In Cider, Information

by Norm De Plume

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Daring Do, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other
Length: 4348

Goldie Delicious has wandered off to the next great adventure, leaving behind an important piece of Apple and Earth Pony history. Somepony must go into her cabin to retrieve it.

An Earth Pony Family Historian has moved on.

As is tradition, the Family sets a cider keg up on a table, inside a palatial tent, and somepony chimes the tip of a horseshoe off the rim of a crystal glass.

So are the branches of the Apple Family summoned to their duty.

Written for the EverFree Northwest Scribblefest 2018

Published 2018-03-04 05:20:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-03-04 05:20:06 UTC

Chapter 1

Miss Apple fretted.

There she sat, the cider's tang still prickling her tastebuds. It swirled through her head and opened her mind to the truth. To the duty now entrusted to her. She had entered the mourning tent as a mare called from Canterlot, bearing the responsibility of a family. She would leave bearing their secret and their greatest heirloom.

Her gaze strayed to the keg in the middle of the room, its three remaining glasses gathered in a knot by the tap. As First Arrival, she had tapped it herself. The others would arrive from across Equestria soon enough, and join her in carrying her new knowledge.

Goldie Delicious had gone on her next great adventure, and her job as Family Historian was over. Her cabin remained, however, stuffed from floor to ceiling with its contents. Except the cats, thank Celestia. Cousin Applejack had enlisted her friend Fluttershy to lead that herd somewhere less dingy. Sorting dusty Earth Pony heirlooms by mouth was disgusting enough without the layers of hairballs and dander.

Miss Apple briefly entertained the fantasy that one of the other three Arrivals would be a unicorn from some long-lost branch of the Family. The possibility existed, didn't it? Wasn't Big McIntosh courting a unicorn baker? Smart boy, that Mac. Perhaps he would answer the Call from Ponyville. Somepony familiar would be a blessing right about now.

Apple Family Tradition went deep, like tree roots. When a family historian moved on, a delegation would raise a tent near their home. A specific tent, often stored deep in somepony's attic and only produced for these occasions. The embroidery was too fine for everyday use.

Same with the cider barrel. A special blend, filled with family magic, would sit sealed on a table with fine crystal glasses guarding it. The last pony leaving the tent would tap the tip of a horseshoe against the rim of each glass. So would the Call go out like ripples in the water, the chime reaching the ears of various Family members, and fading only once they entered the tent.

Some ponies would be lucky and barely make it down the road before the Call bade them to return. Others lived distant lives, scattered across Equestria, and Miss Apple had heard ancient stories of long, perilous journeys pursuing both duty and the removal of that infernal ringing from a pony's ears.

Canterlot wasn't that far away and she'd made good time once the ripples reached her. Entering the tent had laid a spell on her. She was Miss Apple, now and until the end of her obligations, and the others who arrived would be similarly known. It made no sense to her, since a cutie mark was more identification than a name, but no Earth Pony could alter the ancient magic. It dwelled too deeply inside them.

So she sat, she waited, and she hoped.

Soon, more hoofsteps and rustling came from outside, and she rose from her cushion to see if the pony in question was one she knew.

An elderly Earth stallion made his way through the drapery covering the entrance. As he set hoof on the carpeted floor of the pavilion, his ears relaxed from their strained posture. The Call had faded for him.

Hmm. White-streaked mane, faded amber coat. Pear cutie mark. Well, well. She'd heard of his return to Ponyville. “Miss Apple, from Canterlot.”

“Mr. Pear, from Ponyville,” he responded, his voice croaking. “I suppose from Vanhoover, also.” He glanced around the small tent. “Why am I here?”

“The Apple Family sent out a Call,” she informed him. Not every branch would know the news. Any pony who heard the chime would either follow it to the source, or resign themselves to the ringing in their ears. “Goldie Delicious has gone on before us.”

A significant pause greeted that statement. “Ah,” he rumbled. “She kept the family history, did she?”

“Mmhmm.” Miss Apple's green pigtails bobbed as she nodded.

“Very well.” Snorting, Mr. Pear eyed the cider keg. “The Pears do things differently, but I suppose —”

“WOOOO-EEE!”

Apple and Pear both jumped as a shout from the doorway startled them. A pale orange mare struggled through the curtains, her mane tousled and tangled. “So that was the Scariest Cave in Equestria?” she yelped. “It's so quaint!”

A brown stallion wearing a big black hat and necktie collar sidled in behind her. “Indeed. If yon flying device had not lost such altitude, we surely would have missed such an experience.”

The mare cackled, raising a hoof to Miss Apple. “Mrs. Orange, from Manehattan.” She lowered her voice, tossing her mane back. “Sorry for the loud entrance, but a featherbrained Pegasus buzzed my airship up there, and we took kind of a watery detour.”

“Mr. Pie, from Rockville,” the other stallion said, gingerly touching his ears, twitching them as they rotated. The ringing must have worn off for him, as well.

Four Earth Ponies, as it should be. Three of them coming from branches grafted long ago onto the Apple Family tree? Rather unusual. Then again, given Goldie's hoarding, having somepony not attached to every piece of Apple Family History scattered about was something useful.

“Welcome,” Miss Apple said, giving the pair some space to catch their breath and take in their surroundings. “This is Mr. Pear, and I'm Miss Apple. I hope the Call didn't pull you away from important events in your lives.”

Various murmured denials from the three older ponies. If they were anything but Earth Ponies, Miss Apple would have worried about their age, but even Mr. Pear could outlift an in-their-prime Royal Guard unicorn.

When everypony had settled, she passed out the small cider glasses, and they balanced them on the frogs of their hooves. “To Goldie Delicious,” she said, holding high her half-full glass, “who preserved Apple History by burying it in the dust and dander of time.” She drank, then looked around the small tent. “If any of you prefer to not see this through, now's the time to set that glass down and walk yourselves away.”

Mr. Pear snorted. “I owe the Apples. Can't turn my back on them again.” He swallowed the cider in a series of gulps, then shut his eyes as the taste rolled through him. “Mmmf. Well, it ain't no pears, but it does the job.” He tucked his glass into his neckerchief and sat.

As she placed her now-empty glass into the golden torc around her neck, Miss Orange's eyes stopped rolling in different directions. She shook herself again, rolling her tongue back into her mouth and working her jaw. “Well! That's certainly a pick-me-up that you won't find at brunch.”

That left Mr. Pie, who took a careful sip and smacked his lips. “Duty dost call, and we must sally forth.” He drained his glass and set it on top of his hat.

Miss Apple watched as the light dawned, and their gazes turned towards the curtains covering the entrance. They now knew what lay beneath the floor of Goldie's cabin.

“How do we decide?” Mrs. Orange asked. “Who takes it, I mean. We might already have our own, not that we'd know . . .”

“Ours brings fortune's favour to the Pie Family farm,” Mr. Pie said. “My daughter guards it jealously, and would look unfavourably on another so close by. I shall decline ownership.”

Mr. Pear and Mrs. Orange exchanged looks. “You take it, since you're in Ponyville,” she offered. “The next Apple Family reunion isn't too far away, and by then, we'll have a new Historian.”

Miss Apple discreetly slumped as the tension drained from her spine. She wouldn't have to bring it back to Canterlot! Not so close to the Princesses who might sense the magic and come looking. At least Ponyville had the Elements of Harmony to help camouflage the talisman's magic. It would live there for a little while and bless Sweet Apple Acres.

This would work. They could keep the secret safe.

She rose to lead them on their task.

And then Princess Twilight Sparkle stepped through the curtain, her long, violet horn aglow with alicorn magic.

All the hope rising in Miss Apple's heart crashed as a new spell surged through the room.

“Apple Fritter?”

What? No! Not her real name! Apple Fritter whined as the Family spells tumbled to pieces about her. Her hooves sank into the rugs, the Earth Pony backing up as the alicorn in the doorway advanced.

A glowing orb soared up to illuminate the room and Princess Twilight gazed around, stretching her wingspan to block the doorway. “Grand Pear?” she asked. “Igneous Rock Pie? And — I'm sorry, but I only recognize you as an Orange. Your niece Applejack neglected to bring us around the last time we visited Manehattan.” She held out a hoof, smiling. “I'm Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship.”

Oh, wonderful. Apple Fritter watched sourly as Mrs. Orange indulged in rarified manners and made quick small talk with the Princess. This was Earth Pony business, and they didn't need an outsider sticking her horn in.

Princess Twilight appeared in front of her. “I'm sorry about Goldie Delicious. From what Applejack said, she meant so much to your family.”

Apple Fritter's eyelid twitched. More than you know, Princess. Now, move aside, please.

“In fact, I get the sense she was something more,” she continued, moving past to examine the cider keg. “Do you know why?” At assorted head-shaking from the Four, she narrowed her gaze. “I'll tell you. Because somewhere out there, Daring Do is circling the area.”

Three other pairs of eyes turned to Apple Fritter, who clenched her teeth. “So?” she asked through them. “The Scariest Cave in Equestria is a little ways up the trail. Plenty of interesting things there for an adventurous pony, I'd imagine.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “My friends Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie mentioned Daring was in Ponyville the other day. She borrowed a scrapbook of the time Pinkie Pie and the Apples visited Goldie. When she returned the album, one photograph wasn't there. Can you imagine which one?”

“Wouldn't know. Didn't make the trip with them.” Her jaw ached with the pressure.

“Pinkie Pie took only one picture inside Goldie's house, and it's not in her scrapbook now.” Twilight shrugged. “I've learned a few things as Princess, but one of the most important is: 'If it's of interest to Daring Do, then it should be of interest to me'. If she's planning to steal an Apple Family heirloom, I'd like to stop her without too much fuss. So, tell me what she's after.”

Apple Fritter shook her head. “You've never been inside Goldie's house, Princess. Finding anything valuable in there, let alone useful, would take days. Weeks, even!” With some luck, that artifact rustler would end up hogtied somewhere in a pit, like in her books. Pegasi weren't allowed near their talismans, and if the ground itself could swallow her up, it'd surely be a favour. “Her cutie mark's probably on the fritz because we got so many heirlooms under one roof.”

“You're stalling,” Twilight prodded gently. “What happens if she gets her hooves on it?”

Mrs. Orange stepped between them. “You know, Fritter, we could use some nice, friendly, unicorn help. It would mean not picking up all those dusty books with our mouths or sticking our noses in dark cupboards.” She shuddered. “Goldie had so many cats.”

“Family. Members. Only,” Apple Fritter gritted out. Her mane spontaneously frazzled, and she could feel the points of her braids splintering as she repressed her annoyance. “I know, I know cousin AJ says you're an 'Honorary Apple', Princess, but if that don't hold cider, we could be in a mite of trouble.”

“I understand trouble.” Princess Twilight's worried expression etched itself deeper, and her stance took on a mirror of Apple Fritter's splayed, head-lowered posture. “I'm supposed to be a Princess for all of you, and I can't do that if you hide behind the family tree.” She gestured around her. “I've wrapped winter with you, gathered your apples, and saved your family's farms, both throughout Equestria and back in Ponyville. So please, trust me now?”

Apple Fritter stared back. Oh, why couldn't the Call have picked Applejack? As nutty as her cousin was, passing out 'Honorary Apple Family' status like free fritter samples, at least she had experience dealing with Princesses, treasure-seekers, and carrying the weight of family on her withers. Cousin Applejack would trust her friend and tell her everything she knew. Ponies like her didn't embrace secrets.

Apple Fritter, meanwhile, was just Apple Fritter. She baked, she raised barns, and she square-danced. She shouldn't be staring down an alicorn Princess who sought the mysteries of her tribe, but the Call had left her no choice. She'd been the first to arrive, the youngest of the Four, and so the responsibility fell on her.

Also, Daring Do lurked outside. What did she know? Who had she talked to? Did she ... Apple Fritter fought the sudden gulp as she considered the question. Did she want their talisman?

The panic nibbling up her spine bucked her brain into action, and so she moved her flank. “Princess, you're going to need a drink.”

~-~-~-~-~

“Start at the beginning,” Princess Twilight coaxed, a glass floating along in her magic as the five ponies exited the pavilion behind Goldie's cabin. “Help me understand before I drink this.”

“Right. Back to the time of the Three Tribes.” Apple Fritter nodded. “We all know how it went: Earth Ponies grew food, Unicorns raised the Sun and Moon, Pegasi wrangled the weather. It's true, Earth Ponies grew food. Lots and lots of food, and they paid two-thirds of it for good weather and warm sunbeams. All three tribes saw their numbers grow because they ate so well.”

Her hind hoof dripped cider and she tried to ignore the twinge in her fetlock as she continued. “So from there, Unicorns continued to raise the Sun, Pegasi continued to shuttle clouds around, and Earth Ponies plowed more and more land. Their own magic strained to keep up with the number of mouths to feed. Then they dug down deep one day, and found a little piece of legend.”

“Of course they did.” Princess Twilight rolled her eyes. “It's always an ancient pony legend.”

Apple Fritter shot her a disdainful look. “It was twelve hundred years ago. Do you know how many artifacts were even created in the two centuries before Celestia?”

“Far too many!” The Princess yipped as she stomped the ground, her cider glass wobbling in her magical field. “It doesn't matter when they were made, or how long ago they were lost, but eventually, they end up causing me problems!”

“I can take them off your hooves!” the treeline suddenly twittered.

Growling, Apple Fritter whirled, nearly stumbling headlong into Igneous Pie. “SCRAM, YOU HARD-HEADED WINGNUT!” she bellowed, the force of her voice boiling the air and sending birds flapping.

Deafened silence ensued, then a tiny, miffed, “They belong in a museum!” floated out from the canopy.

Apple Fritter glared into the woods for a good ten seconds, trying to spot the wily flyer, then she turned back to Twilight. “So, that's the background, Princess. Time for you to know what we know. Even a sip will suffice, but you'd be a fool not to enjoy the last of our very best cider.”

Princess Twilight hovered the glass in front of her muzzle. “Welp, it's probably tastier than Zecora's flashback potion.” She sniffed it, whickered appreciatively, then drank it down. As she swallowed, her eyes widened, her irises flaring black and sparkling as she absorbed Apple Family magic.

“The Sunstone,” she whispered. “You have the Sunstone?”

“A fragment of it,” Apple Fritter said. “Somewhere beneath those floorboards, passed down through generations of Smiths and Apples, and Daring Do can't have it.”

Princess Twilight's mouth opened, then closed, then she tried again to form words. “But, the Sunstone?” she squeaked. “The gem that kept ancient Flutter Valley from turning to darkness?”

“The Earth Ponies planned to use it for their own weather, rather than depending on the unicorns and Pegasi, but if one of the other tribes discovered this —” Apple Fritter made a face. “—they'd declare war. So they sent for Smart Cookie. She came to study the gem, then she ordered it cut into twelve pieces. They sealed the shards inside talismans, and gave them to the largest farming families. It boosted Earth Pony magic, just enough for them to feed the three tribes until the time of the Windigos broke it all down.”

Ignoring Twilight's sputtering, she turned and resumed walking towards the front door of Goldie's cabin. “Where the other fragments are now, nopony really knows,” she continued, “since they're not our responsibility. But if you'll guard this door while we're inside, Princess, we can make sure ours is safe.”

Princess Twilight shook herself, recovering from the shock rather quickly. “When you find your fragment, what will you do with it?” she asked.

“We discussed it. Grand Pear can keep it safe, especially with you Elements of Harmony nearby,” Apple Fritter said. “Next reunion ain't too far off.” She placed a hoof on the door and pushed. Then she grunted and pushed harder against the weight of the hoard inside. “As for the rest of these bits and pieces, we'll, ummmf, haul them to Ponyville and have, oof, somepony catalogue them properly. Might take a few, urrfff, days to get that ... done!” Panting, she glanced askance at the Princess. “Don't suppose you got a hall or something in those fancy digs of yours you could spare for a few moons?”

Before Twilight could respond, a golden Pegasus landed on the road behind them with a smack of hooves. “You smashed the last clue!” she screeched at them, shoving her pith helmet up on her head. “Who does that?”

Well, well, here was one thing Apple Fritter finally could handle. Smacking down mobile feather dusters was practically an Apple Family sport. Turning away from the still barely-ajar front door, she planted her hooves and snorted, downgrading her ack-cent to the level of Hollow Shades hillponies. “Cider's for family only. Don't recall anypony puttin' your name down on the tree. 'Sides, thought I toldja to scram.” She waved a hind leg at the other Apple family members, gesturing for them to get into the house while she kept Daring Do's attention.

Princess Twilight moved past her, flaring her own wings to block Fritter's view. “Daring, I know these ponies. This is a family situation, not a treasure hunt.”

“Not yet,” Daring Do admitted, dancing in place, “but it could be if we don't move quickly!”

Even as the cabin door banged open behind her, Apple Fritter lunged beneath Twilight's wings, her forehead thumping beneath that ridiculous jungle helmet. “What did you do?”

To her surprise, Daring Do butted right back, sudden stars showing just how tough the Pegasus was. “Back it up, souser! Caballeron's stolen a march on us all and I need one of two things from you right now! Either show me you're still in control of your artifact, or tell me who's got it and let me get back to work.”

“I'm not showing an airborne treasure picker my family's stockpile without an explanation,” Apple Fritter shot back, curling a hoof in preparation for spinning and bucking. She wasn't AJ, but could still plant a hard one in the collar of that vest, and then she'd get her answers once the Pegasus hit the ground.

“ENOUGH.” A purple shield shot up between them, and both ponies found themselves forced apart, Princess Twilight's scowl searing them. “You two are worse than Applejack and Rainbow Dash. At least they listen to each other!” She glowered back and forth. “What's brought this on, Daring? What's Doctor Caballeron done now?”

Winded, Daring Do shook herself. “The Rainbow Falls Traders' Exchange,” she finally got out. “It's what ... how ...” Stopping, she seemed to will herself to breathe so she could communicate. “It's where we go for news, tips, rumours, and, sometimes, it's where you find the most unlikely, powerful, and deadliest artifacts in Equestria.”

Apple Fritter's jaw dropped. “What? You don't mean ...”

Daring Do paced now, calming as she walked. “Some of the ancient Earth Pony clans are long gone, their truth and history nothing but legend now. Junk gets passed down through the years, thrown in drawers, kicked into piles, and forgotten about until it's time for the Traders' Exchange. Then some pony cleans out and figures, hey, it's good enough to swap. The real treasure hunters know this, including Caballeron.”

Apple Fritter didn't like how that sounded. She looked over her shoulder at the gaping, dark entrance to the cabin, where Mrs. Orange, Igneous, and Grand Pear had vanished. Goldie Delicious never cleaned out, and everypony in the family knew it. No one wanted the junk she gathered, and the piles just grew until the cabin seemed bigger on the inside than it appeared from the outside.

Princess Twilight Sparkle's scowl eased into a frown. “Doctor Caballeron is just a middle-pony. He treasure hunts to sell, not to use.”

“He's also an Earth Pony who's stumbled across a Family talisman. He's got one, and he wants more.” Daring Do shrugged at Apple Fritter. “I don't know which one of the Twelve. He's not even in direct lineage, so the magic might not obey him. Rather not take that risk, though.”

Apple Fritter imagined not. She shivered with the urge to dive into the cabin and follow her in-cider instructions to the Sunstone shard. She had to see it for herself, to keep it to herself, to —

A bright orange mane filled the black doorway as Mrs. Orange reappeared, followed by the dusky, darker brown of both stallions.

“Well?” Daring demanded, moving closer, and dodging a sudden snarl and sharp kick from Apple Fritter.

Igneous Rock Pie removed his hat, and held it out upside down. Three golden apples nestled inside. “One is the talisman we sought. The other two are mere decoys. Only a pony whom cider and fortune favours shall knoweth the difference.”

Sure enough, one of the three had an inner glow to Apple Fritter. It assured her heart, and settled her soul through to the core. “Yep. Our talisman is still here.” She glanced at Princess Twilight, who nodded her confirmation, and so she turned back to the pathetically prancing Pegasus. “Ain't tellin' you which one, either. Take our word for it, or not.”

Daring Do snorted steam, but backed up before Apple Fritter's hooves whirled near her ribs again. “So you've got one. Great. Caballeron's going for ...”

“Two.” Apple Fritter cut her off.

“What?”

“We've got two. Two talismans accounted for.” Apple Fritter backed up close to her family. “Two long branches. Don't matter which, but they're on the same tree. Might even have more, but only the family historians can answer that.” She glanced to her left, then to her right, secure in her relations. “Tell you what, you find out what's still missing, what Caballeron's looking for, then you come on back to chat some more. He can't put the Sunstone back together without our shards.”

Grand Pear snorted as he lifted a hoof out of a pile of lampshades that had slithered out of the cabin and attempted to drag him back. “We might even still be here when you do.”

Princess Twilight waved her hoof, grinning wildly. “Actually! Now that Daring Do has brought this concern to Royal Attention, I believe we can officially transport all of these Apple Family heirlooms to The Castle of Friendship. Once they're safe, we'll examine them for any undue magical influence. Anything not considered dangerous will be returned for proper display as part of Apple history.” She bowed her head to the Four, then tipped Apple Fritter a wink. “It's the least I can do after your generous gift earlier.”

“Hah. Not bad, Princess.” Daring Do spun up into the air and tipped her pith helmet. “Keep tracking me like this, and maybe one day we'll get to an artifact before half of Equestria's bad guys. I'll be in touch at the fancy castle. Later!” Rearing back, she sped off before anypony could get in one more parting shot.

Apple Fritter turned her head, checking that the flighty picker hadn't slipped a wing into Igneous' hat to snag a golden apple. One, two, three. Nope. All there. All safe. “Divide them up, Mr. Pie,” she suggested. “Get the right one where it's supposed to go.”

“Verily,” he agreed, turning to huddle with Mrs. Orange and Grand Pear.

Apple Fritter's legs wobbled, and she tottered over to lean against the cabin wall, kicking a stray picture frame aside. She could really use some cider right now. Such a shame she'd stove in the barrel and flipped it so Daring Do couldn't snatch a sip of enlightenment. “Well, Princess, how did we do?”

Princess Twilight raised an eyebrow. “You almost fought Equestria's most legendary, yet irritating, adventure pony. You tried to hide information from a Princess. And you ruined half a barrel of the best cider the Apple Family makes, all in a failed attempt to keep your secrets.” She shrugged and lifted off the ground to avoid the slowly spreading morass of family heirlooms. “On the plus side, I've seen much worst first adventures. Half marks, Fritter.” She flew over to one of the nearby wagons, intent on emptying it for transport.

It wasn't an adventure. It was a duty. And I fulfilled it

With a sigh, Apple Fritter picked a path through the hoard. She delicately stepped over a battered cornucopia, a clutch of rusty horseshoes, and an old, stringless mandolin.

About to set foot inside the cabin, she paused and considered the items she had just walked past. What are the chances Goldie Delicious also visited the Traders' Exchange?

-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

FIN
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