A Lesson in Skinny Love

by PeripheralPone

Rating: everyone
Tags: Applejack, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Romance, Comedy, Pinkie Pie
Length: 5235

Come on, skinny love, just last the year. (Or until Applejack's sanity ends. Whichever comes first)

Skinny Love - noun; when two ponies love each other but are too shy to admit it.

Rainbow Dash is a closeted mess.

Pinkie Pie is trying her best.

Applejack just wants them to bang and get it over with.

C'mon, skinny love, just last the year.

(Or until Applejack's sanity cracks. Whichever comes first)

Published 2017-12-19 10:40:07 UTC
Last updated 2017-12-24 06:00:12 UTC

MLP, but Gay

Author's Note

This story might seem familiar and that's because it is. I wrote this story before and then deleted it during my Mental Breakdown and then ~~abandoned it completely~~ didn't update it.

BUT we're back baby and I'm writing again. So enjoy!

MLP, but Gay

The land of Equestria was appropriately named for the abundance of equines that live there. There were tall ones, fat ones, lanky ones, two-toned or multi-hued. Pegasi, earth ponies, and unicorns (and alicorns if you’re friends with the right pony). There are the friendly ones, the shy ones, the arrogant ones, the snooty ones.

In such a population of so many variants, there’s bound to be secrets that one holds about themselves. Maybe Mrs. Cake doesn’t want Mr.Cake to know that she sneaks sweets long after Celestia lays her sun to rest for the night, and maybe Mr. Cake doesn’t want his wife to know that he already knows. Perhaps Cheerilee would like to keep to herself that she owns her very own copy of Fifty Bales of Hay.

Maybe world-renowned hero and top Wonderbolts performer Rainbow Dash wants to keep the fact that she’s into mares a secret from her friends. Especially a certain pink party pony.

It was a bright, sunny day in Ponyville when Applejack and the rest of her friends grabbed a table at the local café. The table was large and circular, more than enough to seat the tittering young mares. Rarity was speaking boisterously about her new line of clothing as they sat down, and Applejack couldn’t help but return a couple of the glares thrown their way. It was a group of six mares, of course they were going to be loud.

“It will take a bit of work, of course, but I think if I really concentrate I can have the whole line out just in time for autumn,” Rarity claimed as she sat down. Fluttershy sat to the unicorn’s left with a smile and a murmur of congratulations. Twilight sat to Rarity’s right, wrapping the chair in her lilac glow and pulling it out carefully.

“Wow, Rarity!” Twilight exclaimed. “Sounds like you have your work cut out for you. I mean, twelve dresses for a line before the beginning of fall?” At that, Rarity waved a hoof in dismissal as Applejack took her seat next to Twilight while Dash sat across from the farm pony, directly next to Fluttershy.

“Like I said, a bit of work. But think of all of the business this will draw in!” She sighed happily crossed her hooves on the table. “Any fashion-conscious pony will be looking for a new wardrobe to accommodate the fall season, you know. And when they go on their shopping spree it shall be Rarity who saves the day!”

It was then that Pinkie plopped down next to Rainbow Dash, finally back from her trip to the bathroom. Applejack didn’t miss the way that the blue Pegasus seemed to perk up at the sight of their friend, nor did she miss the subtle brush of pink across the mare’s cheeks. Applejack stifled a sigh, instead smiling at the server who brought their menus and left with the promise that their waiter would be by shortly.

When she looked back across the table she noticed how, as they listened to Rarity’s chattering, Pinkie’s gaze would stray to the pegasus next to her. AJ gave a little roll of her eyes and raised the menu to scan it. Rainbow and Pinkie Pie had been trotting around each other for so long that AJ had given up on betting how long it would take for somepony to make a move. She knew Dash wasn’t out yet, not to anypony except Applejack herself at least, and even that hadn’t been Dash’s choice. Being the Element of Honesty had its perks, and one of those perks was being able to read ponies and being able to tell when they weren’t being truthful. AJ hadn’t missed Dash’s reluctance to ogle stallions in public or how disgusted she’d be at a stallion’s advances. Pinkie, however, was a wildcard. She didn’t seem like the type to hide who she was, but she had pulled the rug out from under ponies before.

“What about you, Applejack?”

The pony in question had been too deep in thought to catch what they’d been talking about and she quickly snapped to attention, feeling her cheeks heat up at the five pairs of eyes on her. She put down the menu and cleared her throat before speaking, “I’m sorry, what?”

Twilight smirked and rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “Iwas saying that I was curious about who our waiter would be,” she said.

“Yeah!” Pinkie chirped with a giggle. “And Rarity asked if we thought it’d be the super cutie stallion right there,” she said, pointing over AJ’s head.

Applejack followed Pinkie’s hoof and twisted her neck to see who they were talking about. Sure enough, there was a waiter donning a white cotton apron and holding an empty tray in a pale orange aura as he chatted with the ponies occupying the table across from them. He was cute, with his nutmeg coat and teal hair pulled into a small stallion-bun on top of his head and bright blue eyes. Yeah, definitely cute but not exactly AJ’s type. He didn’t have the bookworm air about him that she’d come to appreciate.

She looked back straight across from her to see Rainbow Dash with a bored look on her face. AJ huffed. “He’s okay. Not quite my type,” she said with a small smile at Rainbow Dash, who returned it. At Pinkie’s next words, however, both smiles fell.

“He’s definitely mine!” The pink mare giggled. Rainbow’s scowl went unnoticed by everypony except AJ.

“Pinkie Pie! Must you say that so loudly?” Rarity chided. Her eyes were narrowed but her voice was light and bubbling with laughter. Even Fluttershy was in a fit, the soft giggles muffled by her hoof, but AJ couldn’t keep the frown from forming on her face. She wanted to tell Dash that, yeah, Pinkie thought the guy was cute, but that didn’t prove anything. Heck, AJ didn’t consider herself to be on one side of the spectrum. Who knew where a pony like Pinkie Pie would be considered.

Wouldn’t surprise me one bit if Pinkie went off the spectrum altogether and invented her own, Applejack thought to herself.

“And what about you, Rainbow Dash?” Rarity asked with a quirked eyebrow.

Applejack held her breath as Dash barely spared the waiter a glance before shrugging and looking at the menu laid flat at her hooves. “He’s ‘aight,” she decided as she turned the menu over.

Twilight hummed thoughtfully and drew in breath to speak, only to be interrupted as Mr. Cute-Waiter-Guy himself swaggered his way to the table, a notepad and pencil levitating nearby. Rarity batted her eyelashes while Pinkie gave a friendly wave.

“Good afternoon, ladies,” he greeted in a deep, gravelly voice that caused Fluttershy to bury herself behind her mane. AJ grimaced. Yeah… definitely not my type. She bit her tongue as he continued.

“My name is Roman, and I’ll be taking care of you today,” he introduced himself.

“He certainly will,” Twilight muttered to Applejack under her breath, who rolled her eyes once again. The last thing her group of friends needed was another love-sick pony within their midst.

Like Twi would really fall for that guy anyway, she thought with a smirk.

“Can I start you ladies off with some drinks?”

Applejack went with iced tea (sweet, of course).

Rarity and Fluttershy opted for water.

Twilight chose tea as well (but hot and unsweet, that weirdo).

Pinkie Pie couldn’t choose between sarsparilla and strawberry lemonade so, naturally, she ordered both.

Rainbow Dash was the only pony who hadn’t chosen her drink, only looking up when Pinkie Pie gave her a nudge. The other mare looked up at Roman, who gave her a smile so flirtatious that it could have knocked Queen Chrysalis herself out of Equestria for the second time. Applejack gave Rainbow Dash a sympathetic look. Poor girl just can’t catch a break.

“And you, my dear?” Roman asked. Pinkie’s smile fell at that and Applejack picked the menu up and pressed it into her face whilst sliding down in her chair, ignoring Twilight’s confused glance. Applejack had stifled so many sighs and bitten her tongue so many times at this luncheon alone to last a lifetime. And we ain’t even ordered yet.

“Oh, brother,” Applejack heard Rainbow mutter. “Just lemonade, please.”

“Right away,” came Roman’s reply, followed by his hoofsteps that faded as he left.

Applejack put the menu down just in time to see Fluttershy give Rainbow Dash a grin. “Oh my, I think he likes you.”

“Ugh,” Rainbow groaned, her chair scraping the ground as she got to her hooves. “I need to use the restroom.”

“Er, me too,” Applejack said, standing as well. “Be right back,” she said to the others before following Rainbow Dash out of the patio and into the restaurant. As they made their way through the maze of tables and hurrying staff of waiters and waitresses, Applejack found herself wishing she were back outside on the patio listening to her friends gossip; but there was a greater task at hoof at the moment.

Upon pushing open the door to the mares’ room, AJ sighed as Dash made her way to the sink. “When are you gonna tell ‘em, Dash?”

“Shut up!” Rainbow cried, looking about in a panic. AJ watched as the Pegasus peeked between the stall doors and the tile floor with bated breath. When she straightened back up, she fixed her friend with a glare and turned back to the sink. “You’re lucky nopony was in here just now,” she retorted as she turned on the water.

“And why is that?” Applejack asked. She could see Rainbow fighting back frustration in the mirror that hung above the sink. Applejack grimaced as she noticed it sway, just from the power of water hitting the bottom of the sink.

“Um, hello?” Rainbow retorted. She turned off the water and looked at Applejack in the mirror. She used a hoof to gesture to herself. “Did you forget I’m a Wonderbolt? If word about… this were to get out it could get very messy, and I doubt our publicist is gonna wanna deal with that.”

Deciding Rainbow Dash had a point, AJ gave a nod. “Yeah, I s’pose you’re right. Sorry,” she lamented. “But really, Dash, when?”

“When… when the time is right.”

“And when will that be?”

“Um…” Dash hummed as she moved away from the sink. “Never? Yeah, hopefully never.”

“Dash, c’mon now.”

“Well, what am I supposed to do?!” Rainbow Dash asked, her voice cracking.

“Oh, I dunno Dash, maybe trust our friends?” Applejack shot back. “They love you, sugarcube, they ain’t gonna care about which way your door swings. Especially Pinkie.”

“Oh?” Dash asked skeptically. “And how do you know?”

“Because ain’t it obvious that she’s head-over-hooves for ya?”

The silence that followed Applejack’s question was nearly earth-shattering. For a moment that could have lasted a thousand moons or a single heartbeat, emerald met magenta as the two mares stared each other down, Rainbow’s prismatic tail twitching behind her. Finally, the silence was broken as the fire died from Rainbow Dash’s eyes.

“AJ, it’s Pinkie Pie. She loves everypony.”

“No! Well, yes, but it’s different with you,” Applejack plead.

“How so?”

“Well… th-the hugs, the cheek-kisses, the huge birthday… parties…” Applejack trailed off.

Rainbow didn’t look impressed. “You just listed off things she does for literally everypony she knows. You realize that right?”

“Yes,” Applejack groaned in annoyance. “Yes, I realize that but…” she sighed and took a deep breath before starting over. “Aside from the Pinkie thing, I still think you should tell the others. They won’t think any different of ya,” she assured, chancing a smile.

To the farmer’s surprise, Rainbow Dash gave a dry, humorless huff of laughter. “Oh sure, have me come out to them and pave the way for you!”

“Say what?”

“You just want me to test the waters before you come out and make a move on Twilight!”

Applejack’s entire train-of-thought came to a screeching halt as she took in her friend’s words. She looked at Rainbow Dash for a long moment before scrunching up her nose and snorting as she stifled a loud guffaw.

Rainbow glared. “What’s so funny?”

Applejack couldn’t hold it in, letting the yelp of laughter spew from her lips and echo in the bathroom. “Rainbow you… what?! Me? And Twilight? Hahaha!”

Rainbow Dash huffed and looked away from the giggling mare. “Whatever,” she said under her breath.

“Hehe, Dash. No. It’s true I’m not ‘straight’ or whatever, but everypony’s on a spectrum. But c’mon, me and Twi? Nah.”

“Why not?”

“Hm?”

Now it was Rainbow’s turn to smirk. “Nothing. Now look… let’s make a deal.”

“Alright…”

Rainbow Dash led the way out of the restroom, signalling for Applejack to stay in the empty corridor leading out to the main dining hall of the restaurant. Her eyes were sparking with nervousness, which normally would have concerned Applejack. But there was also dangerous mischief swirling in the depths of her friend’s gaze, and that worried Applejack far more.

“I’ll come out to the others.”

“Good, I think--”

“And you’re gonna help me.”

“Come again?”

“You heard me,” Rainbow Dash replied. “You want me to come out to them? Fine. But you’re coming along for the ride, AJ.”

Applejack was never one to abandon a friend in need, but she couldn’t help but push Dash a bit more. “And if I refuse?”

“You get to watch as I awkwardly make conversation with them and avoid eye contact with Pinkie for an indefinite amount of time.”

Well, shoot. She got her there. A indefinite amount of time of watching Rainbow Dash stumble through the closet? Applejack sighed. “Deal.”

“Seal the deal, AJ.”

“We’re about to go back to the table and eat, Dash.”

“Seal. The. Deal.”

“Oh for the love of-- fine,” Applejack grumbled. She could have wiped that smug look off of Rainbow Dash’s face as she raised a hoof and spat onto it before holding it out to the other mare, who looked at the offer for a moment before wiggling her nose and scoffing.

“Nah.”

“What?!”

“We’re about to eat, AJ,” Rainbow Dash said over her shoulder as she walked out of the corridor. “Better go back in there and wash your hooves!”

Applejack stared, dumbfounded, at the entrance to the corridor where her friend had disappeared before scowling down at her soiled hoof. As she hobbled back into the bathroom and over to the sink on three legs, she groaned. She could already feel a headache coming on, and hardly anything had happened!

“Well,” Applejack said aloud to the empty bathroom as she scrubbed her hooves. “At least I won...sorta. She’s gonna come out to the others and we can get past this once and for all. No more hidin’.” She nodded at her reflection in the mirror and shut off the water before drying her hooves and pushing her way out once more, feeling more confident heading back to her friends than she did upon leaving them.

When she rejoined her friends on the patio, she saw that her tea was there waiting for her, the condensation dripping down the glass in large droplets as the ice melted under Celestia’s sun. Rainbow Dash looked up from her lemonade to give Applejack a devious smile, which quickly disappeared as the other mare mouthed the words, “you owe me”. With her own self-satisfied smirk, Applejack took her seat across from her friend, allowing her eyes to scan the menu once more, nothing really catching her eye. With an annoyed grunt, she set the menu down and looked to her friends.

“What are y’all gettin’?”

Rarity raised her chin as she answered. “While I can't speak for the others, I have decided on a lovely watercress sandwich.”

“Uh huh. Fluttershy?”

The pastel pegasus was silent for a short moment. “Well, um, I was thinking of just some seaweed salad.”

Applejack wrinkled her nose at that. I hate seaweed.

Twilight put a hoof on her shoulder to get her attention and the earth pony gladly obliged, facing her friend with a smile as a signal to go ahead and speak.

“I went for a fruit salad,” the Princess said. She smirked at Applejack and winked. “And don't worry, there's no seaweed.”

Applejack chuckled and gave a nod. “Fruit salad it is, then.”

As if her decision had summoned him, Roman appeared then, notepad levitating within reach once more. He took their orders dutifully, giving a smile and a hum as Rainbow Dash ordered her carrot soup and making the mare squirm uncomfortably. As he took up their menus, Applejack caught his eye and fixed him with a smoldering stare, summoning her inner Granny Smith (the old mare knew her way around a curse). She celebrated silently when the unicorn seemed to crumble just before he turned away with his ears flopped. Fortunately none of the other girls seemed to notice, as the topic of conversation had changed again.

“... I don't know, Rarity,” Fluttershy was saying. “I just don't see the use in going to the banquet if I already know most of the ponies in town.”

“Exactly, darling!” Rarity exclaimed, going to levitate her water. She gestured to Town Hall, which could be seen from the restaurant patio. “You know most of the ponies, not all. The banquet is for meeting ponies you don't know. It's for making and creating new friendships, or rekindling old ones that have faded away!”

“Come on, Fluttershy, it'll be fun! I'm going, “ Pinkie chirped.

Twilight exchanged an amused glance with Applejack, who rolled her eyes. They both knew Pinkie would go (it was a party, after all) but they decided to converse about it anyway.

“Of course,” Twilight began, “you hardly know anypony in town, Pinkie.”

As expected, Pinkie turned her blue eyes on the alicorn, who couldn't keep the grin off of her face. Applejack couldn't blame her; messing with Pinkie was too fun sometimes. So fun, in fact…

“Yeah,” Applejack added. “I bet you couldn't look out there and recognize five ponies,” she challenged, sweeping a hoof to the street next to them. There weren't many ponies out at the moment, most of them being at work or school.

Pinkie stood from her seat and placed her hooves on the table, narrowing her eyes at Twilight and Applejack. She paid no attention to Applejack’s smile or how Twilight was about to erupt into a fit of laughter, using Applejack’s mane to stifle her giggles. Rainbow was staring up at Pinkie with wide eyes and a grin.

The table was silent for a long moment. Then, “Is that a challenge?”

As Pinkie began rattling off names, Applejack looked back to Rainbow Dash. The pegasus’ magenta gaze was fixed on Pinkie, the warmth in her eyes unmistakeable and unbreakable. Applejack stifled a sigh as she realized that Rainbow wasn’t just crushing, but head-over-hooves.

What have I gotten myself into?

Oh, the Irony

Celestia’s sun was well on its way into the west when the six mares finally parted ways. The bill had been paid, plates has been cleared, and ponies had been scolded by Rarity for belching too loudly (ponies in question being Pinkie and Applejack). It had proven to be a delightful lunch for the six friends and had certainly calmed a few nerves.

Ponyville had begun to bustle since Tirek’s defeat, tourists coming from all over to see where the dark god had been defeated.Those who worked in the entrepreneur business, such as Rarity and Pinkie Pie, were busy making their merchandise appealing to the visitors. Ponies like Fluttershy who tended to keeping the town itself appealing were this way and that, trying to pay attention to everypony at once. Applejack was in the middle of these two categories. Her farm was responsible for Ponyville’s main food supply. From apples (of course) and corn to milk and eggs. She needed to make sure her products sold to keep her family fed and to keep the town happy, and the new attention to the town was definitely beginning to wear on her. Still, busy was good for the finances and well worth some sleep deprivation. At least, that’s what she told herself.

Pinkie Pie caught up to Applejack on her way out of the restaurant after giving Rainbow Dash a goodbye-hug and the two walked side-by-side in a comfortable silence until Applejack realized that they were heading toward Sweet Apple Acres and away from Ponyville.

“Goin’ my way, Pinkie Pie?” Applejack asked with a cocked eyebrow. Something was… off. For one thing, they were able to walk in complete silence for nearly a minute; which wouldn’t be so weird on a normal occasion but this was Pinkie Pie. The other thing was Pinkie’s face. She wasn’t frowning, but there was no sign of a smile either.

Pinkie was quiet for a moment, as if thinking of her response before letting out a tiny sigh and shaking her head. “No.”

“Alright…?”

“I actually just wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh,” Applejack said. There was another beat of silence before she added, “About what?”

“What do you think about…” Pinkie trailed off and furrowed her brow in thought. “If you were to-- no.What’s your opinion on-- uh.”

“Pinkie, just say what you need to say.”

Pinkie closed her eyes and heaved another sigh. “What do think about mares who like mares?”

That… was not what I expected

She could feel Pinkie Pie’s gaze boring into her as she gathered her thoughts. She had to be careful about what she said here. Sexuality was a sensitive subject and just one wrong word could cause a lot of drama.She also barely managed to stifle a laugh that of all days Pinkie could have chosen to ask this question, she chose the day Rainbow had decided to come out.

“I think,” Applejack began, speaking slowly, “that ponies should be allowed to like whoever they want without feeling ashamed or embarrassed.”

“So… you have no problem with it?”

“No problems at all.”

“Really? You’re super duper sure?”

“Yup.”

The next moment went by in a blur for Applejack as she was knocked to the ground and found her muzzle buried in a pink neck as Pinkie Pie tackle-hugged her into the dirt road. She could feel Pinkie’s hooves encircling her tightly. She was saying something, but Applejack was too focused on trying to recapture her breath to hear.

“... just so happy to hear you say that because I’ve been so soworried about what to do!” Pinkie was saying. “I mean, you ever get into a situation where you don’t know what you’re going to do because it all just seems really really impossible? That’s me right now. Well, it was. But now that I’m talking to you it seems a teeny tiny bit not-so-impossible! And now--”

Sweet mother of Celestia-- "Pinkie Pie!”

“Yes?”

Applejack took a deep breath, desperately trying to organize her thoughts into something coherent. It was almost as if Pinkie’s rambling thoughts had infected her own. “What are you talkin’ about?”

And again came the blank stare, the look from blue eyes that never failed to make Applejack a bit uneasy. “Blank” was not a good look for Pinkie Pie. The other mare blinked as she plopped down in the gravel. It was silent save for the faint bustling of the town and Pinkie’s hesitant hooves sliding against the ground, looking anywhere but at the orange mare in front of her.

Applejack frowned.”Pinkie, what’s gotten into you? You were fine at lunch.” She sat next to her friend and wrapped what she hoped was a comforting hoof around her shoulders. “Everything okay?”

Pinkie huffed and gave Applejack a small smile. “Everything’s fine, really. It’s just… I have a problem.”

“What is it?”

“I…”

“Yeah?”

“Well… what do you think Rainbow Dash’s opinion is on mares who like other mares?”

System crash…
Error in thought management
Rebooting… 1… 2… 3…

“Wh...what?”
“Do you think she’s okay with it?” Pinkie asked, cheeks bright red. “I mean, she doesn’t really seem like a pony who would have a problem with it but you never know, y’know?”

“Have a problem with-- what?!” Applejack jumped to her hooves. “Rainbow Dash would be the last pony in Equestria to have a problem with… that."

“Really?” Pinkie asked. “How do you know?”

“Because, she’s--”

”Applejack!” Rainbow Dash’s voice cracked as she whipped around, her ears flat and eyes wide. “Wh-what are you doing here?”

Applejack cocked an eyebrow. “It’s my farm…?”

“Ugh!”

“Were you talkin’ to yourself, sugarcube?”

“Wha-- no! M-maybe?”

“Dash…Don’t lie to me.”

Rainbow stood her ground for a long moment longer before sighing and folding her wings. “How...how much did you hear?”

“Enough to know that you’re hidin’ who you are,” Applejack replied, striding toward her distraught friend. “Although I had kinda guessed before.”

“You can’t tell anypony about this, okay?”

“But, Dash--”

“I’m serious, Applejack! I know what you’re gonna say, but this is just something I need you to do. Please. I need you to Pinkie Promise.”

.... crap.

“Uh, because she’s a… nice pony!” Applejack decided.

Pinkie Pie looked like she was about to argue, so Applejack cut her off before she could begin: “And nice ponies don’t judge other ponies for things like that.”

“Really?”

“Of course, sugarcube,” Applejack assured her. "Rainbow Dash can be crude and a bit... insensitive at times, but she's not judgemental. She would be the last pony to have a problem with that."

"I know, I know!" Pinkie whined with a small hoof stomp. " I just can't stop thinking about how she would react if she found out that I... well..."

Applejack already knew the answer, but she asked anyway. It wasn't about being right, it was about comforting her friend.

"Pinkie Pie?"

Pinkie spared a nervous glance, but said nothing. Applejack took it as permission to continue.

"Do you like mares, sugarcube?"

Pinkie Pie hummed in thought. "Yes. Well, no. But yes."

"Beg pardon?"

Pinkie Pie bounced to her hooves. "Well, I don't like just mares, I like everypony! Everypony is cute and attractive and romantic in their own way! How can I like just one or the other?" Pinkie blew a raspberry. "Booooring.

Applejack chuckled and ruffled her curly locks, happy to see Pinkie more upbeat. "Well, I think that's great sugarcube. Now why don't y--"

"BUT DON'T TELL ANYPONY!"

"What?!" Applejack exclaimed. "Why keep it a secret?"

"Because maybe you're okay with it, but other ponies might not be! So you have to keep it a secret!"

"B--"

"Promise!"

"I--"

"No!" Pinkie said, cupping Applejack's cheeks with her hooves and pressing their noses together. "Pinkie. Promise."

Applejack's head felt like it was about to explode. This day was just getting more weird as it went on, yet Pinkie Pie was serious. Blue eyes narrowed and hooves just on the verge of shaking with anxiety where they held Applejack's face, Pinkie Pie was very serious about this. What else could she do?

With a small sigh, Applejack leaned away from Pinkie Pie.

"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," she sighed as she performed the appropriate movements.

"Good!"

"But..." Applejack drawled, not quite ready to accept the end of this conversation just yet. "I still think you should be honest with others, Pinkie."

Pinkie groaned, rolling her eyes before dropping her head back before slamming it her face into the dirt with a painful thud. Applejack almost felt concern for her. Almost.

This was Pinkie, after all.

"I thought you might say that," Pinkie grumbled, her voice muffled by the dirt.

"It's in my nature," Applejack retorted with a smirk.

After yanking her face out of the ground, Pinkie Pie looked at Applejack again with a pout. Applejack cocked an eyebrow, unphased by the same puppy-dog face that Applebloom had tried so many times.

"You... really think they'll take it alright?" Pinkie asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Applejack's annoyance melted at that and she placed a hoof on her friend's shoulder. "Sugarcube, I can't speak for everypony. But I will tell you that our friends love you very much. They ain't gonna care about who you fancy."

"But what if they do?"

"Then... Then maybe they ain't ponies you wanna be friends with anyway."

Ouch. It hurt Applejack to say as much as it seemed to hurt Pinkie to hear. Her friend's ears dropped and eyes were downcast. As harsh as it was, Applejack firmly believed what she said. If, say, Twilight were to be disgusted with Pinkie Pie or Rainbow Dash's lifestyles, would they feel comfortable around her anymore? Hay, would Applejack feel comfortable around her? Would they even be able to see Twilight the same after that?

Well... no. No, no, and no. But that wouldn't happen.

" O' course it's your decision," Applejack broke the silence. "Whether you do it today or in ten years, it doesn't matter. But I think doin' it and gettin' it over with will take a lot of stress off of you."

It was halfway through her spiel that Applejack remembered that she was in no way qualified to be giving this kind of advice, but she was now the sole confidant of not one, but two closeted friends. Officially qualified for this? No, but she didn't have much of a choice. She couldn't just leave her friends lost in the dark. She was like...

A gay magnet. Or something.

Pinkie Pie was quiet for a moment before giving a solid nod and salute. "You're right, Applejack. I'll do it today, even! The sooner the better!"

"Good!" Applejack exclaimed with a smile.

"But I can't do it alone!"

"Pardon?"

How did she get herself roped into this?

"Alright, Applejack. I'm ready to come out."

"Okie Dokie Lokie! Applejack, one of the greatest friends of all time, has agreed to help me come out!"

Applejack bit the inside of her cheek to make sure she wasn't dreaming.

"First, I... I think I should tell Fluttershy. I've known her the longest."

Ooh! Who first, who first? How about... oh! Fluttershy! She's a good first choice. She's not a meanie."

... Nightmare. Definitely a nightmare.

"What do you think, AJ? Meet at Fluttershy's at 2?"

"3 o'clock! That will be a good time to visit Fluttershy. She shouldn't be too busy, right?"

Two of her closest friends. Both in the closet and ready to come out, both in love with and terrified of each other, both looking to Applejack to be there when they need her most. Today.

"Remember Applejack, we just play it cool. Let me do the talking."

"Should I write out all the things I say? Make a list? Oh wow, I sound like Twilight, haha!"

Two secrets that she had the responsibility of keeping.

"I've got this... we've got this, AJ. See you in an hour!"

"Ooh, I'm so nervous-cited! See you in a couple of hours, Applejack!"

... Crap.