Into the Light

The darkness had always been comforting for me. Maybe that was just because of how often it had saved me. Or maybe it was something to do with being a necromancer.

Maybe I was a monster, drawn to the shadows where ponies feared to tread.

But no matter what the case may have been, I was thinking, so I was alive. That could either be a very good thing, or a very, very bad thing.

A moment after I realized I was alive, I began to feel my body. Couldn't really tell much, but at least I was still in it. That was always a plus.

I opened my eyes. Or at least I tried to. They cracked open a hair, but I really couldn't see anything. So I let them fall shut, and decided to try moving.

One of my forelegs, I wasn't sure which, twitched some, then tried to move towards my face. It was being held down by something. Something soft.

Why would chains be soft?

Confusion was apparently enough to get my eyes to cooperate, and they shot open.

It was dark, but I could see in the dark. I was looking at the ceiling. It was white. Which was bad, because the dungeons were gray stone, and the ceiling of the throne room was much higher. So I had no clues as to my location yet. Assuming, of course, that I wasn't dead and this wasn't actually the afterlife.

I looked down, at the protest of my headache, and saw my forelegs were being held down by a silk sheet.

Oh, yeah. I was definitely dead.

Was there an afterlife? I had never thought so, since I should have gotten glimpses each time I died. Theoretically. But perhaps whatever higher being there was could tell I wasn't going to stay dead?

Well, afterlife or no, I might as well figure out where I was. I looked up, not at the ceiling, but at the walls. There were walls, actually. Not sure why that surprised me. They were also white. I could see things out of the corner of my eyes though. Things that were not wall.

So I slowly turned my head left. What I saw was probably what I was expecting, but definitely not what I wanted to see. It was a wood door. The very same door I remember seeing in the Castle halls during my last visit.

I closed my eyes and focused. My headache vanished, the pain in my muscles with it. I hadn't healed myself from the beginning since I had honestly thought I was dead, and I wasn't sure if it would have worked.

Now that I felt significantly less like a pony that had been beaten to death, I opened my eyes and threw the sheets, nice as they were, off of me. I also tried to teleport, but nothing happened. That meant I had a suppressor on. Not surprising. I reached up to my horn with a hoof and touched the infernal metal doughnut. Damn.

I slid out of the bed. Turning slowly, I looked around the whole room.

On the wall to the left of the door was a bookcase, then the bed I had just been in. The far wall had a floor-to-ceiling window, with a glass door in it leading out to a balcony.

Surely Celestia knew that even with a suppressor on, I would still resurrect, right? I could just throw myself off the balcony to escape. But if she managed to have anti-teleportation ward up in less than ten minutes, there was no telling what she had put up during the hours I had been out.

So that was probably a bad idea.

There was nothing of interest in the room, and certainly nothing to do. I wanted to stick my head out the door, just to see if the guards posted there would stab me, or run away screaming. It would be funny either way.

There were three knocks at the door.

Damn! Did she have enchantments to see when I woke up? I'm starting to see why ponies think she's omniscient.

I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to face her, or her guards, or anypony! I looked around for something, anything.

The bed. There was a space between it and the floor.

I dived under the bed. I could see my breath, just like I had been able to see it outside. I was panicking. I needed to calm down, or I was going to do something stupid.

Three knocks.

Nope! Buck calm! I'm about to actually die. I slammed my eyes shut. I was shaking. I had been in too much pain to be properly terrified before. Now though, there was nothing distracting my overactive imagination. She was going to kill me, but I couldn't even imagine how. Why would she have put me in a guest room in the castle? Why hadn't she put me in the dungeon? Or thrown me off the mountain, or in a volcano, or something?

I would like to ask you for your help

Did she mean that? Did she actually need me for something? What could I possibly do that she couldn't, or that somepony else who worshiped her couldn't? Not only that, but after everything she had done to me, why did she think I would help her?

"Silver Lining?"

My eyes shot open for the second time in as many minutes. The floor around me was covered in frost. That wasn't her voice. It was female, but it didn't belong to her. Was it a guard? I wasn't getting out from under this bed. It was nice, and dark, and comfy...

"I'm going to come in."

What? No no no, don't do that. For all you knew I was an insane monster that killed everything she saw.

"So please stay calm."

Calm? You wanted me to stay calm? I was in the abode and headquarters of the pony who I had been evading for literally my entire life, with a suppressor ring on, and you want me to stay calm?

An irrational part of me was screaming to jump off the balcony. The rational part shouted back that Celestia had certainly put measures in place to account for that. Irrational shot back, saying that even if that were true, the very worst that could happen was that I'd be forced to face the pony at the door anyway. Which sounded more rational than the part of me that I considered rational. I was definitly going crazy.

Buck this. Buck everything. I wasn't going to just go along with whatever the she-demon's plans were. I climbed out from under the bed, and sprinted for the window. I heard the door behind me open, and the pony started to say something.

I didn't hear it over the sound of smashing glass though, and then I was over the railing.

I saw the moon hanging in the sky, as everything slowed down, surrounded by tens of thousands of stars, all burning like candles. Or diamonds, or whatever poets described them as these days. Canterlot was aglow in much the same way, a few ponies milling about on the streets, despite it being freezing cold and midnight. So they must have all been inside on Celestia's orders yesterday. She claimed she didn't think I was a monster, then acted like I was one. Whatever. The gardens were below me, hundreds of beautiful flowers, many awe-inspiring statues, and lots of nice places to stay on a sunny day. To bad I'd never be able to enjoy it.

Surprisingly, nothing caught me on my way down. No enchantments, no guards meant to stop me from escaping. If she had predicted that I would do this, and this was all part of her plan, I was going to throw myself into a volcano, because there no way I could deal with a mastermind of those proportions.

I closed my eyes. Even if I was used to dying, I certainly didn't like seeing it coming.

I won't describe what hitting the ground felt like. I honestly hope nopony else ever knows what it's like to die.

When I woke up, the grass and flowers around me were completely frozen. Not the normal kind of frozen, but frozen solid. That happened when I died. I stood up, and I saw the suppressor ring on the ground. When I died, my body, or whatever was left of it, turned into a tiny but furious snowstorm, freezing everything around me. Then it reformed into a brand-new me, leaving anything I'd had on, cloak, dagger and belt, frozen and on the ground. It was bothersome in most cases, but occasionally, like when I had a suppressor on, it was very helpful.

"S-silver! Please, we don't want to hurt you!" The voice was above me, but didn't bother looking up at her.

One up-and-personal mountainside tour was coming right up.

At the bottom of the mountain, I took a moment to calm myself down, and considered my options.

Unfortunately, I didn't have my cloak or dagger, meaning I was extremly exposed. That was a minor thing though. I would find a way to hide my cutie mark or something, then I'd go into some town and get a new cloak.

For now I needed to look out for search parties. I was certain Celestia would have sent somepony out to search for me, and the moon was considerably lower in the sky.

I reached out, but felt no hearts near me. I could feel the ponies of Canterlot still, though they were faint at this distance.

I also needed to be ready for a bounty to be issued for me, and for every town and city near Canterlot to be on the lookout. It was going to be months, at best, before this died down. Well, down to what I considered normal.

I stood up, out of the frozen grass. For now none of that mattered. I just needed to get as far away from Canterlot as possible, and avoid all pony interaction. That was the safest thing.

So I began walking. Where didn't really matter. It never had before. I kept my focus on the hearts around me, or the lack thereof.

The sun came up at some point, and I still hadn't spotted a single guard. Maybe she had let me go. Why though? Why would she go through all the trouble of capturing me, just to let me get away that easily? I didn't understand. Why was she such a schemer? I could predict the actions of captains, soldiers, even regular ponies. But not her. She was always an enigma, and I hated it.

I came upon a street, running perpendicular to the direction I was walking. I decided I didn't want to follow it. I'd make my way to some town or other when I got farther away from Canterlot.

So I crossed it and kept walking.

I had seen ponies walking around the city as I fell from the balcony. Why had they all been inside yesterday? Had Celestia known I was in Canterlot from the beginning?

I would like to ask you for your help

She couldn't be serious, right? If she wanted my help, it would have been nicer if she hadn't been quite so intimidating and controlling. Thinking about it though, I realized that there was nothing she could have done or said to convince me she didn't want to kill me.

Maybe, in the unlikely event she was serious, she wanted me to resurrect somepony. But she knew just as well as I did that if I tried to bring somepony back without the proper preparations beforehoof, all I would get was a skeleton servant. Not a pony. Did she want me to raise a skeleton army, perhaps? I'd never had more than four at one time. I had no idea how that would even work. Not only that, but Equestria had the largest standing army in the world, so that was—

Thunk

I stopped and looked up. There was a crossbow bolt in a tree to my left. Wait, tree? I looked around. I was in a forest. Since when was I in a forest? I knew I was prone to zoning out while I walked between cities, but I usually noticed when I came across a new area. The street, for example.

"Don't move, or the next one'll be in your 'eart!" I turned towards the voice. I didn't care in the least if they shot me.

I heard the string snap taught, heard the bolt slicing through the air. I could have teleported out of the way, but that would have been too much effort. I spotted the pony who had spoken just before it hit me. He was standing behind a bush, with the crossbow in a blue aura. I took a step back from the impact, and looked down at the end of the bolt sticking out of my chest. At least he made good on his promise. I vaguely wondered when I would feel that, since I often didn't feel pain at first. Perhaps it's because I make a habit out of getting myself killed.

I looked back up at him. He wasn't a guard, so he must have been a bandit or robber of some kind. Not only that, but the guards knew better than to kill me. He seemed surprised I wasn't dead yet. I sat down on my haunches, and waited. For something. Either he would get closer and something would happen, or he would leave, and I would die in peace. I didn't care. I extended my senses to the forest. There were thousands of animals and insects, but as far as I could tell, no more ponies.

He stepped out from the bush he had been hiding in. "What in the bloody hell..." he breathed. I bent over a bit as he got closer. Pain had made its return with a vengeance. I grimaced; it was only going to get worse.

He was standing over me now, probably wondering why I still hadn't died. Well that would probably change soon. I grabbed the end of the bolt with magic, and pulled it out. Even if I was ready for it, that was not nice. He yelped and jumped back in surprise. "Crazy pony!" he shouted. I had two options, now that the bolt was out of my chest. I could heal myself, or I could just die and let that take care of the stallion.

Dying was easier. Since when was I so lazy? I didn't care. I collapsed into the snow and closed my eyes, taking comfort in the darkness. This was my fifth death today. Not a record, not by a long shot, but still more than I would have liked.

When I woke up, the pain was gone. I sat up, surrounded by frozen plants, grass, and one very surprised looking ponycicle. Getting up, I sighed. Why couldn't I just walk through the forest in peace? I looked up, trying to see through the canopy. As far as I could tell, it was sometime around late afternoon. I'd been walking for twelve hours. Funny, it had only felt like a few minutes.

I shook my head, that didn't matter, I was still way too close to Canterlot. So I started walking again.

I wondered why I hadn't noticed the forest. Usually I paid just enough attention to avoid things like what had just happened. What if it had been a guard? Or worse, Celestia herself, who would somehow know exactly where I was. I shook my head. She was a psychotic control freak, but she didn't know everything. I couldn't let her get to me like this.

If I let her drive me crazy, she'd win without even doing anything. That would be humiliating.

I glanced around me, trying to pay more attention now. Nothing but trees and snow. I would walk for a few days and see where I ended up. Whatever she wanted, I didn't care. I just needed to stay on the move, away from anypony that might be able to tip her off to my location.

Some small, out-of-the-way town would do nicely.