Fluttershy's Admirer

by cryptix

Rating: everyone
Tags: Romance, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2255

An unwelcome visitor leads to misguided matchmaking and mares kissing mares.

Fluttershy doesn't know how to deal with crushes, whether they're her own or somepony else's. But when a new pony moves to Equestria and takes a sudden interest in everyone's favorite animal-lover, Fluttershy has to take extreme measures. With the help of a certain pink party mare, Fluttershy might be able to devise a plan to get rid of him for good...if she's willing to risk her heart.

(FlutterPie oneshot with a heavy side of TwiDash)

Published 2017-12-14 00:30:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-12-14 00:30:06 UTC

The Lesbian Pony Agenda

Author's Note

Yes, I'm still writing In Somepony Else's Horseshoes, and no, I'm not dead. I just had a really cute idea and wanted to get it out. It's short but sweet (hopefully). I'm aware it's not exactly top-notch quality, but I wanted to try and cure my pony writers block by writing something involving my OTPs. Just another warning for the TwiDash haters (why would you hate it though?!?): this is HEAVY side TwiDash. It's not implied, it's just THERE. Just making sure you're aware. Anyway, enjoy, and please don't judge too harshly. I had to move it over from Docs, so a few mistakes may have been made in the translation process. (I might add a prequel chapter about Fluttershy actually meeting the guy. Maybe not. If time permits...)

The Lesbian Pony Agenda

“Fluttershy! Fluttershy, my dearest, lovely heart, where are you?”

Fluttershy ducked down, using her wings to cover her face. The pale yellow pegasus was slowly creeping down an alleyway, pressing herself up close to the wall. She was determined at all costs to avoid the pony calling her name.

“Hey, Flutters! Watcha doing?”

Fluttershy squeaked in fright, using her visitor’s tail to cover her face. “Pinkie Pie! Shhhhh. You’ll give me away!”

“Oooh, are you playing hide and seek? Can I play? I love, love, LOVE hide and seek!”

“Um...okay. Just be very, very quiet, and let me know if you see a dark blue earth pony with a brown mane and tan eyes.”

“Like that guy over there?”

Fluttershy whirled around, only to find herself staring at the very pony she had just stated to be avoiding. Still calling her name, he seemed to have not noticed her yet, but Fluttershy couldn’t take any chances. Snatching Pinkie Pie up by the hoof, she raced into the nearest building-which, by a remarkably lucky coincidence, happened to be Sugarcube Corner. The pegasus supposed that explained Pinkie’s sudden appearance; she must have just left.

“Hello, there, Fluttershy! What’s got you in such a hurry?”

“Oh-hello, Mrs. Cake. I’m so sorry for barging in like this.”

“Oh, no, that’s perfectly fine, dear.”

“I was just in a bit of a hurry and decided to, um, pay a visit?”

“We’re playing hide-and-seek,” Pinkie Pie informed Mrs. Cake. “Fluttershy was hiding from-”

Fluttershy slapped a hoof over the pink pony’s mouth. “-nopony! I mean, I wasn’t really hiding, I was just, er, going to Sugarcube Corner the secret way?”

“But-” Pinkie was about to interrupt, but Fluttershy quickly interrupted.
Fluttershy glanced at Pinkie. “Pinkie Pie? Can I talk to you? Upstairs? In your bedroom?”

Fluttershy was painfully aware that this was a horrible choice of words as soon as Mrs. Cake gave a knowing smile at Pinkie Pie. The yellow pegasus turned a shade of red that would not be out of place on a tomato and murmured something unintelligible before following her bouncing earth pony friend upstairs.

As soon as they were in the relative privacy of Pinkie Pie’s remarkably colorful bedroom, the party pony wasted no time in asking, “So. What’s got your tail in a twirl about that guy outside?”

“Shhhh! He might be listening!”

“Fine, then.” Pinkie switched to a dramatic whisper. “What’s got your tail in a twirl about that guy outside?” She continued in her regular voice. “Your tail’s too cute to get all twirly! Never change, Fluttertail! Stay just how you are! I mean, not that your tail is particularly adorable compared to, say, my tail or anything. I just, uh, noticed that its adorability is generally higher compared to most tails, is all.”

“Um….thanks, Pinkie.”

“Now! Give me the full scoop on that guy!”

“Well…” Fluttershy couldn’t help but blush a little out of pure embarrassment. “He’s visiting from far away, and I guess I was the first pony he met in town and...he has a crush on me now, and he just won’t leave me alone!”

Pinkie gasped loudly. “He’s new in town? How could I have missed him? I need to throw a party and get all the supplies and send out invitations and…”

She trailed off, noticing Fluttershy’s pained and embarrassed face. “Or….fix your problem first, Flutter-butter.”

“I’ve tried everything-asking politely, ignoring him, and now I’m left to hiding from him. Can you help me, Pinkie?”

“Well, I know just about everything there is to know about ponies, so I’ll bet I can figure something out! Just gimme a sec…”

Pinkie went completely still, only moving to give a “Hmmmm…” and occasionally blinking. Just as Fluttershy was about to apologize for wasting her pink friend’s time, the latter gave a loud, excited gasp, nearly startling Fluttershy off the bed. “THAT’S IT!”

“What is it?”

Pinkie whirled around, sky-blue eyes meeting teal ones. “We’ve got to get you a special somepony!”

“W-what?”

Fluttershy didn’t date. She almost never did, and when she did, she was always too shy to carry on any sort of meaningful conversation with her date, and by the end was always left feeling too painfully awkward to even consider a second one. Pinkie Pie had had crazy ideas in the past, but this might have been the craziest-and definitely one of the most terrifying.

“Not a real special somepony, silly!” Pinkie grabbed Fluttershy by the shoulders, forcing her to look her in the eye. “We’ve gotta set you up on a date somewhere he’ll be sure to see you. Then, he’ll think that you’re off the market, and he’ll leave you alone! It’s the perfect plan!”

“But who would I go on a date with?” Fluttershy inquired, still not sure if she was onboard with this.

“Well...do you have a crush? Because, OMIGOSH, if you did, that would be PERFECT because you could ask them on a date, like, as friends, and see if they liked you back, and then you could ask them out FOR REAL!”

“A-a c-c-crush? Pinkie, I don’t think-”

“So you DO! Ha! Your face is reeeeeddd!”

“I’m aware.”

“Okay! Come on, tell me! Your secret’s safe with me. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!”

“I...I…”

You can do it. This is your chance. Come on. Tell the truth. Tell. The. Truth.
“I...I like...R-Rainbow Dash!”

Fluttershy grabbed a pillow with which to bury her muzzle in and hide her blushing face. If she hadn’t hidden herself, she would have seen Pinkie’s mane deflate a little bit, with a barely audible fizzle. “T-that’s great! Now I have to go-uh, wash my hooves!”

The pink mare dashed out of the room creating a wind that ruffled Fluttershy’s mane. Lost in her own world and berating herself, Fluttershy barely noticed Pinkie Pie leave; she did, however, notice her return. “Oh, Pinkie, I feel ridiculous. I can’t ask my friend on a date; she’ll laugh at me!”

“Dashie’s your friend! She’d never laugh at you!”

“She would if I did something like ask her on a date!”

“Remember? The date is actually fake! It’s all part of the plan, Shy-Shy! Don’t worry! I’m on top of this like caramel on a candy apple! Trust me.”

“Oh, Pinkie...you’re the best friend a pony could ask for.”

Pinkie’s stupid, traitorous mane just wouldn’t fluff up like normal. She put on a cheery smile. “That’s me, all right-everypony’s friend!”

~~~

This is a terrible idea. An absolutely terrible idea! She’s going to never want to see me again! Shhhhhh. Focus, Fluttershy. The yellow pegasus stared at the door in front of her. She only had to take a few steps into Rainbow’s cloudominium, and then she just had to explain to her that this was a joke. Right? She could do that. It’s all for a good cause. That pony who keeps following you will finally leave you alone…
Fluttershy took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

There was no answer.

Maybe she didn’t hear me? She tried knocking again. Still no answer.

This was odd. It wasn’t like Rainbow to leave without warning on one of her break days, and she would have definitely left a note with somepony about where she was going. But nopony had heard anything, not even...Pinkie Pie.
She risked a glance back down towards the ground, where her colorful companion was cheering her on. For Pinkie...I suppose I’ll have to humor her wishes.
Rainbow Dash did usually leave her home unlocked...Fluttershy hesitated. She didn’t like to enter unannounced, but she would also rather get this over with as quickly as possible. She pushed open Rainbow’s door and stepped inside.

After the entry hall, she made a quick turn right. “Rainbow Dash? Are you here? I need to ask you somethi-”

The yellow pegasus stopped short. An all-too-familiar heat was rising in her cheeks at the sight before her. Rainbow Dash was, in fact, home, but her couch was occupied by not just herself, but Twilight Sparkle. Two copies of Daring Do lay on a cushion near the sofa, but the two ponies seemed entirely preoccupied with each other at the moment. Rainbow and Twilight, cuddled in a blanket, were currently locking muzzles in between little nuzzles and rubbing of their wings against each other.

Fluttershy was torn between leaving immediately and giving her friend privacy, or staying and making the couple aware of her existence. Just as she was about to back away and pretend like she had never been there, Twilight’s head snapped up, her face nearly instantly becoming just as cherry red as Fluttershy’s, if not even more so.

“Twi? What’s-”

The rainbow-maned pegasus simply gaped at the appearance of Fluttershy in her home, as if the pegasus would turn out to be just a figment of her imagination.

“I-I-I’m so sorry, Rainbow, Twilight,” Fluttershy finally stumbled out, her words falling over each other in her embarrassment. “I was just coming over to visit, but I see you’re, um, busy, so I-I’ll leave.”

Rainbow, seeming to finally recover from her shock, spoke quickly. “It’s fine, Fluttershy, uh, you can stay if you want to. Me and Twilight were just, uhh, having our weekly reading session and we got a little...carried away…”

“Rainbow!” Twilight hissed. Turning a smile on Fluttershy, she said, “You don’t have to feel pressured into leaving, Fluttershy. You can do whatever you want. I’m sorry we...uh...weren’t at our most presentable just then.”

“Oh, no! I’d never dream of intruding on your privacy. I’ll just be going. Don’t mind me!” Fluttershy turned to leave, right before another thought occurred to her. “Oh...and congratulations!”

~~~

“So! Didja ask? Didja ask her?”

Pinkie was bouncing in her excitement, nearly bursting with energy. Nothing out of the ordinary for her.

Fluttershy smiled and shook her head. “I don't want to go on a date with Rainbow Dash after all. It wouldn’t be fair to her to go out with somepony she doesn’t love.”

“But-”

“FLUTTERSHY! At long last, my love, we meet again! Come into my embrace, my dearest, and accept our romance!”

Fluttershy yelped in fright. After so long, her luck had finally run out. She was face to face with her admirer...with nowhere to run. “Fluttershy! The pony of my heart! Come and seal our fated love and give yourself over to me!~”

“HEY!”

Fluttershy blinked. Was Pinkie Pie...confronting that pony? To his face? “You leave Fluttershy alone! Can’t you see you’re just freaking her out? Go home, mister! You’re not fun!”

Rudely shoving Pinkie out of the way, the stallion leaned towards Fluttershy. “Come with me, my dearest! We are meant to be!”

Fluttershy risked one more desperate glance at Pinkie. Pinkie looked back. The mare locked eyes with her. I’m sorry, the pink pony mouthed. She laid her hooves on Fluttershy’s shoulders and pulled her close. Then, Fluttershy’s world exploded.

Pinkie’s muzzle on hers and her tail twining around hers and stars behind her eyes and it felt like everything, everything right here. When it was done, she couldn’t do anything but lie in the grass. At least, until Pinkie started talking and the world came in focus again.

“I’m so so so sorry but I had to do something I mean I couldn’t just stand there while he did that to you and the first thing I thought of was give him competition and I didn’tthinkIjustwentandIunderstandifyoudon’twanttobefriendsanymoreoryouthinkthatwastotallyunfunofmebecauseI’msorryI’msorryI’msorryI’m-”
“PINKAMENA DIANE PIE!”
A slightly shell-shocked Pinkie Pie turned to face a slightly pink pegasus, covering her mouth with one hoof and a “did I do that?” expression on her face. “Sorry..”

“By all means continue, ma’am.”

Fluttershy gave a little giggle. “Pinkie...you have nothing to apologize for. I liked that-just now-more than I’ve ever liked almost anything.”

Pinkie gaped. “But...you said you liked Rainbow Dash.”

“I lied,” Fluttershy admitted. “I didn’t want to alienate you or ruin our friendship. I’d do anything before I let that happen. And I’m sorry if it really was just an impulse and you don’t feel the same way...but I think I’ve liked you now for a long time, Pinkie Pie. I just couldn’t admit it before.”

Pinkie’s eyes welled up with tears. She took Fluttershy in an embrace. The two mares stood silently for a few minutes, letting the heat from their bodies fill the empty space and hum with energy. “Flutters,” she whispered, “you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to hear that.”

~~~

“Awww... that’s actually kinda adorable.”

“Rainbow! We shouldn’t spy on them.”

“Hey, consider it payback for what Flutters walked into earlier.”

“That was an accident. This is purposeful.”
“Potato, potahto, Twi.”