It was a stormy night in Ponyville. Twilight Sparkle was reading in her castle. “Ah nothing like a good book after a long day”. She had been busy preparing for the Equestria Pony Summit coming up in a few weeks. She looked out the window. “Wow it’s still coming down out there! What time is it… 8:00PM.” She lit her horn and levitated the book back to its place on the shelf.
She started trotting out of the room. “Maybe I should call it a night soon”, she said as she went by the front door. She heard knocking. “That’s weird. Who would be here at this hour and in storm no less?”
The alicorn flew to the door. The knocking continued. “I’m coming! Keep your horseshoes on!” When she opened the door, she heard somepony sobbing slightly. She then threw the door open worried about whoever it may be.
When the doors where fully open, she saw who the pony was, one of her old friends from Canterlot, Lemon Hearts to be exact. Twilight smiled but it fell when she realized Lemon was crying. “Lemon Hearts what’s wrong?! P-please come in its pouring out!”, Twilight offered. “Why am I surprised I heard her sobbing but why is she crying? I’ll ask her”.
Lemon Hearts entered just saying in a quiet sad tone, “T-thank y-you Twilight.”
The two mares walked into the castle’s living room. Twilight used her magic to light a fire. After it was fully lit, she turned to her friend. “Can I get you anything, some oats, tea, maybe some hot cocoa?”
Lemon rubbed her eyes that were now red and puffy from her crying so much. “Some hot cocoa please.”
Twilight nodded, “Ok, do you want any marshmallows, whipped cream or anything?”
Lemon replied, “Marshmallows and cream please.” Twilight just nodded and left to prepare two cups of cocoa. “Autumn” Lemon thought in a very sad tone.
A few minutes later Twilight came back with two mugs, one of them with some swirled whipped cream. “Ok, Lemon I’ve been avoiding the question but why were you crying?” Lemon took one of the mugs without another word but Twilight was persistent. “Please Lemon, you can talk to me about anything. We’re friends remember.”
“Ok, I’ll talk *deep sigh*. I came here to visit Autumn. You remember him, right?” Twilight knew the stallion she was talking about. He and Lemon Hearts had been dating for a while. She nodded. “We broke up!”, Lemon Heart replied.
Twilight’s eyes widened. “What?! Why, what happened?”
Lemon tried her best not to cry but with what she was about to say she broke down. “He, he CHEATED ON ME!” Without thinking Lemon practically dove into Twilight, crying loudly into her chest. Twilight didn’t mind though and wrapped her hooves around her friend.
“Autumn Leaf when I get my hooves on you, you’ll be very VERY sorry”, Twilight thought angrily. She looked down at Lemon who was sobbing loudly onto her. “There, there it’s ok”, Twilight murmured as soothingly as she could. After what seemed like hours to both mares, Lemon calmed down.
Lemon was still crying but not as much as before. “I can’t believe it. I thought he loved me!”
As Lemon slipped out of her embrace Twilight replied, “I know but talking more about it will help”. Lemon sighed “Ya, you’re right. Ok here’s what happened. I had just gotten to Ponyville”…
Earlier that evening
“Everypony off for Ponyville!” the Train Conductor shouted.
Lemon stepped off the train. “Ah now for a good week off in Ponyville”, Lemon said stretching. “Even if it’s going to rain and from what I understand it looks like it will be soon too”. As she walked through Ponyville, she saw the weather pegasi setting up for the storm to come. “Maybe I’ll visit Twilight if she’s not busy with Princess stuff”, she thought out loud.
Lemon stopped as she reached her destination, her boyfriend Autumn Leaf’s house. Lemon opened the door as she knew Autumn wouldn’t mind. “Autumn I’m here“. Lemon froze. What she saw bewildered her, HER ‘boyfriend’ kissing another mare. “Autumn, what the heck is going on here?”
Autumn froze up hearing his seemingly ‘other’ girlfriend. “L-lemon thi-this isn-isn’t what lo-looks like”, Autumn stammered not finding his words from nervousness.
“Who are you and how do you know my boyfriend?”, the mare asked.
Lemon twitched in anger. “Your boyfriend? We have been dating for about half a year now! Right Autumn?!” Autumn looked away from the two mares. “Autumn how- have you been cheating on me?”, Lemon asked, tears building in her eyes.
“I-I”, Autumn tried to defend himself but he knew couldn’t.
“NO PLEASE NO!!” Lemon thought in disbelief.
Before she could say anything, the other mare spoke, “What are you talking about? Me and Autumn have been dating for three months now!” Lemon felt her heart drop and her legs about to give way. She closed her eyes shaking. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes and shot Autumn a glare that made him think Lemon was going to kill him. “SO YOU HAVE BEEN CHEATING ON ME?”, Lemon yelled as loudly as she could.
Autumn tried, “Lem-Lem please let me explain”.
That did it. He had, he had cheated on her, destroyed her trust in him, proved to her he didn’t love her as much as he said he did, if at all and he dared to call her by his little pet name for her. Lemon growled, “DO YOU REALLY THINK THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY EXPLAIN THIS IN ANY WAY?! YOU HAVE BEEN CHEATING ON ME FOR HALF THE TIME WE’VE BEEN DATING! WHAT! CAN’T HANDLE THAT YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS ALWAYS IN CANTERLOT, WORKING?! I WORK IN THE CASTLE. YOU THINK ITS EASY TO DROP EVERYTHING AND COME DOWN HERE?! WITH THE PONY SUMMIT COMING UP MOST OF THE CASTLE WORKERS HAVE NOT HAD MUCH TIME OFF IF ANY! I’M LUCKY I GOT SOME TIME OFF!” Lemon ranted, now breathing heavily, tears streaming down her face.
“Lem-Lem I just, I just”, Autumn tried.
“No! Just tell me why were you kissing her”, Lemon pointed.
Autumn, after half an hour of this, knew he had nothing and admitted, “Ok, I give. I’m always lonely when you’re not in town or I’m up in Canterlot.” Lemon cut him off.
“Are you kidding me? I trusted you! Half a year, six months and for half of that time you’ve been doing this!”, Lemon shouted filled with anger and sadness. “That’s it! We’re through if you want to be with a mare in Ponyville so much.”
Autumn tried, “Come on it’s not that bad.”
“Not that bad, Not that bad, NOT THAT BAD, YOU IDIOT! YOU CHEATED ON ME! HOW CAN YOU SAY ITS NOT THAT BAD?! I SEE WHAT KIND OF STALLION YOU ARE. YOU MADE ME THINK YOU LOVED ME. YOU HAD ANOTHER MARE, JUST SO YOU COULD HAVE ONE WHEN I’M NOT HERE! AS I SAID ITS OVER!”, Lemon shouted louder than she thought she even could.
Autumn tried to reach for Lemon with a hoof but she grabbed it with her magic and thrust it down fast. Autumn stained from the pain and without another word, Lemon stormed out of the room and out of the house.
She slammed the door behind her, paused and started crying, then ran away from that house as fast as she could. She eventually realized the storm had started, found a tree and hid under it. “So much for a relaxing week off.” Lemon looked up and saw she was near Twilight’s castle. “I do need somewhere to stay. I hope Twilight won’t mind if I stay with her tonight.”
Lemon walked up to the doors and tried knocking.
Back to the present
“And that’s how I ended up coming here”, Lemon finished.
Twilight put a hoof on Lemon’s shoulder. “I’m so so sorry Lemon and of course you can stay here as long as you need to.” Then both of the mares yawned. “Let’s call it a night.”, Twilight suggested.
Lemon nodded, tired herself. “Ya lets”. Twilight led Lemon to a room. “Here there’s a spare bed in this room”. Lemon bowed a bit. “Goodnight and thank you for letting me get that off my chest”.
Twilight gave her friend a hug and replied, “No problem. I’ll always be there for anypony I’m close with.”
Lemon returned the hug. “This hug is different it's so warm and comfortable.”
Twilight waved as she walked to her room, Twilight got into bed and drifted off to sleep.
She awoke in her bed. “Ah, a bright and sunny day in Ponyville”, she sighed stretching while looking out the window. “I wonder how Lemon slept last night.” She walked out of her room. “Morning Lemon”, she greeted her guest.
“Morning”, Lemon replied in an odd tone.
Twilight brushed it off thinking that this is how she was first thing after waking up. “Ok, let’s get some breakfast.” As Twilight started walking to the kitchen she felt a hoof on her own and she a saw the look Lemon was giving her.
“L-lem-mon, what are you doing!” Twilight was nervous from the look and tone Lemon had.
“I’m just thinking how beautiful you are”, Lemon said in the same odd tone. Then Twilight noticed what was off about it. It was flirtatious!
“Le-Lemon just last night you were upset about Autumn cheating on you. How can you ju-.“ Twilight was cut off by Lemon kissing her.
Twilight’s eyes widened and her wings shot open stiffening. “Why is she doing this and why does this feel so right?” Twilight, now blushing, pushed Lemon off but that didn’t stop her.
“Come on. Twilight, I know you were enjoying it”, Lemon said approaching Twilight.
Twilight, now stammering, replied, “W-w-well I-I g-guess I-.” Twilight stopped when Lemon was right in her face.
“Well, let me continue then.” Twilight didn’t say anything before Lemon wrapped her hooves around her and kissed her. Twilight melted into it.
Twilight’s eyes shot open. She looked around seeing she was in her own room. “So that was just a dream? But why would I have a dream like that?”, Twilight thought out loud. “Twilight are you really this stupid. You obviously like Lemon. Of course, I do. She’s my friend. You know what I mean. You LIKE her, as in love her. You know kiss kiss. Fine, you’re right. I do and yes, I have for a while. Wait! Why am I arguing with myself!”, Twilight thought. Then she looked at her clock and saw it was 7:30 A.M.
“Ok, Twilight just forget about that dream”, Twilight told herself. When she exited her room, she saw Lemon. “Good morning Lemon”, Twilight greeted her friend, trying to hide her own nervousness.
Lemon took a moment to react. “Oh go-good morning, Twi.”
Twilight noticing Lemon’s unease said, “Lemon is something wrong. If it’s about certain events last night we can talk about it more if you want.”
Lemon sighed, “No it’s not about Autumn. I decided he’s not worth the energy to even think about.”
Twilight nodded in understanding. “How about we get some breakfast”, Twilight suggested.
“Ok”, Lemon answered simply as the two mares walked to the kitchen.
Lemon tried to make small talk, “Is Spike here?”.
Twilight shook her head, “No, he’s over at Sweet Apple Acres, a sleepover with the Cutie Mark Crusaders. I wonder what they got into?”, she explained ending with a giggle.
“Wow I never noticed she has a cute laugh. Wait, Lemon, what are you thinking? She’s a princess”
Twilight continued, “What do you want for breakfast anyway?”
Lemon thought for a second “Do you have any Oat Wheat Cereal?”.
Twilight nodded, “Yep, a new box too. Do you want anything else, toast, coffee?”
Lemon answered quickly. “Yes, please for both.”
“Ok, how do you like your coffee?” Twilight asked.
“Just a normal brew, with 2 spoonfuls of sugar.” Lemon replied.
Twilight went over to the coffee maker and had it start brewing, put some bread in her toaster, then got herself and Lemon some cereal. She came back and gave Lemon her bowl. As they were eating, in between spoonfuls they started talking about times before Twilight had moved to Ponyville, some she actually remembered. The toast finished toasting and they ate it during one particular story about when Twinkleshine had accidentally kissed a colt in their class.
They heard the coffee maker beep signifying their coffee was done “Oh, I’ll get that! You said you have 2 sugars. Do you want any milk?”
Lemon thought for a second, “Hmm, I do have milk in my coffee sometimes, hmm eh why not.” Lemon thought before telling Twilight “Sure!”
After Twilight had poured the two cups and added their additions, she looked behind her and saw Lemon looking away with a hoof over her face trying to hide a blush “Nonono, she noticed that I was-“ Lemon thought frantically
“Lemon why are you blushing-“ Twilight stopped. “W-was she staring at my flank?” Twilight asked herself internally “Uhhhh, Lemon do you need something?”
Lemon thought for a second and realized yes, yes she did need something. She needed to talk, “Ya, I need to talk.”
Twilight brought her and Lemon’s coffee to the table “Ok , what do you want to talk to me about?”
“Ok Lemon just tell her about that dream last night, no matter how ashamed you are of it”
Lemon mentally braced herself “Ok, it is about something from last night. I know you realized I was nervous when we first talked this morning.”
Twilight nodded “Yes I did but why are you nervous.”
Lemon sighed, “Well it’s about a dream I had last night."
Twilight raised an eyebrow, "Ok, what was it about?”
Lemon gulped before replying “A-actually it was about us.”
Twilight just looked more confused “’us’?”
Lemon continued “Ok here’s what happened."
Lemon’s dream
Her eyes opened softly. Lemon got out of bed and made her way to the door. When she opened the door, she found Twilight just outside of her room. “Good morning Twi!”, Lemon waved happily.
Twilight yawned slightly, “Hey Lem.”
Lemon laughed a bit “Ha ha, that’s a new one. ‘Lem’ I like it.” Twilight stared at Lemon, the yellow mare feeling something was a bit off but shrugged it off.
Without another word, the two were their way to the kitchen when Twilight bumped against Lemon “Oh! Sorry Twilight. Was that me, or do you need something?”, she questioned.
“No nothing. So are you feeling any better from last night!”
Lemon paused momentarily. “Yes, yes I am,” Lemon claimed. Twilight’s face twitched the smallest bit but Lemon thought she saw a smile “Was that just my imagination, or did she smile”
Twilight then asked something a bit unexpected “I’m a little curious. Have you put any thoughts into dating again or not?”
“That’s a good question. I don’t really know. There are a few stallions I’ve had crushes on.”, Lemon turned her head a small bit to face Twilight. “Maybe I will. There are some stallions I had a crush on in the past.”
“Have you ever had a crush on a mare before?” Twilight asked suddenly.
Lemon was caught off guard by the sudden question “W-why do you ask?” “Does she know that I like her or does she like me?” Lemon had zoned out without noticing. When she snapped back to reality she saw Twilight was right in front of her with her eyes half closed.
“Because I like you!” Twilight responded
Lemon’s eyes widened “Y-you do?”
“Yes, I do and I can tell you like me”, Twilight told her.
“How do you-“, Lemon tried before her voice failed her.
“Well when you were staring into space you were also looking at my flank.”
Lemon started stammering after Twilight’s statement “I-I w-was w-well I-I didn’t mean to- “.
“Oh”, Twilight laughed “I’m not offended. Do you want to look again?”
Back to reality
“Ok, I want to stop there. I just don’t want to go into detail about what happened after that”,Lemon said, blushing and shame in her voice.
Twilight patted her on the shoulder, “Hey, it’s ok but if you want to you can whisper it to me.” Lemon whispered what happened in the rest of the dream.
“Ooooh.”, Twilight replied, “I know it’s bad.” Lemon lowered her head.
Twilight turned her head away “Well, yes but y-you’re not the only one who wanted to hide their dream.”
Lemon shot her head up and opened her eyes wide “Not the only? You mean you had a dream like I did last night”
Twilight nodded shakily “Yeah, but not entirely like it. In mine, you kissed me on the lips” Twilight informed her friend, ending with her voice going quiet.
“I did? Well anything else you want to talk about” Lemon pressed.
Twilight sighed, “Well not really. That’s the biggest thing that happened.”
Lemon thought about what Twilight said, “She sounds a bit upset but why would she?”
“So, is what you said in your dream, that you have a crush on me, true?”, Twilight tried asking.
Lemon who was caught off guard blushed while saying, “Y-yes it’s true.”
Twilight straightened up, “It is?”.
Lemon nodded, “Yes, even before you moved to Ponyville”.
This fact surprised Twilight. “So she’s liked me for that long?” Then feeling she would tear up she asked, “Why didn’t you say anything?”
“It’s obvious, isn’t it. I knew if I asked before you moved, you wouldn’t have cared, knowing you back then” Lemon answered sadly.
“*Sniff* you’re right. I wouldn’t. I barely cared about friendship back then. Like I would care about having a special somepony.” Twilight agreed, a few tears running down her cheeks.
“T-Twi, are you crying?” Lemon asked, reaching her hoof out to comfort her friend.
“A little, *sniff*” The purple mare admitted.
“But why?”, Lemon asked simply.
Twilight wiped the tears from her face. “Like I just said you were right.”
“Duh! Lemon Hearts, were you listening”, Lemon internally facehoofed. “Well are you feeling any better?”, Lemon asked.
Twilight nodded, “But what about after I moved to Ponyville? Other than thinking I had moved on from you and others in Canterlot and of course Lyra here in Ponyville.” Twilight questioned.
“Well I figured I wouldn’t stand a chance after you saved Equestria from Nightmare Moon and other threats and then becoming an alicorn Princess.” Lemon explained.
Twilight waved her hooves in front of her saying, somewhat defensively, “Hey, hey, hey I’m still a normal pony after all that”.
“Ya, I know. You’ve said that multiple times in the past.”, Lemon laughed. After that she then asked Twilight, “But why do you ask what I said in a dream was true?”
“Ok, Twilight, you can do this. She said she has feelings for you. Now you can do it. You can tell her how you feel!” After that thought Twilight took a deep breath and said “Because I like you the way you said you liked me.”
Lemon lifted head up, “S-she actually likes me! Even though she’s- hey remember she doesn’t like her being a princess being pointed out, especially by her friends.” Lemon asked the question that was on her mind first, “Then how long have you had feelings for me?”
“We’re going to be asking each other the same questions, aren’t we?” Twilight laughed.
Lemon also chucked a bit, “I guess we are but can you answer my question?”
Then Twilight answered, “I can’t place the time exactly but I’d say about a month after I patched things up with you and the others.”
Her answer surprised Lemon, making her eyes widen. “T-that was a bit before Autumn and I started dating.” Lemon raised a hoof. “So, a month or few weeks before Autumn and I started dating?”, she asked pressingly.
“Yes, about that long, give or take”, Twilight answered. She then continued answering the question that she expected to be asked “and if you want to know why I didn’t tell you, well I was going to but by the time I had worked it up to tell you, you and Autumn had started dating.”
Lemon raised her eye brows a small bit, “Really nothing about you being a princess and me not being royalty?”.
Twilight sighed, “At first, I was, until I talked to Shining. He told me, ‘Twily are you kidding!? I dated and married Cadance, who is an alicorn princess and now we have Flurry Heart. So, what I’m saying is just because you’re a princess doesn’t mean you have to marry a prince. Heck you don’t even have to marry stallion, period so I say you should tell Lemon how you feel’.” Twilight, imitating her older brother, said, “So it wasn’t that much of a problem after that.”
“Really that quick? Oh! And nice Shining Armor impression,” Lemon complimented laughing slightly.
“Yeah it was that quick. I have one more question, Lemon Hearts, why do you like me?”, Twilight asked.
“She wants to know what made me like her?” Lemon thought before giving her answer “Well, you’re one of the smartest ponies I’ve ever known. You were always ahead of the class. You’re caring to everpony and I… Well I always thought you looked pretty.” Lemon explained, ending with a blush.
Twilight put her hoof over her mouth. “You-You really think I look pretty? I-I don’t know what to say”, she said, her cheeks red.
“Yeah, now you, same question. What made you like me?” Lemon asked pointing at Twilight, then herself.
“Well, other than Moondancer, I probably have the most in common with you out of all my Canterlot friends. You’re more soft-spoken which is kinda cute. You’re funny, honest. You always show you care and I-I also find you pretty”, Twilight gave her explanation.
After the two mares had given their answers about how they felt, they both fell silent until they both started chuckling. “So, we both…”, Twilight started.
“Had been worried for no reason!”, Lemon finished. The two mares continued laughing for a few minutes.
Their laughter was only stopped when they heard a young voice ask, “What’s going on here?”
The two mares turned to see a purple and green baby dragon. “Spike!”, they both said.
“Yeah I just got home from Sweet Apple Acres but Twi, why is Lemon Hearts here?” Spike asked.
“Oh, I’m staying in Ponyville for a week”, Lemon answered the young dragon’s question.
Spike smiled “You are? What are you doing? We have got to hang out at least one day!”
Lemon chuckled at the little guy’s enthusiasm.
“Yep, I don’t know what I’m doing and of course!”, she answered his questions.
“Does Autumn know you’re here?” Lemon slightly twitched at Spike’s question. “Yeah, he does. In fact he was the first to know”, Lemon replied in a bitter tone.
Spike was surprised at this. “Uhh did I miss something? Why are you so mad Lemon?”
“I broke up with him last night”, Lemon explained.
“Wha-What y-you h-he, But why”, Spike asked, struggling to find his words.
Lemon answered quickly, “I caught him cheating on me.”
Spike’s tone went from confused to furious. “HE WHAT?! WITH WHO”, he shouted almost spitting fire.
Lemon sighed, “I don’t know who she was.”
Twilight jumped in before Spike could continue. “Can you try calm down, you almost spat fire there.”
After a moment Spike had calmed down. “Ok, I’m cool, I’m Cool, but you don’t seem to upset about it.”
Lemon nodded, “Yeah I slept on it and decided to put Autumn behind me.”
Spike replied saying, “Good for you. So, are you staying here in the castle or the Hay and Stay Hotel? Or are you going back to Canterlot?”
“No, I’m still staying in Ponyville.” Lemon shook her head, “But I don’t know where I’m going to stay anymore. I WAS going to stay with Autumn so I didn’t bring enough bits to stay in a hotel and everything else I was going to do”, Lemon said putting a hoof on her cheek obviously annoyed with herself.
“Oh, well you can stay here in the castle with the two of us”, Twilight suggested.
“Ok are you sure? I don’t want to intrude or overstay my welcome”, Lemon replied.
“Nonsense! It’s only a week!”, Twilight insisted. “I also feel we have still a bit to talk about”, she said insinuating the conversation she and Lemon had before Spike had come in.
Lemon blushed and chuckled lightly. “I guess you’re right about that.”
Spike scratched his head confused again. “Ok yeah, I definitely missed something! What are you two talking about?”
The mares looked at each other. “Well before you got back Lemon and I were talking about some things we’ve both been keeping from the other”, Twilight explained.
"You mean you finally told her about your feelings, good job Twilight!”, Spike smiled.
“And I told her about mine.” Lemon looked down trying to hide her blush.
“You mean you like Twilight, Lemon?” Spike asked.
“Yeah, I do.” Lemon responded simply.
”Wow! that’s great for both of you. But Lemon are you sure you’re ready for a new relationship?” Spike asked
“Well I don’t think I’m ready for a serious relationship, but I might be willing to try a new relationship” Lemon said turning her head towards Twilight.
“Really are you talking about one with me?” Twilight asked.
Lemon nodded smiling sheepishly. “Yes I am.”
“Uhhhhh, I’ll just be in my room reading some comics and diving in to my gem collection” Spike said as he left the kitchen. “See you two later.” Spike added.
“So, do you really think that a relationship, between the two of us could work?” Twilight asked.
“Well, we’ll never know unless we give it a try. But I really hope that it can work.” Lemon answered.
Twilight agreed, “Then let’s give it a try!”
“I’m not doing much anymore this week. So, do you wanna get lunch or dinner at least once this week, if you’re not busy with princess stuff”, Lemon asked.
“I would love to! I won’t have any royal duties until the Pony Summit next week”, Twilight exclaimed. “So, where do you want to go anyway?”, she questioned.
“I don’t know. Where do you want to go?”, Lemon shrugged.
“Well there’s a nice country restaurant, the Hoof Trail. Do you want to try there?”, Twilight said tapping a hoof on her mouth in thought.
“Sure. I’ve been there before.” Lemon nodded. “So, when do you want to go? How about Wednesday?”, she continued.
“Perfect!” was Twilight’s response.
“So, it’s settled! We’ll have dinner at the Hoof Trail Wednesday!” Lemon replied.
After their plans had been settled Lemon got off her chair saying, “Well now then I think I’ll go for a walk and maybe see I can find Lyra.” She waved.
“Wait, did you bring any luggage with you?”, Twilight almost shouted.
Lemon nodded but before Twilight could react, she said “But I have a spell on my suitcase, that if I lose it, all I have to do is use the spell and its teleported to me. I used it last night. So don’t worry. It’s in the room I slept in last night.”
Twilight sighed with relief, “Ok then enjoy your walk”.
Lemon then asked, “What don’t want to join me?”
Twilight said, “I kind of have to… Catch up on some reading!” She smiled an obviously forced smile.
“Ok.” Lemon said leaving. In the hallway she chuckled softly. “Knowing her she’s probably going to read a book about how to date a mare.”, she thought knowingly before leaving the castle.
Once she had left Twilight went to her castle’s library and started looking through the shelves. “E,F,G,H. Ok *incoherent mumbling* ah here it is ‘How To Make A Good First Date’. This date needs to be perfect as possible!”, she said to nopony in particular.
Author's Note
My first fanfiction I'm a bit nervous (I'm willing to listen to criticism)