Newt Gingrich's Adventures in Ponyville
Newt Gingrich was going about his daily business of being such a nice guy defending America from all of the evil hippies and people that make sense when suddenly he was transportated to the magical land of Equestria. This felt weird to Newt Gingrich because everything was so colorful and happy looking. Then he saw a purple pony that was a unicorn with a baby dragon with a piece of paper and asked them where he was.
“WHERE AM I?” Said Newt Gingrich
“Youre in ponyville” said the purple pony unicorn.
“OH, IVE NEVER BEEN HERE BEFORE.” Said Newt Gingrich, “IS IT IN AMERICA?”
“No,” said the pony, “What is America?”
“AMERICA IS THE GREATEST CCOUNTRY IN THE WORLD, AND IT HAS HUMANS IN IT AND NOT PONIES”
“Ok,” she said “Why are you here?”
“I think your princess needs me” Said Newt Gingrich
“I know the princess, but she didn’t say anything about needing somepony” said Twilight.
“Well that’s cause im not a pony!” Said Newt Gingrich
“Ok, ill take you to her” Said Twilight
“Ok, can I ride you there? Said Newt Gingrich
“Sure” Said Twilight
sO Newt Gingrich rode Twilight to canterlot and on the way there they met pinkie who was collecting blueberries with Applejack and rarity who were also on there way to canterlot because they also had to meet with the princess of equestrian named celestia who was very nice and caring. So they went further and further. Newt gingrich talked a lot about America and how it was amazing and then they saw fluttershy who was looking for a bunny but she found it and was off to ponyville but decided to go with Newt Gingrich because it was fun but she didn’t say much because she was shy. So them went walking and walking till the saw rainbow dash who was with the wonderbolts because she was a wondebolt now and got the blue uniform and was hanging out with spitfire and soarin because they were her friends now and she decided tto go the her friends and saw newt gingrich who was still riding twilight and asked who he was and he said he was newt gingrich and he was going to the princess so she went along to with soarin and spitfire coming tto because they were friends with everybody. They walked more and stopped when they saw that applebloom got her cutie mark that was an apple shaped as a heart and they saw that scootaloo and sweetie bell were sad because the didn’t have their cutiemarks but then they got them and they where amazing too. They were a butterfly and a star for them and they were happy and everyone was happy and newt gingrich was happy so they kept going and they saw that discord had broken out and that made everyone scared but newt gingrich was mad and he shot discord and he died. Everyone was happy again and he taught them about guns. Then they saw big mac but he didn’t say anything so he walked with fluttershy because they were getting married tomorrow and newt gingrich was invited and that made him happy. All of a sudden the tardis showed up and doctor whooves said that they could take a shortcut and stop walking so they went into the tardis and everyone was amazed that it was bigger on the inside. Newt gingrich got oaf of twilight because the tardis was here and he didn’t need to walk more. So the went and they saw derpy who said silly stuff and newt gingrich laughed and the teleported to the castle iinfront of the princess and she thanked them for coming. Newt gingrich was happy to meet her.
“Im glad you came because nightmare moon is back and everyone gasped. Unfortunately guns don’t work on nightmare moon because luna would die too so newt gingrich had to think of what to do. He thought for a long time until he had an idea.
