Entering Sugarcube Corner was like walking into a blizzard of flour, sugar, and other baking ingredients. Twilight, as she stepped inside, blinked like someone bad at metaphors. "...Pinkie?" she asked uncertainly. "What's going on in here?"

Pinkie popped up from behind the counter, holding a cupcake striped with white and green. "I'm experimenting with cupcake flavors that match each pony in Ponyville!"

"That's... kind of creepy, Pinkie."

"Not for their birthday, it's not!" she countered, hopping over to Twilight. "I often make cakes colored like each pony. This is just matching flavors to colors! Like, Rainbow is a bunch of fruit, and Rarity would be lavender and vanilla, and you're blackberry."

"Blackberry?"

"Surprisingly purple, given its name and all!" Pinkie giggled.

Twilight blinked several times, then decided to just roll with it. "So who is that cupcake for?"

"Lyra. Mint-vanilla! It's pretty good, but I think it needs chocolate chips. What do you think?" She passed the green and silver-white cupcake to Twilight, who took a bite.

Used to giving feedback on Pinkie's experimental recipes, Twilight pondered the blend of flavors. "Hmm... Yeah, I think chocolate would be good here. But chocolate chips would mess up the color scheme... what if it was filled with chocolate inside, like a lava cake?"

Pinkie gasped. "Twilight, that's it! You're a genius!"

"I try," Twilight agreed modestly, as Pinkie raced off to the kitchen again. But this treat had gotten her thinking. "Hey, PInkie?"

"Uh-huh?"

"What's up with Lyra, anyway?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've heard she's obsessed with these mythical 'humans'. She even sits like one!"

"No no no, you've got this all wrong. It's Bon Bon who's obsessed with humans!" Pinkie said, shoving a vanilla cupcake with swirled strawberry and blueberry icing at her.

Twilight took it uncertainly. "Are you sure? But everypony says-"

Suddenly, Pinkie was right in front of her muzzle, wearing her Most Serious Face. "The last time 'everypony said' was Zecora, and everypony was wrong. Including me. And I know about everypony in this town."

Twilight slid backwards. "Okay, I believe you."

"Good."

"But then, why does Lyra always sit like a human?" Twilight took a bit of the cupcake. "Ooh, that's a good flavor combination."

"Thanks! And Lyra sits that way because Bon Bon likes it. She's just making her friend happy."

"Friend? I thought they were more than that."

Pinkie shrugged. "Again, what everypony says can be wrong. All I know on this one is that the town has a betting pool on when they're going to come out."

Twilight tossed the empty cupcake wrapper into a conveniently-placed trash can. "What are you betting for?"

"My bet's placed on them actually being just friends. There's no real reason to think otherwise. Ponies are making a big deal about nothing. Sure, they might be in love, but they might not be! We can't really tell."

"Huh." Twilight stared off into space thoughtfully. "Um... Is that the only relationship betting pool in Ponyville?"

"Not at all! There's one for everypony, I think, but the ones about us are the most popular."

"Us, like, you and me?" Twilight asked, eyes wide.

"Well, I meant our entire friend group, but yeah, you and I are pretty popular to bet on."

Hesitantly. "Are you talking about us separately... or as a couple?"

"Both!"

"WHAT?"

"The shipping between different members of our friend group is intense. I know at least one pony who believes in each possible pairing between the six of us."

"But- but-"

"There's also a large group of ponies who ship you with Tempest Shadow, for some reason."

"WHAT?"

"I know, right?" Pinkie shrugged. "But they have fun with it, so I let them."

"But any pairing within the group... it would completely change the dynamic! Totally mess it up!"

"I know. Plus there's the issue of whether the Elements of Harmony would even work, if some of us were more than friends."

Twilight's eyes went, if possible, even wider. "I'd never even thought of that!"

"Few ponies do."

With a kind of morbid curiosity, Twilight asked, "Which pairs are most popular to bet on?"

"Applejack and Rarity. Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. Applejack and Rainbow Dash."

"But- but none of those would ever work out! They're too different!"

"They're not too different to be friends," Pinkie reminded her.

"Sure, but..." She paused, trying to put it into words. "I think the very same things that make their friendship strong would make a relationship difficult."

"How so?"

"Well... take you and me for an example."

"Almost nopony ships us, but okay."

Twilight took a breath, forming her thoughts carefully before expressing them. "When I'm around you, I feel a little less... I don't know, uptight. And I think I calm you down, as well."

"I think you do," Pinkie agreed. "I'm still, you know, me, but I'm wayyy better at holding calm, logical conversations with you than with, say, Rainbow Dash."

"Yes! You put exactly what I was looking for into words. You're a genius!"

"Well, duh."

"You're still you," Twilight continued, ignoring this. "And I'm still me, even if I'm a little less worried about schedules and neatness. I mean, look around this place!" Pinkie did, and started giggling at how much of a mess it was. Twilight giggled, too, then kept talking. "If this was in my castle, I'd have a seizure! But out here, with you around, it doesn't seem so bad."

"I see what you're getting at... but I don't."

Twilight nodded. "Well, now imagine if we were in a relationship. Suddenly we're having more influence on each other. We're affecting each other more. And then I start feeling like you're trying to drive me towards the brink of insanity with your nonsense..."

"...and I feel like you're trying to keep me too restrained and not let me have fun!" Pinkie added.

"Everything would be different, and the effect we have on each other would start to get way too much!" Twilight finished.

"I think I see. And for most of the others, it's the same... but what about Rainbow Dash and Applejack? They're pretty similar."

"Yeah, but their similarity is competitiveness. They'd drive each other up the wall!"

"I guess you're right. Still, it's not like those ponies are doing any harm. They're not forcing us to get together with each other, only speculating."

Twilight shrugged. "I suppose. I'm not going to stop them. I can still be annoyed at them, though."

Pinkie Pie laughed. "Hey, want a Friendship Pack for the road?"

"What's that?"

She pulled out a box of cupcakes. "One of each of our cupcakes! Lemon and strawberry for Fluttershy, vanilla and blackberry for Rarity, apple (what else?) for Applejack, and you already know the others!"

Twilight passed her a few bits. "Sounds delicious."

Author's Note

I try to avoid turning my characters into a soapbox, but this is something that really bugs me, and I wanted to mention it. This also went on quite the tangent, but the original idea was from Viper Pit.
Takes place in an alternate world where EQG never happened, thus Twilight still considers humans mythical.