Cheaters Never Win

by MidnightPie

Rating: mature
Tags: Profanity, Slice of Life, Dark, Alternate Universe, Thunderlane, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rarity, Sex, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 2102

Cheaters never win. So why does Rarity feel like she's winning?

Cheaters never win. So why does Rarity feel like she's winning?

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An entry in the A Two-Faced Charade Contest!

Sex tag is only for implied sex things.

Published 2018-03-03 00:50:11 UTC
Last updated 2018-03-03 00:50:11 UTC

And Winners Never Cheat

Rarity hated sneaking around. It was nearly midnight. The moon’s glow spread across the lands, allowing for a little light so that Rarity could find her way. She dared not to light up her horn so she wouldn’t attract any unwanted attention to herself. She had to return to her boutique slowly and carefully.

Rarity was dating Thunderlane. This was a known fact around the town. She had fallen for the muscular stallion after he saved her life when she was gem hunting and had gotten into some trouble with some timberwolves. It was a few months after that incident that she fell for him and they began to date. The town loved them. They were the cutest couple. Even Spike approved. Rarity had loved Thunderlane with all her heart. They were meant to be together. It was only fated to be so, as Pinkie the enthusiastic fortune teller told her after 5 bits had been paid out.

Today, she told Thunderlane that she would be going to bed early. He sadly left, hoping for sweet cuddles and a little more, but Rarity insisted that he leave her be, for it had been a stressful day.

She lied.

It had been far from a stressful day. She had very few customers today which meant that she had time to herself to relax. She spent the day with Pinkie Pie, sipping milkshakes and conversing with her pink friend. She had a wonderful and relaxing spa treatment afterwards with Twilight, which had only gone wrong with the mud bath machine exploded. Then she had returned home when Thunderlane arrived asking for cuddles.

As Rarity quietly slipped back into her boutique, she thought about earlier. She had no plans to go to bed at all. None at all. In fact, she had gone out elsewhere. She had done things that she and most others did not consider to be good things.

She closed the door quickly and quietly before sitting down behind it. Rarity stared at her hooves, or at least, what she could see of them in the dark. She allowed herself to get lost in her thoughts.

Rarity’s mother always told her that cheaters never win. This was especially true during board games when Rarity would attempt to cheat and would always get caught. How she never learned her lesson, she never knew. But that sort of behavior never stemmed into her adulthood. She was an honest mare, with good intentions, always. She never cheated to get her way because cheaters never win.

But if cheaters never won then why did Rarity feel like she was winning?

Thunderlane sucked. He was a good little boyfriend at first, always doting and caring but six months into the relationship, Rarity knew she wanted out. She couldn’t just leave at this point however because she was in too deep.

And what could possibly be wrong with Thunderlane? Well, he was very poor in bed, to begin with. He often pleasured himself only and when it came her turn to get off, he left her stranded.

He also smelled like soup. It didn’t seem like such a bad quality at first but overtime, it became very apparent to Rarity that no matter how many times Thunderlane showed, he would always smell like soup. It grew annoying over the course of a few months to the point where Rarity could hardly stand being near him.

There was also the fact that he sometimes tried to control her. He yelled at her, attempting to control what she ate, where she went and what she wore. Sometimes he hit her. But that was only a tiny nitpick.

She was also one hundred percent sure that he had a necrophilia fetish. It wouldn’t have been bad in an imaginary sense but there was one particular incident where a townspony told her he was at the local cemetery mourning the loss of his dead parents, only to catch him orgasming, dick out and all, over an unearthed corpse. His excuse, after being caught in the act, was that something about the air made him cum.

Then there was the fact that he mostly spoke in puns. It wasn’t noticeable when he was around other ponies but when they were alone or around Fluttershy’s animals, he would make the most unbearable puns. He must have thought it was cute or funny but it was neither of those things. In fact, Rarity had asked him to stop multiple times but he hadn’t yet.

Then there was his blunt honesty, which hurt her feelings more times than she could remember. He mostly only did it when they were alone but she stuck it out because she thought he would stop. She asked him to stop multiple times as well. She stayed with him because she always thought he would stop but some small piece of her always knew he would never stop no matter how many times she asked.

The entire town would be incredibly disappointed if they found out about her deeds. It was unfortunate to be the most popular in the town, sometimes. It was unfortunate to be so liked and looked up to. It was unfortunate to being dating a stallion that was as well liked and as looked up to as her. Her evil deeds that she had been committing behind Thunderlane’s back for nearly over one month now were deeds that could ruin her reputation. Her friends would leave her, nopony would buy her clothes anymore and she would be all alone. Her dreams and hopes would be ruined.

If the town found out that she was, to put it bluntly, fucking another stallion on the side then everything that she had built for herself in her life would be ruined. Even if this particular stallion that she found was much better than Thunderlane, nopony would care. They would throw tomatoes in her mane and call her insults and horrible things behind her back.

He was good to her. He smelled of caramel, he didn’t speak in puns and he always made sure that Rarity finished first. He even knew that he was a side stallion and didn’t care. He loved her anyways. She loved him. How was that evil? Bad? Cheating?

“Rarity,”

Rarity looked up, just as the lights in her shop blinked to life. She blinked, attempting to allow her eyes to adjust to the bright lights. How had they come on? Who was in her boutique? Had she been found out?

Indeed she had, because there, in the center of her shop, stood Thunderlane and Twilight.

“T-Thunderlane? T-Twilight?” Rarity rushed to her hooves, looking bewildered. “What brings you here at such a time at night?” She hoped that she could still lie her way out of this.

“You told me you were going to bed early,” Thunderlane stated, ever so calmly, his soup smell wafting off him. How did she not notice the soup smell earlier? Oh right, probably because her entire shop smelled of soup, no thanks to him.

“So?” Rarity bit back, knowing exactly where this was going. Her secret was out, so she might as well stop caring. “You were stalking me?”

“You lied to me, Rarity!” Thunderlane snapped. “I saw you go into Caramel’s house! I peeked into his window and saw you making love to... to him! You cheated on me!”

“Rarity,” Twilight interjected, her lips quivering and her ears flat upon her head, “How could you?”

“I’ve had enough of this horse manure, Thunderlane,” Rarity snapped back. She stood proudly up before him. “You’re-”

“No, you listen here,” Thunderlane seethed, stepping forward. “I forbid you from ever going back to his house. You’re mine, not his and I’d better not ever catch you going back there again because if I do...” He made a punching motion with his hoof.

Rarity shrunk back under his gaze. She could see Twilight’s shocked expression as Thunderlane revealed his true colors. However, before Rarity could do anything, Twilight stepped forward.

“Thunderlane,” Twilight said calmly, stepping between Rarity and Thunderlane. “I thought that said you were going to handle this peacefully.”

“I am,” Thunderlane said, straightening upwards. He seemed to regain some of his composure. “You’re welcome to go now. I’ll deal with her.”

“I think not,” Twilight said, glancing back at Rarity who seemed to cover by the door.

“I’ve got this, Twilight,” Thunderlane said. “You just have to know how to handle mares.” He punched the air forcefully. Rarity shivered.

Twilight stared at Thunderlane, “Thunderlane, go home.”

“Now you listen here,” Thunderlane said, poking at Twilight’s chest. “You may be Princess of Equestria but you do not tell me how to handle my relationships. Mares ought to be taught their place. I’d teach you yours if you were dating me.”

Twilight calmly straightened herself. “Well, as the Princess of Equestria, I’m telling you how to handle your relationships. You are to break off your relationship with Rarity immediately by order of me or face exile from Ponyville.”

Thunderlane gaped at Twilight. “I-I… what?”

“Leave,”

“You can’t do this!” Thunderlane said angrily.

“I think I just did,” Twilight said, smirked.

“You can’t kick me out of town for the way I handle my relationships,” Thunderlane pushed back. “This isn’t a crime.”

“No, but public indecency is. I recall Scootaloo reporting that you had your penis out at a cemetery. You were standing over her sister’s grave. Shall I mention that your anger outbursts are still happening at your job despite your mandatory anger management classes? Shall I have you fired? Or should I throw you in the Canterlot dungeons for threatening to assault an Element of Harmony?” Twilight asked, stepping forward and pressing her muzzle into Thunderlane’s face. “Or perhaps, if we were to dust away the makeup on Rarity’s face, would we find bruises? You could get life for that, you know.”

Thunderlane growled at Twilight then stared at Rarity. He sighed then stormed past her and left. Rarity inched away from the door as he slammed it behind him. Twilight gave Rarity a sympathetic look.

“You didn’t need to handle that, darling,” Rarity mumbled, barely making eye contact at her rescuer. “I would have handled it.”

“No you wouldn’t have,” Twilight shook her head. She immediately embraced Rarity. “You should always come to me or anypony else if you need help. Even if your relationship looks perfect on the outside, if it isn’t on the inside, don’t be afraid to tell somepony.”

“Thank you.” Rarity replied. “Does he really have charges for public indecency?”

“He has more than just simple public indecency on his account. There are numerous accounts of sexual harassment from this guy,” Twilight said, “The girls and I weren’t sure how you could come to love somepony so awful but we wanted to be supportive and we got the town to go along with it. We weren’t aware that you were trapped with him,” Twilight blinked away a few tears. “I’m sorry. This is my fault.”

“It’s not your fault,” Rarity said, nuzzling Twilight’s neck. “I didn’t realize he was like this and before I knew it, I was a prisoner in my own love life. I was desperate for love, after my breakup with Spike. He somehow managed to convince me that he was the only pony who would ever love me again. By the time that I had met Caramel, I was too frightened to leave him for fear of my reputation.”

“Rarity,” Twilight sobbed, “I should have noticed something was wrong. I’m sorry it got this far.”

“I still hold nothing against you,” Rarity said, stroking Twilight’s mane. “You’ve done nothing wrong.”

“Mayor Mare and I wanted to keep his actions hushed up in hopes that perhaps he could turn over a new leaf, but it seems he just can’t,” Twilight stepped back, clearing her throat and stood up straight. “We’re going to banish him from Ponyville. After that, anypony can press charges on him if they want, including you.”

“That’s good, darling, but I think I’d like to leave the past behind, in the past,” Rarity smiled.

“Well, if you ever need to talk, I’m here,” Twilight said. Her horn glowed brightly before she was whisked away by a quick teleportation spell. Rarity sighed before teleporting her favorite chair under her and falling onto it. Buckets of ice cream appeared at her side.

The nightmare was over. Her mother may have said that cheaters never win, but this cheater had just won.

Author's Note

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