Heroes travels

Hey guys. Here's what I'm going to do. If you saw my recent blog posts, you would know that I've been a bit busy with coursework which ended up with me in a writing block. I was originally going to post the huge chapter I had written. BUT. Stalking_Z0mbie suggested that I seperate the huge chapter into smaller ones, making it easier for you guys to read. If I post a blog, I want to hear what you want to say and I'll respond as fast as I can (Same goes for comments.)

Now then, the following few chapters are what I had and I've only done a bit of editing on them to seperate the huge chapter into smaller ones. I'm currently writing the drinking scene as soon as I finish typing this author's note.

Now here's the plan over the next few chapters. I will post the chapters I have hourly (the third will be posted at 3PM GMT and hopefully, the drinking scene will be done at the end of the day and posted as well. If not, I'll try to get it done tomorrow and post it on that day A.S.A.P.

After I post the drinking scene, I'll begin on the recovery chapter and will take a small break to think of some more chapters before I go onto one of the ideas that Azzazel messaged me. (So yeah, don't spoil that second idea you posted to me Azzazel.  I'd like to keep it a bit of a surprise for the others.) I don't want to waste any more space up here, read the rest of the A/N at the bottom once you finish this chapter.

***

After sleeping only until 7:30AM, not only did Ashley awake as if he had a full nights rest but Callum, who was on the other side of town sleeping in one of Applejack’s trees at Sweet Apple Acres, had awoken around the same time as well. Just in time to help out Applejack with farming.

The biggest surprise though for Ashley was that the mysterious voice that haunted his dreams for the past couple of nights had not shown up during his most recent slumber, shrugging it off, he went with the fact it was his mind playing tricks on him and that he can finally have a normal night’s sleep once more, he decided that another couple of hours sleep could do some good.

“Howdy A.J.” Callum greeted the southern pony with his own southern tone from the tree. Applejack looked around for a moment before looking up to see the human relaxing in one of her family’s trees.

“Howdy back at ya, Cal.” The orange pony greeted the human with a small nod “Have a good night’s sleep?”

Shifting his body to the right slightly, Callum prepped his legs to land on the soft grass covered dirt but miserable failed since he smashed right into the ground, although his recovery was fast. “I’ve slept in worse places.” The human smiled as if nothing happened.

Applejack shook her head “Ya have a perfectly good bed at the station yet y’all sleep in mah trees. Why?”

“Well for starters…” Callum took in a deep breath, taking in the fresh morning air “The scent of apples is a good thing to wake up to, the view is amazing, it won’t take me long to come to the farm to help out since I’m already on it and…” Callum stopped himself early, raising suspicions from Applejack.

“And what?”

“Your trees are comfy.” Callum chuckled lightly, reaching his left arm backwards, under the back of his shirt to find a small piece of the tree stuck in his skin “Well, when you get past the very rare splinters.” Grabbing the harming tiny piece of wood with his fingernails, he pulled it out and flicked it away.

Applejack smiled with a small laugh “Y’all never going to change are ya Cal?” Callum shook his head “Right, let’s get to work then.” Applejack said as she turned towards the nearby barn.

“Sure.” Callum took his place beside the orange mare “Are you still up for tonight?”

“Tonight?” Applejack asked with a slightly raised eyebrow.

“Y’know, drinking?”

“Ooooh.” Applejack smiled “Sure as day I’m lookin’ forward to it.”

“Cool, those who are going can meet up at Twilights at eight thirty tonight.”

Around thirty seconds of walking, both human and pony had arrived at the barn. Big Macintosh was inside, putting empty baskets into a large wooden cart for him to pull later. Seeing both his sister and Callum walk in, he gave them a brief nod followed by a “Mornin’.”

“So what’s the work for today?” Callum asked, rubbing his hands together.

“We need to get the harvest from the south-east section of the farm, check on the trees in the north section and load up a few bushels for A.J. to sell later.” Big Mac said, attaching himself to the cart.

“Alrighty then.” Callum said as all three of them left the barn.

“So.” Big Mac began “How’d ya first night at Neon’s go last night?” Applejack was also curious to how well the human did.

“Went pretty well If I say so myself.” Callum began with a slightly amused tone “Neon was having a bit of a pickle since her old bar pony had moved out of town yesterday and her new one doesn’t arrive until later today I think. So being the gentleman I am, I decided to assist Neon in her time of need by helping behind the bar. Ponies were amazed by the speed I could produce their orders. I answered some questions from Vinyl Scratch as well, cool girl, pretty fun to talk to.”

“Sounds like ya had a good night there Callum.” Applejack spoke up.

“It was pretty cool but I feel a bit sorry for Ashley.”

“How come?” Big Mac asked as the group continued down the smooth dirt path to the south east segment of the orchard.

“Well it all began with Ashley taking a group of mares to their hotel...” Callum began to tell the story of Ashley and his encounter with drunken mares in the early hours of that morning.

***

Meanwhile at the royal Canterlot castle.

***

“Ugh...” Celestia groaned, plopping her head onto the large table that he and his sister Luna were sitting at for their breakfast, although for the princess of the night, it was her dinner. Because of Ashley’s prank, she was still stuck as a male. Fortunately for her, only a few ponies had seen her new form in all its masculinity. The smooth curves of her body were now slightly more muscular, not to mention other…attributes had changed.

“You know brother.” Luna began, Celestia shot Luna a glare that would make ponies cower in fear “You know for a fact that I’ve always wanted a brother and I think this makes up for a certain practical joke that you performed on me over one thousand and fifty years ago.” Raising her hoof to her chin, she made herself look deep in through “What was it again?” removing her hoof, she glared at her new found brother with narrow eyes “Somepony thought it was funny to put crushed bananas into all of my novels, let alone my cherished history books, geography of the dragon lands, notes on the constellations I have yet to even recover...” The list went on and on.

“I already said I was sorry Luna!” With Celestia’s new found voice, Luna couldn’t help but release a loud chuckle.

“Well sometimes sorry just doesn’t cut it.” Luna chuckled as she levitated her spoon out of her soup, taking its hot contents into her mouth and swallowing “Besides, we both know that you enjoy ponies looking at you in astonishment.”

Celestia rolled his eyes, it was true that the attention had grew on him many, many years ago. “You’re enjoying this as much as you can, aren’t you?”

“What!? Me!? Enjoying my sis- I mean, my brothers suffering?” Luna was obviously faking since Celestia could judge this by her over dramatic tone “We hath no idea what thou are talking about.” ((Quick A/n: I have no idea when it comes to writing old fashioned Luna, message me corrections if you know what it should actually be.))

“Oh look, old fashioned Luna is back!” Celestia smirked, easily getting under his sisters skin.

“Oh shush.” Luna lightly waved her hoof at her brother “I’d rather be old fashioned then have my gender swapped by a species from a different planet.”

Celestia frowned at his sister but Luna ignored it.

“Oh stop it.” Luna smiled “Keep up that face and you’ll get wrinkles.” Luna giggled, seeing Celestia immediately wipe his frown of his face but, she was able to see a small grin replace it, even though he tried to hide it by looking down.

***

Back in Ponyville: Guard station Time: 10AM

***

Getting up from his bean bag, Ashley let out a long yawn alongside a stretch, getting a satisfying pop from his shoulders. His eyes were still half closed from just waking up but it was nothing a splash of cold water on the face to fix, making him more alert. He went to the sink in the shower room to do so.

“So how did it go last night?” A voice spoke from behind him, he instantly recognised it as Shockwave’s.

“How did what go?” Ashley asked, his voice muffled by the towel he used to dry his face.

Shockwave rolled his eyes “Your trip to the moon of course.”

“Not much, defeated some space parasites, flew on a cat with the body of a pop tart as it rocketed us through space with rainbows.” Ashley shrugged with a toothy grin.

“...What?” Shockwave deadpanned. Ashley knew that he wouldn’t get the basis of nyan cat. “The buck did you eat last night?”

Ashley knew that if Callum was nearby, a your mom joke would of been made. “I tried tiger blood, Charlie Sheen told me to.” Shockwave’s became even more confused. He actually thought that the human had probably drunk the blood but wouldn’t think it would have a weird effect like this. Another question in his mind was who Charlie Sheen was.

“It’s a joke.” Ashley said flatly.

“Sort of guessed that.” The unicorn laughed lightly “Y’know, with the whole cat thing and drinking blood.”

Ashley merely rolled his eyes before managing to reply. “So I’m guessing you were asking me about how I did at Neon’s last night?” Shockwave nodded “Alright, but I assure you, it isn’t very exciting...”

“Spill it.”

“Fffff-ine. All that happened was that I was the bouncer for the club, helped a group of mares to a hotel and some really awkward shit happened on the way and there is no way I’m going to live through that again.”

“Alright then.” Shockwave laughed. If Ashley wouldn’t tell him then Callum was his second choice. “Remember that I said we were going to continue our talk?” the human nodded “Good. Follow me to my office.”

Ashley reluctantly agreed, tossing the towel he used earlier behind him, not caring where it landed. He followed the captain to the pristine office. The window was open, letting in the cool fresh air fill the small room. Shockwave immediately took a seat in his chair behind his desk, putting his fore hooves together as he leaned back. Ashley preferred to remain standing, closing the door behind him.

“Right…Now tell me…” Shockwave began “What do you think about Grey Ink?”

Ashley just wanted to get this discussion over and done with, honesty would be the key role for this talk and he wasn’t going to lie. “I think that she is a beautiful, elegant, funny and smart individual who I will do anything to see a smile on her face.” Ashley sighed “To be the most honest I can be, I’ve never felt this way about someone before, yes I’ve been in love but this is much greater. Just knowing that someone loves you as much is great and proof of that is what happened yesterday.”

“Mmmhmm.” Shockwave nodded slowly, playing the big brother role seriously because he knew that’s what Grey thought of him “So this isn’t just a physical relationship?”

“I don’t want it to rely on just physical attraction, let me assure you that those types of relationships don’t last as long. I know this because of Callum and what he does.”

“One night stands and relationships that focus more on sexual feelings rather than the personality?” Shockwave asked, raising and eyebrow with a smirk.

“Yes.” Ashley nodded

“Well I can see that your mind is in the right place, but what about your heart? Do you crave to be near her? Do you wish to be by her side as much as possible?”

***

Little did either of them know, the pegasus that they were discussing was actually on the other side of the door. She had meant to be delivering a note to the captain but hearing both his and Ashley’s voices, she put her ear next to the door to try and hear as much of what they were talking about as possible.

She didn’t get to hear the entirety of their conversation, only the part about were Ashley’s heart was. Her heart was beating fast as she held her breath. She wanted to soak in every word that the human was going to say.

“If I could be right beside her right now, I would want to hold her, like I always do.” Grey instantly recognised the slightly muffled voice to be Ashley’s, she kept on listening “She’s a magnificent woman and I’m incredibly lucky that she even felt attracted to me…Have you ever been in love Shockwave?”

“Of course.”

“Then you should know what I mean. My heart does crave for her, it breaks when she’s saddened. My heart beats faster when she’s next to me.”

Shockwave remained still, watching the human pour his heart out for the pegasus. Out of the three stallions that he questioned when they were dating Grey Ink, the human was doing considerably better. The others basically told small lies to the captain, thinking that he wouldn’t pick them up but he did. He stared into Ashley’s ocean blue eyes, he knew that the human was telling the truth.

“Trust me when I say this...” Ashley sighed, folding his arms together “But I’ve never actually felt happier in my whole life until I came to Equestria...I mean, I do miss my home world since I didn’t even get to say goodbye to my friends and mother. The only person to make me feel happy was Callum and even then, there is so much a friend can do. I’m sure Callum will vouch for me that I would act positive around others even though my past still haunts me to this day, but I’m getting past it now...And I want Grey to be beside me the entire way...” Ashley gave the unicorn a sincere smile “and of course, with the help of my friends as well but like I said, there’s only so much they can do.”

If the discussion wasn’t about Grey Ink in the first hand, Ashley would have spoken more about his world, the people who he knew, the things he had done and much more, but now wasn’t the time.

“I know that this may sound a bit cheesy...but I think Grey Ink is that happiness I’ve been waiting for...Not the charade I used to put on for my friends but…Actual fulfilment… She makes me feel like there’s nothing wrong and hopefully, I do the same to her.”

Grey Ink didn’t notice a couple of tears had been shed from her eyes, hearing the words come from his mouth meant much to her. Did he really feel like that for her? Did she really mean that much to him even though they haven’t even spent a whole day to themselves? She doesn’t even know much about the human as he didn’t know much about her. She knew that she would have to change that some day.

“But…” Ashley began, Grey’s heart stopped for a moment “There are two problems…”

Oh no... Grey in thought to herself, as much as she wanted to pull away from the door, her body wasn’t listening to her. Her ear remained pressed against the door’s smooth surface.

“Oh really?” Shockwave asked “And what are they?”

“Well for starters, I want to take this slow.”

“That’s reasonable. I’m sure that she would want to as well, she does have the habit of letting her emotions take control of her, pushing herself go through a relationship faster just to keep up with the other.” Shockwave held up a hoof “But. She does know that if her partner wants to take their time then she’ll wait.”

Grey Ink had a faint smile on her face, knowing the fact that the captain was always there for her and pinpointed her last two relationships in a single sentence, but she knew that there was another problem, her heart began to ache more as time drew by for the next problem to be heard.

“Mmhmm. What’s the second?”

“Well, from where I come from, different species relationships are forbidden and highly frowned upon. Not saying that I’m just going to ditch her because of this but…It’s just going to take me a while to get used to but I know I’ll prevail with Grey.”

The grey pegasus’ chest felt slightly heavier, her face had risen in temperature as well. Her face had begun to style a faint blush. Is he giving up something up from his past life to just be with me? She assumed in her thoughts. She wanted to just burst into the room and hold the human...No, her human, in the tightest hug she could muster.

“You don’t have to worry much about an interspecies relationship here but I hope you become comfortable with the fact soon.” Shockwave began with a smile “They are common in Equestria. Ponies usually mix with dragons, gryphons and even diamond dogs. Of course, there are ponies who think otherwise about those relationships, saying that they are undignified and that the pony is possessed or dirty or that they are ruining the pure image of our species.” Shockwave chuckled “But there is a problem that may surface soon.”

“How so?” Ashley asked.

Shockwave took a long, hard sigh, shaking his head to the sides slowly for a moment “Her parents are like what I just described. Hopefully they’ll make an exception of you but I won’t guarantee that.”

My parents? Grey Ink thought to herself, looking back at her parents in her memories, her eyes quickly widened. Oh sweet Luna! I totally forgot about them! They are definitely not going to like this..  Grey Inks parents are quite old fashioned, thinking that the pegasus race is the best of all three types of pony species (excluding alicorns due to them having both horns and wings, therefore are given the okay because of the wings and the fact that the only two of them are the princesses.)

“Onto another topic.” Shockwave began. He wanted to know more on the human’s beliefs and his moral fibre more than anything, making sure that there wouldn’t be much trouble in the relationship. After all, he was looking out for Grey to make it easier on her if they were ever to break up and to see if they were compatible. “…Same sex couples are very common in Equestria. ” Ashley raised an eyebrow at the captain, not knowing why he would bring up such a subject. “Due to there being a larger ratio of females in Equestria, some were bound to go for their own gender. Of course there are those who oppose such a thing but the numbers of ponies who do are very, very slim. ”

“What is the ratio of males?”

“Around twenty seven percent of the population is male.”

“Wow…It’s that bad?” Ashley asked, Shockwave gave a swift nod “It’s pretty even back home.”

“So…What are your thoughts on same sex relationships?” Shockwave asked, it wasn’t relative to their original discussion but it was good to know such a thing about someone.

“I’m cool with them.” Ashley shrugged “Who am I to judge who falls in love with who?”

Shockwave smirked, this was the answer he wanted to hear. “What about Callum?”

“He’s the same way.”

“Good to know.” Shockwave gave a brief smirk. He knew that Grey Ink would do well with the human but he still needed to know more about him but that would have to be for another time. “You can go now. We’ll continue our little interview some other time.” He waved him off with his hoof.  A thought occurred to the captain as Ashley’s hand slowly reached for the door.

“Oh and Ashley…” Shockwave said, grabbing the human’s attention “Promise me you won’t hurt her.”

Ashley gave the captain a sincere smile “You have my word Shockwave. I’ll try my best not to.”

“Good, because if you do.” The captain narrowed his eyes “I’ll hunt you down and make you wish you were never born.” The threat didn’t even do anything to the human, knowing he could put down the captain at anytime he wanted but it was threat nonetheless, he took it seriously since after all, the captain is pretty much like a brother to Grey and Ashley just wanted their relationship to go as smooth as possible. He gave a brief nod before opening the door to leave.

Grey Ink started to panic slightly, her blush almost instantly vanished, wiping her tears, she turned away from the door in desperate plea of her escape to make it look like she wasn’t eavesdropping.

She thought that she had gotten away.

“Oh hey Grey.” Ashley said happily as he closed the door behind him, laughing a bit at the small rhyme.

She was wrong.

***

Sweet Apple Acres

***

During the story that Callum told to Applejack and Big Macintosh about Ashley’s night with the drunken mares, both ponies and himself couldn’t stop laughing, thinking of situations of their own that would happen to the brown haired man.

“That should just about do it.” Callum exclaimed as he lifted the final basket of apples onto Big Mac’s cart. The red stallion nodded at his human friend before trailing off to Ponyville, alongside him was Applebloom since he was taking her to go see the other members of the CMC.

“Y’know Cal…” Applejack began as both she and the human began walking up the smooth dirt trail towards the Apple family’s house on top of a small hill. “Y’all should see Granny Smith. Ah’m sure she’d be thrilled to meet ya.”

“If you want to introduce me to her then I’m game.” Callum replied, a small grin on his face. He wanted to get to know everyone in the town, especially the Apple family. He admired how close they were, how hard they worked and the fact that they were a proud family all in all.

It didn’t take either of them long to reach the wooden house that occupied the Apple family. It had a rustic charm to it, an amazing view of the farm and the sky, as well as the Everfree. The floorboards of the porch would creak under Callum’s boots as he walked up the steps with Applejack by his side. The building and the view reminded him of his dream home. The only thing that was missing though was a swimming pool and a Ferrari in a garage nearby. He admired the Apple family’s simplicity to things right down to how they work.

“Oh is that you Applejack?” A voice called out, Applejack obviously knew whose elderly voice belonged to, Callum decided to go with Granny Smith since that’s who they were here for.

“Yes Gran-gran.” Applejack replied, noticing Callum snickering behind her.

“Hehe...Gran-gran.” Callum said with a light chuckle, it was loud enough for Applejack to pick up so she narrowed her eyes at him.

“Ah’ve come here to let ya meet somepony.” Applejack called out from the front room.

“Oh! has mah little apple found a somepony?” A wrinkly pony walked into the room, she immediately looked back and forth between Callum and Applejack with narrow eyes “That ain’t no pony.”

Callum thought it would be best to introduce himself to the mare now, giving the old pony a pleasant smile. “Good morning Miss Smith, it is a pleasant to make acquaintance with another member of the Apple family. My name is Callum Thomson. Human.”

“Well it’s to meet ya Calibration.” Granny Smith smiled, Callum rolled his eyes with a smile “And stop with that fancy shmancy talk, we Apple’s are simple folk.”

“Well alrighty then!” Callum exclaimed in a Texan accent

Granny Smith raised an eyebrow at Callum, turning her head to Applejack.

“Don’t worry, he does this a lot.” Applejack nudged Callum in the side of the leg with her hoof, hard.

“I Didn’t know you like to be the dominant one A.J.” Callum teased. As much as he wanted to bring up the whole rope thing again, now wasn’t the time since first impressions matter after all. Applejack responded with an ever harder punch, this time in his stomach, sure it hurt a bit but it didn’t wind him. “Try being a bit softer and go lower next time babe.”

The Stetson wearing pony merely growled at the human, she was almost at boiling point before she would bludgeon the idiotic creature next to her into submission. Callum decided it would be the best option to stop, he thought that it his little jokes can wait until later.

“Ahh.” Granny Smith began, forgetting the amount of awkwardness that was held before her. “Ah’ll be right with ya.” She walked over to a nearby table, picking up a newspaper, pointing to the front page “Are ya that fella?”

Callum walked over to Granny Smith and gently took the paper, bringing closer to his eyes, he bagan to read it aloud…

NEW SPECIES IN EQUESTRIA!

That’s right fellow Equestrian’s, a new species HAS BEEN CONFIRMED to be in Equestria. No, we’re not talking about a hybrid animal but something completely out of this world! That’s right! OUT OF THIS WORLD! In other words, aliens are in Equestria!

Now before you go onto thinking that there is an invasion and we’re all going to be gobbled up by the space travelling race, please note that for starters that these creatures DO eat meat but are omnivorous, for those who don’t know: An omnivore is a type of animal that can eat both vegetation and meat.

The aliens are known as Homosapiens (A weird name but they are from a different planet!) or as they prefer, Humans.

What they look like: Imagine a large monkey, hairless (With the exception of a mane), they are taller than an average pony (Around the same height as princess Celestia herself). They stand on their hind legs (They do not have tails to balance themselves. They walk on their hind legs all the time and as we know, ponies cannot manage to do so for more than a minute due to our bodies not being anatomically correct to perform such a task.)

They have hands, now you’re probably wondering “What are hands?”. Well we are here to tell you about them of course! Now it is hard to explain so we had one of our best artist’s draw their basic shape, the image below should show you what they are.

Right below the text was an accurate drawing of a human hand. Fingers were labelled on the image as well, Callum continued to read.

We would like to thank a pony named Lyra Heartstrings from Ponyville who happily gave us inside knowledge of the appendage and giving a very detailed description of them for our artist to draw.

Now, back onto their diet. As we said, yes they eat meat. BUT, they have sworn not to eat anypony (you can let out that sigh of relief now reader). As it turns out, the animals they eat are cows, chicken, pig and fish. We will go into more detail about that subject later. As for delicious greens, the humans find hay, grass and flowers to be inedible but are capable of eating things such as carrots, apples, cupcakes and a large variety of fruit and vegetables. Again, we will go into detail about this later.

Now onto the humans themselves! There are two of them, both male and yes, they speak full Equestrian. One of them is slightly taller than the other, bit larger on the muscular scale and has a short black mane. This human goes by the name of ‘Callum’ and from we have heard, he allows friends to call him ‘Cal’ for short. This human tends to be with the other human much. We do not know if they are mating partners or that the males always stick in pairs since they are a different species and have a different culture compared to us ponies.

We have heard rumours that the human world DOES NOT have magic (Shocking we know!) but their race relies more on their much advanced technology. An example of this can be that they managed to get their own species onto their moon and back (That’s right, space travel!) and that they have machines that are capable of allowing them to fly (Imagine a very large metal bird, how it flies? We have no idea.)

Now, a quick bit of info for you ponies, both of these humans ARE HIGHLY TRAINED SOLDIERS. From what we have heard, they have killed but done so to protect others. It is advised that you DO NOT and we repeat, DO NOT TRY TO FIGHT THEM. (We don’t want ponies ending up in hospital or worse.)

How do we know? Well that’s simple. Our many sources say that they actually fought Celestia’s guards when she went to see them. They completely wiped out both earth pony and Pegasus squads with ease. (We will not be going into detail about what they did in those fights due to younger readers may re-enact their methods, nor do we condone violence in that matter). Now we all know about captains Night Wind and Solar now don’t we? Yes? Good. Why did we mention them? Well because they fought the humans as well!

The battle was in fact going into both of the captain’s favour until a very tragic incident happened involving Night Wind using a memory spell on one of the human’s (Not Callum). The result ended with Night Wind having his horn forcibly removed but was tended to almost immediately by Celestia herself, followed by another tragic event that we will cover shortly.

Now we have cleared up that small segment, let us continue on Callum. We have received word that both he and the other human are close (This drove the theory of being a pair / mating partner’s further.) and he is willing to protect him with his own life (Rumours say that Ashley will do the same for him as well). Now onto some of his diet, we have been told that this human is fond to consuming alcoholic beverages and sweet tasting foods such as cakes. It has been noted that he eats fruits such as apples but we have yet to see / go into further detail about his dietary habits. (We have many sources that say that both humans have promised not to eat meat during their stay in our country.)

Now let us being on Ashley, the second human.

This human is the smaller one of the two (Only by a few inches and is not as big in muscle) but is just as dangerous, if not more. He goes by a rule of ‘First blood / first strike’. You might be wondering what this is, again we are here to give you the information you need. From what we can tell / what we have heard, the first strike rule means that Ashley will not engage in physical combat unless his opponent makes the first move BUT we figure that this is more about fighting with honour compared to both humans previous line of work.

Small note: Remember that we said the humans were soldiers? Well they are, just like the royal guard but on a bigger scale. They serve the purpose of an army role and we judge that soldiers from their world will die for their country. Idiotic? Maybe. Respectable? Yes.

Now this human has been known to be the faster of the two when it comes to speed and has a better agility than Callum. This makes them both a dangerous pair to fight. Now, remember that horrible incident that we mentioned earlier after their fight with Night Wind and Solar? Remember only a couple of issues ago we reported about a diamond dog attack on Ponyville and that it was saved by a mysterious figure?

Well, Ashley was that figure.

That’s right, the alien did indeed save ponies but done it through indescribable violence. We received word that he ran into the Everfree forest that night to recover from Night Wind’s spell which apparently brought back repressed memories.

We do ask that you please do not badger Ashley or Callum about these memories unless the human’s themselves decide to tell. We do not know what they are fully capable of and it’s best to give you some warnings unless you want to end up in hospital.

Now onto his diet, Ashley (Or as his friends call him, Ash or Toast.), unlike Callum, prefers to not eat sweet tasting foods such as cakes. It was reported by a few ponies that they saw him vomit after eating a cupcake and that the human tries his best to stay clear of Ponyville’s infamous Sugarcube Corner. This means that each human’s diet will vary, much like a pony’s, so he has his likes and dislikes from the looks of it. He prefers to eat more sour foods, such as lemons (That is what we have heard) and will eat a variety of fruit.

Now, for the final segment of this report, What are the humans doing in Equestria? Well we here at The Equestrian Inquirer have learned that both…Wait for it…

BOTH HUMANS ARE PART OF THE ROYAL GUARD!

What!? Is that true!? You bet it is. Our intelligence says (Wow, we sure do have a lot of sources for these discoveries, don’t we?) that the humans have been assigned to the princesses themselves! Callum has been assigned to Princess Celestia while Ashley is assigned to Princess Luna. Both humans have emblems on their shirts (We forgot to mention, their species always wears clothes to hide their more private parts of their body and to keep them warm since they lack fur).

We can only say that their emblems consist of the following:

Callum: Uniform is dark grey with an emblem that is Celestia’s cutie mark with (what we assume) a knife and a weird ‘L’ shaped object crossing over them, we hope to ask them about it / receive more information on this subject.

Ashley: Black uniform with his emblem being much like Callum’s but instead of Celestia’s sun, it is a half moon, showing his allegiance to the night princess herself.

Now you’re probably thinking ‘But they’re aliens! What are they doing in the guard!?’

Well, we here at The Equestrian Inquirer will provide you the answers. Princess Luna herself admitted to us privately that her brother (Brother? We’re not sure what she means but she said that she will tell us another time and that it does in fact, involve the humans.) And herself find that it is better to have them working for them rather than against them (Like we said, we have no idea what they can do.)

Where are the human’s living?: In Ponyville of course, being that is the location that they are stationed under the rule of captain Shockwave who had this to say about the human’s:

‘From what I can remember, Callum and Ashley have known each other from the age of three years old and before you ask, they are twenty five years old. I do not know who is the older of the two or their birthdays. I will tell you that Ashley does not like parties for that matter. They are both excellent additions to the guard and I’m eager to see not only their training is like but to see how they work as a team.

Even though we did have a bad introduction of the human’s appearing here, I assure you that they are devoted to protecting the habitants of Ponyville like I and those who are also in the royal guard. I know that the humans and I are going to get along just fine.’

We think that should cover an introduction with the human’s. Also to Callum and Ashley; If you’re reading this (or had somepony read it to you in case you can’t read our language), we would really appreciate if we could interview you two for an issue. We here at T.E.I. would love to ask you some questions to see everything we have heard is true or false and much more.

Also we hope that the guard’s new alien members catch whoever turned Celestia’s coat pink and bring them to justice!

(Even though many members of the T.E.I. found it to be quite humorous, some of thought it was inappropriate behaviour while some thought she looks good in pink.)

We here at T.E.I send our many thanks to those who submitted information from Ponyville about the new species to us. Once we have confirmed the information with the humans themselves, we shall put the names of those responsible for the information in the next issue.

This article was written by Quick Note.

“Well…” Callum was slightly surprised by the amount of information the newspaper was able to achieve. He knew he would have to talk to Ashley later about accepting the interview. “The answer to your question Granny Smith would be a yes. I am the Callum mentioned in this issue…How old is it?”

“Why it came out just this mornin’.” The elderly earth pony smiled. “What’s her name again…Flitzy Too? Ah think it was ‘er that dropped it off me. Sweet little Pegasus she is with that bubbly personality of ‘ers.”

“You mean Ditzy Doo?” Callum asked, receiving a nod from Granny Smith “I didn’t know she was a mail person.”

“Y’all know that you’re basically famous across Equestria now.” Applejack pointed out. It did occur to Callum that both he and his friend would most likely have to accept the interview offer to get questions out of the way. Heck, maybe he and his friend could make it a bit more fun for themselves, that and the fact that last night, Vinyl Scratch told him about the newspaper and how it was the largest selling in Equestria. Who knows how many ponies have already read the article already. And it wasn’t even lunch time yet!

“By the great gods, you’re right!” Callum slightly anxious voice filled the room, he didn’t know if it was a good or a bad thing.

Now that all that has been taken care of, sorry for the large author's note but it was needed. Remember, once this story reaches 200 fav's (it's on 199 right now, holy shit.) I'll want everyone. That's right. EVERYONE to send in questions for the characters of this story to answer. Why? Because 200 favs is a big deal to me and I want to do something for you guys. I'll let you guys know inside an A/N when this story reaches 200 fav's.

These questions can be about ANYTHING. Just send me a message with the following:

Subject: Special chapter Q's

(Format for questions)

Character name: (You can put more than one character's name in here. E.g. = Character name: Luna and Celestia, All characters.

Question: (Your question here)

Fuck. Didn't mean to make the A/N that long, oh well. It was all important. I'll stop rambling and get back to writing. (Also, FUCK YES. 34K views and this is only chapter 34.. Thanks guys, you're all amazing.)