Author's Note
!!!!!WARING!!!!! This story includes ABDL themes, diaper wetting, and thoughts of suicide, if these bother you, STOP READING NOW!!!!!
Mom, im, so sorry......
Stargazer sighed as he entered his quarters via the door that directly connected them to the royal chambers of his mentor, Princess Luna. He closed and locked the door behind him, beginning to remove his uniform, which was in reality a custom set of Lunar Guard armor in a dark shade of blue instead of the normal purple, revealing his black coat. It took some convincing and a bouquet of night roses, but he had managed to get Luna to have it made for him, which he was thankful for, sense it helped him feel like he belonged in the castle instead of being a civilian outsider.
As he finished removing the armor and set it on its stand, Stargazer silently scolded himself for almost turning in his latest assignment late, he didn't want to tarnish his record of being on time with work. He turned to the mirror above his dresser and was going to reach for a brush to fix his frazzled blue mane, but stopped and just gazed at his horn as it began to glow with magic. His horn, that was his greatest flaw in his eyes, despite other aweing over the fact he was born an alicorn. "If only they knew what hellish things this damned horn puts me through" he whispered to himself, and returned to brushing his mane.
As Stargazer continued to brush his mane, the days work began to take its toll on him. He felt exhausted, which caused him to lose focus and channel to much magic through his horn, resulting in the hairbrush jerking hard to the side. "ARG, DAMN IT ALL!" Stargazer cried out in pain as the sudden tug from the brush ripped out a lock of hair from his mane. Stargazer quickly stopped casting magic, but that only sent the brush flying across the room, slamming hard enough into the window to crack it.
Stargazer turned and silently slapped himself internally for what he had done. This, this was why he hated being an alicorn. Being the first ever born Bat-Alicorn, Stargazer's magic worked differently from any normal unicorn or alicorn. Despite being just as powerful as the Royal Sister's magic, his was still useless in his eyes. The doctors said his was "unstable", and "possibly too much for his brain to control", and he figured they were correct. Even at 19 years of age he could still only cast simple everyday levitation safely, and even then, things like this often occurred.
Despite all that, Luna still believed with proper concentration and her personal training, Stargazer could grow to even rival her in power, and he was very grateful, but over the last few sessions his failures had him thinking she said that just to be nice, with him truly being doomed to be stuck with a useless spike on his forehead for his entire ageless life, at times he wondered if it would be better if he just.... ended it.
Stargazer quickly set that thought aside. "No, don't think that way Stargazer, you have a way to cope" he thought to himself as he turned to look at his bed. "Well, its time..." After checking that the doors were locked, Stargazer carefully pulled a large wooden chest with a sturdy steel lock on it out from under his bed. He then grabbed one of the pillows and felt around in its case with a hoof until he found a small metal object, a key.
Stargazer looked over his shoulder to check again that he was alone. He then figured that his room would be less likely to be visited if the lights were off, he didn't need them anyways, his sky blue bat-pony eyes could still see just as well in the dark. After turning off the lights and plunging the room into comforting darkness, Stargazer unlocked the chest and opened it, revealing four packs of extremely thick blue adult foal diapers covered in purple stars and changing supplies, along with a matching onesie and purple pacifier.
Stargazer let our a quiet "eeeee" of excitement. He didn't know how many laws he had broken erasing the economic records of him purchasing these, but it didn't matter, he needed this. His fangs showed as he smiled, setting out the blue changing mat and laying down on it. Stargazer sighed as he felt the soft puffy diaper on his flanks and let out a small chuckle when the foal powder tickled him. Taping the diaper on snugly, Stargazer began to put the onesie on. He let out a "mmm..." sound of comfort as zipped it up and put his legs in their covers, followed by three snaps as he closed the onesie around his diaper, finally finishing by putting the hood over his head.
Stargazer popped the pacifier in his mouth after clipping it to the onesie's zipper tab and gave it a few relaxing suckles. Happily trotting over to his night stand he opened the bottom drawer and retrieved his favorite cuddle buddy, a well loved bat plush with a blue patch sewn over a tear in its wing, Luna knew he had it to sleep with, but she didn't know Stargazer used it for this. Jumping up on his bed, Stargazer flopped down on his back, holding his plushie tightly, and rolled back and forth happily kicking his hind legs in the air.
After he wore himself out rolling around, Stargazer lay down on his chest, plushie under leathery wing, and began to suckle his pacifier again. Stargazer then turned his attention to the padding he was wearing, trying and failing to touch his hind legs together, the comfort of the soft, extremely thick diaper getting in the way, just the way he liked it. Without noticing at first, or even caring, Stargazer began to flood his diaper with a noticeable hissing noise, his bladder finally getting relief after a long day of training and studying non-stop for hours on end.
As he continued to wet himself the diaper became warm and damp, making a small squishing sound as it swelled against Stargazer's body, giving him feelings of comfort, relaxation, and even though he hated to admit it, pleasure. "Ooohhhhhhh yea, that felt great..." Stargazer said quietly as he finished peeing, pulling his plushie out from under his wing so he could look at it. "Someday Fangs, ima find a diapee you can wear, and then you'll feel the true joy I do" Stargazer said in a slightly foalish voice, pulling Fangs up to his nose, feeling the patch his mother had sewn onto his wing rub his cheek.
His mother. Stargazer avoided thinking about her as much as possible, but he couldn't get her out of his mind now. Happy memories of the feeling of her holding him in her hooves and rocking him came into Stargazer's mind, and then took a turn strait for the worst. It all flashed through his mind in only a second, but to Stargazer it felt like hours. He only caught a quick glance of his mother standing over his crib before everything went white and a loud ringing could be heard, which faded to the sound of an ambuance siren, followed by the beeping of a hospital heart monitor with an image of his mothers closed eyes and blackened face.
"Mom, im, so sorry......" Stargazer sniffled, and then promptly broke out in tears, pulling the blanket and sheets around himself like a nest as he began to cry.
