"Where Do Foals Come From?"

by PixelMoon

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Shining Armor, Twilight Sparkle, Twilight Velvet, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Night Light, Princess Cadance
Length: 1254

A sweet, innocent question pops into filly Twilight Sparkle's mind one day. Madness ensues.

Every parent knows that one day their filly or colt will wonder where they came from. And then their filly asks it.

Madness ensues.

Filly Twilight Sparkle Art by Elemectric

Popular - 1-7-18 Yay!

Published 2018-01-07 19:50:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-01-07 19:50:06 UTC

"But I Just Want to Know!"

"Where Do Foals Come From?"

Written by PixelMoon

Twilight Velvet sat in a chair in the dining room, her glass of coffee now all over the floor. A deep red blush adorned her face as her filly, Twilight Sparkle, stared innocently at her mother.

Not even five minutes ago, little Twilight had gotten curious. She trotted up to her mother and then asked a very personal question.

"Mommy, I have a question!~"

The not even five minute past Twilight Velvet gave a sweet smile, only for it to disappear when her daughter asked the question.

"~Where do fillies and foals come from?"

And then her cup of coffee had fallen onto the floor, shattering in several pieces. The liquid that had been in her mouth then was spat out onto Twilight.

"Honey...? What was that?" The father of little Twilight Sparkle asked, coming down the stairs of their home.

Velvet gave a flustered smile, the blush still on her cheeks. Twilight had turned around to face Nightlight, her handsome father.

"Er... Twilight! Dearie, do you think you could ask your amazing father, who can answer most anything, that question you asked me?"

Twilight gave a huge gasp before nodded her head off. She hopped towards the Amazing and Smart Nightlight. The amazing stallion had a confused smile on his face, which totally turned into a flustered smile as well.

"Where do foals come from, daddy!?" Twilight exclaimed, her brain just inching with the wonders of the world.

"Um... what, Twily? I doing think I heard you right," the Now Totally Flustered Night the Smart asked. He stuck a hoof in his ear, attempting to clean it out. All that came out was some earwax, which Twilight had secretly out in a jar for... experimental... stuff.

"I said where do foals come from! Y'know, colts, fillies, people related to you, me?"

And then Nightlight the Surprised fainted. Right in front of Twilight the Curious. Who then poked her father before shrugging. Then she walked back over to Twilight Velvet.

Velvet the Nervous chucked and then wiped her forehead just full of sweat. Just then, Twilight Velvet the Genius had a sudden amazing idea! She could faint like Nightlight the Currently Unconscious!

Velvet then started to smack her head on the wooden chair she sat upon. Twilight the Confused stopped approaching her probably mental mother with concern for her health.

Twilight Velvet the Mental started screaming to herself because reasons. "COME ON! FAINT! FAINT! FAINT YOU DARN UNICORN! FAINTTTT!~"

And then her screaming had made the dear brother of Twilight Sparkle come out along with his dear girlfriend, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. The dear princess had headphones around her slender, gorgeous neck. And the Shining Armor? Oh, he had popcorn in his mane, and, well, anywhere else you could think of really.

"Mom! Can you stop screaming! Me and Cadance are trying to eat popcorn!" Shining the Pony Popcorn shouted, his eyebrows with popcorn on them furrowed.

But then he stared down in the dining room. And saw his mental mother slamming her head into the wooden chair that now had her head imprint. And then he saw Twilight screaming at the top of her lungs.

"I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHERE FOALS COME FROM!!!!" Twilight the Angry screamed, her hooves slamming on the ground in a hissy fit.

And then Shining Armor's pupils dilated. And then he stared at Cadance, who had given a blank stare. Shining the Shocked's face began to turn red. So he trotted downstairs. Because reasons.

Cadance the Popcorn Lover had ran crown the stairs, causing Shining the Flustered to fall down the rest. Twilight the Upset Pony continued to scream and shout, her legs flailing everywhere.

Just then, Nightlight the Now Conscious awoken with a groan, catching everypony's attention. Velvet the Still Probably Mental had stopped slamming her head into the chair to stare at her husband.

"Nightlight!" She shouted.

"Velvet!" He screamed.

"Mom!" Shining Armor exclaimed.

"What the heck?!" Cadance facehoofed.

Shining was now in the living room where Nightlight sat. Cadance had a small grin on her face as she stared, picking popcorn out of Shining's mane.

"Oh this is gonna be great!" Cadance exclaimed while laying on the couch. "Come on Twilight, ask Shining the question!"

"Cadance! You're enjoying this?" Shining shouted. Cadance slapped Shining's knee and laughed.

Twilight stared expectantly at her dear parents. Twilight Velvet had gone into the living room and had sat next to her husband, who stared at his wife with concern for his own health.

Velvet nudged Nightlight because she felt like it. He took her unobvious hint to start the speaking of the words.

"Twilight..." Twily the filly had finally stopped screaming and stared with a huge grin.

"This isn't happening right now! It can't be!" Shining moaned while plugging his ears with his hooves.

"I think it's time to tell you..."

Shining grabbed a blanket and hid his face in it while increasing the pressure on his ears. "Noooooo! It is! Sweet Celestia I can't watch!"

Cadance placed her forehooves on the lump that was her coltfriend with a massive grin plastered across her face. "I can!"

"... how foals are made." Nightlight stated, wishing he could hide under the blanket with his son.

Twilight Velvet grabbed her own blanket and placed it on herself. "I'm just not here anymore."

"You see, Twily. When two parents love each other very much. They..." Nightlight continued, a deep red blush adorned his face.

"MY LITTLE SISTER, BEST FRIEND FOREVER! LIKE TWO PEAS IN A POT WE CONTINUED TO STAY INNOCENT!" Shining sang off-key.

Cadance squealed in delight. "Ohh! This could so help me learn how ponies react when learning about true love! Keep going, Mr. Nightlight!"

Twilight Velvet lifted her blanket. "Don't encourage this! She honestly shouldn't know yet!"

Twilight the Filly placed her face closer to her father. "Let him speak! Let him speak! I want to know what happens when two ponies love each other very much!"

"... they love to show each other just how much they love their partner in life," Nightlight said, his eyes filled with tears because of the pain he felt.

"LA LA LA LA!!! BANANA! I'M A BANANA! I'M A BANANA!" Shining sang on. He was fully under the blanket now, curled up in a ball.

"The suspense is killing me!" Cadance shouted gleefully.

"I'm not here anymore, I'm not here anymore. Celestia burn this planet please," Twilight Velvet said, sitting under her blanket.

"And so they do stuff."

Cadance and Velvet blinked. "Oh," Cadance deadpanned.

"Stuff that leads to making love," Nightlight added.

Velvet sighed underneath the blanket. "There it is!~"

Twilight had a huge smile plastered across her face. "Anddddddd...????"

Nightlight wiped the painful tears. "And thus you were born."

"THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME! THERE IS NO PLACE LIKE HOME!" Shining screamed from under his blanket.

"Shining, have you taken your meds today?! Shut it!" Cadance shouted while staring without blinking.

"I don't take medication!" Shining yelled.

Twilight stared with wonder. "Whoa..."

Nightlight fainted once more. Shining continued to sing, and Cadance stared expectantly. Velvet sat with her blanket, before peaking through a hole.

Twilight was jotting down notes with a huge grin. Then she trotted over to her mother. She lifted the blanket to ask one more question.

"Can I make love?"

"NO."

"But I just wanted to know!" Twilight screamed before passing out from overwhelming knowledge.

The End.