Left Foot, Right Hoof, Hind Feet, Augh!
Twilight had never before felt a fear of heights just from standing up.
Yet as she walked down the sunny sidewalk, her thoughts came back time and again to how she was balancing on just two legs, so that a single misstep could send her to meet the distant pavement.
It wasn't that being human again made it difficult to walk. Muscle memory ran deep. Twilight's body was right back in its biped habits, and walked fine as long as she didn't think about whether she should place a hand to the ground after a hind leg – whoa!
Twilight let out an ”Eep!” as she pitched alarmingly, arms flailing. Not thinking wasn't a winning strategy for Twilight Sparkle.
”You alright?” Sunset Shimmer asked from beside her.
”Uh, yeah! It's just that… even though it's all familiar, it's really not, y'know?”
Sunset gave Twilight the ”you're a dork and I love you for it” smile and faced forward again.
Sunset, of course, was striding. Sunset carried herself with a confidence that Twilight admired, but it also made Twilight worry about whether Sunset really was as okay as she acted with all the shenanigans their marriage put her through. Usually, though, Sunset was scarily accommodating:
”lol sunnyside i luv u wanna b ponies nao” ”lol k”
...was not how that conversation had gone, but close enough. Twilight Sparkle, full-time mom, part-time horse, had stranded herself in Equestria for the pregnancy. It had been prudent to limit giving the baby another form until the baby was done getting the one. The exile had cut Twilight off from more than she'd realized, but her friends and her wife had been there for her, and the moment she'd laid eyes on the fruit of her labor, har de har, she'd known she'd do it all again. Sweet little Sapphire, blue on blue, fountain of love, fountain of poop.
Sapph was currently napping in Sunset's arms. She still struggled with the concept of having limbs (Twilight felt a familiar stab of worry at that), and hadn't bothered to assert her property rights when they changed shape. Getting her used to oddly-shaped moms would take longer; Twilight hoped Sapph would table some objections once she found she'd still get fed.
Somewhere in the recesses of Twilight's mind, a five-year-old Twilight Sparkle in a poofy princess dress glared at her. Watch as our heroine journeys to a far-off land of castles, princesses, and magical adventures. There she'll mope on the couch, craving for blueberries. Tune in next week when she vanquishes the dreaded tax deductions.
She sent that thought packing with a burst of maturity. Her Equestrian counterpart had been frank on how often ”magical adventure” meant ”monster attack.” If she could do without wrestling Fluttershy's bear friend, she could do without that.
They'd let Sapph grow a bit before moving back to humanville. Even though Twilight'd been un-stranded, it hadn't sat right with her to set hoof in the life she left behind (the lives she and Sunset left behind, she reminded herself) until she came to stay. Sunset had handled the jaunts through the portal in their preparations for the move. As a result, Twilight's grand return left her gawking like a tourist. They were passing a park, and she was startled by the way the flower beds tackily mixed edible and inedible flowers. She was startled by the way she wasn't startled at the sounds of traffic in the distance. She was startled by the way she was supposed to keep her balance in these ridiculous floppy things that cut her feet off from the ground no Twilight think of something else think of how good the rest of your clothes feel.
Good point. She'd sometimes worn winter clothes in Equestria, but even a bundled up pony had far less on than a human wore just to be decent. After months in clothing optional pony land, being fully dressed felt like being swaddled in comfy blankets. Twilight thrust her tummy out a few times, feeling silly but smiling at the feelings of her shirt and sweater shifting and settling. On a whim, she brought a hand up to her ear and shook it, listening to the unfamiliar ftftftftft noise of her sweater thwapping against her foreleg. She was in favor of wearing things, but she'd never before liked it so much she'd been into listening to her clothing. They said that the purpose of travelling was to know the place you came back to, but they didn't say anything about becoming a… reverse nudist? Great.
Twilight stole a sidelong glance at her wife. Sunset was keeping her face forward, but a grin on her lips said that she'd spotted what Twilight was dealing with and enjoyed the spectacle. Ever so slightly peeved, Twilight slowed her step and took a good look at Sunset's hindquarters, looking for that small confident lift-and-swish of Sunset's tail to tell her whether Mrs. Smug was doing so well herself.
Once Twilight realized she was staring at her wife's butt, she snapped her gaze straight ahead and pushed with her hind legs to catch up with Sunset. By the time she realized why this wasn't working, she was trying to keep up the gait with her forelegs.
Twilight managed to avoid falling, but the process took a moment and at two points she had to hop on one leg. There was a certain amount of noise. By the time things settled down she stood on the concrete, swaying slightly but not daring to lift a foot, opening and closing her fists. Her arms had gone every which way after pin-wheeling and her hands, stupid spindly spider-things that they were, had been out of control the whole time. Sunset had stopped to stare and was now biting on her lip, the urge to not wake the baby slowly losing ground to the gale of laughter fighting its way to the surface.
Oh, to heck with it. The mess had made Twilight feel like some sort of two-legged centaur, and she'd had entirely too much crossbreed nonsense lately. ”Sunset? How do you deal with only having two legs?”
The mirth drained from Sunset's face. Starting to sway, she thrust Sapphire at Twilight. ”Twilight, hold Sapph. I gotta get on all fours.”
Author's Note
A silly apology story, except it's not really an apology, which is alright, since it's not really a story either. It's one scene, a character walking down a sidewalk and she doesn't fall down. Whee!