Author's Note

This is literally like how Regret ended up, in which the final product is heavily different from the fantasy it's based off. Regret was supposed to be the character getting into an accident and having amnesia, to which Rainbow falls in love with him. It was the same thing, only he got rekt with knives. Same thing here,
only with magic. *snort*

Fun fact: In the fantasy this is based off of, Clanks didn't even exist. Hopefully you don't find him unnecessary.

When Celestia Learned The Truth

"So you're absolutely sure you're alright, Darling?" Rarity asked after a lapse of casual conversation.

I gave her a nod. "I'm a little tired, but overall, I feel fine. Nothing hurts except my brain, I guess," I said to her, giving a subtle laugh. Princess Luna left a few minutes after I started to tell my stories, volunteering to tend to Canterlot so it "wasn't completely defenseless." Celestia stayed because she wanted to be completely sure I was feeling fine, and I didn't complain.

"You must've been so alone," Fluttershy mentioned, sympathy washed over her face.

"I definitely was," I answered. "But that's why I made Clanks. If it wasn't for him, I think I would've gone insane."

It wasn't as funny as I wanted it to be, but they all laughed at their own pace. I was glad they were smiling and having a good time, relieved that I was back home. Seeing them not smiling at all was always hard when the occasion had it.

Starlight, on the other hoof...she was smiling and laughing along, but it seemed forced, like she was trying to feel happy, but just couldn't. I brushed a hoof against her shoulder gently, and she looked at me.

"Are you okay?' I asked her, concerned, but she nodded. "Are you sure? You don't seem like you're very happy."

"I am happy," Starlight insisted, "really, I am. I just..."

"What is it?"

Starlight looked at me with her face no longer holding the forced smile, but showing her true emotion, concern and worry, fear even.

"We got so lucky with what happened. What if you never figured out how to get back and you were just drifting forever in space? What if we never sent you there and you just...died? At one point, I thought you were dead. I thought I killed you and your body got zapped to a place where we'd never find it, and I'd just spend the rest of my life wondering whether or not..."

Her explanation turned into rambling as her voice started to crack, and she choked up tears. Her fears all got to her, and the girls nearly intervened, but I firmly held the mare in place.

"Starlight," I demanded with a kind voice, "look at me."

Starlight looked up at me, her blue eyes shining, freshly wet with tears.

"I'm here," I said to her. "I'm right here, in front of you, holding you. I didn't die, and I don't plan on dying anytime soon. It was not your fault I ended up where I was. Don't beat yourself up over this, please. Trust me, I'm okay."

The mare looked at me for a few seconds, her mouth hanging open before beginning to speak. "How can I trust that?"

"Because I'm your best friend," I reminded her, "and best friends don't turn their backs on each other, no matter how bad it ever gets. And I will never turn my back on you."

Starlight looked at me with another smile before pulling herself onto me just to hug me again, holding in her tears. I whispered to her that it was all okay, that it would all be fine.

"Quite the smooth talker, aren't you?" Rainbow quipped, before being elbowed by Applejack. Starlight and I both laughed at the remark.

A moment later, the door opened and in came Doctor Stable, returning as planned. "I hope I'm not intruding on anything," he said.

"Of course not," I assured. "Come in. You said you wanted to check my vitals?"

"Yes." He then turned to the others and added, "You don't have to leave, but I would appreciate it if you didn't interrupt the checkup."

"Of course, Doctor," Celestia said with an understanding tone.

"Go on," I urged to Starlight, who eventually pulled away from me and went over to sit with the rest of the group. Spike hopped off the bed and did the same.

Stable pulled out his stethoscope and started to feel my heartbeat, asking me the typical questions of 'How do you feel' and telling me to take deep breaths, and I only repeated what I said to the others, that I was feeling fine.

"Well," he began, "you don't seem to be having any heart problems. No palpitations of any sort. I overheard a bit of your conversation from earlier through the door, if you don't mind my 'eavesdropping'..." I smiled and shook my head, not minding at all. "...but you said you didn't have any desire to sleep or eat at all?"

"That's right," I answered. "It was like my need food, water, and sleep just disappeared. I spent all that time just kind of...well, reading."

"I see." Stable looked at me up and down. "Well, your vitals seem to be in check, but your brain seems to have suffered a bit of damage, seemingly from whatever you did to get back here."

"Is it bad?" I immediately asked, concerned for my own wellbeing. Stable waved the question off with a hoof.

"Not very, nor is it permanent. It seems to be nothing more than temporary amnesia."

"Amnesia?"

He nodded. "It's likely that you've forgotten some memories upon the return trip, or very well forgotten them after you came back. Do you remember what happened before you lost consciousness?"

I rested a hoof on my chin trying to remember, but nothing seemed to come up. "No. After I used the spell in the black hole, it just all comes up as a blank."

"Excuse me...black hole?"

I waved a hoof. "Long story. So...how long will this last? You said it isn't permanent."

"That's right," Stable reminded me. "Temporary amnesia lasts as long as between a day and a few weeks, though I've had cases where it lasts longer than that. That being said, your memories, whatever you lost, should be coming back relatively soon."

"That's good. Maybe not the whole 'longer than usual' part, but after everything I've gone through, it'd feel more like a couple days to me. Probably," I said with a sigh of relief.

"Well, if there are no other problems, then you can leave whenever you'd like," the Doctor told me, "and you don't need to worry about the bill. Princess Twilight already covered that the moment you were admitted."

"Really?" I asked, lowering my head. "Now I feel bad."

"Don't be, darling," said Rarity with a sorrowful look on her face. "You've been through so much. And Twilight felt terrible after what we all went through. It was only right."

"And I would've paid for it myself," Starlight added. "But I...don't exactly have the bits for it."

I smiled at both Rarity and Starlight, though I couldn't help but feel guilty. It wasn't necessarily their fault. But even then, I was thankful.

Stable gave a few nods of appreciation and then excused himself from the room, while Spike and the girls started for the door. Starlight went over to help me out of bed.

"Can you walk?" she asked me, but I only let out a little chuckle.

"I was doing it earlier."

"Right." The mare blushed, but still insisted on helping me a bit. I didn't protest, either.

"Actually," Celestia spoke up, "if it isn't any trouble at all, I'd like to speak to you privately before you go," she said, eyeing me with curiosity.

I shook my head and told her, "It's no problem at all."

The group all went outside the room, and Celestia gently closed the door behind them, leaving me all along with her.

"So," I asked, "what did you want to talk to me about?"

"I'd like to know more about your 'magic'," Celestia informed me. "In all my years, I've never seen a pony that wasn't a unicorn or an alicorn be able to conduct magic spells without the use of a horn. How were you able to conjure them so flawlessly?"

I told them about my magic. I mean, I had to, otherwise they would be asking how I managed to get home without it, but I knew it would lead to some wanted discussion.

I began saying, "Well, it's not just me that can do it. If they put their minds to it and really focused, anypony and even anybody could be able to conjure up some spells. Granted, it takes an extremely long time to do it, but...well, it can be done."

"And how long, exactly?" Celestia asked, curious but also hinting towards concern.

I couldn't blame her for gaining concern; should anypony who wasn't already capable of magic, and wanted to destroy the world, manage to learn how to do so, they could...

"Two months," I quickly answered, "maybe three. I forget. The books to learn it all can be found here on this world. But I won't say anything in case somepony could be hearing in. I don't want them knowing that."

Celestia smiled. "Clever. But if it's not too much trouble...do you mind if I...take a peak inside your head? Perhaps learn more about this magic? I don't plan on using it irresponsibly...but in the future, it could help us all when the time is right."

I froze, but I tried to keep it subtle. "Are you sure?"

But she laughed it off and joked, "Don't worry, I won't tell anypony what I end up seeing." I knew what she meant by that.

"That's not exactly what I meant," I told her. "I just don't want you to...take it so wrong. I don't know how to explain that any better than I did."

Celestia's expression changed, but not by very much, as if she expected me to say that.

"If you don't want me to see, you can tell me," Celestia said. "I won't be angry with you."

But that was the problem. I wanted them to know, and at the same time, I didn't. I wanted Celestia to know more because she was the oldest living creature in this hospital right now, other than Discord - or maybe he was older. Either way...she needed to know. But was this really the way to do so?

"Okay," I told her, sitting down on my haunches and giving a sigh. "But...please don't tell anyone. What you see here, at least not Starlight. Okay?"

She didn't question it any further, simply repeating the last word I said. A second later, her horn started to glow, and its magic began to surround my body, specifically my head, ready to enter my mind and read whatever there was about my own magic.

The transaction lasted for only a few seconds, but by then, she saw what she wanted to see - and more. I didn't see it, but I could hear Celestia pull away and her magic suddenly vanish, an audible gasp emitting from her throat. I looked up at her and her expression, the laid-back, optimistic look she always had, was gone.

What was left was nothing but sorrow.

Celestia held a hoof up to her mouth to silence herself, and the tears were quick to form in her eyes.

"I..." She tried to speak, but nothing could come out for a few seconds. But when she did, it was nothing more than a repeat of what the others asked, only this time, Celestia knew the truth.

"...Are you okay?" Her motherly voice hit me. Had I only been there a shorter time, I would've broken down, and I wanted to.

But with the knowledge that I had and the emotions I endured in the dome, I was able to hold back my sadness and gave Celestia a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah," I said to her. "I'm okay. I promise. I'm...I'm sorry you had to learn that way. I should've-"

"No," she stopped me from finishing. "No, it's fine. I would have learned about it eventually. I just...I wasn't prepared for that, perhaps."

Celestia closed her mouth and looked out the nearby window, to the landscape beyond that held Ponyville and Canterlot in its view.

"You must have been so alone."

"I was. For a while. But then I created Clanks, and I didn't feel so lonely anymore. Still..."

I saw the regal princess close her eyes through the window's reflection, but then I saw them open again and she turned to me, a broken but true smile looking back.

"Your secret's safe with me," Celestia said, "I promise you. ... Do you ever plan to tell them?"

I nodded. "Yes...somehow. I hadn't exactly given myself the time to prepare, but...I do plan on it. One day. But not anytime soon."

"Of course." The mare walked up to me and was gentle enough to pull me into a hug.

But this wasn't like the hug from before. This was a deeper, stronger, more motherly hug. It was like she wanted to hold me close and never let me go, as if out of fear of losing me again. No one was going to lose me.

Not if I had to say anything about it, at least.

"Thank you," I said to her. I knew she was smiling.

"Now you can go," she told me as she pulled away, "I believe your friends are waiting for you."

"You're not coming with?"

She shook her head. "Luna can't handle Canterlot on her own."

I laughed to myself and let out a sigh. "I guess I'll see you again soon."

The two of us exchanged one more goodbye, and in a flash of magical light, Celestia vanished into thin air, teleporting back to Canterlot in an instant, and leaving me on my own. Well, until I went outside.

Opening the door of the room, I walked out and saw Spike and the girls sitting a short distance down the hall, chatting with each other to keep busy. When they saw me walking down to them, they smiled and exchanged their own greetings.

"So what were you and Celestia talking about?" Starlight asked. "It didn't have anything to do with me...did it?"

I shook my head and told her, "No. She just wanted to know a bit more about magic, that's all. I thought you guys were headed home?"

"Right," Rainbow stepped in, "like we were gonna leave you here all alone after all the stuff we've been through trying to find you." Her tone was sarcastic.

"I wasn't alone, I was with..." Then I remembered that Celestia left. "Oh. Right...um...thanks."

"Ready to head home now?" Starlight asked me. I nodded, content. I was no longer exhausted or weak like before, but I was definitely ready to get at least some sleep.

But then I stopped. "Wait, what about Twilight? Did she-"

"Find Cranks?" Spike mentioned. "You bet!"

"She found him? Yes!" I shouted, pumping my hooves into the air with glee, but calmed down for a brief moment. "And it's...Clanks, by the way. Heh."

"Oh." Spike looked with a confused stare before holding the parchment that Twilight wrote to him up to me. "But she said 'Cranks,' so I just assumed..."

I waved a hoof. "No worries. Even I had the embarrassing moment of saying 'Cranks' instead of 'Clanks'. And I built him, mind you."

Clearing my throat, I stepped in front of the group and said, "Shall we?" But that calmness was quickly overshadowed by the fact that they never met Clanks yet, and thus...

"I'm so excited for you to meet him...!"

Hopefully he got along with Twilight well.