershy whispered before she could help herself, clamping her hooves over her mouth after the words escaped. A shade of pink appeared on her cheeks when Rainbow looked at her friend very strangely, before chuckling hoarsely herself.

“H-Heh. Good one, ‘Shy.” Rainbow Dash grinned, before looking down at the now-grumbling Human with a frown, “But now what’re we gonna do with the Changeling? We can always take him to the Royal Guard in town, get ‘em to take him to Celestia and get banished to the sun or something cool like that!”

Fluttershy groaned. She hadn’t considered that her knowledge of Changelings wasn’t common. Of course Rainbow didn’t know how their disguises worked!

“Rainbow Dash… Changelings lose their disguises when they get hurt…” she whimpered, wondering how upset Hazama was going to be when he came to the same conclusion as her.

The blue Pegasus, for her part, simply stood with her mouth agape for a moment in the breeze, looking slowly between her friend and the Human she’d just spent the last while attacking, and had just bowled over.

“Oh. So… No banishing to the sun, then?” Rainbow Dash half-whined, still running with adrenaline after the battle, if one could call it that.

Fluttershy shook her head, accidentally dislodging the hat on her head and sending it down to the ground.

She could hear Hazama let out a louder, not-faked pained groan when it landed in the dirt

Author's Note

This chapter... Is shorter than most. It's been happening quite consistently that my chapters are growing shorter ever since the 2.6k chapter I wrote with the fight scene.

I promise that the length will pick up soon, but I keep coming to suitable ending points and (if I may confess) my weekday writing happens in my free time at College, so there's a bit less time to consider what I could add to a chapter to increase the length.

But yeah, it won't get too bad, and I always aim to have a chapter hit at least 2k words per chapter (with one exception), so it'll never dip below that. This much, I can absolutely promise.

Now nobody's commented on any of the music segments yet, but since it takes almost no effort on my part, i'm still going to keep going. And when I run out of BlazBlue tracks I like, i'll post other game soundtracks like UNIEL, Guilty Gear, and other things like that.

For now, have the theme of the strongest mortal in BlazBlue, Jubei...The Cat! With dual swords!

Communicating with your Snake.

“I’m really really sorry, I didn’t mean to!” Fluttershy pleaded, standing in front of the Human that happened to be sat down and giving her a deserved hard stare. She returned it with an equally intense pleading look, eyes wide and trembling. One could almost hear emotional violins in the background urging him to be forgiving.

He raised an eyebrow in her direction, the two beings now at eye level. No, he would not submit. He would not falter; no matter how sad those eyes looked. After the things he’d done in his life, getting a mildly upset stare from a horse was not on the list of things that would affect him anymore. Almost destroying the world tended to restructure that particular hierarchy.

In truth, Hazama was mostly keeping up his façade of anger as a way of keeping the horse’s mind off of the bigger problem of his existence in general. If she kept focusing on ‘The Incident’ then she wouldn’t have time to freak out.

The fact that his hat had been able to fall on the floor in the first place was also strange to him. That thing could stay atop his head while flying through the air, while jumping and flipping around, while fighting: it had never once come off unless he had intended it to.

Stupid horse-shaped heads and their lack of hat sustainability. Stupid self for not keeping the hat on regardless. Of course it wouldn’t fall off! If Ragna with his Azure Grimoire couldn’t have done it, then a flying horse was nowhere near able to do so.

Whatever. Mistakes were made, and now he had to make the horse suffer for just a little bit longer before the apology seemed legitimate.

So they waited. One well-dressed Human sitting on crossed legs across from a yellow Pegasus who was begging for forgiveness.

‘Did her eyes just get even sadder or am I seeing thing now?’ Hazama thought, casually reaching into one of his inner pockets to pull out his notepad and pencil, starting to scribble a sentence.

The horse seemed to flinch when he started writing, eyes tracking the movement of his hand. So maybe she wasn’t quite ignorant of the fact that she had a massive anomaly in her living room. But that just begged the question as to why she had continued to cover what he was from the rainbow bitch. He had his own reasons for not wanting to reveal himself, obviously, but why did she?

After the charade of pulling him up off the ground, they’d had to think very quickly to make up an excuse for Fluttershy’s earlier screaming about Changelings. The story they/she’d come up with, was… Less than ideal, and probably only worked because (in Hazama’s mind at least) the residents of this planet were far too trusting.

As the story went, Fluttershy had been training him to respond to her if she were to ever shout about a Changeling threat. Rainbow Dash had been only mildly suspicious at first, because apparently Humans on this planet already had an intense distaste for the creatures, disguised or not. They supposedly had some instinct that allowed them to disregard a Changeling’s disguise when in their presence.

The rainbow one, already pretty sheepish from tackling over what was apparently a perfectly normal non-Changeling Human, had decided to let it go and run with the story she was given, though it was clear the belief was not complete, which Hazama was only able to glean from the slight inflections in her voice when she flew away.

That and she paused to give him the evil eye when Fluttershy wasn’t looking but that’s entirely beside the point.

Back in the present, Hazama realized that he’d stopped writing as he recalled the events of the day, and had been absentmindedly pressing the tip of the pencil down too hard, causing it to break off. He looked up from his lap to see if he could request something else to write with, but the Pegasus wasn’t where she was a moment ago.

Instead, she was sat at a table several meters away, staring at him from between the forehooves that covered her face. She was also shaking in what appeared to be either excitement or trepidation.

He could hear her muttering rapidly to herself, able to make out phrases like ‘Intelligent’, and ‘Not real’, but there were also slightly stranger words that came up such as ‘Discord’, and ‘Elements’. Everything else was a jumble of incomprehensible murmuring or was too quiet to hear.

‘Ah. I suppose the whole ‘Intelligent Human’ thing is finally catching up to her.’ Hazama shrugged, picking up the broken tip of the pencil and grasping it between thumb and forefinger to write with that instead. He scribbled out his previous message that he’d been making, and underneath it wrote the words [Is everything alright?] before tearing the sheet off and standing up to walk over to the table.

Sliding out a chair at the opposite end, it wasn’t quite designed for a Human back but it was serviceable enough, and either way he took his place facing the horse. Planting the note on the table, he used two fingers to slide the note towards the gibbering mare.

She became silent, and looked down at the words as if barely comprehending them. The words seemed to swim on the page. Irrefutable proof that everything she thought she knew about Humans could very well be wrong and she could barely read it through the spinning sensation in her head. What would Twilight think? What would the Princesses think? How many more Humans were there that could think and feel just like them? Just like Hazama, with names equally as strange to pronounce.

If intelligent Humans became a trend, what other implications did that have? Would cats and dogs start to be smart as well? That thought sent a shiver down her spine. The mental image of all of her cute animal friends one day looking up from their breakfast feeding and demanding to know why she was enslaving them ran through her head.

So many questions, so many terrible things, but for now… For now she should be focusing on the one sapient before her rather than the hundreds of possible ones.

“I…I’m alright, thank you Ha…Haza…”

The Human in question grunted, reaching over the table to pull the piece of paper back to his side of the table, turning it over and jotting more words on that instead.

Fluttershy blinked when it was sent sliding along the table again, looking down and vaguely mouthing the instructions written on it.

[Hazama. Say it like this: ‘Has-Armour’. Or ‘Haz-uh-muh’ if you really want.]

Several minutes passed where he could hear her mumbling both methods under her breath until she apparently found one she was satisfied with, nodding along with newfound confidence.

Finally, she had a way of talking to him without calling him ‘the Human’.

“S-So, H…Hazama. What are you? I’ve never heard of an intelligent Human before! Did your owner teach you?” She asked.

Hazama caught the unspoken question, and shook his head. Swinging his legs up to rest on the corner of the table, he placed his hat on the table after brushing a few grains of dirt onto the floor. It didn’t make that much difference to the overall cleanliness of the place. Not with the amount of animals that came in and out as they pleased, at any rate.

Fluttershy passed him the paper again, and got it back a few seconds later.

[I don’t have an owner. I’ll have you know that I-] Fluttershy paused, seeing something furiously scribbled out to the point of piercing the paper, but the sentence continued nevertheless, [I am completely self-sufficient.]

It seemed like a bit of a weak ending to cover up what he had initially written, but he would keep the whole ‘other world’ think a secret. Even if they couldn’t do anything with the knowledge, because they weren’t even remotely close to the technology level required to interact with the Boundary without essentially dooming themselves. It was an unstable science even with the appropriate equipment.

The Pegasus spent a good while simply looking at the Human, idly wondering how she hadn’t realized he was different beforehand. Actually, that was a lie. She had noticed the various quirks that set him apart from others of his kind, but had passed them off as a multitude of coincidences. Now that she could look properly, there were key things that just weren’t right.

Manner of sitting aside, the hair colour was absolutely off. It could have been dye before, but Fluttershy could see that it went down to the roots too now that he had removed his hat. The clothes were another obvious pointer, and the way he required no guidance should have been a massive giveaway. Even the most trained Humans couldn’t walk around without a collar and leash.

There were some other details that she needed to know, however.

“If it’s not too rude to ask… How old are you?’

He seemed to consider that for a moment, before the Pegasus yet again received the slip of paper.

[I don’t know how you folks measure time around here, but in my own scale I am twenty eight years old.]

Fluttershy gasped, literally flying out of her seat to hover in front of his face, looking him up and down for any sign of disease or advanced aging, but found nothing. Upon noticing Hazama’s slightly bemused look at her reaction, she sunk down again, but still looked to be very concerned.

“But…But Humans don’t live for that long. Seventeen is the age of a very old Human! And you seem so healthy…”

‘Ah shit. Of course. They’re animals here, they aren’t going to live as long as we do! Now I have to think of an excuse for this. Wonderful.’ Hazama grumbled internally, writing slowly and purposefully before showing it to the horse.

[Well then I simply can’t explain it, but my lifespan can potentially go up to the hundreds if I take good enough care of myself. I apologise for not having a clearer answer for you, miss… Flutter shy, if I’m not mistaken?]

Fluttershy shook her head slightly, “It’s just one word. And it’s ok. But it must be so very confusing for you to be treated like any other Human.” She said, and then thought about what she just said. “Actually… Where did you come from, Mr Hazama? Why were you standing near the Everfree when I found you?”

Hazama winced. There wasn’t any way he could bullshit out of this one. He had to have grown up somewhere after all, and he didn’t think ‘inside the forest’ was a viable option for several reasons. That only left him with one option.

Locking eyes with the shy Pegasus for a few moments, he let out a purposefully wistful and slightly pained sigh, swiping his hat and placing it back on his head. After writing out his message and passing it to her, he clasped his hands together, sitting in a hunched position over the table.

[I would…Really rather not talk about it. It’s…Painful to think about, I’m sorry.]

His decision to say this was based on the idea that from what he had observed so far, these creatures seemed to be highly emotion-based rather than logic-based, making decisions around their feelings rather than facts and common sense, as demonstrated when they simply let the suspicious suited Human go after three Ponies told them he was ok. Any rational leader would have kept him for questioning or for the Royal Guard or whatever to examine.

The Pegasus gasped at his written words, covering her mouth with her hooves before floating over to him, patting him on the shoulder comfortingly.

“O-Oh my, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to bring up anything you were uncomfortable with…” she whimpered, before pausing as the Human in front of her let out a small, amiable chuckle which set her mind mostly at rest.

Knowing how the drill went at this point, she looked down at the paper he’d been writing on.

[It’s quite alright, miss Fluttershy. You had no way of knowing, and your curiosity is more than understandable. I am an anomaly, after all.]

She sighed in relief over the fact that he wasn’t offended. Looking over at Hazama, he seemed to slouch in his seat even more, letting out a yawn that he tried to stifle with a fist.

Tiredness. Fatigue. Things that he hadn’t had to worry about for so very long, the events of the past few weeks of his life having given him no time to rest, and the power of Terumi ensuring that he never needed to.

But now the sleep debt was catching up to him, and his eyes felt heavier than usual, even if he did keep them shut for most of the day. Another yawn escaped his mouth and the horse to the side of him looked in his direction somewhat pityingly.

“Oh my, you must be so tired after today… But I don’t have any spare rooms for you.” She said, casting a glance around the room to see if there was anywhere he could rest.

It was only just dusk outside, the events of the day feeling like a week of action to both of the creatures at the table.

Fluttershy was about to suggest that the beanbag he was sitting on earlier in the day might be a good place to rest until she could find a spare mattress, but when she turned to relay the information she found the Human’s head already against the table, hat moved to cover one of his ears. He’d fallen asleep on the spot.

She shook her head, and went to go and check on all the animals currently living with her to tell them not to disturb the Human at the table.

Hazama blinked, and he found himself in a wide, purely white room with seemingly no end in all directions. The only solid surface was the floor.

He looked down. His clothes were still there, and from what he could tell everything else was in order as well.

A wide, uncontained smirk spread across his lips, and his eyes opened to face the void.

So his ability to lucid dream had transferred over to this world too, it seemed. It was a skill that he hadn’t had much time to cultivate as of recent times, so he was glad to see that it still worked.

The dream world had always been his one and only solace from Terumi in the days before the main plan was set in motion. Not because he couldn’t enter his dream, no, but because he had much bigger things to worry about than the dreams of his potential vessel. That, and Hazama was in total control of his dreams ever since he could do so lucidly, so the ghost proved no threat.

Flexing his mental muscles, he conjured up the image of his office in the NOL’s Intelligence branch, omitting the door that would allow anyone entry.

Sitting at his desk, he summoned a plate stacked with hard-boiled eggs; the objective best food in the world, as far as he was concerned.

Plucking one from the cup it was served in, he popped it into his mouth and swallowed it whole, bringing his legs up to rest on the wooden surface as he did so.

Shutting his eyes to fit his usual expression, he allowed himself to properly relax in the only place in any reality that he would be allowed such luxury until the moment he would be needed in the waking world once more.

He could figure out the whole ‘new world’ shtick in the morning.

Author's Note

So here's this. 11 Chapters in, and we finally reached the end of the first day.

It won't take nearly this long for each individual day, don't worry about that.

And for the ever-unnoticed music segment, we have the theme of Susanoo. That's... All I can say about it, really.

The Bigger Pony and the Snake.

Princess Luna was the ruler of the night, bar none.

She could glide effortlessly throughout the world of dreams, an array of minds below her twinkling like stars hidden behind mist, dim spotlights in the night as she roamed the strange plane of existence to aid as many Ponies with their nightmares as she could.

There was not a single being alive with power over dreams even approaching her own, and she knew it, too.

Which is why it was distinctly odd that she found herself somewhat stumped by a dream that she seemingly could not enter.

She’d been drawn to it simply because it existed at the time that it did. Not many Ponies went to sleep at this time, and those that did were usually younger colts and fillies, but from what Luna could tell, the Pony behind this dream was fully matured.

It was also not visibly either a pleasant dream or a nightmare. Both had distinct appearances from the outside, either a pleasant rainbow of colours or a mass of void-like darkness, and this one fit neither bill.

It had the appearance of a large, stark white sphere. Blank, and plain, but with tiny whispers of colour flittering around inside at random times.

This was clearly a lucid dream, and the perpetrator was in full control, but that still didn’t mean that she could be denied entry, so something else was going on here.

The only way that something like this could be occurring is if the Pony behind this particular dream had developed incredibly strong mental fortitude and an aptitude for psychology that would allow them to so deftly control their own mind. When faced with something like this, the best option would be to simply leave it alone, as the dream did not appear to be malicious in nature.

But Luna still desired entry.

Call it pride, call it indignation, it didn’t matter. Somepony had denied her specifically entrance to their dream, and that wasn’t something she considered to be acceptable. Not when the dream did not seem to belong to anypony she was familiar with.

And that was worrying, too. Whoever was behind this dream, she’d never seen anything like it before. Worse than this, however, is that it seemed to come from the abode of the Element of Kindness, and why would there be an unrecognised presence sleeping at her house? She didn’t want to judge the mare for anything, but one night stands were unbecoming of an Element bearer.

Unless it had been going on for a while, but that couldn’t be possible. Any relationship that one of Twilight Sparkle’s friends made always seemed to get to Celestia somehow, who would then be the one to regale her with the story. It was quite an efficient way of getting unofficial reports from the town that they usually rarely heard from in an official capacity.

Regardless, Princess Luna wasn’t entirely sure how to go about gaining entry to the dream. Of course it might be considered rude to enter, but she rationalised it in her head as simply examining a potential threat to her people. ‘Nothing to hide, nothing to fear’, after all.

So she worked on it for what felt like an hour, poking and prodding at the defences. No response. That was good, because it meant the mental barriers were incomplete. A proper master like herself would have a multi-layered system of walls, mazes, and traps to ward off any attacker. This Pony had evidently settled for erecting one, solid barrier like a brick wall to obstinately refuse any and all contact, which meant that whoever was inside had no idea that the defences were being probed, which meant they were unprepared.

Every wall had its weakness somewhere, and even though she briefly left the dream be in order to check on the nightmares sparsely popping up from foals who had been put to bed by their guardians, her mind was always on that blocked-off dream until she could return to it and prod more.

Several hours later, and the night had full reign. Nightmares and dreams appeared flashing in the realm like beacons, filling the void with light and darkness both.

And yet the only Pony around to notice them was distracted, having felt herself draw closer and closer to whatever weakness the dream before her had.

There! A small chink in the armour, or more accurately a mental weakness potentially born from stress, anger, or a mixture of both. Whatever the reason for its existence, the fact remained that it did exist, and was therefore exploitable.

Her horn lit up with a deep purple and black corona as she dipped her head down, almost bowing to the dream. The great wings at her side lifted outwards, angling back in preparation. The Princess mumbled a few incantations to herself, words that would give her the power necessary for her intentions.

With a final sentence, the ruler shot forward, her horn thrusting into the invisible fault she had detected.

The hard grey shell surrounding the dream splintered and cracked around the hole as Luna pulled her head back to watch her hoofwork. Shards of the transparent barrier fell away like glass, flashes of colour revealing themselves underneath the cold exterior.

It didn’t break completely apart, but there was now a decently sized hole in the shield. Taking a moment to breathe and compose herself, the Princess congratulated herself for her feat. It had been a long while since she’d had to exercise her more offensive dream-based abilities, but she still had the prowess to utilise them.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Luna stepped slowly into the dream.

Space expanded around her, the mindscape bending and inflating as she forced her presence into the mind of the Pony behind the dream. It sounded like a more violent process than it was, but it was honestly the only way she could explain it to those who weren’t versed in dream magic. Namely: every Pony alive minus her sister.

Colours brushed the canvas, matter and gravity took hold. Shapes formed in the grey and eventually the Princess found herself in… A room.

A fairly odd room, yes, but a room nevertheless. The walls were mostly a royal blue, as was the floor, The skirting boards and trims along the corners of the walls a bright gold. She found herself facing a double-door, large and wooden.

She had been expecting something more…Grandiose? Why would somepony bother to shield a dream from her if they weren’t doing anything wrong?

“Get out.”

The voice came from behind her. It didn’t sound particularly happy to see her. So Luna turned, intent on soothing her subject’s fear of her intrusion when the words caught in her throat.

A Human.

A Human was sitting at a wide desk, surrounded by discarded egg cups and, oddly, paperwork. He had clothes. An expensive suit. A hat! Green hair, and a definite frown on his face… Luna started to chuckle, realising what was going on.

She’d seen dreams like this before, where Ponies imagined how they would look if they were Human. Usually the effect was quite funny, seeing a Human with thoughts and feelings. It was like imagining a pet goldfish that could speak in a Canterlot accent. Amusing.

It also explained a reason why the Pony behind the dream didn’t wish for anyone to see it. They must have been embarrassed of the fantasy! It was a fair assumption. Somepony knowing of your desire to imagine yourself as a Human must have been an embarrassing thought.

“Hm. Very strange. I believe I told you to vacate my dream, but you’re still here. Do words mean opposite things in this plane?”

Ah yes, and he wasn’t particularly happy with her. She would forgive the blatant disrespect from her subject for now, as she had technically… Well, she had literally broken down the door and let herself in.

“Peace, my subject. I mean you no wrong. I merely caught sight of your dream and grew curious as to why one of my subjects would be required to obscure their mind.”

His expression shifted to something Luna had never seen on a Human’s face before. His eyebrow quirked and his face tilted very slightly to one side as he started to lean on the desk with his… the parts of a Human’s arm that she didn’t know the name of.

“That’s not what I asked, but whatever. You’ve cracked the code, figured it all out, opened the tomb and found what you were looking for. Now if you’d kindly, ah, leave?” He said in a deadpan tone, waving her away with his hand as a Noble might do to one of lesser social class. As he spoke, he slipped one of the eggs in front of him into an inner pocket in his suit with his free hand.

“Do not take such a tone of disrespect with me! I shall roam around dreams as I please, as my birthright dictates. If you wish for me to exit, then thou shalt enquire politely, or remain silent!” Luna fumed, glaring at the rude Pony disguised as a Human over the desk.

She looked rather like a schoolfilly, arguing with the head-teacher from over his desk. Except most students did not have full mastery of the Royal Canterlot Voice.

At his rather unimpressed look, Luna realised that she’d blown things far out of proportion. This intrusion was completely her own fault, and that gave her no right to shout over his irritation.

“Apologies, good stallion. ‘Twas unjust of me. If you truly wish for me to vacate, then I shall.” Luna inclined her head faintly, before turning around and spreading her wings, preparing to take off. Pausing briefly, she looked over her shoulder, at the Human façade that now appeared to be examining a row of eggs. He glanced up when he realised she was watching him, “Be wary, however, that if you take such a tone with me again, there shall be consequences. I wish you pleasant dreams for the future, and please note that fantasies such as this are not anything to be embarrassed about. I believe shall take my leave now.”

She prepared to fly, but his voice came from behind her, sounding distinctly smug in a manner that made her feel the sudden urge to hit him.

“No need. I can oversee your departure, and my own, by my lonesome.”

And then, to Luna’s surprise, the dream broke, melting away into pools of colour, then the remnants of shadows, and finally nothing at all. The Princess was left standing in the dream realm yet again, blinking in surprise.

He had forced himself to wake? He dared to essentially kick the dream-ruler out of a dream in the only manner possible?

There would be repercussions for this, if she ever were to meet the stallion in the waking world. And then Luna froze in place, eyelid twitching in anger. She never did figure out just who that Pony was!

But now the day was nearly upon her, and she had no time for her thoughts to linger on a rebellious stallion. For now, at least. Her sister would absolutely be hearing about this. She would laugh at how she’d been essentially pranked in her own world, yes, but she would hear of it regardless.

Hazama woke up with a scowl on his face.

His dreams were not supposed to allow entry to anyone. And that horse… That damn Pegasus-Unicorn bitch had just waltzed in like she owned the place, violating the one place that he could be in control.

He couldn’t even properly enjoy speaking again! Floating off in the Boundary, he’d been in a state of semi-consciousness, and was unable to speak just like on this planet, so he hadn’t heard his own voice in weeks.

And now in the one place he could actually be himself and indulge in whatever he desired, there’d be some fucking horse watching over his every move. Who the hell did she think she was? Some Queen or whatever? She had that wing/horn combination like that purple one in the nearby town, but what did that mean?

A trail of sunlight was present on the floor several meters away, trailing upwards at a crawl as the sun slowly rose over the horizon. Hazama continued to ponder to himself, even as the chirping of birds outside heralded the morning.

‘Even my dreams aren’t safe anymore. Always on guard, always having to look over my shoulder, always having to keep myself hidden…’ He grumbled internally. ‘This must be how Rags felt.’

“Oh! Good morning, Hazama!” came a pleasant trill to the left of him. He lifted his head from the table he’d apparently dropped asleep at, and turned to look at the yellow horse. He hadn’t been expecting her to be up this early. Was it just a thing with the horses here?

Nevertheless, she looked completely awake, if slightly haggard and dirty. What had she been doing?

She was hovering a little off the ground, clutching a bucket of something strange-smelling in her forehooves just a small distance from him. She had obviously been practicing pronouncing his name, because the confidence she displayed when saying it was far greater than the evening previous.

To Hazama’s confusion, the horse put the bucket down on the table in front of him, where he realised it was actually a bowl of some description. A food bowl. For pets. He shot her a strange look. Was he supposed to eat whatever this was? It looked like the kind of food someone would give to a baby.

“Is…Is it ok? I would have given you a plate instead b-but I don’t really have any…” the horse mumbled, losing some of the strange confidence she’d held seconds before. She seemed to be tapping her hooves together expectantly, like a chef waiting for a critic’s review.

His review was that whatever food this was smelled bad, looked bad, and he would be willing to put money on it not tasting overly pleasant either.

And hell, even if he wanted to eat it, he didn’t think he’d be able. He felt strangely full after the dream’s interrupted session of eating his boiled eggs. It was as though he’d actually eaten them, and it wasn’t just imaginary, but that was ridiculous. It must have simply been placebo from eating his favourite food.

He was about to write down an apologetic suggestion for a different type of food to be served instead, when he realised that he didn’t want to request anything that might be considered strange for a Human to eat, just on the chance that some random other person might come round for a morning visit. It was unlikely, but so was literally everything that had happened in his life, so the chance was not to be taken.

[In my dreams last night, I was rudely interrupted by a dark blue horse with both wings and a horn. She seemed a bit taller than the rest of you. Why is that? Who was she, and what does the wing/horn combination mean?] He jotted down, hoping to move the subject away from the strange food he’d been served.

Judging by her reaction, it was the correct choice. She gasped quietly, and her eyes moved away from the bowl entirely.

“You were visited by Princess Luna!? Were you having a nightmare? Oh, you poor thing…” She said, immediately fawning over the Human that had suddenly stiffened in his seat.

He’d told a Princess to leave. A Princess of the land had seen him, a Human, dreaming. A potential ruler had the ability to look into dreams. Wonderful. Just wonderful. Almost as wonderful as the annoying lump in his suit pocket. One of his knives must have turned at an odd angle in the pocket while it was folded up. He couldn’t fix it now, not without the horse getting curious.

He had larger concerns than an irritating bump in his suit, however. He didn’t know how much time that Princess spent around her subjects, but the fact remained that she had seen him in his dream, and now she knew what he looked like. Luckily, she apparently assumed him to be a horse dreaming of being a Human, so he was safe for now.

But if news of a strange Human in a suit ever reached wherever the Princess dwelled, then she would know. Know that what she had seen was no mere fantasy.

So now he had to lay lower than ever. It shouldn’t be too hard; all he needed to do was stay out of sight and not draw attention to himself.

To his side, the Pegasus had stopped her concerns and had started talking about purchasing more things that were suitable for Humans if he was going to start living there properly. He had no idea why she assumed he was staying, but free room and board was not something he was going to turn up his nose at.

Speaking of turning noses up, he could really do with a shower. He hadn’t had the time to have one for a rather disgustingly long time, and while he had never technically needed one over the last couple of weeks due to the constant Phenomenon Intervention messing with space and time, he personally didn’t feel too clean.

He communicated this need to the horse, who paused for a moment before telling him where the shower was, which Hazama confirmed he’d heard by listing them off again.

When asked if he would like his clothes washed, however, Hazama flinched. How was she going to wash his clothes? Machine, or hand? The same question went for drying, too. He really didn’t want her to wash them at all, actually, as his clothes stayed mostly clean due to the Magic Element weaved into the fabric. But she wasn’t to know that, and he would rather his magic aptitude be kept a secret for now.

So he’d accepted her request with extreme reluctance, telling her that he’d leave his clothes in a pile outside the bathroom door. She looked at him oddly at that, but for what reason he couldn’t decipher. It didn’t matter, though. A shower would do him a world of good.

A few minutes later, Hazama found himself unsurprised but still extraordinarily disappointed. Of course it was designed for their height and not his. Oh well, his non-existent heart was set on a shower now, and depriving himself would only make him more frustrated. He’d just have to hunch down really far and make it work.

He set to work on taking his clothes off, feeling strangely relieved to be free of them for the first time in a while. It was somewhat liberating. Before putting the pile outside the door, he quickly reached into the pockets and pulled his knives out, placing them on the side of the sink. No use in making one of the few horses on his side suspicious, after all.

Fluttershy hummed amiably to herself as she wandered upstairs.

Hazama seemed to be quite polite, and her animals had all taken their food without any arguments this morning. She was surprised to find that the Human was up in the morning, though, as most of the Humans she'd kept in her life stayed asleep until mid-to-late morning.

She came up to the upper floor once she heard the shower start to run. It was always obvious when it was turned on, because some of the pipes rattled for the first half-minute after opening the faucet. As expected, Hazama's pile of clothes was folded neatly outside the door, with his hat placed neatly on top.

Reaching under the bundle, she lifted it up as she took flight, allowing her to carry the pile with her forehooves. It was slightly awkward, but it was less so than trying to carry objects as an Earth Pony, even if she'd never let Applejack hear her say that.

Just then, something round fell from inside the suit, bouncing off of the floor as Fluttershy gave a startled yelp and jumped back.

After nothing rose up from the pits of Tartarus to swallow her whole, she risked approaching the thing. The closer she came, the more confused she got, until she was directly in front of it. Picking it up, she turned it around in her hoof, examining it from all angles. It seemed perfectly normal, but there was one question flying around in her head.

Why in Equestria did he have a boiled egg in his pocket?

Author's Note

I solemnly apologise if the word count tricked anybody into thinking this was an action-packed chapter. It isn't, but it had to be done.

If it wasn't already assumed, words between brackets like these '[]' are words that are written down.

Sidenote, i'm occasionally overwhelmed by the amount of likes this story has gotten, especially when I check the newly update section and see stories of over 100k words only have around 13 likes.

I guess people like the story or something! How very strange.

Something something unnoticed music segment something something. Here' Celica Mercury's theme, 'Crystal Forest'.

Of Rabbits and Serpents.

Hazama narrowed his eyes. The rabbit currently occupying his seat did the same.

It was quite impressive, actually. The white creature came up to a bit above his ankles, but it apparently had no qualms with giving him attitude. As if to emphasise this, the bunny crossed its arms and looked away with a humph, to which the Human got the distinct urge to punt the creature across the room.

He got the feeling, however, that he would get some grief from Fluttershy over that one. She seemed oddly attached to this thing, and somehow thought that it could do no wrong. Hazama knew better, though. He knew that this rabbit was a creature almost as vicious as Terumi.

And now he was picturing Terumi as a beastkin with long, floppy rabbit ears and a cottontail. And now he was chuckling to himself. He could never have gotten away with thinking these things in his previous life, and the feeling was quite liberating.

It had been about a week since his arrival in this world, and still he had no real idea what he was going to do. He had no game plan, and lacked the knowledge he needed to formulate one. Taking over the world was a no-go, because it sounded ridiculously boring once all was said and done. Going on a killing spree was not the best plan either, mostly because he was still unsure of the capabilities the residents of the planet possessed.

There just wasn’t much to do, and he had expressed to Fluttershy the other day that he didn’t wish to go back to the town for a while, not until the Guards left.

They both knew that he was the one who’d dealt with the infected Humans, but neither of them addressed the topic out loud, obviously realising the awkward questions that lay down that path. She’d seemed understanding regardless but was somewhat concerned about leaving him at her house during the days where she’d have to leave. Not because she thought he would hurt or get hurt by any of her animal friends, but because she thought he might get lonely.

Lonely. Wasn’t that an odd thought? Someone in existence who didn’t want to slaughter him for his deeds or use him as a pawn in a larger game. This was obviously subject to change if the horse got even the slightest inkling of the things he’d done and almost done back in his own world, but it was still a weird experience.

The horse had overcome her anxiety over leaving him behind when she returned one day to find him playing a game of cards with her pet rabbit, happy that he’d found something to interact with.

She had no idea. No idea of the stakes involved in that game. The winner would claim the beanbag for the following evening, and the loser would have to take the floorboards. The rabbit was a damn good player, and had very few tells to speak of. It had chased him down to the last hand, where Hazama had pulled out the secret technique of cheating. Sleight of hand born from a long-ass time of slipping knives in and out of pockets in less than the blink of an eye had prevailed that day, giving him the card he needed to win the hand, and therefore the game.

That bunny. That damn rabbit was the most fearsome opponent he’d ever faced in a game of cards, beating out all the other Intelligence officers that had once worked under him except maybe the airheaded squirrel beastkin who wasn’t actually airheaded at all. But if that weren’t emasculating enough for his past underlings, the rabbit’s name was ‘Angel’.

To his dismay, however, the rabbit had absolutely dominated the next game, possessing extraordinary luck and cheating abilities. Hazama caught him messing with the shuffle once or twice, but after what he’d pulled last game he really didn’t have room to complain.

Let it never be said that Hazama had no honour.

That, and when he tried the first time he lost to ignore the rules and sleep on the beanbag anyway, he had found himself woken up by means of a gang of animals tossing bits of their food at him. Dry food, luckily, because he didn’t want to give Fluttershy another reason to try and wash his suit.

The evening after was a different story entirely. The mare in question had returned from the town yet again with news that didn’t bode well. The Guard, claiming that they had deeper suspicions that had to be looked into regarding the infected Human incident, were apparently extending their stay.

They knew he was here. Two of the armoured horses had come by the other day while Fluttershy was thankfully out in the village. In an entirely coincidental manner, Hazama had been upstairs in the bathroom, out of any window’s view. He could still hear them mumbling vaguely to each other, though.

When he’d told the horse later that day, she had nodded, as if she’d known it was happening. The Captain of the Guard, Shining Armour, had remembered the strange Human from last week, and had decided that he was one of a few ‘prime suspects’.

Shining Armour. Shining Armour. Hazama found himself constantly surprised by how irritating the naming conventions were. Everyone on this planet seemingly had a name that just happened to fit what they did or their personality. Fluttershy fluttered around, and was shy. The stupid bitch of a horse apparently called Rainbow Dash was rainbow coloured, and dashed fast, according to the planet’s standards. What if their parents named their son ‘Shining Armour’ and he’d turned out to be a baker or something?

He was being investigated by a creature literally out of a child’s fairy tale who also happened to have a fairy tale name. This was what he had been reduced to.

So that was essentially his week since the initial rush of insanity: playing cards with a rabbit, with some of the other animals very occasionally joining in; sleeping; showering; and lounging about while he thought about what the hell he wanted to do.

The Princess had yet to follow through on her promise to return to his dreams, but Hazama still had not let his guard down regarding what he did while asleep. No use in imagining kicking Ragna’s ass if the Alicorn (Fluttershy had told him the actual title for the ‘Pegasus-Unicorns’) was watching from the shadows and making judgements.

On the plus side to all this, the food on this planet was a hell of a lot better than the stuff back home. He had no idea how the yellow horse had managed to guess his favourite food, but after looking at him strangely for a little bit on the first morning after his shower, she had asked him if he would like boiled eggs for breakfast.

Weird and lucky guesses aside, far be it from him to deny the real version of his favourite food after dreaming about it.

She’d been very confused to see his usual method of eating eggs the first time, apparently not expecting to see him open his mouth and swallow the egg whole, shell and all. When she mumbled that it reminded her of watching snakes eat, Hazama refused to comment and instead ate another egg. Nevertheless, she continued to provide eggs in various forms every morning. Occasionally scrambled, sometimes fried, but usually boiled.

And now, after the entire week, he was being blocked from his seat by his greatest opponent on the planet.

‘I won, unfair-and-mostly-square, you little shit.’ Hazama wanted to say, tapping the steel toe-cap of his shoe against the floor, but the sealing magic inside his throat still held strong. He’d spent quite a lot of his free time (which was essentially all the time) studying the magic and how much different it was to Ars Magus. He had quickly come to the conclusion that even a slight activation of the Azure Grimoire would be infinitely more than enough to rid himself of the seal, but he had no way of doing so without his voice. Of all the facets of his being to get sealed, his voice was the absolute worst one.

Angel continued to glare from his seat, making Hazama more and more irritated as time went on. The rabbit had grumbled and groaned over losses before, but he’d always kept his word. He didn’t know what made today different, and he was intent on finding out.

He slipped a piece of paper in front of the rabbit, simply saying [Can you read?], to which the rabbit paused, blinking in confusion for a moment before nodding several times. In all of their games, Hazama had never once needed to communicate like this. Vague hand gestures and grunts of varying emotion were good enough so far. [Right. Then what on Earth’s your problem?]

The rabbit regarded him for a moment, looking up and down as it let out a tiny sigh, slapping its paw against its face. To Hazama’s bemusement, Angel started miming holding a hand of cards, even mimicking the intense stare that the two often sent each other when playing a particularly tense round. Then he made to pick up an imaginary card from the deck, before making an exaggerated swerving motion to put the invisible card at the bottom of the deck, and then picked another from the top.

Ah. He had thought that might have been it. The rabbit had looked very suspicious after he tried that cheat out, but he hadn’t been sure if he’d been spotted until Angel confirmed it. Without missing a beat, Hazama nodded while he scribbled another note and handed it over.

[Don’t get indignant with me when you do the same thing.] He’d written, to which the rabbit looked up and gave him a pair of wide, sad eyes in an attempt to profess innocence. Hazama snorted. [Your owner’s way better at that than you are, buddy. Just like I’m way better at cards than you.]

Angel wasn’t happy about that last comment. Fixing him with a glare worthy of Ragna’s most hateful moments, the rabbit whipped out a deck of cards seemingly from nowhere, and Hazama had to reconsider the tier list concerning sleight-of-hand experts. That deck had definitely not been anywhere within view beforehand.

He idly wondered if the rabbit would be more annoyed if Hazama allowed himself to write what he wanted to say properly, but for the sake of appearances he had to act polite, if antagonising, on paper.

Hazama was about to write a note accepting the impromptu challenge when a forceful knocking came from the front door, loud but still within the boundaries of politeness. Hazama quirked an eyebrow. It was too early for Fluttershy to return just yet, and she also wouldn’t be knocking at her own door, let alone so loudly.

Angel looked up at him, equally as apprehensive. They seemed to be on the same wavelength in thinking that this was suspicious. All of her friends would know that Fluttershy was in town today, so why would any of them come to the house? The answer is that they wouldn’t. And by the sound of the knocking, the visitor wasn’t here for a friendly chat.

A silent agreement formed between the two, a bond born from a week of intense reading of each other’s expressions. The rabbit was present or within earshot during all discussions that Hazama held with Fluttershy, and knew that the Guards were not particularly on his side. Apparently Hazama had made a good enough impression on the bunny to get the creature to cover for him whenever the guard swung by. That didn’t stop Angel from irritating the hell out of him at times, but it was better than getting revealed to the Guard.

Without further communication, the rabbit hopped up from the beanbag, allowing Hazama to immediately replace him with no complaint. If it was the Royal Guard, he didn’t want to be seen walking around, as that would imply that he had a reason to be doing so. Lounging around in a spot of obvious comfort was much better cover.

Sheathing the deck of cards in whatever hidden area that it’d pulled them out of before, Angel approached the door, where the Pony behind it was knocking even faster than before. The noise had disturbed some of the other animals around the house, a pack of harvest mice in particular scattering into various holes in fear.

Hazama used the time it took for Angel to reach the door in order to sort out his appearance, making his hat more slanted on his head, making his tie less straight, and undoing a button or two on his shirt. While it disgruntled him to have to do these things, it was all necessary to keep up the disguise.

Angel was only a few steps away from the door when a muffled curse or two could be heard outside, followed by a strange shifting sound that immediately put Hazama on edge. It sounded far too similar to that shitty vampire’s teleportation for his liking. The knocking stopped after the noise occurred, making the rabbit hesitate, looking back to check that the Human was in position.

Nobody moved, and silenced pervaded the room. Should they open the door if it sounded like the person there was gone? Did they risk it? Hazama looked at Angel for a few moments, then nodded in the direction of the door meaningfully.

Getting a nod in return, the rabbit pulled down on the handle belonging to the lower half of the door that Fluttershy had installed to let Angel specifically in and out of the house whenever he pleased.

The door swung open from below, revealing a pair of bare Human legs, stepping forwards and backwards in place as though unsure of what to do.

From Hazama’s viewpoint, Angel was visibly bewildered, staring up at the Human outside the door. This wasn’t what either of them had expected. A visit from the Royal Guard, certainly, but not a lone Human. Obviously its owner had been outside the door a moment ago, but had left, presumably with the strange noise from before.

Its lower half ajar, the upper section of the door followed suit, swinging outwards to reveal the full form of the Human.

It was definitely a girl, as its naked state could attest. She had waist-length black hair which had obviously been cared for very well, and the same animalistic gaze as any other Human on this planet that Hazama had seen. She was decently tall, about a head below Hazama himself, which was a fair feat given how lanky he was.

Very carefully choosing to ignore the more obvious aspects of the female’s appearance, he groaned deeply, a sound that quickly turned into an aggravated growl.

This Human was the same one from before. The girl that Fluttershy had been chasing after when she found him.

There was a string tied around her ankle, with a slip of white paper dangling off of it. Angel was quick to pluck the note, easily snapping the string. The rabbit turned, hopping up to where Hazama sat in order to present him with the paper as the girl called Polly stood at the door, frowning somewhat.

Hazama took the slip from Angel’s grasp when it was presented to him, and scanned it for information.

[Miss. Polly here is a good Human, but due to matters outside of my control, I have had to give her up, and was hoping that you would be so very kind as to take her in. If I recall correctly, you have recently acquired a male of fine breed over the last week, so you have my full permission to have them breed if you so desire. As you’ve already taken care of her before, I assume you have everything you need to put up with her.]

…

Hazama finished reading, looking up to see that the girl had entered the room, and was sitting on the floor a meter or so from him, legs outstretched and hands on the floor for balance.

Then, seeing that she had his attention, she spread her legs wide open.

Hazama promptly stood up from his seat and made his way towards the stairs, suddenly deciding that Angel could take the beanbag if he cared so much about it.

Hard Sell shuddered as he walked into the darkened area, a room so large that he couldn't even make out the walls through the blackness.

As expected, a disembodied voice came from seemingly right behind him, but he did not turn around. Following instructions to the letter was the only way he was going to make a good impression.

"You are rid of the filth?" it asked, in a tone so quiet that it would have put anyone to sleep if not for the undertone of disgust that it carried.

The Noble merchant nodded once, shakily. Keeping his eyes forward and taking a deep breath, he spoke into the darkness.

"I am cleansed of the filth and muck, glorious one."

The voice from before seemed to laugh softly in amusement, and suddenly he could hear clapping. Slow, at first, but loud and very close by. Then another pair of hooves seemed to join in. And another, and another, until the entire black room was a chorus of wordless applause.

This was the moment he'd been waiting for. What he'd given up his Human for. He hoped it would be worth it.

A spotlight lit up the center of the room, almost blinding to look at, revealing a stone pedestal. Draped on top lay a set of folded robes, and a mask facing downwards. Hard Sell gulped, trembling with anticipation.

The voice again, directly whispering into his ear this time. He could feel the breath flow over his fur, and shivered involuntarily.

"Then welcome, Brother."

Author's Note

Some confusion came from the appearance of the egg in the real world last chapter. It will be explained later, but all i'll say for now is that it's not a usual part of his skillset.

And to clear up something some of you may have thought about the music section: No. It is not supposed to go with anything in the chapter. The purpose is just to share good music from a good game. Obviously both are subjective.

So now I have 'Susanooh', the theme of Haku-men. Who...Probably won't get mentioned ever again, except in passing perhaps.

Letting your Snake into the wild.

[Do we honestly have to keep her around?]

Fluttershy glanced at the same note that had been slipped under her nose again and again over the last couple of days. Hazama had taken to placing it on the wall and pointing to it whenever he felt like bugging her again.

Ever since Polly had been dropped off at the house three days ago, she had constantly been chasing after the intelligent Human for as many hours as she possibly good, intent on getting him to acknowledge her presence, so Fluttershy could understand his frustration. But at the same time, the Pegasus didn’t understand what he had against the girl. While Fluttershy never claimed to be an expert on Humans, let alone intelligent ones, she would have thought that Hazama could show some emotion towards the pining female other than deadpan negativity.

The yellow Pegasus had been shocked, returning home those days ago to find Hazama absent from the room and Angel collapsed on Harry the Bear’s beanbag laughing himself silly. The rabbit never found anything funny, so whatever had happened must have been truly hilarious.

That was when she had walked upstairs to find that Polly had somehow gotten inside the house and was sitting cross-legged outside the bathroom door, tapping on it every few seconds. Dropping her saddlebags at the landing of the stairs, Fluttershy had called out (as much as the Pegasus could do so) Hazama’s name, getting a response in the form of a larger knock from inside the bathroom.

Convincing Polly to move out of the way and head downstairs by means of a treat, she had spent a few minutes in a back-and-forth conversation where Hazama would slip responses underneath the crack in the door. Given that she’d seen the Human’s notepad left next to the beanbag, she was quick to notice that these notes were scribbled on her toilet paper.

When she had received the full story, Fluttershy had felt extraordinary pity for the girl, and had immediately decided to take her in, much to the evident dismay of Hazama, who had slipped several sheets of paper through the door, still connected, with the word [Whyyyyy? Just drop her off at the pound or whatever it is that you do with lost Humans here.] written out in full.

The Pony had been quick to reprimand the Human. The Ponyville Pound wasn’t a nice place for a Human to be. They could barely contain and take care of the smaller animals that sometimes appeared there, let alone a much more potentially dangerous Human. Not to mention the conditions there were exceedingly poor, but ironically the place never got extra funding because Fluttershy had always taken care of most of their animals. In essence, her house was the pound, and had been for many years.

Hazama had, at that point, swung open the door and, upon seeing that Polly was not in the general area, nodded with a slight frown on his lips. The explanation was understood, but he was still disappointed.

While the green haired Human spent some time straightening his clothing out again, she had wondered what could have led Hard Sell to give up Polly against his will. It couldn’t have been financial issues: the stallion was the second richest Pony in Ponyville, just below Filthy Rich. It also couldn’t have been a marital disagreement, as him and his wife considered Polly to be their pride and joy.

Whatever the reason, Fluttershy now had yet another more permanent addition to her household. She had stopped short at that thought, glancing over at Hazama with a blink of surprise. She was already thinking of the intelligent Human as somepony that would be living with her for a while. Why did she think that? For all she knew, he could be leaving in a few days, or want to go somewhere else.

Upon nervously breaching that subject a day later at the breakfast table, after successfully pulling Polly away from him, Hazama had looked at her in a contemplative manner, pausing just before he popped an egg into his mouth (a habit which Fluttershy hadn’t questioned, but still found extraordinarily odd).

She had asked him how long he wanted to stay, and he’d said that he had nowhere else to go, and that was it. Just like that, Fluttershy had two Humans living with her for the foreseeable future.

Fast forward to today, and the Pegasus looked down from the note on the wall, quietly smiling to herself as she remembered the many variable faces of disgust and discomfort that Hazama had made whenever Polly attempted a pass at him. Those kind of situations usually caused him to point indignantly towards the message.

Her answer had not once changed, however, and now she was preparing a few bits and pieces in the kitchen for the impromptu trip into Ponyville that Hazama had suggested as a means of getting away from the incredibly clingy girl.

Fluttershy could understand the reasoning behind it. The Guards had yet to pay them a visit, and their presence around town had decreased significantly over the last couple of days, although Shining Armour was still taking residence in Twilight’s castle while he prepared to head back to the Crystal Empire the moment that Cadence sent the word. It would be good for Hazama to stretch his legs, as sitting around the house playing cards all day wasn’t very good for one’s body, even if he hadn’t been able to sit down and play as of recent with the constant presence of Polly.

Hazama, meanwhile, was greatly looking forward to leaving the house, if only for a day. While it was true that he didn’t care overly much for the irritating girl following him around like a lost dog, he also found her reaction to his refusals to be a source of great amusement. The reason he’d given Fluttershy for wanting to go into town was a combination of Polly’s irritations and wanting a better look at the town than he’d gotten previously, which was true to an extent but not entirely.

He was curious about magic. Namely, the way it worked and just how different it was to Ars Magus. In the house, he had no way of studying it outside of the latent magic element running through the air, but he needed to see it in action, properly being cast by a Unicorn and preferably not against him. That way, he would be able to observe the way that the creatures harnessed the power and hopefully be able to replicate the feat with a bastardised version of his Ars Magus aptitude.

Then he could see what to do about the seal around his voice.

For now, though, he was preparing to leave. And by that, he meant that he was tapping a foot impatiently beside the door, watching the Pegasus scramble around the kitchen. What was she even trying to do? They weren’t intending to have a picnic, after all.

Eventually, the horse found what she was looking for and trotted over, gesturing for him to follow as she held a bag in her mouth.

While it wasn't quite as sunny as the first day he'd arrived, the temperature was just perfect for what Hazama was used to. It felt just like the slightly humid areas of Orient Town in Kagutsuchi, one of the better places to find something to eat if he did say so himself.

He had grown used to getting strange looks by the first five minutes of being in town, but it still amused him to catch whispers of his odd looks from the horses that thought they were being quiet. And yes, he was still going to call them horses. Calling them Ponies was just a step too far in the girly direction, even if the yellow one sent him a disparaging glance every time he called them horses.

Hazama paid little attention to the Pegasus as he walked, enjoying being out and about for the time being. Horses of all varieties went about their business around him: market stalls were set up, shop windows flipped their signs to open, and overall the town seemed to be just getting into the swing of the day. He had no idea how the mornings usually looked in this place, but it seemed like an average day by most standards.

He paused in the middle of a step as he felt something tug at his trousers, and looked down.

"I need to visit the pet store for some more birdseed. D-Do you think you can wait outside? I promise I won't take too long..." Fluttershy whispered, drawing a slightly confused glance from a passing mare, who seemed to quickly shrug it off and keep walking. Hazama had learned recently that the yellow horse could talk to animals, and as much as that seemed ridiculous, there was really no other explanation for why she was so comfortable trusting all those creatures around her house.

The green-haired Human grunted slightly, and tried to convey his question the best he could by moving an arm in the general direction of the store simply labeled 'Pets!' and then back to himself.

She seemed to get it, shaking her head sheepishly. "N-No, i'm afraid they don't let Humans inside... But they have a post to tie..." Fluttershy trailed off, flushing somewhat as she realised what she was suggesting. "You won't want that, will you?"

Hazama simply shook his head in response, sticking his hands in his pocket and moving to stand a few meters away from the door as the Pegasus walked past, shooting him an apologetic look as the double doors swung shut behind her, leaving the Human hovering awkwardly with nothing to do.

Seriously, what kind of pet store didn't allow pets inside? That was just ridiculous! It would be like a hospital that only let healthy people get treated. It was unjust! It was stupid! It was absolutely dumb that Hazama was actually thinking of defending his rights as a pet.

Abandoning that train of thought, he allowed himself to look around, for lack of any other options.

And found himself staring straight into the face of a naked male across the path. He seemed to be tied up to a pole similar in appearance to the one next to Hazama, linked by an oddly thick metal chain instead of rope. He was squatting low to the ground, looked shorter than an average Human, and was staring straight at his intelligent counterpart.

Hazama cocked an eyebrow in its direction, seeing that he had the dumber creature's direct attention for some reason. He didn't have food on him, and nor did he have anything that might be of interest to an animal. So why him? There were horses milling around all over the place, and one stallion even walked straight past his line of sight, but still the stare of the male was locked upon him.

He took a moment to study the body of the unintelligent being, running through a mental checklist of comparisons to his own species. Its head was definitely flatter, less round than expected; it had a dirty brown colouration of hair, and its eyes had the same lifeless daze to them as Polly did. So why was it so intent on staring at him?!

That's when it began to growl. Quietly at first, gnashing its filthy yellow teeth in his direction, making the surrounding horses visibly uneasy. When it started to sound comparable to a chainsaw in nature, however, the disruption became so great as to halt most of the area as they watched the Human on the bench get threatened by the Human squatting on the dirt.

"What's that Human getting so worked up about?"

"I don't know, but isn't that other Human the same one that Princess Twilight tied up a couple of weeks ago?"

"You sure about that?"

"Yeah, it definitely is. I recognise the stupid green hair."

At the last murmur, Hazama felt the overwhelming urge to go and punt the offender into the ground, but he restrained himself and kept his eyes on the growling Human. An animal would stay locked onto the potential threat, not caring about muttered whispers from the sidelines, after all! That, and he wouldn't be able to tell who had been speaking, so it was best to not care.

He kept a watchful, steady gaze upon the feral Human as it started barking, almost shouting in inexplicable anger at something or another. It tried to stand, yanking against the metal chain linking it to the post. Every one of the nearby horses took a fearful step back at the unreasonable levels of rage displayed by the Human.

A flicker of movement to the left caught Hazama's eye. There, at the end of the road. Two horses wearing a set of old-fashioned golden-steel armour, muttering wordlessly to one another and pointing in his direction.

'The Royal Guard.' He thought dispassionately, tuning out the screeching from the right and focusing discreet attention on the way the Guard were acting. They definitely had some interest in him, but was it because of the Human screaming at him, or some other reason? From the very edge of his perception, he was able to catch a mumbled word or two, out of context.

"Him...Sure?"

"Titan...Barking... Sure."

"Get... Armour... Take him in."

And then they nodded to each other, and several things fell into place for Hazama.

The chain in place of a rope. The intense focus. The endless feral barking after a moment. This wasn't some random Human acting out on a whim. This was a guard dog! Something placed to recognise a specific target, like a bloodhound. They wanted him. Of course they hadn't forgotten his suspicious presence in the infected Human incident! How foolish of him to think so!

Hazama twitched imperceptibly, his eyes flickering around the crowd and, with an internal groan of annoyance, spotting another armoured horse in the other direction. He was surrounded, and that didn't bode well at all. It wasn't that he couldn't take them out, he was sure of his capabilities in that respect, but that in doing so he would obviously reveal his nature.

But there didn't seem to be any other way out. He could run, of course, but then why would he have a reason to in the eyes of the crowd? He could bolt inside the store to 'look for his owner', but then if that fell through he'd be cornered even more. Damn, he wished there was a convenient butterfly to chase after.

They were getting closer, now. Having spent a moment sending some kind of signal to each other, the three Guards that Hazama could see were starting to close in. That wasn't even counting the ones he couldn't see without being suspicious about it.

'They're sure putting a lot of effort into catching a dumb animal.' Hazama thought grimly, pretty annoyed that the horses were this persistent about it. Why were these dumb horses more efficient at their jobs than most of the Intelligence Branch!?

There wasn't anywhere to go or anything to do, not without outright revealing himself to the world. The horses were within seventy meters of him now, and he could see one of the Unicorns in the group lighting up their horn.

His foot shifted against the dirt, kicking up a small amount of dust as he weighed his options. If he got captured, what would they find out? One couldn't arrest an animal, after all. Did they actually suspect that he was intelligent in some way?

Fifty meters. Fourty five. Fourty.

'Damn it, what the fuck do I do?'

Thirty. Twenty five. He could see their faces clearly, and the crowd had started to part for them, muttering concerns about the presence of Guards all the while. The feral Human had stopped its shrieking, but now settled for growling intimidatingly in the green-haired Human's direction.

Hazama sucked in a breath, squinting his golden eyes and trying not to mess with his hat too overtly. It was the moment of truth. Fight or flight.

Twenty. Eighteen. Fifteen.

The Unicorn with the lit-up horn started walking faster, and the hairs on the back of Hazama's neck stood on end. Magic. A magical force was trying to influence his body in some way, or was starting to. He had to choose quickly.

Around him, the crowd seemed to be drawing closer, a sea of concerned faces looking around at the scene. Hazama got an idea. An utterly ridiculous idea, and one that would kick his pride forever, but it was better than nothing.

He started to growl. Standing up off of the bench, he raised himself to his full height. He made his head shoot around to look at the crowd, focusing on each area for a second or two before moving on. In his searching, he took note of the Guards hesitating, which was exactly what he wanted.

Hazama moved shuffled a foot to the right side of the path, where the crowd was strongest but the presence of the Guard seemed to be lesser. In the midst of the horde, there was still a slight gap made to accommodate the horse that needed to get through, and that was his ticket.

Ignoring the increasingly agitated response that the other Human was giving across the road, and the wary eyes of the Guards who seemed to have an inkling about what was going on, the intelligent Human took one last look around the ever encroaching group of horses, taking note of where the biggest potential threats appeared to be as he acted out being scared of the massive gathering.

And then he took off, turning to the left and sprinting as fast as he could go towards the partial gap in the crowd, which at his level of strength and speed was very, very quick.

Action exploded from all sides. The civilian horses shrieked in fear of the suddenly agitated Human, scrambling out of the way and inadvertently making Hazama's job much easier, while the few Guards dotted around began to gallop towards him. Luckily, the ones in the direction that Hazama was sprinting had already been passed before they realised what was happening.

He could hear panicked shouts from almost every horse he passed, and he made sure to make his arms flail in the air as he went, for as embarrassing as it was, it wouldn't do to make it seem as though he had method to his madness.

He passed into the busy marketplace within seconds, coming out from one opening and startling a great many horses on his way through the center, intent on making it to one of the alleys that led to the other side of town, as far as Hazama could tell, at least.

"Aaah! A loose Human!"

"Get out of its way and it won't hurt you!"

And then, "Stout Shield, Rolling Stone! After the Human"

A particularly commanding shout from the left, and suddenly more of the Guards emerged from pathways and buildings. From what he could gather while sprinting, there were approximately eight, nine, or ten of them chasing after him now, and the path he had intended on traversing was now blocked off, leaving only the large dirt track to the right, leading out of the town.

'Well, in for a penny, I suppose...!' Hazama thought, skidding on the dirt as he dug his foot down, causing him to almost drift in the correct direction until he was back in a straight line, continuing to run with the lower half of the back of his suit flapping in the wind. At this point, it didn't matter if his actions seemed a little suspicious. He was out of the view of most of the crowd, and he was going much too fast for any of them to keep up with. In fact, he was mildly surprised that the horses were keeping up as well as they were, given the speed at which he ran.

But they were starting to trail behind, further and further as he sprinted out of town, and into a plain of rolling hills with the dusty track running over them. The colourful buildings grew smaller with distance, and so did the Guards that were after him.

That didn't stop Hazama from continuing to flee, not even remotely winded as the hills were soon replaced with a large area of flat land, rows upon rows of trees now filling his surroundings. Perfect.

After another few minutes of running, his pace slowed until he came to a complete stop. He moved his head around, but could neither see nor hear any sign of his attackers. Upon noticing nothing of the sort, Hazama allowed himself to let out a deep, winded sigh.

Running had never been his strongest suit. He liked to take even the most dangerous of threats casually, hopping back and forth to irritate his opponents. Luckily, he was still more than fast enough thanks to experience and raw power.

"You again? Ah thought Fluttershy was keepin' hold a' y'all..."

Hazama groaned, turning warily to face the orange horse that had tied him up a week and a half previously. She didn't appear to be angry, but seemed more bemused than anything, her hoof holding her stetson higher on her head as though she didn't quite appear to believe what she was seeing. Nor could Hazama, really. This entire, massive orchard, and he happened to end up next to one of the same horses that had been against him before?

It was better than the guards, at any rate.

Author's Note

Hey so I was a bit of an idiot and didn't hit Publish on this chapter yesterday before I went to bed, so I uploaded it today instead. There probably won't be another chapter until tomorrow, so the schedule should right itself then.

Now I know I never promised daily uploads of chapters, but I did fall into that rhythm so I basically stuck with it.

So my thought is this. My weekday uploads will be as close to daily as I can manage, but I will only upload once on the weekend.

This may be subject to change once the plot gets a little heavier and more action needs to fit inside one chapter, but we'll see how that goes.

Music segment time, cue the trumpets or whatever.

This is 'Silent Scream', the theme of Yuuki Terumi. An edgy track name for an edgy character. Also it's a youtube extended version for some reason, I don't know.

Oh Serpent, where art thou?

“Gosh. Quite a ruckus going on out there, huh? Somethin’ going on today that I didn’t know about, Fluttershy?” The elderly store clerk hummed, counting out the necessary change for the big bag of mixed birdseed. Bit after bit stacked on top of each other at a speed that most would consider too slow.

The Pegasus shook her head warily as the distinctly angry-sounding shrieks continued to grow in volume. There was nothing planned in Ponyville as far as she was aware, but that didn’t count for too much as she was usually the last to know regardless. It sounded as though somepony had greatly agitated a Human something fierce, as she’d never heard one sound quite as hair-raising as the one outside.

She was concerned, briefly, as she thought about Hazama being outside with the angry Human, but quelled her own worry quickly enough. Hazama was smart, and would obviously know his own species enough to avoid agitating a member of it. Most likely, he was sitting on the bench she’d left him on wearing the same slightly bewildered expression he always had on his face.

Bits continued to clink quietly, the conversation dying out as the shouting finally started to die down. When it did, however, Fluttershy could start to hear other noises. The sound of a murmuring crowd, muffled but still present. The Human must have drawn a lot of attention, if the noise level was as high as it was.

And then another, much more worrying cry rang out.

“Detain the Human, quickly!”

The voice was far more authoritative than any scared Pony would be, too ‘in command’. It must have been the Royal Guard, alerted to the presence of the enraged Human from earlier. They must have gone to capture it before it hurt anyone, if the Human was as aggressive as he sounded.

Fluttershy turned back to face the clerk as he let out a croaky chuckle, shaking his head slightly as he placed the last couple of coins on top of the pile, sliding them over to her.

“Guess those watchhumans were useful for somethin’ after all.” He grinned, to Fluttershy’s confusion.

“W-Watchhumans? What are they?”

The clerk inclined his head to the side, giving the mare an inquisitive look.

“I guess you wouldn’t know about ‘em, what with how little you’re in town.” He shrugged, leaning back in his seat to examine the empty store, “But they’re these big ol’ Humans, specially bred for the Royal Guard. They aren’t good for fightin’, but they make one heck of an uproar if they see somethin’ suspicious. They’ve been put all over town ”

Fluttershy stopped short, just before putting the birdseed into a saddlebag. Watchhumans? Specially bred for the Royal Guard? She’d never heard of anything like that before. If the big commotion from a minute ago was any indication, they really could make a lot of noise.

It was actually kind of ingenious. Humans weren’t intelligent at all, aside from the obvious example, but they had fairly good pattern recognition. If you gave one some food in a certain spot, the very next day at around the same time they would return to that spot in search for food. She supposed a similar example could be applied to other things as well, such as teaching a Human to scream or attack if they saw somepony trying to pickpocket somepony else.

But why did the Royal Guard have these watchhumans dotted around Ponyville? The crime rate was closer to zero than almost any other area in the world, and the only moderately dangerous event of recent times was the potential infected Human outbreak, but that had been quelled without much issue at all, and even Hazama had apparently been able to deal with them on his own.

Wait.

Wait.

The gears turning in the Pegasi’s mind could almost be seen from the outside, as the clerk leaned over the counter in a concerned manner, growing slightly confused as the mare’s lower jaw dropped downwards.

Fluttershy was out of the store at a speed that would make Rainbow Dash feel threatened.

Hazama! The Guards were still looking for Hazama! That’s what all the watchhumans were searching for! It would be so easy to train a human to consider clothes on a Human or even green hair to be something to shout at. The intelligent Human was practically the easiest target to recognise in Equestria, save for one of the Princesses perhaps. With his expensive clothes and distinct features, it wouldn’t be hard to track his movements at all with all the eyewitnesses that he would garner.

The call of ‘Detain the Human’ obviously was not a friendly one.

Outside, a large group of Ponies was milling about, chattering loudly and discussing something that had evidently only just happened. Fluttershy looked around, and was quick to spot the trio of flower vendors fanning their faces with their hooves dramatically. She wasn’t sure if they were pretending to almost faint, or if they really were that sensitive to excitement, but she approached them nevertheless.

Upon spotting her trotting towards them, the mares immediately appeared to sober up, waving cheerily at the Pegasus as though nothing at all had just happened.

“Hey Fluttershy!” The trio spoke in unison, each waving a forehoof in her direction as grins split their faces. And then the floodgates opened.

“Did’ja see what happened?”

“We were there! Right next to it!”

“It was horrifying!”

“So scary…”

“We could have died of fright!”

“Everypony was screaming!”

“Yeah…”

Fluttershy blinked as she processed the sea of words that she’d just been swamped with.

“U-Uhm. No, I was just in the pet store when ‘it’ happened.” She spoke tentatively, “What… What was ‘it’?

Bad question. The trio shared a conspiratorial glance, nodding at one another as Roseluck drew in a breath so deep that Pinkie Pie, hard at work, paused to wince.

“Well we were just walking up to the market to set up shop when we saw this weird Human with clothes sitting on a bench and we thought ‘well that’s a bit weird’ and then,”

The next mare took over, “And then the watchhuman started growling and screaming. It was really strange, but the Human on the bench looked more weirded out than anyone. I didn’t even know Humans could have facial expressions like that! But then,”

And the final Earth Pony rounded it off with: “So then we saw the Royal Guard coming closer to the Humans, which was pretty handy because it was getting a little frightening with how loud the watchhuman was. We heard them talking about Shining Armour wanting them to take the weird Human in, which was also a bit odd considering that it seemed really docile and confused, so they obviously weren’t looking to kill it. But then when everypony started getting closer to watch the action, the Human started to get frightened, standing up and growling at all of us. It wasn’t his fault, really. It must have been really claustrophobic in the middle of all that. And then…”

Fluttershy braced herself for the bad news. Everything said thus far was merely confirming her suspicions, but it was better than she feared at least. Her darker thoughts had jumped immediately to some less-than-savoury things.

“And then he ran off!” The three mares spoke as one again, “He just bolted right through the crowd, faster than any Human we’ve ever seen in our lives! Captain Shining Armour’s deputy had the most hilarious look on his face, like someone just swiped some candy from his hooves. Then the Guards all ran after it. They’ve probably caught it by now with how many Guards they’ve had around town.”

With the whole story out, The yellow Pegasus took a step back, sighing in a mixture of relief and surprising irritation. She knew from experience that Hazama was very fast, especially after both encounters with Rainbow Dash, so he was pretty likely to escape from them. The issue came from the fact that he would likely never be able to get into town again, and the Royal Guard would probably redouble their efforts to catch him now that they too had seen one of the many strange quirks held by the intelligent Human.

“W-Wow. That sounds like…Quite a story, girls. I need to go home, I think…” Fluttershy spoke, giving the trio a weak smile that they returned with another hearty wave as she walked off, having no idea where Hazama had run off to, and no way of finding him. It was better to just return home and wait for a sign of him there.

She heard whispers from behind her.

“Wait, wasn’t that Human hers?”

“Oh, wait, you’re right! She had him at the castle when the infected Humans attacked…”

“Wonder why the Guards want him…?”

Fluttershy kept walking, ignoring the several attempts to draw her attention from nearby Ponies.

Hazama watched the orange horse warily as she looked him up and down in the same manner, a forehoof under her muzzle in thought. And he could tell she was thinking hard because she was humming, which bugged him more than it should.

‘Seriously, it’s like these idiots show exactly what they’re doing at all times. Everything’s so unbearably literal here!’ He grumbled internally, resisting the urge to hold onto his hat and put a hand in his pocket, making the accurate assumption that giving her more reason to examine him was probably a bad idea.

He saw the mare cock her head to one side, and did the same with a deadpan, confused expression on his face, drawing a slight chuckle from the horse.

“Well, ah can’t rightly just let y’all go walkin’ around, ‘specially not with Twi’s big brother on th’ lookout for ya…” she pondered to herself.

Hazama felt like raising an eyebrow. ‘So this mare knows I’m suspected of something, but still feels fit to keep me around? If I was told that a potentially violent animal was wanted by the NOL, I wouldn’t want to keep it around.’

It was a bit strange. The mare didn’t seem even remotely shocked at his sudden appearance, and the look she was giving him did not fill him with confidence. As much as he didn’t care for the opinions of others, this was starting to get a little uncomfortable.

She took a step closer with a mindful eye, gauging his reaction to her approach. When he didn’t show any signs of aggression, she took another, coming to stand directly in front of him as he stared down at her. She stared back up unflinchingly, and he was almost impressed. She gave a semi-appreciative hum.

“Ya seem pretty fine to me. Dunno why th’ Guard have it out for ya. Is Fluttershy around? I gotta talk ta her.”

Hazama blinked.

Applejack blinked, and then shook her head with a snort.

“What am ah doin’, chattin’ to a Human?”

He felt the desire to point out that she was continuing to do so, but restrained himself. The mare was a friend of Fluttershy from what he could gather, so this was a good of a place to hide out as any. He could only hope that this one wouldn’t get hostile about his presence.

The mare drew his attention back to her with a strange whistle, short and sharp. When she saw he was looking at her, she did it again, taking a few steps away from him while looking back over her side.

Was she…Trying to get him to move by whistling? He felt somewhat miffed by the assumption that someone would get him to move by something as pathetic as a whistle. What was he, cattle? A cow to be herded into a pen? Absolutely not.

“C’mon, git! Ah got a special treat for y’all if’n ya come along~!” The mare trilled with a sing-song lilt, waving her hoof forward to usher him forward.

‘Moo.’ Hazama joked to himself as he stepped forward, drawing a satisfied grin from the horse as she began to canter forward, along the columns of trees bearing more of those apples that he’d seen before.

It wasn’t that the idea of the treat is what got him to follow along, but it was the fact that the mare was obviously leading him away from the open orchard, which was fine by him. The less chance he had to be seen by the Guard, the better. He didn’t doubt that they were still following him, and they can’t have been that far behind at this point.

The duo sauntered along the treeline steadily, not too fast or overly slow. Every now and then, the mare would give him a once-over in a considering manner, each time nodding and grunting to herself as though confirming something in her mind. Hazama didn’t care overly much for whatever the mare thought of him, but he found himself slightly curious as to how horses judged a Human’s appearance nonetheless.

He heard something grunt from a small distance away, and then a heavy smack of something connecting against wood. A few smaller noises afterwards, several objects thumping against the ground.

When Hazama looked over, he started to see why the orange horse had not been intimidated by him in the least.

The Human he was looking at stood a head and a half taller than himself, and had definitely been bred and built for power. With skin shaded a bronze-like tan, the male’s body was obscenely wide, and all of it was pure muscle, bulging outwards from every limb. Hazama even swore that he could see muscles on top of muscles, but he couldn’t be sure.

However, as impressive as most others would find the specimen, he knew better. This type of muscle was hard to compensate for, and made moving cumbersome and striking much more difficult. It made one look big and strong, but wasn’t actually helpful in the long run. A better example of stupidly high power would be Azrael, but Hazama didn’t much feel like giving the Mad Dog any credit for anything. Whether he won the fight or not, he could still sometimes feel a phantom ache in his arm after taking a hit there. Considering that Hazama’s sense of pain was dulled dramatically, this was saying something.

He paused upon sighting such a monstrosity, standing in place to watch it at work. It slammed a fist against a tree, shaking it to its roots. The mare at his side apparently didn’t mind this, and simply nodded in approval as a large quantity of apples fell from the branches above, landing in the wide baskets set on the ground.

“C’mon, no need t’ feel jealous of ol’ Magnus here. He’s a special ‘un.” The farm horse chuckled, tugging at his suit sleeve to urge him forward again, to which Hazama agreed with by starting to walk again.

The green haired Human smiled to himself when he got the chance after the mare did one of her impromptu check-ups again, shaking his head. Jealous of a wild Human with some muscle on his bones? Not likely.

The pair approached a barn at the end of the path. It was quite an impressive structure for how rustic it looked. The wooden beams were tall and very wide, obviously built to last. Inevitably, it was that same red-and-white colour scheme that everyone knew a barn to be, even if Hazama had never seen one personally before. Barns were yet another relic from a time long gone. It was almost whimsical, but he was never much one for whimsy.

Coming to a stop, the mare turned to face him as she held a hoof out, bringing Hazama to a halt. A wide smile painted her expression when this happened, and he realised with an internal sigh that he appeared to be very well trained now that she knew he would stop and start upon command.

She drew closer, coming within a few inches of him and started to circle around, looking him up and down from all sides. Nothing unusual about that, he supposed. Anyone would be interested in a pet with a full set of clothes.

Then he felt her prod the back of his leg, and he buckled his knee forward in response after she applied a bit more pressure.

“Lets Ponies touch ‘im without complainin’, even from where he can’t see…” She muttered to herself, as though adding to a mental checklist, and only then did Hazama understand what she was doing. All this time, she’d been making some sort of official diagnosis of his ability to be a good pet. He would have let out a sigh of relief: this test would be absolutely simple to pass.

She shook his arm a little bit, judging his lack of reaction. When she went to shake it back and forth much harder, only then did he pull it from her grasp with a slight frown. He did this to make himself seem more realistic, rather than some perfect Human, which seemed to work as the mare nodded lightly.

“Pretty darn docile… That’s a good sign.”

She rolled up his sleeve, surprisingly delicate with it for one who sounded like they wouldn’t know a suit from a trench-coat. Whatever she saw on his arms, she approved of it, as he could tell from the pleased hum. He knew he wasn’t overtly muscled, but as many of his enemies would attest, he was a lot stronger than one would expect upon closer inspection.

“Whew! That’s a fine bit of muscle there. Fluttershy’s pretty darn lucky t’ own a Human like you!” the orange horse grinned,

The mare finally pulled away and circled around to his front again, staring up at him with a certain glint in her eye.

“Yup. Y’all are perfect for the job!” She spoke proudly, puffing out her chest in approval and tilting her hat towards him for the same reason. Hazama wasn’t so sure.

‘Job? What job could she possibly mean? Hitting those trees for apples like that other brute?’ He thought, ‘I’d rather not, if it’s all the same.’

Because as much as he would probably get more work done in a day than the horses could get done in a week, there were better uses of his time, abilities, and effort.

Thankfully, the tree-hitting work was not to be his job. Or so it seemed, as the horse beckoned him towards the barn. He stepped forward quickly enough, the ghost of a smirk appearing on the mare’s face as her earlier hypothesis about his obedience was apparently proven correct.

When he was standing directly in front of the heavy double doors, the mare pulled one open a crack and rather unceremoniously dragged him into the weirdly darkened room.

“Y’all have some fun in there, mmkay? Ah got high hopes for ya! We got a lot to make up for after that darn infection hit us hard.” The horse said with a wink and an accompanying laugh, swinging the door shut behind him.

The first thing he noticed was the smell. It was heavy and pungent, but he couldn’t place it for the life of him, it was like nothing he’d smelled before.

He squinted in the gloom, noticing the small windows in the upper half of the barn that sent beams of sunlight into the room. His eyes were slowly getting used to the change in light level, just as he heard something shift in what sounded like hay nearby. It was then that he noticed that only the middle segment of the barn was mostly blacked out, and lining the sides of the room were several columns of paddocks, with their gates wide open.

Hazama took an uneasy step forward, and the shuffling noise could be heard again. Something was stirring, as though groggy and waking up from a deep sleep. Actually, a lot of somethings, all along the room.

He heard something heavy thunk into place behind him, and he whipped around. Through the tiny crack in the middle of the double doors, he could see a very large portion in the middle that blocked any light from coming through. He pushed at the door experimentally, and it didn’t budge. He was locked in. Another push, and still nothing. Whatever the horse had put into place was pretty heavy. It wouldn’t be too hard to break out if he actually wanted to, but he supposed that he should see what the horse actually wanted from him.

Footsteps from behind. Soft, muffled, barefoot. Several sets, then a lot more. Hazama took a moment to think about the way the mare had spoken about him, and the way she’d been judging him, and especially what she’d said to him just before he got put inside here.

Groaning out loud, he turned around, and was met with exactly the sight that he feared.

An entire crowd of Human females, all gazing at him with a hunger that was not the stomach-kind, and all absolutely stark naked. Against his better judgement, he spent a good second or two just admiring the group’s assets of varying sizes. Small ones were the norm, but there were a good number or larger attractions to be spotted around, which Hazama particularly found he approved of.

As if to make the sight into even more ridiculous wish-fulfilment for most men, a large portion of the group turned around and bent low to the ground, pointing their many sexes in his direction needily, some obviously dripping with excitement. That explained the scent, at least.

They were in heat. Of course they were. Of Course they fucking were. They were more like animals than he thought, and that didn’t make him entirely comfortable with being where he was. Hell, he wasn’t 100% on this from the get-go.

‘Sorry ladies, but I’m going to have to decline your, ah… Very generous offers. I don’t even think I could provide you with what you’re obviously looking for, and what your owner wants me to give you. So I’ll just be on my merry way, and… Are those voices I hear outside?’

And sure enough, upon listening in just a little bit harder, he could hear conversation drifting through the door, or the closing lines of one at any rate.

“Thank y’all for yer concern, Mister Armour, but I ain’t seen hide nor hair of no green-haired Human ‘round here.”

“That’s quite alright, Applejack. It is my job after all. In fact, you have females in that barn, do you not?”

“’Matter of fact I do. Just finished checkin’ there myself, so the varmint y’all’re after ain’t there neither.”

‘Oh, you clever little bitch. This had better not go where I think it’s going to go.’ Hazama groaned, hearing the various women beside him start to call out quietly, making noises that sounded uncomfortably like moaning for his taste. Surprisingly, though most would have called it immoral, he found himself growing interested in more ways than one.

Years upon years of absolutely no sexual contact, even his own due to lack of time, had made him increasingly pent up, though he’d never speak those words out loud ever. It wasn’t like he cared about it being immoral either: if he was worried about morals then his life was the wrong one to lead, and that was putting it nicely.

“Yes, and that’s good, but I think it would be best if we kept watch over the farm, and this barn particularly, for the time being. The Human is lost, and this is a large concentration of females in their heat season, if what you say is true. He wouldn’t possibly be able to resist that level of pheromones, so he’ll likely come by this way. That’s when my squad and I can catch him.” The voice that Hazama vaguely recognised as Shining Armour’s spoke out, to which the farm mare vocally approved of. If he didn’t know better, he’d say there were undertones to her speech that were smug as hell. He almost felt proud that another being could reach that level of hidden smarm, especially to a Captain’s face.

But he was also somewhat pleased with the Captain’s words himself.

‘And it looks like I don’t have any other option to pass the time. Sounds like I’ll be hiding here for a good while, after all~’ He grinned widely in a snake-like manner, removing his hat from his head and causing it to vanish into nothingness, ready to be summoned back if he so willed it.

Kicking aside his morals, he turned to face the eager group of females with a spring in his step.

‘Aaaalrighty then! Which of you to go for first, I wonder…?’

Author's Note

Ok. Ok. Ok. First things first: The chapter's ending.

In every YHAY fic I've read, the protagonist is always disgusted at the thought of doing anything with other Humans. However, I would argue that Hazama really doesn't care much at all, and if he enjoys something then he honestly doesn't give a shit how he goes about it or the possible ramifications. It is reasonably in character that, circumstances being what they are, he would be pretty OK with the whole deal.

And honestly so should some of the other Humans that end up in this version of Equestria. Funny how all of them are patron saints of right and wrong, and never show any lapse in judgement unless it drives the plot forward, hm?

Important Audience Question: SOLVED. It is not being written out. For those new readers who don't know what I mean, ignore this message.

Music time! And here's 'Awakening the Chaos', which could be considered a metaphor for what I did this chapter. Oh well!

Revealing its Fangs.

Hazama was pacing. Back and forth, forward and back, all along the width of the barn. Over and over again. At regular intervals, angered snarls would tear themselves from his throat, and he would decide to kick a hole in another one of the paddocks.

Nothing! All that he had done, and nothing! No feeling, nothing! The excitement he’d thought that he’d felt for that one instant in time was just a candle-flame, snuffed out in an instant the moment he realised that it was all fake.

His head snapped around to glance thunderously towards the women, cowering in the corner as they stared at him. Good. They should be scared of him. That’s what he wanted. His hand strayed to the hat that had reappeared on his head as he tried in vain to calm himself down.

But he wouldn’t be calm. Not now.

He had foolishly thought that perhaps going through the Boundary, entering a new world, all of that would have fixed his body, but instead it only exacerbated the problem. The gaping hole in his left shoulder blade had grown wider. Larger. Splintering cracks running around the edges like spider-webs. A window into what he really was.

Nothing. Empty. A body formed of Magic Element to serve as nothing more than a vessel for somebody else. He wasn’t a person, he was a doll. A puppet. All the times he’d laughed in the Vermillion girl’s face for her circumstances, and he was no. Fucking! Better!

The noise that wrenched itself from his mouth was not quite a scream, and not quite a shout. His hand shot forward, and the familiar green-black chain flew forward, tearing straight through a thick wooden column like it were wet tissue. At the noise of the impact and the horrifying sound, the other Humans in the barn had whimpered in fear, recognising how much danger they were now in. Some had scurried back to their cells, or paddocks or whatever.

Hazama didn’t care, and it wouldn’t help them if he actually decided to take his frustration out on them. Fortunately, he was much too preoccupied cursing the universe over and over again for the mere fact that he was forced to exist.

‘Rags thinks he’s got it bad? Oh, boo-hoo, your brother cut your arm off, killed your sister, then burned your shitty house and shittier guardian down. What a fucking shame! But you know what, Raggy boy? I fucking envy you. I wish I had your goddamn life. For one. Single. Reason.’ He fumed, now taking to flipping a knife from his pocket and trailing it along the wall of the barn, leaving deep slash marks as he walked, ‘YOU’RE the one who gets to kill Terumi. Not me! You get to avenge your ‘suffering’ and all the people you care about or whatever. I don’t get shit! I get to jump into the goddamn Boundary, and end up in a world run by fucking horses!’ Hazama finished with another feral shriek, which only served to feed his irritation in a loop. Why could he scream, rave, and shout, but not fucking talk!?

In his unyielding frustration, he finished off the still-standing column with a kick, sending it flying through the air until it crashed into the back set of doors, breaking a splintered hole straight through them.

Hazama knew he’d made a misstep when he heard shouting from outside, and the sound of armour clanking slightly as the being wearing it sprinted towards trouble.

The Guards. The fucking Guards. How stupid. How stupid did they have to be!? Why couldn’t he just be left alone? They wanted to chase him, hound him down until he submitted? Good luck with that. He refused to submit. He would never submit to anyone ever again. Not to Terumi, not to Izanami, and definitely not these stupid, childlike, arrogant little shitstains that thought they could even remotely stand up to him!

Well, if he had anything to say about it, and he did have a whole lot to say about it, then they would learn to leave him the fuck alone. What he had planned was a bad idea, anyone in their right mind could have told him that. It would ruin his chances for a relatively peaceful new life. It would end badly if he had underestimated the horses this whole time. It would do a lot of things.

But even knowing all of these things, Hazama gripped his knife tighter in his hand, facing the barricaded front door with a murderous expression on his face. Right now, he was absolutely pissed beyond belief.

If they wanted a violent Human, then they were going to fucking get one.

Shining Armour held up a hoof to his lieutenant.

The Guards that had been closing the circle tighter around the barn halted as the order was passed around the circle, all glancing towards their Captain for answers.

He didn’t have any, but something about the situation felt distinctly off about the entire situation.

A minute prior, a noise had come from the structure. A noise that even those specialised in training the watchhumans couldn’t stand to listen to, and those Humans were stupidly loud. It was a horrifying thing to hear, the screech of a creature that angry. It was the Human they were after, no doubt about it, but Shining Armour was still hesitant to approach. Because the noise stopped.

Usually, when a Human was enraged, they made noise constantly, snarling and shrieking and growling until they calmed down. But ever since that first cry of anger, the barn had been menacingly silent. That is, until one of his Guards reported that a very large hunk of wood had been sent shooting out of the back doors into the nearby woods.

He had ordered them to hold position, and signal him if the Human tried to escape through that route. It hadn’t been needed. The barn was silent again.

The Guards were starting to get antsy, though they tried to hide it from him. He understood their impatience, however. He would have to apologise profusely to his sister and the mayor for the fairly large-scale disruption later, but it would be a great benefit to have the dangerous creature finally under wraps.

It was the investigation into the infected Humans that had gotten them the information they needed. The two creatures had obviously shambled into town, but Twilight had obviously been more than prepared thanks to her friend Applejack already being present, and the citizens were all in complete shelter sans several Pegasi and miss Rarity.

Shining Armour and his platoon had arrived on the scene, however, to find the Humans both dead, seemingly crushed under a market stand. Obviously, somepony or Human had been fleeing from the infected creatures and had either tipped over or caused the Humans to tip over the stall, conveniently neutralising them both.

That should have been the end of the investigation, and the Guards were ready to consider the threat ended until one of the more sharp-eyed soldiers had pointed out something strange. Once they had pulled the stand away from the corpses, it had become evident that they had several strange injuries that didn’t correlate to their story.

Bruises and heavy fracturing around one of their necks, and the other one was completely missing their lower jaw alongside having a ton of broken bones itself. Whatever had gotten into a scuffle with the two of them, they had done serious damage. In fact, the stall seemed to have been a completely unnecessary touch, but presumably whoever did it wished to inflict as much damage as possible.

The issue stemmed from the fact that no Pony could have inflicted those kinds of wounds. An Earth Pony pulling tight on a lasso might have explained away the larger Human’s neck injuries, but there was no rope nearby and all the Earth Ponies in town were hidden away in the castle. A Unicorn could potentially have torn off the other Human’s lower jaw with magic, but that was the least efficient way to fight off an infected Human, and there were absolutely no other signs of magical injuries. A Pegasus was also out of the question, because there was no reason that they would have to engage the Humans at all. Even the bearer of Loyalty wasn’t brash enough to face off two burly infected Humans when they could simply fly out of range.

That left only the possibility that a Human caused the damage, but the implications of that were worrying indeed. For a Human to have fought off two presumably bigger Humans as handily as they did, they must have been extraordinarily savage, but more worryingly they possessed battle instincts. No regular Human would have gone for bone-shattering attacks to the neck, and only the neck. There should have been fractures and injuries all over the body of the infected if a proper fight had broken out. But whatever happened had not been a fight: it had been a slaughter.

They needed to find whatever Human did something like that, and apprehend it for the safety of everypony in town. Having something around that could brutalise two bigger Humans with ease and worrying strength was not a good idea for anypony involved.

When Shining Armour had made a beeline for the castle to tell the townsponies that the threat was over, however, he had come across a very strange sight indeed. The Ponies were already filing out of the castle, chatting amiably and preparing to go about their daily lives, although some stopped to wave at him.

Just inside the door, he greeted his sister and the rest of the Element bearers with his usual grace until something caught his eye.

A Human in the background, sitting against a wall and staring intently in his direction. Taking in the creature’s strange appearance, Shining Armour knew from that moment of eye contact that that was the Human who’d done it. He did not voice as such to his sister, though. Upon learning that Miss Fluttershy intended on taking it home, the Captain was quick to formulate plans.

Within two hours, he’d requisitioned a group of watchhumans from Canterlot and had them posted around Ponyville, and set up his squad of Guards to keep vigil over the town.

And sure enough, after over a week of waiting, his extended stay had paid off.

Now the entirety of the Royal Guard platoon surrounded one of the bigger barns in Sweet Apple Acres, edging closer and closer as they prepared to subdue the Human.

The plan was simple: his most trusted lieutenant, Stout Shield, would raise the massive piece of wood that Miss Applejack had placed, and fling open the door with his magic. Without giving the Human time to react, the entire squad would fall upon it in a coordinated attack. The Pegasi would throw weighted nets over it, while the Unicorns were to fight strictly from range, and to focus on holding the Human down with telekinesis. The few Earth Ponies of the group had a comparatively simple but much more difficult job: keeping the Human distracted so that it couldn’t go after any of the others.

That was how it was supposed to go, at least, until the first step of the plan was complete. Stout Shield’s horn lit up, and the log of wood floated gently and slowly upwards so as to make as little noise as possible. No sense in alerting the Human, after all.

Just as the Unicorn started to focus on the doors, they started moving of their own accord, or so it seemed. They swung open until the space in the middle was just enough to fit a Human through, and that’s exactly what happened.

From the darkness within, their target emerged from the shadows, its black outfit making him appear like a spectre in the night. It was clutching its hat, and had a furious scowl on its face. More worryingly than all of this, however, was the call that came from one of the slightly closer Guards.

“A weapon! Celestia, it’s got a knife!” cried one of the Pegasi.

Sure enough, the Human was clutching a wicked-looking butterfly knife in its hand. Where it had acquired such a thing, Shining Armour couldn’t begin to guess, but the threat level of the creature had almost tripled if it knew how to wield it. Much to their horror, it did; flipping the handle around in its hand, the knife folded and unfolded several times until the Human settled on having it unsheathed.

Without their Captain needing to say a word, the squad leapt into immediate action.

The four closest Ponies consisted of three Earth Ponies and a Pegasus. The former three split into a triangle formation, charging the Human and simultaneously allowing two supporting Unicorns further back in the line to envelop them in a glimmering turquoise barrier. Several Pegasi took to the air, holding folded nets made of thick rope and weighted down with heavy steel balls. They flew over the head of the Human, quick to drop both of the nets in a way that was almost unavoidable. The rest of the Guards, all Unicorns, started focusing their magic to grip the creature, attempting to stop it in its tracks before it could even retaliate. It was overkill, really.

They never stood a chance.

Shining Armour blinked once, and the Human had moved, already many meters off to the left of where he once was. The nets dropped from the sky, flopping uselessly to the floor as the Earth Ponies had to stop their charge in confusion.

It held onto its hat tighter, and crouched low to the ground for all but a second. The Captain didn’t even have time to shout out a warning as he realised what was happening. The Human sprang upwards, higher than any normal Human or Pony should ever be able to jump. The Pegasi weren’t ready either, still staring down at the missed nets as it flew up towards them.

Tempest Wing didn’t even get to cry out as the Human twisted its body, flipping around in a somersault and sticking its leg straight outwards. The Pegasus was axe-kicked straight downwards, sent streaking into the ground with a bad-sounding smack.

The two remaining Pegasi charged immediately, assuming that the Human was vulnerable now that he’d used up all his momentum and was out of his element, flailing in the air. They were disproven quickly when he turned in the air to face the trio as he fell, seeming to regard them curiously.

Hazama glared at the three approaching fliers, debating how badly he felt like hurting them, and whether or not it was worth revealing Ouroboros at this stage. It probably wasn’t, given how much of an advantage it could give him so long as they were unaware of it. But how to deal with these flying idiots now that he had less momentum…?

He didn’t have time to think about that as a bolt of purple light whizzed past his ear, missing by an inch thanks to him moving his head sideways just in time. Unfortunately it missed any of the Pegasi, but it did make him hurry his thought process. The fact that they were shooting their magic at him now meant that they had already given up on simply subduing him, if the heat behind that beam was any indication. Fine by him, it would only make things more fun when they failed.

His hand slipped his knife back into its pocket. He wouldn’t need it.

As the closest of the flying horses closed the distance by another inch, Hazama acted. He flipped forward so that his body was facing towards them, his hand held out. His fingers clenched tightly around the Pegasi’s outstretched hoof, and pulled backwards.

The horse let out a yelp of surprise as his body changed trajectory, dragged underneath the Human’s body. At this rate, this close to the ground, he was going to be what broke the Human’s fall, and there wasn’t much he could do to stop it.

Hazama faintly heard one of the voices barking an order, and within a moment the speed of their descent dropped, floating gently downwards a meter or so from the ground. In order to save their companion, they had to save him too. Perfect.

Now with a platform of sorts beneath him, Hazama stood up, ignoring the pained groans of the horse beneath him. He turned sideways and raised an arm, flexing it.

The next Pegasi didn’t realise what the Human was trying to do until he was met with a solid elbow to the helmet, sending him crashing into the floor along with the one from before.

Not missing a beat, Hazama leapt from the horse he was standing on and allowed its friends to take it to safety, turning to face the remainders of the squad sent to capture him. All of the flying ones had been successfully taken care of, leaving only the trio of basic horses and five of the magical ones. Heading the group was the same stallion from back at the castle, ‘Shining Armour’ if his memory served correctly. That one seemed to be the one giving the orders. Perhaps it would be best to deal with him first…?

They were all watching him, infinitely more wary than they had been previously. While Hazama could get forward and take out the commander before they could do anything about it, he felt that it would be much more fun to simply watch back, enjoying the sight of them squirming over what to do. Oh, and he’d make sure to appear as gormless and stupid as a regular Human while he waited, too.

Shining Armour glared angrily at the Human, and the groaning bodies nearby. This Human, or whatever it was… It was unnatural, and like nothing he had ever seen before. Humans could be vicious fighters, that was true, but never like what he’d just witnessed. But then he had witnessed it, so it must have been the truth.

The remainder of his squad were muttering to each other through clenched teeth.

“W-What is that thing?”

“Tempest Wing…”

“What can we do…?”

“It just took them all out! One hit! It only took one hit!”

And then it was Shining Armour’s turn to speak up, turning to face his companions with an uneasy gaze. “Then don’t get hit.”

The Guards were not satisfied with that explanation. Frowns dotted all of their faces, and they stared at one another nervously. The Earth Ponies took the brief lull in activity to re-join the rest of the unit, all of them looking extremely grim.

“Did you see how fast it was moving, sir?” One of them spoke gruffly, keeping its eyes locked on the Human who currently looked like any other Human, albeit with clothes. And knives in those clothes.

Shining Armour nodded. “I did, Boulder Dash. It’s much too fast to be caught with conventional methods,” he said, before turning to face the Unicorns, “Why were you not apprehending him with telekinesis?”

“We tried! No matter how hard we all focused, the spell just seemed to fade when it reached him!” One black-coated Unicorn spoke out, not entirely happy with the implication that they had been watching their teammates get dismantled.

The Captain fixed them with a stern glare, “So you’re telling me that magic’s out as well?”

Upon receiving hesitant nods, Shining Armour let out a rare curse, turning to face the waiting Human properly. He hated looking at the creature, if only because he disliked it looking at him. Though it was impossible, it looked like it was studying him with those golden eyes. That was another thing. The eyes, they weren’t… Weren’t natural. Whenever they flickered over in his direction after scanning the rest of the squad, the Captain felt a deep shudder run through the back of his spine.

Everypony in the platoon tensed up as the Human apparently grew bored of standing around. The creature took a step to the left, inching closer to the still-downed body of Tempest Wing. Stout Shield was the first one to draw his spear, no longer willing to take any risks against the creature. He was stopped in his tracks just as he started to advance as the Human's sharp gaze locked straight onto him, staring him down as neither moved an inch.

The Human raised his foot off the ground, standing on one leg much to the confusion of the Ponies gathered. They weren't given much time to try and comprehend the inexplicable balancing act before it turned on its remaining heel, bringing its foot down hard upon the body of their comrade.

'I'm sick of this', he crushed the horse under his boot and lifted his foot up again 'damned', he did the same thing again, faster than before, 'planet' again the body of the horse let out a choked cry, swiftly silenced as his foot came down once more 'and its goddamn horses!'

Hazama didn't stop after that. Time after time, faster than the horses watching in horror could even decipher, he stomped the bruised, battered Guard again and again, years upon years of hidden frustration and anger boiling to the surface. Even as the horse's choking screams stopped entirely, it took him a solid ten seconds of continued punishment before the pace of his assault slowed.

Not even out of breath, he gave a few final strikes before halt entirely with a last kick, planting his shoe against the side of the Pegasus' face. 'Not even worth my time anymore' Hazama mused bitterly, drawing his leg backwards for one last sideways hit to the back. The horse went through the air and hit a tree, sinking to the ground without a squeak.

Whatever spell that the rest of the horses were under broke at that point. An array of snarling faces directed right at him, now filled with the intent to kill, to put down the creature that dared disrespect their companion in such a way.

'Good.' Hazama thought, turning to properly face the remnants of the squad as he pulled his hands out of his pockets, 'Maybe now they'll suck less at fighting.'

He really didn't have anything left to lose. If his secret wasn't gone by this point, there was no helping them. Any chance of mercy he might have had was also long absent, and the frenzied assault on their friend can't have helped matters. He wished somewhat that he hadn't lost control of himself. It had never happened before, and it felt disturbingly similar to when Terumi would assume direct control. All restraint went out the window, and any respect for the opponent along with it. Not to say that Hazama had any of the latter to begin with, but still.

Actually... An idea began to form in his mind. Something that no being in their right mind would fall for, but just might work against creatures that were as dumb as these. He would have to probably reveal his secret, but if he were to let them know that he'd been, say, not in control of his own actions due to an outside force...

His face, once entering the stages of a cocky smirk, dropped into a sudden, frightened frown. He whipped around towards the fallen Pegasus from before, and sprinted over to him, ignoring the cries of dismay from the Guards behind.

When he came up to the broken body, he knelt down, placing his hands atop its... chest? Body? Whatever it was called, he went through the signs of checking for life. When he found a light, shaky rise and fall, he sighed in relief, leaning back against the tree. It took a herculean amount of effort, but he forced himself to cry. Tiny streaks of tears running down his cheeks, making him seem for all the world to just be a scared Human.

The Guards finally approached, hesitant at first but now marching at full strength, intent on dealing grevious harm to the Human. That is, before they saw what he was doing. Upon seeing them approach and subsequently halt in confusion, Hazama stifled a smirk of satisfaction and continued to cry, scrambling away from the horses in apparent abject terror.

"What... What the hay is it doing?" asked one, still trying to keep a threatening growl in his voice but failing out of sheer confusion.

The one recognised as the Captain tore his gaze from the weeping Human and back to Tempest Wing's thankfully living body. "I... I don't know. I honestly don't know, Yellow Scroll."

"Who gives a buck?!" A particularly angry voice cried out from beside the Captain, "That pile of horseapples just buckin' killed Tempest!"

"He's not dead, Boulder."

"So BUCKIN WHAT, CAPTAIN? He might as well 'ave!"

'Damn' Hazama mused, forcing more and more tears out from his eyes. Calling them Crocodile tears would be an understatement of the highest calibre, 'One of them's actually got some sense about them. Seriously, who'd fall for this shit?'

The stallion leading the merry group threw a hoof over the angry one's side, holding him back and comforting him at the same time.

"I know you're frustrated. Believe me, we all want justice for what happened here today. But this Human, whatever it is, isn't normal. Something's very wrong with it, and it's been obvious ever since the incident in town. It was my fault for underestimating it. However, I've never seen or heard of one showing remorse like that before, or fight anything like it did just a second ago. This could be a huge discovery for all we know, and as much as I would like to, we can't beat the hay out of it just yet."

Its face turned to glare down at the Human, whose eyes were locked onto the body he'd been destroying just a moment ago in fear.

"We'll leave that up to the Princesses. You were recording the encounter as protocol, right Watchful Eye?"

That garnered a nod from one of the Unicorns.

"Right then. Boulder, Stout Shield, pick up Tempest and get him to the hospital in Ponyville. Yellow Scroll, you and I will take Zephyr and Monsoon as they're less injured." Shining Armour commanded, pointing out the Ponies he requested, and their targets. Then he waved a hoof towards the Human on the floor, "The rest of you, restrain him. We're taking him to Princess Celestia."

Hazama had to resist the urge to grin, frown, and scream in frustration yet again. They seriously bought his little act? Seriously?

Sometimes he wasn't sure if dealing with creatures this stupid was a massive curse, or a massive blessing.

Author's Note

Feel like the last bit went by a bit too quickly, but I had to close off the chapter somehow I suppose. A bit more could have been done with the Guards mistrusting him before agreeing to not slaughter him in cold blood, but that would have been redundant in my opinion.

And yes, if it wasn't blatantly obvious, the barn scene isn't happening. I should never have even mentioned it, really.

If any of you are looking for a visual representation of what just the stomping looked like, however, well... This isn't the smoothest gif, and it's not the full version i'm thinking of, but it's the best I could find.

Music section! Here we have 'In the Shadows', the theme of Hibiki Kohaku. Or, as he has a colour scheme and weapons that directly reference it, 'Attack on Titan man'

Snakes on a Train

Over the past two minutes, Hazama had made the decision that he would never allow himself to be chained up again. Walking with the constant noise of metal sliding and tapping against metal was not fun, and was made even less desirable by the constant prods of spears against his back. Yes, spears. The blunt end, thankfully, but that was only because the first time the more irritated Guards had tried to 'encourage' him to keep moving, he had changed his pitiable expression to the same one he'd held just before his earlier outburst. The prodding lessened in frequency significantly.

Keeping up an act or not, he was not letting them poke holes in his suit just because they were a little miffed that he'd kicked the shit out of their friend or whatever. 'It's almost like they actually care about each other or something.' Hazama snorted internally.

It was an otherwise quiet group that made its way along the dirt path back towards the town proper. The one called Shining Armour took the front, his lieutenants took one side of him each, and that left the other remaining Guards to keep hold of Hazama and keep him walking. Annoyingly, it appeared that the 'remaining Guards' were the ones who seriously had it out for him, and apparently couldn't see the logic in their Captain's plan.

Barely any words were spoken since they had left the farm. None of the Guards particularly agreed with Shining Armour's decision to not injure the Human, but none of them wanted to be the ones to call him out on it. They took turns holding onto the Human's chains with their magic, the restraints having been improvised once they realised that levitation truly wasn't working on him for some reason; yet another factor that pointed to something being extremely odd with the Human.

"Sir..." One of the Guards not currently keeping the Human restrained said tentatively, drawing the eyes of her Captain, who quirked an eyebrow as a sign for the stallion to continue.

"You know I've never questioned your plans before,"

'Then you're an idiot.' Hazama noted dully, allowing his eyes to wander.

"But is it truly wise to bring this Human to the Princesses? What if he manages to... Assault them?"

Shining Armour didn't respond, and looked back in the direction he was walking, noting that they were getting close to Ponyville. Getting seen with the Human there could be trouble. They would all recognise him from the morning's altercation and the events of a week prior, and on the offchance that miss Fluttershy was there... It wasn't a risk worth taking.

"...Sir?" The same mare from before piped up, getting warning hisses and glares from the rest of the squad. If the Captain didn't answer, then he had good reason to. That's how it always was. That, and he was technically a Prince, too, so had far greater agency with potential punishments than most.

"Remix Heart." The Captain glanced at the Pony in question, making her shift nervously as she was reminded just who she was dealing with. Just as she thought she was to be reprimanded for 'insubordination', Shining Armour spoke up again.

"Do you think we should take the train to Canterlot, or should we order another batch of Pegasi Guards to fly us there by chariot?" he said, subverting the given question entirely with another one in its place. He raised a hoof into the air as he turned to face the platoon.

With the unspoken command, the group halted in place with Ponyville in clear view a short distance away. Hazama made sure that his halting would get in the way of one of the Guards, just because.

It was a fair inquiry, and one they hadn't considered. Their original plan was to capture the Human and take him back to Canterlot by the chariot they'd came in on, but due to the handy dismantling of their Pegasi they had no way of travelling back to the castle without either of the offered options. The train was riskier, because they would expose the Human to civilians even more defenseless as they had been, as well as giving the Human a bigger chance to escape as they'd be travelling on ground-level. It was, however, quicker than sending a request for Pegasi, getting them all the way to Ponyville, and then flying back again. They would be tired from the initial flight, too, and would need a large number of minutes as recuperation.

Hazama, however, was distinctly less stumped by the decision. 'Did they seriously just offer a chariot and a train as options of similar viability? For that matter, how do they have trains?! I didn't think their level of technology was even remotely close to that. I mean, their houses had thatched roofs! Thatched roofs!' he bemoaned, growing more and more baffled by the disparity concerning every aspect of the species he was forced to deal with.

The mare named Remix Heart, having been technically asked the question first, raised a hoof to give an answer.

"S-Sir! I think we should wait for a new group of Pegasi. It would be less dangerous for the civilians, and he wouldn't be able to get away if he was in the air." she explained, quite happy with her logic until the gruff voice of Stout Shield piped up from her side.

"Yeah, but then we'll be stuck waiting here for over an hour, an' there's no telling when the Human'll get over this phase and go back to stompin' us into the ground again. Better to get goin' sooner rather than later, an' there's less places for him to escape to on the train."

Hazama stopped listening once the rest of the Guards started to pitch in with their opinions, but kept up his depressed facade regardless. Whatever outcome they reached through whatever asinine reasoning they desired, the result would be the same. He would keep up his act until he came into contact with these 'Princesses'. Particularly, he was hoping to meet one of them specifically, namely the one that had invaded his dream during his first night on the planet.

That incident still shook him slightly, even if that exact sentiment never occurred. She had left his dream with the promise that she would be back the next night, so inevitably he'd made sure to imagine his office from before when the sun dropped again. When she didn't show up (to his knowledge, and least) he tried it again the next evening. The trend continued ever since, much to Hazama's extreme irritation. He couldn't do anything interesting with his dreams anymore, on the off-chance that she would finally make a reappearance.

Meeting that Princess was, then, his main objective. She would hopefully be able to instantly recognise his appearance, and the circumstances of their last talk, so it would be far easier to get her on his side. He could spin his arrogance at the time as some form of defence mechanism against the being in occasional control of his body, and hopefully that would appease her. It helped that it was a lie based quite heavily in truth.

Hazama broke from his musings when the Guards' bickering grew loud enough to be a large source of irritation for both him and their Captain, whose face screwed up in an ever-deepening grimace until eventually the noise was too much.

"Enough!" Shining Armour shouted, the uproar coming to an immediate halt as the squad turned to look at the stallion. "We are some of the Royal Guard's finest, and I won't stand by and listen to you all act like a bunch of schoolfillies!"

The group had the sense to look sheepish, even the more stoic members of the party. Their Captain, meanwhile, continued speaking.

"I've come to an executive decision. Based on the fact that the Human, while currently docile, has displayed extraordinary physical ability far beyond any other of his kind, and far above ourselves individually (loath as I am to admit it), we are to take the mode of transportation that grants him the least chance of escape. Unfortunately, there are no perfect options in this situation. The ideal move would be to ask Princess Sparkle for assistance via group teleportation, but doing so would distract her from her schedule, which I have discovered is highly packed today due to certain information networks of mine."

The Guards listening to his spiel repressed snorts of amusement as the Captain's face morphed into a semi-playful grin. Everypony who knew Shining Armour even the smallest amount would know just how close he and his sister were. There was no doubt in anypony's mind that the stallion had just flat-out asked whether the Princess was busy or not.

"However, in lieu of any superior option, our best bet is to take the train." He quickly held up a hoof to silence the disagreement threatening to escape Remix Heart. "We wouldn't be able to requisition enough Pegasi from their duties to come help all of us, and that's hoping that the ones we could get would even be strong enough to carry us and our equipment. It's also quicker to get on to the Train and be on our way to Canterlot, especially as the next train should leave at about noon, which it will be in fifteen minutes. Any objections?"

Shining Armour surveyed the crowd. A sea of nodding heads met his eye, and then he turned to glance at the Human, who seemed to be looking right back at him in mild curiosity. The kind of look that one would give a child when wordlessly pretending to adore their crayon scribble. The stallion felt himself involuntarily release a shudder when the Human's eyes finally moved away from him. He did not appreciate the fact that he'd have to spend over an hour watching the creature, not at all.

"Then it's settled. Watchful Eye, send a report ahead of ourselves to inform Princess Celestia of the time of our arrival once we have boarded the train. Send along the Recording Crystal too. She'll want to see this."

Princess Celestia was not a fan of bad news. Bad news meant repairs. Bad news meant complaining Nobles, and reimbursing them for damages. Bad news, incidentally, often meant Ponyville.

When the call had come from Twilight that the town was suffering a potentially devastating outbreak of the Black Vine Virus, Celestia hadn't worried overly much. Her precious student was smart, and even more usefully she was well versed in dealing with town-wide problems. Not necessarily in the most efficient manner possible, and usually with more damages than usual, but not once had there been any fatal accidents or dangers ever since she had arrived there those few years ago. The Tirek incident didn't count, due to its nature as a national disaster rather than a threat contained to a specific town.

All of that in mind, the Princess had been pleasantly unsurprised to recieve a report soon afterwards from her student that everything had worked out just fine. The polite smile adorning her lips had slipped gradually away as she continued to read, and the holes in the story became concerning.

Within a few minutes, a hasty letter had been sent through to Shining Armour and the rest of the platoon, ordering them to extend their stay in the town to ensure that whatever was able to neutralise two infected Humans was not able to hurt anypony else.

And then, just a few moments ago, another report had made its way in front of her, drawing her attention away from the seventh Noble of the day, who was visibly unhappy with the interruption of his rambling. Not that Celestia cared overly much, though she made it seem as though she was actually apologetic to intrude upon his impassioned speech. It wasn't a convincing act at all, if she was honest, but the stallion seemed so starstruck that the Princess herself was apologising to him, so he didn't notice the underlying tones of distaste. Another tally on the chart for how many times a Noble could avoid the context of a remark entirely.

"Blue Spellbook" Celestia called out, causing the named stallion to glance up from his script writing, "I need you to inform my sister that her presence shall be required in the throne room in approximately an hour."

The stoic Pony shot her a disbelieving stare, placing his quill to the side. She didn't blame him for that. Waking up Luna during the day tended to be a poor decision unless the time and date had already been decided beforehand. It would take several cups of coffee for her to feel awake at mid-day, but it was necessary. There wasn't much time for dilly-dallying now that she had a new problem to deal with.

Princess Celestia turned to face the Noble she'd left waiting, glanced back at the fairly sizable queue outside the door, and then sighed minutely.

"My subjects, I am afraid a matter of utmost importance has arisen. Day court is now closed for the time being, but I would be more than glad to recieve your queries through mail or a visit tomorrow instead."

It took a lot of willpower to ignore the melodramatic cries from behind her as she turned around, pausing to send a nod towards the identical Guards by the door, recieving one in return. The two alabaster Unicorns grasped the heavy doors with their magic, swinging them shut despite the cries of protest from outside.

The Alicorn of the Day let out another, much more audible sigh as she stepped off of her throne, sauntering into the middle of the room. From the corner of her eye, she could spot the suitably azure coat of Blue Spellbook scamper off into a nearby corridor. She silently wished him luck in his endeavour, and prayed that Luna wouldn't be too disgruntled with being awake. Celestia enjoyed her scribe conscious and healthy. After all, somepony had to take note of what the Nobles were actually saying, and there were many days where she simply didn't care enough to do so herself.

But it was still important for Luna to see what Celestia had just acquired from the Royal Guards in Ponyville. If the written report was anything to go by, then the reflective yellow gem she held in her hooves would contain images that could potentially turn everything their society knew about Humans on its head.

Recording Gems were a relatively recent invention. Invented, designed, and patented by Royal Unicorn scientist Sir Veil Lance, the seemingly tiny chunks of amber could be activated by a certain spell, and would proceed to read and record both sound and light in the area it was facing. It could store up to half a minute of footage at first, and not that many Ponies were impressed with the applications. When the storage capacity reached ten minutes, Ponies got intrigued by the idea. Once they were able to hold half an hour of footage and could be mass produced, however, the Royal Guard found a use for them as a way to gather evidence of what suspects were saying and doing at the time of apprehension, as well as tools to warn of incoming threats where words wouldn't be as easy to convey the issue.

That is not to say that non-military Ponies didn't find their own uses for the device. While each gem could only hold a single, uninterrupted run before being overwritten by another, a lot of citizens had used them to record special family occasions and events such as wedding ceremonies, preserving the memories.

Unfortunately, Celestia had the sinking feeling in her stomach that the particular crystal she held in her hand was not for anything pleasant. The reports had spoken of a Human powerful enough to defeat four of some of the best Pegasi in the main Guard force, and apparently a Unicorn with the squad had caught the event on the gem.

Her ears pricked up, and the rest of the Guards in the room turned to face a window at the same time as she did. Shouting, in the distance. Luna was awake, then.

Grimly, Celestia brought the parchment from before up to her eyes, casting her gaze over the message one last time.

[Your Majesty.

On behalf of Captain Armour, I, Watchful Eye, am sending you this update on the situation in Ponyville. We have apprehended the creature that we were looking for. A Human. About six feet tall, measuring by eye. It did not appear to be heavily muscled, but this is a guise. This Human, with one solid blow each, was able to swiftly take down the four Pegasi we brought with us, including Tempest Wing.

The creature, as it does not seem fitting to call this being a Human, moved at speeds absolutely impossible for any other specimen. It is also notable that the creature wore clothes. A suit, waistcoat, and hat. It also carried with it a Butterfly Knife, which it held comfortably. It did not utilise the weapon, and there was nothing stopping it from doing so. Why it did not harm the Pegasi further is unknown at this time.

It displayed extraordinarily high levels of aggression towards us, even before we had made any move to detain it. The standard apprehension plan was used on this creature, and it absolutely failed. In fact, and this is only my own opinion Your Majesty, the only reason we were not all taken down by this creature was because it stopped itself. After a period of continued assault on the downed Tempest Wing, it turned to face us with clear threatening intent. However, in the blink of an eye, the creature paused. Its face changed into an expression previously unseen on any Human, and it ran back over to Tempest Wing before any of us could make a move. To our surprise, it began to cry. After this began, it showed no hesitance in allowing us to restrain it, until one of us tried to remove its hat from its head, to which it froze up and stared at the Guard that had attempted the action.

The injured Pegasi have been sent to the hospital in Ponyville, and we now have the creature in our custody. We are currently aboard the train bound to Canterlot. We believe it is best that this creature have its fate decided by Your Grace, as it has displayed actions and behaviours unlike any other Human in Equestria.

We arrive in Canterlot within the hour of this message's arrival, and we will be at the castle with the creature in tow shortly after.

Enclosed is a Recording Gem that has footage of the failed first apprehension attempt towards the creature, as per protocol.]

Upon finishing her third re-reading of the note, Celestia's sharp eye caught sight of a patch on the blank portion of the parchment that appeared to hold a quality that she couldn't quite place. A simple spell revealed another paragraph of text, this time written in a tone much less formal. The message painted a much bleaker picture than before, if possible. The Princess found herself frowning as she reached the end.

[Your Majesty. I apologise for the concealing spell, but this is an urgent matter. The other Guards, including the Captain, do not know I have sent this extra message. The creature is too dangerous to be kept alive. I don't care what Captain Armour says: this thing was able to neutralise four of our best Pegasi without any visible strain. I can only say that a being like this should not exist upon the face of Equestria. While that may be cause for others to celebrate a new oddity, I disagree. This Human must be euthanised for the good of all Ponies.]

Until she and her sister could review the recording for themselves, such a decision could never be made. A Royal Decree specifically to euthanise a single Human? Preposterous! It would be akin to a death penalty, and that had been abolished in Equestria for centuries, even before Luna's banishment!

But a part of her, deep down in a place that Celestia would never admit existed, began to agree with Watchful Eye's conclusion.

Author's Note

This chapter was really hard to write and I don't know why. I just had, like, zero idea of what I wanted to say. I knew where it needed to end up, and the main plot points, but still. It didn't help that I had a ton of work to do over the last two days either, and technically I still have some to get done.

Still, trust me to take a full week to upload a disappointingly short chapter straight after talking about being 'as close to daily as possible'.

The ending of this chapter isn't even good. None of this chapter is good. But it needed to happen.

Instead of the usual music segment which doesn't really get much attention, I am instead going to showcase a 20 minute video of the video game Guilty Gear Xrd Revelator, specifically the character introductions, their finishing moves/fatalities, and their victory animations. It's made by the same company as the BlazBlue games.

I specifically do this because Guilty Gear Revelator has the most ridiculously pretty animation for a fighting game, and yes it's anime as fuck.

Snakes on a Train: Part 2

The view outside the train was something that Hazama never thought he would be able to experience firsthand. It wasn't the trees, necessarily, or the fact that birds could plainly be seen flying through the air without a worry in the world. It was the picture as a whole. The culmination of all the little elements that never had the chance to survive in his previous world, surviving and thriving in harmony with one another. It would have been fairly pleasant to just keep staring out of the window to see what else this world could offer him, but there was the small matter of the irritating little horse staring holes into the side of his head.

It wasn't unusual. The rest of the Guards had also spent most of their efforts glaring angrily in his direction, and that particular attitude didn't wane in the least once they'd sorted out seats on the train. The trip would take approximately an hour or so from what he could gather by ear, and apparently they would be rotating the one watching over him every ten minutes or so. Thirty minutes had passed since the mare had been shoved into the barren compartment with him, and there was no sign of her getting a reprieve from his extraordinary company. That is to say, he was being completely silent and doing his best to ignore the horse that had seemed utterly resigned to her fate after the twenty minute mark.

Hazama repressed an irritated twitch as the brown horse let out a pathetic sigh for the umpteenth time since boarding the train. If there was one thing he loathed, it was people without any sort of drive. Those who could see themselves mistreated, could see injustices, yet made no move to counteract it. That sort of person was weak, but more importantly was absolutely no fun to defeat. The best kind of victories came from crushing one with resolve, seeing that instant pass through their eyes when they realise just how royally screwed they are. This horse was none of those things. If she was actually annoyed at her 'friends' for what they were doing, then she should actually do something to retaliate. Or so he thought, anyway. Maybe it was a cultural thing. But then from his experience, their culture seemed to be having animals that had more common sense than they themselves, as Angel the Rabbit proved.

Huh. He actually found himself missing the company of the little sadist bastard, and he'd seen him just this morning. Not for the first time, Hazama found himself briefly stunned by the massive overhaul to his life over the past two weeks. It had its moments of being irritating beyond any reasonable measure, but it was a damn sight better than his time spent on Earth as what was essentially a pawn manipulating other pawns while the king and queen had themselves a jolly old time ruining everyone's day, or at least planning to.

At the time, he was able to disguise his bitterness towards Terumi by means of plotting his vengeance in a friendly manner, and while that may sound strange, it was the truth. The ghost knew full well that Hazama wasn't taking his lot in life lying down, and near the end of everything it had almost become a joke. Hazama had thought he'd won after dumping Terumi in the Boundary and leaving him to waste away, but then the Embryo had fucked everything up and then everything just got a little bit complicated.

It was a strange feeling to miss the days when he was unaware of that entire mess, climbing the NOL's Intelligence ladder rung by rung without needing to worry about being controlled by a literal ghost from the past

"He never liked me."

The voice alerted Hazama to the glorious fact that the horse had stopped sighing, and to the not-so-glorious fact that she was now starting to talk to him out of a combination of boredom and nervousness. He didn't know if that was just a thing that these horses did with all of their pets, or just Humans, but it was a very unfortunate deal for him. Regardless, he lazily turned from the scenic view to fix one eye on the Guard sat next to a wall, her helmet placed on the floor as she tapped her hooves together nervously.

"Boulder Dash, I mean. He, ah, never liked me, even when we were foals." the mare spoke, a wobbly undertone to her voice that made it sound as though she was going to start crying at any moment. Hazama really didn't think he could deal with a crying Guard on top of trying to make himself seem sad all the time, but there wasn't much he could do about it.

"He always called me funny names, and my sister, Variable Heart, got it way worse. Things got a little better in high school, y'know? He calmed down, got all stoic, and actually started to be polite to me!"

Hazama felt like groaning. He could already tell precisely where this story was going.

"We even... We even went out together for a f-few months..."

'Oh goody, here it comes...'

The mare definitely had pinpricks of tears appearing at the corners of her eyes, and Hazama chose that moment to look back at the window, finding the scenery far more interesting than dating problems concerning Guards that actually fell for his stupidly simple act.

"T-Then when I... When I put in a good word for him at the Academy and got him training as a Royal Guard h-h-he just... It was all an..."

"You're actually badmouthin' me to that freak?" A low voice interjected whatever the horse was about to say, drawing the attention of both the caboose's current inhabitants.

In the doorway stood one of the Earth Pony stallions from before that had failed to rush Hazama. Clad in the same golden armour as every other Guard, the horse had a coat of cleanly trimmed dark green fur, topped by a head of two-toned brown-black hair. He held a relaxed posture, slouching against the doorframe as he directed a mocking smirk towards the mare, completely ignoring the presence of the chained Human.

The brown horse seemed to shrink in on herself, sitting lower to the ground than before and refusing to look directly at the new arrival in the train carriage.

"Tch. Figures only a dumb beast'd care about your little sob story, eh?" the stallion grinned widely, strutting into the compartment as though he owned the place. With a slight shake of his head, he dislodged his helmet and tucked it under one hoof. Standing tall above the sitting mare, he leaned down and gave her a quick, 'friendly' jab in the side. "C'mon, Remix Heart, even for you... that's pretty pathetic!"

'Oh I can tell this is going to go just greaaaaat.' Hazama sighed, glaring wearily in the two horse's direction as they had their little domestic. At least now he had a name to go with the one that'd been dumping her life's problems on him. Remix Heart. Somehow, the name felt vaguely familiar, like he'd heard it some past life. Or, er, some other past life. Really, it was quite funny how many common phrases got so much more complicated when applied to his existence.

In all honesty, he couldn't care less about a familiar name or whatever problems the two horses had with each other, but the decision of who he felt like spending the last half an hour of the journey with was one that he had to make. And somehow enforce, given his position. He could always get a little bit aggressive towards the male one to give him a reason to leave, but that would mean he would be stuck listening to a ranting woman with nothing else to do, and he'd had more than enough of that to last a lifetime. There was also the option of just letting the situation play out to its conclusion, and it wasn't like he'd ever have to deal with these particular horses ever again.

Idly, he wondered what happened to Fluttershy after his rather dramatic disappearance from town. He wasn't worried about her being worried, that was just a given from what little experience he had with the mare, but he was mildly curious as to how Angel would make the most out of the situation. Probably hogging the beanbag every night, the little shit.

"What was that, Hearty? C'mon, speak up, i'm your superior y'know!" the stallion's cruel guffaws grated against Hazama's ears, dragging him out of his pondering. He had no idea what he had missed, but he really didn't care.

"I... I said... if he's such a dumb beast, why'd he avoid your charge? I thought you were meant to be the best! And you're not allowed to... To call me that anymore!"

'What's this? The horses actually paying attention to logical facts? What sort of crazy alternate world have I entered?' He thought. And wasn't it humorous that it was a totally serious, legitimate question? Two weeks in this world, pretty much, and he still didn't really have any idea about its history, or its nature in general. The little town seemed to be decent enough, when it wasn't being attacked by zombie Humans or patrolled by Guards. If that was the standard for technological and social advancement, then he would have been just dandy, but it wasn't. Somehow they also had large steam-trains as well. Not that the idea of a steam-train was impressive to Hazama in the least, but it was a damn sight more impressive than the thatch roof buildings of the town would belie.

The stallion, however, didn't seem nearly as impressed with the solid fact he'd been presented. "So what? It's not like you and your band of ice-cream-cone heads did any better. Plus, the Human's a freak of nature, that's why we're takin' him to the Princesses. So they can get rid of him, or whatever." he waved a hoof in a disinterested manner until he let out a short, harsh chuckle. "And you hurt my feelings, Hearty, y' really do. What, I can't call my generous marefriend by my nice little pet name?"

"I... You...!" Remix Heart growled, scrambling onto all fours as the correct words seemed to utterly elude her. In lieu of properly formed arguments, angry grunts tore themselves from her throat. Seemingly without intending to, her horn lit up in an angry lime-green aura, sparks flying from the tip as the stallion paused for a moment, temporarily concerned. The hesitation was shaken off within an instant, but Hazama definitely caught it.

"And that ain't even the worst of it, right?" Boulder Dash continued with a malicious, taunting tone to his voice, stepping just a little bit closer, "You miss me, don'tcha? Miss the things I could do to you... Probably the best lay you're ever goin' to get in your life, right? Is that why you were gettin' all close to the freak over he-MPH?!"

He had been interrupted by a bolt of magic square to the blocky chin. It didn't appear to have any special properties, but it had a hell of a concussive force behind it apparently, as the body of the stallion went flying backwards into the steel wall of the train. Upon impact, the armour made a dull clanging noise as the previously cocky stallion fell to the floor on unsteady hooves. Already, he was shooting the mare a dark, satisfied grin.

"Heh. Heheheh!" The stallion began to chuckle as he brought his helmet back on top of his head, fixing it into place. "Didn't, heh, think you had it in you, Hearty! Damn, but I should really get you done in now, shouldn't I? Assaulting a superior officer like that..."

The furious glint immediately left the mare's eyes at those words. Her aura dropped as she scrambled several steps backwards, almost toppling over one of Hazama's outstretched legs.

"N-No..."

"Yep." Boulder Dash nodded, giving his body a quick shudder to shake off the lightly pulsing pain running through his back, "But I'm not goin' to. Because i'm really magnanimous like that. I mean hey, you gave me a lot back in the day. Only fair I give you some concessions too, huh?"

The mare said nothing in response, but continued to quake all over in a mixture of fear and the remnants of fury. Adrenaline still ran through her veins, her heart pumping wildly as a place deep in her mind demanded that she achieve proper vengeance, really hurt him. Years of training, however, allowed her to calm herself down. A slow process, taking a solid twenty seconds before she felt a little better. She paused, taking a deep, shuddering breath before exhaling just as slowly.

"... Thank. You. Sir. I think I can handle watch duty on my own."

The barely-contained anger seemed only to drive the stallion's amusement further than ever before as he turned around, starting to push the door to the secured compartment open again.

"Yeah, yeah, i'll make sure nopony gets in the way of you and your new fuckbuddy or whatever." Were the parting words that echoed through the carriage as Boulder Dash stepped around the corner and out of sight, closing the door behind him with a deceptively calm click.

Hazama was decidedly equal parts impressed and incredibly annoyed, all things considered. From what he could extrapolate from the biting exchange he'd just witnessed, the stallion was a schemer. The kind of person that'd murder somebody to get just a little headway in the world. The kind of person that would gladly break a person apart for personal gain. A man...Horse after his own heart. That was exactly the problem. Types like that couldn't really co-exist with each other, not even themselves. If Hazama found himself in a room with a precise, perfect copy of himself who happened to have the only way out of said room... The copy would probably attack him first, because he'd know what he was like. It was a complicated personality trait.

He turned his gaze towards Remix Heart to gauge her reaction, and at that exact moment, the mare seemed to keel over onto her side, faintly surprising Hazama with the sudden collapse. Her barrel seemed to jolt up and down like she was being electrocuted, but it was something that Hazama easily recognised as somebody silently sobbing, keeping their misery quiet so as to not alert anyone. A fragile silence pervaded the air as he carefully watched the horse wallow in self-pity.

Then the tears started coming, and the silence was broken by quiet sniffles every few seconds.

She didn't stop crying until they reached the station.

Author's Note

This was a much shorter chapter than I intended it to be, but every time I started writing the next scene I just couldn't shake the feeling that the next set of events required their own chapter rather than extending this one.

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That and i'm lazy and wanted a chapter out, but mostly the other thing.

I'm renaming the music section to just 'miscellaneous section' instead.

And on that note, have a short clip from the BlazBlue anime. It was a pretty poor adaptation, but some parts of it are always fun to watch. Like this one.

For a marginally more serious clip, here's the first meeting of Hakumen and Ragna the Bloodedge. They made it a lot better in the game, but in this version you also get to see the aforementioned Kokonoe from the first chapter, as well as Rachel.

Intermission: Character Shorts #1

Author's Note

Author's Note at the top instead of the bottom? Insanity!

But anyway, this is going to be a recurring series of chapters containing small snippets of how other BlazBlue characters in Equestria might turn out. This will not be the only one of these, and the basic idea behind the timing is just 'whenever the plot has hit a point where a break could be good' or 'if I get a little bored and want to write a bunch of nonsense'.

Most of them will focus mainly on comedy, but there might be ones with some different tones if I feel like doing so.

EDIT because I deleted this segment and apparently am retarded: These shorts do not necessarily take place in the YHAY-Verse, meaning that most of the characters will be able to talk and act normally unless otherwise stated

I hope it goes down well, because I had a lot of fun thinking up and writing some of these.

Oh and if it wasn't obvious, i'm also not intending to apply my 2k word minimum to these chapters either as they're just a bit of fun.

Intermission: Character Shorts #1

SCIENCE!
"What're you waitin' out here for, Pinkie?"

The mare in question turned her head, smiling at her friend before waving a hoof in the direction of the door she had been looking at. "Ooh, perfect timing! You're just in time to see Twilight's new friend do some science!"

Rainbow Dash tilted her head to the side, and could faintly hear the sounds of power tools from inside the room. Before she really knew it, she too had plopped herself down to wait for whatever was about to happen. If it was anything like what they'd seen previously, it would be worth the time.

It had been a few weeks since the weird Human had arrived in Equestria, and from the get-go things had immediately become strange. She didn't appear to be a friendly person at first. Or at all, really, but after striking up a conversation with Twilight about the many benefits of science over magic, they had sequestered away in a room for many hours. When they emerged, Twilight had been quite literally seen with sparkles in her eye and a notebook in her magic, with hundreds of slips of paper sticking out from the side. Without any question, the woman had been given a room to sleep in and a room to run experiments in. The next time they'd checked in on her, she had broken down the wall between the two areas and fused them into one.

Incidentally, the cat person had been heard mumbling 'sleep is for the weak' to herself like some sort of mantra the day after. Something about not having lollipops or whatever. Pinkie had been supply her with a whole basket's worth after hearing of this, and she had accepted them with a muttered 'thanks', which was surprising to most given how previously the woman seemed to hold extraordinary disdain for the overexcited party mare. The problem had apparently solved itself.

Rainbow spared a glance at her friend, who seemed to be vibrating rather than just bouncing up and down in excitement. "So what kinda science-y stuff is she doing?"

She received a wide grin in return, and the Pegasus knew she would be better off plugging her ears for the next five minutes. Against her better judgement, however, she really wanted to know what was happening.

"Well y'know how Coco didn't really like me at first but then started liking me a little bit once I gave her those lollipops?" Pinkie Pie began, and then promptly cut off her friend's attempted agreement by continuing, "So then I thought 'Wowie, she really likes sweets!' So obviously we should be best friends and so today I followed her around with a buncha candy but she didn't really seem interested, like she got that weird look in her eye and it was twitching loads, and she really has serious bags under her eyes but that's not important."

"Pinkie I think she miiiight'a wanted you to leave her alone..."

"Pssh! Naw~" The pink mare waved a hoof dismissively. "Anyway that's not important. So then she turned around and was like 'What the hay, uh, hell do you want?' and so I told her I wanted to help out with some science and that look in her eye turned into another look, like the ones Twilight gets whenever she's about to totally thrash someone in chess and then she went into this room and told me to wait here, which i'm doing!"

A pit of uneasiness opened in Rainbow Dash's gut. That exchange did not sound like a generally friendly one, and in her experience scientist-types got really vindictive whenever you annoyed them. The amount of times she'd been teleported in front of a tree mid-flight during particularly grueling flying lessons with Twilight could attest to that.

As if summoned by the appearance of fear, the doors swung open to reveal the cat-eared woman in a strange white ensemble and red trousers that left her stomach exposed. She held in her hand some weird water-pistol looking thing with a bright yellow nozzle and a vial of blue liquid jutting from the back. More suspiciously, however, was the fact that it was pointed directly at Pinkie Pie.

"Absolute Zero test #1!" Kokonoe Mercury half-yelled, a manic gleam in her eye as she slammed her index finger down on the trigger. An odd blue-and-white mist blasted from the silly looking nozzle, completely enveloping the form of the party mare. Rainbow Dash only just had time to leap back with a yelp of surprise as this happened.

When the sparkling haze vanished, Rainbow saw a disproportionately large chunk of ice, and clearly encased within was Pinkie Pie herself, still grinning wildly. A cold fog rose from the solid block

Kokonoe spun the device around one finger, tossing it casually back into the room. Whatever it crashed into, the woman didn't seem to mind. "That's for getting on my nerves, you peppy little shit!" she growled, before trailing off into a yawn that revealed some teeth that looked much too sharp.

As the scientist made to turn around, she idly brushed a long strand of her hair over her shoulder. Pausing, she fixed a weary eye on the stunned Pegasus. "She'll be out in like... Two, maybe three hours?" Kokonoe shrugged, "Dunno, don't care."

The door swung shut with a resounding clang, and within moments the sound of drills could be heard once more, leaving Rainbow Dash alone with her frozen, still uncannily smiling friend.

The Power of Order: Retconning people from life since 2008

"Eugh. Gag! Fine, go ahead. Try and use your little 'Elements', Frenemies. Just make it quick." The chaotic amalgamation of creatures groaned as a white flash of light consumed his body, teleporting him on top of his black throne perched atop a checkerboard hill.

Twilight fixed the creature with a glare. Discord. The Spirit of Chaos itself. Not satisfied with turning her friends into dark, twisted versions of themselves, he'd also run rampant throughout the town she now called home. Mounds formed from nothing, animals with obscenely stretched limbs running about scared out of their wits, not that anypony could blame them, given that most Ponies in town were also either hiding or sprinting about the place. Luckily, they had a plan.

The Draconequus stared at the strangely silent group of Ponies and quirked an eyebrow, which then proceeded to grow a mouth at one end and then curl around in a circle, eating itself. The fact that they weren't lecturing him about friendship was an immediate red flag. The good old 'vanquishing evil' monologue was a classic! And to not perform it just before he crushed their hopes once more was... Probably heresy, in some parts of the world!

"Well, aren't you going to show me the power of the Azure? Or Friendship, or Geass, or Stand power? Really, you heroes have too many power-gimmicks to keep up with these days." Discord mused, crossing one leg over the over as a mole flew over the gathering, straight into a blue tree.

"None of those things are required to vanquish you, creature of Chaos." A cold voice spoke up from behind the throne.

Discord hummed in glee, eager to see just who the silly Ponies had brought in to defeat him. He smacked the back of his own head, popping both eyes out of their sockets and catching them in his other hand. Almost daintily, he lifted the orbs above the seat of his throne. And then he froze.

Standing at the base of the hill was a figure. A figure that did not resemble a Pony in any way, shape, or form. Clad in pure white and black, the form was tall and intimidating, especially as a large mass of silvery hair danced in the breeze that shouldn't have existed in Discord's world of chaos. Because it wasn't his anymore. Around the creature's boots, and expanding, was a patch of... Grass, and dirt. The world was fixing itself just because of the new arrival's mere presence.

That wasn't the worst of it. Discord would be willing to bet that he was one of the only beings who could possibly see it, but it was still there: surrounding the creature, practically oozing from every part of its being like an aura extending metres from the body. Harmony. Order. The very forces that the Draconequus opposed with quite literally every fibre of his being, and this creature reveled in it, was actually clothed in it.

Then it reached over its back, grasping a cylinder wrapped in black material, a blue gem resting on the top. Except Discord was quick to realise that it was no simple implement. Of course, that became rapidly obvious as the creature pulled a sword as tall as itself in front of it, wreathed in a platinum glow just like the rest of the being. The aura practically dripped from the blade, and just the simple action of moving it in front of the creature's body sent a wave of the power forward, colliding with the side of the unnatural hill. Just like that, the mound shrank rapidly, leaving the black throne hovering in the air as Discord clung to it for dear life, his legs hanging off the edge.

"What's the matter?" The same ice-cold voice resounded through the air, sending chills down the spirit of Chaos' spine, a feeling that even the Elements of Harmony at full power could not instill within him, "Your feet are trembling..."

Discord was, to put it simply, afraid. That alone surprised him, but what shocked him more was the ability to find his own voice through the fear. "Who... Who the heck are you supposed to be? WHAT the heck are you!?"

And though nobody could see it through the plain, featureless white mask, Discord could have sworn the creature was smirking.

"I am the white void..." it intoned, clasping his other hand onto the blade's handle. A slight rumble seemed to run through the very ground, the area of purity expanding.

"I am the cold steel..." another rumble, louder, and everybody could feel the ground shake this time.

"I am the just sword..." and again.

"With blade in hand shall I reap the sins of this world, and cleans it in the fires of destruction!" At this, there was no shake of the ground. But instead, a circle of pure, glowing white shone from below the creature's boot. Some invisible force picked up around him, sending his voluminous hair skywards, nine different strands of hair splaying out in the air behind him.

"I AM HAKUMEN! THE END HAS COME!

In order of appearance:

A Bigger Pony and the Snake

Hazama had just finally been about to make himself comfortable nestling into a corner when the train lurched violently, nearly tipping him flat on his side. Momentarily panicked, his hand clung to his hat while his other stretched out to steady himself. He could have sworn the locomotives back home weren't nearly as violent when they stopped, but then he supposed that most people would be sitting on a seat and not in a completely empty cargo carriage.

The guard, Remix Heart he reminded himself, seemed much more prepared for the stop and barely swayed as they pulled into the station. That, and she was working with four legs and wasn't sitting down. Stupid horses and their slight evolutionary advantage.

At the very least, she seemed to have dried up her waterworks and wasn't even sniffling quietly anymore.

He pushed off of the ground with one hand, rising back up into a sitting position with a muffled grunt of irritation, to which the mare winced and practically leaped forward to support him.

"S-Sorry! I should have been bracing you for that way before we stopped. It was just..." She trailed off, possibly realising that there was no need to explain herself to a mindless animal, before shaking her head and proceeding to help him off the ground.

The chains still irritated Hazama greatly, if only because he never liked walking with his hands behind his back. He much preferred them either on his hat or at his side, thank you very much, but for a multitude of reasons that was blatantly not an option.

Leaning his head to the side, he was able to get a brief look through the tiny slit-like window at the top of the compartment. From what little he had been able to see, the train station appeared to be mostly unguarded save for a pair of identical stallions at either end with no obvious weapons in sight. It was a mostly open-air station, but the structure prevented him from catching a glimpse of the city he had been taken to. Well, presumably it was a city at any rate, though that particular assumption sprung mostly from the fact that Hazama had previously lived in a world where 23 cities were all that remained of Humanity. Or... 22, given that Ikaruga was in a... less than ideal state of existence.

It was much too strange to think about. He never intended on returning home, and nor did he ever plan to discuss his previous life with anyone. Yet it still occurred to him that he would never be able to use any of the vast stores of information he had collected over the years. True, it might make for interesting reading for some scientifically-minded horses if he were to write down facts and figures about Earth, but all of the stock values and criminal connections pertaining to various businesses were now void.

'I suppose,' Hazama thought, absently noting the horse tugging at his chain as he refused to shift from his position, 'That in some ways I actually kind of miss my job. Or... Is it just that it would be preferable to my current situation?' he mused, looking down just as his current keeper moved to tug back with the chain in her mouth. Ever the helpful gentleman, Hazama decided to start moving forward right as she pulled, causing the armoured mare to topple onto the floor with a surprised yelp.

Were the little act of his not as important as it was, he would have been inclined to fix the mare with his most famous sickeningly polite smile. Alas, he had to settle with blinking dumbly at the horse's miffed expression as she shot him her own 'look'.

'It's the small things in life...'

Getting off of the train had been a relatively smooth affair all things considered, though it would likely have been much more crowded had there not been two rows of Royal Guards parading side to side with a Human jutting out in their midst.

That didn't mean there were no whispers, however, and Hazama heard more than a few of the suddenly clothed horses getting uppity for one reason or another.

"What in Equestria did they need to block the station for? A Human?"

"I have a very tight schedule to keep! This is simply outrageous."

If there was one thing that Hazama learned in that moment, it was that rich assholes were the same in any plane of existence. The very moment that someone presumably popular voiced an opinion, the rest of the crowd devolved into mutters of 'indeed' and other such agreements.

He looked over to see who had spoken, but he couldn't discern the original speaker through the sea of monocles, frilly clothing, and utterly inferior hats. Upon that note, he had to repress a particularly derisive snort as he was slowly led through the parting crowd.

Though lacking the know-how concerning how the station usually was, it appeared that he had chosen the wrong day to get 'caught' if the bustling horde was any indication. Horses milled around each other, despite the stifled cries of those who had their ridiculous dresses trampled upon. The scent of perfume and cologne was thick in the air, an almost visible mist surrounding each individual as the Guards tried their best to make their way through to the main street.

It didn't get much better upon making it out. In fact, the situation only seemed to worsen. A huge number of richer-looking folk lined the streets, their eyes seeming to immediately latch on to the new arrival. The raucous bunch seemed to grow a few decibels quieter, before the short moment was immediately shattered by an increase in the previous level of volume. All at once, the small entourage was surrounded on every side, the Guards doing their level best to balance not being overly forceful with them alongside giving him enough breathing room on the offchance he grew violent at the sudden pressure.

He was tired, annoyed, and had things he needed to do with his time other than wading through a waist-high ocean of Ponies. They were right to fear him

His wandering eye picked out the same mare from earlier, Remix Heart, struggling to hold the tide back from surging forward, which confused him momentarily as to why the crowd would be so desperate to get closer. Confused, that is, until he heard what the horses were saying.

"500 Bits for the Human." Said one particularly bored looking stallion, one of his hooves held in the air as a file ran along its edges.

"600!" Shouted another, heard only dimly through the low roar, only for the previous 'gentleman' to frown even deeper than before.

"601."

"650!"

"651."

Hazama fought against the urge to grit his teeth and snarl at the crowd. All of them were calling out numbers of 'Bits' they would offer in exchange for...Him, presumably, though for what he had no idea. He had a vague idea that bits were the currency of the area from casual remarks made by Fluttershy, but he had figured that richer types might use a different system.

Around the very edges of the crowd stood a row of horses with other Humans, which were garbed in various makeshift clothes made out of loose fibers. Stranger still, they all seemed to be comfortable with the crowd, and stood mostly silent. He would have called them more of those Watch-humans like the ones in town if not for the signs around their necks. Numbers appeared to be written on them.

Like that, everything slot into place in Hazama's mind. Nobles and rich fuckers being who they were, there were very few things that would cause them to bundle into a tight crowd the way they were currently doing. One reason that they would ever put up with the 'disrespect' caused by the situation: a chance to show off their money.

This was an auction. A Human auction. That explained the prices being screamed at him from all angles, and the reason that the Guards had all shot each other a worrying look before fixing their facade and stepping off the train with him in tow.

Admittedly he hadn't studied much into the Humans of this planet, but Hazama knew more than enough to figure out that he was a very good specimen by the horses' standards, even if he was lankier than most of the people back on Earth. Add that to the obviously expensive clothes, seemingly immaculate 'hair dye', and put a crowd of aggravatingly rich folk into the mix. You end up with the situation at hand.

The worst part of it all was that he really didn't have any way to solve the problem. If he acted aggressively to scare the horses off then there would be no telling how the Guards would try and restrain him next. Same outcome if he tried to escape. The only option available to him was grinning and bearing it, but without the grinning.

Finally managing to pass off of the main street and into a different road was a relief for the entire party; the group all pausing to compose themselves at the orders of Shining Armour, who seemed to have aged a decade from the experience. It was quite a sight: a squad of Guards all collapsing against a wall and massaging their temples.

Hazama decided to remain standing, fighting back the urge to wander off in a random direction just to annoy them. Not only would it have made them more angry with him than they already were, but he needed to appear as subservient as possible for his plan to work.

"How are you holding up, Boulder? I saw you almost fall over back there."

He slid his gaze to the corner of his vision, where the Captain himself was looking down at the same stallion from before with a wry smirk on his face. The dark green horse raised a hoof in response, showing off something to his superior.

"Got this nasty lil' hit. Probably gonna bruise. My bad, though. Thought Remix had that angle covered."

It was weird to hear the creature talk respectfully after the incident on the train, and the feeling was apparently mutual with the brown mare herself, who had noticeably flinched at his words, eyes locked onto the back of the stallion's head with obvious distaste. She had the decency to look abashed, however, once Captain Armour turned to face her.

"Is this true, Remix Heart?" He asked the mare coldly, officially. His voice lacked any of the camaraderie he had just been directing at the other male, which drew the wary eyes of the rest of the squad that hadn't already been looking their way.

The mare in question didn't know what to say, because the accusation was most definitely true. She had easily spotted the pushy noble trying to shove past the group on his way to his next chance of acquiring a Human, only an idiot would have missed it, and Remix Heart wasn't an idiot. Most of the time. When she had spotted who he would have to go through, however, she decided to veer off to the left, encroaching slightly on another squad-member's area under the pretense of helping them out while Boulder Dash got forcefully bumped into. She hadn't known it would leave a bruise, or that Boulder would have noticed her actions.

"I..." She mumbled, weighing her options. If she said that she was protecting another Guard, that would call into question the aforementioned Guard's abilities to handle his or herself. While the inkling of doubt sown by something like that would not have any openly negative effects, there was always the chance that their supposed lapse in attention would get them denied a promotion over somepony else, for example.

"It's true." Remix Heart conceded, bowing her head to the ground, "I wasn't where I needed to be, and there isn't an excuse for my actions"

"Ok, sure... Just... make sure it doesn't happen again, and all that." Shining Armour rubbed an eye with the back of his hoof, seeming far too fatigued with the day's events to properly reprimand her.

The brown mare blinked, feeling strangely underwhelmed with the lack of punishment. But then, she supposed none of the squad was in very good condition after today. As if dealing with the green haired Human wasn't enough of a problem, the bi-monthly Human auction had been in full swing. It said a lot about Canterlot that despite everypony's individual flaws, they could all come together and... buy pets.

Remix shook her head, deciding to stop attempting to justify the idiocy of the Nobles.

Hazama watched keenly as the Guards all started to move and gather together again, placing their helmets back on their heads. Information was key after all, and even the most minute knowledge of the Royal Guard's operations would likely prove useful for his plans.

He mentally stopped short. Plans? What plans? He didn't have any of those; he'd not yet had to make any. Outside of today's misadventures and the day he'd first arrived on the planet, his life in Equestria had been relatively dull. Or, as dull as entering a new world of talking horses and dumb Humans could be. There was nothing to plan for. As much as he enjoyed inflicting pain upon others, there wasn't any reason for him to do so.

The thought had crossed his mind several times over the course of his stay, but it was extraordinarily liberating to not have any grand, world-threatening schemes on his mind. Nothing that required his constant attention, nobody looking to kill him, and other than needing to act dumb most of the time, he could live peacefully. And that became somewhat dull after a while. It was part of the reason he had decided to fight the Guards in the first place, among...Less than pleasant alternative reasons.

As the herd of Guards started to form their rectangle around him once more, Hazama continued to think; this time about the next move. Obviously he wouldn't be taken to the palace itself, that would present far too much of a risk in the event that he tried to attack the rulers. No, it was much more likely that he was to be taken to a prison cell where the Princesses would judge him 'safely' through bars, or a magic shield, or whatever else they decided to do. In that event, he could potentially still break out and attack whoever he wanted, but there was no reason for them to know that.

'Or,' thought Hazama a short while later, 'They could take me straight to the castle. That is also certainly an option.'

The squad had corralled him down relatively empty roads for several minutes, suddenly glad that the locals were too distracted by the nearby auction to pay any particular attention to one of many impressive looking Humans being walked away from the main street.

Sure enough, they had soon ended up facing the entrance to the palace. Up close, Hazama decided that it was an even more impressive structure than the big crystal tree in Ponyville, though it still paled in comparison to the architecture put into the Hierarchical Cities. He had to admit, however, that where the cities of his home-world were a feat of grand scale and practical design, the two palaces he had seen thus far on this new planet were much more aesthetically pleasing to look at.

Captain Armour took that moment to advance ahead of the group, conversing quickly and quietly with one of two identical stallions parked outside the ornate looking door.

"Alright, we have permission to enter. The Princesses are both waiting inside, so before we go inside... Are we one-hundred percent sure that the Human will not be any threat to them?" Shining Armour asked once the rest of the squad had approached.

Boulder Dash and several other horses that Hazama didn't know the name of stepped closer to him, tugging at the chains around his wrists every which way to make sure he had no reasonable means of escape. The Guards had attempted to place some form of binding magic on him before they had boarded the train, but once more the spells just seemed to fade away as though they were streams of water hitting a steel wall. And that particular phenomenon was not helpful in getting the Guards to trust him, no doubt.

Though he also held the minor suspicion that kicking the shit out of their friend might not have endeared him to them in any way, shape, or form.

"It's as good as we're going to get, Captain." One of the Guards behind him spoke as the impromptu security check came to an end.

Shining Armour seemed to tense up, his hoof pressed against one side of the double doors with his eyes locked on the Human behind him. And then he turned to one of the two stoic stallions to the side.

"You said the Princesses. As in...Plural."

Not even blinking in response to the question, or deigning to look the way of the Captain, the helmeted horse nodded.

"Correct. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are both in attendance."

"That's what I was afraid you'd said..." Shining Armour mumbled, though everybody nearby clearly picked up on it, and mirrored the sentiments if the wave of shudders running through the Guards were any indication.

Hazama inconspicuously raised an eyebrow, as much as he could be as such with a platoon of Guards watching him. Was it the Celestia one they were afraid of, or the Luna one? Because he suspected that the one he was banking on to recognise him happened to be the latter. This whole thing might go to shit if he picked the scary one to rely on.

From what he remembered of her brief stay in his mind, she could be compared to the shitty Vampire Princess from his former home-world in her dialect and attitude. All 'worthless peasant' this and 'please stab me repeatedly because i'm so annoying' that. So very, uncannily similar.

'I think I may have made a big mistake...'

Celestia waited.

It was an activity she'd become practiced at. It was an activity she'd cultivated. It was an activity she'd mastered. It had been tested against Discord. Tested against Twilight's infinite curiosity. But she could never have anticipated the test presented to her on this very day.

The guards in the room shifted in place, waiting for the moment where the silence would be broken by the noise they all anticipated. They had been gathered hurriedly from their patrols around the castle, none of them quite believing the stories regaled to them about this new threat. A Human, supposedly strong enough to brutally take out the entire Pegasus section of a VHRS (Violent Human Retrieval Squad). It was a horrifying thought. What if this new Human wasn't the only one of its kind? What if, lying in wait in the homes of every Human owner in Equestria, was a vicious beast that could kill them if they desired? Thousands of innocent Ponies in danger.

A small amber gemstone lay on a short table at the base of the two thrones, the recording crystal that had witnessed the events they would be judging. The evidence contained within would likely shock everypony in the room.

Princess Luna yawned in a very unprincesslike manner, making every inhabitant of the throne room flinch.

"I do not need to be awake for this, sister."

Celestia's already-straight lips curled downwards imperceptibly as she glanced towards her grumpy sister. Luna was splayed unceremoniously over her throne and her hind legs dangled limply. The tips of her hooves almost touched the floor.

The Princess of the sun was somewhat inclined to agree with her sister, though she'd never give her the satisfaction of knowing so. 'Requesting' her presence was a heat-of-the moment decision that Celestia was coming to regret. At least she had calmed down. The first time she had let out a bellowing sigh, she had unceremoniously catapulted one of her cushions at a night-guard that looked nearly asleep. The exact words were, if Celestia recalled, 'If we cannot rest when we need to, then thou most certainly shan't!'

The elder Princess opened her mouth to console Luna for the umpteenth time that hour, only to be interrupted by one of the Guards by the door sending her a small twitch of the head that could, through some microscope or another, be construed as an affirmative nod. She returned the gesture. Closing her mouth and straightening her posture, Celestia was sure to clear her throat in her sister's direction, causing the tired mare to jolt upright into a sitting position.

It was as though the air in the room grew colder; every one of the guards lining the walls seemed to tense up, gripping their spears tightly even though they were more for ceremony than anything else. They hadn't been given any information on what they were dealing with, other than the fact that it was a Human, and it was powerful enough to face a full VHRS. As the heavy double-doors swung open with a groan that pierced the suddenly oppressive silence, a collective breath was taken.

Luna had been watching intently until the door had opened, flooding the room with light enough to make her sleep-deprived eyes clench shut. She could have sworn she also heard her sister chuckle under her breath when she recoiled away with a hiss. Blinking away the spots in her vision, she tried her best to make out the shapes coming through the door.

At the head of the group was clearly Prince Shining Armour judging by the shape of the helmet. That was good. If he was fine enough to walk and lead, then Cadance would have no reason to come complaining to them. And in the name of her sister, that mare could complain when it suited her.

Her vision was growing slightly better, and the group was edging closer with the slow, dull pace seemingly required when anything was done in front of her and her sister. Other Ponies, noticeably less than there should have been. All thanks to the creature in the middle.

Luna tried to make out the figure in the center of the party, but could only see that the supposed Human had an oddly shaped head, wider at the top like someone stuck a circle around it.

The doors at the end of the room swung shut.

Her vision cleared.

It was definitely a Human in front of her. The odd shape turned out to be...A hat. Stranger still was the Human attached to it. Memories of a few weeks ago. A strange dream. A talking Human. A talking Human that had kicked her out of her own domain.

She really couldn't help the indignant growl that tore itself from her throat, nor could she control its volume.

Every eye in the room was suddenly upon her. Some were wide with shock, some were wide with fear. Others with confusion, namely her sister. Luna didn't care. Her gaze was focused solely on the being at the foot of her throne.

Hazama, for his part, wished he could move his arms and grab hold his hat as the angry horse stared down at him in anger.

'A big mistake indeed...'

Author's Note

OH YEAH THIS IS A THING I'M MEANT TO BE DOING.

So it's been a while, no doubt about that. This chapter was just...Ugh, it'll probably go down as one of the hardest for me to write. You might ask why that is, and to that i'll say this chapter was rewritten twice before events played out like they did in the version you're seeing now.

The first draft focused almost entirely on the train and getting out of it, which is ridiculously bad pacing when the last TWO chapters have been mostly about the train.

The second draft, I decided to see if it was easier to write about the characters in Ponyville while all this went on. It wasn't. Outside of coming up with excuses for the mane six to talk to each other, I realised that all their conversations focused on Hazama. And let me just say, I do not want to be the kind of story where every other character's conversation or day needs to revolve around the protagonist.

With that contrived mess getting deleted, I lost the urge to write this chapter again. If any of you have ever played or watched the game 'Getting Over It' with Bennett Foddy, i'll tell you now that he's absolutely right. Starting over is much harder than doing something for the first time.

Funnily enough, I started writing again once I realised I was looking at other fanfictions I follow and silently begging for the author to update. I kid you not, one of my thoughts was "your story only has 6k word chapters and it's been a month!"

Needless to say, the moment I realised I was doing the same thing with even less of a word count average spurred me into action again.

Even then i think this chapter could have been more interesting, but whatever. It's done, thank God.

It's the miscellanious/music/useless corner once again. I'm bored with this chapter and just want it out at this point. Have Azrael's theme. Enjoy. Or don't, that's your pregorative.

The End. And the Beginning.

Dim lights blinked at her from the other side of the laboratory, drawing her ever-watchful eye from the screen of jagged lines and other blinking lights. This incidentally inspired the hunched over pink-haired woman to close and reopen her own eyes, the bags beneath them betraying her fatigue.

Kokonoe Mercury was not happy. This wasn't at all a strange turn of events but today, at this particular minute, the scientist was at her wit's end. Between that creepy looking girl from earlier and Rachel getting herself turned into a distraction for Ragna, she didn't have much time left until the Embryo was done processing, and would swallow up all the Qualified that hadn't come close enough to the end to matter. Herself included.

But despite her already bleak outlook, the light on the console gave her information that only made it so much worse for everyone involved. Ever since the Continuum Shift event, Kokonoe had gotten a lock on the presence of Terumi's power. Not enough to pinpoint his exact location at any given time, but just enough to serve as a proximity detector.

Since Terumi had been separated from his chosen vessel Hazama by the Embryo's Phenomenon Intervention, the signal had grown fainter, split between the two beings. And now one of them had dropped off the radar entirely. Which shouldn't have been possible, not with how space inside the Embryo functioned. So either Hazama was dead, or had gone somewhere that she couldn't possibly detect him.

Her lip curved even further downward as she bit down on the lollipop stick in her mouth, snapping it in two. Her finger almost slammed down onto the communicator switch.

Across the world, a mechanical trill played in the ear of Kokonoe's personal Prime Field Device, Lambda-11. She had to admit a certain fondness for the machine, though she would never, ever voice the thought out loud. Her existence, or subsequent lack thereof, was the sole reason that Terumi hadn't doomed them all at the climax of the Continuum Shift. And yet again, the machine proved infinitely useful as a sort of communication node between the scientist and her... companions.

"Lambda. Get Ragna on the line. Right. Now." Kokonoe hissed, catlike eyes narrowing behind horizontal oval glasses.

The mechanical girl herself didn't respond, but another noise played through the speaker on Kokonoe's desk, informing her and the recipient of the message of the link.

"Ragna, what the FUCK just happened?! Where's Hazama?!"

The man on the other end winced as the message was literally shouted into his mind. Taking the time to make sure that the woman at his feet was stable and breathing, he brushed himself off with a sigh and stood up.

"Bastard lost. And he...He just jumped! Right into the Sheol Gate! It's alright though, Rachel's safe, for now-"

"I don't give a shit about Rachel right now, idiot! What the hell was Hazama saying when he jumped? Where's he gone!?"

"Hey how the hell should I know? You're the one who knows everything, you figure it out!"

At that moment, a voice spoke up through the connection. Weak, and shaky, but there.

"H-Hmph. It's always gratifying to know that you regard me so highly, Kokonoe. And you know as well as I do that if Hazama has fallen into the- no, fool, i'm perfectly capable of standing on my own," she shot, waving a hand at the man that had all but rushed to her side upon her attempt to get up, "But yes. At any rate, he is well and truly lost to us now. We should resolve to proceed with the plan as we laid it out. Whatever the Boundary deigns to do with him, it's out of our control now. More importantly... Ragna, you idiot. Why would you waste valuable time that we absolutely cannot spare trying to help me?"

The Grim Reaper in question gave a particularly indignant splutter and started forward in surprise. "W-What? Are ya really gonna do the whole 'ungrateful bitch' thing right now?"

"My, as vulgar as usual."

And just as Ragna began sounding more and more like a dying cat out of frustration, Kokonoe quite literally tuned them out, switching off the connection. She leaned back in her seat, sliding a lollipop from the tray to her side and unwrapping it at the same time in one practiced movement. As the familiar rush of energy seeped through her tired limbs, the Beastkin's mind focused on the missing man.

Hazama... As much as he was the forefront of a large portion of her problems, a very significant portion of the blame belonged to the marginally more sinister Terumi. Wherever the wielder of Ouroboros ended up after his jaunt through the Boundary, the ghost of the ex-Six Heroes member would no longer be able to reach him. For the sake of whatever existed at the other end of his trip, Kokonoe could only hope that he would be somewhat more manageable without Terumi's influence.

At the thought of the Nox Nyctores held by the man now completely lost to them, the scientist exhaled through her nose in what her cyborg underling Tager referred to as 'Stage two on the Kokonoe amusement scale'. Stage one inferred no reaction at all, and stage four was full-on maniacal cackling. The scale's existence, incidentally, registered a negative-one: a glare at the source of the scale with half-lidded eyes and a deepening of her usual frown. The list had proved much too accurate, however, and so it was allowed for use by Tager and Tager alone. And only if nobody else was in the room. Or within a mile of her.

In any event, the source of her dry amusement came from the loss of the snake-chain Causality Weapon. It meant that even if Relius were to recover the remnants of her mother's attempt at a new master unit, he would forever lack one of the nine components needed to power it. Small victories.

That was the last time that Hazama ever truly dwelled on her consciousness. No use thinking about a person you'd never for the rest of your life have to worry about ever again, after all.

Perhaps throwing himself into the Boundary out of spite wasn't quite the best idea that had ever crossed his mind, Hazama wondered to himself as he floated, weightless in a realm of impenetrable darkness. Impenetrable, that is, except for the streaks of bright blue and orange that shot past from behind him, streaking off into the black and leaving him alone until another passed. Two hundred and thirty one blue bolts had gone past, and two hundred-ish orange ones had done the same. Since he'd started counting, that is.

It wasn't always like this, it had to be said. Tossing himself into the Sheol Gate, he'd experienced blasts of pure, violent colour for the first several hours, until eventually they'd peter off into the tiny whispers of light that kept him company now.

Odd how he missed having people around now that he was truly alone for the first time in quite literally forever.

Ever since he was old enough to think a sentence coherently, he knew that Terumi's influence had been there. Whispering things. Nudging him along to the path required in order for him to become nothing more than a vessel for the mad spirit.

He'd played along at first. Rising up the ranks of the NOL quickly to fit his needs. Not overly fast so as to draw attention to himself, and not slow enough to make him seem like one who took far too long to get things done. The perfect balance.

And then he'd gotten drawn into the fucking time loop. As Terumi's presence grew stronger with each turn of fate's wheel, he felt his control slipping further from his grasp each passing moment, forced to watch the massive bundle of idiocy known as Ragna fumble time and time again.

As if that wasn't emasculating enough for the perpetually angry bastard, he had to be saved by a girl so pathetic that without her guns she'd literally curl into a ball and cry her eyes out. If Hazama still had his motor functions, he'd have rolled his eyes. Funny how the Vermillion girl turned out to be so important. He missed the days where he could casually insult her in passing and not have the threat of a Godslaying Sword at his throat.

The Calamity Trigger breaking the loop had its own problems, of course. His biggest part to play came soon after, leading the 'heroes' of the world on a merry chase, and ensuring that, for one tiny, tiny fraction of a moment...That the Takamagahara system was distracted, allowing Terumi to infiltrate and ruin the whole thing. Sure, he hadn't expected to be able to do it as he'd been handily wrecking Ragna until he'd pulled some IDEA Engine or whatever out of the Murakumo unit that'd somehow appeared on the Altar.It might have been utter bullshit, but it served his purpose well enough. Gee, even the thought of it made his wound started hurting again.

Wait. What? Pain? Physical sensation? He made to twitch his index finger and, sure enough, motion returned to him. His amber, serpentine eyes roved the darkness as his hand flew up to its usual place, clutching at the top of his hat.

Suddenly, lightning bolts of colour blasted up from below. A few even passed through his body, filling him with intense warmth for a brief moment before vanishing. More and more streaks of light appeared, faster and faster. A whole spectrum blasting towards him. If the light coming from behind him meant he was leaving an area, then did the fact that they now came from in front mean that he was approaching somewhere instead? He doubted it would be back home. Even though time was screwy at best in the Boundary, he'd been travelling way too long to just appear back on the doorstep of Kagutsuchi.

For the first time in days of aimless meandering, Hazama's signature smirk lit up his expression just as the slight tug of gravity started to take hold.

The tornado of light swirling around him spun ever quicker until they blurred into a mess of bright white. Heat, chill, bright, dark, up, down, all of it encompassed his being, closing in until it felt as though he was wrapped in it, bound in a straitjacket of sensation.

As he watched, the spinning slowed. Incrementally, like turning off a CD player and watching the disk slowly lose energy until coming to a halt.

Eventually, the cyclone started to expand outwards, the layers of light getting caught at different distances as though it were wallpaper catching on objects. A lot of green made itself evident, and a fair amount of brown, too. It wasn't long before he could make out distinct shapes. Mounds, hills, trees...

His grin never wavered until the moment that gravity returned to him in full force, his legs suddenly having to bear weight after such a long period of weightlessness. Needless to say, the wind was knocked straight from his lungs as he collapsed to the floor, panting heavily on his knees.

He spent what felt like an hour just resting there, basking in the simple, underrated pleasure of existing. Of being a recognised concept. Of feeling the slight breeze against his skin and the weight of his body against the floor. The floor!

The floor. Grassy. Earthy. Dirty. Ew, no. Absolutely not. He wouldn't let his suit get ruined in the first minute of his presence in this new world. For he knew without a doubt that it was a new world. The air was clean. Clean! Imagine that. Not even a single trace of seithr entered his lungs as he sucked in greedy breaths of air.

Scrambling to his feet to avoid getting any dirt stuck to his slacks, it was with shaky fingers that he removed his trademark fedora and tilted his head back. He let out a burst of air in a genuinely pleased laugh. An odd thought, to be frank. He hadn't had any reason to laugh, really laugh, in... Hm. That was rather sad, actually.

But it didn't matter. It didn't matter if he never laughed before, but he could and did so now. It didn't matter if he was the only living thing on this new planet. It. Didn't. matter. There would be no Terumi dictating his life's course. No Master Unit, no Takamagahara. Nothing to bind him to a single, morbid fate with no possible escape.

For the first time in his many entire lives, Hazama could live.

Author's Note

Hello to anyone who happens to read this.

If you both happen to recognise me and/or have read my other story, then I would imagine some readers may be curious as to why that hasn't recieved an update in what is frankly far too long.

Long story short, I got bored. And College started. And I forgot. But then the idea for this story got into my head and I feel bad for essentially abandoning Pinkie's Kooky Quest. I can't promise i'll update it soon, but I imagine an update will come at some point.

As for this story, yeah. BlazBlue. Good game. Sunk a lot of hours into it, and am continuing to do so.

The Boundary being what it is, I always wondered what could have happened to him after the events of Centralfiction. So...This, essentially.

I can only hope that I don't get burnt out on this one as well.

EDIT 13/11/17: Lmao I look at my second paragraph and just think that anyone not in the know about BlazBlue's already pretty ridiculous lore must be super confused at all the lore Keywords I drop.

Giving your Snake some exercise.

‘Is that how people get rejected on this planet?’ Hazama mused the two second-ugliest things he’d ever seen started to shamble towards him, picking up speed slowly, ‘How very harsh’. As frankly disgusting as they were, the mass of insect-ridden goo known as Arakune was a hard act to follow.

The black patches caused by whatever ‘infection’ these Humans apparently had made them look like corpses with rotting flesh, eyes even more dull and lifeless than the other people on this planet.

Speaking of the infection, what the fuck? What kind of infection could make something look and act like this? It was like something out of a cheap zombie flick, except unfortunately real and thrice as disgusting to be in the presence of.

Were they hostile? Most likely. The Ponies wouldn’t have completely abandoned the town if they posed no threat at all. And there was something in their gaze that set off some warning signs in the back of his head. The way they moved, and that godforsaken moaning…

Was this disease curable? This was a very important question to have answered, but he sincerely hoped not. If it could be reversed, then it wouldn’t paint him in a good light to slaughter them both, which was well within his capabilities. Don’t want some angry horses shouting at you for killing their pet or whatever, even if they were mindless piles of dead skin at the time.

Then again… If he was just a ‘Human’, then he wouldn’t know any better? Self-defence, right? Nobody could fault him for that. He’d have to refrain from using Ouroboros, however, as the wounds wouldn’t match up to what a Human of this world could do. That went for his knives, too.

Hazama’s lips curled upwards. Self-handicaps were ever so much fun, and he imagined the more mundane method of fighting would come in handy for his guise.

These thoughts took place in the span of about ten seconds, and by this time the infected Humans had come within five meters of him. Where some animals would have stopped warily at this point, these people sped up.

A harsh, otherworldly shriek pierced the air, their jaws hanging wide and unhinged, though not in the intentional way that some reptiles would. Instead, they seemed to be wounded already, chunks of bone jutting out from pus-oozing lacerations. The noise made Hazama cringe, even as he watched one of the two drop down to all fours, starting to run like a Dog would.

He waited in place, hands behind his back as the more animalistic one sprinted past his friend and seemed to slow for the briefest moment. Its knees bent back, dropping into something similar to a proper race-ready pose. It screeched that awful sound again just as it released all the tension in its legs, lunging forwards at a speed completely unprecedented of something that seemed to have issues standing just a moment ago.

Confident that he was alone and free to act however he wanted within reason, Hazama allowed a full sadistic smirk to spread across his lips, amber eyes narrowing. One hand strayed from his back to rest on his hat, tilting it downwards slightly over his face.

Turning his body sideways, he brought his right leg into the air at incredible speed, crashing into the already shattered jaw of the pouncing Human with a sickening crunching sound. While the signature green-and-black energy pillar of the Serpent’s Infernal Rapture did not appear, the impact of the strike was more than enough to send the attacker flying into the air, the lower half of its jaw sent spiralling in a different direction.

He took a moment to agonise over the blood and…other unidentified fluids on his shoe before moving into action again.

The infected Human still sprinting on two legs hadn’t paused for a moment at the complete loss of his companion, but now had its hand outstretched as it came closer.

This one was larger than the other, lither Human, but not by much. It was tall and bulky, though its skin and bone had atrophied somewhat from whatever disease plagued them.

Nevertheless, Hazama easily leaned backwards from the horizontal swipe at his torso, and used the momentum gathered by coming forward again to leap off the ground, his knee planting itself directly in the Human’s neck.

It made a sound eerily similar to choking as it slid back along the dirt, already preparing to swing again. The strike hadn’t been enough to put it down, but that was never Hazama’s intention.

A green circle appeared behind him, with three smaller circles floating around it. From out of nowhere, a metallic object similar to a snake’s head shot forth, attached to an almost solid black chain that was outlined in luminous green. It came to an abrupt halt an instant later, hanging in mid-air with absolutely no momentum.

Hazama’s grin widened as he allowed Ouroboros to pull him backwards, effortlessly avoiding the retaliation blow that had been attempted. While he wouldn’t allow himself to use it for injuring the Humans due to possible aroused suspicions, it was a different matter entirely to use it for mobility.

The Human, not expecting his target to defy simple logic with its movement, had overcompensated with his swing. It was leaning too far forward, having intended to gore its target on its claws.

Hazama looked to the right, and saw exactly the shadow he wanted to see. He turned back to the Human that appeared to be falling over in slow-motion.

With extraordinary speed, Ouroboros shot over the Human’s head, freezing in mid-air once again as Hazama flew forward and upwards.

When he was directly above the musclebound zombie, he shot another chain downwards, dragging himself down to the floor, kicking up dust as he landed.

His eyes shining with glee, Hazama grabbed the back of the Human’s neck with one hand, clenching with a grip of a strength unexpected by a being of his size. He lifted upwards, letting go and twisting his body 180 degrees at the same time, jutting his leg forward. In doing so, he propelled the Human towards the shadowy spot on the floor.

A single second passed, and the other Human came crashing down from the sky, landing on top of the bulkier Human in a heap.

This had all taken place in the span of a few seconds. It was a good thing he hadn’t used the proper version of Serpent’s Infernal Rapture, else the first Human might never have come down at all.

‘Time for the finishing touch...’ He mused, hands slipping into his pockets as he stepped towards the bodies, bones too broken to try anything funny.

These Humans seemed to be fairly strong for what were essentially wild animals, and Hazama himself didn’t look nearly strong enough or (he hoped) smart enough to fight them off. Therefore, he had to make it look like an accident had taken them out of the battle.

His eyes flickered to the abandoned market, focusing in on the stall he’d taken the apple from before.

‘Well, it can’t be helped. Requisition in times of duress, and all that~!’ Hazama chuckled to himself as he sauntered behind the stand. Taking care to put the basket of apples on the ground, not before taking one for himself again, he then used one hand to tip the wooden structure forward. ‘Thank you so very much for playing, but now I bid you adieu!’

The last echoes of disgusting moaning were silenced as the fairly heavy stall fell atop the two Humans, crushing them against themselves and the dirt.

Silence reigned until Hazama decided to take a bite out of the apple in his other hand, marvelling at the taste somewhat. He only slightly regretted ruining the stall that sold them.

But now he didn’t quite know what to do. The threat was dealt with, but how were any of the Ponies to know that? How would they come back? And for that matter, why had he been abandoned by the horses helping him?!

He wasn’t actually angry over that in any way as it had allowed him a workout. Not a particularly exciting workout, but he’d take what he could get.

His eyes scanned the broken corpses before him, and particularly at the blood the spattered the ground, tainted with pools of black.

His chewing slowed as he looked down to the shoe he’d kicked the first Human with.

It wasn’t overly ruined, to his relief, but there were red splotches sprinkled over them. This wasn’t so bad for the plain black areas, but the white patches at the toes were an issue.

‘If that shit stains, I’m going to be very disappointed.’ He thought, taking another bite from his appropriated apple.

He spent a minute or so savouring the fruit, until it too was done. He tossed it into the same bush as before on his way past, figuring that he may as well go explore the place, as it didn’t seem that the town’s residents would get the memo anytime soon, and would likely take forever to return.

Hands firmly in his pockets again, he took a moment to reassert his dull, lifeless disguise, flattening out his lips and removing the enjoyment from his eyes as he turned to look for the first place he should go.

Then he had to look up. And up. And up some more, until he finally saw the top of the giant crystal structure placed directly in the centre of the town.

…

…

‘How’d I miss that on the way here?’ He blinked owlishly, staring at the overly intricate patterns that adorned the…Tree? Palace? Just what the hell was it, anyway?

Seriously, how did he completely miss something like that?

Yes, it had been very misty earlier in the day, but there’s no way a giant, shiny crystal what-ever-this-was could have been concealed that easily!

It did, however, give Hazama an inkling as to where the townsfolk were, especially if the large, ornate doors were any indication. If they were as thick as they looked, it would be hard work for even the more muscular of the two infected Humans to damage. The people/Ponies must have gathered inside as protection. Safety in numbers and safety in giant-crystal-whatever-this-was. Made sense.

Shrugging to himself, he made his way down the path and headed to the building.

“Everypony! Everypony please, calm down! Everything is going to be fine!”

Twilight spoke large, grand words, but sounded less than convincing given that she herself was massively on edge.

The crowd in the throne room had huddled into small friend and acquaintance groups, fearfully discussing the damage that would be done by the Humans before they’d be apprehended and dealt with.

The flower sisters were the worst offenders, as usual. Standing on some boxes as some kind of soapbox, they’d been essentially heralding the end-times of the world. Everypony had been utterly ignoring the trio, used to their shenanigans by now, but a small group of Humans, some of average age and others just children, had gathered to listen in apparent unblinking awe.

Other Humans were with their owners, sitting by their hooves, occasionally growling at the door as they seemed to vaguely understand what was happening, in the same way that any other animal could understand a Pony’s fear.

In essence, Twilight was being completely ignored, everypony else too absorbed in their own matters to listen. Probably just as well, she wasn’t good at making inspiring speeches. That was a duty better left to any of the other princesses.

It’s not like they needed to listen either way. She’d placed heavy defences on the door once she had been sure everypony was inside, and wasn’t that a chore and a half? Some Ponies were occupied when the bell had rung and the call had come to get to safety in the palace.

Baths were left to cool, stalls were abandoned with baskets full of produce, playground toys were left on the spot, and three of the Ponies that Twilight cared most about were still missing.

She had agonised over the decision to close the door when Rarity, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash were still missing, but she knew that the latter was in no danger due to her flight abilities, and the former two were together having brunch as far as her knowledge went. They’d heard the warnings, she hoped.

So the entrance had been swung shut, locked, and sealed with several layers of magical defences designed to react to touch. Ponies knew not to touch the doors when they were closed in times of crises such as this. If somepony was still stranded outside, then Twilight’s heart went out to them, but unless she was alerted to their presence and could teleport out and retrieve them, then they were on their own.

The panicking had gone down significantly since everypony had first gotten to safety, but it had been half an hour now, and no response from the Royal Guard yet. It would take at least twenty minutes from first call to get a message to Canterlot , and another thirty to get a platoon of battlemages and Pegasi to arrive.

Normally she would likely be able to deal with such a threat herself, but this was on a whole other scale.

The infection had reached Applejack’s Human stables. Who knew how many had been infected before the farm mare had managed to corral the remaining ones away and into the castle?

By her friend’s count, she’d only lost seven total to the infection as she’d luckily been doing her rounds of the stables when it had hit. But that wasn’t a definite, even if Bic Mac had barricaded five of them in the barn. The other two had escaped to town, but luckily the call had long since gone out of the impending danger.

Almost everypony’s head suddenly whipped around at once as the familiar sound of several lightning bolt striking something echoed through the room, dulling all conversation to a quiet murmur.

Twilight took the opportunity to stand, relieved that the door’s magical defences had worked as intended.

“Please don’t worry, everypony! That was the lightning trap that I set going off! Please back away from the door. We need to seal the infected Human properly until the Guard arrives!”

Everypony did as asked, squishing further into the already cramped throne room as their Princess flew to the front of the crowd.

Applejack emerged to her left, having waited by the door as the Pony with one of the biggest personal stakes in the outbreak.

“Sugarcube… Ya think it worked? D’ya reckon they’re still awake and swingin’?” the mare drawled, accent currently thicker than usual as a testament to her panic.

Twilight didn’t think there was any way that the Humans were still conscious out there, but both Ponies held an ear out regardless. No noise, just the slight crackle in the air that came after lightning had struck.

She shrugged.

“I think so, Applejack. I’m about to open the door, you get ready with the rope, ok?” she asked, to which her friend nodded, lifting a spool of thick rope that was already getting its end tied into a lasso.

Once the mare had finished her work, she nodded meaningfully at Twilight, who nodded back.

“On three.”

“Got it.”

“One!” Twilight called out, loud and clear to ensure that everypony else in the room knew what was going on. No sense in anypony being within the range of danger in the very slight chance that the Humans were still awake.

“Two…” Applejack started to twirl the lasso in her hooves, ready to restrain her Humans

“Three!” Twilight all but shouted, her magic wrenching the doors wide apart.

A very confused and slightly singed Hazama was promptly draped in rope, blinking at the mass of staring Ponies.

Author's Note

So that was a fun chapter, I would say. A little bit of fighting, nowhere near the extent of what Hazama can do, but still neat.

I'd also like to say a big thank you for everyone who's liked and favourited the story thus far! It's garnered more support than I ever expected.

And four unexplained dislikes, which as far as i'm concerned are the mark of any halfway decent story.

I don't actually know if favourites mean all that much, here, but i'll take what I get!

I've actually run out of Hazama's personal themes now, believe it or not, but I do have the theme that plays when he fights his main rival and the protagonist of BlazBlue, Ragna. It also happens to be my second favourite of three three themes i've shown thus far.

So here it is: Nightmare Fiction!