Switcheroo!?

by Skijarama

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Romance, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Profanity, Random, Discord, Alternate Universe, Changelings
Length: 5755

When Discord and Discord Dos decide to swap the places of alternate universe versions of Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash, things can only get... uh, kinky, apparently.

(Crossover between Little Glimpses and Change)

Discord calls upon a counterpart of himself from another world to cause some chaos by switching the places of Princess Twilight Sparkle the changeling and Princess Rainbow Dash, each one from different worlds.

Naturally, the universe explodes.

(This story is a 'sequel' to an April Fools chapter posted in the stories Bug in The Herd and Change: Queen of the Hive. It is also a part of the Idiocyverse and contains numerous jokes built up within this bizarre set of things. Reading the other entries of the Idiocyverse, while not required to retain your sanity, is advised to get many of the jokes and references contained within these words.)

Published 2018-01-02 23:50:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-01-02 23:50:07 UTC

Prologue - Discord & Dos

“Oh my god it’s come full circle…”

-Skijaramaz

“It always comes back to Discord…”

-Tom117z

“It’s because I’m me.”

-Love, Discord and Discord Dos

“F*CK YOU, DISCORDS!”

-Skijaramaz

“Oh, there you are!” Discord Dos proclaimed with a grin as Discord entered his house with a flourish. He stood, marched over to his counterpart, and the two bumped their chests together in the ultimate sign of broship.

“I would never say no to meeting with the only other most beautiful creature in the omniverse!” Discord replied with a grin.

“Indeed. Our faces truly are the most beautiful things in all creations.”

“Rarity agreed, at least for a while.”

Discord Dos then clapped his claws (and paw) together. “Anyway, there is a reason I called you here besides horsing around and chatting up the old times,” he glanced over his shoulder at a photo album with a mouth and eyes labeled ‘old times.’ ‘Shoo.”

“Aww,” the old times wined before fluttering off to do something else.

“Oh? What do you have in mind, my friend?” Discord asked, conjuring a glass of purple juice of some description.

“Remember that one time?”

“Oh, yeah, I remember that one time.”

A small bubble appeared above Discord Dos’s head, convenient for all those who had no idea what Discord was talking about…

“Oh, of course! The nice one shall, henceforth, be known as Chryssi!”

“Which one is the nice one?”

“Why does that drone look like the Princess of Friendship?” Chrysalis demanded with more anger in her voice, pointing at a now very confused Princess Twilight Sparkle just as the young changeling arrived.

‘What!?” Chryssi asked. ‘That’s my daughter you cu-”

“There we go.”

“There. All caught up?” Discord Dos asked nobody in particular, crossing his arms more than a little smugly.

“Indeed we are,” Discord replied with a smile and nod. “So, what is the plan you have? What grand bit of chaos and mischief are we to perform this time?”

“While we could take over the world, like Gummy and Boulder keep trying to do, I have a different plan. Similar in premise to when we chucked Chrysalis and Tone Shift into my world and watched all of that madness occur.”

“Do tell…”

Discord Dos conjured up a bubble in which they could see a different world from either of theirs. “You see, in this world, that darling little ball of ego, Rainbow Dash, was adopted by Princess Celestia as a filly. She currently lives with Twilight Sparkle in the Golden Oaks. The two are like sisters,” he turned a smile on his doppleganger. “I would like for us to perform a switcheroo, if you will.”

Discord grinned eagerly, then paused and blinked. “As much as I do enjoy messing with reality itself, shouldn’t you be calling upon, you know, the Discord in that world instead of me? Who knows what I’m missing out on with Fluttershy!”

“Oh, we can rewind time, no big deal,” Discord Dos waved off the complaint.

“True.”

“But as it is, the Discord of this world is still stoned during the time period we want, so he won’t be of any help to us,” Discord Dos nodded to Discord. “Which is where you come in. I would like for you to go in there and pluck Princess Rainbow Dash from the library, and deposit her where the Twilight Sparkle in my world is standing. At the same time, I will put buggy Twilight where Princess Rainbow Dash was, effectively just swapping their places.”

Discord grinned. “I like the way you think.”

Discord Dos beamed at the praise, his chest puffing up like a balloon until it popped, his normal chest being revealed to have just been hiding beneath. “I am amazing.”

“Just to clarify one thing,” Discord commented, humming in consideration. “This is bug-Twi as a Princess, right? Or are we going full Queenie?”

Discord Dos snorted. “Better make it Princess Twilight. Queen Twilight is too much of a hard-ass for this to be funny. Too much like her mother.”

“Well, her mother did-”

“Ah ah ah, stop right there,” Discord Dos interrupted, Discord’s mouth sealing shut. “No spoilers now.”

Discord grunted. “Mmph.”

“So… shall we begin?” Discord Dos said slowly, tapping the tips of his fingers together.

“Mm-hmm!” Discord hmphed eagerly, raising his claws in preparation.

“Three…”

“Oomph…”

“One!”

Snap.

Change The Rainbow

“Twilight, did you eat my sandwich?” Rainbow asked quizzically, looking at her remarkably empty breakfast plate before shooting an irked glare at the innocent lavender bookworm.

“Nnope,” Twilight chirped innocently while pulling her book closer to her face.

Rainbow grimaced before looking down at her plate, despondent. Then her grin grew again. “Y’know, my sandwiches are high in carbs, Twilight.”

“So?” Twilight raised an eyebrow while peering past her book at the now foully smirking Rainbow Dash.

“Well, you kinda sit around reading books all day. My sandwich is probably going to make-” a flash of light interrupted Rainbow’s sentence. When the flash was gone, Rainbow had gone with it. In her place was a very confused looking… uh… insect thing that looked remarkably like Twilight.

“...What?” The bug asked.

“You FAT!” Rainbow finished her sentence while pointing a hoof forward mockingly. She then stopped when she realized she was no longer sitting in the library. Instead of pointing her hoof at the adorkable book horse she so loved to tease, she was instead pointing a hoof at a rather perplexed… thing that looked oddly offended by that comment.

Rainbow Dash appeared to be sitting at a table in some kind of restaurant, or maybe a cafe? Whatever the case, a chessboard sat between the wide-eyed pegasus and the equally wide-eyed bug creature thingy. A large cavernous space sat outside the window, and somehow Rainbow Dash had wound up on the side of the board that was winning the game.

“...Rainbow Dash…?” the giant bug-pony-thing muttered in apparent confusion.

“GWAH!?” Rainbow Dash blurted out, immediately opening her wings and taking to the air.

And getting a nasty bump on colliding into a very solid ceiling.

The bug just watched Rainbow Dash fall back to the ground, her perplexed expression never leaving for a moment. “OK, as amusing as this is… Twilight, you can stop whatever prank you’re playing now.”

“What in Mom’s name are you!?” Rainbow shouted out, though her alarm seemed to be slowly turning into anger. “Did you foalnap me? Where is Twilight? I’ll tell Mom on you!”

“How childish,” the big bug deadpanned. “Seriously, you can both stop it now. And stop acting like you don’t know who I am, it’s really annoying.”

“I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE!” Rainbow yelled, throwing her forelegs wide in exasperation. “WHERE AM I?!”

Any other patrons of the cafe were quickly vacating, all of them also very insect-like in appearance. They cast nervous glances towards the bug and Rainbow, soon leaving the two of them alone.

The bug seemed to concentrate for a moment, her eyes narrowing and her head tilting slightly, almost as if she were having some kind of internal conversation. And then her eyes widened again, but thirty percent more than before.

“Why thirty percent? The joke is twenty,” Discord remarked with a frown.

“Because I like to go one step beyond…” Discord Dos commented cheekily.

A small bit of panic seemed to be setting in upon the thing at the table, and her agitation did little to help Rainbow Dash’s ease return.

“I can’t find her…” the bug muttered, and then suddenly shot up from the table and crossed the distance between her and Rainbow Dash. “WHY CAN’T I HEAR HER!?”

“...Uh, hear who… weird… sharp-toothed bug thing?” Rainbow asked, suppressing the urge to gulp at the sight of all those fangs.

“Twilight Sparkle! My daughter! WHO ELSE YOU RAINBOW HAIRED TURKEY!?”

“I’m not a turkey, you’re a chicken,” Rainbow deadpanned, though immediately regretted it as the bug’s eye twitched. “And I mean… wait… Did you just say Twilight was your daughter?”

“Well, of course. Or did you forget EVERYTHING that has happened in the past year?” the bug exclaimed in increasing exasperation.

“The last year?” Rainbow raised an eyebrow. “In the last year I moved to Ponyville with Twilight from Canterlot, got the elements and now I work as a volunteer with the weather teams.”

She blinked. “Volunteer?”

“Well, yeah. Apparently it’s not exactly proper protocol for royalty to have a commoner’s job,” Rainbow pouted. “It sucks, really.”

Something seemed to be dangerously close to fizzing out in the bug’s brain. “...Royalty. You? The egocentric pegasus who apparently represents loyalty?”

Rainbow huffed. “Egocentric? ...Yeah, I guess,” she conceded before frowning. “Why are you so surprised? This has been a thing for, like, eight years now. Have you been living under a rock this whole time?” she then looked up at the roof, which was very rocky indeed. “Yeah… looks like it.”

“It’s a complex series of caverns making up a hive structure!” the bug shot back. “And in the last eight years that has NOT happened. You and Twilight only met AT Ponyville and we met when I attacked Canterlot with a legion of drones!”

“Uh… you what now?” Rainbow asked, taking a step back. “I’m pretty sure I’d remember a siege on where I live. Mom would never shut up about it if something like that happened.”

The bug simply did not seem to know what to make of any of what Rainbow Dash said, only for a small tilt of her head to suggest the proverbial light bulb had lit.

“Maybe I’m thinking too much of this, and this really is some stupid prank you and Twilight decided to pull on me, but…” the bug sighed. “What year is it?”

And when Rainbow Dash told her the year, the bug only seemed to be more and more resigned.

“Of course. These things ALWAYS happen to her…” she muttered. “OK, in short… You’re a year in the future. The Rainbow Dash I know is NOT royalty… thank the hive. So I must surmise you’re from an alternate cosmic timeline.”

“Uh…” Rainbow blinked while tilting her head. “OK, now I can suddenly believe you’re her bug mom.”

“Seriously, it’s like looking into a mirror to the past with my daughter…” the bug deadpanned. “Also, not a bug. Changeling. Say it with me, changeling-.”

“I’m not deaf, you know.” Rainbow snorted in offense.

“-and I am Chrysalis,” Chrysalis continued, not listening to the upstart. “Queen of the Badlands Hive, and mother to Princess Twilight Sparkle. Now, you are clearly not the Rainbow I know so let’s start again… who the fuck are you?”

Rainbow cringed. “Ew, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?”

“My mother got eaten by a dragon.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah.

“Sorry,” Rainbow rubbed the back of her head sheepishly. “Well, uh… I’m Princess Rainbow Dash, adopted daughter to Princess Celestia. Though please don’t use my title. Seriously, it makes my skin crawl.”

“Adopted?” Chrysalis said questioningly. “What? Did Windy Whistles and Bow Hothoof-”

“Yes, yes they did,” Rainbow quickly cut Chrysalis off. “No, I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah.”

“Sorry,” Chrysalis apologised, suddenly feeling like history just repeated itself.

“Deja vu,” Carduus commented over the hive.

“Are you listening in on this?” Chrysalis demanded, her face turning into an annoyed scowl.

“Er… no?” Carduus shyed.

“You’re grounded.”

“What? I’m not even related to-”

Chrysalis then shut Carduus out and returned her attention to Rainbow, who noticed the scowl on her face. “Er…”

“Forgive me, my Captain was spying on us.” Chrysalis remarked with a stern and disapproving glower directing out the window.

“Oh,” Rainbow blinked and then looked around a bit. “Okay, now that I’m not freaking out, I gotta admit… this place of yours is actually kinda cool looking. Not enough colors, though.”

“We’re changelings, if we wanted to be seen we would use colors, but we evidently do not,” Chrysalis pointed out, and then snorted. “Honestly, who could ever imagine a changeling race as colourful as ponies?”

“She has no idea,” Discord chortled.

“In both universes,” Discord Dos agreed. “Thorax and Twilight… DEATH BATTLE!”

“Does that deer-ling even happen in this one, or are you getting mixed up with my and old Tone Shift’s world, where the dimwitted stallion hangs with his darling fillyfriend?” Discord asked.

“Meh, time shall tell.”

Rainbow lifted a forehoof. “Me.”

Chrysalis cringed. “Well… clearly you don’t know us very well, yet.”

“Well, not that this hasn’t been fun…” Rainbow started, inching closer towards the door. “But I should really go home now.”

Chrysalis rolled her eyes. “If I knew how to do that, I would have punted you home the moment I laid eyes on you. I’m a Queen, I am very busy, and you are an annoyance.”

“Rude.”

“You appeared and now my little nymph is missing,” Chrysalis pointed out with a small snarl. “I GET TO BE RUDE!”

“And here I thought things had calmed down,” Rainbow muttered under her breath before shrugging. “Well, I don’t know what to tell ya. I’m just as confused as you are. So you go ahead and fume some more while I go actually do something… bye.”

And then she bolted through the door, leaving Chrysalis to stare at the exit in surprise.

And then the Changeling Queen just sighed. “Could one of the couple thousand guards in this place please glue that pegasus to the ground? I have a feeling I’ll need her…”

“If I do it, will I become un-grounded?” Carduus asked, snark clear in his voice.

“Shut up.”

Okay, this was NOT how Rainbow Dash saw this day going.

So she decided to do a mental checklist, Twilight style, of all the things that cascaded her into the position in which she found herself.

One: A simple teasing session between Twilight and her.

Two: An angry bug Queen in an alien environment in, if Chrysalis was to be believed, an alternate cosmi-whatever.

Three: Attempting to flee to the clear skies she could see above this massive hole in the ground, slamming into what turned out to be a shield covering said hole and crashing.

Four: Being tackled by a bajillion guards, and glued to the floor with some green… stuff.

Rainbow Dash was not having a good day.

She would find some way to blame Twilight though, she was certain of that.

Now she was surrounded by numerous changelings, all glaring at her and eyeing her cautiously. She would have waved sarcastically, but her legs were still kind of stuck in what she could only assume was changeling mucus. So, she just opted to stand tall and try to look as regal as she could.

Not the worst attempt Chrysalis had ever seen, but a far cry from the other royalty she had met.

The Queen in question was about to ask Rainbow something when one of her guards pinged her over the hive. “Uh, My Queen? You said you have Rainbow Dash held in the atrium, right?”

“Yes, why?”

“...Because she just walked in through the front door with the rest of the element bearers.”

“Oh shit.”

“Odd,” Discord noted. “I don’t remember the Element Bearers visiting LAST time we did this…”

“We were so focused on the Chryssie catfight that you clearly didn’t notice them,” Discord Dos explained.

“Ah. Continue.”

“Uh, uh, shit, um!” Chrysalis began to panic a little bit. “Just, uh, HIDE HER!” She pointed a hoof at Rainbow Dash.

“Wait, whaoooooOAAAAAHHH!” Rainbow began to question, though her words devolved into a panicked shout as a drone picked her up.

The drone looked around for a moment. “Uh… Where exactly?”

“I don't know, just stick her behind a tapestry or something!” Chrysalis shouted, and then paused. “Hm, that felt oddly familiar…”

Discord laughed.

The Drone nodded and then zipped over to a tapestry hanging up over a balcony. Rainbow struggled a bit, now that her legs were free, but then the drone stopped and audibly gulped. “Uh oh…”

“Huh?” Rainbow asked. Wait, no she didn't… did she? It was her voice, but she didn’t say anything. Slowly, Rainbow looked and saw, uh… herself, standing on said balcony, looking up at her. She pointed. “Nice taste in disguises, but, you can drop it for now. The real me is here.”

“Oh no…” Chrysalis groaned from the ground floor, her eyes twitching under their lids.

Rainbow stared at herself for a good long moment. “Uh… I’m not a changeling,” she finally managed. The drone simply nodded.

The other Rainbow lifted into the air, floated up to herself and looked her over. “You’re right. No changeling could possibly be able to match the perfect subtleties that is my awesome.”

“Oh my word…” Chrysalis groaned out again before starting to buzz up towards them.

Then something crashed. Everyone paused and looked around. “What was that?” the drone asked worriedly.

Both Rainbows then looked off to the side, staring dumbly at a crack appearing on the surface of the wall. “Uh…” they said in unison. “Is that new?”

“Again?” Discord wined.

“Yes, I’m afraid so.” Discord Dos pouted.

The crask then grew exponentially, revealing an odd amalgamation of… uh… energy behind it. Through this swiftly growing hole, Rainbow (the royal one) spotted a truly odd sight. She saw the interior of the golden oaks library, with a changeling version of Twilight laying on her back on a metal examination table with Pony Twilight standing over her. Both wore way-too excited grins on their face. Also, Pony Twilight was holding a pokey-stick.

“POKE ME!” Changeling Twilight proclaimed.

“POKING!” Twilight answered.

“TWILIGHT?” Everyone else cried at once, including the newly arrived rest of the group. The two Twilights looked up.

Princess Twilight blushed and waved at Chrysalis. “Hi Mom… uh, I can explain?”

“This is one fetish I didn’t need to know about,” Chrysalis muttered, facehoofing heavily.

Glimpse The Changeling

“Check,” Twilight stated smugly, much to Chrysalis’ supreme annoyance.

“How did you even do that?” she asked. “I had you cornered!”

“You should never underestimate me,” Twilight responded, her smug look not abating for even a moment. “I am, after all, the former protege of Princess Celestia, the master of chess.”

“Playing chess with your lives, in order to redeem her sister, doesn’t count.”

Twilight shrugged. “Meh, I forgave her. Friendship is magic and all that.”

“Please stop saying that,” Chrysalis deadpanned. “Who even came up with that phrase? It sounds like something for children.”

“Adults can also learn the magic of friendship,” Twilight argued. “It doesn’t have to be all explosions and-

And then there was pop and a flash, and the view of the chess board was replaced with that of an oddly familiar library. In front of her stood a very confused looking pony who looked rather like a reflection that Twilight used to know.

“...What?” Twilight asked, completely dumbfounded and slightly annoyed that it happened mid-sentence.

“What…?” her pony self added.

“What?”

“WHAT?!”

“WHAAAT?!”

“Stop. Yelling!” Spike shouted as he wandered into the main library. “What is even going on in here?”

He then saw not one, but two Twilight staring back at him. And one of them was a bug.

“Saturday, gotcha,” Spike commented, grabbing a hat and swiftly exiting the library.

The Twilights both watched him leave, and then they slowly turned their heads to look back at one another.

“...What?” they asked in unison.

“Okay, we’re back in this situation again,” Discord noted. “The same people, from different universes. We need names.”

“Well that’s easy,” Discord Dos replied. “The small plump pony is inherently cuter, so she shall be called Twily!”

“I like it! Go!”

Twily then shot forward and poked Twilight in the chest. “Wow, what are you? I mean, you look like me and sound like me, but I’m me too! How can there be a bug me? That doesn’t seem scientifically possible. YOU are not scientifically possible!”

“Huh, so this is how Panacea felt…” Twilight noted. “But enough of that.... How do YOU exist? I know I sound like you, you are supposed to be my ponysona! So I am scientifically possible, but unless disguises come to life then YOU shouldn’t be possible! See! The facts reveal the truth!”

Twily blinked, a challenge of logic dawning in her mind.

“There is nothing logical about any of this.” Discord noted with a small laugh.

“Indeed.”

“...And that’s how I know you’re from a different world!” Twily deduced, pointing at Twilight victoriously.

“Wait, what?” Discord asked, befuddled.

“What did we miss?”

“Ah ha! So this is what it’s like to be on the receiving end of my brilliance!” Princess Twilight squeed. “Oh, I am so jealous of the non-me people!”

“Ooh, ooh, now do it to me!” Twily squealed in excitement.

“...This isn’t how I thought this was going to go,” Discord Dos commented in amusement.

“And I thought Skittles had an ego…”

“...And that’s how changeling magic works!” Twilight concluded her essay with a smirk.

“Again!? How are they doing this so fast!?”

“Oooooh, that feels wonderful! I’m jealous, too!” Twily cooed, shuddering in ecstasy. “And I love the categorisation you made, such numerical excellence! If only the girls could keep up with things like this…”

Princess Twilight sighed. “I know. Not even my mother gets it, she just nods. Which is a shame, I suspect she was as big a bookworm as me back in the day.”

“Oh! Do we have the same mothers?” Twily asked, clopping her hooves together giddily.

“Er, kinda? By adoption. Then there’s Celestia and Chrysalis. My family is weird.”

“Oh, how interesting!” Twily stated, a notepad in her magic. “But onto your previous statement, it’s not like time will ever change us to be like that!”

Princess Twilight nodded. “Nope! I never intend to change my ways, why would I?”

“Poor ignorant soul…”

“Also, you mentioned Celestia as being a ‘mother’ a second ago,” Twily pointed out. “Is Rainbow Dash her adopted daughter in your world, too?”

Twilight snorted. “Rainbow Dash? Royalty? She’d hate it! And really, I don't think Equestria could handle it.”

“Oh, she does hate it,” Twily giggled before sauntering up to Twilight. “But she grew up with it and I was there to keep her in check.”

“Good thing she had such an excellent organiser to keep her in line!” Twilight said. “Not to toot my own horn. And since we’re technically two different people, I’m not!”

“Oh, you can toot my horn all you want.” Twily cood dreamily.

“What?”

“Oh, nothing!” Twily shook her head, blushing. “That just, uh, came out…”

“...did… did you just come out of the closet?” Twilight asked with a playful smirk.

“I’m bi, okay?!” Twily groaned in embarrassment.

“Well that’s good, so am I!” Twilight remarked. “I mean, all changelings are, we feed on love after all.”

“Oh, you do?”

“Yup! And yours is particularly delicious!” Twilight shivered slightly while licking her lips.

“...This is quickly going towards a weird form of masturbation…” Discord Dos deadpanned.

“What have we done?”

“I always knew I tasted good,” Twily replied with a smirk. “Not that Rainbow would ever know. She’s straight as an arrow.”

“Arrows bend, you know that, right?” Twilight commented with a smirk.

“Well, yeah. But she’s so rigid she’d snap in two if I tried.” Twily sighed despondent before straightening up. “Not that I’m into her like that. We’re like sisters. That would be gross.”

“And yet these two Twilight’s are flirting like they’re on love poison…”

“Oh god why…”

“Yeah, I guess that would be a little off…” Twilight agreed. “Hey, you still have a Shining Armor in this universe?”

“Yup. And a Cadance,” Twily confirmed, and then noted something odd about her chitinous ‘friend’. “Huh… What’s with the scar?”

Twilight grimaced, rubbing the scar on her chest lightly. “Something I would rather not talk about. Things got… dicey in my world for a while.”

Twily’s ears flattened. “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Still though, they say mares like scars.” Twily then closed the distance and nuzzled into Twilight affectionately.

Maybe a bit too affectionately.

“Uh…” Princess Twilight suddenly resisted the urge to morph into a tomato. “Thanks…”

“My pleasure…” Twily cooed.

I… am strangely okay with this. Twilight thought to herself. ...What is my life coming to?

The Princess coughed, deciding she needed an out before her… odd fantasies came to life. “Ah, ahem! In the interest of science, how about you show me your Ponyville? I haven't been to mine in a while and I am eager to see how much is different.” She asked with a big grin.

“Oh, of course!” Twily beamed before practically bouncing over to the door and pushing it open with her magic. “Right this way!”

As soon as the two stepped out of the front door, they froze. There was Pinkie Pie, an envelope in her hoof. She blinked, looked between the two, then smirked. “I see I don’t need to invite you to my party. You’ve already got your own going~”

“Uh,” Princess Twilight raised a hoof.

“Have fuuun~” Pinkie called back playfully as she bounced away.

The two Twilight’s blushed something fierce. “She’s onto us.” Twily whispered.

“Huh?” Twilight asked.

“N-nothing!” Twily stuttered, flinching away slightly.

Twilight then nodded before green flames enveloped her.

“Sweet Celestia jumping over the moon in heat!” Twily appropriately shrieked, backpedaling away before the flames died away to reveal… a version of Twilight with an inverted colour scheme. Blue coat, pink hair with a blue highlight.

“Now we can be cousins or something, perfect cover story!” the Princess stated.

“Oh my word, Ponyville is gonna thing I’m boinking my cousin…” Twily muttered.

“What was that?”

“Nothing!” Twily sang, trotting along without a care in the world. Which was a lie, because she had all the cares in the world at that moment. And most of them were aimed squarely at her other self. She then glanced over her shoulder. “Must we be cousins, though?”

“Er… I mean, we could use something else, but it may not be as believable.” Twilight shrugged.

“Eeeh… Fair enough.” Twily also shrugged before gesturing at Ponyville. “Anyway, here’s Ponyville. Any differences that you can see yet?”

Twilight narrowed her eyes as she analyzed the view. “Well, from here, no. I mean, that house over there is supposed to be done building already, but that’s about it. Of course, I don’t exactly have a good vantage point from here.”

“THE CLOCK TOWER!” Twily squealed, putting her hooves to her cheeks in delight. “We can go to the clock tower and you can look at everything”

“Oh, okay. That makes sense.” Twilight nodded before falling into step next to Twily as they began to trot side-by-side into town.

Though Twily did seem to slow just ever so slightly, trotting up behind Twilight for some reason. And for some reason her eyes were not on the road but… on... her…

“This is actually happening, isn’t it?” Twilight muttered, ears going red. “I thought this was joking around at first, but now…”

Twily merely hummed, delighting in the eye candy on display. Then her eyes snapped back up to Twilight’s. “Oh, uh, by the way-!” she stuttered a bit, trying to avoid sounding like she was making a distraction.

“Hm?”

“Uh, you said that the building near the library was supposed to be done already. And, well, talking about the clocktower got me thinking: Are you from the future?!” Twily bounced on that last word.

“I dunno, maybe?” Twilight said with a shrug. “If we wait till its night, I might be able to tell by the small differences in the stars.”

“Oh my gosh, you can do that too!” Twily squeed again, prancing in place. “YOU ARE PERFECT!”

And so the blush deepened. “Uh… Clocktower. Get there. Right…”

The two trotted on a little way further, Twily still staying a telling distance behind Twilight, who was feeling a mix of alarm and odd arousal. As a changeling, she couldn’t say no to love, but for her counterpart to actually FALL IN LOVE (or just be desperate) with herself… well…

She was still oddly alright with it. But probably shouldn’t have been.

Finally, and a little awkwardly, the two made it to the clocktower. Canterling up the stairs until they were on top of the large structure, all of Ponyville spread out before them. A breathtaking sight, perfect for a date.

“Let’s be honest here, guys, that’s what this is.”

“I did not see this coming…”

“Do we want a camera? You know? To capture the moment?”

“Let’s not turn this into an M Rating, now.”

Both Twilights sat down on top of the clocktower, Twily’s tail inching a little close to Twilight’s. As far as Princess Twilight could tell, nothing was different about the sleepy little town. It was the same as it had always been…

What was happening right beside her, though, was decidedly different to any other situation she had found herself in.

“Okay, as an empath I can detect love,” Princess Twilight deadpanned. “Not that you’re not completely obvious. You want to fuck yourself, go you.”

Twily blinked in shock, her turn to go red. “I… well… I’ve never met anypony like you.”

“One, not a pony. Two, yes you have, YOU!”

Twily’s cheeks puffed up. “That doesn’t count! And it’s not technically illegal…”

“I don’t think there’s a precedent for this…”

“Alright, then let’s make a precedent!”

“You know, I thought you were just teasing when you talked about the tooting horn thing,” Twilight deadpanned. “I really don’t know how to feel about this…”

“Come on…” Twily all but begged. “For… science!”

Twilight just sighed, and yet…

“So… being a pony… you still like to perform… tests?”

Twily grinned. “What kind of tests?”

“Fuck it… I’m gonna fuck myself,” Twilight decided.

Now that she was here, laying down on a metal table with Twily looming over her with a metal pokey stick, Twilight realized that Twily wasn’t going to start with anything sexual. She was genuinely curious about her anatomy as a changeling and decided it would be a good way to break what little ice was left.

But the enthusiasm her other self was displaying was contagious. Twilight grinned up at the ceiling. “POKE ME!” She declared loudly.

“POKING!” Twily answered before poking Twilight in the armpit, making the changeling shiver.

“TWILIGHT?!” came a chorus of voices.

The two Twilight’s looked up to see a hole in reality, with a large group of ponies including two Rainbow Dashes, the rest of their friends, and some more changelings, including a tall one looking back at them in shock.

Twilight waved bashfully. “Hi mom… uh, I can explain?”

“This is one fetish I didn’t need to know about,” Chrysalis muttered, facehoofing heavily.

Epilogue - Sh*t Breaks

Epilogue - Sh*t Breaks

Princess Twilight blushed and waved at Chrysalis. “Hi Mom… uh, I can explain.”

“This is one fetish I didn’t need to know about,” Chrysalis muttered, facehoofing heavily.

“MOM!!” Princess Twilight groaned, blushing heavily. “It’s not sexual!”

“That’s your mom?” Twily asked.

“Mm-hmm.”

“WHY IS THE WORLD ENDING?!” Rainbow then added to the ongoing discussion, gesturing wildly to the fact that the world was gone. All that was left for them to stand on was part of the hive’s hallway and Twily’s love basement.

“Maybe because Twilight has some deep seated issues…” the other Rainbow Dash, henceforth known as Dashie, the not royal one, commented. “I mean… seriously?”

“...I can explain?” Twilight offered for a second time.

“Your love stinks the air,” Chrysalis deadpanned. “It’s already explained everything.”

“Changelings can’t feed on other changelings love,” Twilight reminded her mother.

“She’s not a changeling,” Chrysalis shot back, pointing at Twily.

“Point taken.”

“Uh, hello?! World still ending!” Rainbow complained, pointing to the rapidly dissolving remains of their world.

As if to illustrate the point, a small piece of the wall sheared off and took all the drones along with it, gone into the abyss.

“See!” Rainbow shouted out.

“Twilight, dear,” Chrysalis said gently, ignoring Rainbow Dash. “This is… probably not healthy, and I feel like we need to talk about this.”

“Mom, I know it’s weird… but I LIKE HER!”

“Aww…” Twily cooed.

“Is this really the time!?” Rainbow Dash stressed for the millionth time.

Andy further comments made by Chrysalis or the group of friends was cut off, as with another crash, the last of the universe seemed to peel away, leaving only the two Twilights and the two Rainbow Dashes left over. A swirling vortex streamed all around them, only the small segment of Twilight’s basement remained along with the metal table Princess Twilight was still strapped to.

“Ugh, if we’re going to die, can we not die with you two fulfilling your deepest darkest fantasies!” Rainbow Dash shouted in indignation. “Seriously, Twilight, what’s up with all of this?”

“Well, it’s not like you’ve ever appreciated my bookhorsiness!” Twily shouted back, releasing the clamps holding her counterpart down. “And she… she truly does…!”

“Hold on, one last thing…” Discord Dos said slyly.

“...Oh you brilliant bastard.”

“And the same goes for her!” Princess Twilight said back. “It’s not like I have many options in the hive! Everyone sees me as this figurehead, none even get close! It’s like I’m the Princess of the Friendzone!”

“So let us have this!” Twily said in agreement. “Rainbows… please?”

Both Rainbows were no longer looking at the Twilights, but rather something behind them. Both Twilight blinked, and then they slowly turned around to see the Changeling Queen standing behind them with the most disturbed look on her face.

“...Was I really this demented?” Queen Twilight Sparkle asked in confusion, her mind racing a mile a minute. “I mean… just… really?”

And then the universe crashed.

“Huh… that was… unexpected.” Discord Dos commented, observing the once-again obliterated realities.

“It was fun, though,” Discord added, munching on some popcorn with a video camera in his claws that he just stopped recording with. “Though I think our chaos magic was making them a little OOC…”

“Were you…?” Discord Dos began, raising an eyebrow when he turned to his other.

Discord down some more popcorn. “Of course! I don't want to forget any of this! Perfect blackmail!”

“Blackmail for who?” Discord Dos questioned.

Discord grinned. “Yes.”

“Welp, that happened.”

-Skijaramaz

“Excuse me while I grab a drink… or two.”

-Tom117z

“For once, you’re the one that’s broken and not me!”

-Skijaramaz

“Fuck. You.”

-Tom117z