It was late at night, and Carrot Top was feeling restless. Following the - admittedly enjoyable - incident with the honey bucket, Carrot had convinced Derpy to take down the trap, and it seemed like Carrot & Derpy's life was about to go back to normalcy, with no more crazy hijinks that ended with Carrot Top squished up against her secret delight. But the next day, another muffin had supposedly gone missing, and Derpy went right back into her siege-defending frenzy. Derpy had set up a new trap in the kitchen, swearing on her honor as a pastry gourmand, that this one couldn't misfire.

"When someone takes a muffin off of the plate, like so" explained Derpy, helping herself to a blueberry muffin, "they have thirty seconds to punch in the secret code over here." she explained, motioning to a console on the wall that was now displaying a 30-second countdown on its screen. "I'm gonna put it in now, close your eyes, please." Carrot Top played along, but assured Derpy,

"You can tell me the code. I won't tell anyone, especially not... muffin thieves," she added, hoping that last part would sell it.

"Oh, I know you wouldn't do it on purpose, but these muffin thieves have ways of making people talk." She just happened to adjust her bra strap at that moment, causing her breasts to wobble a little.

"Touche." said Carrot silently.

"But you should be ready when the muffin thief comes. I want you to have these." She offered Carrot her handcuffs, net gun, and a billy club.

"Derpy, I don't think I need any of this..."

In the end, they had compromised on Carrot taking just the billy club, and keeping it within arm's length of her bed. It seemed like the best solution; she'd seen things gets out of hand with the other two items, but the chances of any weird erotic stuff happening with a simple rod - Carrot put that at slim-to-none. All of a sudden, Carrot heard a creaking noise coming from downstairs, and not a quiet one. It definitely sounded like footsteps on floorboards. "Probably nothing. Derpy's gotten in my head again. Still...better safe than sorry," she decided. Taking the billy club, and making her way silently down the stairs, Carrot Top nearly screamed at what she saw. Walking around like they owned the place, some prowler was heading into the kitchen. "Holy Celestia. Was Derpy right?"

Adrenaline overtook fear, and Carrot raised the club as she approached the unknown person, successfully sneaking up behind without being noticed. She grabbed the burglar by the shoulder. "Turn around very slowly, and put your hands up," she snarled. The burglar didn't even flinch. "HEY!" barked Carrot, "I'm talking to y-" She couldn't finish that sentence. What she saw next made her choke on her words in shock. She had yanked on the mystery intruder's shoulder to forcefully turn them around and face her, but couldn't believe the cross-eyed face she saw. "DERPY!?!?!?!" Her busty, bubble-headed roommate stood before her, wearing nothing but a blank expression on her face.

"Uhhhh," said Derpy, and she continued to shuffling towards the kitchen as if she hadn't even noticed Carrot Top. Carrot waved her hands in front of Derpy's face, but got absolutely no reaction from her.

"Derpy... are you sleepwalking?" Derpy muttered something unintelligible in response as she approached the muffin plate, and with precision that shouldn't have been possible in her state, picked up a muffin and took a bite. "Wait a minute," said Carrot, finally connecting the dots, "she's not just sleepwalking, she's sleep-eating! Derpy is the muffin thief!!!" As Derpy continued to munch contentedly, Carrot Top mused, "won't she be surprised when I tell her tomorrow. Still, I can't help but feel like I'm forgetting something." Then she noticed the glowing console on the wall. Just as it was programmed to do, it started the countdown when Derpy picked up the muffin, and now only 10 seconds were left. "Derpy, wake up! We need the code, now!"

"Hmmm?" asked Derpy, not appearing to be conscious.

"DERPY!!! THE CODE!!!" yelled Carrot Top, shaking Derpy. This made her boobs bounce all around, but accomplished little else. The console glowed red and made a feint but ominous buzzing noise. Time was up. Suddenly, Carrot top felt a simultaneous rib-crushing and whiplash. The trap had activated, and she and Derpy were now bound together face-to-face with thick ropes, hanging about halfway between the floor and the ceiling, and sweet Celestia, the ropes were tight. The trap had been designed to capture one muffin thief, but with two people, it was like Derpy trying squeeze her girls into a D-cup bra - which Carrot admitted, had been quite the spectacle. In short, moving around was nearly impossible, but Carrot had noticed somewhat of a silver lining. "Holy Celestia, you've got to be kidding me."

Her hands, through complete accident, had ended up on Derpy's massive mammaries. She felt a burning heat, radiating from her heart and coursing through her body, as well as a slight dampness downstairs. She tried to move her hands off, honestly she gave it her all, but no matter what she tried, she only managed to squeeze and grope Derpy harder. As her hands sank deeper, almost getting swallowed up by Derpy's enormous funbags, it was so tempting to forget about everything and just play with them all night, but she knew that was wrong. Adjusting herself so that she was just incidentally touching them, she took a deep breath.

"DER-" she was about to yell at Derpy again, but stopped herself. If she yelled anymore, she'd wake up the neighbors, they'd come running, and they'd see this. Carrot Top had to make a decision; either convince the neighbors that this wasn't what it looked like, or escape from a trap that would perplex Harry Hoofdini. Mulling it over, she decided that escape was by far the easier option. Looking around the room, she couldn't see anything sharp - they kept all the knives in drawers, which were about a foot too low for Carrot to reach. The console, though, that might be reachable, and maybe Derpy's disarm code would also undo the trap after it was sprung. "Derpy!" she tried one more time, as loud as she dared, "What. Is. The. Code????"

"M.....Muff....ffinsssss." drawled Derpy

"Muffins? Is that the code?" asked Carrot Top. But Derpy's slight moment of consciousness had passed, and she was sleeping soundly once again. "Welp, not like I've got anything better to try. Now, to get over there..." Carrot started squirming as much as the ropes would allow, sort of like doing The Worm. Gradually, she felt herself and Derpy begin to swing back and forth. How Derpy had still not woken up, she'd never know. "Sorry about this, Derpy," she whispered. Squirming harder caused her to grind up against Derpy, and squeeze her tits harder, but there was no other option. This was all business, no pleasure, she reminded herself. Eventually, she had enough pendulum momentum to swing all the way across the room. Eyes on her target, she opened her mouth wide, and clamped down on the edge of a cabinet with her teeth, and the security panel with her foot. The sudden stop caused Derpy's body to slam into Carrot, causing her to moan with pleasure, but just barely hold on with her teeth. On the console, the screen displayed "ENTER PASSWORD" and seven blank spaces. Carrot Top reached out with her toe, and typed out "M-U-F-F-I-N-D" "Thit!" she cursed through the mouthful of cabinet. The console buzzed and a message flashed on screen,

"INCORRECT PASSWORD. ELECTROSHOCK WILL BE DEPLOYED AFTER 2 MORE FAILED ATTEMPT(S)" Carrot gasped, and lost her grip, swinging back to the center of the room, whispering out a few more expletives. After getting over her frustrations and calming down (being forced to fondle Derpy's wondrous orbs had that effect) Carrot Top gave it some thought, and decided she had nothing to lose from one more try. She began shimmying again, but then paused - something was poking her. Replaying the events in her head, she realized that she had never put down the billy club, so naturally, it had gotten tangled up with her and Derpy, and now it must've shaken loose in Carrot's escape attempt. It had initially been poking Carrot's ribcage, but now it had fallen down to crotch-level

Carrot Top's preferred sleeping attire was a full-length nightshirt but nothing underneath. Now, her decision to go commando was about to become important to the plot. The handle of the club was resting innocuously against Derpy's thigh, but the business end was lined straight up with Carrot's lower lips. "No. Fucking. Way." Carrot Top tried to move every which way in hopes that the club would fall down, but it held in place. There was no two ways about it - if Carrot Top wanted another shot at the keypad, she would have to take the club inside her. Taking a deep breath, she began flexing her hip muscles again, gasping as the club began to push in past the tip, forcing her inner walls open. "I guess I'm really doing this." She swung harder and harder, as the club slid in easily, Carrot was plenty lubricated. Her swings picked up a sort of tempo, of the club slamming roughly into her, then sliding out ever so tantalizingly. She cried out with pleasure at this wonderful new sensation, really no different than riding on a sex swing while Derpy pounded her with a strap-on, and she rubbed & squeezed Derpy's breasts.

Finally, she saw the cabinet in the corner of her eye. Shaking off the love goggles, she stretched out her head, and chomped down, the abrupt braking getting her a hard thrust from the billy club. She bit down hard to keep herself steady - those teeth marks would be interesting to explain to the landlady. With a very shaky foot, she typed seven letters onto the keypad one more time, each movement flexing her love canal, allowing the club to move about slightly and tease her sensitive areas. In her near-climactic stupor, it was a long shot that she'd be able to do it...

"M-U-F-X-P-V-Q" ...and all things considered, getting three out of seven right was pretty impressive.

"INCORRECT PASSWORD. ELECTROSHOCK WILL BE DEPLOYED AFTER 1 MORE FAILED ATTEMPT(S)"

"Well great, now what?" thought Carrot Top, "...Hang on, the ropes feel a bit loose..." Observing a little closer, she realized that it was loose specifically in the damp places. "My cum is making them fall apart! All right, that gives me an idea!"

Carrot Top let go of the cabinet and kicked off, propelling herself backwards. "Here it comes." She slammed into the opposite wall, but whatever pain she felt was quickly overtook by a new sensation as Derpy and her club slammed into Carrot. And the club - fuck it, it was a dildo from now on - pushed itself all the way inside Carrot Top, and simultaneously found her clitoris. No longer caring about waking the neighbors, Carrot Top screamed out Derpy's name as she hit climax, spraying her love juices everywhere. As her senses began to dissolve, she felt herself slipping down to the floor, her body rubbing against Derpy's soft skin as she slid down. Moments after she hit the floor safely, Derpy tumbled down on top of her, pinning Carrot Top down to the floor. Derpy was somehow still asleep and unmoving, laying on top of Carrot titty-to-titty, her chest heaving with every breath. Derpy was by no means fat, but her boobs alone put her at least 30 pounds over Carrot Top. In regular circumstances it would be hard, but here, it was impossible for Carrot to get Derpy off of her.

"Guess I'm stuck like this until she wakes up," thought Carrot Top, "Derpy, you sleep as long as you like."

Author's Note

Epilogue still to come, keep watching!