Sweetie Belle grunted and wriggled on her back as she struggled to get the last stocking up her leg. She had no idea why this ridiculous getup was referred to as a "school filly outfit". She WAS a school filly, and this didn't match any dress code she was familiar with. Though come to think of it, she wasn't familiar with any dress code. School fillies just wore what everypony usually wore, which was nothing. But that was what the label on the package in Rarity's closet had said, and apparently these socks were a vital component. Thankfully, she had picked up enough sewing skill from her sister to hem and alter them appropriately to fit herself, along with the other outfits in her collection.

Finally in uniform, she peeked around the hallway corner to see anon exiting the kitchen, reading the newspaper while carrying a piece of toast in his mouth. Now was as good a time as any to strike.

"Oh, teacher!"

Anon, mouth still full of toast, looked up, looked around and behind himself, then pointed a thumb at his chest with a quizzical look on his face. Sweetie Belle nodded in response.

"Is there anything I could do to get some...extra credit?"

Anon rapidly chewed and swallowed down the rest of his toast before responding.

"Well, I do occasionally pick up a few substitute teaching gigs locally, but I've never had your class before, so I'm surprised you knew. Anyway, I'm not sure I can really do anything about getting you extra credit. I'd have to contact Cheerilee and set something up to make an addendum to the summer school curriculum, which I didn't think you were actually enrolled in. And from what I've seen of the grading system in Ponyville, it seems to be heavily pass/fail so I don't think extra credit is really even a thing."

Sweetie Belle strained at the effort of resisting rolling her eyes back into her head as he continued.

"But if there's any topics you want to brush up on with a little tutoring, I'm down to help."

She saw a chance and jumped on it "Yes! That would be great!"

"Okay. I can do some writing and literature stuff in a pinch, but my specialty leans more towards math and physical science. I've got some cool demos I can set up, and I don't think Ponyville has much in the way of museums, but there might be something within a short train ride. I just need to check if—"

"Actually, what I need is more...biological." She attempted to waggle her eyebrows to no effect.

"Hmm...not as much my wheelhouse as physics or chemistry, but I can give it a shot. So, what? Taxonomy? Photosynthesis? Natural selection? The mitochondria being the powerhouse of the cell?"

"I'm thinking more the birds and bees."

"Ooh! Bees are super interesting! They can see ultraviolet, communicate through a combination of dance and pheromones, and they have 3 sexes and can change one of them into another one just by change of diet! They can even—"

Sweetie pressed a hoof to his mouth before the avalanche of bee facts derailed things even further.

"Actually, forget about bees. What I actually need help with is anatomy."

"Anatomy?"

"Yeah. Pony anatomy. And human I guess. Similarities, differences...compatibilities."

"Hmm...well I'm actually pretty in the dark there. I know a little bit about equines back home, but I'm not sure how much carries over. I know the joints are crazy different, and I have no clue about stuff like the digestive tract. Like, I know you guys definitely eat plenty of baked goods with eggs and stuff, so you're not 100% strictly plant eaters, but then again even the horses back home would opportunistically snack on a baby chick if it wandered in front of their face to no ill effects so the herbivore to omnivore boundary was always pretty porous. But they were also physically incapable of throwing up which doesn't apply to ponies here so something is definitely built different."

Sweetie Belle put aside the disturbing mental image of eating a baby chick whole to interrupt once again.

"No. Not like that. I–I mean reproductive anatomy! You know! Mares and stallions getting together? Making baby ponies? That whole process?"

"Ohhhh. Yeah, again, I'm not super sure what carries over. Other than the very broad basics, I'm working on educated guesswork here and realizing that I haven't actually sat down and cracked open a relevant biology text. I'm no doctor, but I've got the informed layman's gist of how all the plumbing and everything works for humans. But when it comes to ponies, you might actually know as much or more than I do."

"Really?" Sweetie grinned mischievously. "Well, if only there were a way for us to learn more. Together. Form our own little study group to get the basics down. Do some compare and contrast. Maybe employ some visual aids or even physical models? Get a nice, firm, solid grip on the fundamentals and then repeat and keep pounding it in until it's second nature. For science, of course."

Sweeties flashed a smile that Anon returned in kind.

"I get what you're saying. And I think I have just the thing to make sure our intellectual curiosity is deeply and exhaustively satisfied. But this living room won't do. I've got a more appropriate location in mind. One stocked with the appropriate...educational tools and resources."

Sweetie felt a spreading dampness in her hindquarters. She bit her lip and responded.

"Well, we better get going then."

Anon simply nodded, stood up and scooped her up under his arm. Then he ran straight out the front door.

***

"And here are several slides showing the different stages of pony gestation."

Sweetie Belle continued screaming internally as she had done for the past half-hour, ever since Anon had kicked open the door to the Golden Oaks library and demanded Twilight give them both an in depth lecture on pony reproduction. A demand Twilight had been positively giddy to fulfill, quickly fetching several books, a whiteboard, and a slide projector.

The 30 minutes that followed up to this point had been the most dry, clinical, and by far least sexy discussion of genitalia and intercourse she had ever endured. Made worse by Anon being such an enthusiastic student, brimming with what appeared to be genuine academic interest. She saw him raise his hand into the air once again.

"Yes, Anon?" Twilight pointed a hoof at him.

"Do ponies actually go through estrus?"

"Excellent question! Contrary to some popular myths that circulate, they do not. Ancient pony ancestors did indeed have estrus cycles, but that gradually changed over time to the point that modern ponies have stable year round libidos and can conceive at any time of year, with a menstrual cycle remarkably similar to that of humans, though slightly shorter."

Anon quickly scribbled down some notes in his notepad. "Fascinating!"

As bad as eager student Anon was, it was still way better than when he had been sharing the whiteboard with Twilight as they both ran through comparative anatomy of humans and ponies. Anon's surprisingly detailed medically accurate sketches of human genitalia alongside Twilight's own renditions. Both explaining about the mechanics of erections, the function of prostate fluid, and how vaginal secretions are produced. Stopping only for one of them to scribble in their notebook when the other brought up something they found interesting like a couple of huge nerds. Not a trace of embarrassment on either of them the entire time. Anon had looked her dead in the eye without flinching as he gave a detailed description of how the process of human ejaculation worked, along with typical volumes emitted before passing it off to Twilight to do the same. Sweetie had briefly blacked out for a minute after that, and when she came back to her senses they had somehow gotten onto a tangent.

"Oh my gosh! I love bees!" Twilight shouted excitedly. "Did you know the males are actually haploid?"

***

After 2 more excruciating hours, the majority of which Sweetie had spent in a dissociative state, it seemed things were finally wrapping up. Mercifully, the actual health lesson had essentially concluded a half-hour ago as Twilight and Anon had effectively run through all their prepared material and had moved on to increasingly unrelated tangents into other topics. Twilight was currently giving him a tour of her basement lab and explaining what every piece of equipment did. Sweetie Belle took this time to reflect on the magnitude of her most recent failure.

What if...what if Anon just wasn't into ponies at all? Could that be it? The species gap? Getting hung up on that was considered a bit...backwards here in Equestria, but Anon had mentioned humans were the only sapient species back home so maybe that colored his view of things a bit. He might just be incapable of even perceiving ponies as possible sexual partners. Then again, for all she knew he might not be into ANYONE. He could be one of those, what were they called? Asexuals? It wasn't outside the realm of possibility. He did consume a prodigious amount of garlic bread. Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Anon's voice.

"Well, as fun as this has all been, we need to head out if I'm to get dinner started in time. Thank you once again Miss Sparkle, for a delightfully educational time. I'm positively kicking myself for not availing myself of your services sooner."

"Please, just call me Twilight, and you're quite welcome. For being the only library in Ponyville, so few ponies actually bother to drop by.

"Inconceivable! Though now it feels like I've stumbled onto some kind of rare secret treasure."

"That's sweet of you to say. And thank you for putting up with my little tour, by the way. It can all be a little too much for some, so I appreciate you being patient with me."

"Not at all! I was riveted the entire time you led me around." He flashed her a bright smile. "The optics were phenomenal. At least from where I stood. You should be proud."

Twilight gave a half-giggle in response "Yes, I suppose things looked pretty good from my angle as well."

Wait. Sweetie thought to herself. Are they...? Are they flirting? Is that what that is?

"Anyway, I'd invite you to stay for dinner, but Spike usually does the cooking and he's off in Canterlot at the moment. And I like you too much to subject you to my cooking." She gave a light hearted laugh that Anon quickly picked up.

"Well, I happen to be pretty decent when it comes to cooking, so how about the next time I swing by and you're without your usual chef, I commandeer your kitchen and teach you a couple of my favorite recipes, and you can teach me some more astronomy, or history, or anything else."

Okay, they are definitely flirting! Right?!

"Sounds great!" Twilight beamed. "The Tuesday after next, Spike is going to be off on a trip to the Dragon Lands. That would be perfect. Maybe as a bonus, I'll even give you the extended tour to some of the other rooms." Twilight gave a restrained giggle. "But only if your recipes really impress."

"Then I'll be sure to bring my A game. Well, it's been fun. But we really do have to hit the road now. Let's go, Sweetie."

Sweetie Belle snapped out of her incredulous open mouthed stare at the prospect of freedom. Anon's hand was on the door when they were suddenly stopped.

"Wait!" Twilight called out. "I just remembered there was a book I was going to recommend you! Just wait a minute. I'll be right back!"

She raced up the stairs, leaving the two of them to awkwardly stand around for what was closer to two minutes before a rapid series of heavy hoof falls announced her descent back down. In front of her floated a book, some kind of guide to pony history from what little Sweetie could make out, with the corner of some kind of black bookmark sticking out of it. Twilight levitated the book over to Anon's hands.

"Uh, thanks?"

Twilight opened the book to the section in the middle where the bookmark sat.

"I think you might find this part interesting. Let me know what you think of it."

Anon looked down and a huge grin began to spread over his face. "I think you're right on the money, Twilight. I believe I'm going to enjoy this immensely".

"Happy to hear it."

With a final set of goodbyes they finally departed the Golden Oaks library and made their way back to Anon's house, much to Sweetie Belle's palpable relief.

So was that actually the both of them flirting, or was that just Anon being hyper-dense again? Honestly, I can't put it past him at this point. The whole incapable of seeing ponies as sexual theory might still be on the table. Whatever. I can't wait to finally get back and take off this dumb outfit I've been stuck in all day.

As they entered Anon's house, he quickly shoved the book onto a high shelf before practically sprinting to the bathroom, which he had apparently been neglecting to visit all day. Overcome by a sudden bout of curiosity, Sweetie Belle ignited her horn and with a bit of effort, shakily levitated the book down to the floor.

Alright, let's see what has Anon so interested. Probably ancient pony bee keeping practices or something dumb like that.

She quickly flipped it open to the bookmarked section.

Whereupon she discovered that the small dark piece of cardstock was in fact, NOT a bookmark, but a hastily taken instant photograph.

A photograph of Twilight stretched out across her bed.

Wearing some very bold purple and black striped socks

"OH, COME ON!"

Author's Note

I originally meant to write and post this chapter back right before or right after Babscon, but life got in the way.