Poison Joke'd

by Sky Blue Scratch

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Discord, Princess Celestia, Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders
Length: 3101

Discord Decides to Make it rain poison Joke for April Foals Day.

Discord thinks it would be most amusing if he made it rain poison joke on April foals day.

If only he remembered that he himself was not immune.

Published 2018-01-22 05:30:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-04-14 03:14:15 UTC

Before The Chaos

It was April Foals day in Equestria tomorrow, and the Lord of Chaos himself could not come up with any plans of destruction.

"Damn!!" He said out loud. How could he, Discord, possibly not have an idea?? Furious with himself, he floated lazily out of his home.

Reminding himself that he needed an idea for an *all-Equestrian* prank, he teleported into Celestia's face.

Celestia screamed at the sight of the draconequus and quickly hid her cake out of sight. Seeing the gesture, discord grabbed the cake and waved it under Celestia's Nose.

"Busted" He Laughed. The white alicorn scowled as Discord devoured her cake. Her Cake!! She Grimaced as the cake was swallowed whole and Discord wiped his fingers on her mane.

"What do you want" she scowled, attempting to remove the remnants of frosting from her hair. Discord smirked.

"Oh, you know, the usual. Just a small idea for a small prank that i'm going to cast on the SMALL land of Equestria. Nothing much." He Smiled evilly at the princesses gaping mouth.

"You can't!!!!! Equestria is NOT your plaything. I know its April foals day though..." she added thoughtfully.

Accepting this as Permission to do his thing, he asked Celestia again.

"So you don't Have any Idea's? Because i'm KINDA hoping that you'll tell me something that i cant do just so that i can do it. You know, just to annoy you."

She raised one of her eyebrows in confusion and he accepted this as a no. "Ah well, Guess I'm just going to have to ask some pony else."

Seeing the look on Celestia's face, he took the opportunity to teleport out, leaving the unsuspecting princess a new cake and a bouquet of brilliant blue flowers.

***

Teleporting directly into Luna's office, he quickly looked around for the blue mare. Not seeing the princess, he teleported all over the palace looking for her. In the kitchen, the bathroom, the dining hall, even in the palace gardens.

He finally found her deeply submerged in one of the boring law books in the boring law section in the Library.

"Hello Lulu!!" he yelled, causing all the surrounding ponies to glare at him.

Briefly looking up from her work, Luna said "We'll talk outside, Discord." before getting up, putting the BORING law book inside her saddle bag and trotting outside. Discord floated after her.

"Sooooooo Lulu, do you have any ideas on *All-Equestrian* Pranks for April Foals day??? I really need some ideas because i'm fresh out of them, used my last one yesterday when I removed Rarity's mane. Have you any?" Discord asked.

Luna Glared at him. "Make it rain Candle wax." She said.
"But that is so cliche. Any Others?" Discord asked hopefully.

Luna groaned. "Turn all the flowers in Equestria into Umbrellas. I don't Know. Just LEAVE ME ALONE."

With a huff, The princess of the moon trotted back into the library, leaving a very disappointed Discord behind.

***

Trying to think if he had any more ponies to pester for ideas, he teleported into the Everfree forest, intending to ask his zebra friend for ideas, instead coming across the blue flower he'd given Celestia Earlier.

He wondered if she'd realized if it was poison joke yet.

***

An angry white earth Pony stormed through the corridors of Canterlot Palace, Yelling at the top of her voice.

"Luna!!!" she screamed, "LUNA give back my horn and wings right now!!!"

Luna, who was in the library, heard the screeches of her sister and teleported to her location.
"Sister, what is wrong?" The blue pony questioned.

The furious white pony fumed."What did you do with my horn and wings Luna?" Luna was puzzled, because she didn't do anything with Celestia's Horn and wings.

Luna understood almost Immediately.

"Sister" The Alicorn spoke " I did not touch your wings, but I do know what happened to them. Did you confront Discord when he came to Canterlot this morning?"

Celestia thought for a moment. " Why yes, i did actually."
Celestia too understood.

"Poison Joke. The bouquet that Discord Gave me was poison joke. That Nasty son of a DONKEY."

***

Discord was stumped. He had no ideas but he still attempted to rack his brains. His thoughts drifted back to that morning, when he'd given Celestia the Poison Joke, and Luna had tried to give him ideas. "Make it rain Candle wax" she'd said.

THAT'S IT Discord thought. He'd Combine the two ideas, and he would make it RAIN poison Joke!!!

He Grinned Evilly, then got ready to unleash the joke of poison to Equestria on April Foals Day.

Author's Note

:trollestia: I've Been Thinking of this story for AGES.
I've Finally Published the first Chapter and I hope that every one enjoys!! :derpytongue2:

ALSO I did the cover art myself :twilightsmile:

The Chaos Begins

When Every pony awoke the next day, the sky started to spit out blue petals.

No Pony realized what it truly was, and every pony just thought that some Pegasus decided to make the sky spit out blue petals instead of water for April foals day.

Twilight Sparkle, however, was extremely suspicious.

Her lavender coat was brushed with the petals as she galloped through Ponyville, collecting as many samples as her magic could hold. (Which, it turned out, was quite a lot of petals).

She galloped back to the library as fast as the possibly could and scanned the petals with her magic, trying to find out what they were.

She gasped loudly when she found out.

***

Discord awoke with a start. Looking around his chaotic home, he remembered his devilish plan. He Smiled widely.
"Lets go find out if any pony found out my scheme!"

And he teleported away.

Straight into Fluttershy's face. She squealed, then jumped out of sight.

She too had been brushed with the brilliant blue petals he had fallen from the sky, and it too had affected her. Her legs were much shorter, and and her mane was 3 times the length that it was meant to be.

She looked like a little filly, except with a full sized head and body and an extra long mane. She was rather adorable. Discord had to keep himself from gushing.

The yellow Pegasus refused to come out from behind the couch behind which she was hiding. She merely spoke from behind, and started to growl at an amused Discord.

"How dare you!" The animal lover cried " YOU made the entirety of ponyville rain poison joke!! Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

The draconequus smiled. "Oh my dear Fluttershy, don"t you worry your pretty little head off. I did it to the rest of Equestria too!"

Fluttershy then fainted into the lord of chaos's arms.

***

The ponies of Manehatten were in full out panic mode. The moment the blue petals started to fall from the sky, a famous scientist had recognized them and had run for his life.

The rest of Manehatten had followed suit.

Everypony was was screeching at the strange effects of this magical flower.

Horns of unicorns all around had either turned into ice-cream cones, flopped around uselessly or grown 10 times longer than they were meant to be.

Pegasi were attempting to fly with wings made of paper, wobbling around the sky with wings of two different dimensions, and even were flailing around with 4 or 5 wings attached in the weirdest of places.

Earth ponies were having trouble walking with legs made of sticks, wobbling around on two legs and even rolling about with no legs at all!

While Discord viewed this chaos with a smirk on his face, the ponies around started to flog to doctors, scientists, or any pony who may have known what these strange blue flowers were.

The scientists, doctors, and the knowledgeable ponies obliged instantly, asking each other for a cure. Of course, no pony had a cure, so they flogged to books instead.

Twilight would have been proud.

***

Meanwhile, across Equestria, everypony seemed to be having the same issues. Out in Fillydelphia, the ponies were having similar reactions to the magical properties of this plant.

A mother pony with her son came trotting along, the mother trying to shepherd her son around the petals.

Unfortunately, the young pony had taken an interest to the petals, and contently put one into his mouth. The mother shrieked for her son, attempting to remove the petal from his mouth.

The son did not know that it was poison joke. Nor did he know that the flower works its magic quicker if it touches your spit.

The effect was almost immediate. The son's age started to reduce rapidly, causing him to get younger by the second. The young stallion started to cry.

The Mare instantly went to comfort her baby son, who was getting younger by the second.

The blue flowers were already touching her, causing her ears to grow as long as a donkey's. She did not care one bit. Her only focus was on her son, who had now stopped shrinking.

He was now the size and age of a newborn filly. She rushed him off to the doctor, who also has distorted body parts, and frantically explained her situation.

The doctor understood fully, because the clinic was currently full of broken ponies who were having a similar situation. He comforted the fretting mare, explaining the senario.

She prayed, with all her heart, that no one in Equestria was having any worse situatons.

Oh, how wrong she was.

***

In another part of Equestria, ponies all over the place were having just as worse problems.

A group of ponies were struggling to contain a rampaging filly the size of a house. Some frantic ponies the size of ants galloped as fast as their hooves could take them away from a butterfly.

A unicorn filly looked down at her hooves, which were now covered in a strange writing.

Another filly was, to much dismay of her parents, jabbering away in rapid french.

The whole of Equestria was in full out chaos, and Discord was loving it. He grinned with glee at the chaos.

A curious filly was tugging at her father's mane, frantic for an answer as to what was going on.

"Poison joke" came the reply. Discord smiled at this. The poor filly's mane and tail was missing.

Discord thought that the prank was going wonderfly.

***

Meanwhile in Ponyville a frantic Twilight Sparkle (Green coat and all) was flicking through her books at 300 miles per hour, page to page, book to book.

The unicorn knew what these strange flowers were, and she knew what the cure was. She just needed to simultaniasly administer it to everypony in Equestria.

A frazzled Fluttershy had visited not ten minutes ago, an explained what Discord had done to Equestria.

The now-green unicorn had gone at once to the spa for the cure, only to have a closed sign put in her face.

She had also gone to Zecora, only to be greeted by a spotted-not-striped-FURIOUS zebra who was refusing to brew anything.

She sighed. Maybe she could ask Discord. DISCORD! she thought, feeling a rush of anger for the draconequus, that nasty son of a ....

Discord poofed into the library, causing a startled green Twilight to jump.

"Why hello, Twilight! How are you?" A smirking Discord asked. Twilight scowled for a moment before turning to face Discord.

She gasped, looking at the creature and starting to form her lips into her own smirk.

Discord frowned. "What is it?" Twilight laughed.

"Well" she spoke slowly and confidently. "Did you check your own immunity before you made it rain poison joke?"

"What?

"Well, Discord, hate to tell you, but the poison joke that came from the sky has also affected you, silly"

Discord gaped at her. "It did?"

She smirked at a startled Discord. "Yep, and now, you happen to be a pony"

Discord's only reaction was -"WHAT!!!"

Author's Note

Hey!! Hope all enjoyed the second chapter. :pinkiehappy:

PLEASE comment if you enjoyed!! :yay:

I will get out chapters as quick as I can!! :derpytongue2:

During the Chaos

Discord stared at his grey now-pony-body. He shrieked in panic, and Twilight laughed.

He felt all around his new form. He still had his two different horns, and his cutie mark was the symbol of chaos (look it up). He still had his goatee and he summoned a mirror to look at it.

Discord looked over his new form in the mirror. He noticed that he was an earth pony. He freaked out at this small detail.

He grabbed twilight in his hooves and shook her like a salt-shaker. So much like a salt-shaker, in fact, that salt started to come out of her back hooves. She glared at the large pile of salt that was starting to materialize on the floor.

"Discord!" she yelled. "CALM DOWN". Discord dropped her into the large pile of salt. She gagged.

"Discord, what's so wrong with being a pony?" Twilight questioned, attempting to climb out of the salt. "Me and my friends and family have lived their whole lives as a pony, what's so wrong with that?"

Discord again looked himself over in the mirror. "I never realized that ponies are so ugly."

Twilight glared at him. "Well," she growled, "If us ponies are SO ugly, why don't you just change yourself back?"

Discord turned around to look at the green unicorn. "I INVENTED poison joke, and I didn't want to make it so easy to remove the effects."

Twilight laughed again. "Well then, just go to somepony else for a cure."

Before he left, Discord shook twilight again, this time bringing forth pepper from her back legs. He dropped her into the mountain of pepper. She sneezed.

***

As a discorded pony disappeared from the golden oak library, Twilight looked helplessly at her pile of pepper on the ground. How did she get into this sticky situation?

As the unicorn thought furiously about how to remove the pile of pepper, she heard a quiet voice coming from just outside the library.

"Twilight? Are ya in there? Ah seem to have gotten mahself into a pickle..." The voice of Applejack said quietly. Aj's voice seemed to be coming from upstairs, so the unicorn climbed with difficulty out of the enormous pile of pepper to see out from the balcony.

Aj had indeed been affected by the blue flower, but she wasn't Appletiny.

She was Applehuge.

AppleJack was the size of a house, if not bigger, and was having trouble not stepping on the ponies that were passing by.

"Twilight! So glad you're here! Is this poison joke? Ah don't know what's happened, but Applebloom's in tears, and ah..."

"Calm down, Aj. I was just about to go down to the forest and gather some ingredients for the cure. I just have to find out how to administer it to everypony in Equestria simultaneously. Don't worry, we'll fix this mess, Aj!"

Aj sighed miserably, and began to walk slowly and carefully away. Before she was out of earshot, however, she heard Twilight mumble something about pepper.

***

A discorded pony appeared in canterlot, and everypony looked at him. He smiled sheepishly, before galloping in the direction of the palace.

When he finally arrived, the guards all looked at him strangely, and as he neared the entrance to the throne room, a couple of unicorn guards stopped him.

"Sorry, sir, but we can't let you in without an appointment."

Discord gasped loudly. So loudly, in fact, that a bald Luna came to answer the door.

"Discord" She scowled, and grabbed him by the ear. She dragged him by the ear all the way to a quiet nook where nopony would overhear them.

"Discord! I was joking when I said to make it rain candle wax! I was joking when I said anything to do with April Foals day! You should have known that you nasty son of a..."

"Now now, Princess, Twilight Sprinkle should be brewing up a cure as we speak. I overheard her talking to the farm pony about it"

"It's Sparkle, Discord, and you should know that. Now I suggest that you scram before Tia sees you, or you're going to be banished to the moon. Now go!"

Luna looked around hurriedly, and galloped back to the throne room just as discord teleported the heck outta there.

***

Twilight was stirring the green concoction that was the cure for poison joke just as Rainbow dash came in.

She was a unicorn.

"Twilight! I need help! I'm a unicorn now! What's going on! I don't know...."

"Rainbow! Calm down! If you're not blind, you should see that right this minute I'm stirring up a cure! Go tell the others that I want them all here now!"

Rainbow nodded dutifully, and galloped of to gather the other element bearers.

Twilight looked sadly at her potion, wondering if it would be enough for the whole of Equestria.

***

At Sweet apple acres, things weren't going so well.

A crying Applebloom could not stop her hooves from running, and was galloping in circles. Big Macintosh had become Little Macintosh, and Granny Smith had no legs.

AppleJack looked at her frazzled family, and hoped that the other element bearers were faring better that she was.

***

Poor Pinkie Pie had lost all of her magic, and was struggling to contain the cake twins. Pumpkin Cake was now a pegasus and Pound Cake was now a unicorn.

Mr and Mrs Cake had swapped genders, and were struggling to get the hang of their new bodies.

Magicless Pinkie was hoping like cotton candy that the other element bearers were doing better than she was.

***

At Rarity's Boutique, poor Sweetie Belle was now a pegasus and was not faring very well.

Rarity was also a pegasus and was struggling to maintain her shop.

She hoped and hoped that none of her friends were having a worse time than she was.

***

Twilight looked down at the three fillies that had come to the library. Not to borrow books, but to help her with her potion making.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER POTION DISTRIBUTORS!!!"

Author's Note

Hi Y'all!

Sorry This chapter took SOOOOOO long to come out, life was just getting to me and I was sick.:pinkiesick:

Hope all enjoy this chapter! :twilightsmile:

Please comment and like if you enjoy! :derpytongue2:

Tell me if there is any grammatical errors I can fix! :twistnerd: