The Pie Courier and Friends

by Manaphy

Rating: teen
Tags: Applejack, Trixie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Adventure, Random
Length: 9634

Applejack receives a request to deliver pies for someone whose home is far away, but while the journey may be dangerous, she'll have some partners by her side. Unfortunately, they're far from the easiest ponies to work alongside.

Applejack receives a request to deliver pies for someone whose home is far away, but while the journey may be dangerous, she'll have some partners by her side. Unfortunately, they're far from the easiest ponies to work alongside.

Published 2018-01-23 20:00:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-01-23 20:00:06 UTC

It's Not All Fun and Games in the Swamp

"Three for three!" Rainbow Dash gloated. She pulled her hoof away from Applejack's and tapped her own chest, grinning smugly. "Gotta work those forelegs if you're gonna have a chance of beating me."

Applejack shook her left foreleg and winced. It was the thirtieth time in a row she'd lost a hoof-wrestling competition to Rainbow Dash, and it was thirty times too many as far as she was concerned. She'd kept track ever since the fourth or fifth defeat, and each subsequent one stung a little more. However, she would've rather kept the number to herself, even if she had to clench her teeth to preserve that secret.

Sighing, Applejack adjusted her stetson and stood tall. "Alright, I'll admit you've got me on that one. Doesn’t mean you're the stronger pony between us, but I'll get you one of these days." She quickly turned to face a series of apple trees that dotted much of Sweet Apple Acres, empty baskets placed around a few nearby trunks. "Y'all wouldn't beat me when it came to harvesting apples, that's for sure. You could try every trick in the book short of magic, and you'd come up short."

"Says the pony who couldn't cut a tree down with her bare hooves," Rainbow Dash teased as she hovered in place. "You think the Wonderbolts are jealous of my strength for no reason? They were excited when I joined the team for more than just my wings." She landed on all fours, then shook her wings and puffed her chest out. “It’s not easy being this awesome.”

"Firstly, you're supposed to get the apples without cutting down the trees." Applejack touched her forehead, nose scrunched. "If you split 'em in two, you'd ruin the chance of getting more apples in the next cycle, and you'd run the risk of squishing some of 'em."

Rainbow Dash's cheeks flushed. "Oh, right. Guess you've got me there." She touched her lips, chuckled, and ruffled her feathers. "I’d probably figure it out after a few tries. Doesn't seem too hard."

"It ain’t as easy as it looks, and you've gotta be patient." Applejack gave Rainbow Dash a nod as she approached her friend, then stopped once they were a few steps apart. "Besides, you always preferred the louder and flashier approach between the two of us. I haven't forgotten 'bout the time you tried getting all that attention during your first show as a Wonderbolt."

Rainbow Dash gently kicked the air. "Might've forgotten the lesson on call signs at the academy."

"Is that so?" Applejack arched an eyebrow. "Seems legit."

"Not gonna think about my bad ideas too much." Rainbow Dash swooped around Applejack, then landed beside her friend as a gust of wind swirled past the two. She stifled a laugh as Applejack held her stetson in place and scrunched her nose, then continued, "Anyway, what's next?"

"Gonna bring the dozen or so baskets back into the barn. Ain’t much left to harvest for today." Applejack turned to face her friend, and she patted the latter's shoulder. "Would've gotten that out of the way before you showed up, but a chance to end my losing streak was too good to pass up."

"Thirty and counting." Rainbow Dash chortled once more. "Don’t worry about it too much. You'd totally embarrass me if our next contest involved hind legs. I've seen what you can do with those."

Applejack's smile brightened. "Looks like I've got an idea for our next contest."

"Spoke too much?" Rainbow Dash wiped her forehead and glanced away from Applejack, which earned chuckles from the latter. "Okay, I totally spoke too much."

"Then it's decided!" Applejack nodded, then turned around and made eye contact with Rainbow Dash. "In three days, we'll have another competition, but we'll have to only use our hind legs to move stuff from one place to another. First one to the finish line wins, obviously." She sported a confident grin and caught her breath. "How 'bout it, Rainbow—"

"Letter for Applejack!" a cheerful voice exclaimed from seemingly nowhere. A gray pegasus adorned with a blue shirt and cap glided above Sweet Apple Acres, then slowly descended toward Applejack and Rainbow Dash. She landed on three of her hooves and shook her hind leg, then pulled an envelope out of her saddlebag. The gray mare's cross-eyed appearance and bright smile were recognizable from anywhere, the latter of which grew when she repeated, "Letter for Applejack!"

"Thanks, Derpy," said Applejack. She gently took the envelope and clenched it between her hoof and chest. "Don't know what Ponyville would do without your help."

Derpy smiled sheepishly and blushed. "Somepony's gotta do it."

"That reminds me of something," Rainbow Dash said as she leaned closer to Derpy. The two made eye contact for a moment. "I'm supposed to get a Daring Do book in a few days, but I'd totally love the chance to get a copy early." She noticed that Derpy's expression hadn't changed, and her shoulders sagged. "Guess that's a no."

Derpy bobbed her head. "Can’t pull strings on that, silly!" She flapped her wings and waved at the two ponies, then adjusted her mailbag. "Wish I could stay, but I've gotta deliver a bunch more letters. Wouldn't want 'em waiting another second." She waved her hoof again, and her acquaintances responded in kind. "See you later!"

As Derpy flew away from Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack brought her attention back to the envelope. Her eyes shifted toward the stamp at the top left corner that depicted a flame surrounded by what looked like charred branches. The mere sight of that stamp solicited a sigh from her, eyes narrowed.

"Know 'em?" Rainbow Dash asked with a perplexed look.

"Looks like I'm gonna have to cross the Flame Geyser Swamp," Applejack muttered, lips curled into a frown. “Again.” She hastily opened the envelope and pulled out its contents, a letter with rough edges and a few specks of ash stuck on the sheet of paper. Before she read the letter, she lowered it and gazed at Rainbow Dash. "You've been there once, right?"

Rainbow Dash stroked her chin and nodded. "Yeah, I've been there with some of the Wonderbolts at least twice, but I don't know much about the place other than the swamp itself. One time never saw us land in the swamp, and the other lasted all of ten minutes. It's kinda smelly, right?"

"That only scratches the surface." Applejack brought the letter toward her. Sighing, she tapped the sheet of paper and narrowed her eyes. The writing was difficult to make out with its smudges and poor calligraphy, but not impossible to decipher. "Let's see what he wants this time."

Applejack,

Could you deliver three four apple pies for us? Looks like we got through the last batch quicker than expected. I'll pay more to compensate.

Wheat Stalk

Applejack turned away from Rainbow Dash and strolled toward the barn. "Was confident they wouldn't go through 'em all for at least a few weeks. Must've had some kind of party or something.” She sighed once more, head raised. “Can't turn down a customer, especially if they're somepony who's helped me a few times.”

Rainbow Dash tilted her head. “How so?”

“He collects some ingredients in the Flame Geyser Swamp, and they’re found nowhere else. Awfully convenient for me since going there’s always a chore." Applejack crossed her forelegs and swished her tail as she tried to relax. “I deliver some apple pies in return.”

"You go on these adventures by yourself?" Rainbow Dash asked before she caught up to the farmer. "Are you crazy?"

"Big Macintosh won't do 'em, and Apple Bloom's too young. That ain't counting the first time she wandered into the Flame Geyser Swamp." Applejack froze in place. She turned to look at Rainbow Dash’s bright grin, and she withheld a laugh. "You wanna come along, huh?"

Rainbow Dash playfully waved a hoof. "You know I can't turn down a good adventure!"

The two trotted alongside each other as they approached the picturesque barn of Sweet Apple Acres. Its fresh coat of red and white paint made it seemingly brand new, which made the nearby cottage's antiquated appearance and faded colors stand out even more than usual. Applejack opened the barn's front door, then waved her hoof as a small cloud of dust swirled around them.

Despite the entrance in need of some cleaning, the rest of the barn was practically spotless, or at least as clean as a frequently used barn could've been. Piles of hay, baskets, yokes, hoes, and whatever else a farmer might have needed were neatly organized along the walls. However, Applejack focused on a drawer off to the side, seemingly unimportant compared to the array of equipment.

Before she reached the drawer, Applejack stopped and glanced back at Rainbow Dash, cheeks tautened a little. She took a deep breath and said, "The Flame Geyser Swamp's gonna be especially dangerous, so you'll have to fly the entire time unless you want your hooves burned. Your Wonderbolt uniform could withstand ‘em, but I know you ain’t gonna waste time getting dressed up."

"These wings haven't failed me!" Rainbow Dash boasted. She landed on all fours, and a chuckle passed through her lips. "And yeah, I don’t think I’ll need the uniform. We’re just going to a swamp, and I'd rather get going as soon as possible. You know what I mean, right?"

“Don’t whine if you burn your hooves.” Applejack rolled her eyes, then resumed making her way toward the drawer. "You’ve got plenty of time to prepare. We ain’t leaving right away, and it’s better to get ready for anything that might come our way."

Rainbow Dash inched closer to Applejack, a perplexed look on her visage as the latter withdrew green saddlebags, ropes and various snacks, a red flute, and a set of fireproof boots from the drawer. The pegasus rubbed her eyes. "Don't you think you're bringing a little too much? It's not gonna take hours, right?"

"Do I need to repeat myself?" Applejack donned her fireproof boots, a snug fit yet exceptionally comfortable. It was the same story for her saddlebags made of the finest nylon, large enough to have carried all kinds of goods without being too obtrusive. Once she had everything aside from the apple pies, Applejack turned to face Rainbow and sported a smirk. "Could've sworn a Wonderbolt knew to pay attention."

Rainbow Dash pouted, then groaned. "Now you're sounding like Spitfire."

Chuckling, Applejack touched her chin and sported a wide grin. "Ain't she the Captain of the Wonderbolts for a reason?"

"Yeah, it's because she—" Rainbow Dash cut herself off, eyes widened. Her mouth hung agape for a moment, but quickly assumed a more relaxed visage. "Oh, right. She's busy with paperwork, team plans, and pretty much all the boring stuff that'd drive me crazy. No wonder Twilight warned me about becoming captain."

"Which means you ought to listen when I'm telling you 'bout the swamp. I’ll bring most of what we need as long as you help out a little with the supplies." Applejack furrowed her brow and trudged closer to her friend. She gazed at Rainbow Dash’s visage, but the mare's shimmering eyes and sudden change in expression were nothing new. "I know you're trying to trick me with them puppy-dog eyes."

Rainbow Dash rubbed the back of her neck, then whispered, "My goodness, you really are turning into Spitfire."

"Not a bad thing."

"Alright, I get it. I’ll carry some of the stuff, but I know we won’t need ‘em." Flicking her tail, Rainbow Dash gave Applejack a slight nod before turning around. She shook her wings for a moment. "Totally dealt with crazier stuff before. We'll totally be out of the swamp in minutes!"

Applejack stifled a laugh as she caught up to Rainbow Dash, and the two made their way toward the barn's exit. "You haven't seen anything yet. Don't think anything I'm gonna tell you will change a thing between when I get the pies and the start of our journey, but you'll understand."

Rainbow Dash playfully nudged her friend's shoulder. "Keep telling yourself that."

Stifling a laugh, Applejack then whispered under her breath, “Oh, you’ll definitely understand.”

Looks were subjective, but nopony who knew a thing about nature could've claimed with a straight face that the Flame Geyser Swamp and its surrounding region weren't unique. Most of the flora and fauna within the region couldn't have been found anywhere else in the known world, and that hadn't gone into their exotic patterns, pungent scents that were indescribable, and colors that demanded attention. The few ponies who'd ventured into the swamp found the fiery bursts in the swamp's central region somewhat mundane in comparison.

Applejack surveyed her surroundings from the moment she reached the swamp, the putrid stench of sulfur and ash in the air unmistakable. Lizards with red and gray scales scuttled across the dry soil, snails that resembled a ball of red slime given life congregated around the few trees that could've withstood the high temperatures, and giant flowers made themselves known with their psychedelic patterns.

While she wasn't a stranger to the various plants and animals, something about them always made Applejack uneasy. It was like she wandered into a pony's dream, and Princess Luna would've descended from the sky with her usual words of wisdom.

"You said this place was weird, right?" Rainbow Dash muttered as she swooped closer to Applejack. She tucked her legs, careful not to have touched the blackened, cracked earth. "Looks pretty normal for a swamp to me. I totally expected a bunch of weird creatures with three eyes or a snake for a tail. Everything looks—"

"The second one actually exists," Applejack corrected. She turned to face Rainbow Dash and furrowed her brow. "Can't believe you forgot about the time I saved my sister from the chimera that roams 'round these parts." When her friend hadn't muttered a single word, Applejack groaned and rolled her eyes. "The story you thought was awesome, remember?"

Rainbow Dash nodded and suppressed a giggle. "I'm just messing with you, Applejack." She glided inches above Applejack, then tapped the latter's shoulder. "How could I forget something that awesome? You made that chimera look so dumb, right?"

"What can I say? I know my critters." Applejack's lips curled into a soft smile. "Helps that one of our friends knows everything about 'em and then some." She paused for a moment, then glanced back at Rainbow Dash. "As for your earlier point, have you been paying attention to the weird flowers all over the place? Were the snails that looked like fireballs not weird enough?"

"Not your usual animal." Rainbow Dash crossed her forelegs, lips curled into a smug grin. "Have you ever bumped into a maulwurf?"

Applejack shook her head. "What's that got to do with anything?"

Chuckling, Rainbow Dash rubbed some of her feathers against Applejack's barrel as she flew closer to the mare. "Everything, silly! They've got those thick hides and bright colors and weird noses. Spitfire told me about them, and let me tell you, they're not pretty."

"Maybe they're not your usual critter, but a thick hide makes a lot of sense. Protects 'em from predators and whatnot." Applejack paused, then took a deep breath and raised her head. "Ain't the best at describing those things, so ask Fluttershy if you wanna know more."

"Was totally expecting something—"

A bloodcurdling scream echoed throughout the swamp, its tone eerily familiar. Snaps and pops followed seconds later, which were then joined by a brilliant flash of pink light. It could've been a distress signal, or it might've been a spell meant to drive away whatever attacked the voice's owner. However, the possibility that it was meant for something much darker wormed its way into Applejack's mind.

Applejack crept toward where the pinkish light shone. Sweat poured down her forehead. She brought her attention back to Rainbow Dash, froze in place, and quickly glanced back at the cluster of trees. Her heart skipped a beat when another flash of light erupted, and the silhouettes of a unicorn and some kind of creature were apparent for the tiniest of moments.

"Come on, we're saving her!" Applejack ordered. With heavy steps, she charged forward and never averted her gaze from the incident's approximate location. She made a mental checklist of all the supplies she brought for the journey: rope, bait, traps, and an array of possible distractions. “Hurry!”

"Don't have to tell me twice!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she swooped past Applejack, eyes narrowed and tongue stuck out. "Let's show 'em who's boss!"

The two ponies weaved their way around an array of charred trees and shrubs, closing their eyes for a moment whenever the flash of pink light returned. A minute or so had passed by the time they'd reached the altercation, and Applejack wasn't surprised whatsoever when she noticed the pony in the middle of danger. Rainbow Dash, however, gasped when she recognized the traveler's familiar visage.

Trixie stood before them, clothed in her usual hat and cape as well as a set of long, brown boots. Her coat was partly covered with dirt as she stared at a grayish spider the size of a house, the creature's fangs bared as green slime escaped its mouth. The unicorn and spider stared at each other, though the pony's tightened cheeks sharply contrasted the spider's steely-eyed stare.

Guess my lasso won’t work, Applejack thought. Chills coursed through her spine, and she assessed the creature’s massive body. It wasn't the scariest creature she'd seen, but intimidating enough to where her coat turned pale. Stunning it might work, but it’d have to be something especially powerful. Still don’t know why—

"You'll never wrap the Great and Powerful Trixie in your web, ruffian!" Trixie shouted as her horn emitted a pink glow. She fired a spell into the spider's face, which sent the creature back toward one of the nearby trees as it shielded all of its eyes. Trixie inched away from her foe, but brought her attention to Applejack and Rainbow Dash the moment she noticed them. A confused look ran across her face.

"What the heck are you doing here, Trixie?" Applejack questioned as she galloped toward the unicorn. They brought their focus back to the spider. "The Flame Geyser Swamp's no place for just anypony to wander! You seriously know what you're doing?"

"Could ask you the same thing!" Trixie replied, eyes narrowed and nose scrunched. "The Great and Powerful Trixie planned on some practice for an upcoming show that involved scorching temperatures and fantastic displays of bravery and wit, as Trixie's illusions must be in their top form, but this spider accosted me!"

"You ain't hurt, right?"

"For the most part, no." Trixie looked over to Applejack, cheeks flushed, and then back at the spider as it swayed back and forth. It was like the spider waited for the ponies to make a move. "I was unconscious for what must've been a few seconds, not to mention how this horrid creature tried to swallow me whole, but Trixie's unharmed."

"Seriously?" Applejack arched an eyebrow, and chills coursed through her spine. "How come you ain't running?"

"Trying to stun it just long enough to make my escape! It’ll chase me should Trixie flee right now!" Trixie gave her acquaintance a frustrated look, and when she lit her horn once more, another spell flew into the spider's face and knocked it away from the mare. "More spells work!"

Applejack leaned away from the creature as it rested against the tree and shook two of its front legs. "Or is it the adrenaline causing you to cast more powerful spells?" She glanced at Trixie, then shrugged. "That's how it's supposed to work, right?"

"Ask Starlight about it."

Rainbow Dash swooped in front of Applejack and Trixie, donned a confident grin, and motioned a hoof at the spider. "You're going about it the wrong way!" She clasped her hooves together, which forced nervous looks on her acquaintances. "Let me show you how it's supposed to be done!"

Shuddering, Applejack quickly stretched a hoof toward her friend. "Wait up for just a—"

In the blink of an eye, Rainbow Dash swooped behind the spider. Before the creature could have reacted, she charged toward it and punched its abdomen. A harsh crack rang around the group, and the spider shrieked at the clouds. Rainbow Dash dove in front of the giant spider as the latter winced for a moment, a smug grin across her face.

"Good going, idiot," Trixie whispered under her breath. She swallowed a lump as the spider's eyes turned a bright red, all focused on Rainbow Dash to the exclusion of anything else. "This means that it'll—" Trixie wrapped a foreleg around Applejack's shoulders, her teeth clacked together as if the temperature plummeted in an instant. "It's definitely gonna attack us now."

"Excuse me?" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, then turned to face Trixie and scowled. She crossed her forelegs. "You just spent the past few minutes blasting it with magic, and nothing like that happened? How come my idea's gonna be different? It's totally the same thing!"

Trixie slapped her forehead and groaned. "Magic and punches aren't the same thing!"

"Can't believe I'm agreeing with Trixie," Applejack muttered, quiet enough to where nopony heard.

"They're so much different, it's not even funny!" Trixie stomped the earth, then twirled away from the spider and sprinted. She performed a spell that separated the ponies from the spider with a magic, pink-colored barrier, then shouted, "Follow me if you want to live!"

Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow. "But we've got a—" cracks split the air, and the spider tumbled through the barrier and bared its fangs. Gulping, Rainbow Dash flew toward Trixie as quickly as possible. "New plan! Either we punch it a few more times, or we get out of here!"

"Second one!"

Applejack nodded in agreement, then followed her colleagues through the forest as thumps echoed around them. The three ponies ran alongside each other, but Applejack occasionally glanced back at the creature as it barreled toward them and slowed down whenever a tree was in the way. Each time she stared into the spider's eyes, it felt like making eye contact with the embodiment of death itself. Geysers erupted from afar and lit the horizon a dark orange.

Looking upwards, Applejack noticed that Rainbow Dash’s coat was paler than usual. As for Trixie, the magician panted with her tongue stuck out as she struggled to keep up with everypony else. Applejack’s heartbeats quickened as the unicorn had fallen behind even more, worried that a familiar face would soon become the spider’s latest meal.

Applejack glanced behind her shoulder, but before she brought her attention back to the world in front of her, she watched as Trixie slid across the dirt and hoisted a massive, decayed trunk with her magic. The magician stared at the creature as it slowed down and reared its body like a horse. However, Trixie hadn't budged an inch, even as her veins seemed ready to burst at any moment.

"Is she gonna—"

Grunting, Trixie smashed the massive log against the spider's head. Brownish clouds of dust formed in front of the magician, and as she stepped back and swiped away the dust that clung to her coat, she smiled sheepishly. She quickly caught up to Applejack and Rainbow Dash with a sheepish smile, yet wobbled back and forth as though she had too much to drink.

Rainbow Dash's mouth hung agape. She inched closer to Trixie and pointed at the mare's chest, then said, "Did you—"

Trixie nodded and caught her breath. "You think I've been slacking off all this time?" She suppressed a laugh. "Trixie hatched a plan when it struggled climbing a tree, and the rest kinda fell together." She panted for a few more seconds and slouched. "This is where you'll thank the Great and Powerful Trixie, right?"

"That depends," Applejack replied as she watched the cloud of dust dissipate. "You're the same pony who said punching it would've just caused more problems, but your grand idea was to just hit it really hard. That ain't much different than what Rainbow Dash tried."

Shaking her head, Trixie touched her chest and donned a smug grin. "That's why Trixie aimed for the head and not its butt. If you're gonna resort to physical violence, might as well make it count. Starlight taught me as much, but—" Trixie stifled a laugh "—we never followed through with it. Last resort, right?"

"Still don't see how my idea wasn't the same," Rainbow Dash muttered. She wore an incredulous look and narrowed her eyes. "You threw something massive at its head. Either you killed it, which is something we shouldn’t tell Fluttershy, or you've made it even angrier."

Once the dust cloud vanished completely, the spider had begun crawling away from the debris and struggled with each step. It seemed downright surreal as to how that worked, but the group all wore soft smiles and breathed sighs of relief once the creature was out of sight.

"Thank goodness that's over," Rainbow Dash muttered. She flew toward Applejack and Trixie and lazily swung her left foreleg momentarily, which was followed by a popping sound and a relaxed sigh from the pegasus. "Should be fine if we don't run into any monsters."

Applejack shook her head. "Don't count on it." A sigh passed through her lips as she assumed eye contact with Rainbow Dash, a brooding look across her face. "We've still got a ways to go before we finish things up. Plenty of time for something else to jump at us."

Chortling, Rainbow Dash momentarily bit her lip. "Like I said, it shouldn’t be a problem."

"Anyway, how come you're here?" Trixie asked, then glanced at Applejack and Rainbow Dash. She tilted her head and arched an eyebrow. "Trixie spilled the beans on why I ventured into one of Equestria's most dangerous regions, but surely you're here for more than a leisurely stroll."

"I've gotta deliver some pies to a feller named Wheat Stalk," Applejack answered. She paused as Trixie nodded in understanding, then continued, "Going through the Flame Geyser Swamp's the only way to reach his camp, and Rainbow Dash agreed to help out."

Rainbow Dash bobbed her head. "Gotta help a friend no matter what happens, though I've kinda made a few boneheaded decisions." She chuckled nervously, which earned a slight smile from Applejack. "Right now, I'm just totally surprised your idea actually worked."

Trixie rubbed the back of her neck. "Honestly, I wasn't sure it'd work, but the Great and Powerful Trixie always shines through in the end!" She giggled and touched her lips, then adjusted her hat. "Trixie will support your journey. It's the least I could do for saving my life."

"Speaking of which, we gotta figure out where we've gone," Applejack said as she withdrew a map from her saddlebag. Unfurling the sheet of paper, which depicted every last detail of the Flame Geyser Swamp and the region's points of interest, she studied her surroundings and the sun's position. Figuring out their approximate location was straightforward because of the map's accurate depiction of trees. "Looks like the journey might be a bit tougher after that mess."

Rainbow Dash flicked her tail. "How so?"

"Ended up a bit farther than I'd like." Applejack took a deep breath, then rubbed her left shoulder. "We should be able to go around the geysers and reach Wheat Stalk without trouble. Won’t be short, but it’ll get us there in one piece. The shorter route's usually best, but I don't want y'all getting hurt."

"Or we could take the shortcut and brave the danger." Trixie stroked her chin for a moment. She touched the map and pointed to her left, then stood tall. "Who am I kidding? The decision couldn't be more obvious!" With long strides, Trixie marched forward while the others followed close behind. "The Great and Powerful Trixie knows what's best! We'll take the shorter route!"

Applejack raised an eyebrow, one of her eyes narrowed. "You sure?"

“Why would the Great and Powerful Trixie lie about something so trivial?” Trixie stifled a laugh, cheeks somewhat rosy. She curled her lips into a smile and walked toward Applejack. “We just avoid the geysers, and we’ll meet up with your friend in no time!”

“Don’t think you understand why the Flame Geyser Swamp ain’t for the faint of heart.” Applejack furrowed her brow, then sighed and gently kicked the air. “These fireproof boots might protect me, but that doesn’t mean we ought to be careless. I'd normally agree with y'all, but you're new to these parts. Easier to get burned than you think.”

Rainbow Dash cocked her head and swooped closer to Applejack. “Then why not get one of those fireproof suits?”

“They’re baggy, uncomfortable, and heavy for starters. Bad enough to where they’d be a burden with such heat.” Wiping her forehead, Applejack exhaled and slouched a little. She twinged at the thought of wearing those suits, then recalled how the one she tried a while back felt like a sack of bricks dropped onto her spine. “These boots offer a little less protection, but they're much lighter and comfortable.”

Trixie donned a curious expression the moment Rainbow Dash turned to face the mare. She suppressed a laugh. “Trixie prefers to wear something that’ll accentuate her appearance. No point in practicing magic if you’re covered from head to hoof in gear.”

“Totally makes sense to me,” Rainbow Dash replied. “This reminds me a little too much about your average discussion on clothes with Rarity. She’d do everything and then some to make something look—” she waved her hoof in a circle “—what’s the word?”

“Fancy?”

Rainbow Dash’s expression brightened, and she nodded in an instant. “That’s it! She’s always about making stuff look fancy. I know she’s a sweet mare and one of the best friends in the world, but she kinda overplays those things.” She giggled for a moment. "Totally might be an understatement."

Trixie stifled a laugh and touched her lips. “Understatement of the century.” She took a deep breath, rolled her shoulders, and trotted past Applejack and Rainbow Dash. After a few steps, she froze in place once more, then pointed at Wheat Stalk’s approximate location. ”Enough faffing about, everypony. We’ve got a swamp to cross!”

“You've got it, Trixie!” Rainbow Dash swooped closer to Trixie, and she then crossed her forelegs. “Actually, what are the geysers supposed to be like?”

“Use your imagination.” Trixie touched her forehead and furrowed her brow. “The geysers shouldn’t be a problem if we don’t walk into their path, and they should be easy to spot. Besides, I’m sure you’re rearing to fly right through them like they’re nothing.”

Rainbow Dash looked away from Trixie and pressed her hooves together, yet she sported an excited smirk. “What gave you that idea?”

“Wouldn’t take a genius to figure out.” Trixie held back a laugh and pointed at her acquaintance’s chest, which caused the latter’s cheeks to flush. The magician sported a slight smirk. “I’m sure you’ve got it figured out.”

“Is that an insult?” Rainbow Dash brought her attention back to Trixie, nose scrunched and lips curled into a deep frown. Eventually, she rubbed her mane and smiled again. “Okay, I’d totally love doing something awesome and exciting, and the thought of venturing into the unknown is so cool!”

Trixie bobbed her head. “Thought so.”

“Alright, let’s stop the bickering for just a moment,” Applejack said as she caught up to the group. “Don’t know how much you’ve changed since meeting Starlight, but you’ll be frightened by the geysers. They’re powerful, unpredictable, and that’s not counting the smells and heat. Not trying to taunt you or anything, but I don’t wanna scare you if we can avoid it.”

“Scared?” Trixie scoffed. “Trixie may screech or flail or hyperventilate whenever the going gets tough, but the Great and Powerful Trixie does not get scared!” She turned away from Applejack in a huff. “Besides, I’m pretty sure your rainbow-maned friend would prefer the awesome route, borrowing her favorite word.”

“Obviously!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. She pumped her hoof into the air, then performed a tight loop and ended up beside Trixie. “Alright, we’ll head over to the swamp and cross it!” She looked back at Applejack, and a soft smile ran across her face. “Shouldn’t be too bad, right?”

Applejack shook her head. “Can't say for sure, but if you're okay with that route, there's nothing wrong with going there. Just know what y'all are getting into.” Pausing, she studied Rainbow Dash and Trixie’s vacant expressions. A sigh passed through her lips, and she lowered her head. “Surprised y’all hadn’t become friends sooner.”

Trixie leaned closer to Applejack and raised an eyebrow. “Implying?”

“Just a thought.”

Applejack wasn’t sure if her colleagues took offense to her retort, but as the two smiled and nodded, she tried to relax and followed them through the swamp’s forested areas. In a sense, she would’ve been delighted if Rainbow Dash and Trixie became close friends once they completed their journey, yet that was anything but a guarantee.

“Hope this ain't too bad,” Applejack whispered under her breath.

“Are you two insane?” Trixie shrieked at the top of her lungs. She clung onto Applejack, then took a few deep breaths and released her hold on the mare. “Trixie expected something a little unusual, but this is absurd! We'll fry the moment we get close to them!”

A series of mounds littered the soft soil and occasionally shot out bursts of fire, not unlike a volcano. No evidence of wildlife existed atop the charred landscape. The cluster of trees they’d trudged past formed a ring around the swamp, most of those closer to the flames a charcoal-like husk.

A horrid smell akin to sulfur and the boiling temperatures were the worst part. Applejack felt a little woozy as she stared at the geysers, and sweat dripped down her forehead. It wasn't like her colleagues were more enthusiastic, as while Trixie seemed exhausted, Rainbow Dash merely hovered in place and plugged her nose.

“Thinking this might’ve been a mistake,” Rainbow Dash said in a nasally tone.

Applejack arched an eyebrow, then pouted as she glanced at her friend. “I tried to warn y’all about the swamp, but you wouldn’t listen. We can either press forward and not get too close to the geysers, or we can take the safer route I mentioned earlier.”

Rainbow Dash nodded in an instant. “Guess that settles things." She sighed, and her shoulders sagged a little. "I know you're not gonna hear my side of the argument, and Trixie's already made up her mind.”

“Exactly! More importantly, who'd live in such a wretched place?” Trixie added as she flicked her tail. She narrowed her eyes, turned away from the geysers, and wiped the sweat off her brow. “I don’t understand why Wheat Stalk goes here often. Is he masochistic or something?”

“Don’t think so,” said Applejack. She touched her chin and stood tall, a bemused look on her face. “Wheat Stalk gathers some of the local plants for spices and meals, and living by the swamp is more convenient for him. I’d prefer something farther away, but it’s understandable.”

Trixie bobbed her head. “Guess that makes sense, but it’s still crazy.” She rolled her shoulders, then sighed. It was impossible not to have taken the mare’s frown as a sign of frustration, but in a few seconds, she cracked a smirk and waved at Applejack and Rainbow Dash. “Really crazy.”

“Honestly, I’d prefer something farther away.” Applejack took a few steps backwards, then turned around and caught up to Trixie. “Anyway, there are a few dangers near the perimeter of this swamp. It's easier and safer than going past the flame geysers, but it ain't a walk in the park.”

“Seriously?” Trixie froze in place and made eye contact with Applejack, lips tugged into the slightest of frowns. “We should go around the swamp, but ensure we take the shortest distance possible. Besides, what dangers are there? It's not like we'll run into more geysers, right?”

“Just a few traps last I heard. Ponies who’d forage for rare plants only found in these parts would set ‘em up to stall monsters.” Applejack paused for a moment, then adjusted her stetson. “Most of ‘em aren’t used, so they just sit there until someone stumbles onto ‘em. Don’t know why they ain’t disassembled, but can’t blame ‘em for wanting to scram right away.”

“Doesn’t sound fun.” Trixie trotted in place and shivered. She took a deep breath, then touched her chest and tried to relax. “How bad are we talking here? Anything that’s remotely like a bear trap should be avoided at all costs, but a little hole in the ground's nothing.”

Applejack stroked her chin. “According to what I’ve heard, it’s nothing that’ll hurt you too bad, and escaping ‘em is easy enough. They're just nets and ropes and whatnot. Annoying, but they won't maim you, though they can be kinda dangerous if you're reckless.”

“That’s it?” Rainbow Dash muttered, head tilted.

Smiling sheepishly, Applejack rubbed the back of her neck and chuckled.

“Sounds lame. Totally could avoid those things in my sleep.” Rainbow Dash swooped closer to Applejack, but stopped on a dime once she was inches away from crashing into the mare. She donned a confident grin. “Think you’re being a little too careful, Applejack.”

“You sure ‘bout that?” Applejack narrowed her eyes and leaned closer to Rainbow Dash, the former’s nose scrunched. “Last I checked, you haven’t been to the swamp before. Don’t need a reminder of why Lightning Dust was a thorn in your side, right?”

Rainbow Dash nodded with a scrunched nose. “There’s a difference between taking risks and being totally insane.” She dove away from Applejack and stopped right beside a grayish tree whose twigs snapped from the slightest of breezes. “I’ll charge into danger for the good of everypony, but Lightning Dust’s recklessness is just for herself. Big difference.”

“Totally see where you’re coming from,” Trixie deadpanned, eyes narrowed.

“Don’t think there’s too much of a difference,” said Applejack. She marched toward Rainbow Dash, and Trixie was not far behind. “Can’t stop you with a lasso from here, but if you’re that determined to fly through the traps, let me warn y’all before either of you do something stupid.”

Chuckling, Rainbow Dash gently waved a hoof. “When’s the last time I’ve done something stupid?”

“That’s another joke, right?”

“No.” Rainbow Dash blinked a few times and pouted, which earned faint laughs from Trixie. She then took a deep breath and resumed flying around the main swamp, just far enough to where the temperatures and smells weren’t a problem. “Let’s just stick together, okay?”

“I’ve done my share of stupid things, Applejack,” Trixie muttered, then grinned sheepishly. She trotted ahead while Applejack kept close to the magician. “Trixie could’ve made a career out of poor decisions, but I’ve learned from them—” she glanced away from Applejack for a moment “—to the best of my ability.”

“Guessing this’ll be on your list of bad decisions,” Applejack teased.

“Probably." Trixie avoided eye contact with Applejack, forced a laugh, and then gazed back at her colleague. "Don’t get too upset when the inevitable happens.”

With a curious look, Applejack approached the magician. “Then how come you keep doing ‘em?”

Trixie shrugged, a bemused look on her face. “I’m what you’d call impulsive. Maybe not the same kind of impulsive as your friend, but Trixie does feel a desire to stand out.” She sighed, head raised. “Sometimes, my ego gets out of control, and it’d take the most powerful spell in the universe to keep it under control.”

“Is that so?” Applejack rubbed her chin for a moment. “Never would’ve expected to hear that from you, Trixie. Always got the idea you loved gloating and honestly thought you were the best pony in the world.”

Trixie stifled a laugh. “Still have those thoughts when I’m really into the act. Old habits are hard to remove, especially if they make you feel good in the moment. It’s not until hours or days later that you realize the consequences they could’ve wrought.”

“Certainly explains a lot,” Rainbow Dash murmured. She crossed her forelegs and cracked a smile, then continued, “Seems pretty normal so far. Maybe we’ll get around this swamp without something going wrong.”

“Definitely.” Trixie bobbed her head, then studied her surroundings with widened eyes and a faint smirk. A few steps later, she sighed and looked back at the others. “Nothing seems too out of the ordinary, and we haven’t even stumbled onto one of those dumb traps. Besides, how’d you even hide one in this place?”

Applejack cleared her throat. “Watch where you’re going!”

“They probably wouldn’t last in these conditions.” Trixie played with her mane, eyes closed momentarily. She puffed her chest out. “Most ropes aren’t flammable, and the ponies who’d use traps in this place may not even think they’d burn, which—”

“That ain't gonna happen!” Groaning, Applejack rolled her eyes and crossed her forelegs. "The geysers ain't that powerful!"

“What?” Trixie turned to face Applejack with a perplexed look and then froze in place. “I’m just saying that it’s extremely unlikely for your usual rope to withstand such temperatures should a spark land nearby. The geysers are certainly intense enough to where one might reach it.”

Applejack's cheeks flushed, and she furrowed her brow. "Do you—"

As if on cue, a stray spark from one of the geysers fluttered before the three ponies, but disappeared the moment it fell onto the barren earth. Trixie became the center of attention just a second later, Applejack and Rainbow Dash more surprised than anything at how she could’ve gotten such a detail right.

“Trixie is smarter than you think,” Trixie continued as she touched her chest. “While I may have plenty of boneheaded moments, you’d be surprised at what a pony can learn by reading a few books.” She took a step forward, and a harsh snap pierced the air. “It’s—” Trixie’s body was wrapped in a small net and hoisted into the air, and a few of the tree’s twigs snapped in response.

Applejack gasped, head raised as she gazed at the trapped unicorn. “Are you okay?”

“Ugh.” Trixie squirmed for a moment, but it was all for naught as the net became tighter. She gnashed her teeth as the net swung back and forth. “Trixie’s been better.” She nudged her hoof forward and used the tip of her boot to scrape against the net. “Why’s it so tough?”

Groaning, Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and pouted. “Don’t you have—”

Before Rainbow Dash could’ve finished her thought, Trixie fired a few sparks from her horn, and the net broke apart in less than a second. Trixie fell onto the earth with a loud thud, grunts escaped her mouth, and a small cloud of dust lingered around her. In the blink of an eye, the magician pushed herself upright, wincing as she rubbed her left shoulder.

“—magic.”

“Was going to use it to cushion the fall,” Trixie answered as she staggered. She caught her breath, tongue stuck out momentarily. “Unfortunately, Trixie’s reaction time’s not as good as other ponies. Besides, that spell was more of a last resort.”

Rainbow Dash chuckled and playfully nudged Trixie, a cheeky smile across the former’s face. “Totally didn’t take long for you to use it. You’ve changed a lot, but you’re the same impatient mare.”

Trixie’s cheeks became a hot pink. “Don’t need patience to be great and powerful, you know. Besides, Trixie escaped the trap. Just because they’re easy to escape doesn’t mean they’re not frightening!” She grumbled for a moment, then exhaled and tried to relax. "You'd think somepony would deactivate them."

“Were you being careful?" Applejack scolded, teeth clenched momentarily. "Could’ve sworn you wandered into the trap without a care in the world.” She glanced over to Rainbow Dash as the mare hovered in place. “How ‘bout y’all listen to my warnings for once.”

“Technically, we listened to your warnings,” Rainbow Dash said as she raised a hoof. She wore a sheepish smile once Applejack raised an eyebrow. “They were just totally unnecessary—until Trixie wandered into the trap, but that's nothing. We’re doing fine, right?”

Trixie cocked her head, cheeks tightened. “Suppose you have a point, but Trixie would rather not get scared like that a second or third time!” She trudged closer to Rainbow Dash and sighed. “You're right in that we have nothing to worry about right now, but Trixie regrets going here.”

“Just because of one net?” Rainbow Dash shook her head. She swooped closer to Trixie and patted the magician’s shoulder, then sported a slight smirk. “You’re just a little embarrassed. I totally understand, so try not to take it too hard, okay?”

Applejack nodded in an instant. “Rainbow Dash’s got the right idea.” Her lips curled into a smile, and she gently waved at Trixie. “We’ll be fine as long as we’re extra careful ‘round these parts. However, we won't be in the clear until Wheat Stalk’s home comes into view.”

“Hope that’s not too far away,” Trixie said as she wiped her forehead. A sigh then passed through her lips. “Just tell me we’re not going to venture back the way we came. Between getting knocked out by a giant spider and these traps, I’ve—” Trixie shuddered as if she’d seen a ghost “—been having a bad day. This place is the worst!”

“You’re far from alone.” Applejack trotted away from the group with short steps, and the rest followed close behind. She looked back at her colleagues. “There’s a narrow cave that connects Wheat Stalk’s home to the grassland, but there’s a catch.”

“What’d that be?”

Applejack paused for a moment, recalling the time Trixie had faced an Ursa Minor and fled as quickly as possible. She loathed the idea of getting under Trixie’s coat whilst they traversed the swamp, but honesty was the best policy. With a straight face, she looked into Trixie’s eyes and muttered, “The cave has some Ursa Minors.”

Trixie’s coat turned pale. Sweat dripped down her forehead like a waterfall, only to have stopped once she wiped her forehead a second time. “On second thought, let’s go through the swamp a second time when we’re done. I am not reliving that episode another time!”

Shrugging, Rainbow Dash donned a cocky grin and placed her hooves behind her head. “C’mon, what’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“Bravery and suicidal overconfidence are hard to distinguish.” Trixie rolled her eyes and pouted. “You do realize an Ursa Minor has enough strength to crush metal with a single swipe of its claw, right?”

“Great joke, Trixie!” Rainbow Dash chortled and playfully waved a hoof. However, when she noticed Trixie’s slight scowl, the pegasus quivered and donned a nervous frown of her own. “Oh, that wasn’t a joke.”

Groaning, Trixie leaned her head back and wore an even deeper frown than before. “Honestly, part of the reason why we ran toward the geysers, turned around the moment we learned what they’re like, and stumbled onto a bunch of traps was because of your fearlessness!”

“I’m fearless, but that doesn’t make me stupid!” Rainbow Dash retorted, nose scrunched. “You’re the one who fell into one of those traps! We wouldn’t even be having this quibble if it wasn’t for your carelessness!”

“And we wouldn’t be having this argument if it wasn’t for your recklessness!”

“Quiet!” Applejack shouted at the top of her lungs. She stomped her hoof against the earth, and flocks of birds flapped their wings and cawed from afar. Suddenly, everything fell silent, at which point Applejack then caught her breath. "Y'all need to calm down!"

With a perplexed look, Trixie nudged closer to Applejack and muttered, “Trixie doesn’t mean to cause—”

“I know you mean well, but we’re never gonna deliver these pies if y’all keep bickering!” Applejack’s hoof almost touched Rainbow Dash’s shoulder, and she furrowed her brow. “You’re always rushing into danger without thinking, and—” Applejack then pointed at Trixie “—you don’t think ‘bout consequences! You’ve both made boneheaded moves, but I’m not gonna let that bother me unless you two keep whining about it! Guess what y’all have been doing?”

Rainbow Dash and Trixie stared at their acquaintance with slack-jawed expressions, their eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. Neither of them uttered a single word, but merely glanced at each other for a moment before they looked back at Applejack.

Pursing her lips momentarily, Trixie gently kicked the air and lowered her head. “Ugh, there’s no denying it. Looks like the Great and Powerful Trixie might’ve gone a little too far.” She blushed and rubbed the back of her head. Afterwards, she turned to face Rainbow Dash. “Sorry about getting a little—” Trixie raised her hoof and twirled it in a circle “—aggressive with my comments.”

“Guess we’ve got a little more in common than I thought.” Rainbow Dash pressed the tips of her hooves, cheeks flushed. “Heh, sorry about my own—you know.” She ascended a few more inches above the ground. “Totally nothing to worry about, right?”

Applejack walked closer to her colleagues, a smug grin across her face. “Glad to see y’all learned your lesson.” She froze in place, then stroked her chin. “Well, at least you have it fresh in your minds. Ain’t a secret that some ponies need to learn a lesson more than once before it sticks.”

“No kidding.” Rainbow Dash rubbed the back of her head. “Know more than a few ponies who’ve learned the same lesson a ton of times.”

Trixie touched her chest and smirked. “Yours truly is proof that’s accurate.”

“Never thought I’d see humility,” Applejack teased. She waved her hoof and giggled, which earned a few laughs from Rainbow Dash and Trixie. “Reminds me of when Rarity introduced me to Strawberry Sunrise that one time.” She cleared her throat, brow furrowed for a second. “Anyway, I’ll keep an eye out for y’all.”

Nodding, Rainbow Dash pumped her hoof into the air. “Lead the way, Applejack!”

For the first time in what felt like days, Applejack took solace in knowing that the group’s journey had a chance of progressing without too much drama or poor decisions. She widened her smile as she observed her surroundings, then brought her attention back to the world ahead. The horrid smells from before had completely dissipated, and whatever traps appeared were easy enough to avoid, or at least easy enough to where Rainbow Dash and Trixie weren’t caught.

One thought reached the top of Applejack’s mind: ‘Bout time they got along.

Never was Applejack so happy to have seen a small cottage surrounded by some trees. It wasn’t the prettiest abode in the world, especially since the wooden logs seemed rather faded and chipped, but anything would’ve painted a bright smile on a pony’s face when reaching it required going through one of the ugliest places in the world.

Applejack was certain there would’ve been a poor, reckless decision or something unpleasant after her friends learned a lesson, but nevertheless, they found themselves steps away without further trouble.

That wasn’t to say there weren’t any issues.

“Please tell me we’re almost done,” Trixie muttered as she panted. She slouched a little and exhaled, lips curled into a frown that tugged at her cheeks. However, once the group reached the cabin’s doorstep, a smile ran across her face. “If we’re roped into something else, you may need to carry me.”

Applejack covered her mouth and chuckled. “Don’t think y’all need to worry.” She knocked on the cabin’s front door, clacks echoed around the group, and she then turned to face Rainbow Dash and Trixie. “Wheat Stalk ain’t the kind of pony who’d work us silly. He’s an understanding feller, and if he’s gonna make us go through another obstacle course, I’ll make sure—”

Creaks split the air. Applejack turned around and made eye contact with Wheat Stalk as the latter held the door open. Strands of his blonde, dandruff-covered mane went in all kinds of directions. The odor which emanated from his body smelled like onions, his beard could’ve hid an entire forest’s worth of fruit, yet that toothy smile of his had a palpable charm. He slapped his foreleg as Applejack and company stepped back, smiles on their faces.

“Took you long enough, Miss Apple!” Wheat Stalk teased. He tapped Applejack’s stetson, and the latter’s cheeks flushed as she smiled sheepishly. Wheat Stalk widened his own smile. “Have trouble with some of those critters again?”

“Just one of the giant spiders,” Applejack replied, then touched her chest. “Saved a mare’s life, and she agreed to join my friend and me on our journey.” Pausing, she stepped back and pointed at Trixie. “Here’s the mare whose life I saved, Trixie.” She pointed at Rainbow Dash with the same hoof. “This is one of my closest friends, Rainbow Dash.”

“It’s an honor to meet you,” Trixie said as she bowed at Wheat Stalk. “The Great and Powerful Trixie has heard more than a few things about you. However, I must ask an important question.” She raised her head and gazed into Wheat Stalk’s eyes. “Those traps weren’t yours, right?”

Wheat Stalk stifled a laugh, sweat dripped down his forehead, and he looked away from Trixie. “Whatever gave you that idea, miss? They’re just stuff a few—” he twirled his hoof in a circle “—a few brave explorers placed in the swamp to help them against its many creatures! They forgot to disarm them!”

“Not the best lie Trixie has heard, but whatever. No point in dragging this on for an hour.” Trixie gently nodded and raised an eyebrow. “Lastly, why you’re making us go through the swamp instead of yourself?”

“The agreement, Trixie,” Applejack and Wheat Stalk said in unison.

Smiling sheepishly, Trixie fiddled with her cape, but it wasn’t long before she regained her composure. She took a deep breath and stood as tall as possible. “Trixie apologizes for the rudeness.”

“Pretty sure you get that question asked a lot,” Rainbow Dash added with a slight grin. She landed on all fours for the first time in hours and made her way toward Wheat Stalk. “Anyway, my friend has your apple pies. Try not to go through ‘em so quickly this time.”

Applejack nodded in an instant. She opened her saddlebag and withdrew four small boxes, each one containing an masterfully baked pie. The sweet, fruity aroma still permeated from the box, and as Applejack presented them to Wheat Stalk, drool escaped the latter’s mouth.

“Hope you like ‘em,” Applejack said as she placed the pies on Wheat Stalk’s doorstep. Before she could’ve inched away from the treats, Wheat Stalk wrapped his hooves around the stack and quickly pulled them into the cottage. She shuddered in surprise at first, but soon gave her acquaintance a laugh.

Wheat Stalk pranced in place and licked his lips, unable to contain his excitement. “Are you kidding? These pies are the best in all of Equestria!” He wiped his mouth. “If it weren’t for the darn swamp getting in my way so often, I’d get some every day!”

Applejack looked behind her shoulder and to Rainbow Dash and Trixie. While she knew they wouldn’t have appreciated the idea of something else worming its way into their schedule, there was nothing saying they couldn’t have returned home if something came up. She donned a warm smile and gave her friends a nod, then looked back at Wheat Stalk.

“Anything else you need?” Applejack asked as she stood tall. “I’d be glad to help out!”

“Same couldn’t be said for me,” Trixie whispered, chuckling as she touched her chin. “The Great and Powerful Trixie has some—” she blushed and rubbed her right cheek “—some illusions that need practice! That’s it! My sincerest apologies, Wheat Stalk.”

“How should I put this?” Wheat Stalk stroked his beard, eyes narrowed and shoulders sagged. He then pointed at the group and lowered his head. “Gonna need as many ponies as possible to help. You won’t have to cross the Flame Geyser Swamp again, but if you’re too busy, that’s okay!”

“Sounds easy!” Rainbow Dash shouted as she swung her foreleg. “What’s the problem?”

“We’re gonna collect some crystal fruit in the cave behind my house.” Wheat Stalk paused as he noticed Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Trixie’s coats becoming paler in the blink of an eye. He chortled. “I’m just kidding! You’re free to do whatever!”

Applejack stifled another laugh. “Alright, that’s enough jokes for one day. Take care, Wheat Stalk!”

“You too!”

Wheat Stalk slammed the door shut, the three ponies outside shuddered in response, and the next thing they heard was Wheat Stalk’s explosive cheers from within the cottage. A few stomps echoed in the air, but everything became silent moments later.

Trixie raised an eyebrow and tilted her head. “What a strange pony.”

“That ain’t even the strangest part,” said Applejack.

“What is?” Rainbow Dash asked with a confused look. She crept closer to Applejack until their shoulders almost touched. "Not much weirder than a pony who loves pies so much, he'll consider sending a pony across that swamp for some each week or two."

Applejack glanced away from Rainbow Dash, but looked back at her and smiled sheepishly. “Don’t think you wanna know.”