A problem that you CAN'T squash

I woke up.

Pain.

I sat up.

More pain.

I reached over, and grabbed a little orange bottle on the nightstand nest to me and popped the top. I tilted the bottle up to my mouth took 3 pills into my mouth. I gagged a bit at the bitter taste, and swallowed hard a few time, trying to get the medication down my throat.

Eventually, they worked themselves out, and I got up, relieved that the pain throughout my whole body was fading away, to nothing but a pleasant tingle. I reached down and grabbed my shirt, putting it on lazily, ignoring the wrinkles in it. I reached down to grab my pants, but a small squeaking sound caught my attention. I turned around, seeing the little creature on my open it's mouth to let out another, may I say, adorable squeak.

Any normal person (or pony) would have jumped out of their skin when seeing the insect-like creature in their room, much less on their bed.

But not me.

"Shh, daddy's here." I said gently, reaching down and scooping up the small thing into my hand. I still didn't understand what I was holding, but I did know that I had made the right decision to help it. It seemed strange really. I had always considered myself a ''Hard-ass" Unable and unwilling to help anybody but myself.

Whelp, I was wrong by a mile. or two...

I guess it was the opportunity that opened me up to the idea. I never expected that in my life someone would dump a baby on me, and tell me to take care of it, I always thought that shit happened to orphanages and well-off families, not a human mercenary who was (formerly) motivated by money and what it could buy.

I gave the little thing a gentle tap on the nose, making it chirp in delight. I knew very little about babies, but I think I was doing well so far.

It has been about a week since I started taking care of this thing, and Its actually very easy. To start, I don't need to feed it. I found this weird, but didn't question it. Secondly, there were holes in its legs, like, ALL THE WAY THROUGH. I noticed these on maybe the third day. And I about lost my shit. I swear to God I thought he had some Necrosis or Leprosy thing going down with him. But it wasn't uncomfortable or upset, so I never really pursued the situation. As long as it was happy, I couldn't care less.

It...

I did NOT like calling it that, but that was my final problem. The little guy had no junk. I couldn't tell if it was a male or female. So I called it, well, 'it'. I did plan on picking a name soon, something unique and interesting, not Bob or some dumb-ass shit like that. I still hadn't decided yet, but I had some good ideas...

The baby cooed quietly and nuzzled my chest, sighing happily as it fell asleep again, only after a few minutes of being awake. Damn you sleep a lot I thought to myself as I walked over to the bad and put the thing down gently, not wanting to rouse it out of its sleep.

I looked at the little thing, and I knew I needed more information on what the thing was, or just anything that could enlighten me to my most noble quest yet, If your call this noble...

It was heroic, legendary even, not noble. 'noble' sounded too...heroish, and I wasn't no hero. I had at least 3 bounties on my head from Las Pegasus for various jobs and...things I had done there. Not to mention other cities and countries around Equis.

I was no hero, but I could be, at least to this little thing. I looked out the window,noticing how high the sun was in the sky. It was almost noon. I had time to go out and visit the library or go to someplace with a WiFi hot spot. I looked back to the bed. I think he would be fine if I took him along with me. As long as I didn't go showing him around, I still had a eerie feeling that the town would probably lose their shit if I did.

I finally put on my pants and some socks and boots. I went and grabbed a steel dagger that I had bought a few months back. It wasn't special, just a wooden hilt and a 6 inch steel blade, with a tip sharp enough to chop a dragon's balls off with one swing. I picked up a small bag, and after adding a soft blanket and cutting off some parts, I had made a decent portable bed.

I picked up the baby and gently placed it inside. It cooed slightly and snuggled down deeper. I grinned a bit and gently slung the bags strap over my shoulder. I took a few steps, and was pleased to see that the bag didn't move around a lot, so the baby wouldn't be jarred around like a rock in a blender.

I went out, opening my door and looking it behind me. I was on the east side of Ponyville, and the library was a straight shot from where I was standing. The town hall had to have part of its space turned into a library, due to the first one being destroyed a few years back by a crazy centaur. The building itself wasn't that special, a tanish color with a dark red roof on it, and about 3 stories tall. It was one of the second largest building in the town, the tallest being the Castle of Friendship.

Goddamn...that name is so gay...

I began to walk to the library. I choose to keep to myself and just walk, not that anybody would talk to me anyway. I was an intimidating person to look at. I was almost 6 feet tall, 290 pounds, and a strength greater than Big McIntosh, who was one of the strongest ponies I'd ever seen. Add to my dagger, and just huge size in general, and you had a scary guy to look at.

Most ponies here were already scared of me right off the bat, considering their high-strung demeanor. But I had kinda dug myself a huge hole when I made it clear that I wasn't to be interacted with, in par with my hostile nature. I then was labeled a 'danger' and most ponies now just ignore me. Any interaction I have with one they are either scared, intimidated, or both.

Even now, as I walked, ponies gave me a wide berth. Guards raised their weapons slightly as I walked past, conversations stopped, some starred. It became silent as I walked, each pony holding their breath as I went by.

Pussies...

I made it to the town hall and walked in. There was a receptionist on a computer, and a few ponies waiting in the lobby. I walked up the the front desk, ignoring the eyes of the ponies around me as they realized who had walked in. The receptionist just looked at me with wide eyes, completely caught of guard that I had walked in. When I opened my mouth she filched a little, as if she expected a demon to come out and eat her. I rolled my eyes in annoyance. "Where is the library?" I asked as kindly as I could, really trying not to scare the already nervous pony.

She trembled slightly as she stuttered out that it was "to the left" I gave her a smile, then walked where she told me to walk. Behind me I heard a murmur, then a thump, along with a gasp and yelp. I looked behind me, and was somewhat amused to see that the pony had fainted, In a classic movie-style type of way, and was being cared for by the ponies that were in the room.

Oops I said to myself, and I hurried on to the library entrance. When I walked in, I took a look around. There was a few computers, and lots of books. So basically a normal library. I walked over to one of the computers and sat down. After a quick start up, I clicked on the web browser and typed in "Mythical Creatures".

Not the best choice, as the page then exploded with all kinds of animals that inhabited Equis, tabs showed how to catch a Hydra, or how to kill a Manticore. Not what I wanted at all. I backed out of the page and tried again. I needed something, a keyword to make the damn thing find a relateable search. I looked down at the bag, which I had set down next to my chair, which was still too small. I studied the baby closely, noting its pony-like body structure. I turned back to the screen and typed in a generic search: Bug Pony.

That seemed to work, as a few tabs showed up, some on news sites covering an attack on Canterlot some years back. The preview picture showed exactly what I was looking for. It was the same thing, only bigger and more scary. I scrolled down some more and found a tab on "Changelings" within a wiki domain.

Good enough I thought to myself as I clicked on the tab. The page was surprisingly small, with only a few details. The page said that the species that attacked Canterlot was commonly know as "Changelings" And that they work as a hive mind, almost like bees or ants. They are ruled by a queen, who is far different in size and shape than the other members of the hive. It went on to say that the Changelings were hermaphrodites, each one, including the queen, having both sex organs. This was due to their ability to transform into other creatures, and they needed this to copy any gender of their target.

There was no life span data, or name data. Only that the queen who had attacked had said she was named "Chrysalis". There was nothing else useful on the page except a warning at the bottom. In big bold letters, it stated that if any inhabitant was caught helping or aiding the Changelings or Chrysalis in any way, they would be arrested and charger with treason, and sentenced to life in prison...No exceptions.

Oh shit...

I looked down at the bag, the Changeling was still asleep, and it cooed ever so often. I shut down the computer as fast as I could and grabbed the bag. I rushed out of the library. I had to get away from here, the risk was too great. If I was caught, I'd be doomed, and God knows what they would do to the Changeling...

I was at the doorway and opened it up. Almost there I thought to myself as I walked out of the building.

A loud Zap rang through the air, and before I could react, I felt something along the lines of a lightning bolt hit my chest, I sent me flying into the street. It knocked all the wind out of my lungs, and I lay there gasping for a moment. I coughed, and reached for my dagger, but a hoof stomped down on my hand, making me yelp in pain. I looked up, meeting the eyes of a guard pony. He was in golden armor, and not the normal bronze of the local Ponyville guard.

I then felt my bag get magically ripped off my body. I turned to took, and saw a few more guards with it, looking inside. Some of theirs eyes widened, others just snarled at the Changeling on the on inside. I began to struggle violently, actually managing to get up and get the guard off of me. I charged the group, trying my hardest to protect the Changeling. I was mid-dive when I was stopped by magic. A golden aura held me in midair. I grunted and struggled, but I couldn't get out. I couldn't even talk.

"Is he harmed?" a voice asked calmly. It was female, and I recognized it immediately.

Shit...

A guard nearby answered "No your majesty, he nor the Changeling are harmed, what do you want us to do?"

I heard footsteps behind me, going around my left side. I was then face to face with Princess Celestia herself. She was intimidating, easily a foot higher than me, and very larger. Not fat, but just body size she was far bigger than most other ponies. Celestia looked me in the eye, a small smirk on her face.

"Take Stéphane and send him to the castle dungeon until I can speak with him. As for the Changeling, put it in an isolation room away from our friend here, at least until I can get some answers from him."

Celestia then turned and looked at the guards. "Is that clear?" she asked calmly.

"YES YOUR MAJESTY!" they all shouted in unison. She then turned back to me and sighed. Without a word, her horn glowed, and I felt my mind began to fog, and I became drowsy. It wasn't long before I passed out, and was led away into custody.