Fluttershy was in the library looking for some references for a paper when she saw an out of place notebook shoved into the back. She opened it and as she read her heart grew heavier with fear. So far there was only one entry.
Entry 1 I guess
Dear journal… I'm terrified. It's been years since I wrote in you and I'm lost. I'm terrified that students in the school are going to come after me for what I have done. I'm terrified that white suits are going to find out what happened here. I'm terrified that I won't ever be forgiven for what happened but, what I'm most terrified of myself. I'm afraid of the thoughts I am having.
Fluttershy quickly looked around to see if anyone was there to witness her crying. “Who? Who could be so afraid? So... lost” Fluttershy said this quietly so one would hear. Looking around one more time to make sure so one was watching she continued reading.
I find myself drawn to the roof of the school and I don't know why. Who am I kidding, I know exactly why. Hell, I already cut so what's the point in hiding it. Yeah, I have at least 20 cuts on my left shoulder and twice that on my thighs. The bullying at my school is so bad that I believe it, in a bitch, a monster well… I'm running out of room on this page so I’ll talk later.
End
The next period bell went off as soon as Fluttershy finished reading, quickly she put it back where she found it so no one could tell she was there. If she wanted to find out who’s this is then she needed to wait.
The next day.
Fluttershy returned to the library and to her relief the book remained in the same place but, her hopes were dashed when there was another entry in the book. This one was even more desperate than the first.
Entry 2
Dear journal, after reading that last entry I jumped the gun, didn’t I? After all, you are a new journal so you don't have a clue what I'm talking about do you? Well let's start, I have had depression for a few years after I left my home and I have had PTSD for much longer, around six or seven years now. I still have flashbacks of… him. My leg never really healed right so I still have a limp, it's not that bad though. He used to say and do terrible things to me, beat me whip me and steal from me. When I left I made a new life for myself and it all came crashing down. I started burning myself pressing a hot object or flame against my skin. After a while, though It wasn't enough and I wanted- no, needed to feel more pain so I started to cut. I still do. It doesn’t help that I'm super gay and the bullying would only get worse if I buck up and tell the wrong po- person. It doesn't matter who would want a monster like me, but hey. At least I'm not a complete boffin like the white suits, all they got is book smarts. One cant survive without street smarts.
End
This wasn’t time for Fluttershy to break down and cry. She needed to think. “So let's see…” Checking again that no one was around she began to try and piece the puzzle together. One he or she regrets something, that does not narrow the list down at all. Two this person is scared of “white suits”. If she can find that out, it could help. Writing that down in her book. Three the students think she is a monster. That could only be a few students. Four the student has PTSD from an old injury. Five, the student seems to have some slip-ups in how she speaks. Like saying “buck” instead of the F-word and the “Po-”. “what words start with Po…Possibility, population, pony, postage… Pony!” It couldn't be Sunset… The bell rang ending her thoughts, quickly putting the book back.
It had been three days since Fluttershy was able to read the book, due to the weekend. Hoping that Sunset wasn't the person writing in the book but, what was in the new entry’s nearly made her drop the book.
Entry 3
I have pictured my death so many times that I have so many different ideas. A gun, a knife, jumping, hanging, drowning, drugs, thugs. Ruling the options down. A gun and drugs are too expensive. Thugs would probably do much worse things then kill me. Jumping and drowning leave too much time to chicken out. It would be easy to cut me down and revive me if I try hanging myself and then there is a knife. Easy to get ahold of, and easy to use. It wouldn't take too long either. There is no going back after u make the cut. It would be the most rational option. I should keep my eyes open for a place to do it.
End
Entry 4
I have been trying to stay strong but I can’t do it anymore, today people have been trying to attack me physically and mentally. I just barely got out of the ambush staged by some students, the diamond dogs I think. Then I just ran straight to here after seeing my locker completely covered with she-demon, go to hell and kill yourself. Why don't I give them what they want?
End
She heard the library door slam open and light sobbing coming her way. Just to be safe she quickly put the book back, grabbed her things and hid. A red-headed teen came into view. It was Sunset.
Entry ???
Goodbye
The end
Once she left Fluttershy quickly read the newest entry and ran after Sunset. Her way was blocked by students and she lost sight of her, after frantically looking around for a few minutes she saw Vinyl Scratch half leading and half carrying Sunset to the nurse office. Quickly Fluttershy joins VInyl carrying Sunset just as she loses consciousness. After they had gotten to the nurse's office Fluttershy had helped bandage Sunsets arms and convinced nurse Redheart to not go to Celestia with what happened. She knew with her animals that cornering them can drive them to make bad decisions so she chose to give her space, pressuring her may lead to something drastic.
After Sunset was taken care off she let Vinyl “talk” with nurse Redheart about what happened. “Vinyl, you know she needs someone right now and you were never mean to her or ignored her. If I suddenly became friends with her right now then she would think it’s out of pity, I will wait a bit before becoming friends with her. You and Octavia should help her.” Vinyl simply nodded and took a seat while she waited for Sunset to wake up.
Author's Note
Just one of many sort stories I plan working on in my free time.
