Chaos Rules All

by Shadowflameking

Rating: teen
Tags: Self Insert, Adventure, Random, Discord, Princess Celestia, Human, Anthro, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 4994

Max gets sent to equestria and something awesome happens to him

One day i take a walk home from work,i should have just gone to a hotel for the night if i had known what was going to happen

Published 2017-12-14 00:00:11 UTC
Last updated 2018-05-18 13:49:01 UTC

chapter 2

With a groan I woke up, I tried to rub my forehead but found my arms and legs held in place by chains.
It seems that the locals did not take very kindly to me defending myself, but I'm pretty sure I was painted as the big bad monster stomping around with scary glowing eyes

“Uhhg my head feels like i was hit with a truck…”

“Ah. You’re awake. You’ve been out for a day. My name is Doctor Quick Sketch. I know you may have many questions about where you are, but those questions of yours will be answered in all due time.” The doctor picks up a medical clipboard and starts packing up his equipment, before signaling to the guard.

The guard opens the cell door for the doctor to step out, before re-locking the door, standing outside.

I look around the cell, noting that it looks as if it has not been used in years. I look to the guard.

“Hey, can you tell me where I am?” I say in a board tone, slightly tugging at the chains.

The guard stays silent, a stoic expression on his face, not a muscle twitching, nor eye moving to glance at you.

“Hey I'm talking to you, ya storm trooper rip off”

The guard takes no notice, mentally chalking it down to the creatures homes culture.

“Jeez you're more of a buzzkill than buzz Killington, look can you just go get the person in charge here? I don't like being kept in a small damp cell for no reason”

The guard again, ignored the remarks, but glances to the clock on the wall. This time, the guard turns and walks up a set of stairs. A few seconds later, a different guard walks down the stairs.

Getting tired of being ignored I snap my fingers and the guards armor turns into a frilly pink dress.

The guard this time notices the sudden change of feeling from the weight of his armor. “You, stop what you’re doing! That’s an order!” The guard points his spear towards the cell aggressively, stepping towards it.

“Stop what? I haven't even done anything” The dress is large, pink, frilly, and most of all making him look like a femcolt.

The guard, feeling embarrassed, but not embarrassed enough to abandon his post, calls for backup. “I need backup down here!”

Just before the other guards got here i snapped my fingers again and to add insult to injury, put ruby red lipstick and black eyeliner onto him making him look way more like a mare.

The guard doesn't say anything, apart from growls at you.

The rest of the guards arrive in the room, focused on the task at hoof, but one of them bursts out laughing the second it enters the room, seeing the femguard.

I cant hold it in any more and break out laughing hard “bwahahaha!”

The guard that's laughing sounds female, and clutches her side, laughing loudly, unable to breathe properly. “My sides!”

A guard captain glares at her “private! Restrain yourself! Or I'll have you on guard duty for the rest of the bloomin year!”

The guard immediately shuts up, really not wanting to be stuck at a post for the rest of the year.

I keep snickering some thinking of how girly he looks

The guards keep their weapons pointed at the cell, not daring to take their eyes off of you.

“Hey you gotta admit its funny as hell to see him in that trying to act tough” I say still snickering

The female guard can be seen trying and failing to keep a straight face, as she keeps glancing at the femcolt guard.

The captain rolls his eyes “corporal, get dressed.”

The femcolt drops his weapon and sprints out of the room.

“Bwahahahahaha! Oh my god this is so funny!” I keep laughing till it hurts ,and then some before finally with one last weak chuckle I stop.

The Guard Captain speaks up, glaring at you. “How were you able to do that?”

I give a smirk “a magician never gives up his secrets”

The captain frowns, gritting his teeth. “It’s for your own safety that you tell us.”

I tilt my head to the left raising an eyebrow “And why is that? As far as i know the second I tell you your going to try to find a way to stop it so I can't do anything, well here is some news, I can escape any time I want to, but I'm choosing not to”

The guard Captain glares at you. “It will help your situation in court if you come forward about what you can do, because the last thing you would want to happen, will having to run from the law for the rest of your existence. So do as I say, so you don’t end up in prison for the rest of your life. Now, I'm going to ask you again. How did you do what you did?”

I roll my eyes unimpressed that the petty threat “Magic you moron ,magic” I say with as much sarcasm possible

The captain goes right up to the cell, even more furious. “What. TYPE!?”

I give a grin my eyes glowing red my voice deepening “chaos magic bitch”

The captains pupils shrink to pin pricks. “Somepony get Princess Celestia!”

The female guard who was laughing with you earlier turns and sprints up the stairs to find Celestia.

“Now as you can see, I clearly out class you in power, so you may be wondering why I don't turn you to paste, its because im a nice person and I don't attack unless I'm provoked”

The captain tries to regain his posture “who gave you these powers?”

“Silly horse person, I've always had them” the chains on my arms and legs melt away, not harming me or anyone near me as i calmly sit back on the cot in the cell

The Captain steps back, weary. “I’ve only heard of one other creature who can use chaos magic. He’s an ugly, evil bastard, hell bent on turning everypony insane, and the world into his own personal playground.”

“Heh ,well my kind is naturally chaotic and cruel to most others unless we know and trust them, I one time saw someone stab another person just cause the other guy wanted his gold chain, we have split the atom and made weapons that could destroy my home four times over, war is common, anything you’ve seen, I've seen worse”

The Captain steps back, scared and worried as he’s never actually seen much violence in his life, meaning he lacked the life experience of real combat or anything violent. “What the hell are you…?”

“Why I'm nothing special, I'm only human” i give a large toothy grin at that last part showing him my canines.

The captain is further unnerved and steps back, to another guard, about to say something, when there’s a large, blinding flash.

I let out a yelp and cover my eyes “Ow that hurts!”

A large booming voice fills the room. “YOU WILL CEASE AND DESIST THESE VILE ANTICS YOU ARE STARTING, OR YOU WILL BE TRAPPED IN STONE FOR AN ETERNITY!” The source of the voice was a blue alicorn with a starry flowing mane.

Matching her voice i shout back “SHUT THE HELL UP MY EARS ARE BLEEDING” and true to my word, my ears leak a small bit of blood.

From the looks of things, the rest of the guards in the room are very disoriented as well. The female guard from earlier stumbles down the stairs, tripping over. She is followed by a seemingly unaffected tall, pure white mare, who is also an alicorn.

The mare speaks, unamused and frowning. "Dear Luna, can you please stop using the royal Canterlot voice? It’s going to cause hearing damage, especially to those in a room that echoes.”

The dark blue alicorn bows her head in shame. “I… I apologies for yelling… I shouldn’t have used the royal Canterlot voice like I did…”

I'm covering my ears with my hands as they bleed saying to myself “bloody fucking horse person my fucking ears feel like someone shot a dam nail gun into them!”

Luna turns, glaring daggers at you. “HOW DAR-”

Shes cut off by celestia giving her a nudge with her hands over her ears. “Let me handle this. Lulu.” Celestia gives luna a stern look before uncovering her ears. “My name is Celestia. I am the princess of this kingdom, and this mare right here, is Luna, my sister. I need you to stay calm for me, ok? I just need you to cooperate, and once this whole ordeal is sorted out, perhaps we can all laugh about today in the future.”

I give a confused look “what do you mean cooperate? I'm put here for self defense and last I checked that's not against the law”

Celestia looked confused for a moment. “Self defense? I was told you was terrorizing the town.

I give her a flat unamused look “All i did was walk into town, and everyone started panicking ,some rainbow gay pride flag tried to pick a fight she couldn't win and attacked me”
Celestia sighs, shaking her head, muttering something along the lines “I should’ve known” before looking at you. “That would be Rainbow Dash. she is the type to… over exaggerate things. I’m sorry for her actions.” she goes silent for a few moments. “How did you get to Equestria?”

“Well i was walking home from work, and i opened my door and this bright bang and glow happened ,i walked threw not looking and fell onto the ground it was all plaid and crap”

Celestia freezes for a moment, before speaking again. “Did you, by any chance, see a creature that looked like it was made up of different parts from different creatures?”

“Nope not that I can remember, and I'm sure I'd remember seeing something like that” i let out a yawn

Celestia frowns. “It… maybe it was him… could still be him… are chaos powers natural to your species?”

“Well some of my kind have powers and things like this” I say remembering a few YouTube videos I watched of people walking through walls or teleporting away

Celestia raises an eyebrow. “So it’s rare for your species to be able to do what you can?”

“Eh it's not really known how many really have powers” I say with a shrug.

Celestia frowns a little. “How wouldn’t your species know if they had powers or not?”

“Well we rely most the time on science, and only a select few believe in things such as magic”

“What type of technology? How advanced is your race?” Celestia asks, stepping closer to the cell.

“Oh nothing much, we just split the atom, sent a man to the moon, and that was all like seventy years ago, now we have top notch robotics and robotic animals in development”

Celestia’s eyes widen “your species sent a… man to the moon? How?”

“Simple, technology such as rockets ,here is a quote from one of the biggest world leaders at that time, We do not do this because it is easy, we do it because it is hard, you see my species is driven to explore the world and space around us”

Celestia looks at luna for a moment, registering the fact that Luna looks like she’s going to bombard you with questions. She looks back to you. “You wouldn’t happen to know how to build these things would you?”

“Well it really depends, I can make model rockets and shoot them into the air about twenty feet, but if you want a real one you would need the metals and other things needed to make it, even the special fuel needed to send it into space”

Celestia nods. “What do you need to build this model rocket?”

“Its not very hard, I just need a large plastic bottle, some glue, wood, and some baking soda and vinegar”

“Interesting… so its not machinery?” Celestia asks, intrigued.

“It is but this is a model rocket for kids to play with so i can’t make a real one, even a hellfire missile is to advanced for me to make, and that’s just a weaponized rocket”

“Your species turned them into… weapons? Why would your species do that?”

“Because we are always at war with one another, we even made a bomb that can take out an entire city in one hit, we did so by splitting atoms”

Celestia looked horrified at the last remark. “Your kind… wiped an entire city out with one bomb?! Is that the most powerful weapon your kind has created?”

“That bomb was called an atom bomb, since we made it over seventy years ago we have perfected it making it so nothing survives the blast and made enough to wipe out the planet several times over with one button”

Celestia pales from this. “Why would… why would your kind make that many?! Why? Earth cant be that dangerous… can it?”

“Well princess it's quite simple, we wanted more firepower and so did the other guys so we had something called the cold war, a long period in time when no real fighting took place but where the USA and Russia raced to make nuclear delivery and rocket systems faster, and in the end we have far more nukes than we need”

Celestia looks rather shocked but shakes her head. “So this… USA and Russia were at war, but didn’t actually do any fighting?”

“There was fighting but not in the man to man style like normal, the fighting was a race to get the enemies intelligence and try to out pace there rocket development” I go into great detail on a few rockets and what they were used for, before stopping
“Okay I think that's enough for now”

Celestia spoke after a few minutes of silence. “Your species must be extremely violent to do all of these things…”

“While most of my kin may be violent we have our good sides to” I say with a shrug “it’s about 50-50 when it comes to good and bad with is, we normally go to war to help protect ourselves and sometimes others, does that make war good? No but it make it worth it if you can protect the ones you care about”

Celestia nods, understanding now as to why your species is so violent. “I see… this world has been at peace for just over a millennium with no wars whatsoever. Though there are tensions, but nothing much. That likely explains why we are nowhere near as technologically advanced as your species. But. there has been something bugging me this entire time we have been talking.”

I tilt my head and raise an eyebrow “oh? And what would that be?” I say in a slightly confused tone

“Why haven’t you broken free yet? You have the power to, but you haven’t.”

“Because I was bored and wanted to see what would happen” I say with a large grin

Celestia nods, keeping calm. “So you just wanted to play a game with us?”

“Yup and the fact I did not want to cause your guards to panic and use me as a shish kabob” I say with a snicker

Celestia nods again, relatively satisfied with her answer. “So, you didn’t start the fight down in Ponyville?”

“Nope,I just calmly walked into town and was attacked for no reason because your ponies are racist pricks” I say in a serious tone

Celestia sighs. “That is a common complaint different species of this world have about Equestria. I really am trying to get the Equestrians to open up to other species easier and to not judge a book by its cover.”

“Well then change the cover cause most people read that before they read the book” I say in a deadpan tone

“How would I ‘change the title’ of an entire species? I only say positive things about different species. The Equestrian species is a… prey species, it’s in their instincts to react with a fight or flight response when encountering a different species.”

I break out chuckling “I was joking haha,but anyway can I be let out now and NOT cause your guards to panic and make me into a snack on a stick?”

Celestia responds by opening the door. “Just stay by me, and nothing… unnecessary should happen. I will be giving you a room to stay in before I announce your presence to the world. You have my word that nothing bad will happen to you.”

I give a shrug “alright ,let's get outta here since I hate small spaces”

Celestia nods and the guards move out of the way of you, her and luna, the latter of which had been silent throughout the entire ordeal, embarrassed and ashamed she harmed everyponies hearing in the room.

I whistle as we walk wondering where exactly we are going “so where we headed?”

“An empty room in the castle. It’s usually used by royal guests, but since you’re an alien species that can utilize chaos magic, whom of which, we attacked unprovoked, it will only be fitting that you stay in a royal suite.” Celestia smiles at you, trying to show that she is friendly and, of course, trying to make up for the inconvenience her subjects caused you.

I give a small smile “thanks, I'm Maxwell, but most call me max”

“Nice to meet you Maxwell, but I wish we met under different, less hostile terms. I hope we can all put this behind us and possibly become friends.” She continues walking with you.

“Sure I'd love that, never really had friends heh” I chuckle at the last part.

Celestia looks at you, raising an eyebrow. “You’ve never really had friends? How so?”

“Eh just never bothered to make any or try, I mainly stuck to myself and just ignored others, Ya get used to others ignoring you and start to ignore them” i say with a shrug

Celestia looks down, saddened by this. “It must’ve been lonely for you.”

Luna looks at you and speaks up. “I know the feeling too well… I was trapped on the moon, on my own for one thousand years… no one to talk to, not a soul.”

I shrug again “you get used to living alone after doing it for 10 years so it's just a dull sadness at this point for me i don't really notice it anymore”

Luna sighs. “A thousand years drag on for what feels like eternity when there’s nopony to talk to… I just hope you don’t experience the same fate.”

“Thanks luna” I say cracking my neck

They walk for another few minutes before finally stopping outside of a room.

Celestia is the first to speak up.

“This will be your room for the week. I will hold a speech on Friday to announce your arrival on this planet. I will need you to be wearing something tidy as to give a good impression. And please, when I announce your existence, don’t be rude. It will only complicate matters.” She opens the door to a large bedroom, which contains a king sized bed, a large cabinet, an alcohol beuro, and a balcony. You can see an ensuite and a bookshelf as well in the room. “I hope the room is to your liking.”

“It is thank you ,I hope you have a nice day” I say walking inside and sitting down on the bed

Celestia turns to leave you, but turns back to you. “I hope you don’t mind, but I'll be leaving two guards outside of your room. If you need anything, just tell them and one will go and fetch what you need. And if you really want to, you can talk to them. And one more thing. Dinner at 6pm, but you can always help yourself to something from the kitchen. Now have a nice day, young Maxwell, i shall see you at dinner.” and with that, she and luna turned and walked away, followed by most of the guards. Luna looks back to you, waving a little as she walks away. The guards stand outside of your room, one of them was the female guard from earlier.

I chuckle and wave back before floating up some and with a snap of my fingers a can of coke was in my hand and in the guards hands as i sip mine with a smirk.

The guards look at the cans in their hands, confused.

The female guard speaks up, inspecting the can. “so… this a drink you have on… Earth, is it?”

“Yup! One of the most famous ones out there, it’s called coca cola” I say taking a sip of mine

The female guard looks at the drink can carefully. “This an alcoholic one? Or is it just an ordinary fizzy drink?”

“Just a normal one heh if its booze you want you came to the wrong guy heh”

The female guard shrugs. “I’m not really that much of an alcoholic, no need to worry.” She opens the can and tastes a little. “Mmm… tastes good. I’m Golden Spear, this guy next to me is Iron Hooves.”

Iron Hooves nods. “Howdy.”

“And i am Maxwell, but most call me max”

Golden Spear nods. “We both got your name when you told the princess it. But nice to meet you properly Max.”

“Same to you two, now have a good day and all that, I'm just gonna read for awhile” I say picking up a book

Golden turns and steps outside with Iron Hooves and speaks up. “If you need us, just holler.”

I yell back “alright!” and open my book as I start reading

Author's Note

Co-author for this was I_Iteration ,and on a side note I'm surprised you guys wanted more so I gave it to ya

The only chapter

﻿I was walking home from work one night, my watch said it was around 10:30 pm. I had just got to my front door before I heard a big BANG! And when I looked at my door I saw that it was glowing red, I thought it was just the Christmas lights that I had placed all over my house so I unlocked it and without looking walked in, and fell flat on my face. I looked around after getting up with a groan rubbing my forehead and what I saw made me freeze, it was day time and the ground was plaid, pigs were flying, and saw dancing buffalo.

I thought for sure that I had just been drugged or something when the ugliest thing I have ever seen just popped out of nowhere in front of me.

And then something even more shocking happened, it spoke to me.
“Why hello there! I brought you here for a favor from you.” he said with a large grin just floating there.
I looked horrified and disgusted at this thing since it looked like someone took a random bunch of animal parts and mashed them together for some ugly thing like that.

“And what would that be?” I asked in a somewhat nervous tone.

“Why I wanted you to take my place for a few centuries till ‘ol cake butt calms down”

“And what exactly would i get out of this?” I said in a greedy tone, I wasn't stupid I knew what would happen if i said yes, but the power was far too tempting for me not to say yes

“Why you would be getting my powers while I wait it out in the back of your mind.”

I gave a look like I was deep in thought, but I had already made my choice, and with a grin I said “I would be glad to help out a pal”

The being that I later learned was named discord smiled and shook my hand, it felt as if someone was pounding my brain with a hammer as I collapse to the ground in agony and everything went black.

When I woke up about two hours later everything looked like it should, or at least the colors did somewhat but still looked too bright and unreal along with the texture made everything look like it was from a cartoon. As I stood up I felt, lighter and stronger and I remembered what had happened, I grinned and snapped my fingers, and with a pop a can of coca cola fell into my hand.

“Oh hell yes I'm going to love this!” then discord spoke to me from my mind

“Glad to see your enjoying yourself there, but remember try to stay hidden and avoid ponies unless it is unavoidable.”

“Ponies?” I asked in a confused tone, because as far as I knew ponies where just farm animals.

“It's what the beings of this world call themselves, now I'm going to go quiet and don't mention my name, if anyone or anything asks if you know me, say no unless you want to be stoned and used as a lawn ornament.”

I gulped at that “Alright, I won't but can you tell me why I shouldn't mention your name or meeting you?” I asked in a curious tone since I wanted to know what exactly I was dealing with.

“Because I'm discord the god of chaos and disharmony, and now that you have my powers they wont know its me so long as you can convince them its natural for your species to have chaos magic.”
I looked around as I started walking to that town I saw in the distance

“Well if they don't know what I am then what's the point in hiding? It will just make me look suspicious to them if i were to run and hide every time I saw a pony,”

He did not respond, not even a peep so I'm guessing he went dark, and as I walked into town I saw something that a few hours ago would have made me scream and run, it was anthropomorphic ponies, and they were all staring at me, as a random pony in a group of three shouted

“MONSTER! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!”

This set the town into a panic as they all fled faster than I thought possible, some even leaving dust trails like from the cartoons, and I heard another yell out from above me

“Get out of our town you monster!”

I was just able to look up and see a blue rainbow blur speeding towards me before I felt as if I had been hit by a truck and crashed into a house ten feet behind me as I let out a scream of pain.

“YEAH! That oughta teach you not to mess with the one and only rainbow dash!”

Now I have some anger issues so it's hard to keep my anger in check and being attacked for nothing is one of those times I willingly let go of my anger, and let it do the talking, or hitting more like, for me.
So as I got up my eyes glowed red with rage.

“Big mistake missy, all I did was walk into your town, everyone panics, and then you have the NERVE to attack me for no reason!?

I lifted my hand up as she had a stunned look on her face as a golden white glow grabbed her, and slammed her into the very same house she slammed me into. She went down like a sack of potatoes.
And just as I started to calm down five others showed up and they each let out a gasp as they saw what I had just done. Each one of them hurt my eyes with their bright colors, the colors where in order of purple, yellow, pink, white, and orange.

“HEY! That's not very nice! No party for you Mister meanie pants!” the pink one shouted.

I made quick work of them with a quick knock out spell and they fell to the floor like rocks, I did not want to hurt any of them since I already hurt one of them in self defense.
I had only harmed one that called herself Rainbow Dash, and had taken out the others in a non harmful way there was a bright flash and I saw there was a large pony with a long horn and wings, her white fur and multi color mane made her colors more soft than the bright glaring colors of most other ponies i had seen.
Her horn light up yellow humming with power as she looked at me a small frown on her face.

“I Princess Celestia hereby declare you under arrest for harming my little ponies.”

I looked at her as a large beam of yellow light was shot at me, I did not have any warning and was only able to say
“Oh shit!”
Before everything went dark.

Author's Note

This is my very first time trying to make a story or even trying my hand at writing so i may not post another story or i may,it really just depends on if i have the time and if i can think of an idea to write with

Notice

I have forgotten about this story,and its been far to long for me to try and write for it again so this story is canceled sadly,i have plans for every multi chapter story I write but as i stated in one of my blogs the pc i use got reset so i have lost every plan and pre written down story idea,so this one was left forgotton,but i wont delete it so i may remember it as my first story i posted here