Prequel to Divergence, Product of Chaos
/x/x/x/
“Hey Fluttershy, the girls and I are getting together at the Hayburger. You wanna come with?”
“That sounds wonderful, Rainbow!”
“Cool, let’s go.”
“Wait, you mean now!?”
It’s too late, Rainbow is already out the door. I just gaped after her; I thought she meant that it was happening some other day this week, or at the very latest, in the evening. I’m not ready to go out in public right now! I’m not nearly ready enough. I haven’t eaten today yet, but I mean that isn’t really a problem since we’re presumably going to be eating there. And all the animals are fed. But I haven’t bathed yet, or brushed my mane, or preened, or cleaned my hooves, or anything! I’m a mess right now... not that that’s much of a change from normal...
No, I shouldn’t think about that. I’m not going to ruin Rainbow’s time. She seems really happy, much more than usual. Coincidentally since Hearts and Hooves day last month. Ugh... my stomach still turns thinking about that. Easy Fluttershy, breathe. You’re fine, everything will be okay, we’re going to go have a nice meal, and then we’re going to spend time with our friends, and then we’ll have a nice relaxing decompression, okay? Okay.
“Angel bunny,” I call. “I’m going to be leaving. Would you like to come as well?”
There’s no response. Usually if he wants to go I hear the little thumping of his feet immediately. I guess he isn’t coming... that’s really a shame, it would have been nice to have him with me so I don’t feel as alone. The girls don’t feel as close as they used to be... ugh, here I go again with the negativity. No wonder.
I shake my head a little. I should get going if I want to arrive on time. Not that I even know what time it’s supposed to be starting, Rainbow was barely in the door five minutes before telling me we were leaving. Breathe, it’ll be fine. Okay? We’re going.
I gently shut the cottage door behind me before turning to see Rainbow flapping in the air. She looks really impatient, a lot more so than usual. She’s always a little short with me, but that’s because I do take a long time to do things sometimes. But it’s a lot bigger and stronger right now. I wonder why that is... it couldn’t be because of me, right?
“Finally!” She cries. “Thought you got lost on the way to the front door. You okay to fly?”
I nod and we take off. I’ve been getting much better. I’m nowhere near as strong or fast or deft as Rainbow in the air but I can hold my own. Even Rarity was better with her wings when she had them than I am. And what pretty wings they were. Rarity would look lovely as a pegasus, but she looks quite beautiful as a unicorn as well. She’s just a very attractive mare; I wish I had a fraction of her grace and poise...
Oh, I have to make sure my mind doesn’t wander today. I can’t make a habit of that. Rarity is my friend and I’m delighted to have her in my life. I can’t wait for our spa appointment later on in the week! I always look forward to whatever time I get to spend with her. I know it’s selfish but in a way I’m really glad that I’m really the only pony aside from Spike that she spends a lot of one on one time with.
Pinkie Pie doesn’t count because that’s with everypony, and though she’s a dear friend to me, she can definitely be a lot to deal with. Applejack hasn’t been close to me since... since before Rainbow moved here, and Twilight is always so hard to talk to because she’s so much more intelligent than I am. It’s good that she talks so much because I hate how my tongue trips over myself when I talk to her.
I glance over at Rainbow, thinking about how often she used to talk to me rather than now. She always makes time for me but I can tell she has to force it. She much prefers the company of Applejack and Twilight and Pinkie. Surprisingly enough she’s been spending a lot of time with Rarity recently as well. That’s okay, of course, I just hope she doesn’t forget about me... Her eyes are closed and she’s clearly enjoying the sunshine. She’s smiling. She’s always so pretty when she smiles. She’ll argue with me and say she isn’t but I know I’m right.
I find myself staring, but snap my vision away and keep an eye ahead of me.
The restaurant grows nearer. From here I think I can see Twilight and Rarity. They look excited about something. They look up at us and begin waving, so I wave back. Rainbow opens her eyes and starts to descend with me. I envy her for her ability to read the air so well that she can tell how far away buildings are without even needing to see. She’s so talented...
“Darlings, how are you?” Rarity greets as we hit the ground. “We were almost concerned that you weren’t going to show.”
“Yes, typically you only take seventeen minutes to leave town, talk to Fluttershy, and return with her in tow.” Twilight briefly turns to me. “Hello, by the way.” And with that she turns back to Rainbow. I would have said hi back but I kind of lost the ability to speak. Her mane looks quite luxurious today.
“Yeah, Shy was being a bit of a slowpoke today,” Rainbow replied, gently nudging me. I blushed when her wing touched mine, but quicker than it happened the contact stopped. “She took a few minutes to get ready. AJ and Pinkie here yet?”
“Yes, they’re inside holding a table and ordering drinks for us,” Rarity answered. “We told them we would wait for you outside, so shall we?”
Rainbow nodded before falling into step beside her. That’s strange... recently she’s been doing that with Rarity a lot. She’s been really close to her, and that’s fine because I’m glad that my two closest friends are getting along so well, but sometimes I just wish that it was me that they were paying attention to instead. I know that’s selfish, but in the past few weeks it’s seemed like they’ve been paying more attention to each other than to me.
The bell over the door rings. It looks busy today. There’s over a dozen separate groups of people, all talking at the same time. Their voices are echoing off the walls, overlapping and interlocking and making it impossible to follow any one conversation. It’s so loud, and it’s so chaotic. It smells nice but it smells strong, and the lights are bright, and it’s too warm in here. I’m not ready for this I can’t do this this isn’t good why is it so loud why is it so much it’s too noisy in here and I can’t breathe I can’t breathe I can’t-
“Fluttershy, are you okay?” Twilight asks, wrapping a hoof around my neck and leaning in to speak softly in my ear. I’m grateful because it distracted me from what almost could have been an embarrassing moment for me and my friends is over, but now I’m suddenly feeling really uncomfortable. I look into her eyes: she has no idea what she does to me, does she...?
“Yeah,” I answer. I decide to be honest with her. “I’m just feeling a little bit overstimulated right now. Rainbow didn’t give me much warning before inviting me along today and I didn’t know it would be so soon, and I just didn’t have enough time to prepare myself.”
She nods. “I can understand that. Just let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you. Do you need a hug? I know that can sometimes help with grounding.”
“That...” Well, on one hoof that could help. I’ve been feeling a lot more down than usual and it may be because I’m a bit lacking in affection recently. But on the other hoof, this could maybe end up making it worse because then I’ll be fighting off guilt too. But why should I be, it’s not like I’m being weird about it out loud or anything, right? “That would be appreciated.”
Twilight turned her body to lock her head behind mine, and pulled me closer with her hoof. I do the same in kind, grateful for the contact. Her fur is so warm, and her mane smells lovely. I’ll have to find a tactful way to tell her that I like it and ask what she uses without her thinking that I sniffed her. Which I didn’t, by the way. She’s just very fragrant.
I can feel her breathing, her pulse in her chest. It’s soft but firm, and steady. I’m sure mine is racing, especially now. She adjusts her head, and- briefly nuzzles my neck! Okay, I need to stop this, my wings are tensing up, now is not the time for that!
I loosen my hoof and thanks be to Celestia she follows suit and pulls away. She seems completely unfazed; I’m glad she doesn’t fully know pegasus biology. Luckily most of the ponies around us are earth and unicorns and couldn’t tell what happened. However, out of the corner of my eye I can see Raindrops looking at me questionably. I turn slightly so my mane obscures her judgmental face, and look up at Twilight instead. She’s smiling... so caring, so compassionate...
I don’t deserve her.
“Are you feeling a little better?” She asks, cutely tilting her head to the side. I am feeling less like I’m about to have another panic attack, but my heart is hammering away for a different reason entirely now. Luckily it’s for a reason that I’m okay with, as long as I’m the only one who knows about it.
“Yes, thank you.”
She nods. “That’s good; and we have a table in the far corner, away from most everypony else. It should be quieter over there. And if it’s too much then I can cast a noise dampening spell that makes it almost silent for us if you need me to, just ask.”
A smile finds itself on me despite my objections. “I appreciate that but I don’t think that it will be necessary. It was just a sudden change in dynamics but I’ve settled into the environment now.”
“Okay, I’m glad you’re feeling a bit better.” She sets her hoof on my wing, and gently strokes it. “I hate seeing you dealing with overstim. I had the same thing happen to me when I was young, until I used magic to help me with it. Luckily I had that, but I know you don’t. Just let me know if you ever need anything.”
My chest feels like it’s in a vice. I don’t deserve how good of a friend she is to me.
“Thank you... Twilight.”
Her name feels so nice on my tongue. She smiles at me and turns away, walking to the table. I keep my eyes firmly planted on the floor between us as I follow behind. A few moments later I take my seat at the table. To my left are Rarity and Rainbow, to my right Pinkie and Applejack. Twilight sits across from me, and flashes another supportive smile. I manage to supply one back even though I don’t feel it.
I turn to face Rarity, but she’s enraptured in a conversation with Rainbow Dash. They’re sitting very close together. They don’t typically sit that close to me. On my other side, Pinkie is perusing the menu with the most intense look of concentration I think that I’ve ever seen her have, and Applejack is speaking to Twilight. I can’t hear because their tones are very hushed. I don’t bother reading the menu because I know what I want.
Instead I glance in the general direction but not directly at the ponies around the restaurant. I see faces that I recognize, faces I don’t, and faces I can’t quite place but am sure that I’ve seen before. None of them are looking directly at me, which is good. I prefer it when the ponies I’m not directly at an event without prior knowledge of my attendance leave me alone. But I don’t like being ignored. I contemplate saying something, but I close my mouth after a moment. Everypony else is doing something more important than my desire for conversation.
My mind wanders.
I know that I like Twilight. A lot. I knew that I cared for her when the cockatrice caught her, and I knew that she cared for me when she helped me and Rarity after my brief stint as a supermodel. But I didn’t realize that I had actual feelings for her until the Philomena incident, when she was willing to take the blame for me, despite all the things she’d have lost if Celestia actually was upset. I haven’t told her about it, of course... I don’t even know if she likes mares. I’ve had enough experience with that...
I look over to Rarity, who has her hoof on Rainbow’s foreleg, clearly riveted to the story being told. A couple years ago I confessed feelings to her, but they were rejected because she was only looking for a stallion to share her life with. Which is of course entirely her prerogative! I was just happy to know that she was willing to remain friends with me despite my feelings so long as I didn’t act upon them, which I haven’t.
Before that even, all the way in flight school, I had confessed what at the time I had thought were feelings for Rainbow as well. She indicated that she had no interest in romance but was ‘totally chill with hanging out’. And that’s fine as well. Just because it’s something that I’d like to experience just once in my life doesn’t mean that it’s something that she also has to be open to.
It would help if I was able to make friends more easily, or if we lived in a bigger city, but neither of those would help. No matter how many people I knew, I know that it would be futile to put any sort of hope into something like romance... I should be happy with the social interactions that I have. I should love the friends I’ve met as friends. I should be satisfied. So why-
“Hiya, can I take any of your orders?”
I jump from my seat as the waitress suddenly steps up from behind me, notepad in hand and a pencil in her mouth. She has a pale pink coat and a dual toned light blue mane, cut short and with faintly heart shaped bangs. She has really pretty ice blue eyes and an infectious grin. If she’s the new waitress here I just might eat here more often.
We go around in a circle, making out orders and turning in our menus. I ask for the mustang cristo, and she compliments me on my choice. I blush a little, and she winks at me, which only served to deepen it. She tells us that our food will be right out, and that she’ll be around momentarily with more refills. I take my untouched glass and sip about half of it through the straw in one go, as I’m feeling incredibly thirsty.
/x/x/x/
After our meals are delivered and finished, and conversations are had that thankfully included me, our checks are given to us.
“Hey, guys,” Rainbow says, getting everybody at the table’s attention. “I’m gonna be paying for all of us today.”
What?
The others at the table vocalize this, except for Rarity. She just sits sipping her water and looking at Rainbow. She doesn’t seem fazed by this at all, as if she expected that to happen.
“Not that we don’t appreciate the gesture, Rainbow,” Twilight says. “But why?”
“Yeah, y’all don’t typically do stuff like this unless somethin’ big’s goin’ on.”
“You’re right, AJ, something big is going on.” Rainbow grins at Rarity, who nods, before she turns to the rest of us. “You guys can’t say anything about it but I just got some intel from my dad, who you guys know works in the Cloudsdale weather system, that they’re gonna be having Ponyville’s reservoir fuel the rainclouds factory.”
“That’s super funtifferastic!” Pinkie cries, before being shushed by Applejack. An O of recognition forms as she nods and zips her lips closed.
“That’s wonderful news!” Twilight says at a normal speech volume. “But what does that have to do with you?”
Rainbow closes her eyes and nods. “Well, ordinarily nothing...” She opens her eyes and touches her hoof to Rarity’s. I bite my lip at that, because she always tells me that she thinks that platonic physical affection is sappy, so I’m more than a little bit envious of Rarity. “But I also just got some intel from my mom, who as you girls know is a field medic in the military, that a certain Captain of the Wonderbolts is gonna be coming to oversee a certain somepony who’s gonna be specially selected to lead the hurricane.”
She doesn’t continue further but I think we all have the same feeling that we know who was chosen. Luckily it’s Applejack who decides to go ahead and ask, “And I take it that the pony they’re gonna choose for the job is you?”
She nods excitedly in response. “Yeah, Spitfire’s gonna see me exercise my leadership skills and flight capabilities and stuff, and since this is such a big honor for us as a town and I’m gonna be heading it up, that’s a ton of recognition and advancement opportunity for me! And I’m really excited about that potential for awesome stuff to happen, so I wanted to share that over a meal with my best friends. I wanna thank you guys for always being there for me and stuff, even when I’m kind of being a jerk. I wouldn’t have made it this far without you guys...”
She looks directly at Rarity as she says this, which is more painful than it probably should be. Rarity has done a lot more for Rainbow for her personal growth than I have, so it makes sense, but still. Plus Rarity fixed her cloak and her Commander Hurricane costume, made her and Tank matching slippers, and made a lot of custom alterations to her gala dress... I haven’t done anything that nice for her recently.
“Aww...” Pinkie mutters, with little stars in her eyes.
“Do you know when it’s going to be?” Twilight asks.
“Some time after the dragon migration,” Rainbow answers. “And you and I gotta talk afterwards because I want you to help me out ‘cuz you’re smart and stuff.”
She nods. “I’d love to help out. And thanks.”
“Well thanks for the meal, Dash,” Applejack interjects, stepping off of her chair. “I’m proud of ya for workin’ hard enough to earn this opportunity. I’d stay longer an’ chat but I gotta get back to the farm, since we’re still recoverin’ from those connivers.”
“It’s cool,” Rainbow says, shrugging. “I’ll come by tomorrow and see what I can help out with.”
“Y’all know there ain’t any cider left, right?”
“I’m not just helping your for cider!”
“I know, sugarcube, I’m just teasin’ you. I’ll see y’all later.”
We all bid our goodbyes to Applejack as she leaves. I feel bad for her. I know I have a lot of responsibilities to my animals but it seems like she’s always on the farm taking care of more trees, crops, livestock, and finances than I’d ever be able to handle. I know she’s strong and capable, much more than I am, but still. She deserves to spend time with us more than I do.
“I also need to leave soon,” Twilight says. “I have to go home and make my schedule for the next month. Pinkie, are you still on for the Tuesday after next?”
“Yup-aroni and cheese with extra sprinkles!”
“Well if you’re gonna leave now for that,” Rainbow interjects. “Then I’ll go with you since I’m sure you wanna make sure there’s time to help out with hurricane prep.”
“You’re right!” Twilight exclaims. “I’d really appreciate that.”
“Cool, lemme just take care of the checks and then I’ll meet up with you at the library, okay?”
She nods. “I’ll see you then. Girls, it was nice to see you all again. Rarity, I’ll tell Spike I said hi. Pinkie, tell the twins that I said hi. And Fluttershy... I’m always here if you need me. I’ll see you all later!”
“Yeah, I’m heading now too. Later, Pinks. Fluttershy. See you tonight, Rares.”
What?
Twilight leaves but I don’t notice because Rainbow is leaning in to Rarity really closely and oh sweet Celestia they just kissed.
“I’ll be waiting for you, darling,” she breathes.
Rainbow winks at her before gathering the receipts and heading to the front desk to pay, or at least I’m assuming that’s where she’s going because I’m too busy trying to process the fact that Rainbow and Rarity seem to be an item now. But that doesn’t make sense! Rarity likes stallions and Rainbow likes fictional characters! Why are they together!? Why did they kiss, why are they seeing each other tonight, why are they dating now, why... why didn’t they tell me...
“Sooooo...” Pinkie suggests, leaning in to Rarity, who begins blushing and looking in every direction but her friend. “How long have you and Dashie been dating?”
She laughs nervously. “Well, truth be told since Hearth’s Warming... but it wasn’t really public knowledge as those encounters were a bit... personal and private. And she wouldn’t have called it dating, it was more like... midnight rendezvous. But as time went on I found myself developing more intimate feelings for her. She always said she wasn’t into romance, which I thought was fine, but eventually it wasn’t fine. On Hearts and Hooves day, I was home alone and eating ice cream as I do every year that I’m single and dateless, and I suppose she came to me seeking more of the same, and... I confessed my feelings to her. At first she was a little shocked, but then she asked me on a date that night, and ever since then we’ve been together every night.”
“AWW, RARE BEAR! THAT’S SO ADORABLE!!!”
So that’s why they haven’t been paying as much attention to me recently... because they have each other. I... I’m happy for them. I’m glad that they found each other. It’s good that they get to share something like that. I wish them nothing but the best. They’re going to be a really good couple, and take Equestria by storm. I wonder if they’ll get married. What a wedding that would be. Why... are they doing this to me...
“Oh, so you... like me?”
“Yes... I think you’re a really nice pony and if you would want to be my fillyfriend then that would make me happy, but I like being friends with you so if you don’t want to then I’ll still be happy, but I just wanted to tell you that you’re really brave and strong and you inspire me to make myself better. You’re an important person to me, Rainbow...”
“I... thanks. But... look, no offense, because you’re really nice and polite and stuff, and you’re a really good friend too, but... I don’t really want a fillyfriend. Or a coltfriend. I just want friends and workout buddies. You know?”
“I... I understand. But that’s okay! I don’t have to date you to enjoy your presence. We can still be friends, right?”
“Yeah, absolutely! You’re like the coolest pony here besides me! I don’t ever not wanna be friends with you, Fluttershy. I just... don’t wanna date anybody. Not right now and not really ever either.”
“Aww,” Pinkie says, nudging me. “Look, Rarity, Fluttershy’s so happy for you she’s got tears of joy on her face!”
“So I understand what’s happening here, you’re asking me to be your marefriend?”
“Yes, Rarity. I enjoy being around you. You’re so graceful and elegant and you know how to talk to essentially everypony. You’ve been a shoulder for me to cry on whenever I’ve needed it, and you’re one of kindest and most generous souls I’ve ever met. You give me the confidence I need to live my life, and... and you make me happy when I’m at my worst.”
“Oh, darling, I’m so glad to know that I’ve had such a positive effect on your life. You deserve the world on a silver platter, Fluttershy, and I do love you. But... you’re a mare. If I were to date anypony, he would have to be a stallion. My feelings for you are platonic, and nothing more, but it isn’t for any reason other than your gender.”
“I... I understand. I won’t let it interfere with our friendship... we can still be friends, right?”
“But of course! You’re my closest and best friend, and I’m not going to let something as silly as a crush get in the way of that. You’re such a respectful and compassionate mare, and I know that you would never act upon your attractions if you knew they wouldn’t be reciprocated. Just as long as you do know that they can’t be, and mind that barrier, I want you to be as much of a part of my life now as when I’m as old and creaky as the attic upstairs. You’re my friend, my sister, but... I have no desire for a marefriend. Now or ever.”
I muster a smile, and manage to hide my sobs as laughs.
“I’m so happy for you!” I choke out. “My two best friends together? It’s like a dream come true!” That or a nightmare.
“Oh, darling!” She cries, hugging me. “I’m so glad for your support. And to think I was worried about coming out to my friends as bisexual... silly me, of course. I love you all!”
“Group hug!” Pinkie exclaims, coming in behind us and wrapping her forelegs around our bodies.
I don’t feel their warmth. The ice in my heart is spreading, and the chill crawls up behind my throat. It’s choking me, and I find it hard to breathe. My tears fall to the floor, plopping audibly. I’m happy. I have to be.
I’m happy. Anything else would be selfish and wrong.
I’m happy. I want them to find love even if it’s not me.
I’m happy. I hope that they’re happy too.
I’m lying. They’re slipping away from me.
I feel... alone...
“Do you need a tissue, darling?” Rarity asks, looking into my eyes. “I didn’t know that this would emotionally affect you as much as it is.”
I shake my head to the side. “I’m fine, Rarity,” I lie. “I’m just so grateful that I can be here for you, for both of you, and I’m excited for all the stories you’re sure to tell me during our spa date.”
“I- oh...” she bites her lip. “That reminds me, darling, I’m afraid that I’ll have to postpone it this week, as Dash much against what character I thought she had is taking me to a Prench restaurant in Cloudsdale to officially meet her parents, as they have been pestering her about me for weeks. I confided to her that I felt it was a bit quick, but then she showed me the letters they sent her on the subject... all two hundred and thirty seven of them.”
“Oh... that’s fantastic!” I cry, tearing my heart in two as I do. “That sounds like such a nice time. We’ll just have to talk about it next week then!”
“Of course! Now, I’m afraid that I also must cut the meeting short, as I have a certain somepony to get ready for meeting. Pinkie Pie, I trust I’ll see you tomorrow at the market?”
“Yep-peroni pizza!”
“Lovely. Fluttershy, I suppose I’ll see you next week?”
I nod, wiping my eyes with my wings, keeping that plastic smile on. “Don’t spare any details when you do.” Please spare me as many details as possible.
“I’ll ensure I don’t!” She exclaims, giddy as a schoolfilly before she leaves.
Now it’s just me and Pinkie Pie alone at the table, and she grabs the dessert menu sitting at the center of the table. She sits for a minute, scanning through it more times than I know she normally does when she actually wants to order something. She rereads it until the bell rings and we both know that Rarity has left.
I shudder once. No, no Fluttershy you do not do this right now. You are not going to break down in front of Pinkie and all these other ponies. You’re going to be a big girl and wait to cry your eyes out until after you get home and take care of the animals and then go lock yourself in your room. You’re not going to bring down your friends just because of your own selfish desires.
“I like AJ.” Pinkie quietly states.
I turn to her, but she doesn’t meet my gaze.
“Bon Bon. Lucky. Shoeshine. Sassaflash. Davenport. Roseluck. And I’m sure Spike’s gonna be sad when he finds out Rarity’s with Dashie. So you’re not alone.” She looks up to me, with a serious expression. I’ve never seen this side of her before. “And if you ever want a non-judgy place to be sad, or a place to make you forget your sads, then you can just let me know... whatever you need that brings back the happy Fluttershy that I know and love, I’ll do it.”
“Pinkie...”
“Just so you know what resources you have... I can tell when a smile is fake. And I know that I’m not your favorite pony in Equestria because I can be really loud and obnoxious sometimes, but if you need help or support or anything, then just ask me, because... you’re one of my favorite ponies in Equestria. And I want you to be happy.”
I bite my lip. “I appreciate hearing that, Pinkie... but I think I just need some time alone right now.”
She nods. “And if that’s what you need, I can give that to you too.” She leans in to hug me. “I’ll see you later, Shy-Shy.” And with that she turns to leave. And I let her.
Now I truly am sitting alone. I look down at our dishes. I hardly touched my sandwich. I’m not hungry. Haven’t been in a while. Probably won’t be for another while.
“Hey there,” Cute Waitress says, coming up to the table. “Can I getcha a box or somethin’?”
I just nod, and she leaves a promise to bring one. A minute of wallowing and self loathing later, she brings it back and asks if I need anything else. I say no thank you, and she leaves. I reach into the change purse I always keep hidden in my tail extensions and pull out a dozen bits. I know that Rainbow doesn’t tip well. Not because she’s mean but because she’s bad at math. I leave them on the table and package up my food before leaving.
I go home. I set my sandwich in the refrigerator. I put out food for the nocturnal animals. I skip bathing and go straight to bed. I lay there for a couple of hours before going to sleep.
I wake up having dreamt a good, warm dream of Rarity and Rainbow holding me, to a cold, empty, and uninviting bed.
For the next few weeks I have the same dream every night. Waking up hurts worse and worse every time.
I sign on for a class on assertiveness, and I deeply wound Rarity and Pinkie. I let Rainbow down with the hurricane. I mostly ignore everybody for a long time until Applejack comes to let me know that a beaver built a dam in a place she needed water, so I take care of that because it’s what I do, and then we get called into the town square. I get put in charge of reforming the scion of chaos...
Eris.
/x/x/x/
Author's Note
Don't look into this because I'm not doing The Butterfly Effect until AFTER I finish my Fireflies continuity, my Equestria Girls continuity, and my regular continuity. But this is both an AU and a sequel to all of those fics. Yes, I know that doesn't make sense yet but it isn't supposed to yet because I haven't made the building blocks for it yet. This is just here to remind me of the main plot points that I have to pay attention to so that my entire chronology has no holes, but it's complete enough as a vignette and an exercise in first person present tense, as well as palate cleansing me for continuing the fics that require my attention the most because it's had the most attention paid to it via likes and comments.
