I Waited

I was back in the Library.

Not actually, of course. For all I know, the Library was long gone - destroyed, most likely. No, this Library, despite looking just like the real one, was nothing more than a dream.

Tonight was the first time in a long time that I chose to sleep, not just because I had to. And to think that the first sleep since the very first day was a dream about the place I was trapped in all that time. I had no problem going back to the Library - it was the one way I could retain all the information I learned the proper way - but I simply wanted to just dream about something normal for a start.

"Maybe that can wait tomorrow?" I suggested to nopony in particular.

I started walking down the endless hallway, looking through all the books that I read, archived, and memorized over the time that I was there. I could feel the fabric of the covers, the texture of the pages against my hooves. It felt just as it did when it was real.

Would they be mad? That I'm dreaming of this place again and wanting to reread its books again?

Maybe not.

Maybe so.

I had arguments in my head a long time back. Eventually, I learned to control them, but it didn't stop one from happening every now and again. But like I said, I could control them and stop them before they ever became arguments.

Pulling out one of the books from the shelves, I read the cover aloud. The Adventures Of Huckle And Finn.

I laughed to myself. One of the first novels I chose to read here. There. It's all confusing.

Flipping the book open, even the pages were accurate, not a single word or letter out of place.

"Finn woke up with a smile, a new day lurching over the horizon-"

Suddenly, that was when I heard hoofsteps approaching. I looked up, ahead of me, not seeing the source, but simply hearing it with a flick of my ear. I turned my head to where the sound originated from. Nopony could've been here. Unless...

"Princess Luna?"

Indeed, it was the princess of the night herself. The one who dwelt across the dreams of her sleeping subjects, learning of them through the adventures they have in the night, and ensuring that those adventures are left with good intentions.

And now I sound like Twilight.

"So, this is your Library?" Luna stared down the halls and up at the ceiling, looking out into the endless expanse of the cosmos.

"Well, it's not entirely accurate," I explained. "The stars are all wrong. But other than that...yes, this is my Library."

"It's quite vast. You say that it holds the words to all of the known realm of existence, is that correct?"

"I'm assuming Celestia told you about it?"

But she shook her head. "Twilight Sparkle, actually, in her own dream. But Celestia told me of what she saw from you."

"She did?" I asked her, though it sounded more like an answer.

"You've been gone longer than six months. Much longer. And you're afraid of Starlight Glimmer finding out the truth, simply out of fear of how she might respond."

She was right, but I still shook my head. "It's not just her, Luna. It's Twilight, AJ, Rarity - everyone in Ponyville, even. Could you imagine how everypony would react if they found out?"

"Hmm...no doubt, there would be some...trauma," she pondered, ignoring my brief look of slight disbelief, "but I believe that Twilight Sparkle would be understanding. She would come to terms relatively quickly."

"And you're sure of that?" She nodded. "And what about Starlight? I mean, she thinks she was the sole cause of me ending up here. If she found out how long I was really gone for...I feel like it would break her, cause her to do something...I don't know...I really don't know what she'd do. That's why I'm afraid of her finding out."

"And so you created the lie that you were gone for six months primarily to console her, is that correct?"

"That's the only reason. I mean, it still hurt her when I told her that, but it's better than telling her...well, you know."

"I see."

Luna walked in a circle around me, observing the books encased in their respective shelves, and peering out into space again as she thought of what to say, or what to do.

"Do you plan on telling her one day?" she asked me.

"No. I mean, yes. I mean...I don't know. I don't want to lie to her - I hate lying to anyone. But if I tell her the truth...she won't hate me, but she'll be hating herself until her dying breath."

I sighed, setting the book back in its spot and, and sat down on my haunches, looking up at Luna as if to say, "What do I do?" and she could tell just from the look alone that it was a cry for help.

But there was no proper advice that she could give me, none that could stop what I feared, it seemed. However, she then rested a hoof on my shoulder and looked at me intently.

"My little pony...the day will come when she will know the truth. And when that day comes, there will be nothing you can do to prevent it. Sooner or later, she will understand."

"And I'm supposed to let it happen?"

"'tis the way of life, unfortunately," she apologized, "but I know Starlight Glimmer and the heart that she holds. When she learns the truth, it will definitely hurt her, or crush her, as you said. She will spend her days wondering what she could have done differently. But in the end, I know for certain that Starlight will be content, knowing that you still remain at her side."

"You think so?"

"I am confident. Starlight is strong, and she has proven it. It will all come together to make sense, but only in due time."

"Due time...right." I let out a nervous sigh, but I gave Luna a kind smile. "Thank you, Luna."

The princess smiled back at me and gave me a weak half-hug. "The night will be ending soon. Are you sure you wish to stay here and read for its remainder?"

"A little," I answered somewhat sheepishly. "Maybe it's because I kinda miss it. For the books, I mean. Not the...loneliness."

Luna found herself humored, letting out a giggle. Was it strange to see Luna laugh? I hardly ever saw her laugh.

"I understand," she said. "Take care of yourself, my little pony. I'm sure my sister will be seeing you again very soon."

It was a moment of silence for just a second, but I had to ask her something. "Speaking of Celestia...how has she been? I know it hasn't been very long since I last saw her, but..."

"She's been just fine. Quiet, but fine. It is hard for her to comprehend how a single pony endured such a long time alone and seemingly stayed so sane through it."

I laughed, but it was heavily forced, even Luna could tell, though she didn't say anything of it.

"It's a long story."

Luna nodded. "Sleep well, then. I too will be seeing you soon enough."

"It won't be every night, will it?"

"Perhaps."

I rolled my eyes playfully and waved her goodbye. In a flash of light, Luna vanished, either returning to the waking world or visiting the dreams of other ponies. Then again, she did say that the night was almost over. Odd, considering I haven't exactly been here very long.

But that's how dreams work, I supp-

My eyes flung open as a rooster outside screamed its lungs out to anticipate the new day. With a yawn and a groan, I tried to do the same. Looking over to the clock on my nightstand, I saw that it was only seven o'clock in the morning.

"Mnngh..." I moaned to myself. "How in the hay am I gonna get used to this again?"

There were just some things I didn't miss.