Pinkie Pie is Replaced by The Babadook

by King of Madness

Rating: teen
Tags: Mrs. Cake, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Other, Starlight Glimmer, Thriller, Random, Crossover
Length: 2376

Starlight has to help a demonic entity bake goods.

Starlight is sent to help out at Sugercube Corner. This wouldn't be an issue if it wasn't for the fact that her boss for the day is the demonic personification of grief.

Part of the Vertigo/Madness Writing Challenge. Check out the story I challenged Vertigo to write: Rarity and the Quest for the Legendary Spool of Thread.

Published 2018-01-19 03:50:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-01-19 03:50:06 UTC

If it's in a word or it's in a look...

"For today's friendship lesson, you'll be helping Pinkie Pie in the bakery."

That's what Twilight had told her.

"Uhhh, are you sure Applejack doesn't need any more help with her farm? Or Rarity with her boutique? Or anypony else with anything else?"

"Oh, don't be silly, Starlight. It's just baking. Once Pinkie shows you the ropes, you'll get the hang of it in no time!"

"It's not the baking part I'm nervous about."

The past conversation played in Starlight's head as she stood in front of Sugarcube Corner. She took a deep breath. "Let's just get this over with." She walked over and pushed through the doors.

"Pinkie? Oh, don't worry, Starlight. Pinkie is a bit... odd, but she's not so bad."

"Ehhh... Well, I trust you, Twilight, but... There's just something about her."

Starlight slowly made her way to the counter, the sound of her hoofs hitting the floor practically echoing in her ears. Once she was at the counter, she was greeted by Mrs. Cake.

"Why, hello, Starlight. Twilight told me you were here to help out today."

"Yep. That's what I'm here for." Starlight said awkwardly with a fake smile.

"I'll show you to the kitchen then."

Starlight walked around the counter and followed Mrs. Cake into the kitchen.

"I understand what you mean, but this is part of friendship: looking past oddities. I mean, when I first started making friends here, you wouldn't believe how many times I questioned why I was friends with Rainbow Dash."

"Heh, yeah... Well, I guess I'll just have to, uhh, look past the oddities."

"That's the spirit!"

"Alright, now that you're all set, I'll just let you and Pinkie handle the rest." Mrs. Cake said after getting Starlight acquainted with everything.

Starlight contemplated asking Mrs. Cake to stay, but bit her tongue and put on a smile. Once Mrs. Cake walked out and the door closed, Starlight quickly found the world to be too quiet all the sudden. She slowly turned and looked around the kitchen. As far as she could tell, she was the only one in the room. All the same, she could feel that she wasn't alone.

She bit her lip and went to the sink to wash her hooves. Once she was done, she turned around and saw a red book on the counter that had certainly not been there before. She hesitated for a few seconds before walking to the counter. She looked down at the book. On the red cover was a black humanoid figure that appeared to have claws on it's hands and a hat on it's head. Above the figure, written in black, was the title: Pinkie Pie.

"Alright, well, I guess I'll go then."

"Oh, one more thing!"

"What?"

"Just... make sure you follow Pinkie's instructions very closely. Getting them wrong will make her... angry."

Starlight took a deep breath and opened the book.

On the first two pages, there was that same humanoid creature, now more detailed than the silhouette as seen on the cover. Big wide eyes and a gaping maw detailed it's white face. One of it's clawed hands popped up from the book and Starlight found, through pulling a little piece of paper, that she could make the hand wave.

My name is Pinkie Pie, the Babadook
and this is my cook book.

Starlight rolled her eyes and turned the page.

On the next two pages, there was a drawing of a pony with a curly mane and tail at a counter similar to the one Starlight was standing at. She was happily stirring a bowl of batter from the looks of it. Pulling another little piece of paper gave the stirring motion.

Take two cups of flour
that is how you start the mix
Add a little something sweet, not sour
A bit of salt, just a pinch
The yoke of an egg
A teaspoon of vanilla
Plenty more sugar
They must get their fill of...

"Ooookay?" Starlight was a bit confused by some of the instructions, but would do as she was told to the best of her understanding. She lit her horn and started to levitated a mixing bowl over when a loud thud startled her and caused her to drop it. The light in the room dimmed for a few seconds before returning to their original light. Starlight looked around frantically before her eyes rested on the book. She felt something inside her telling her to turn the page and did so.

In the next pages, the pony was still at the counter and now resembled Starlight and her smile had been replaced by a frown. Her hooves were on the ground, but there was still a little piece of paper that gave the stirring motion in the bowl, obviously meaning the use of magic. The other detail was the huge dark figure behind the pony; it's wide eyes staring down at her and it's clawed hands reaching for her.

Starlight gasped and quickly spun around. To her relief, there was nothing behind her. She put a hoof to her chest and took several deep breaths. Once she had managed her breathing, she slowly turned back around, half-expecting to see it standing on the other side of the counter. It wasn't. She looked down at the book and read the pages.

Using magic to bake?
Oh, SHAME on you
To bake, you must do
how the Earth ponies do
No magic, no tricks
The physical action of old
If you are a wise pony,
you will do as you're TOLD

The foolish part of Starlight wanted to question what the big deal was, but she was smart enough to not cater to it. Twilight's words echoed in her head.

"Just... make sure you follow Pinkie's instructions very closely. Getting them wrong will make her... angry."

"Alright. Got it." Starlight nodded and got back to business. Nearly using her magic again, Starlight mentally slapped herself and grabbed the bowl with her teeth. The turned back a page and got all the ingredients together. Although it was difficult to suddenly start using her mouth and hooves for everything and she made a few messes that she immediately cleaned up each time for fear that Pinkie wouldn't like it, Starlight held back her magic and eventually got it done. "Phew. Well, that's one thing out of the way." She turned the page and quickly turned to the next page to avoid looking at the picture of a monster standing behind her.

On the the next page, the curly-maned pony was pouring the batter into a cupcake/muffin pan. On the page next to it, she was putting the it into the oven. The little piece of paper gave the motion for putting the pan in said oven. However, Starlight noticed something else. There was a hat poking out from behind the oven and a clawed hand clutching the side of it. Starlight slowly turned her head to look at the oven; nothing out of the ordinary.

Pour the batter into the pan
12 cups for the cakes
But first, cover it with nonstick spray
Then you're ready to bake
350, that's where the dial should be
Then put it in for you and me
14 minutes on the dot
Get it done, don't miss a spot

"Oh, jeez." Inwardly complaining about how much easier this would be with magic, Starlight sprayed the pan, picked up the bowl with her hooves and gently poured the batter into the pan cups. A few paper towels later, it was all ready. She set the dial on the oven and put the pan in. She grabbed a timer with her magic, but quickly remembered that was a no-no and set it down before using her hooves to set it for fourteen minutes. She wiped sweat from her brow, accidentally smearing batter across her forehead. "Heh... That wasn't so hard."

She turned around and started to walk off when a terrible scratching sound filled the room. She dropped the front half of her body so she could cover her ears. After a few seconds, the sound ended. Starlight got up and turned to face the stove. She cautiously examined the oven and found scratch marks on the side. "...Right."

She returned to the book and decided to go ahead and turn to the next page. What she saw made her freeze in place, her eyes glued to the pages before her.

The next two pages showed the dark figure, bigger than before and with it's eyes pure white, reaching for the pony that resembled Starlight. The pony appeared to be screaming.

I HOPE that you LISTENED
My WORDS did you HEED?
I simply ASKED you to BAKE
It is NOT a hard DEED

The paged turned by itself. The next pages showed a popup the creature throttling the pony. The pony's body was jerking around as if she was trying to release herself from the demon's grip. Starlight felt a tightness around her neck. The creature seemed to be smiling.

It BetTer HAd bEen DonE RIgHt
DId yOU Do as YoU ReAD?
BeCUasE IF yoU DIDn'T...

The page turned. The popup creature was holding the oven. It opened. The pony was inside, surrounded by fire. Snakes and horned creatures bathed in her torment. Screams and crying echoed in Starlight's head.

YOU'RE GOING TO WISH YOU WERE DEAD

With a jerk, Starlight picked up the book with her magic and threw it across the kitchen. It smacked against the wall and fell to the floor. Her legs shaking, she fell on her haunches and stared at the book. For a long time, she just sat there and stared; her heavy breaths being the only thing that filled the silence. She didn't know how long she stayed like that until...

Ding!

Starlight shot to her feet and snapped her head towards the sound to find it was only the timer. Still not recovered from her near heart attack, she turned off the oven and opened it up. She nearly used her teeth to pull out the pan before remembering it would burn her mouth. She put on a pair of oven mitts and brought out the cupcakes. Starlight stared at the pastries for a long moment before closing her eyes and taking a very deep breath.

She turned and, to her horror, found the book back on the counter, turned to the page she had left off on. Despite not wanting to have anything to do with that book, she could feel inside her that she had to read on. She would just leave, but she knew the Pinkie would be very angry if she did, which was not a risk she wanted to take. With her magic, she flipped to the next page from where she stood so that she wouldn't have to see that horrible image again. She returned to the counter and looked over the book.

On these pages, the curly-maned pony was putting icing and sprinkles on her cupcakes; an icing squeezer in one hoof and a sprinkle shaker in the other. There was a little piece of paper that Starlight guessed would make the pony shake to two implements, but she didn't bother with finding out.

Now, it is time for the final part
Some icing for flavor, some sprinkles for fun
A good amount for each little cake
Then it's over and done

Wanting out of this horror movie as soon as possible, Starlight grabbed the icing and sprinkles. Careful to not mess up and make a mess, she coated each cupcake with what she figured was a good amount of each condiment. After that, she turned the page of the book to find that she had indeed reached the end.

Figuring it was safe now, Starlight used her magic to put the cakes on a platter and left the kitchen with them. She sat the treats on the counter and was greeted by Mrs. Cake.

"Oh my..." Mrs. Cake looked over the unicorn, able to tell that something shook up the filly. "...I'm terribly sorry, Starlight. With your past, I should have known that you would carry a lot of guilt. It made you vulnerable to her."

"It's fine. I just... I just wanna go home."

"Of course. Well, thank you for your help today. Let me at least pay you for your troubles." Mrs. Cake turned and started collecting bits from the register.

Starlight sighed and looked around at the ponies enjoying their desserts. Her eyes landed on an empty table at the far corner of the room. Standing in the shadows on the other side of the table was a dark humanoid creature dressed in a coat and hat. A smile was plastered on it's pale face as it waved to her with it's clawed hand.

Starlight jumped in place, but the creature vanished as she blinked.

Mrs. Cake finished and turned to see Starlight staring at the corner. The two then heard a door shut from the kitchen. Mrs. Cake cleared her throat and paid Starlight. "Hear you go, sweetie."

Starlight nodded as she took the money. "Thanks. I'm gonna put it to good use; namely an immediate trip to the spa."

Mrs. Cake smiled at her. "Sounds lovely."

With that, Starlight got her flank the heck out of there.

Once she was gone, Mrs. Cake looked to the kitchen doors.

Mrs. Cake pulled open the basement door and made her way down the steps, carrying a bowl of worms with her mouth. Despite doing this every day, she'd be lying if she said it still didn't still creep her out. She quickly went to the center of the room, illuminated by a small window letting light in. She set down the bowl and looked to the unnatural blackness before her. She took a few steps back before Pinkie came out.

Pinkie leaped from the shadows and stopped in front of Mrs. Cake. After a short stare down, Pinkie retreated back into the shadows, dragging the bowl of worms with her.

Mrs. Cake sighed and made her way out of the basement, locking it once she was out.