Man and Machine

by LifeIsForPenguinHugs

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Violence, Princess Celestia, Death, Human, Narcotics, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Original Character
Length: 3448

A pony automaton befriends a lone man on his journey through a destroyed world.

In Celestia's Year of 678 a new group of the Equestrian Royal Guard has come up with a new division: The Royal Equestrian Inter-dimensional Exploratory Corps. Sadly things go awry as the majority of the members are slaughtered and only one thing remains. Sadly it is has very little of what we call a free will, it is a Pony Information Recording Golem (Patent Pending). It is influenced by those in Equestria but before it can complete its mission, it runs across a man who calls himself a, "Devil Dog."

Published 2018-03-04 21:30:12 UTC
Last updated 2018-04-22 03:06:10 UTC

IK-A

A Cold Summer Day

The small group of six unicorns, and three earth ponies sat as they mentally prepared themselves for their journey. Their mission was simple: Discover. The group bore light mail armor around their joints and a small metallic helm, a unicorn with taped glasses and buck teeth was putting enough mana in the gollum to last a month before it needed to recharge. The machine's eyes glowed green and it whirred to life with an electric hum. The geeky pony had a smug grin as he now whispered into the being's ears, "Walk." The word seemed to connect something in it's head and it could now walk, the grin grown more smug.

"Hey Four-Eyes is the recorder ready?" The geeky unicorn rolled his eyes as the damn dirty...dirt pony yelled at him for the fourth time today.

With a very noticeable lisp the unicorn replied, "Yesss the automaton isssss ready Commander Mangos." The dirt pony commander smiled and turned to finish her conversation. The unicorn growled slightly with hatred dripping in every animalistic action he took. He whispered into the being's ear, "Don't sssave hher." His four eyes filled with hate as he stepped away and packed up his tools.

*1300 Equestrian, 0700 Dimension 001*

The nine bowed as their liege came into the laboratory, "My little ponies today marks a great day in Equestrian history, the first documented travel to another dimension via chaotic magics used by ponies ! Now rise, and go forth and mark two world's histories forever!" She smiled as her ponies rose and marched to the golden circle. The six unicorn lit their horn and drew in nature's chaos and launched it at a golden circle of herb and chalk lines. The line glowed bright red, then blue and lastly a steady green. However, only eight ponies jumped in without a last word. A earth pony pushed the recording golem into the portal and whispered, "One small step for pony, one mega large leap for ponykind."

The ponies were standing in the middle of a trail in a dark wooded area, the earth pony commander spoke clearly and calmly. "V formation on the double." The nine formed an arrow with the recording golem in the middle, said golem looked about the area and recorded the temperature and the humidity. The most notable was that the temperature was 22 degrees Celestius. Soon however it heard merry laughter in the bushes, and it noted a silver stick well stick out from the green leaves. A small boom, a flash of white and the unicorn holding the rear had its chest explode in a red mist. A flash of light and the commander had her leg disappear splatter in a mush of pinkish red, yet she did not die. Her screaming for help was cut short by more booms, she lay on the ground crying. Yet the machine helped not, it only felt one thing to do: fall down. As it fell down the area of high concentrated magic was hit by a rock, causing it to shut down.

*Golem's*

With a wall of green text of twos and threes flashed four times for six seconds, then a green word appeared. 'REBOOTING' along with it was a white loading bar that went to 75% then to 99% back down to 1% then 100%. The magic supply slowly drained as it turned on, as it turned it recorded more booms and frightened screams. It stood fully and gazed around the dark room that it was in, the bleeding bodies of the group were there hanging upon hooks. Their swords and armor were in a corner, the slow movements it made were careful as the ground was slick with dark pony blood. The screams were gone and the small clacks were replaced with stomps upon wood.

The steps stopped outside of the large wooden door and said door came crashing down. A sand colored paw came in with a dark forest colored leg. The leg lowered and in walked a upright being similar to that of the apes of the Southern Islands. It held an odd dark wooden stick with a black metal stick attached to that wooden stick, the middle portion had a crystal like banana with little gold cylinders in it. It gazed at me and the hate in its eyes dispersed and it spoke in a confused tone, "What in the god damn?"

With estimation of time passing it had been one Equestrian hour since the arrival. The being before sat across with its lower legs crossed. It had taken us out of the building to into the wooded area. As it stared it spoke again, "So what are you again?" It had asked me the same question but I started to print out the answer. With a buzzing and scratch of quill the small square of parchment came from my mouth waiting for it to pluck it and read it. "So you're saying that you're some kind of robot from a dimension of horses?" I printed a card that confirmed his question and then printed out one that asked what it was.

*Daniel's POV*

My day was starting normal, wake up go out to kill some bandits and other raiders. But my day had gone weird during the normal assault on a new compound I had rescued a horse made of dirt. Now I was having a one sided conversation with it, why was it one sided? Well it couldn't speak, it could print out cards. It had a card for me this time after asking it what it was, as I gripped the card I felt the texture of the paper. It felt rough and I could feel every bump and contour of said paper. It read one simple sentence, 'What are you?' I looked at it and back at the card then spoke up, "The name's Daniel but some would call me a Devil Dog. Do... do you got a name?" It seemed to process me question for just a moment.

With the buzzing of an old printer a card came out with a small ding. It read, 'I am called Pony Information Recording Golem.' I stared at it for a long time before responding, "No I mean like what people call you." Again it processed the question before not printing out anything. "I'm just gonna assume that is a no." I brought my hand to my chin in a thoughtful expression and gained the best idea ever. "I'm gonna call you Baxter, Bax for short." Before I could let it start to print out a question I added, "I won't remember that long ass name. So as a computer thing you need to learn right?" It printed out a card that had yes written on it, "So you want to walk with me? I've been needing another companion since my last one was eaten." I said the last part in a joking tone but it still ate at me. The next card had, 'Our mutual process of walking will be beneficial to my research.' I grinned slightly as I stood an put the rifle on my back and gave a slight tug on my holsters. They proved to hold and I started down to the river to make camp with Bax following me.

*Two Hours Later*

We, well I made camp Baxter was just watching me. It was a tad unnerving to actually have company that didn't have eyes drawn on it. I had a small pit dug and the tarp set up for the small shelter. I knelt down by the pit and started to hit the small metal striker on the black rod causing white hot sparks to rain down and ignite the tinder. I smiled and whispered to myself, "Ugg make fire." I stood and fetched the metal canteen from my belt and took a swig of the refreshing water inside. The sun was starting to set and I sat down by the fire with my old .22 rifle in my lap, my holstered firearms sat beside me ready to fire in case of something. "Baxter?" His, since it is a robot he has no gender but I decided that he was a he, looked at me with those balls of green eyes. "Could you hand me that green bag over there?" He looked at the small bag for a moment and moved to nudge it to me.

I grabbed the top of it as he got it close to me, "Thanks bax." I unzipped the zipper and grabbed a single black case. And sat it on my lap, the little locks made clacks as I unlocked them. Inside was a set of small white rags and a dissembled pole along with a copper wired brush. I heard Bax's little steps as he walked to me. "What do you want Bax?" I heard his printer and I grabbed his card, it read 'What are you doing being named Daniel?' "I'm cleaning my stuff, gotta make sure they don't you know," I looked at him for a brief moment before finishing my sentence, "explode." I assembled the pole and attached the cloth to the end and set down to clean my rifle first. I rammed it down for a few strokes then took it out and replaced the rag. After I felt that the rifle was cleansed from dirt and other things of the like I did the same to my handgun.
Baxter sat beside me, his eyes recording everything I do. With my handgun done I grab the little sawn down .410 shotgun, I gripped the wooden body and lowered the lever down. The barrel slid down with ease as it should, I removed the little black shell and set it down beside me and grabbed the copper brush and set out to clean it. All in all the cleaning only took a short bit of time, but in that time period the sun set. I laid back on the ground and put my hands behind my back, before I went to slumber two things happened. The first being me mumbling, "Good night," to Baxter and the second thinking that my hallucination will be gone and I can deal with my insanity at a later date.

Author's Note

Yes I know, LIFPH it is incredibly stupid to write a story while you have another story going on. Well I had this idea at 12:17 AM Central Standard Time and needed to write it down before I forgot. Please if you see an grammatical mistakes comment it and you will be thanked.

An Inebriating Conversation

IK-A

*Dawn, Dimension 1*

The sun rose in a bright ball of fire, the birds chirped and made other noises that birds make. The human known as Daniel rose and looked over to see if his insanity was still there; which it was. With a sigh he stood and twisted his back and started his daily stretches, Baxter rebooted and noted the peculiar scene unfurl in front of him. With a short print he asked, 'Being known as Daniel, what are you doing?' He stopped and simply responded.

"Gotta keep limber, don't know when I gotta out run something!" Baxter accepted this and wrote it down in his data base while Daniel continued to stretch his muscles. When he finished the backpack was thrown open in a search of a year old granola bar somewhere in the bottom. He shoved aside a plethora of trinkets and moved more special items, soon he found that the bar was eaten by a mouse as evident by the teeth chewed wrapper. With a grumble he reached around for half eaten Tic-Tacs. "Tics, the breakfast of champs!" With a small smile he downed a few of the orange mints. "Come on Bax time to get a move on!" Daniel threw his back pack on his shoulder and marched on.

*Three Hours Later, Daniel*

It has been around three hours and the Tic-Tacs did nothing to aid in my hunger. My stomach growled quite loudly as I hung my head low, Baxter was oddly quiet. No electronic humming or other computery sounds, it was a tad dark and as I gazed up I felt a small splash of rain fall upon my face. I looked down and saw the damned building hiding in the darkest corner of this forest. I shuddered as I saw the faded yellow and blue building and shuddered, the only three of the four letters hung on he now chipped concrete. 'IK A,' the letter 'E' was face down on the ground as if it had simply decided to lay down for a nap.

My voice was high pitched, "Bax, we need to go in that building over there."

He printed out a card that read, 'Why must we being named Daniel?'

I took a deep breath in and whispered out, "We will get lost and die in the rain if we don't go." His green eyes analyzed and for the first time that I can think of, he nodded. It shocked me greatly, when did he start? Was this his first or was I not paying close enough attention? The occasional droplet of water was now becoming a downpour of rain, I picked up Baxter and sprinted for the ancient glass doors. I could feel the mud draining off of Baxter as I sprinted through the metal skeleton of the automatic doorway. As we made it inside I unceremoniously dropped Bax onto the ground, he landed with a majestic plop. I looked at him and I he was visibly thinner and somehow had dried in the ten seconds that we were inside. "Hu...how are you so dry?"

My inquiry took him a moment to process and his card came with his little ping. But instead of his normal black ink it was now purple. 'The magic used to create the automaton has a quick drying spell in place when constant wetness is no longer a threat, but the dirt will need to be replenished.' I felt my brain turn to mush as I read every sentence.

I glared and narrowed my eyes at him, and noted his eyes had a slight purplish hue to it. "Bax why is your ink purple?"

Out popped another card and it's ink was purple again, ' Actually the color is Sparklisious Purple...Wait why is typing what I say?. ' Well that answered two questions, some one was watching me through Bax.

I took a knee as I glared more into "Bax's" eyes and spoke, "Baxter if you can hear me, deny them access to you. What they're doing is not ethical. Fight it." His eyes lost his purple hue and returned to their swirling mass of green. "Bax I want you to stay here..." Suddenly I realized where we were. "OH MY FUCKING GOD! WE'RE GONNA DIE!" I realized that I screeched in a girlish tone and had my rifle at the ready. I took out the clear magazine and pulled back the slide and let the .22 round fall to the floor. Along with it I fell down to my knees and started to mutter what my good ol' great grandma taught me.

"O patre caelesti, qui es in caelis, protegas me, et a meis nocere, ut vagentur a daemonibus terram. Et nomen sanctum tuum, Ahem." I was visibly shaking as I muttered it, Bax's slim frame came into view and out popped a card.

It read, 'Why are you emotion identified scared?" Before I could respond another came out with a ding. Again it was the damned spying purple ink. 'How can you speak ancient Minotaurian? I can't even do that?! TELL ME!' As I read it I quickly gazed up to Bax's eyes and say that the purple was dying down.

"OK Bax there is so many rumors about this place I can't count them. I am going to freak out but we can't leave or you'll die." I was now hyperventilating as I spoke, "And I am starving and... and I don't know what to do!" My hand went to my heart as I hyperventilated and scooted to a nearby cash register desk and continued to panic. As I was mid panic Baxter cantered over and plopped his head down on my leg.

Out came a small card with light red ink on it instead of purple. 'Whenever you're scared think of jokes!
Why did the kitty cat cross the road?' I was greatly confused as I read the damned thing and said.

"I don't know why did the cat cross the road?"

'To get some milk!' It appeared that whoever made the joke decided that it was necessary to send out around thirty cards that read, 'HA HA AH HA!' My confusion greatly outpaced my fear and I felt the small warmth of laughter dig itself into my heart. Now the next card had, 'Now it's you're turn!!!!'

I sucked my teeth for a second before getting my greatest joke to come out, "Alright so Jared from Subway and a little boy were walking to a dark forest. The boy stops and says, "I dob't want to go in there! It's scary!" And Jared from Subway stops and turns to the boy aghast and says, "You're scared?! I have to go out of there alone!" I giggle to myself and read the next card that pops out.

This time it was a buttery color, 'I don't get it? What does this Jared and little "boy" doing near a dark forest?' I chuckled and before I could respond we both heard the sound of a loud squeak and Baxter dropped a card that read, 'EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!'

It had me scared as well but in a less "eeeee" sort of way. I yanked the rather large handgun from its holster and aimed into the dark where the sound came from. I raised it and then heard it from yer I saw a large shadow of a hunched being come from the doors. I sprang to my feet and grabbed Baxter and ran into the darkness. After a minute of running I stopped and panted. looked into my right hand and could only exclaim one word, "Fuck!" Why had I exclaimed my fourth favorite word? Well I had dropped the Hi-Power and didn't have my rifle the only thing left was Ol' Door Knocker.

I took the .410 shotgun out of my hip holster and gripped the barrel. "Please God let me have a shell in there!" I pushed the lever down and praised every holy deity that I had loaded it. I pushed the barrel up and thumbed the hammer back into ready action. I silently cried inside as I stepped to my left and felt the crunch and scatter of bone, My face went white as I moved my boot and looked done to see a femur bone. I knelt down and saw nibble marks on the entire surface, I heard a scurry and whipped the sawn down shotgun to the direction and fired. A bright flash blinded me for only a moment as I shakily walked to a small form. I quickly reloaded and kicked the small body into the light and saw that it was a...gerbil.

Granted it was hard to tell due to it being shredded but I was certain that it was one. I started to laugh, I laughed harder and harder as it dawned on me. The rumors were wrong there was no monster, I sighed in relief until a monstrous screech came from the back. I grew paler than before and gripped Bax by his under belly and sprinted out. I could feel the thudding of a monster's steps and its hot breath upon my neck. I saw my rifle in the dark and the stock had been nibbled upon. I leaned down a tad and grabbed the strap and yanked it upward. I huffed and puffed as I ran out into the muddy forest. I looked back and as I almost sank into a muddied ditch, I saw an outline of a great beast and I saw its red beady eyes glare into my own. It roared one last time, I shook down to my bone and from all the dear I threw up my small breakfast on my muddied shirt and leaned against a near by tree.

Author's Note

I never really wanted the Mane Six to get a full appearance so the color text will work until I decide for a chapter with them. As always with joy - LIFPH.