Applejack trotted through the empty farmhouse, listening to the sound of her hooves echo aloud. She went through her checklist in her head; She locked the barnyard gate. She feed the livestock and locked the barn. And she cleaned the apple barrels. Nothing else to do. Nothing else to do. Her one last chore, her final activity that she would have to do found its way into her mind. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to somehow vacate her mind of the thought. She ran her hooves through her mane, trying to calm down before she did something she would regret.
Regret. She opened her eyes. Regret. With that one word in her mind, she created a thought. Applejack had regretted many things in her life. But she wanted to do one thing she knew she wouldn’t regret. And as she thought more about it, she knew she wouldn’t regret this. Reassuring herself, she sat down at the table. She already had a quill and a piece of paper waiting for her. She has been planning to do this for months. Tonight, she hopes she can finally go through with it.
She takes in a deep, reassuring, breath, and starts to write.
Dear Everypony,
Ah don’t really know how ta start this. But Ah guess that Ah’ll be as honest as possible while writin’ this. Ah haven’t been very happy these past few months. And Ah feel mighty sorry ta say this but, Ah’ve been lying ta most of you for the longest time now. Ah would always put on a smile and a happy face. Ah’d always tell you that Ah was happy as a porcupine in a needle factory, or that Ah was right as rain. But deep inside, Ah knew I couldn’t stand ta be here much longer. Ever since Ma and Pa died, well let’s just say Ah haven’t been very happy since. But Ah knew that Granny Smith, Big Mac, and ‘course Apple Bloom would need me. So, Ah promised myself that’d Ah always put on a happy face and muddle through for ‘em. So Ah did for the years. Ah did my best to be there when Big Mac was hurt, and Ah had to buck all the apples myself. Ah did my best to be there when Apple Bloom tried to get her cutie mark. Ah did my best to be there whenever Granny got sick. Ah did my best. And even my best made me miss Apple Bloom gettin’ her cutie mark, and Big Mac’s weddin’. Ah still tried. Ah’ve always tried. But when Big Mac moved away with his family, Apple Bloom went off for school, Ah wasn’t sure how Ah could take that. But Ah knew Ah still had Granny Smith. Ah’ve always had Granny Smith. But since she passed, Ah couldn’t even fake a smile no more. Now Ah know ya’ll are gonna try and make a big fuss over this, and Ah just want ta tell ya to stop it. This has been a long time comin’, whether ya knew it or not. Ah do want my friends to know that Ah always did love ‘em. Ah always did have fun. But Ah just never found myself happy. Ah’m sure ya'll will say that you didn’t try to abandon me, and that ya could’ve stopped me. But you’d all be wrong. There’d be nothin’ anyone could do to stop me. Ah’ve thought about this releaf for years now, and Ah finally think that Ah can do it. Ah don’t ya’ll to make a big deal o’er this, Ah want to just accept it. And Ah want everypony to know that at least Ah tried.
-Yours, Honestly, Applejack
Finally satisfied, she sets down the quill. She thinks about adding something in apologizing for the tear stains, but decides against it. She’s not sure if she should be smiling, but she finds that she is. She can’t tell if she’s smiling and laughing, smiling and crying, or just going insane, but she feels definite in her resolve. She silently grabs a rope, and heads out to the barn.
Author’s Note: This format may seem a little weird, but I wanted to give Applejack her southern accent, but not to the extent it’s hard to read. This is supposed to be as Applejack would have wrote it, not as she would have said it.
